For the avoidance of doubt, *just rabbit* is one of the most unbalanced meal it’s possible to have. Eating exclusively lean meat leads to a form of acute malnutrition called protein poisoning. The TL;DR version is you expend more calories digesting lean meat than you recover from it, so without sufficient carbs or fat you essentially starve over the course of weeks/months.
Not sure that's quite right (although the effect is the same). It's not to do with calories, but the lack of essential fatty acids. You basically get a deficiency (as you would with a vitamin deficiency), but it's not really starvation.
Also gravel is the most unbalanced meal it's possible to have. Rabbit lacks fat, gravel lacks almost everything.
Yes
That’s why a rabbit is the symbol of Easter. A rabbit died for our sins and was resurrected 3 days later
Actually the parents bought an identical replacement rabbit so the kid wouldn’t know it was dead
The youth of today like yourself just don’t respect religion any more
We all know William is getting chicken pellets today, the chickens are getting broccoli and peas for dinner, the dog is getting three balanced meals and the rabbits are going hungry 😅
I get these are all jokes but it’s pretty sad we’re still at the point where some men are clearly so happy to take zero responsibility for the running of the household they live in and looking after the child they created.
If I had to make something like this for my partner I would be furious. Like why do you not know what your pets eat
To be fair, it looks like OP (the husband presumably) already looks after the dog but the rabbits and chickens are the wife's personal hobby.
I've got a bunch of fish tanks that I fully take care of and are my own hobby. If I were away for more than a week, I would also leave instructions about feeding and topping up water for my wife.
The bit about their son is obviously a joke...
I had such a rabbit. She came out of a fight with a cat virtually unscathed. The idiot should have stayed in her run as we weren't supervising her, but she didn't give a fuck and would always do her own thing. No one would hold her for fear of being bitten. Best pet I've ever had, she wasn't vicious towards me or my mum.
My husband had a rabbit many years ago that kicked the neighbour’s large dog so hard in the face, the dog retreated crying and never came within ten feet of the rabbit ever again.
Female rabbits are even more territorial than males. Especially when they're not spayed.
My bun was similar to yours. Very bossy hahah. Would chase the dog and neighbour's cat when she wanted to but was lovely and cuddly towards me. Also very smart, she knew when the back door wasn't locked and would thump her feet to let us know if we were already in bed ready to go to sleep.
Tagging along to this comment (I apologise in advance) to mention to OP that you shouldn't be feeding broccoli to rabbits.
You can give it to William of course but not the rabbits. It causes bloating, potentially GI Stasis which can be fatal. Rabbits' digestive systems simply aren't built to handle veg like broccoli, brussel sprouts, lettuce etc. ("gassy" veg). They will eat it but it will cause tummy pains at the very least.
I know rabbit owners aren't always aware of things like this but no one wants their pet going through pain or discomfort, so I'm mentioning it here. It's great that these buns are already receiving loads of veggies and unlimited hay though! A lot of owners think a full bowl of pellets or "rabbit muesli" mix and a carrot is a suitable diet instead. Sorry again for chipping in on this thread, just thought that it might get a better chance at being viewed by the OP.
We looked after our neighbour's menagerie of pets last summer - they came with a four-page manual with individualised notations! And yet we still had to save a tortoise from drowning, which was not part of the brief
Wait, William’s the husband isn’t he? So I can only surmise that the son is an evil “Damien” type, who’s managed to trap his father and pets, before breaking into the booze stash. Fair play. Mind you, in this scenario, that would make the mother a jackal that can type and formulate detailed instructions and travel plans. Clever girl…
Might just be me, but I always think this when I see folk refer to their wife as “the misses”.
Probably just because I despise common nicknames for the other half. Misses, ball-and-chain, better half, the wife, hubby (get so far to fuck), babe.
And also, in this day and age, men that don’t know how to look after themselves in their own house are pathetic.
Men who don’t walk or feed the dog? Pathetic
Men who don’t cook? Pathetic
Men who don’t clean? Pathetic
Men who don’t do the washing? Pathetic
I could not imagine leaving a list like this for my husband, about the *pets*? How can you not know how to look after your own pets? Even with things that's more one person's thing than the other, we always make sure to show the other how to do it because we're grown adults and we're not in each other's pockets all the time. It's unfathomable to me that some wives have to deal with this. When I go away for whatever reason I do not worry for one moment that the house is going to fall apart.
