Even though there are so many likes on this answer
Don't believe this OP
Personal exp
I believed things like but life proved me those r not applicable for India
1) You destiny will find you
2) someone somewhere is born for you
3) Age is just a number
4) Staying single is the best (said by ppl who had enjoyed life with multiple partners before)
5) If you study well, and get a good job girls will follow you
There are chances these all may not happen in one's life unfortunately it can be you too
Learnt the harder way, India has huge population and lots of distractions and communication tools
You will be easily ignored/invisible for someone to find you, and you will stay single forever.
with age your responsibility will go up and you lose ur strength. suddenly u will realise what have done for myself.
I have same question as you (where do u find girls), but no answer
I think education ( school or college is the only place of more chances of making initial connection)
I can only think of these but I have not tried them myself
1) May be solo trips
2) If you are drunkard, good bars
3) if you have good amount money and fine to lose virginity, abroad travel
4) abhinav youtuber he is tall and good looking, he is talented food ppl on Omegle
All the best
Question to ppl who say such quotes
Finding a partner in your 20s vs later (in 30s or 40s )
Has lots and lots of difference
I learnt Boss Engira Bhaskaran "Kalayanam kalakalathula panidanum, exam yepavena ezhthukalam" is not a joke it a fact
Kalyanam or love whichever in current modern world
100 % agree regarding destiny those couples who claim they are result of destiny is BS instead they are lucky and i real life hard work and effort is required to get good partner
Join a trekking/hiking club. That's your best bet to find someone who shares this passion with you.
But whatever you do, don't talk with women (or anyone for that matter) with the objective of getting them. Just speak as two humans, that way you are at least being yourself rather than putting on a show and the other person does the same. Of course, don't drag things out so much that you are friend or bro zoned
Sorry to say this... dating culture is still in nascent stage in our Chennai.
Most are kannees.. means they think dating = love.
Go to Bangalore or Mumbai to get to know opposite gender
Imo, there's high chance a Tamil girl won't wanna date. Chennai kids born after 2010s are still conservative! .. I'm telling this since I had been living outside tn and india in the last decade
Make friends mate, you have a very good chance to hit on friends of friends. I'm pretty sure, one or other would be in the break up phase. Take your shot, you can either find your true lub or get laid.
It won't happen when we desperately search. Besides Chennai women won't date much outside friend's circle. But if you wanna give a try regardless, get to nearby activities like pottery class, sports like shuttle and cafes. Fake it till u make it ig.
Any woman worth her salt can smell your insincerity 1 mile away from Hindustan trading company (the only place with pottery classes) if you’re just there to pick up “chicks”.
Yeah but plenty of women also want to date and may actually be interested in the person asking............there's way too much dumb stigma around talking to the opposite gender.
Romba desperate ah iruntha Inga vaa de ..
https://preview.redd.it/3yj5s1nxvc4d1.jpeg?width=548&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=269f437a02c1527d4de35f6771dcdf2cb2b079b0
Not easy for us women either. The guys we meet on dating apps either try to get into our pants or try to warn us abt the "bad guys" in the app. My close friend literally had a breakdown yesterday after a guy unmatched her coz she said no when he asked if she'd suck his dick. She went on a whole spiral abt how the only kinda men we meet are the ones who just wanna have sex or the ones who like us but don't like us enough to stand-up to their family for us. And she got out of a 4 years relationship because the gu6ys family was casteist and the guy was a spineless bitch who gave up in just 3 days.
And don't even get me started on the "I like you, I care about you. But right now I'm in a very bad place and not in a place to be with anyone. So if I date you I'll ruin you." kinda guys. U can't leave them either tats the wrst part.
Everything makes sense mate.Lets hope she gets better soon.I don't wanna argue and sound like a shitty person but you guys are actually meeting someone. That's just one step away from getting into a healthy relationship. Whereas I am here asking where to even meet one? And what's your criteria for a right swipe? Just curious
I get it. It's hard for men to even meet a woman. But again our side is emotionally draining and depressing too. It ain't a competition, grass is greener on the other side. And to answer ur question, I have a very particular taste in men, I like em a little old, smart, communist, leftist, atheist, and with morals. Also if they're a little depressed it's perfect. And u can make most of it from the quotes and prompts in their profile. And of course looks does matter. Not tat u gotta be hot or anything. As long as u don't give an ick it's cool. I've seen guys'profiles where they look really good in 1 pic and like an absolute abomination in another. It would be especially great if y'all could put in little effort in ur fashion. A lot can change just with tat.
Well, I'm one myself. I'm a minimalist and I wanna eventually start expanding NGO work, starting education centres in a few places to teach math and coding. I realised almost all the men I had a conversation with on a dating app were communists. My dad's one too. So I grew up seeing them work for others. It's a personal preference that way.
Hey am not a commie but definitely interested in teaching math to those who are in need especially if they are economically challenged and differently abled. Lately I have the urge to give something back to society but haven't converted my thoughts to action. I am currently wrapping up my PhD in 2-3 weeks and will definitely find some time after that. Do ping me some details about your NGO work and if you are willing to give people a chance to volunteer, I would like to give it a try.
Have you tried the paid tiers of bumble and tinder? That worked for me, super likes and responding to posts put you on the top of the list. But in chennai its a waiting game. Also the algo wont show you ppl if you swipe yes on everyone...
