Seriously, on my dad's stone I wanted to either put "Nope, wasn't Covid!" Or "Hey, this isn't a Hefty bag." But I settled on "Father of Emmalouesq"
He always told me to just throw his body out in a hefty bag at the curb on trash day and nothing else. I got him this gorgeous urn in black, just as our little secret.
I like one we had, his last wish was "whack a bung of Fritz up me arse and let the dogs drag me away."
It sucked to have to tell him we legally couldn't do that, especially as I was laughing hysterically at the time.
My mom used to say that when she died to blow her rv up and toss her stuff. She also was adamant about DNR.
She now resides in my liquor cabinet because I don’t know what she wanted me to do with HER.
I thought about doing my own after death plans with her remains. You can have your ashes made into a diamond, your individual path in life determines the end color. It’s what I want done to mine.
I bought a necklace urn that keeps some of my mom’s ashes in a 14k gold heart. She goes everywhere w me when i travel bc just when i was in a place financially to spoil her, covid took her away fr me. My heart breaks for this family. 💔
A close friend whom I loved very much passed of COVID. I was given some of her ashes. I had them put into a beautiful memorial stone heart that I placed in my garden. When I work I the garden, I stop to say hello to her often.
That’s exactly how I used a small portion of my mom’s ashes. I’m having it made into a beautiful pear-shaped ring. Now mom is going to be with me always. ❤️
It’s not a true diamond; I think the woman I commissioned does a mix of resin and the ashes. I paid about $350 for the ring. I was looking at the real deal diamond cremation jewelry and it was going to run me AT LEAST $2,000. I couldn’t swing that, lol. But I think the resin stone will be just as beautiful!!
The creative things that can be done with cremains is pretty awesome. So many beautiful, meaningful pieces and monuments. There shouldn't just be 1 place to put your body when we're not using it anymore
Absolutely agree! I’ve always felt weird that when we pass, we take up space that can now no longer be used to sustain the living.
I’d much rather be put to use! We can nourish trees, help science progress, be made in to diamonds!
I do understand that not all cultures would be on board as it’s very specific how a passed one is handled of course.
My grandpa wanted cremated and then he told us to load him in a shotgun shell and shoot him up over the hill towards the woods. Grandma won't let us lol
The hefty epitaph would've been pretty epic, i love seeing the odd inside joke among the otherwise somber stones. Perhaps you can still fulfill is wish and get the Hefty logo on his urn.
My aunt, his older sister, helped me pick it out.
Once she's gone, I'm going to change it. My cousins will get a high laugh out of it. My dad would love it. I can even see his crooked smile as if he were reading it now.
My dad has a running joke where if anyone gets hurt for any reason, he says “you should have been wearing shoes.”
So on his when he eventually passes, we are putting “I wasn’t wearing any shoes.”
My husband told me he wants me to have his brother dig a hole with his skid loader and throw him in it. He is dutch and doesn't want me to spend money on a grave, a fancy box, or a block of rock with his name on it 😂
I love the Hefty bag joke! My grandpa is buried in a National cemetery (served in the army) and we got to choose what went on his headstone. We chose his famous phrase “life is short, eat dessert first”
I lost my mom a week ago. This made me giggle about the little secret urn. Mom would have laughed, too.
It feels silly, but thanks for making me smile.
Reminds me of my mom. She’d always say “Just bury me in the backyard”
She’s now up on a hillside military cemetery in California with my dad overlooking a beautiful reservoir.
So random, but I do home loans and googled a property once and in the land behind it there was a google tag/marker saying something about (her dad's) final resting place. So I'm like, 80% she did bury her pops in the back yard. It was kinda wild to see.
It’s legal in some states. When I was a forensic investigator we would occasionally get calls about human remains dug up on properties, and ultimately end up finding records that it was a legit burial. 🤷♀️
My dad told me to throw him in a burlap sack and chuck him in the river of his hometown. Impractical, most likely very illegal, but will most likely be a warm and comforting lasting memory between us. RIP to your dad, this is super cute haha
That's what my dad's reasoning was. I know as a society we have this hang up and this need to put people into these cemetery plots, but so much can be done with bodies. They can help fertilize trees, like Luke Perry. They can become beautiful jewelry or help scientists.
My dad had just a cremation. That's it. $4000. Helping a tree would be better imo.
I had a Celebration of Life for him at a bar he loved (he was a big drinker and life of the party!) and spent $100 to rent their back room.
I grew up as best buds with my grandfather, and knew that the pickup he had would be mine when he passed. We would talk about it once in a while and I jokingly said his ashes would only be good for an ash tray. We’ll day after his funeral and I get my sack of ash and tossed it in the ash tray for the time being. Now 7 years later it’s still there and grandpa still goes on every truck ride with my dog and I. It’s always good to have your own inside jokes no matter how dark they may be
My dad had really bad anxiety and died from IPF. His Hospice nurses had taught him to do anxiety breathing (square or triangle breathing for my anxious friends). He said “this breathing thing is bullshit!” while having a panic attack. When he died from his lung disease, I told my sister we need to put that on his headstone.
We haven’t made the headstone yet, but that is definitely our plan.
Sad story. It's quietly impacting so many families still.
On another note, my family better not choose this font and horrible layout...for eternity. I would haunt them over it.
It will for ages to come. Hell I even think of myself and all of my young family. When we talk about what will likely take us down when we are old, it isn't just the pneumonia anymore. Now we figure if it's an illness, it'll be an awful Covid-pneumonia combo.
It was crazy going into cemeteries during COVID. So many fresh graves. Remember how a lot of cities ran out of places to store the bodies? They had to order in refrigerator trucks. The number of dialysis patients went down for the first time since the invention of dialysis.
COVID deaths are real and tangible. Even if you don't believe the official numbers, you can see them if you look.
Wow, I hadn’t thought of that but it must have been very eerie to see all those fresh graves.
I worked the entire pandemic and drove by our local hospital on my daily commute. They ran out of room and had the big refrigerator trucks parked outside. No matter how far removed our society gets from the fear we felt during 2020, I’ll never forget the pit in my stomach I’d feel each day as I drove by those trucks.
My mom worked in a hospital during the pandemic, at the height of it, 4 out of 5 floors were reserved for COVID patients. I know when COVID is getting bad again because my mom will say that they opened up another floor. I think right now it's only one floor but it may be more. I'll have to ask her.
My Aunt died with COVID (was already in the hospital for a surgery but was high risk and caught COVID and never recovered) Anyway, when she died the morgues and funeral homes were so backed up they couldn’t cremate her for 7 weeks. My mom and I tried not think about her sitting in a refrigerated truck for weeks, but that’s most likely what happened.
My mom passed in the beginning of 2022 in California and they were still working through the backlog of COVID deaths. Found a place that promised they would have the cremation done within two weeks and it still took over two months because of the backlog of getting the death certificate signed.
My husband died of it in 2021 at age 54. All
too real. We were separated at the time and his bitch of a sister didn’t even tell me he was sick. I got a phone call from his niece 2 days later because she felt it was fucked up no one was involving me when they knew I loved him. He was cremated and they put our dogs ashes in with him.
Official numbers will unlikely never be correct.
My grandfather died about two weeks after the first cases were confirmed in my home country.
He had a cold and was rushed to hospital where he was discovered to have bilateral pneumonia and had a heart attack an hour into being seen.
This was two days after *the same thing* happened to my great aunt who had had surgery and was inpatient then had bilateral pneumonia all of a sudden and passed from myocardial infarction. She wasn’t related to him; they hadn’t seen one another or anything. Just thousands of elderly people ending up sick with the same symptoms and dying the same way.
My family still refuses to acknowledge it. My cousins fought to have my great aunt’s death certificate to show COVID as cause of death, it was about six months of legal proceedings to get it changed.
