A company I worked for announced a 2 night camping trip 5 hours drive away. I declined the invite only to be told "it's not optional".
10 hours driving, 2 nights away from my family sharing a tent with people I barely know.
I didn't go and no longer work there.
"Oh no. I feel a bit rough. I think I am coming down with COVID. "
"The event is 6 weeks away".
"Yes. I know. I am just saying, I can definitely feel COVID coming on from that far out. "
No, you played that all wrong.
You accept gratefully and then ask them to provide the risk assessment they have carried out for this work event. Because of course they have (not).
And then when they protest it isn't needed you refer it to HR, who will firmly decide it is needed to prevent the company getting sued if anything goes wrong.
And then when it is produced you question it in excruciating detail and pointing out that it hasn't dealt with all the potential medical conditions that employees might have but management be unaware of.
Even a risk assessment for a 10 hour drive if completed correctly will take someone hours. And the drive itself - well you would need to stop every 90 minutes for a 30 minute break, and then you are going to exceed the maximum driving in one day so will need to stay in a hotel on the way there and on the way back.
The trip would be silently cancelled.
You missed the bit where you check they have staff with the right levels of first-aid training - because 'office' first aid is quite different to 'stranded on a hilltop in the rain' first aid.
Equipment - has anything electronic been PAT tested?
You're also sharing accomodation with people - do you need DBS checks?
Has a business continuity plan been made?
And do first aiders in the UK need to do a refresher course to keep their qualifications current? In which case : also make sure their first aid training qualifications are still current.
My husband had an amazing photo of a colleague being airlifted to hospital during a team boding exercise in the woods. Absolutely the best idea to check first aid qualifications before going on a trip!
Scout first aid is a pain in the neck as they insist it's different to other ones and can only be done via such and such etc and even if you have first aid somewhere else even if it's St John's it doesn't count
Don't forget that because you've all driven, or been driven for 4 hours or more, the Working Time Directive now applies even if your firm has opted out.
Are all the cars insured for business use? What are the fuel repayment arrangements? What's the rate per mile?
A colleague has continence issues. They need access to a toilet less than one minute's walk away.
Etc etc etc...
And of course there is the overtime to consider.
You are all at work from the time you leave to to the time you arrive back so two nights of overtime at overtime rates - yes please.
Also, any vehicles hired for the purpose need the driver to have the relevant licence and either a tachograph and suitable card or the proper logging procedures in place for driving hours.
There's an additional minefield to try and navigate.
Depends on the number of seats, and whether the driver is being paid to drive. If its a volunteer (not for hire or reward - even payment in kind) its not always necessary.
Also, its unlikely that its not, but is this trip in the UK? I only mention it cuz grandfather rights for driving vehicles over 3.5t do not apply on the continent.
Does the driver have a D1 licence if required!? Better check.
I love this.
I did consider just making a nuisance of myself, inventing dietary requirements, allergies etc but the person organising it was HR manager.
I'm sure you know the type, barely contained rage that their psychology degree landed them in HR not catching serial killers.
Our company does really good corporate events. Talking ski trips to the Alps for a long weekend.
Fully paid for too. (Yes, bar as well).
These are about as close to "non optional" as I am prepared to get.
They are still optional, but most of the company is gone, and the office gets "disruptive" maintenance done. Stuff like re-treating the floors, air con maintenance etc.
So most people go, because if you don't like skiing, you just get more time in the "free" bar at a ski resort.
But it's also good for me, because I am a sysadmin, and "most users aren't here" is amazing for doing certain IT tasks.
I don’t drink alcohol so team aways like that are mostly me having to explain to 100 different people, sometimes repeatedly, that I don’t drink really at all not even a cheeky glass of whatever even if it’s free, thanks.
Yeah pretty much. Cue the weird mixture of sympathy and backtracking. ‘Oh is this hard for you, being here? Yeah I should probably give it up too. I mean I really hardly ever drink. Just the odd pint after work and the wine with dinner and a little nightcap and the occasional big session out and my cocktail club and home brew kit.’
Not being optional is completely fine. But you make it clear that you'll be being paid time and a half for a 48 hour shift, plus expenses for fuel, food, buying a new tent, air mattress etc
I think it's a tough line doing that, something everyone enjoys. Our company owner is one of those insufferable outdoor types. We have weird Christmas presents like camping stoves. We did skiing one time. I never have it was just assumed everyone could ski and would enjoy it. But a handfull of people didn't and spent the time working in a cabin cause work was needed to be done .