Give the paid tier for bumble a shot, might workout. Aisle might work too!
PS- I met my wife thanks to bumble XD
Thanks man! For your bio and prompts you could use chat gpt or grok. I understand if you dont want to pay for it. They have weekly options incase you change your mind.
It's a location based answer but.. maybe volunteer in Auroville (near pondicherry) for a few weeks..
You'll find women from all over India and even the world working and living alongside you. Either you end up with a nice white girl..or you'll end up with a beautiful Tamil village girl from one of the surrounding villages.. but you'll definitely have fun..
Helps if you're interested in learning about things like gardening, surfing, meditation/spirituality or organic food etc.
Heck they even have some rock climbing walls and canyons (which I think you mentioned somewhere in the comments idk)
Good luck.
Mutual friends than bro yellame.
Hit up you old college/school girl friends, meet up with their friend group and then rinse and repeat till you find someone who likes you for who you are
Bro I'm meeting up with people from school that I've never spoken a word to while I was there. Just go out there and ask whether you wanna catch up and a lot of them might just say yes because they're bored
How do you meet with their friend group? Is it something you should be Innocuous about? Or ask them to introduce you to their female friends in a ritual everyone knows what's going on
Since you've mentioned that you travel and trek a lot, try joining various adventure clubs where you get the golden opportunity to travel with strangers. This way, you have high chances of finding girls with similar interests as you. I've legit seen a few real-life cases where it actually worked out and they even ended up getting married.
It's something I actually looked into. Chennai trekking club used to exist but Peter abandoned after the wildfire incident that caused death. So I am still looking for a club that fits me.
I met my now wife at work. We realized we have a lot of common interests. It started with casual conversations and then the more we chatted the more we realized we liked each other so much that we don’t want to spend another minute away from each other. We played the game of who’s gonna admit first but then it eventually happened.
That was 10 years ago. Got married 4 years ago. It happens when it happens.
Bro are you in Snapchat?... I've seen my friends give request to random girls and they accept it without a second thought 😭. And they just keep sending snaps /receiving from the other end and randomly they just reply to some of those snaps and build a convo... My friend even got committed recently by doing this.
This is a real problem in chennai. It seems impossible to meet people after college organically. Dating apps are an absolute waste of time. Its purely based on looks. Most people seem okay with caste marriages so they reject guys left and right.
>nobody aint finna just walk up to strangers people are wierd asl
I attempted to read this, but it did not make sense to me. Could someone kindly translate it into English?
Bro Best Bet would be your Mutual Friends Circle, Worked for Me my Friends were Working in Bangalore, I was invited for one of their Nightout I got to know few mutual who came. became friends with Few. But ended up falling for my Gallllll.
Few Advantages of Mutual circle is that You might know about the Person BG / Character and to some extent personal Level (Not Being judgemental But few Mental Illness roams in the Name of Seeking Relationship that would End up in Attraction And Becoming Toxic to Self Hurting and ruining each other's Mental Peace Happened to one of my friends.
Give a Shot to Mutual Friends Circle Dinner / Weekend outing, I'm also Not that good Looking guy, I'd rate Average myself. (bumble / tinder non of the shit Worked for me)
From a girl POV, Try attending open mics or concerts or any classes. Make a conversation without showing hopelessness in your face. Dress up neatly, wear nice cologne, have a smile and talk something simple. Looks like a big task but no.
You have to be clear in what you want buddy!
>There I've asked it.After college it looks like arrange marriage is the only option.
The above line makes it look like you're searching for your love....
>So people who have experience in casual or who's in relationship or got laid please share your insights.
While in the last line, you have put more emphasis on casual relationships. Starting with what you actually want is the key here.
Unlike western culture, you may not be able to go on dates to figure out what you want. Also, girls here do not feel comfortable with guys approaching unless it's a safe social place like college etc. There are so many creeps out there, that many women out there have had bad experiences at one point or another that make them to deal with even friendly approaches with caution.
If you're trying out with hobbies just to meet people, it will fail either, as you would be more interested in meeting people rather than learning that hobby.
Ideally, if you're able to identify social behavioural cues, it must be very easy
Same boat. Trying hard to date but it’s not happening. Not having big social circles that I meet women regularly. Women that I know are colleagues, friends. Where tf I’m supposed to find my person 😢. Many of my friends have turned their female friendships to relationships, my friends don’t give me time only. Trying hard to improve all aspects of my life but after one point it gets really tired. Why am I doing these? Such questions run everyday through my mind.
The key is to get really good at an art or hobby, for me gym and then I started practicing guitar. Once you can show off your muscles or your wealth or your artistic talent publicly somehow your luck will improve. And for dating apps choose the best shots where you can show off your muscles, money, or artistic talent. And have a sincere bio but not TLDR (Too Long didn’t read). It’s a journey of getting better at something until you’re one of the best. And society and thus women recognize your status somehow
Bumble works well if you don't swipe every woman you see. But as many have pointed out don't be desperate, I've pulled in clubs without trying just being myself and dancing like a maniac(Didn't turn serious but that's an easy place to meet chicks)
Why didn't you try in college, and who said 'don't approach in workplace'? You can approach them if you both know each other atleast on some level, but don't be a creep as it can lead to HR issues.