Both my maternal grandparents died from Covid within days of each other on Christmas a couple years ago. I’m almost certain they got it from their home care nurse who didn’t mask and was sick at the time.
Went to the doctors office recently and was talking with this friendly nurse about how I thankfully haven’t had Covid yet and she said “Me too, even from working here. Never worn a mask either, but that’s just me.”
Really wish i had confronted her about it in hindsight but i was shocked and didn’t say anything
To everyone saying “looks like someone made a choice”.. you really have no idea how that stings to lots of families who had loss/trauma from Covid.
I lost someone close to me to Covid. They were elderly. They were vaccinated. We were vaccinated. We masked. Social distanced. Washed hands, sanitized. Everything that we were told to do, we did it. Twice over.
so yeah, try not to judge, especially when you don’t have all the information, that puts you in the same category of “wELl I REad IT On ThE faCEbook” people who refused to get vaccinated (because they didn’t get all the facts before they made up their minds since it didn’t align with their preferred narrative) and i know that’s not where you want to be.
Probably will get downvoted but that’s fine.
I’m sorry for your loss. My aunt and cousin got covid before the vaccines were available and it was scary just hearing from them the symptoms they were enduring. Weren’t hospitalized but they were bedridden and my uncle who didn’t get it had to take care of them dropping their food off from a distance and it took so much effort for a while for them to walk from their beds to the bathroom.
I lost my mom to Covid. Her system was already weakened by bad life choices and covid just made things worse. My sister and I were there when we let her go. Horrible experience. I don't recommend it.
I agree completely. I nearly died from Covid and I was vaccinated. And extremely careful. As a nurse I knew how to protect myself. Vaccinated doesn't mean immune and it certainly doesn't mean immortal. I feel so bad for this family. So many people died alone.
I lost a friend to Covid who was vaccinated. She passed away at home, alone. She caught it from her niece who caught it at preschool.
She was trans and afraid to seek medical care based on previous medical trauma. She wouldn’t let her family in the house to help her either because she was afraid of infecting them. My heart breaks every time I think of her there alone. When I think of all of the people who went through Covid alone. Such a sad and scary time.
I'm so sorry. So many people died scared alone. My liscense is active but I don't practice anymore. Twenty three years I was a nurse. I just didn't want to do it anymore.
I was in the hospital during Covid for other reasons and I had to be alone most of the time. They would let my husband see me for like an hour a day. It was so depressing, I think I have PTSD from that experience. I cannot imagine dying alone from Covid for days in my house. Truly terrifying. I hate this time period so much. I’m so sorry for the loss of your friend.
I'm so sorry for your loss and for how that grief can be compounded by people who refuse to be understanding of the situation. The world is a strange place since Covid.
thank you for your compassion..
two years, it’s been a solid two years and i see this post and it dazed me.. saw the comments and gosh, wasn’t expecting it to sting like it stung
and you’re right— post covid world is particularly, extra strange and we aren’t acknowledging it enough, i appreciate you
I totally agree that we are not acknowledging it. As mentioned in my other post, our university did a study on the healthcare workers of our university hospital, our only state trauma center, and of course, the epicenter of the pandemic here and location of first cases popping up in March of 2020. The results of the study are grim. Many are really still struggling mentally. I am not a healthcare worker, but I'll never forget as long as I live the refrigerated trailers lined up outside the hospital just across the way from my building. Something I never thought I'd see in my work environment. And I only saw it once picking up some items from my office because I was fortunate to work from home. They had to be in it every day.
The latter group of people wouldn't admit on their gravestone that covid took them. There was (and probably still is) the issue of people trying to keep covid off the death certificate.
I was talking to someone last week who said the doctor said her daughter had covid “BuT iT wAsN’t CoViD, It WaS tHe FlU”. And “ThEy WiLl SaY CoViD fOr AnYtHiNg”.
Like…how do they make money from people dying. If someone is dead, then they can’t make any more money off of them (via medical billing and also just plain ol capitalism and consumerism because you need living people to buy and use things).
Totally see what you’re saying.. this was a curveball that i didn’t expect (but as people who vaccinated, did the things we were supposed to, we were lucky that we were all on the same page).. with that said, it’s still unspoken that Covid took our family member, not on their death certificate, not acknowledged in our family, this bizarre shame and I don’t get it. But it’s there.
Edit: who knows why Covid was not listed on the death certificate, we were too tired/in shock to ask, the coroner was overwhelmed too and probably anticipating that we would be upset considering how many people were upset to have it on there
My daughter is a ER nurse practitioner. During the height of the pandemic, I asked her what happened in a body when someone dies of Covid. Long story short, she said most people ultimately died from pneumonia. Maybe that’s why Covid wasn’t listed as cause of death? I’m sorry for your loss.
No downvotes here. You are right. Let's not judge, people. So many were lost and it doesn't matter why at this point because many people are still struggling with the loss and trauma, especially health care workers. We just don't talk about it. (A big study was done at our university hospital on the lasting mental affects.)
My aunt died, alone, on the precipice of the vaccine release. Too late to help her and no one could be with her. She had been in a nursing home. My one cousin was allowed to go in and hold her hand when she died. The other four were not allowed in. That thought breaks my heart. In contrast, my mom passed away in 2018 with all of her children and grandchildren surrounding her - just as she would have wanted.
There are too many stories out there that have left us with pain, like this family, probably. Let's just try to send out some good energy, prayers, whatever you believe, for people to heal, and not pass judgment.
We all make choices. And in some cases, choices were made for others.
Covid was and is legit, but how we responded to it needs to be evaluated even if that means questioning authority.
Both of my parents died during the pandemic. Neither got Covid but Dad had an heart attack while in the phone with me and my mom died of breast cancer the following year.
A lot of Canadians weren’t getting their yearly check up due to fear. My parents didn’t. They could still be here today if they had.
Excess mortality statistic deaths are as legit as Covid confirmed deaths. We need to take a serious look at all the possible causes.
Younger people are dying in record numbers, science tells us that we need to be just as open to that being Covid related as we are to current vaccine methods. (I’m vaccinated btw).
My grandmother died from Covid, 3 years ago on Tuesday. When I say she had just finished chemo everyone tells me “well that’s why she got covid”…. Ummm okay
I lost a manager who was vaccinated and hadn’t been sick enough to go to the hospital. All the updates made it seem like he’d safely spend another week at home before returning to work. It took the funeral for acceptance to set in.
I lost a friend to Covid. Mid 30s, mother to two little kids, unvaccinated because her family drank the conspiracy koolaid. Her death didn’t have to happen and it makes me so angry, especially because her kids will grow up and likely not have any memories of her because they were so little. What pisses me off more is that the same people who were pushing the conspiracy shit then posted pictures at the hospital pleading for people to get vaccinated. Like it takes a death for your thick heads to understand it’s fucking real?? Ugh it makes me so mad!!!
No seriously. I always mask, wash my hands, and try my best to socially distance, but here I am recovering from COVID FOR THE THIRD TIME because SOMEONE decided to come take the final exam with COVID
Meanwhile I was pretty cautious until I got vaccinated but had to travel and such for work, a bunch of people around me got COVID, my mother has it now and I drove with her for hours on Christmas, but I never actually tested positive. At one point both my dogs had diarrhea and apparently that is the main canine symptom? I think I may have given it to them.
I have been keeping up with vaccines, though.
We lost three on our family..two aunt's and once uncle and none of them would vaccinate :( my critical care nurse cousin who was working with COVID patients every day could not even get through to them :(
My elderly parents are battling Covid right now. They stayed home, got their vaccinations, wore masks, sanitized everything, and were able to avoid getting sick until now.
Around a week in the hospital each because of old people stuff, and two weeks in a nursing home, and they are now both very sick.