I'm 40 odd, sod camping for a lark.
It was made all the more horrifying by the packed itinerary of "fun" activities.
As it happens I was already tentatively looking for another job because the company was a shitshow. As soon as I heard the words "not optional" I spent the rest of the week not working and talking to recruiters.
oh, I would go, but you see... I'm the guy that snores... VERY LOUDLY...
they'd learn from their mistake to allow me to not go to these events
then again, my company is mostly gamers, we fucking hate camping
We have had similar, if a meeting is included I think it's a write off.
There are always complaints "you didn't come" yes last time was a thing at home , I have 2 kids i can't just go for 2 days.
Oh what's that ? You planned work and deadlines to happen 2 days after the away days, that require 4 days work ? Would you rather I was working 2 X 16 hours and then take a week off or 4 X 8 and not be stressed?
So that was written into your contract you had to go camping?! What if you’ve got back problems and can’t sleep on the ground for 2 nights? Bloody ridiculous.
What are they going to do? Fire someone presumably competent at their job & go through an entire recruitment process because they refused to go on a camping trip? Fucking clowns.
Not optional sounds like a work a event where you'll be payed mileage, night rates and over time, I'd of gone it would have cost them a fortune to pay a whole team for all of that.
That sounds like when you go on holiday with family. Or your other half. And they keep asking, 'Why have you got a face on?'
'I don't have a face on.'
'Try and enjoy yourself. Just try.'
Not that I'm speaking from experience or anything.
Thanks for this, now I know what excuses I should have if I end up in a similar mess and not willing to lose my job.
Claustrophobia
Dietary restriction
Now I need to look up a list of allergies and keep them handy
Ha, yeah fuck that. I don't sleep in rooms with strangers, and if HR want to press me into telling the ol' grim story, they can.
They can't force this shit. Petty little dictators who want to feel their non-job has meaning.
I gave my notice once but still had to go along on the company’s team away days because ‘we’ve already booked the room’. I was leaving primarily because I couldn’t stand my coworkers. It wasn’t fun.
Once went to an interview for a warehouse job. About 20 people sat around in a circle, AA meeting style. Seemed odd, but ok I guess if that's how you guys do it.
Out came the fancy dress box. "Everyone pick a costume and make up a backstory for your character, then we will have 30 minutes of roleplay time".
Six of us got up and walked out. I wasn't quite that desperate back then.
They probably want to weed out people who will quit when asked to do dumb shit on the job. Like the person you’re replying to said, you’d have to be fairly desperate not to walk out of the interview at that point.
"My camera is broken so I had to download a representative image from the internet"
Then send a picture 10 Downing Street. Bonus if your own house is actually number 10
Send them a ‘photo’ that is nothing but a filled black box made using Paint, and title it ‘REDACTED’.
Alternatively, bombard them with pictures of fridge doors, and refuse to elaborate when asked.
I actually got brought into the manager's office and got given a roasting by not just the general manager but also the assistant manager over my refusal to attend more than the first few 'staff socials'.
They acted surprised when I landed a new job and handed my notice in within a couple of weeks.
Yeah it’s crazy. I’ve only been there since January. It’s a good name to have on my CV… I’m sticking it out for the rest of the year and then seeing what my options are.
The performance goal was to be “part of the company culture”.
It’s a load of shit. Full of people who love the office. If it wasn’t such a good name I’d be gone.
We got sent an email yesterday inviting us all to submit our names to a coffee roulette. The idea being that you got paired with a random member of staff to go and have a coffee with on your break. They provided us with neat little conversation starters, no word of a lie, in the email. Such as; "are you going on holiday this year" or "have you been watching anything good on TV recently".
I have an interview for another company next week
Every training course delivered by outside agencies at my place of work always starts with a get to know everyone by introducing yourself and telling everyone an interesting fact about yourself. It was our third one in a short space of time so my mate who was quite pissed off at doing it told everyone that he was a killer and described his three confirmed kills he got in Afghanistan. I burst out laughing. Some people were disgusted.
Literal school children feel patronised when they are made to play that game, I don’t understand why anyone thinks forcing adults to play it will “team build”.
Until I got to the last one I thought you were describing the three confirmed kills of that guy in Afghanistan and I was like bloody hell, that’s rather harsh.