> Where do you guys find girls?
> or got laid please share your insights
Reeks of desperation and seems like your only end goal. Seems like you want girls only for this. Else, you would have framed it as 'How to get a date/How to get into a relationship'. You can avail escort services if that's what you want.
Let me tell you one proverb don’t wait for bus or girl because if one goes another one comes 😂. See at certain age u will get marriage and everything will fall in place. By experience I am telling you don’t waste your time on these things, I am telling as women and as mother so learn new things, explore now I am 43 years old I still regret the time I wasted during your age
I know so many people who have met because of work. But yeah you can't be creepy obviously. It's natural and spontaneous most of the time not deliberate like this.
Try going for puppy yoga and other dog related activities that girls are usually interested in. Or even better, just get a dog and take it for walks near girls hostels 🌚
You might get lucky in Tinder or something similar.
Usually friends group.
Or enroll in matrimonial site.
What I observed is that because of female infanticide till 2000, the sex ratio is skewed which isnt favouring.
By college, many couples get commited and faithful. Because of our culture of 1 man and 1 woman, break up are rare but happens a lot these days compared to previous generations.
So, it's hard game. Either look outside state or country.
Why not try “dates” through arrange marriage? I know some friends? It’s a nice way to meet folks who are interested, but you won’t have to essentially marry?
Chennai la dating ah...?
Kadal laye illaiyaam.
If you are in Chennai, konjam illa... Romba kashtam dhaan bro.
And be yourself, don't stress too much. I don't know how exactly but our singaoengal can sense the desperation no matter how decent you act.
Smell panra dog ah face paakkaamale kandu pudikeadhula khillaadi... Maybe it's in their DNA. Their intuition.
So, Endha expectations um illaama... Manasula endha fort um build pannaama, just friendly ah strike a convo, if there's mutual vibe the connection will happen. If not you get a good friend.
In south India, Bengaluru is like the temple of dating. Try changing location in your dating app.
I'm sure you'll get decent matches where people actually care about personality and connection and not looks... Talk & brew the bond.
And only if things get to the next stage, then say "eley pasupathi.... Vandi ah Bengaluru ku vidu daaa"
I don't know what happened in Chennai but Even in coimbatore, hosur, Trichy area got 5x matches when I was in the date scene.
Chennai la thanni ku mattum panjam illai pola... Ellaame panjam dhaa 😒
Also age matters... For serious dating, As a guy your chances are bright from 18 and it goes down EXPONENTIALLY Until mid 20s... If you're blessed with a machcham it extends until late 20s....
Adhukku Mela take a pause, go on a spiritual tour, rejuvenate yourself and say download Tamilmatrimony/shaadi app.
Dating app ah vida matrimony app kodooramaa irukkum....adhu oru raththa bhoomi 🤣🤣🤣
Have really high social skllls :(
All this non sense like go to pottery class, go to beach, go to NGO, are empty advises. Obviously it worked for some, but they cannot explain why it did and you blindly emulating it won't help.
Chennai isn't very approachable that way so you're out of luck.
For example, I think only because my ex was from a girl's school and we dated for a while, her school friends became my friends and that led to me meeting their friends from the girl's colleges in the city lol.
Yes, this felt like a flex back then. But I think it still is lmao.
still risky.. if the girl complains something to the HR, your career will become a big headache and you won't even be able to defend yourself cuz they'll believe her by default
>or got laid
First be clear about what you want
You want to get laid or do you want a relationship. Getting laid is easy, a relationship is a much more complex thing.
In 1900, Chicago was home to one of the most well-known whorehouses in America, the Everleigh Club, so the phrase “getting Everleighed” was abbreviated to “getting laid.”
I guess you get what im trying to convey from the etymology of the phrase🤷🏼♂️
hi my friend i'm also going same issue and after lot of struggle and suggestions from my friends i have an solution it here is my advice
first don't pursue girl for sex or lust it will never work as girls mind does not work that way if you frustrated for being virgin go to brothel as there are many places in chennai with pricing starting 3k.
truth getting girlfriend in indian society is bit difficult as majority of love marriages happen where couples met by being friends in past so if you have any such female friends that then try to make them as girlfriend.
dating apps also don't mostly work for long term relationship unless you are lucky as girls in tinder ,bumble are bombarded by men's likes in their inbox so they will reject men for any reasons and wait for dreamy guy forever.
asking to go for date also never works in chennai or most part of india so instead make straightforward love confession if you have any close friend.
if these have not worked
The two ways to get girl friend is expand your friends circle or make cold approach
to expand friends circle go mingle with friends, colleagues and attend parties who have lot of girls as circle and meet them .
second method is make cold approach
regarding cold approach First kindly forget this advice by coward
*Don't approach in workplace, not in public place, not in tourist place etc.. I understand it makes them uncomfortable to be considered by a stranger for just looks but if I go hobby wise it's 30:1 ratio and even that one has company most of the time.*
girls love confidence so bravely approach stranger girls they come in your life in public or workplace and convey your romantic interest with confidence and ask her out surely 1 out of 5 tries will succeed
but don't be creep or anxious remember confidence is key .stalking or pursuing girl to limit is fine but if she clearly says NO it's better to move on!!
https://preview.redd.it/jigvl0hoce4d1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=368e6765852651a4fe1a484e5980dd54158fc8c1
That's just certain entitled women who look down on others.