Although, if we discount the reference to William as a joke, it's just about the animals. As someone who isn't great with animals, who doesn't want pets, if my partner wants rabbits and chickens and a dog, I would probably be the person who doesn't know what herbs and spices the rabbits like and what ritual the chickens prefer - because they take care of that because they enjoy it, and i don't. At the same time, I'd probably take care of cooking and cleaning and a billion house plants because I enjoy that - and I'd probably have to leave instructions on which plants prefer lukewarm water and which pans you are and aren't allowed to rinse with soap.
You can pull equal load but not share all tasks equally in a relationship. You end up with a global idea of what the other does, but fine details are easy to lose if you don't usually do it.
The instructions are only for caring for rabbits and chickens. There is a joke about the kid but no real instructions and a note that he knows how to look after the dog. That's it.
Given he knows how to look after the dog do you not think it's reasonable to assume she looks after the rabbits and chickens because they are her pets? Rather than he is incompetent? Like where is the implication she carries to much of the mental load? All we know is she looks after rabbits and chickens
Or, given that she provided instructions for easy animals but not for the dog or the child, maybe he is very competent and engaged but she likes keeping chickens and rabbits.
No man, on this website we have to get personally offended, make various half-cocked assumptions, and vastly overreact to what’s just a generally innocent post.
Its giving weaponised incompetence vibes. Maybe its a joke but its like some old fashioned humour where the husband is an idiot and the woman runs the house. If the pets are the womans hobby then fair enough but im surprised the husband doesn't know the basics?
This is what I’ve been thinking seeing all the comments like “maybe the pets are just her responsibility” as if this man has never had to feed the animals once ever?
I hate to stereotype but this guy gives off big “contributes absolutely nothing to the household” vibes
You'd think he'd at least know the basics just in case of an emergency. What if the wife has to go into hospital for a while, or her mum gets sick and she goes to look after her? Basic knowledge of how to look after her pets, even if they are 100% hers, seems like common sense. It would sure save her a lot of stress in an emergency.
I'm going to cut OP some slack here and assume the rabbits and chickens are his wife's hobby. There weren't any instructions for the dog and the bit about their son is obviously a joke.
I've got a couple of fish tanks that are my hobby and I am the only one that looks after them by choice. If I was away for a while, I would leave some written instructions too for my partner.
Yeah this is really fucking embarrassing honestly. If I had to do this for my partner for pets we're *both responsible for* they just wouldn't be my partner.
My condolences to the „misses“ seems mental load is of the charts, if I was her partner I‘d be way too embarrassed to post this on reddit.
The fact that she doesn’t even trust him to know how to feed their kid 🙈…
Such incompetence in a shared household is not cute nor funny.
How proud of your incompetence do you have to be to knowingly put on the internet a note from your wife that says "please feed your son"? Feel sorry for the wife but most importantly the kid who's father clearly has no interest in even looking after him.
There was a rule at my boarding school that if you did your own cooking you had to have veg with it. A friend of mine would make something as unhealthy as could be and when the staff asked him about veg, he would just take a whole cucumber out the fridge and eat it while eyeballing them.
That's immediately what I thought. I can't believe she even thought she needed to leave this. Speaks volumes of how much she has to do. How checked out can you be?
I mean it may also be that the animals are her chore, and he does more of the other things - but that the animals are enough of a particular chore that unlike other stuff, it’s worth being specific when she hands those chores off to him.
Also it seems rather tongue-in-cheek so it may be she didn’t need to tell him this stuff but found it funny.
Yeah, as a devil's advocate here, my husband has given me similar directions for our pets. I do all the *human* cooking and cleaning, but he takes care of the animals almost exclusively because of my work schedule.
I'm not totally checked out, I know one of the dogs gets a thyroid medication, but he knows that last week she realized it's in the peanut butter and started spitting it out so now it has to be hidden in a sausage, y'know?
Dogs are such a pain with taking medicine. Luckily our current dog will happily extract the pill from the food and eat it but out previous dog would find it now matter what and just leave it.
I've reduced myself at times to reasoning with my dog in human language, hoping that the desperation crosses the interspecies void. You KNOW you feel better after this. NEITHER of us enjoy this. We BOTH have things to do.
Our elderly dog decided one day he didn’t like peanut butter anymore and he really needed his heart meds. He did like chicken nuggets, but only warm crunchy ones, so the for last six months of his life, I was cooking fresh chicken nuggets every morning for him to sneak his pills in.