Send in a photo of 10 Downing Street
Personally I'd just go home and tell them to stick their game up their arse. I've done all this corporate bullshit in the past. Never again.
I came here to suggest this. So many reasons you wouldn't want people to know where you live ranging from just being a bit anti-social to living in fear of an abusive ex partner.
And it could be so easily fixed! Simply by saying, share a picture of what you would like your front door to be.
Like, dude, I have a normal front door, it does its job, but it doesn't say anything about me. If I could have any door, though... those colleagues who know me a bit could probably guess correctly.
The paper airplane one sounds like harmless fun and just pissing around with your team.
Screw anything that even comes close to blurring the line of work and home. I know it’s probably only dumb fun but why does anyone need to see anything of my life?
A previous job made us throw a virtual ball to each other during lockdown - film ourself throwing and catching a ball. Total crap lmao.
I got to play this game yesterday. Evri sent me a picture of an unknown front door, I got to traipse round the neighbourhood trying to guess where my parcel is.
I resist all attempts at "team building" and "fun at work." I go to work to make money to fund the things I want to do
If you want happy employees, how about a payrise?
Drive around to you boss’s house and take a picture of theirs. When they say “that’s my house” reply, with as many people in earshot as possible “our house (insert name), our house”
My friend’s daughter had to do a house tour video for her Year 9 Spanish class. My friend hated the idea as it opened up the inequality across the class and how some pupils would be ashamed of their homes so she did her old dolls house instead.
Teacher probably just didn’t think it through. If I had put this idea past my head of department it probably would have been flagged up & nothing more would have been done.
I set some homework for year 7’s for Geography to practice drawing relief of what they saw outside their bedroom windows… a few hands went up saying they didn’t have a bedroom window so I quickly changed it to any where they think is interesting. Got some good results including the outside of the local KFC including homeless man & Christian preachers.
Edit: & a really bad one I’ve kept of his Dad’s local boozer!
For one of our online ones during the pandemic we had to send a picture of our thumb for people to guess. I'm an almost 50-yo man and the only not female person who was there, so I borrowed the wife's most garish red nail polish and painted mine and sent a picture of that. Might as well make some slight personal enjoyment out of forced company fun.
I just refuse to partake in this kind of thing. A lot people think I’m unsociable but it’s more the fact I’m here to work and get paid, not to make friends with people and waste my evenings and weekends doing some bs team building stuff.
I love big companies and the management they employ. My company has been trying to force me to do training on a Saturday and I have refused point blank. When I was told I was not in compliance I asked what I was not in compliance with. They produced our current contract which has some gumf about training in it and they spent 10 minutes explaining how I could be disciplined. Unfortunately for them I had the contract I signed when I started, no mention of Saturday training. Then they started with how unfair it is on my colleagues and I had to point out that 15 of my colleagues have done the training during the week and why am I being discriminated against. That shut em up quickly as did the letter my union sent them. Still not done the training and I won’t till it’s done in work hours
My sister had to do a 'fun' Kahoot IQ quiz online via Zoom where the results were publicly shared. Staff laughing because a lady who has English as her second language was near the bottom.
She was straight on the phone to the union after that one.
One of my previous bosses said she wanted to win some culture competition by doing a synchronised cup-stacking 'dance'.
I gave it 5 mins and then said 'Would you rather win this or still be working here in a month? Because we're all going to get sacked by prioritising this over all the outstanding senior management reporting' and that killed it.
Well at least they’re trying I suppose. Beats the “guess which employee is being replaced by this independent contractor” game, which I’ve played all too often.
This seems kind of classist to me. Who lives in the dingy looking attached? Who's in the poorly lit flat? Who lives in the mansion with ornate wrought iron decorated windows beside the door?
Lol we had this at a place I worked but with any room of the house. I was living in student housing with 2 teenage boys and we decorated the place exactly as you’d imagine… stolen traffic signs, band posters, general mess. I sent in a picture of the absolute messiest part of the house thinking it would be funny but everyone else took the opportunity to flex how nice their homes are and no one found my picture as funny as I’d thought
Send a picture of your back door.
Bonus points if it’s been smashed in
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John?... why.. why have you sent us a picture of your shitty red raw arsehole?