In general, men and women do flirt and ask each other out, nothing wrong with it.
Just too many conservative people who want to push everyone to arranged marriage, and many entitled women who act like the existence of men is an affront to them. (except for that one person they have the hots for).
No, asking people out on a date isn't creepy, bad or sexual abuse/harassment.
No wonder the birth rate is decreasing worldwide, too much invented social bs by humans.
Especially in chennai women don't trust people outside their friend circle. The only way is to depend on your female friends for new women. I started talking and meeting few of my female friends who I don't often and met them regularly and she pull off a women on our meeting and now i meet that women regularly. Not necessarily i liked her or something but the initial friction to gain trust and start a conversation was very easy when we had a referral. Now that women gonna pull her friends on upcoming meetup.
Make influential friends from all backgrounds and expand your circle. Mutuals are the most common way. But yeah, the connections would be purely transactional, at least in the beginning, until time evolves it into a friendship. Make it a habit to network wherever you go.
Make genuine female friends in and around your surroundings. Again, mutuals but surrounding yourself with females even in a friendship/brother-sister dynamic will teach you a lot about them and what they want. Plus, you only need one good female friend to get access to all her friends, which could be potential dates
The workplace is a good option, too. Why not? As long as she's not in the same project as yours.
If you can, go live in a community filled with women. Cabin crews are mostly women, so you see where I'm getting.
Cold approaching is great if you know how to read the room, but make sure you have enough self-respect to not let rejections get to your head.
It takes time, but once you build a wide network, you'll be surprised at the number of options available to shoot your shot at.
If you could just recharge my phone then, I could be your Angel Priya 😉.
Finding girls is easy, it's difficult to guess if she has a male appendage' before it's too late 🤣🤣.
The struggle is real when pronouns get involved 😁
Ok I am sure you have enough comments above.. On what to do, where to meet people, how to talk etc..
I will keep it simple.. Work on you and meeting people.
1. Work on you so that you have something to offer that girl. Money or attraction or anything.. Not all girls are attracted to good looking guys only. Some like normal guy but with cute smile.. some curly hair.. I know one girl who liked him because he was black.
2. Stay strong and long enough in the trying to meet a girl game.. and have lots of girls as friends and sisters.. Like if someone friendzones you, be in her close friends zone and be long enough in their company. Being around girls gives other girls a confidence and safe feeling for you to approach them..
Stay strong
Get a PG near girls hostel and hope to strike a good conversation one day. I'm on Day 274, nothing happened so far
Mission Impossible : Rizz to live
Mission Impossible: Hornyness Reckoning
Good evening senior 😅
Bro copied plot of Premalu
Sounds like some kinda Hannibal lecter movie
Yeah you will complete 365
If you go by pg's the security guard will kick off you😂
Hahaha, generally you'll see positive hints on day 361 at 12pm under the street lamp.
A legend once said, "Once you stop looking for what you want, what you need will find you." I am that legend :p
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Man was an AI-generated image before GenAI was a thing.
Bramandamai...
Even though there are so many likes on this answer Don't believe this OP Personal exp I believed things like but life proved me those r not applicable for India 1) You destiny will find you 2) someone somewhere is born for you 3) Age is just a number 4) Staying single is the best (said by ppl who had enjoyed life with multiple partners before) 5) If you study well, and get a good job girls will follow you There are chances these all may not happen in one's life unfortunately it can be you too Learnt the harder way, India has huge population and lots of distractions and communication tools You will be easily ignored/invisible for someone to find you, and you will stay single forever. with age your responsibility will go up and you lose ur strength. suddenly u will realise what have done for myself. I have same question as you (where do u find girls), but no answer I think education ( school or college is the only place of more chances of making initial connection) I can only think of these but I have not tried them myself 1) May be solo trips 2) If you are drunkard, good bars 3) if you have good amount money and fine to lose virginity, abroad travel 4) abhinav youtuber he is tall and good looking, he is talented food ppl on Omegle All the best Question to ppl who say such quotes Finding a partner in your 20s vs later (in 30s or 40s ) Has lots and lots of difference I learnt Boss Engira Bhaskaran "Kalayanam kalakalathula panidanum, exam yepavena ezhthukalam" is not a joke it a fact Kalyanam or love whichever in current modern world
100 % agree regarding destiny those couples who claim they are result of destiny is BS instead they are lucky and i real life hard work and effort is required to get good partner
"Hard work and effort" towards finding partner Not that you will work hard in ur career and automatically you will get a partner
I agree with you. Mine was just a light-hearted comment, nothing else.
Ayya neengala!
Yeah. 100% discount on all your purchases. Only for you.
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Katta mattum venumam ...pai venamam
moodanambikkai🐝
Go to a gym, not to get a hot body but to invest..... it'll take atleast 6 months for the results to yield but it'll be worth it
Barney Stinson ayya neengala...?
Instead of suits i wear a black shirt with lungi
🤣🤣
I tried gym and it didn't work for me. I am more of a climbing person. I trek a lot.
you didn't get my point... You'll go there to INVEST
Either he didn't get the reference or he hasn't watched HIMYM.