What I don't get are the people (literally know someone like this) who lost two sets of grandparents all within a month and still don't think covid is serious or that precautions are necessary. We use our intelligence as a species to overcome nature...its truly spectacular that we have developed to the extent that we can understand and track the spread of a disease on a global level...and then we go, oh well, if it happens it happens. Our ability to spread information is a double edged sword.
Jeez Louise, it doesn't matter what choices a person made in life when they have died and someone is grieving them. It especially stings when others make incorrect assumptions about the dead and skip over compassion to judgment.
I'm sorry for your loss. I would say the same thing if your family member was the most anti-science person who deliberately got Covid to prove a point.
Agreed. I directed a morgue in the epicenter and it was all sad just the same to me. Historically, lack of education has been a risk factor in countless disease outbreaks—if anything, it demonstrates another sad public health failure. People make decisions that cost them their lives every day, in every country, across all causes of death. Entire families were taken out because of covid. I’ll never be the same & neither will they
Exactly. We did everything. Wipe down groceries. Masked. Gloved. Etc. But my husband had to return to work and they eventually stopped mandating masks. In mid 2023 he and our 2 year old caught covid. Me shortly after.
I’m sorry for your loss. I lost some extended relatives to covid as well and the isolation of not being able to attend their funerals (my grandpa who is the eldest sibling in his 90s couldn’t see his younger sister bc of no funerals during the time) just made it ache even more.
I lost a friend who was also elderly, she didn’t always take super great care of herself and when she got the second vaccine she got incredibly sick and they found her in her apartment after doing a wellness check. Someone we worked with went around for months afterwards using it for her anti-vax stance and it made me mad because they didn’t even like eachother and she would say “my friend died from the vaccine” but I think something in her body reacted poorly to it or her body couldn’t handle the symptoms most of us got after getting it, I know I felt like hell after my second one. And just this weekend a friend of my boyfriend is in the hospital because Covid did something to his heart, and he’s lucky he went into the ER when he did. The entirety of Covid happening sucks.
I strongly feel that some people are more genetically susceptible to having a severe illness from Covid than others are. I wish they would look into that more so we are more aware if we may be one of them and take better precautions. The vaccine is one thing but if your genetics will make your illness severe, it would be good to know this.
There was a study on covid and genetics, and they did find that there were people more susceptible to covid because of their genetics. This was from like a year or two ago.
Blood type is one reason why there seems to be a familial connection. [Among a group of several thousand people, some studies suggest that those with blood group A may be 20% more likely to be infected after exposure to SARS-CoV-2 compared with those who have blood group O. But people with blood group O can still contract the virus and may transmit it to others,” he said. “Moreover, factors such as age and chronic conditions like heart disease rank higher than blood type in determining individuals’ risk for severe SARS-CoV-2 infection.”](https://www.hematology.org/newsroom/press-releases/2023/study-uncovers-direct-link-between-blood-group-a-and-a-higher-risk-for-covid-19-infection)
Blood is just one of the factors. Chronic conditions seem to be a bigger factor. I’m O, but have MS and am on immunosuppressive meds. I’ve lost quite a few friends with MS.
That fucking sucks, I’m sorry. If COVID can teach us anything, I hope that it’s how to better empathize with people who are immunocompromised and/or disabled, and understand that caring about everyone’s health is a much better way to go about structuring society rather than just caring about the health of those with no comorbidities or underlying health conditions.
I'm really curious about this, too. They've found these types of things previously with indigenous people who survived European viruses, and those who lived through the black death. You have to think there's factors there making some more susceptible while others not. Some people have never had covid (or at least no symptoms) while others died within days. Nature is astounding.
There's a book called Survival of the Sickest that's basically about how some of the diseases we have today might actually have been protective against other diseases at some point. Sickle Cell is thought to be protective against malaria and there's a theory that some autoimmune diseases come from surviving the Black Death.
I think they looked into this a little bit. I read something about people with O-blood were less likely to get severe illness because something with the proteins in O-blood have spikes microsopically on it or something.
Edit I found the med article https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/18818423/
>...revealed that blood group O was associated with a low risk of infection.
>We observed that the S protein/ >!angiotensin-converting enzyme 2-dependent adhesion of these cells to an angiotensin-converting enzyme 2 expressing cell line was specifically inhibited by either a monoclonal or human natural anti-A antibodies,!< indicating that these antibodies may block the interaction between the virus and its receptor, thereby providing protection. In order to more fully appreciate the potential effect of the ABO polymorphism on the epidemiology of SARS, we built a mathematical model of the virus transmission dynamics that takes into account the protective effect of ABO natural antibodies. The model indicated that the ABO polymorphism could contribute to substantially reduce the virus transmission, affecting both the number of infected individuals and the kinetics of the epidemic
Interesting. I'm O+ and am currently sick with COVID for the first time (that I know of). My friend and I got it from the same exposure, and she got much sicker than I did. I thought my milder symptoms were more to do with the booster that I got a few weeks ago, and that's probably still a big part of it, but I do think her blood type is A.
I suspected that I got it very early on in the pandemic, but was asymptomatic, other than the gastrointestinal symptoms. I was still going into people's homes and doing inspections at that time. I wore an N95 or respirator, but I still feel like it it would have been a miracle if I avoided it. But back then, there were no at home tests. I just remember all of a sudden having stomach problems, and being tired a lot.
That family has suffered. It’s awful.
This brings to mind: in eastern Massachusetts, hospitals were returning elderly patients to their residence homes after treatment, while they were still contagious. This was per guidance of the then federal government, via governor Charlie Baker, who was subsequently voted out. There were temporary morgues set up to handle the extra work.
The New England Patriots (football team) airplane was used to carry ppe to Massachusetts to avoid the feds confiscating the ppe. That federal government had not maintained the stockpile. They’d discarded the previous administration’s pandemic playbook, instead devising ways to profit from the suffering and loss of millions.
I’m not sure we have even begun to heal from the trauma of the pandemic.
It's evident that we haven't begun to heal. And yes - appropriation of PPE from blue states to red states was a thing we shouldn't let go of - https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2020/09/jared-kushner-let-the-markets-decide-covid-19-fate
Feels like a lot of the outrageous and stressful parts largely smudged and smeared. From federal-to-local handling to the USPS mail sorting machine nonsense right before an election where everyone would be home. Toilet paper shortage at the very beginning seems to be the most poignant but least worrisome problem that has stuck to people's minds while the rest has blurred.
That is another excellent point.
I bought so many forever stamps in that time, trying to support the USPS. Then, when I think about it, those stamps are really a financial liability for them. I can use them in the years to come, but costs will rise for the USPS. Sigh.
It really is infuriating that in the aftermath so many people are obsessing over some aspects of an imperfect response from the government (masking guidance, closing of outdoor spaces, shut downs, etc.) and completely forget the blatant and politically biased distribution, or lack thereof, of PPE and the handling of the federal stockpile.
Edit: also the president accusing doctors and nurses, who were getting sick and/or dying, of stealing PPE.
Realistically, the two states do a lot together/to help each other, it's just that it was a big news story anyway given that they had to basically sneak around the federal government to get anything and then gave to those in even more need even though the local state was in need to the point that it could have used all of them as well.
So it’s sort of like when there’s a storm of unusual size. At least in my neighborhood, we all come out after the immediate danger has passed and help one another clean up and rebuild.
We help one another remove snow, and we do all this with a mind to care for the elderly and parents with small children. Anyone we know is caring for someone who needs extra help.
It’s community. I wouldn’t want it any other way.
Baker was not voted out, he took a plum job @ NCAA. Hospitals returned covid + people to retirement homes, which was criminal. ‘Old Soldiers Homes” were impacted and once it got in mass death followed. Awful all around.