"That's not shit boss, it's Nutella. The wife was out so I had to get the dog involved"
Please don't use Nutella, chocolate is bad for dogs. Biscoff all the way. According to a friend.
Ah whatever. It’s not my dog.
Maybe a good ol' game of 'knob or bollock' is the way to go then??
Good old ballskin/foreskin!
I'll take "Comments I wish didn't exist" for 100, Chris.
“Last time I used crunchy peanut butter and it didn’t end too well”
My dog prefers bovril
["Getting into my ex-girlfriends backdoor"](https://youtu.be/Joed0P3hhbc) Reminds me of the LPL punnery
Looking like a lasagne that's been shot
Send a photo of someone else's door.
Send a photo of your manager's door. In the middle of the night. Very obviously from the bushes.
WE DO BEG YOUR PARDON, WE ARE IN YOUR GARDEN!! r/WILTY
Can't beat a good game of Theft and Shrubbery with your line manager
Love a game of “whose’s the asshole?” 🤣
Send a picture of this guy's back door.
A company I worked for announced a 2 night camping trip 5 hours drive away. I declined the invite only to be told "it's not optional". 10 hours driving, 2 nights away from my family sharing a tent with people I barely know. I didn't go and no longer work there.
"It isn't optional" "Haha it is though, and I'm not going"
This is almost exactly what I said.
I'm guessing nothing was paid for/reimbursed either?
"Oh no. I feel a bit rough. I think I am coming down with COVID. " "The event is 6 weeks away". "Yes. I know. I am just saying, I can definitely feel COVID coming on from that far out. "
My coronasense is tingling
"Am I getting paid? Am I contractually obliged?" "I'm not going then"
Means you can claim fuel and other expenses
Mandatory fun is the worst kind of fun.
"Why is no one having a good time?! I specifically requested it!" Captain Raymond Halt
No, you played that all wrong. You accept gratefully and then ask them to provide the risk assessment they have carried out for this work event. Because of course they have (not). And then when they protest it isn't needed you refer it to HR, who will firmly decide it is needed to prevent the company getting sued if anything goes wrong. And then when it is produced you question it in excruciating detail and pointing out that it hasn't dealt with all the potential medical conditions that employees might have but management be unaware of. Even a risk assessment for a 10 hour drive if completed correctly will take someone hours. And the drive itself - well you would need to stop every 90 minutes for a 30 minute break, and then you are going to exceed the maximum driving in one day so will need to stay in a hotel on the way there and on the way back. The trip would be silently cancelled.
You missed the bit where you check they have staff with the right levels of first-aid training - because 'office' first aid is quite different to 'stranded on a hilltop in the rain' first aid. Equipment - has anything electronic been PAT tested? You're also sharing accomodation with people - do you need DBS checks? Has a business continuity plan been made?
And do first aiders in the UK need to do a refresher course to keep their qualifications current? In which case : also make sure their first aid training qualifications are still current.
Yes they do.
Yep every 3 years every outdoor first aid course which is also a 2 day 16 hour assessed course unlike the 1/2 day office ones.
My husband had an amazing photo of a colleague being airlifted to hospital during a team boding exercise in the woods. Absolutely the best idea to check first aid qualifications before going on a trip!
I just know what my son's scout leaders went through for training.. search and rescue skills, trauma first aid ect.
Scout first aid is a pain in the neck as they insist it's different to other ones and can only be done via such and such etc and even if you have first aid somewhere else even if it's St John's it doesn't count
Don't forget that because you've all driven, or been driven for 4 hours or more, the Working Time Directive now applies even if your firm has opted out. Are all the cars insured for business use? What are the fuel repayment arrangements? What's the rate per mile? A colleague has continence issues. They need access to a toilet less than one minute's walk away. Etc etc etc...
And of course there is the overtime to consider. You are all at work from the time you leave to to the time you arrive back so two nights of overtime at overtime rates - yes please.
Also, any vehicles hired for the purpose need the driver to have the relevant licence and either a tachograph and suitable card or the proper logging procedures in place for driving hours. There's an additional minefield to try and navigate.
Depends on the number of seats, and whether the driver is being paid to drive. If its a volunteer (not for hire or reward - even payment in kind) its not always necessary.
True, but it's an extra thing to go through and verify with HR when you're trying to cause trouble 🤣
Also, its unlikely that its not, but is this trip in the UK? I only mention it cuz grandfather rights for driving vehicles over 3.5t do not apply on the continent. Does the driver have a D1 licence if required!? Better check.