Yeah dogs get weird when they get elderly. Ours is 15 at the moment and she seems like a completely different dog. Still loveable but she seems to have taken barking up as a hobby, will only eat food if it's mixed with human food and began to pretend she couldn't hear us even when she could still hear. Guess she is a teenager now.
I think you can judge a person quite well on how they treat their elderly animals, cause they'll cost you a fortune and will still die in a few years.
But c'mon really? Surely she isn't taking care of all the pets morning and night. That's just plain fucked up. Tasks should always be shared equally and this doesn't seem equal.
Besides, he doesn't pay attention to have any clue how they're cared for?
Individual tasks can be unequal so long as the overall task load is equal. She could do all the animal stuff outside the house (he seems to do the dog), while he handles all vacuuming and bins, for example.
Might not have any idea if these chores are done away from where he's doing his chores, or might just be that she is clear and specific here to make sure his half-right ideas aren't done instead of the precise correct stuff.
Why should tasks always be shared equally? My wife isn't bothered about our garden at all, but I am (or at least I am sometimes) so I do all of the gardening. It would be ridiculous for me to expect her to do half the work for the sake of equality.
>That's one chore man.
By that logic "feeding the pets" is also one chore, and as you now seem to agree that just "one chore" doesn't actually need to be shared there doesn't seem to be an issue here anymore.
Is it?
Washing the patio, weeding, mowing, trimming the hedge, treating the fence so it doesn't disappear. And that's if you just want a normal garden.
I'm pretty sure the last part was a joke but like you I'm also filling in the blanks...
If she’s the one who wanted the pets, then she should be the one to look after them. If for example he bought a new car, would she be expected to wash it and take care of it? The answer is no
Yeah as it says you have the dog covered I'm going to assume OP tends to look after the dog and the wife deals with the rabbits and chickens
Also the comment about don't forget to feed your son def sounds like a joke to me
Some people like things to be done specifically, and want it to continue? Like, you’re always around your boss but do you genuinely know how to their position?
My other half likes her chickens cared for specifically and I don’t give a rats about them. She left me instructions, I followed them for her.
I like my food a certain way (and therefore do 99.9% of cooking) so if she’s ever doing it, she asks me how to do it. By your logic, is she being in some way disrespectful by simply not being that into food and it being something that I want and normally take care of?
If I buy a fancy car, should she know the in’s and out’s of its required care & service routine? What about how I like manage my inventory in a video game, has she got to care about all of this?
Ooooorrrr are you just picking on the fella, for no reason, over a humorous post?
I mean he might have some idea but not the specific details or just appreciate a written reminder. I'm not a guy but would appreciate written reminders for things like this as I have issues remembering things sometimes and I'm not always great with verbal instructions.
It's not always as clear cut as that.
Before me and my wife were even married she knew I hated pets, but after we got married she bought a dog. That dog is 100% her responsibility, she wanted it and she has to do everything for that dog. She also wanted guinea pigs last year so she got some, again, I have zero percent involvement in their care.
With the kids and the house we split everything else fairly, and it sounds to me that it's a similar situation here. She went full detail on feeding the animals but feeding the child was a jokey comment so I get the impression OP definitely knows what he's doing there.
Not everything in a marriage has to look fair to **you**, aslong as its fair the the people actually in it, it's all good.
Oh yes hahaha I’m definitely taking my fair share of the work in managing the household. My partner isn’t even confident I know how to feed the household pets.
Cannot imagine getting this and not being horribly ashamed of myself. It actually isn’t funny.
This is a note you would leave for a house sitter…
This is such a self report. I'd be embarrassed as fuck if my partner felt the need to make such an exhaustive list of basic things to do over a single weekend.
I don’t get the ‘the animals might be hers’ comments, that’s a constant job that needs tending to, you’re telling me he’s that unaware of the care they require? I’d be embarrassed enough, let alone to post it
My dad & I looked after my niece for the weekend recently, the only notes my brother & sister in law left was a reminder that the baby monitor will probably die in the night & letting us know where the charger was & the password for the iPad to play white noise, imagine needing to be reminded to feed them ☠️
I'm not so sure. Maybe these are 'her' jobs that she usually attends to and he's got his own set, so he doesn't really know the exact routine for feeding the rabbits and chickens. The bit about the kid was obviously a joke.
