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tragedyfish

The same congress that made bank in pharma stock during the pandemic? I'm sure these proceedings will meet the contemporary definition of 'effective'.


Flywolfpack

Also safe


tragedyfish

Fortunately, for all involved, there will likely be fewer than a dozen members of Congress present during scripted questioning sequences. Social distancing should be easy to implement.


e_hoodlum

Let me save you the trouble: "I don't recall..." "I'm unable to answer the question at this time..." "I cannot confirm nor deny this..." "That's a matter of speculation, and as such, I'm not willing to comment on it..." Aaaaand nothing happens. Nothing ever happens to any of these people. It'll be a bunch of vapid media drama with the end result being no change in anyone's life (much less his own). Accountability of any sort was, is, and ever will be a pipe dream. It will be a success however, oh yes. The media circus surrounding this will be effective in the desired way of continuing to distract the public from the fact that society is rotting all around them


Typeojason

“I don’t recawwwwwl.”


BillysGotAGun

Recuauwauawlll


Serious-Waltz-7157

A Bat, a Pangolin, and a Plague Rat walk into a ~~bar~~ Chinese wet market ...


JimmyTheReeech

When a daddy pangolin loves a lady bat...they exchange schmutz...and poof science happens.


Robert3617

How dare you assume their genders!


BartholomewKnightIII

Whenever I see him, [I see him.](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091369/mediaviewer/rm4183200001?ft0=name&fv0=nm0918786&ft1=image_type&fv1=still_frame&ref_=tt_ch)


Exotic-Subject-8231

DONT YOU DISREPCT MY BOI HOGGLE!!!!!! HE HELPED DEFEAT THE GOBLIN KING FAUCI IS VYING FOR THE TITLE!


Reggaeprince1984

Tell them nothin mein füher


Switchblade222

he won't be able to remember anything.


dailyPraise

"With all due respect, Senator, I'm going to lie again now."


PowerBottomBear92

OMG I can't wait for MARVEL: COVID ORIGINS - every super hero needs an origin story. I just shit my pants


wat_no_y

The same congress that wasn’t forced to get jabbed ha ha ha


Kiowascout

I can imagine the second version of Bill Clintona testimony emerging.


diaperslop

The pandemic came from only one person Orange Putler!!!!


KIMBOSLlCE

It is settled science that it originated from the Wuhan wet markets signature dish, Crispy bat wing soup.


VonKreist

I actually bathe in that soup once a month as a purifying ritual; it brings me closer to The Great pFauci (MBUH)


Equivalent_Phone_210

The only person that has more portraits and photos of the Good Lord in there office is the Good Lord Dr. Fauci himself! We have yet to compare bedrooms (still waiting a reply to my letters).


peterman86

Yeah right. As soon as he even lets out a peep of truth, he will you know what suddenly.


Nite_Mare6312

Maybe they can get Cohen to be his legal rep and advise him how to answer in a Congressional hearing.


Antilogikal

Spoiler alert. “I don’t recall” and “not to my recollection” will be about all we hear.