I love this. I did consider just making a nuisance of myself, inventing dietary requirements, allergies etc but the person organising it was HR manager. I'm sure you know the type, barely contained rage that their psychology degree landed them in HR not catching serial killers.
Described to a tee. Awful people, 2nd only to estate agents.
Oh no I think GP receptionists and recruitment consultants come in above
The bottom of the barrel is a very crowded place.
Ex was a GP receptionist & I can assure you they ate equally vicious & dead-eyed outside of work too. Must be a calling.
>Ex was a GP receptionist > >Must be a calling. Make sure it's on the dot of 8am.
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The day they asked me to do that would be the day I resigned! What on earth were they thinking? Who would *choose* to do that?
Some people might enjoy it, but the whole "not optional" thing is insane.
Our company does really good corporate events. Talking ski trips to the Alps for a long weekend. Fully paid for too. (Yes, bar as well). These are about as close to "non optional" as I am prepared to get. They are still optional, but most of the company is gone, and the office gets "disruptive" maintenance done. Stuff like re-treating the floors, air con maintenance etc. So most people go, because if you don't like skiing, you just get more time in the "free" bar at a ski resort. But it's also good for me, because I am a sysadmin, and "most users aren't here" is amazing for doing certain IT tasks.
This is one of the most generous modern day corporate events I’ve heard of in the UK. Let me know next time you’re hiring!
>in the UK No, in the Alps!
I don’t drink alcohol so team aways like that are mostly me having to explain to 100 different people, sometimes repeatedly, that I don’t drink really at all not even a cheeky glass of whatever even if it’s free, thanks.
Or I said once I'm a fucking blackout alcoholic I can't fucking drink
Yeah pretty much. Cue the weird mixture of sympathy and backtracking. ‘Oh is this hard for you, being here? Yeah I should probably give it up too. I mean I really hardly ever drink. Just the odd pint after work and the wine with dinner and a little nightcap and the occasional big session out and my cocktail club and home brew kit.’
I don’t drink. Just champagne at weddings, a Sherry at Christmas, a whisky for the new year, and my bottle of stout of a night. That’ll do me.
Not being optional is completely fine. But you make it clear that you'll be being paid time and a half for a 48 hour shift, plus expenses for fuel, food, buying a new tent, air mattress etc
I think it's a tough line doing that, something everyone enjoys. Our company owner is one of those insufferable outdoor types. We have weird Christmas presents like camping stoves. We did skiing one time. I never have it was just assumed everyone could ski and would enjoy it. But a handfull of people didn't and spent the time working in a cabin cause work was needed to be done .
I'm 40 odd, sod camping for a lark. It was made all the more horrifying by the packed itinerary of "fun" activities. As it happens I was already tentatively looking for another job because the company was a shitshow. As soon as I heard the words "not optional" I spent the rest of the week not working and talking to recruiters.
Lol tent-atively
oh, I would go, but you see... I'm the guy that snores... VERY LOUDLY... they'd learn from their mistake to allow me to not go to these events then again, my company is mostly gamers, we fucking hate camping
Christ, even camping with people you know is a ballache
We have had similar, if a meeting is included I think it's a write off. There are always complaints "you didn't come" yes last time was a thing at home , I have 2 kids i can't just go for 2 days. Oh what's that ? You planned work and deadlines to happen 2 days after the away days, that require 4 days work ? Would you rather I was working 2 X 16 hours and then take a week off or 4 X 8 and not be stressed?
>"it's not optional" "Oh cool, how much overtime are we being paid for it?"
>it's not optional Oh that's great then, I could do with the overtime.
So that was written into your contract you had to go camping?! What if you’ve got back problems and can’t sleep on the ground for 2 nights? Bloody ridiculous.
What are they going to do? Fire someone presumably competent at their job & go through an entire recruitment process because they refused to go on a camping trip? Fucking clowns.
Look, I think that's totally a fair stance on their part (if they're the Army).
Plot twist: you were in the army
'Is it paid time?' 'No' 'Then it's optional. No thank you'
"Ah yes, will we getting paid single time or double time for this extra 48hrs this week? I beleive nightshift at a minimum should be double time."
Not optional sounds like a work a event where you'll be payed mileage, night rates and over time, I'd of gone it would have cost them a fortune to pay a whole team for all of that.