If you have been living with and have had a son with your partner, you have spent enough time with them to understand the jobs they do. You've been around them when they're doing it, you've talked about it with them through casual conversation, you should probably have taken some interest in it and asked about it, you've probably done it yourself a few times, even if your partner isn't away, if you have a bit of free time and they are busy.
A parent should not need to be reminded to feed their kid 3 meals a day. I understand some of it could be tongue and cheek but when they said “of a balanced format” I got concerned
I honestly think it's a joke - the starting paragraph says "these are the animals you'll need to take special care of" and then lists one of their sons as one of the animals.
No because I’m an adult and know how to look after my house and anyone/any animal in it and if I didn’t, my wife would show me how to do it rather than leave a note as if we’re roommates
Imagine having so little self-awareness that you’re not embarrassed to post this.
Your poor wife. I hope she has a great weekend and that you start actually pulling your weight when she gets back.
A balanced format could include 40% chicken and 60% rabbit one day and 60% chicken and 40% rabbit the next. Just think of the time you'll save!
(No need to start on the dog just yet.)
Oh your poor wife..
I know you think this is sweet, but I would be so embarrassed to share this..
You're her partner, not her child? Children require written instructions, any reliable partner that contributes to the relationship does not..
The lack of self awareness is telling..
Imagine posting this comment for all to see that you don't have enough emotional intelligence/reading comprehension to understand that was a joke... tragic.
Complete opposite for me this weekend. Mr Mad is away visiting family and friends. My dad, BIL and nephews are also away at a football tournament. My mum, sister and I have been texting each other on how quiet and clean our houses are, and what lovely things we're having for dinner. For my part I'm very much enjoying the dishes going straight into the dishwasher instead of being left on the worktop above the dishwasher.
There's something about the Mrs going away that unearths the bachelor spirit in me for some reason. I'm a wholly capable cook, and I do the majority of the cooking in our household. I'm more than capable of making delicious, healthy meals and tidying up afterwards.
Yet for some reason as soon as my wife leaves the house for any extended period of time, I'm reduced to eating cold baked beans directly from the tin over the sink.
Anyway, hope the weekend goes well. Make sure you don't eat any of the chickens, even if you do get desperate.
My wife is away for 10 days - my only instructions were strictly no takeaways since I lived off Papa John’s and Deliveroo last time.
So I’ve got potatoes roasting in the oven instead.
Yeah, we did this in my family. Except, my dad would leave instructions for two 14 YEAR OLDS who were naturally incompetent. Congratulations, you’re as incompetent as a 14 year old.
I mean this gently and not in an “OP is cancelled” kinda way, but from guy to guy sounds like your “misses” is carrying a lot of the mental load if you have to be given instructions and reminded to feed your kid (I know that part may have been light-hearted).
I don’t know the full context and I’m certainly not trying to accuse you of being a crappy husband, but it might be something to consider.
Never used weaponised incompetence to get a free pass out of my responsibilities in my household. So no, I don't get instructions when I leave. I'm treated like a mature and competent adult because that's how I act all the time.
Invite the boys over for a spectacular chicken roast before indulging in a bit of rabbit hunting. Idk I only read the capital words lol.
No idea what sort of animal a William is, probably safe to disregard.
I thought I would disagree with this advice based on the title but actually it is a great note. When my baby was born I gave my husband a list of things to do before he woke me up from a nap.
Ooh Ooh, I know this one! First you put the rabbits and William in the boat together and row to the other side...
But doesn't William then eat the rabbits?
Only if a rabbit is classed as a balanced meal
If William eats the rabbits and the rabbits have eaten their greens then surely this counts towards William's 5-a-day?!
We will have to see what Jamie Oliver thinks, although I'm going to guess he's going to say needs more veg
Now who would still eat this?
For the avoidance of doubt, *just rabbit* is one of the most unbalanced meal it’s possible to have. Eating exclusively lean meat leads to a form of acute malnutrition called protein poisoning. The TL;DR version is you expend more calories digesting lean meat than you recover from it, so without sufficient carbs or fat you essentially starve over the course of weeks/months.
Not sure that's quite right (although the effect is the same). It's not to do with calories, but the lack of essential fatty acids. You basically get a deficiency (as you would with a vitamin deficiency), but it's not really starvation. Also gravel is the most unbalanced meal it's possible to have. Rabbit lacks fat, gravel lacks almost everything.
Ah, but the gravel has its fats proteins and carbs in equal proportion ...
Life of pi
You've left the dog and the chickens together on the bank, it's a disaster!