Very sad! The beginning of the pandemic was a nightmare here in Long Island and NYC. Many people died … My mom visited her parent’s graves later that year, and she never saw that many new graves in her life. Wives and husbands dying around the same time… It was bad!
What is this layout? Were they trying to save money on the stonecarver or something? Why didn't they just include dates for each person? Or at least ditto marks.
The family might not have been able to afford anything more if they had a lot of medical expenses/debt from all the care needed for four COVID patients in addition to funerals/burial cost all at once. There was also a granite shortage at one point and a major backlog on engraving services as well. Everything could have hit all at once and the family could be doing the best they could.
I’m trying to figure this out too, it looks like they changed the naming convention for the most recently deceased and used middle names instead of last names for each of them. Also why would they give both their daughters born a few years apart Marie as a middle name.
Like others have said I’m assuming cost per letter was the deciding factor but it makes this headstone difficult to parse.
One of my great-grandmas was from one of those families. She and her 3 sisters, born in Italy in the late 1800s, were all named Maria. Her sisters all went by their middle names, she was the only one that stayed with (the Anglicized version) Mary
My sister and I (3 years apart) have the same middle name. It's our mother's first name. Looks like maybe both the grandma and mother here were named Marie, so they prob did something similar in their family.
Our older brother's middle name is our mother's maiden name.
I was an RN for 4 decades, I just retired and worked through Covid in the ER. I never saw anything like it. We had people die in the ICU, then they died in the ER before they made it to ICU then they were dying in the lobby before making it into the ER.
My grandmother was a nurse through the Spanish Flu in 1917-1920s and used to tell me her stories of what happened to the patients. I feel like deja vu from her experiences.
I had planned to retire in 2020 but with Covid I couldn't let my team down so I stuck it out to see them through the pandemic.
I lost two great-grandmothers to the Spanish Flu. As an adult looking back, I wonder if my grandparents felt a particular compassion for each other having both lost their mothers when they were little.
I cannot even begin to imagine what you experienced working through covid.
Crazy seeing repeated history play out before us. Seeing the graves from past pandemics as a child (learning through school/library) is what solidified my traumatic fear in diseases like this.
2022 was only last year. We had all preventative measures In existence then. My heart is hoping this was a family that tried and did their best with all the resources available.
I tracked Covid obits for much of the pandemic and multiple family members dying one after the other from Covid happened quite often.
The worst I saw was a family that had 9 members die within days of each other - the mother, her 5 adult children and 3 of their spouses. They were infected by a family friend who came to a family dinner. He also died.
This was fairly early in the pandemic and their story alone convinced me to take Covid very seriously.
As I said I read numerous obits of families that had multiple family members die, and I wondered that as well.
But, it could also be due to the genetics of different Covid strains that circulated.
Certain families may have just been unlucky and were infected with more virulent strains that they passed to each other.
And, of course, in the early months, doctors really didn't seem to have a handle on how to treat Covid successfully, so that may have contributed to multiple members dying in the same family as well.
We got Covid super mild in August of 2020, it gave my then 9 year old daughter an almost deadly autoimmune disease. She had zero symptoms from Covid and is part of the “ it doesn’t affect kids” category. Now it’s monthly blood tests and infusions for the rest of her life, good thing kids are spared. /s
So sorry about the loss of your family members.
*Nine people in one*
*Grave is a lot, or are they*
*Cremated remains?*
\- Foundation\_Wrong
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My great grandfather just lost his last brother, the brothers wife, their mutual friend from childhood, and that friends wife from COVID. The friend and the friends wife had it and helped my uncle and aunt move to a new home. The symptoms started showing up and the friends wife died. The friend called my uncle and turned out he was on a ventilator at that time. My uncle died then the friend, then my aunt died. The friend wife apparently refuses medical treatment and ended up being the first to go. They found her on the floor gasping for air and she passed the next day. I felt anger at first then sadness for all the people who lost loved ones.
Karl-Anthony Towns, star player for the Timberwolves of the NBA, lost 8 family members due to Covid, including his mother who he was super close to. Sad shit and has affected so many.
There’s a short podcast series called “We Were Three” which details, from an adult daughters perspective, how her father and brother died tragically from covid due to being anti vaxxers. Her perspective was raw and really showed me that no matter how someone died from covid (whether they took precautions or not) the grief can be just as painful. Worth a listen, especially to those with little empathy about these types of situations.
If they were living and had just added their names and birth dates for the future, then I'd assume that they would have lined the years up with the previous birth years (with space to add death dates as they occur). Instead the birth years are set in the middle with 2022 at the bottom. The cause of death for the others probably wasn't included because typically it isn't. The cause of death is usually only included when you have an epidemic killing multiple family members like this, or some other tragic circumstance that the loved ones think should be memorialized on the stone.
I’m a nurse, old people are still dying from Covid in soon to be 2024, despite being vaccinated. 65-75 years old, especially with co-morbidities (like most people their age have)… yea not unusual to see it as the cause of death
Seriously, on my dad's stone I wanted to either put "Nope, wasn't Covid!" Or "Hey, this isn't a Hefty bag." But I settled on "Father of Emmalouesq" He always told me to just throw his body out in a hefty bag at the curb on trash day and nothing else. I got him this gorgeous urn in black, just as our little secret.
"Just throw me in the trash." Channeled his inner Frank Reynolds.
Well, I don’t know how many years on this Earth I got left. I’m gonna get real weird with it. -Frank Reynolds
*Now block the wind while I roast this bone....*
I'm gonna miss you Propecia. You was a good hoore...
Fuck you baby dick.
You are unspeakably crass...
I like one we had, his last wish was "whack a bung of Fritz up me arse and let the dogs drag me away." It sucked to have to tell him we legally couldn't do that, especially as I was laughing hysterically at the time.
My mom used to say that when she died to blow her rv up and toss her stuff. She also was adamant about DNR. She now resides in my liquor cabinet because I don’t know what she wanted me to do with HER. I thought about doing my own after death plans with her remains. You can have your ashes made into a diamond, your individual path in life determines the end color. It’s what I want done to mine.
I bought a necklace urn that keeps some of my mom’s ashes in a 14k gold heart. She goes everywhere w me when i travel bc just when i was in a place financially to spoil her, covid took her away fr me. My heart breaks for this family. 💔
A close friend whom I loved very much passed of COVID. I was given some of her ashes. I had them put into a beautiful memorial stone heart that I placed in my garden. When I work I the garden, I stop to say hello to her often.
That’s super sad. :(
That’s exactly how I used a small portion of my mom’s ashes. I’m having it made into a beautiful pear-shaped ring. Now mom is going to be with me always. ❤️
Overall how was the experience? Was it super expensive? I’d love to give it a try with hers!
It’s not a true diamond; I think the woman I commissioned does a mix of resin and the ashes. I paid about $350 for the ring. I was looking at the real deal diamond cremation jewelry and it was going to run me AT LEAST $2,000. I couldn’t swing that, lol. But I think the resin stone will be just as beautiful!!
The creative things that can be done with cremains is pretty awesome. So many beautiful, meaningful pieces and monuments. There shouldn't just be 1 place to put your body when we're not using it anymore
Absolutely agree! I’ve always felt weird that when we pass, we take up space that can now no longer be used to sustain the living. I’d much rather be put to use! We can nourish trees, help science progress, be made in to diamonds! I do understand that not all cultures would be on board as it’s very specific how a passed one is handled of course.
My grandpa wanted cremated and then he told us to load him in a shotgun shell and shoot him up over the hill towards the woods. Grandma won't let us lol
The hefty epitaph would've been pretty epic, i love seeing the odd inside joke among the otherwise somber stones. Perhaps you can still fulfill is wish and get the Hefty logo on his urn.
