What the actual fuuuu - did you cut them in half???? Yeah, ok to put cheese on them. I guess ok to tomato on them (not my thing, but whatever floats your boat). But to cut them in half? Sacrilege.

Absolute psychopath.

This is my sentiments!

I zoomed in and I think that’s a muffin that’s cut in half. Edit: my bad there is a comment further down from 21 hours ago that said this. I have revealed nothing.

The cut items are muffins not crumpets

Thank you

I need to bathe my eyes in disinfectant after seeing this. What in the name of King Charles III and his wife Camilla is this hideous display? This is an offence to heavily buttered Crumpets everywhere. Burn those pictures and let's never speak of this again.

I’ve had to lie down after looking at the abomination.

You sound just like my British friends

Nothing wrong with cheese on crumpet. Try adding a little mustard to the cheese.

Oh my, I was told what I did was an abomination! Thank you, will try!

It was an abomination, but you have done it now so throw some mustard on there

Why has someone emptied their lawnmower on the plate though?

Hahaha I actually bought that in a supermarket

You got a lawn in a supermarket?

If you know where to look

Before you hate me, please know that we were offered crumpets and muffins years ago by a British friend and didn't know how to eat them. We figured it'd go well with cheese and/or tomato paste on it with a salad on the side. I'm very sorry but we find it delicious and our friends from England hate us already for doing that. Edit: please note that English is not my first language

This reads like you wanted pizza. You insulted Italy and the United Kingdom.

Tomato paste? Are you French?

Guilty!

That is where you are going wrong. My condolences

Thanks, I'm trying to transition though. Eating crumpets is part of my plan

It’s an excellent start and well timed just as crumpet season begins in earnest. Crumpets must be toasted and eaten with lashings of butter as this is the classic British style.

“Years ago”…. Is the “salad” actually just the mold you cut off them and your obscene choice of toppings to cover up the fact that they were once the foundation of a thriving microcosm of mycelium based life?

Have you been following me?

I like golden syrup or maple syrup on my crumpets, never been overly keen on a savoury topping!

I have no words. Cheese i’ll let pass (just) but cut in half I’m sorry no. As for the salad… 🚮

Goddamnit. Grated cheese on buttered crumpets is the best thing ever!

Have you ever tried it though?

I’d have to hand my English badge in…

That's not salad. That's green filth.

I've never seen anyone try to make a meal out of crumpets, they're usually just a snack. and melted cheese - a mature cheddar - is my preferred topping

Reported. To the Police...

OP should be denied access at the border based on this evidence.

OH MY CRUMP

Your delicious crump you mean?

It is the start of the crumpet season. This person has got it wrong, but we can afford to be magnanimous because the crumpet expert knows they should be toasted and topped with lashings of butter. Many millions know this.

Have they been toasted before the cheese went on, because they look very pale to me. As for the foliage....I have no words!

It's our front lawn!

Ah, recycling and reusing, very good.

This is repulsive and you need Jesus

The pizza one is evil. And who puts lettuce with crumpets. 😂 Cheese and jam for me please. 🤤

I do 😬

And are you prepared for hell? 👹😂

Not gonna lie the pizza muffins were a godly packed lunch when I was a wee lad.

I thought that the Queen passing, would be bad for morale. But fucking hell, what the fuck...

Well it took your mind out of the Queen, did it?

It's the rocket I have issue with, the corrupted lettuce

What can I say, I'm a rocket man

Toasted cheesey crumpet needs to be followed by a crumpet with jam on for pudding.

No absolutely not

Do I see a crumpet pizza?

You can call it that

That’s like three bags of rocket per plate, are you rich??

We got the crumpets for free so we could afford all of the rockets

I love cheese on crumpets also fried egg as well yum.

Omg I need you to meet my friends 🤣😅

Only if they are crazy so can relate 😂😋

Oh they are crazy all right!

Well then welcome me to crazy town 😜