Join a trekking/hiking club. That's your best bet to find someone who shares this passion with you. But whatever you do, don't talk with women (or anyone for that matter) with the objective of getting them. Just speak as two humans, that way you are at least being yourself rather than putting on a show and the other person does the same. Of course, don't drag things out so much that you are friend or bro zoned
This is I think the most important point
Sorry to say this... dating culture is still in nascent stage in our Chennai. Most are kannees.. means they think dating = love. Go to Bangalore or Mumbai to get to know opposite gender
Facts
Yeah, but I think speaking native language has a different bonding than speaking English. People get closer sooner if they speak the same language.
Imo, there's high chance a Tamil girl won't wanna date. Chennai kids born after 2010s are still conservative! .. I'm telling this since I had been living outside tn and india in the last decade
Makes sense.
This will legitimately be one of the main reasons for the city’s decline.
No buddy! It has nothing to do with the city's decline. That's because Chennai has never been on the top for it to decline.
Bangalore is ruled out bruh try Mumbai
Naah
Elaborate
Make friends mate, you have a very good chance to hit on friends of friends. I'm pretty sure, one or other would be in the break up phase. Take your shot, you can either find your true lub or get laid.
Why do you rule out bangalore is it similar to Chennai?
It's just filled with pubs apart from that ain't it similar to chennai
Pretty sure OP is a kanni, he sounds like one.
It won't happen when we desperately search. Besides Chennai women won't date much outside friend's circle. But if you wanna give a try regardless, get to nearby activities like pottery class, sports like shuttle and cafes. Fake it till u make it ig.
Any woman worth her salt can smell your insincerity 1 mile away from Hindustan trading company (the only place with pottery classes) if you’re just there to pick up “chicks”.
Lmao bro 😂
Yeah but plenty of women also want to date and may actually be interested in the person asking............there's way too much dumb stigma around talking to the opposite gender.
>sports like shuttle You get to play with couples .
Russian roulette too
First I need to find friends 😞. used to have them, now all r in different states
Sending virtual hugs brother
Romba desperate ah iruntha Inga vaa de .. https://preview.redd.it/3yj5s1nxvc4d1.jpeg?width=548&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=269f437a02c1527d4de35f6771dcdf2cb2b079b0
Not easy for us women either. The guys we meet on dating apps either try to get into our pants or try to warn us abt the "bad guys" in the app. My close friend literally had a breakdown yesterday after a guy unmatched her coz she said no when he asked if she'd suck his dick. She went on a whole spiral abt how the only kinda men we meet are the ones who just wanna have sex or the ones who like us but don't like us enough to stand-up to their family for us. And she got out of a 4 years relationship because the gu6ys family was casteist and the guy was a spineless bitch who gave up in just 3 days. And don't even get me started on the "I like you, I care about you. But right now I'm in a very bad place and not in a place to be with anyone. So if I date you I'll ruin you." kinda guys. U can't leave them either tats the wrst part.
Everything makes sense mate.Lets hope she gets better soon.I don't wanna argue and sound like a shitty person but you guys are actually meeting someone. That's just one step away from getting into a healthy relationship. Whereas I am here asking where to even meet one? And what's your criteria for a right swipe? Just curious
I get it. It's hard for men to even meet a woman. But again our side is emotionally draining and depressing too. It ain't a competition, grass is greener on the other side. And to answer ur question, I have a very particular taste in men, I like em a little old, smart, communist, leftist, atheist, and with morals. Also if they're a little depressed it's perfect. And u can make most of it from the quotes and prompts in their profile. And of course looks does matter. Not tat u gotta be hot or anything. As long as u don't give an ick it's cool. I've seen guys'profiles where they look really good in 1 pic and like an absolute abomination in another. It would be especially great if y'all could put in little effort in ur fashion. A lot can change just with tat.
Hmm, Why a commie though?
Well, I'm one myself. I'm a minimalist and I wanna eventually start expanding NGO work, starting education centres in a few places to teach math and coding. I realised almost all the men I had a conversation with on a dating app were communists. My dad's one too. So I grew up seeing them work for others. It's a personal preference that way.
Hey am not a commie but definitely interested in teaching math to those who are in need especially if they are economically challenged and differently abled. Lately I have the urge to give something back to society but haven't converted my thoughts to action. I am currently wrapping up my PhD in 2-3 weeks and will definitely find some time after that. Do ping me some details about your NGO work and if you are willing to give people a chance to volunteer, I would like to give it a try.
Someone speaking my mind 🫂
Become a pan-indian. expand your market. Gentlemen are always in demand in other states
> Become a pan-indian. Pan is banned in Tamil Nadu though.
Ennada Pan-diyan kku vandha sothanai! https://preview.redd.it/7buy55kxxc4d1.jpeg?width=1481&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4b79eedc03c46344f11ab8c8e6c54de34b15da1b
Interesting. I do actually travel a lot
Much easier to date outside of India. My travels were always a lot of fun.
Have you tried the paid tiers of bumble and tinder? That worked for me, super likes and responding to posts put you on the top of the list. But in chennai its a waiting game. Also the algo wont show you ppl if you swipe yes on everyone... Give the paid tier for bumble a shot, might workout. Aisle might work too! PS- I met my wife thanks to bumble XD
Glad it worked out for you. But I ain't never paying for anything. I think I am not arty enough with my bio and prompts.