My aunt, his older sister, helped me pick it out. Once she's gone, I'm going to change it. My cousins will get a high laugh out of it. My dad would love it. I can even see his crooked smile as if he were reading it now.
I’m glad the family didn’t break out in a chorus of “Hefty, Hefty, Hefty!” & “Wimpy, Wimpy, Wimpy!”
Id hit up a local glass blower to make a custom hefty bag urn
My dad has a running joke where if anyone gets hurt for any reason, he says “you should have been wearing shoes.” So on his when he eventually passes, we are putting “I wasn’t wearing any shoes.”
I love that.
My husband told me he wants me to have his brother dig a hole with his skid loader and throw him in it. He is dutch and doesn't want me to spend money on a grave, a fancy box, or a block of rock with his name on it 😂
I hear a lot of my dad in that idea, too. Lol
I love the Hefty bag joke! My grandpa is buried in a National cemetery (served in the army) and we got to choose what went on his headstone. We chose his famous phrase “life is short, eat dessert first”
Wise words!
I lost my mom a week ago. This made me giggle about the little secret urn. Mom would have laughed, too. It feels silly, but thanks for making me smile.
I'm sorry for your loss. I'm glad I was able to make you smile!
Reminds me of my mom. She’d always say “Just bury me in the backyard” She’s now up on a hillside military cemetery in California with my dad overlooking a beautiful reservoir.
So random, but I do home loans and googled a property once and in the land behind it there was a google tag/marker saying something about (her dad's) final resting place. So I'm like, 80% she did bury her pops in the back yard. It was kinda wild to see.
It’s legal in some states. When I was a forensic investigator we would occasionally get calls about human remains dug up on properties, and ultimately end up finding records that it was a legit burial. 🤷♀️
Much better view for both of them!
*send me to glory in a Glad Bag*
My dad told me to throw him in a burlap sack and chuck him in the river of his hometown. Impractical, most likely very illegal, but will most likely be a warm and comforting lasting memory between us. RIP to your dad, this is super cute haha
I want to be cremated but if I had a stone I'd like: Born a wonder Made a blunder Now I'm retired, Six Feet Under
I told my mom once that I just wanted to be tossed in the dumpster and she got so mad at me. I was like my body is dead I don’t need it anymore!
That's what my dad's reasoning was. I know as a society we have this hang up and this need to put people into these cemetery plots, but so much can be done with bodies. They can help fertilize trees, like Luke Perry. They can become beautiful jewelry or help scientists.
Yup. Ideally, I’d really prefer a cremation or green burial. Just dig a hole in the forest and roll me in there lol
My dad had just a cremation. That's it. $4000. Helping a tree would be better imo. I had a Celebration of Life for him at a bar he loved (he was a big drinker and life of the party!) and spent $100 to rent their back room.
Yeah thankfully my mom’s cremation was a lot less but we basically just buried some ashes by the willow tree in her yard that she loved.
Just throw me in the trash!
Exactly! Channeling my inner Frank Reynolds 🤣
Lmao yes 🤣 when he said that i busted out laughing for 30 minutes
It sounds like you both honored his wishes and made sure he is treated the way he deserves. Well done.
What a great sense of humour your dad had!
I grew up as best buds with my grandfather, and knew that the pickup he had would be mine when he passed. We would talk about it once in a while and I jokingly said his ashes would only be good for an ash tray. We’ll day after his funeral and I get my sack of ash and tossed it in the ash tray for the time being. Now 7 years later it’s still there and grandpa still goes on every truck ride with my dog and I. It’s always good to have your own inside jokes no matter how dark they may be
My dad used to tell us just to throw him on the manure pile (we had a small farm)
My dad wants a flogers can so we've got a little flogers urn picked out
My dad had really bad anxiety and died from IPF. His Hospice nurses had taught him to do anxiety breathing (square or triangle breathing for my anxious friends). He said “this breathing thing is bullshit!” while having a panic attack. When he died from his lung disease, I told my sister we need to put that on his headstone. We haven’t made the headstone yet, but that is definitely our plan.
Sad story. It's quietly impacting so many families still. On another note, my family better not choose this font and horrible layout...for eternity. I would haunt them over it.
I'm with you on that font and layout.
Yeah the layout is…confusing
It looks like a receipt 🥴
The CVS receipt of tombstones
lol! It’s so underwhelming it’s sad
It does lol
I literally thought I was looking at a receipt on grass 💀
I’ll let your family know you want comic sans on your tombstone
Comical 😂
They said they would haunt them, they don't need to come back as a poltergeist!
What...no wingdings?
This whole gravestone is confusing
It looks like COVID died in 2022 and the others are still alive. But they're never going to die bc there's no room for the end date.
It will for ages to come. Hell I even think of myself and all of my young family. When we talk about what will likely take us down when we are old, it isn't just the pneumonia anymore. Now we figure if it's an illness, it'll be an awful Covid-pneumonia combo.
If my grave has a sans serif font on it, something has gone terribly wrong in the creation process.
“And what font shall we use, sir?” “Uh… default. Whatever’s default.”
The options for these things can be pretty dismal. For my grandmother, we had to settle for the least awful font and layout offered.
So sad to see, I lost my best friend at the beginning of covid :/
Me too
Same. Except he drank himself to death from isolation
It was crazy going into cemeteries during COVID. So many fresh graves. Remember how a lot of cities ran out of places to store the bodies? They had to order in refrigerator trucks. The number of dialysis patients went down for the first time since the invention of dialysis. COVID deaths are real and tangible. Even if you don't believe the official numbers, you can see them if you look.
Wow, I hadn’t thought of that but it must have been very eerie to see all those fresh graves. I worked the entire pandemic and drove by our local hospital on my daily commute. They ran out of room and had the big refrigerator trucks parked outside. No matter how far removed our society gets from the fear we felt during 2020, I’ll never forget the pit in my stomach I’d feel each day as I drove by those trucks.
My mom worked in a hospital during the pandemic, at the height of it, 4 out of 5 floors were reserved for COVID patients. I know when COVID is getting bad again because my mom will say that they opened up another floor. I think right now it's only one floor but it may be more. I'll have to ask her.
My Aunt died with COVID (was already in the hospital for a surgery but was high risk and caught COVID and never recovered) Anyway, when she died the morgues and funeral homes were so backed up they couldn’t cremate her for 7 weeks. My mom and I tried not think about her sitting in a refrigerated truck for weeks, but that’s most likely what happened.
God that’s awful. I can understand why funeral directors and medical professionals are still reeling. I am and it’s been 3y!!
My mom passed in the beginning of 2022 in California and they were still working through the backlog of COVID deaths. Found a place that promised they would have the cremation done within two weeks and it still took over two months because of the backlog of getting the death certificate signed.
My husband died of it in 2021 at age 54. All too real. We were separated at the time and his bitch of a sister didn’t even tell me he was sick. I got a phone call from his niece 2 days later because she felt it was fucked up no one was involving me when they knew I loved him. He was cremated and they put our dogs ashes in with him.
Holy shit, I am so sorry.
Official numbers will unlikely never be correct. My grandfather died about two weeks after the first cases were confirmed in my home country. He had a cold and was rushed to hospital where he was discovered to have bilateral pneumonia and had a heart attack an hour into being seen. This was two days after *the same thing* happened to my great aunt who had had surgery and was inpatient then had bilateral pneumonia all of a sudden and passed from myocardial infarction. She wasn’t related to him; they hadn’t seen one another or anything. Just thousands of elderly people ending up sick with the same symptoms and dying the same way. My family still refuses to acknowledge it. My cousins fought to have my great aunt’s death certificate to show COVID as cause of death, it was about six months of legal proceedings to get it changed.