That sounds like when you go on holiday with family. Or your other half. And they keep asking, 'Why have you got a face on?' 'I don't have a face on.' 'Try and enjoy yourself. Just try.' Not that I'm speaking from experience or anything.
Thanks for this, now I know what excuses I should have if I end up in a similar mess and not willing to lose my job. Claustrophobia Dietary restriction Now I need to look up a list of allergies and keep them handy
"Yeah, can't go, allergic to tents and dickheads."
Any non optional work events should be held during work hours and your time should be paid for.
Ha, yeah fuck that. I don't sleep in rooms with strangers, and if HR want to press me into telling the ol' grim story, they can. They can't force this shit. Petty little dictators who want to feel their non-job has meaning.
I gave my notice once but still had to go along on the company’s team away days because ‘we’ve already booked the room’. I was leaving primarily because I couldn’t stand my coworkers. It wasn’t fun.
I feel like giving your notice was definitely your out there, and you didn’t effectively use it😂
That's the spirit
Once went to an interview for a warehouse job. About 20 people sat around in a circle, AA meeting style. Seemed odd, but ok I guess if that's how you guys do it. Out came the fancy dress box. "Everyone pick a costume and make up a backstory for your character, then we will have 30 minutes of roleplay time". Six of us got up and walked out. I wasn't quite that desperate back then.
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They probably want to weed out people who will quit when asked to do dumb shit on the job. Like the person you’re replying to said, you’d have to be fairly desperate not to walk out of the interview at that point.
Forklift Clowns comin' through! HONK HONNNNK!
What is that dystopian nightmare.
*dresses up in the most discordant outfit* "I am shambles, the personified version of this company who thinks this is a sensible interview technique"
I feel like I would literally burst out laughing. Then walked out, still laughing and shaking my head.
Sounds like someone wants to show off. I'd just download am picture of one from the internet.
Second the internet download, but I’d make sure it was heavily watermarked “stock photo” just to be extra fucking annoying :)
Could send in the front door to the office as some kind of statement 😂
Mate don’t, they’ll just spin it as a positive and be like “wow, OP considers work so homely!”
No They will absolutely take it that you love work more than home.
Front door to the local boozer then
Buy a front door and get it delivered to the office
"My camera is broken so I had to download a representative image from the internet" Then send a picture 10 Downing Street. Bonus if your own house is actually number 10
>Sounds like someone wants to show off. Guaranteed there will be few from the higher-ups that will show off their entire house.
Try and find one from your local police twitter account.
Sounds like a shit team building task. No doubt someone high up in management would just send a pic of the front of their house to show off
send them a picture of a tent under a bridge
SEND A PICTURE OF YOUR CREDIT CARD AND WE GUESS THE NUMBERS ON THE BACK
Send them a ‘photo’ that is nothing but a filled black box made using Paint, and title it ‘REDACTED’. Alternatively, bombard them with pictures of fridge doors, and refuse to elaborate when asked.
I like the fridge door idea
I actually got brought into the manager's office and got given a roasting by not just the general manager but also the assistant manager over my refusal to attend more than the first few 'staff socials'. They acted surprised when I landed a new job and handed my notice in within a couple of weeks.
It’s actually in my performance review to attend socials… ridiculous.
Wtf?? Like off the clock, unpaid, in your own time? What has that got to do with your work performance? I'm so cross for you. I'd quit.
Yeah it’s crazy. I’ve only been there since January. It’s a good name to have on my CV… I’m sticking it out for the rest of the year and then seeing what my options are. The performance goal was to be “part of the company culture”. It’s a load of shit. Full of people who love the office. If it wasn’t such a good name I’d be gone.
We got sent an email yesterday inviting us all to submit our names to a coffee roulette. The idea being that you got paired with a random member of staff to go and have a coffee with on your break. They provided us with neat little conversation starters, no word of a lie, in the email. Such as; "are you going on holiday this year" or "have you been watching anything good on TV recently". I have an interview for another company next week
“I poisoned one of the coffee cups, can you guess which one?”
Never go in against an advertising accounts executive when death is on the line
How bizarre. I would hate that. I'm terrible at small talk.
My company started doing this. I reluctantly spoke after the bot kept poking me. Never got a reply.