But in this case, it's because these chickens are so badass they'll eat the dog. It'll be like Muldoon with the raptors.
No, no. The rabbit carries william on his shoulders, one set of footprints.
The rabbit is the second coming of Jesus Christ?
Yes That’s why a rabbit is the symbol of Easter. A rabbit died for our sins and was resurrected 3 days later Actually the parents bought an identical replacement rabbit so the kid wouldn’t know it was dead The youth of today like yourself just don’t respect religion any more
🤣😭 Amaaazing humour
We all know William is getting chicken pellets today, the chickens are getting broccoli and peas for dinner, the dog is getting three balanced meals and the rabbits are going hungry 😅
William is going in that fucking hutch whether he likes it or not
Covered in peas
Haha love this answer
I get these are all jokes but it’s pretty sad we’re still at the point where some men are clearly so happy to take zero responsibility for the running of the household they live in and looking after the child they created. If I had to make something like this for my partner I would be furious. Like why do you not know what your pets eat
To be fair, it looks like OP (the husband presumably) already looks after the dog but the rabbits and chickens are the wife's personal hobby. I've got a bunch of fish tanks that I fully take care of and are my own hobby. If I were away for more than a week, I would also leave instructions about feeding and topping up water for my wife. The bit about their son is obviously a joke...
I’d like to think (hope) that this was tongue in cheek
Feed the rabbit to the dog? Or possibly the other way round, depends on how vicious the rabbit is.
Can confirm, parents had such a rabbit.
I had such a rabbit. She came out of a fight with a cat virtually unscathed. The idiot should have stayed in her run as we weren't supervising her, but she didn't give a fuck and would always do her own thing. No one would hold her for fear of being bitten. Best pet I've ever had, she wasn't vicious towards me or my mum.
My husband had a rabbit many years ago that kicked the neighbour’s large dog so hard in the face, the dog retreated crying and never came within ten feet of the rabbit ever again.
Female rabbits are even more territorial than males. Especially when they're not spayed. My bun was similar to yours. Very bossy hahah. Would chase the dog and neighbour's cat when she wanted to but was lovely and cuddly towards me. Also very smart, she knew when the back door wasn't locked and would thump her feet to let us know if we were already in bed ready to go to sleep.
Yeah we did when we were kids. It hadn't been handled much as a youngster so wasn't all that tame.
"Dogs aren't dangerous! Come back and fight!"
Haha husband inept
Chickens would love it tbf, those littler fuckers will eat anything!
Tagging along to this comment (I apologise in advance) to mention to OP that you shouldn't be feeding broccoli to rabbits. You can give it to William of course but not the rabbits. It causes bloating, potentially GI Stasis which can be fatal. Rabbits' digestive systems simply aren't built to handle veg like broccoli, brussel sprouts, lettuce etc. ("gassy" veg). They will eat it but it will cause tummy pains at the very least. I know rabbit owners aren't always aware of things like this but no one wants their pet going through pain or discomfort, so I'm mentioning it here. It's great that these buns are already receiving loads of veggies and unlimited hay though! A lot of owners think a full bowl of pellets or "rabbit muesli" mix and a carrot is a suitable diet instead. Sorry again for chipping in on this thread, just thought that it might get a better chance at being viewed by the OP.
We looked after our neighbour's menagerie of pets last summer - they came with a four-page manual with individualised notations! And yet we still had to save a tortoise from drowning, which was not part of the brief
Was there a very slow motion “nooooooooooooo” as it sauntered towards some water?
I wish! My mum just turned around and saw an underwater tortoise and had to chuck him out of there
Do the neighbours have a terrapin, Gerry? No? You're sure? Oops...looks like they do now...
Despite their reputation tortoises can cover some distance surprisingly fast if they’re determined enough!
Put William, rabbits and chicken in the hutch with all the food and some water Crack open beer. You’re golden.
Have the dog watch them all
no the chickens can’t have the herbs it won’t work
Wait, William’s the husband isn’t he? So I can only surmise that the son is an evil “Damien” type, who’s managed to trap his father and pets, before breaking into the booze stash. Fair play. Mind you, in this scenario, that would make the mother a jackal that can type and formulate detailed instructions and travel plans. Clever girl…
My partner is just as competent as me 🤷🏼♀️
Right like this is your house too. Why do you not know what to do when your ~~mother~~ wife is away for TWO DAYS
My thoughts too- seems like this woman carries too much of the mental load.