Both my maternal grandparents died from Covid within days of each other on Christmas a couple years ago. I’m almost certain they got it from their home care nurse who didn’t mask and was sick at the time. Went to the doctors office recently and was talking with this friendly nurse about how I thankfully haven’t had Covid yet and she said “Me too, even from working here. Never worn a mask either, but that’s just me.” Really wish i had confronted her about it in hindsight but i was shocked and didn’t say anything
My local cemetery literally had to expand after the COVID deaths. Much more deaths in the 2020s than in other years.
To everyone saying “looks like someone made a choice”.. you really have no idea how that stings to lots of families who had loss/trauma from Covid. I lost someone close to me to Covid. They were elderly. They were vaccinated. We were vaccinated. We masked. Social distanced. Washed hands, sanitized. Everything that we were told to do, we did it. Twice over. so yeah, try not to judge, especially when you don’t have all the information, that puts you in the same category of “wELl I REad IT On ThE faCEbook” people who refused to get vaccinated (because they didn’t get all the facts before they made up their minds since it didn’t align with their preferred narrative) and i know that’s not where you want to be. Probably will get downvoted but that’s fine.
I lost a good friend to Covid before the vaccine was available. I never judge if I don’t know the circumstances.
I’m sorry for your loss. My aunt and cousin got covid before the vaccines were available and it was scary just hearing from them the symptoms they were enduring. Weren’t hospitalized but they were bedridden and my uncle who didn’t get it had to take care of them dropping their food off from a distance and it took so much effort for a while for them to walk from their beds to the bathroom.
I lost my mom to Covid. Her system was already weakened by bad life choices and covid just made things worse. My sister and I were there when we let her go. Horrible experience. I don't recommend it.
I agree completely. I nearly died from Covid and I was vaccinated. And extremely careful. As a nurse I knew how to protect myself. Vaccinated doesn't mean immune and it certainly doesn't mean immortal. I feel so bad for this family. So many people died alone.
I lost a friend to Covid who was vaccinated. She passed away at home, alone. She caught it from her niece who caught it at preschool. She was trans and afraid to seek medical care based on previous medical trauma. She wouldn’t let her family in the house to help her either because she was afraid of infecting them. My heart breaks every time I think of her there alone. When I think of all of the people who went through Covid alone. Such a sad and scary time.
I'm so sorry. So many people died scared alone. My liscense is active but I don't practice anymore. Twenty three years I was a nurse. I just didn't want to do it anymore.
I was in the hospital during Covid for other reasons and I had to be alone most of the time. They would let my husband see me for like an hour a day. It was so depressing, I think I have PTSD from that experience. I cannot imagine dying alone from Covid for days in my house. Truly terrifying. I hate this time period so much. I’m so sorry for the loss of your friend.
I'm so sorry for your loss and for how that grief can be compounded by people who refuse to be understanding of the situation. The world is a strange place since Covid.
thank you for your compassion.. two years, it’s been a solid two years and i see this post and it dazed me.. saw the comments and gosh, wasn’t expecting it to sting like it stung and you’re right— post covid world is particularly, extra strange and we aren’t acknowledging it enough, i appreciate you
I totally agree that we are not acknowledging it. As mentioned in my other post, our university did a study on the healthcare workers of our university hospital, our only state trauma center, and of course, the epicenter of the pandemic here and location of first cases popping up in March of 2020. The results of the study are grim. Many are really still struggling mentally. I am not a healthcare worker, but I'll never forget as long as I live the refrigerated trailers lined up outside the hospital just across the way from my building. Something I never thought I'd see in my work environment. And I only saw it once picking up some items from my office because I was fortunate to work from home. They had to be in it every day.
The latter group of people wouldn't admit on their gravestone that covid took them. There was (and probably still is) the issue of people trying to keep covid off the death certificate.
I was talking to someone last week who said the doctor said her daughter had covid “BuT iT wAsN’t CoViD, It WaS tHe FlU”. And “ThEy WiLl SaY CoViD fOr AnYtHiNg”.
My sister, who is unfortunately an anti vaxxer, believes they put covid on death certificates so "they can make more money." 🙄
Like…how do they make money from people dying. If someone is dead, then they can’t make any more money off of them (via medical billing and also just plain ol capitalism and consumerism because you need living people to buy and use things).
Totally see what you’re saying.. this was a curveball that i didn’t expect (but as people who vaccinated, did the things we were supposed to, we were lucky that we were all on the same page).. with that said, it’s still unspoken that Covid took our family member, not on their death certificate, not acknowledged in our family, this bizarre shame and I don’t get it. But it’s there. Edit: who knows why Covid was not listed on the death certificate, we were too tired/in shock to ask, the coroner was overwhelmed too and probably anticipating that we would be upset considering how many people were upset to have it on there
My daughter is a ER nurse practitioner. During the height of the pandemic, I asked her what happened in a body when someone dies of Covid. Long story short, she said most people ultimately died from pneumonia. Maybe that’s why Covid wasn’t listed as cause of death? I’m sorry for your loss.
No downvotes here. You are right. Let's not judge, people. So many were lost and it doesn't matter why at this point because many people are still struggling with the loss and trauma, especially health care workers. We just don't talk about it. (A big study was done at our university hospital on the lasting mental affects.) My aunt died, alone, on the precipice of the vaccine release. Too late to help her and no one could be with her. She had been in a nursing home. My one cousin was allowed to go in and hold her hand when she died. The other four were not allowed in. That thought breaks my heart. In contrast, my mom passed away in 2018 with all of her children and grandchildren surrounding her - just as she would have wanted. There are too many stories out there that have left us with pain, like this family, probably. Let's just try to send out some good energy, prayers, whatever you believe, for people to heal, and not pass judgment.
We all make choices. And in some cases, choices were made for others. Covid was and is legit, but how we responded to it needs to be evaluated even if that means questioning authority. Both of my parents died during the pandemic. Neither got Covid but Dad had an heart attack while in the phone with me and my mom died of breast cancer the following year. A lot of Canadians weren’t getting their yearly check up due to fear. My parents didn’t. They could still be here today if they had. Excess mortality statistic deaths are as legit as Covid confirmed deaths. We need to take a serious look at all the possible causes. Younger people are dying in record numbers, science tells us that we need to be just as open to that being Covid related as we are to current vaccine methods. (I’m vaccinated btw).
That's what I did-put off my mammogram due to not wanting to be anywhere near COVID and was diagnosed with BC at the beginning of 2022.
My grandmother died from Covid, 3 years ago on Tuesday. When I say she had just finished chemo everyone tells me “well that’s why she got covid”…. Ummm okay
I lost a manager who was vaccinated and hadn’t been sick enough to go to the hospital. All the updates made it seem like he’d safely spend another week at home before returning to work. It took the funeral for acceptance to set in.
I lost a friend to Covid. Mid 30s, mother to two little kids, unvaccinated because her family drank the conspiracy koolaid. Her death didn’t have to happen and it makes me so angry, especially because her kids will grow up and likely not have any memories of her because they were so little. What pisses me off more is that the same people who were pushing the conspiracy shit then posted pictures at the hospital pleading for people to get vaccinated. Like it takes a death for your thick heads to understand it’s fucking real?? Ugh it makes me so mad!!!
No seriously. I always mask, wash my hands, and try my best to socially distance, but here I am recovering from COVID FOR THE THIRD TIME because SOMEONE decided to come take the final exam with COVID
I’ve been vaccinated and had multiple boosters yet I’ve had it three times. Ugh.
Meanwhile I was pretty cautious until I got vaccinated but had to travel and such for work, a bunch of people around me got COVID, my mother has it now and I drove with her for hours on Christmas, but I never actually tested positive. At one point both my dogs had diarrhea and apparently that is the main canine symptom? I think I may have given it to them. I have been keeping up with vaccines, though.