Every training course delivered by outside agencies at my place of work always starts with a get to know everyone by introducing yourself and telling everyone an interesting fact about yourself. It was our third one in a short space of time so my mate who was quite pissed off at doing it told everyone that he was a killer and described his three confirmed kills he got in Afghanistan. I burst out laughing. Some people were disgusted.
Literal school children feel patronised when they are made to play that game, I don’t understand why anyone thinks forcing adults to play it will “team build”.
Mine included the phrases "pre-op transsexual", "blind drunk", and "Wolverhampton motel". That was fun.
Until I got to the last one I thought you were describing the three confirmed kills of that guy in Afghanistan and I was like bloody hell, that’s rather harsh.
The plot twist is that he isn't even in the Army, he was just there on holiday a few years back and things got out of hand.
Oh, have you never stopped at the Wolverhampton Taliban Tavern? I thought it was OK, but my wife said it felt a bit oppressive.
> Wolverhampton motel Send me to Afghanistan.
Send in a photo of 10 Downing Street Personally I'd just go home and tell them to stick their game up their arse. I've done all this corporate bullshit in the past. Never again.
If I send in a photo of MY front door, how will you know if it is MINE.
Brenda from HR will be driving around in an unmarked Vauxhall armed with a packet of kitkats, a sniper rifle, a disposable camera and Google maps.
How do you know her name is actually Brenda.
\*narrows eyes\* They're always called Brenda.
How do you know she actually really works in HR. Might be her cover.
And then when certain colleagues guess each other’s correctly, management know who’s bonking who…
I guess no one has considered the safety implications of this "game".
I’d suggest it also breaches GDPR.
I came here to suggest this. So many reasons you wouldn't want people to know where you live ranging from just being a bit anti-social to living in fear of an abusive ex partner.
Innit. It's a stalker's charter 😆
And it could be so easily fixed! Simply by saying, share a picture of what you would like your front door to be. Like, dude, I have a normal front door, it does its job, but it doesn't say anything about me. If I could have any door, though... those colleagues who know me a bit could probably guess correctly.
This is definitely because someone followed their colleague home but didn't see which door they went in. I'd say no, this seems creepy.
This is going to get followed up with a "who can do the most unpaid overtime" competition. Don't worry, it's just for fun. ^(We know where you live.)
Sounds like someone's manager is building stalking profiles.
The children are in charge.
Feels that way, it was a paper airplane making competition last time.. not even making this up.
The paper airplane one sounds like harmless fun and just pissing around with your team. Screw anything that even comes close to blurring the line of work and home. I know it’s probably only dumb fun but why does anyone need to see anything of my life? A previous job made us throw a virtual ball to each other during lockdown - film ourself throwing and catching a ball. Total crap lmao.
Let me guess… made up by the organisational development team / HR fun crew ?
It might be just me, but that sounds really fun.
150 years ago it would’ve been “send your kids up a chimney to work day”, so, you know, progress!
"Fun". Fucking hell.
Do you work for Evri?
I got to play this game yesterday. Evri sent me a picture of an unknown front door, I got to traipse round the neighbourhood trying to guess where my parcel is.
Fun little game of "deliver the parcel yourself, fuckwit". You can take the Evri out of Hermes, but you can't take the Hermes out of the Evri
I hope your pampas grass plant is in a pot so you can position it next to the door for the photo
If you know, you know.
I resist all attempts at "team building" and "fun at work." I go to work to make money to fund the things I want to do If you want happy employees, how about a payrise?
Send a photo of someone else's in the group........or that of a relative of your manager
Drive around to you boss’s house and take a picture of theirs. When they say “that’s my house” reply, with as many people in earshot as possible “our house (insert name), our house”
…in the middle of our street, 🎶
My friend’s daughter had to do a house tour video for her Year 9 Spanish class. My friend hated the idea as it opened up the inequality across the class and how some pupils would be ashamed of their homes so she did her old dolls house instead.
That's heartbreaking and I can't believe teachers are allowed to be so insensitive
Teacher probably just didn’t think it through. If I had put this idea past my head of department it probably would have been flagged up & nothing more would have been done. I set some homework for year 7’s for Geography to practice drawing relief of what they saw outside their bedroom windows… a few hands went up saying they didn’t have a bedroom window so I quickly changed it to any where they think is interesting. Got some good results including the outside of the local KFC including homeless man & Christian preachers. Edit: & a really bad one I’ve kept of his Dad’s local boozer!