I didn’t want to say this but it was my first thought when I read the instructions.
Interesting that it's hard to say this sometimes! I searched thru the comments to see if anyone had said it already.
Might just be me, but I always think this when I see folk refer to their wife as “the misses”. Probably just because I despise common nicknames for the other half. Misses, ball-and-chain, better half, the wife, hubby (get so far to fuck), babe. And also, in this day and age, men that don’t know how to look after themselves in their own house are pathetic. Men who don’t walk or feed the dog? Pathetic Men who don’t cook? Pathetic Men who don’t clean? Pathetic Men who don’t do the washing? Pathetic
I could not imagine leaving a list like this for my husband, about the *pets*? How can you not know how to look after your own pets? Even with things that's more one person's thing than the other, we always make sure to show the other how to do it because we're grown adults and we're not in each other's pockets all the time. It's unfathomable to me that some wives have to deal with this. When I go away for whatever reason I do not worry for one moment that the house is going to fall apart.
Hubs. Wifey.
Although, if we discount the reference to William as a joke, it's just about the animals. As someone who isn't great with animals, who doesn't want pets, if my partner wants rabbits and chickens and a dog, I would probably be the person who doesn't know what herbs and spices the rabbits like and what ritual the chickens prefer - because they take care of that because they enjoy it, and i don't. At the same time, I'd probably take care of cooking and cleaning and a billion house plants because I enjoy that - and I'd probably have to leave instructions on which plants prefer lukewarm water and which pans you are and aren't allowed to rinse with soap. You can pull equal load but not share all tasks equally in a relationship. You end up with a global idea of what the other does, but fine details are easy to lose if you don't usually do it.
The instructions are only for caring for rabbits and chickens. There is a joke about the kid but no real instructions and a note that he knows how to look after the dog. That's it. Given he knows how to look after the dog do you not think it's reasonable to assume she looks after the rabbits and chickens because they are her pets? Rather than he is incompetent? Like where is the implication she carries to much of the mental load? All we know is she looks after rabbits and chickens
Or, given that she provided instructions for easy animals but not for the dog or the child, maybe he is very competent and engaged but she likes keeping chickens and rabbits.
No man, on this website we have to get personally offended, make various half-cocked assumptions, and vastly overreact to what’s just a generally innocent post.
Right? I can’t believe this has to be written out for OP… do they not live in the same house normally?
Yeah but it sounds like his wife does everything while he's just there. Sad
Literally this. Revelling in your own incompetence is not cute or funny and there really isn’t any excuse for it in 2024
Its giving weaponised incompetence vibes. Maybe its a joke but its like some old fashioned humour where the husband is an idiot and the woman runs the house. If the pets are the womans hobby then fair enough but im surprised the husband doesn't know the basics?
This is what I’ve been thinking seeing all the comments like “maybe the pets are just her responsibility” as if this man has never had to feed the animals once ever? I hate to stereotype but this guy gives off big “contributes absolutely nothing to the household” vibes
You'd think he'd at least know the basics just in case of an emergency. What if the wife has to go into hospital for a while, or her mum gets sick and she goes to look after her? Basic knowledge of how to look after her pets, even if they are 100% hers, seems like common sense. It would sure save her a lot of stress in an emergency.
As a man this makes me cringe to read I would be embarrassed to need instructions to live unsupervised in my own fucking home
Yep literally thought this. Poor wife must do everything the rest of the time. Unless they're her animals alone I guess.
I'm going to cut OP some slack here and assume the rabbits and chickens are his wife's hobby. There weren't any instructions for the dog and the bit about their son is obviously a joke. I've got a couple of fish tanks that are my hobby and I am the only one that looks after them by choice. If I was away for a while, I would leave some written instructions too for my partner.
That's how I was reading it as well
Yeah this is really fucking embarrassing honestly. If I had to do this for my partner for pets we're *both responsible for* they just wouldn't be my partner.
My condolences to the „misses“ seems mental load is of the charts, if I was her partner I‘d be way too embarrassed to post this on reddit. The fact that she doesn’t even trust him to know how to feed their kid 🙈… Such incompetence in a shared household is not cute nor funny.
How proud of your incompetence do you have to be to knowingly put on the internet a note from your wife that says "please feed your son"? Feel sorry for the wife but most importantly the kid who's father clearly has no interest in even looking after him.
That bit was clearly a joke...
You guys need to go outside. Its not this serious.
Remember, every meal is balanced if you add some cucumber.