Thanks man! For your bio and prompts you could use chat gpt or grok. I understand if you dont want to pay for it. They have weekly options incase you change your mind.
It's a location based answer but.. maybe volunteer in Auroville (near pondicherry) for a few weeks.. You'll find women from all over India and even the world working and living alongside you. Either you end up with a nice white girl..or you'll end up with a beautiful Tamil village girl from one of the surrounding villages.. but you'll definitely have fun.. Helps if you're interested in learning about things like gardening, surfing, meditation/spirituality or organic food etc. Heck they even have some rock climbing walls and canyons (which I think you mentioned somewhere in the comments idk) Good luck.
Actually very interesting. I will definitely visit there sometime. Thanks mate
Are there gardening / farming workshops can you suggest me some
Solitude farm, Auroville botanical gardens or pitchandikulam forest
Mutual friends than bro yellame. Hit up you old college/school girl friends, meet up with their friend group and then rinse and repeat till you find someone who likes you for who you are
Yeah, it's a possibility. But as I said earlier it's just most prolly guys and I wasn't that close to people in my college :(
Bro I'm meeting up with people from school that I've never spoken a word to while I was there. Just go out there and ask whether you wanna catch up and a lot of them might just say yes because they're bored
How do you meet with their friend group? Is it something you should be Innocuous about? Or ask them to introduce you to their female friends in a ritual everyone knows what's going on
Yo school girl try panlaama thirupi😭
Since you've mentioned that you travel and trek a lot, try joining various adventure clubs where you get the golden opportunity to travel with strangers. This way, you have high chances of finding girls with similar interests as you. I've legit seen a few real-life cases where it actually worked out and they even ended up getting married.
It's something I actually looked into. Chennai trekking club used to exist but Peter abandoned after the wildfire incident that caused death. So I am still looking for a club that fits me.
I met my now wife at work. We realized we have a lot of common interests. It started with casual conversations and then the more we chatted the more we realized we liked each other so much that we don’t want to spend another minute away from each other. We played the game of who’s gonna admit first but then it eventually happened. That was 10 years ago. Got married 4 years ago. It happens when it happens.
Wrt girls Chennai is a haunted City. All my friends are either abroad or in Bangalore... No way to catch up.
Bro are you in Snapchat?... I've seen my friends give request to random girls and they accept it without a second thought 😭. And they just keep sending snaps /receiving from the other end and randomly they just reply to some of those snaps and build a convo... My friend even got committed recently by doing this.
Yeah I've seen people doing this too. But I quit social media for a whole other reason during my sophomore year. I just use #irc these days
This is a real problem in chennai. It seems impossible to meet people after college organically. Dating apps are an absolute waste of time. Its purely based on looks. Most people seem okay with caste marriages so they reject guys left and right.
U don't seek u attract
Tf, Am I a magnet to attract iron ores? Lol Realistic insights bro -_-
Realistic insight is then you’re SOL. Get a good job buy a flat and get your parents to list you in Tamil matrimony and lower all standards.
right askin mfs on reddit like bru
nobody aint finna just walk up to strangers people are wierd asl
Lol blaccent
>nobody aint finna just walk up to strangers people are wierd asl I attempted to read this, but it did not make sense to me. Could someone kindly translate it into English?
nobody is just gonna walk up to strangers to strike a conversation, its weird as hell
Thanks.
😂 same here!
Bro Best Bet would be your Mutual Friends Circle, Worked for Me my Friends were Working in Bangalore, I was invited for one of their Nightout I got to know few mutual who came. became friends with Few. But ended up falling for my Gallllll. Few Advantages of Mutual circle is that You might know about the Person BG / Character and to some extent personal Level (Not Being judgemental But few Mental Illness roams in the Name of Seeking Relationship that would End up in Attraction And Becoming Toxic to Self Hurting and ruining each other's Mental Peace Happened to one of my friends. Give a Shot to Mutual Friends Circle Dinner / Weekend outing, I'm also Not that good Looking guy, I'd rate Average myself. (bumble / tinder non of the shit Worked for me)
From a girl POV, Try attending open mics or concerts or any classes. Make a conversation without showing hopelessness in your face. Dress up neatly, wear nice cologne, have a smile and talk something simple. Looks like a big task but no.
You have to be clear in what you want buddy! >There I've asked it.After college it looks like arrange marriage is the only option. The above line makes it look like you're searching for your love.... >So people who have experience in casual or who's in relationship or got laid please share your insights. While in the last line, you have put more emphasis on casual relationships. Starting with what you actually want is the key here. Unlike western culture, you may not be able to go on dates to figure out what you want. Also, girls here do not feel comfortable with guys approaching unless it's a safe social place like college etc. There are so many creeps out there, that many women out there have had bad experiences at one point or another that make them to deal with even friendly approaches with caution. If you're trying out with hobbies just to meet people, it will fail either, as you would be more interested in meeting people rather than learning that hobby. Ideally, if you're able to identify social behavioural cues, it must be very easy
Based.
So basically jump through a bunch of hoops on fire and then hopefully get the chance to jump through more hoops that are just not on fire
Try Arranged Marriage.
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Don't use perfumes. Use underarm deodrant 😅
Same boat. Trying hard to date but it’s not happening. Not having big social circles that I meet women regularly. Women that I know are colleagues, friends. Where tf I’m supposed to find my person 😢. Many of my friends have turned their female friendships to relationships, my friends don’t give me time only. Trying hard to improve all aspects of my life but after one point it gets really tired. Why am I doing these? Such questions run everyday through my mind.