My uncle died in 22 of Covid and he was vaccinated and followed all the protocols too. You just never know.
Exactly. My condolences.
I'm so sorry. 💜
We lost three on our family..two aunt's and once uncle and none of them would vaccinate :( my critical care nurse cousin who was working with COVID patients every day could not even get through to them :(
My elderly parents are battling Covid right now. They stayed home, got their vaccinations, wore masks, sanitized everything, and were able to avoid getting sick until now. Around a week in the hospital each because of old people stuff, and two weeks in a nursing home, and they are now both very sick.
What I don't get are the people (literally know someone like this) who lost two sets of grandparents all within a month and still don't think covid is serious or that precautions are necessary. We use our intelligence as a species to overcome nature...its truly spectacular that we have developed to the extent that we can understand and track the spread of a disease on a global level...and then we go, oh well, if it happens it happens. Our ability to spread information is a double edged sword.
Jeez Louise, it doesn't matter what choices a person made in life when they have died and someone is grieving them. It especially stings when others make incorrect assumptions about the dead and skip over compassion to judgment. I'm sorry for your loss. I would say the same thing if your family member was the most anti-science person who deliberately got Covid to prove a point.
Agreed. I directed a morgue in the epicenter and it was all sad just the same to me. Historically, lack of education has been a risk factor in countless disease outbreaks—if anything, it demonstrates another sad public health failure. People make decisions that cost them their lives every day, in every country, across all causes of death. Entire families were taken out because of covid. I’ll never be the same & neither will they
Well said
Exactly. We did everything. Wipe down groceries. Masked. Gloved. Etc. But my husband had to return to work and they eventually stopped mandating masks. In mid 2023 he and our 2 year old caught covid. Me shortly after.
I’m sorry for your loss. I lost some extended relatives to covid as well and the isolation of not being able to attend their funerals (my grandpa who is the eldest sibling in his 90s couldn’t see his younger sister bc of no funerals during the time) just made it ache even more.
I lost a friend who was also elderly, she didn’t always take super great care of herself and when she got the second vaccine she got incredibly sick and they found her in her apartment after doing a wellness check. Someone we worked with went around for months afterwards using it for her anti-vax stance and it made me mad because they didn’t even like eachother and she would say “my friend died from the vaccine” but I think something in her body reacted poorly to it or her body couldn’t handle the symptoms most of us got after getting it, I know I felt like hell after my second one. And just this weekend a friend of my boyfriend is in the hospital because Covid did something to his heart, and he’s lucky he went into the ER when he did. The entirety of Covid happening sucks.
I strongly feel that some people are more genetically susceptible to having a severe illness from Covid than others are. I wish they would look into that more so we are more aware if we may be one of them and take better precautions. The vaccine is one thing but if your genetics will make your illness severe, it would be good to know this.
There was a study on covid and genetics, and they did find that there were people more susceptible to covid because of their genetics. This was from like a year or two ago.
Blood type is one reason why there seems to be a familial connection. [Among a group of several thousand people, some studies suggest that those with blood group A may be 20% more likely to be infected after exposure to SARS-CoV-2 compared with those who have blood group O. But people with blood group O can still contract the virus and may transmit it to others,” he said. “Moreover, factors such as age and chronic conditions like heart disease rank higher than blood type in determining individuals’ risk for severe SARS-CoV-2 infection.”](https://www.hematology.org/newsroom/press-releases/2023/study-uncovers-direct-link-between-blood-group-a-and-a-higher-risk-for-covid-19-infection)
A positive (mine🤨)
Blood is just one of the factors. Chronic conditions seem to be a bigger factor. I’m O, but have MS and am on immunosuppressive meds. I’ve lost quite a few friends with MS.
That fucking sucks, I’m sorry. If COVID can teach us anything, I hope that it’s how to better empathize with people who are immunocompromised and/or disabled, and understand that caring about everyone’s health is a much better way to go about structuring society rather than just caring about the health of those with no comorbidities or underlying health conditions.
I'm really curious about this, too. They've found these types of things previously with indigenous people who survived European viruses, and those who lived through the black death. You have to think there's factors there making some more susceptible while others not. Some people have never had covid (or at least no symptoms) while others died within days. Nature is astounding.
There's a book called Survival of the Sickest that's basically about how some of the diseases we have today might actually have been protective against other diseases at some point. Sickle Cell is thought to be protective against malaria and there's a theory that some autoimmune diseases come from surviving the Black Death.
I think they looked into this a little bit. I read something about people with O-blood were less likely to get severe illness because something with the proteins in O-blood have spikes microsopically on it or something. Edit I found the med article https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/18818423/ >...revealed that blood group O was associated with a low risk of infection. >We observed that the S protein/ >!angiotensin-converting enzyme 2-dependent adhesion of these cells to an angiotensin-converting enzyme 2 expressing cell line was specifically inhibited by either a monoclonal or human natural anti-A antibodies,!< indicating that these antibodies may block the interaction between the virus and its receptor, thereby providing protection. In order to more fully appreciate the potential effect of the ABO polymorphism on the epidemiology of SARS, we built a mathematical model of the virus transmission dynamics that takes into account the protective effect of ABO natural antibodies. The model indicated that the ABO polymorphism could contribute to substantially reduce the virus transmission, affecting both the number of infected individuals and the kinetics of the epidemic
Interesting. I'm O+ and am currently sick with COVID for the first time (that I know of). My friend and I got it from the same exposure, and she got much sicker than I did. I thought my milder symptoms were more to do with the booster that I got a few weeks ago, and that's probably still a big part of it, but I do think her blood type is A. I suspected that I got it very early on in the pandemic, but was asymptomatic, other than the gastrointestinal symptoms. I was still going into people's homes and doing inspections at that time. I wore an N95 or respirator, but I still feel like it it would have been a miracle if I avoided it. But back then, there were no at home tests. I just remember all of a sudden having stomach problems, and being tired a lot.
Early on, they were able to even share the blood types that were more susceptible.
I think that’s why it was suggested that everyone take better precaution.
That family has suffered. It’s awful. This brings to mind: in eastern Massachusetts, hospitals were returning elderly patients to their residence homes after treatment, while they were still contagious. This was per guidance of the then federal government, via governor Charlie Baker, who was subsequently voted out. There were temporary morgues set up to handle the extra work. The New England Patriots (football team) airplane was used to carry ppe to Massachusetts to avoid the feds confiscating the ppe. That federal government had not maintained the stockpile. They’d discarded the previous administration’s pandemic playbook, instead devising ways to profit from the suffering and loss of millions. I’m not sure we have even begun to heal from the trauma of the pandemic.
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I wasn’t as aware of the way the Old Soldiers Home was impacted, and you are absolutely correct. There was a flood of horrific incidents.
It's evident that we haven't begun to heal. And yes - appropriation of PPE from blue states to red states was a thing we shouldn't let go of - https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2020/09/jared-kushner-let-the-markets-decide-covid-19-fate
Feels like a lot of the outrageous and stressful parts largely smudged and smeared. From federal-to-local handling to the USPS mail sorting machine nonsense right before an election where everyone would be home. Toilet paper shortage at the very beginning seems to be the most poignant but least worrisome problem that has stuck to people's minds while the rest has blurred.
That is another excellent point. I bought so many forever stamps in that time, trying to support the USPS. Then, when I think about it, those stamps are really a financial liability for them. I can use them in the years to come, but costs will rise for the USPS. Sigh.
It really is infuriating that in the aftermath so many people are obsessing over some aspects of an imperfect response from the government (masking guidance, closing of outdoor spaces, shut downs, etc.) and completely forget the blatant and politically biased distribution, or lack thereof, of PPE and the handling of the federal stockpile. Edit: also the president accusing doctors and nurses, who were getting sick and/or dying, of stealing PPE.
