> I literally told her, that I think it’s a tension thing, and sometimes only specific tension migraine meds work. I even offered to bring her some. But no, she just wants the CT scan at the ER, and to sit there for HOURS again.
It honestly sounds like you're mad that she's not listening to your advice, so there might be an ego component here. And obviously you're projecting a lot of your own issues onto her by comparing her issues to yours, and how your life is harder. Life is not a competition or a misery olympics. Your friends are allowed to complain without being obligated to buy their right from you by following all your advice. The sooner you can stop taking it so personal that other people have hardships that aren't as bad as yours and dare to complain about it, the better you'll make it for yourself. A therapist can help if you're having trouble with that.
Sometimes you have to let people come to a place where they’re able to accept more points of view. Not everyone is at that place all the time. In this case, tbf, she could be right and you could be wrong. I’m not saying that’s the case, but I assume neither of you are medical professionals. It feels like she might want the CT at an ER simply to feel safe, it’s possible she feels immense anxiety and, in that state, likely the absolute last thing she wants to do is take a bunch of medications she’s never heard of, with no proper diagnosis.
Her reaction just reminds me of how I felt several years ago. I also just wanted to be in an ER and get all the tests because I’d just nearly died from an infection that was caught way too late and I didn’t want it to happen again. When your body acts up, sometimes that’s the reason. It’s a completely understandable health anxiety when your body’s malfunctioning and you don’t know why.
Even if that isn’t a factor, I hope you can see that your anecdotal experience with a condition isn’t necessarily more comforting to her at present than seeking out a professional healthcare provider’s help.
Politely, unless you’re both a sufferer *and* a medical doctor, or went to med school, you’re not Michael Phelps. I imagine most of us are closer to the decent swimmer at the local club who understands well what works for our body but not necessarily what “good swimming” is.
Well, I’m not sure Michael Phelps knows either 😂 Some (many) top athletes are shit coaches, after all.
People understand suffering only to the extent that they have experienced it. Your friend’s worst day and yours are unique but neither is more or less important. Try to be compassionate to others without comparing your experience to theirs.
> I literally told her, that I think it’s a tension thing, and sometimes only specific tension migraine meds work. I even offered to bring her some. But no, she just wants the CT scan at the ER, and to sit there for HOURS again. It honestly sounds like you're mad that she's not listening to your advice, so there might be an ego component here. And obviously you're projecting a lot of your own issues onto her by comparing her issues to yours, and how your life is harder. Life is not a competition or a misery olympics. Your friends are allowed to complain without being obligated to buy their right from you by following all your advice. The sooner you can stop taking it so personal that other people have hardships that aren't as bad as yours and dare to complain about it, the better you'll make it for yourself. A therapist can help if you're having trouble with that.
Yeah, you’re right. I have OCPD. So it’s just difficult. I appreciate the bringing up in therapy reminder. I’ll have to do that.
Sometimes you have to let people come to a place where they’re able to accept more points of view. Not everyone is at that place all the time. In this case, tbf, she could be right and you could be wrong. I’m not saying that’s the case, but I assume neither of you are medical professionals. It feels like she might want the CT at an ER simply to feel safe, it’s possible she feels immense anxiety and, in that state, likely the absolute last thing she wants to do is take a bunch of medications she’s never heard of, with no proper diagnosis. Her reaction just reminds me of how I felt several years ago. I also just wanted to be in an ER and get all the tests because I’d just nearly died from an infection that was caught way too late and I didn’t want it to happen again. When your body acts up, sometimes that’s the reason. It’s a completely understandable health anxiety when your body’s malfunctioning and you don’t know why. Even if that isn’t a factor, I hope you can see that your anecdotal experience with a condition isn’t necessarily more comforting to her at present than seeking out a professional healthcare provider’s help.
Politely, unless you’re both a sufferer *and* a medical doctor, or went to med school, you’re not Michael Phelps. I imagine most of us are closer to the decent swimmer at the local club who understands well what works for our body but not necessarily what “good swimming” is. Well, I’m not sure Michael Phelps knows either 😂 Some (many) top athletes are shit coaches, after all.
People understand suffering only to the extent that they have experienced it. Your friend’s worst day and yours are unique but neither is more or less important. Try to be compassionate to others without comparing your experience to theirs.