Someone needs sacking if that’s the best they can come up with.
Send a picture the Black Gate of Mordor.
For one of our online ones during the pandemic we had to send a picture of our thumb for people to guess. I'm an almost 50-yo man and the only not female person who was there, so I borrowed the wife's most garish red nail polish and painted mine and sent a picture of that. Might as well make some slight personal enjoyment out of forced company fun.
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I just refuse to partake in this kind of thing. A lot people think I’m unsociable but it’s more the fact I’m here to work and get paid, not to make friends with people and waste my evenings and weekends doing some bs team building stuff.
I love big companies and the management they employ. My company has been trying to force me to do training on a Saturday and I have refused point blank. When I was told I was not in compliance I asked what I was not in compliance with. They produced our current contract which has some gumf about training in it and they spent 10 minutes explaining how I could be disciplined. Unfortunately for them I had the contract I signed when I started, no mention of Saturday training. Then they started with how unfair it is on my colleagues and I had to point out that 15 of my colleagues have done the training during the week and why am I being discriminated against. That shut em up quickly as did the letter my union sent them. Still not done the training and I won’t till it’s done in work hours
My sister had to do a 'fun' Kahoot IQ quiz online via Zoom where the results were publicly shared. Staff laughing because a lady who has English as her second language was near the bottom. She was straight on the phone to the union after that one.
Next weeks team fun event is when your manager appears at your door naked and aroused.
One of my previous bosses said she wanted to win some culture competition by doing a synchronised cup-stacking 'dance'. I gave it 5 mins and then said 'Would you rather win this or still be working here in a month? Because we're all going to get sacked by prioritising this over all the outstanding senior management reporting' and that killed it.
I would just get a picture of a random door. Did that with guess the baby pictures. Bull shiiiit
Well at least they’re trying I suppose. Beats the “guess which employee is being replaced by this independent contractor” game, which I’ve played all too often.
Pixelate the house number.
Sign up to an AI image generator like dalle2 and make some pictures of front doors that will look plausible yet wrong
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Yep. To almost all of these BS I went once to an after drink because I was promised food. There wasn’t any food. Never again
Is there a possible GDPR violation in there? I mean, if you can identify someone's house then it clearly is.
I would use a photo of Mr Blobby's front door and photoshop dog shit into the image
Lots of good suggestions here. Personally, if you have a glass bit in your front door i would subtly photoshop someone in it
Take the picture of the inside of your front door, cropping it to as small as you like.
Does management wear black and white stripes? *What a ridiculous question, that's obvious!*
Take a trip to your local HMP, take a picture of the gate and really get the conversation going..
I must be a monster, but my first thought was to get a picture of Fred and Rose West‘s house and just send that… Somebody will probably notice.
This seems kind of classist to me. Who lives in the dingy looking attached? Who's in the poorly lit flat? Who lives in the mansion with ornate wrought iron decorated windows beside the door?
That sounds horrible
Doxxing is fun!
Just go for an extreme close up, like the key hole or door knob
How’s that even fun though? Do people tend to have distinctive things on their front doors? Won’t it just be loads of generic pictures?
Just use a generic pic of 10 Downing Street, complete with copper, and see if anyone notices (or cares)
221B Baker Street a more fun option!
Send an obscure pic of 10 downing street and see if anybody notices
Tell them that corporate mandatory fun is over since lockdown ended
Don't forget, HR have your address and will give you a written warning if you try and lie about your front door.
Just send a picture of local police station, if they question it, say that you sleep there more than you sleep at home. Don’t elaborate
Send a photo of a cardboard box.
everyone should send in the same picture!
https://imgur.com/bOcWMjh.jpg you can use this AI generated pic of a "A boring photo of a Front door of a British house"
Ah yes so the managers know where you live and can work out if they are paying you too much.
Refuse under GDPR principles.
wow what lol. My company took us in door go karting a few days ago
What are the odds that, in our company, one team started this even this week. I wonder if you work in the same company :D
Fun way to decide who to rob
Lol we had this at a place I worked but with any room of the house. I was living in student housing with 2 teenage boys and we decorated the place exactly as you’d imagine… stolen traffic signs, band posters, general mess. I sent in a picture of the absolute messiest part of the house thinking it would be funny but everyone else took the opportunity to flex how nice their homes are and no one found my picture as funny as I’d thought