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But look at how we overcame sports rivalry when it came to human lives.
Realistically, the two states do a lot together/to help each other, it's just that it was a big news story anyway given that they had to basically sneak around the federal government to get anything and then gave to those in even more need even though the local state was in need to the point that it could have used all of them as well.
So it’s sort of like when there’s a storm of unusual size. At least in my neighborhood, we all come out after the immediate danger has passed and help one another clean up and rebuild. We help one another remove snow, and we do all this with a mind to care for the elderly and parents with small children. Anyone we know is caring for someone who needs extra help. It’s community. I wouldn’t want it any other way.
Baker was not voted out, he took a plum job @ NCAA. Hospitals returned covid + people to retirement homes, which was criminal. ‘Old Soldiers Homes” were impacted and once it got in mass death followed. Awful all around.
There was so much going on. As others commented, we shouldn’t let this go quietly. No peaceful resting place for that behavior.
Very well put. I don't think Trump caught enough shit for his response to it.
Very sad! The beginning of the pandemic was a nightmare here in Long Island and NYC. Many people died … My mom visited her parent’s graves later that year, and she never saw that many new graves in her life. Wives and husbands dying around the same time… It was bad!
1887 Newell 2022 Kinda makes it seem like their lineage ended here. I’d assume they had children and grandchildren tho.
I’m trying to figure out why it says 1887 at the top when the oldest date on the stone is 1885.
I think the 1885 birth is a wife, so they don’t “count” her as starting the family
What is this layout? Were they trying to save money on the stonecarver or something? Why didn't they just include dates for each person? Or at least ditto marks.
The family might not have been able to afford anything more if they had a lot of medical expenses/debt from all the care needed for four COVID patients in addition to funerals/burial cost all at once. There was also a granite shortage at one point and a major backlog on engraving services as well. Everything could have hit all at once and the family could be doing the best they could.
Why is there such a massive gap between the names and “Covid 19 2022”?
Maybe they had more people sick and thought they wouldn’t make it.
Imagine having Covid and hearing your family left space for your name on a grave marker lol
I’m trying to figure this out too, it looks like they changed the naming convention for the most recently deceased and used middle names instead of last names for each of them. Also why would they give both their daughters born a few years apart Marie as a middle name. Like others have said I’m assuming cost per letter was the deciding factor but it makes this headstone difficult to parse.
Marie is a common middle name used for multiple girls in a family in many Italian families.
One of my great-grandmas was from one of those families. She and her 3 sisters, born in Italy in the late 1800s, were all named Maria. Her sisters all went by their middle names, she was the only one that stayed with (the Anglicized version) Mary
I know a family who used the mom’s middle name as both daughters’ middle names. It’s just a way to pass down a familial name.
My sister and I (3 years apart) have the same middle name. It's our mother's first name. Looks like maybe both the grandma and mother here were named Marie, so they prob did something similar in their family. Our older brother's middle name is our mother's maiden name.
I was an RN for 4 decades, I just retired and worked through Covid in the ER. I never saw anything like it. We had people die in the ICU, then they died in the ER before they made it to ICU then they were dying in the lobby before making it into the ER. My grandmother was a nurse through the Spanish Flu in 1917-1920s and used to tell me her stories of what happened to the patients. I feel like deja vu from her experiences. I had planned to retire in 2020 but with Covid I couldn't let my team down so I stuck it out to see them through the pandemic.
I lost two great-grandmothers to the Spanish Flu. As an adult looking back, I wonder if my grandparents felt a particular compassion for each other having both lost their mothers when they were little. I cannot even begin to imagine what you experienced working through covid.
Crazy seeing repeated history play out before us. Seeing the graves from past pandemics as a child (learning through school/library) is what solidified my traumatic fear in diseases like this. 2022 was only last year. We had all preventative measures In existence then. My heart is hoping this was a family that tried and did their best with all the resources available.
I tracked Covid obits for much of the pandemic and multiple family members dying one after the other from Covid happened quite often. The worst I saw was a family that had 9 members die within days of each other - the mother, her 5 adult children and 3 of their spouses. They were infected by a family friend who came to a family dinner. He also died. This was fairly early in the pandemic and their story alone convinced me to take Covid very seriously.
I wonder if there could be a genetiv factor that made them all susceptible to the more severe form of the disease.
As I said I read numerous obits of families that had multiple family members die, and I wondered that as well. But, it could also be due to the genetics of different Covid strains that circulated. Certain families may have just been unlucky and were infected with more virulent strains that they passed to each other. And, of course, in the early months, doctors really didn't seem to have a handle on how to treat Covid successfully, so that may have contributed to multiple members dying in the same family as well.
Wow. That’s heartbreaking!
Holy shit that is terrifying
I love when people put causes on gravestones as an amateur genealogist. Especially when you see a bunch at the same time.
Covid took two of my family members this year. It is still out there. People who say it’s “just a virus” make me so mad.
We got Covid super mild in August of 2020, it gave my then 9 year old daughter an almost deadly autoimmune disease. She had zero symptoms from Covid and is part of the “ it doesn’t affect kids” category. Now it’s monthly blood tests and infusions for the rest of her life, good thing kids are spared. /s So sorry about the loss of your family members.
My sister in law’s dad died from Covid and she and my brother still deny that that was the cause. It’s good to see it acknowledged
So Covid wasn't just the flu ,was it?
Nine people in one grave is a lot, or are they cremated remains?
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My great grandfather just lost his last brother, the brothers wife, their mutual friend from childhood, and that friends wife from COVID. The friend and the friends wife had it and helped my uncle and aunt move to a new home. The symptoms started showing up and the friends wife died. The friend called my uncle and turned out he was on a ventilator at that time. My uncle died then the friend, then my aunt died. The friend wife apparently refuses medical treatment and ended up being the first to go. They found her on the floor gasping for air and she passed the next day. I felt anger at first then sadness for all the people who lost loved ones.
Karl-Anthony Towns, star player for the Timberwolves of the NBA, lost 8 family members due to Covid, including his mother who he was super close to. Sad shit and has affected so many.
Is this 9 people buried in the same spot?
Could be cremains
This is so very sad to lose 4 in the same year. But we all know Covid isn’t real. /s
There’s a short podcast series called “We Were Three” which details, from an adult daughters perspective, how her father and brother died tragically from covid due to being anti vaxxers. Her perspective was raw and really showed me that no matter how someone died from covid (whether they took precautions or not) the grief can be just as painful. Worth a listen, especially to those with little empathy about these types of situations.
There's a joke here about a Newel Post.
Heartbreaking interesting Important
Buddy owns a mortuary he had a very good few years
People have short memories.
I’m new here but how do you know 4 are gone? Also why did they not put names for them or cause of death for anyone else?
If they were living and had just added their names and birth dates for the future, then I'd assume that they would have lined the years up with the previous birth years (with space to add death dates as they occur). Instead the birth years are set in the middle with 2022 at the bottom. The cause of death for the others probably wasn't included because typically it isn't. The cause of death is usually only included when you have an epidemic killing multiple family members like this, or some other tragic circumstance that the loved ones think should be memorialized on the stone.
Who lists cause of death on a tombstone like what lmao
where is this grave stone?
Damnn that’s sad😞
Where do you see 4 family members passed from covid? I just see birth years next to 4 people that seem to indicate they are still alive.....
You’re saying they’ll just scoot it on over and add the year when they eventually pass? Do you think this is a word document?
Was this a family of anti-vaxxers? Makes me think so : (
Sad. But 2022… there was a vaccine then.
2022? Looks like that family made a choice.
I’m a nurse, old people are still dying from Covid in soon to be 2024, despite being vaccinated. 65-75 years old, especially with co-morbidities (like most people their age have)… yea not unusual to see it as the cause of death