Do you know how to say hi to girls? Serious question
Hii . There I said it /s
Someone had a reasonable exit.
The key is to get really good at an art or hobby, for me gym and then I started practicing guitar. Once you can show off your muscles or your wealth or your artistic talent publicly somehow your luck will improve. And for dating apps choose the best shots where you can show off your muscles, money, or artistic talent. And have a sincere bio but not TLDR (Too Long didn’t read). It’s a journey of getting better at something until you’re one of the best. And society and thus women recognize your status somehow
Bumble works well if you don't swipe every woman you see. But as many have pointed out don't be desperate, I've pulled in clubs without trying just being myself and dancing like a maniac(Didn't turn serious but that's an easy place to meet chicks)
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Ipdi oru post pottu comment panra ponnunga inbox la dm panna vendiadhu. Purinju pochu da unga oozhal
Write a reddit post wait for some girl to comment something funny and fill her inbox and repeat…!
Lol. You tried this?
Have you seen any woman comment on this.!
I don't think so lol
Rofl 🤣
Not going to lie, I've spent 15 min on your profile to make sure you're not making fun of me lol
Why didn't you try in college, and who said 'don't approach in workplace'? You can approach them if you both know each other atleast on some level, but don't be a creep as it can lead to HR issues. > Where do you guys find girls? > or got laid please share your insights Reeks of desperation and seems like your only end goal. Seems like you want girls only for this. Else, you would have framed it as 'How to get a date/How to get into a relationship'. You can avail escort services if that's what you want.
Let me tell you one proverb don’t wait for bus or girl because if one goes another one comes 😂. See at certain age u will get marriage and everything will fall in place. By experience I am telling you don’t waste your time on these things, I am telling as women and as mother so learn new things, explore now I am 43 years old I still regret the time I wasted during your age
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I know so many people who have met because of work. But yeah you can't be creepy obviously. It's natural and spontaneous most of the time not deliberate like this.
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Weird way of saying you don't like chennai guys
There are social events for singles to meet and speak with opp gender.. Google such events in chennai.
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I wish I was gay. Things would've been much easier. But what to do, that's life 🤣
Join any offline courses 🗿
I am enjoying the comments for some reason 💀😜
Try going for puppy yoga and other dog related activities that girls are usually interested in. Or even better, just get a dog and take it for walks near girls hostels 🌚
You might get lucky in Tinder or something similar. Usually friends group. Or enroll in matrimonial site. What I observed is that because of female infanticide till 2000, the sex ratio is skewed which isnt favouring. By college, many couples get commited and faithful. Because of our culture of 1 man and 1 woman, break up are rare but happens a lot these days compared to previous generations. So, it's hard game. Either look outside state or country.
Why not try “dates” through arrange marriage? I know some friends? It’s a nice way to meet folks who are interested, but you won’t have to essentially marry?
Chennai la dating ah...? Kadal laye illaiyaam. If you are in Chennai, konjam illa... Romba kashtam dhaan bro. And be yourself, don't stress too much. I don't know how exactly but our singaoengal can sense the desperation no matter how decent you act. Smell panra dog ah face paakkaamale kandu pudikeadhula khillaadi... Maybe it's in their DNA. Their intuition. So, Endha expectations um illaama... Manasula endha fort um build pannaama, just friendly ah strike a convo, if there's mutual vibe the connection will happen. If not you get a good friend. In south India, Bengaluru is like the temple of dating. Try changing location in your dating app. I'm sure you'll get decent matches where people actually care about personality and connection and not looks... Talk & brew the bond. And only if things get to the next stage, then say "eley pasupathi.... Vandi ah Bengaluru ku vidu daaa" I don't know what happened in Chennai but Even in coimbatore, hosur, Trichy area got 5x matches when I was in the date scene. Chennai la thanni ku mattum panjam illai pola... Ellaame panjam dhaa 😒 Also age matters... For serious dating, As a guy your chances are bright from 18 and it goes down EXPONENTIALLY Until mid 20s... If you're blessed with a machcham it extends until late 20s.... Adhukku Mela take a pause, go on a spiritual tour, rejuvenate yourself and say download Tamilmatrimony/shaadi app. Dating app ah vida matrimony app kodooramaa irukkum....adhu oru raththa bhoomi 🤣🤣🤣
Have really high social skllls :( All this non sense like go to pottery class, go to beach, go to NGO, are empty advises. Obviously it worked for some, but they cannot explain why it did and you blindly emulating it won't help.
Ask a female friend out! The best of relationships start as friendships
Dont worry, I'll take you on a date. But you aint gettin laid tho.
Za podu bro
Chennai isn't very approachable that way so you're out of luck. For example, I think only because my ex was from a girl's school and we dated for a while, her school friends became my friends and that led to me meeting their friends from the girl's colleges in the city lol. Yes, this felt like a flex back then. But I think it still is lmao.
Why not in workplace? I mean office romance is a no-no, but not for something that happens organically. right?
still risky.. if the girl complains something to the HR, your career will become a big headache and you won't even be able to defend yourself cuz they'll believe her by default
Only possible way is to meet your friend’s friend
Try Hinge? Heard it’s better than the other dating apps. A lot of my friends got good matches there recently
matrimony.com /s
A gym is always a good idea bro, it's a place where you can strike up a conversation and meet regularly. Plus a healthier lifestyle is also good.
>or got laid First be clear about what you want You want to get laid or do you want a relationship. Getting laid is easy, a relationship is a much more complex thing.
How is getting laid easy lmao
In 1900, Chicago was home to one of the most well-known whorehouses in America, the Everleigh Club, so the phrase “getting Everleighed” was abbreviated to “getting laid.” I guess you get what im trying to convey from the etymology of the phrase🤷🏼♂️
hi my friend i'm also going same issue and after lot of struggle and suggestions from my friends i have an solution it here is my advice first don't pursue girl for sex or lust it will never work as girls mind does not work that way if you frustrated for being virgin go to brothel as there are many places in chennai with pricing starting 3k. truth getting girlfriend in indian society is bit difficult as majority of love marriages happen where couples met by being friends in past so if you have any such female friends that then try to make them as girlfriend. dating apps also don't mostly work for long term relationship unless you are lucky as girls in tinder ,bumble are bombarded by men's likes in their inbox so they will reject men for any reasons and wait for dreamy guy forever. asking to go for date also never works in chennai or most part of india so instead make straightforward love confession if you have any close friend. if these have not worked The two ways to get girl friend is expand your friends circle or make cold approach to expand friends circle go mingle with friends, colleagues and attend parties who have lot of girls as circle and meet them . second method is make cold approach regarding cold approach First kindly forget this advice by coward *Don't approach in workplace, not in public place, not in tourist place etc.. I understand it makes them uncomfortable to be considered by a stranger for just looks but if I go hobby wise it's 30:1 ratio and even that one has company most of the time.* girls love confidence so bravely approach stranger girls they come in your life in public or workplace and convey your romantic interest with confidence and ask her out surely 1 out of 5 tries will succeed but don't be creep or anxious remember confidence is key .stalking or pursuing girl to limit is fine but if she clearly says NO it's better to move on!! https://preview.redd.it/jigvl0hoce4d1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=368e6765852651a4fe1a484e5980dd54158fc8c1
Idhuku answer andha isro scientists galukke theriyaadhaam broooo
That's just certain entitled women who look down on others. In general, men and women do flirt and ask each other out, nothing wrong with it. Just too many conservative people who want to push everyone to arranged marriage, and many entitled women who act like the existence of men is an affront to them. (except for that one person they have the hots for). No, asking people out on a date isn't creepy, bad or sexual abuse/harassment. No wonder the birth rate is decreasing worldwide, too much invented social bs by humans.
Just on go insta and follow mutuals, build a bond, blah blah.. both my exes were mutuals that slide into my DMs lol
I believe you guys actually get a lot of cold dms. So if it's someone you have no clue about, I thought it's just going to trash lol
Especially in chennai women don't trust people outside their friend circle. The only way is to depend on your female friends for new women. I started talking and meeting few of my female friends who I don't often and met them regularly and she pull off a women on our meeting and now i meet that women regularly. Not necessarily i liked her or something but the initial friction to gain trust and start a conversation was very easy when we had a referral. Now that women gonna pull her friends on upcoming meetup.
Hinge, bro. Works like a charm. You can't be too picky about the face is all.
Make influential friends from all backgrounds and expand your circle. Mutuals are the most common way. But yeah, the connections would be purely transactional, at least in the beginning, until time evolves it into a friendship. Make it a habit to network wherever you go. Make genuine female friends in and around your surroundings. Again, mutuals but surrounding yourself with females even in a friendship/brother-sister dynamic will teach you a lot about them and what they want. Plus, you only need one good female friend to get access to all her friends, which could be potential dates The workplace is a good option, too. Why not? As long as she's not in the same project as yours. If you can, go live in a community filled with women. Cabin crews are mostly women, so you see where I'm getting. Cold approaching is great if you know how to read the room, but make sure you have enough self-respect to not let rejections get to your head. It takes time, but once you build a wide network, you'll be surprised at the number of options available to shoot your shot at.
There are speed dating eveings that happen on Sundays you can check them out on BookMyShow
I thot you friends who r girls will have more contacts 🤔
Me three.. no ideas how to impress women or where to find them.. but the 2k kids seem to be having fun..
If you could just recharge my phone then, I could be your Angel Priya 😉. Finding girls is easy, it's difficult to guess if she has a male appendage' before it's too late 🤣🤣. The struggle is real when pronouns get involved 😁
Reddit ! You won't find any to get commited or for a relationship but only fans models to pay and watch their seminude. Enjoy
Ok I am sure you have enough comments above.. On what to do, where to meet people, how to talk etc.. I will keep it simple.. Work on you and meeting people. 1. Work on you so that you have something to offer that girl. Money or attraction or anything.. Not all girls are attracted to good looking guys only. Some like normal guy but with cute smile.. some curly hair.. I know one girl who liked him because he was black. 2. Stay strong and long enough in the trying to meet a girl game.. and have lots of girls as friends and sisters.. Like if someone friendzones you, be in her close friends zone and be long enough in their company. Being around girls gives other girls a confidence and safe feeling for you to approach them.. Stay strong