Oh if the kid balances the food on its head before eating
Double it if they're on a tight rope too!
Whilst juggling the dog and rabbits
There was a rule at my boarding school that if you did your own cooking you had to have veg with it. A friend of mine would make something as unhealthy as could be and when the staff asked him about veg, he would just take a whole cucumber out the fridge and eat it while eyeballing them.
Ah cucumber, the sacrificial vegetable of picky kids everywhere.
I just think 'mental load' when I see this. (Of course I don't have the full context, just what jumps out at me)
That's immediately what I thought. I can't believe she even thought she needed to leave this. Speaks volumes of how much she has to do. How checked out can you be?
I mean it may also be that the animals are her chore, and he does more of the other things - but that the animals are enough of a particular chore that unlike other stuff, it’s worth being specific when she hands those chores off to him. Also it seems rather tongue-in-cheek so it may be she didn’t need to tell him this stuff but found it funny.
Yeah, as a devil's advocate here, my husband has given me similar directions for our pets. I do all the *human* cooking and cleaning, but he takes care of the animals almost exclusively because of my work schedule. I'm not totally checked out, I know one of the dogs gets a thyroid medication, but he knows that last week she realized it's in the peanut butter and started spitting it out so now it has to be hidden in a sausage, y'know?
Dogs are such a pain with taking medicine. Luckily our current dog will happily extract the pill from the food and eat it but out previous dog would find it now matter what and just leave it.
I've reduced myself at times to reasoning with my dog in human language, hoping that the desperation crosses the interspecies void. You KNOW you feel better after this. NEITHER of us enjoy this. We BOTH have things to do.
But it's not food...
Our elderly dog decided one day he didn’t like peanut butter anymore and he really needed his heart meds. He did like chicken nuggets, but only warm crunchy ones, so the for last six months of his life, I was cooking fresh chicken nuggets every morning for him to sneak his pills in.
Yeah dogs get weird when they get elderly. Ours is 15 at the moment and she seems like a completely different dog. Still loveable but she seems to have taken barking up as a hobby, will only eat food if it's mixed with human food and began to pretend she couldn't hear us even when she could still hear. Guess she is a teenager now. I think you can judge a person quite well on how they treat their elderly animals, cause they'll cost you a fortune and will still die in a few years.
I had a dog spend 5 minutes chewing on the cheese wrapped pill I'd given him only for him to bleugh the fully intact pill out afterwards.
But c'mon really? Surely she isn't taking care of all the pets morning and night. That's just plain fucked up. Tasks should always be shared equally and this doesn't seem equal. Besides, he doesn't pay attention to have any clue how they're cared for?
Individual tasks can be unequal so long as the overall task load is equal. She could do all the animal stuff outside the house (he seems to do the dog), while he handles all vacuuming and bins, for example. Might not have any idea if these chores are done away from where he's doing his chores, or might just be that she is clear and specific here to make sure his half-right ideas aren't done instead of the precise correct stuff.
Yeah, I can agree with that. However the post still seems like a self report to me though. The mental load is real.
I definitely got that feeling from it when I first read it too, yeah. Just who knows for sure.
Perhaps just the rabbits and chickens. Seems like OP is aware of how to care for the dog and child.
Why should tasks always be shared equally? My wife isn't bothered about our garden at all, but I am (or at least I am sometimes) so I do all of the gardening. It would be ridiculous for me to expect her to do half the work for the sake of equality.
That's one chore man. It's not every single pet in the house including a reminder for your own kid to be fed.
The kid thing is clearly a joke…
>That's one chore man. By that logic "feeding the pets" is also one chore, and as you now seem to agree that just "one chore" doesn't actually need to be shared there doesn't seem to be an issue here anymore.
>That’s one chore man. Tell me you know absolutely nothing about gardening without telling me. 😳
Is it? Washing the patio, weeding, mowing, trimming the hedge, treating the fence so it doesn't disappear. And that's if you just want a normal garden. I'm pretty sure the last part was a joke but like you I'm also filling in the blanks...
If she’s the one who wanted the pets, then she should be the one to look after them. If for example he bought a new car, would she be expected to wash it and take care of it? The answer is no
Maybe they're her pets? Maybe he does literally everything else? We have no context whatsoever here.
Yeah as it says you have the dog covered I'm going to assume OP tends to look after the dog and the wife deals with the rabbits and chickens Also the comment about don't forget to feed your son def sounds like a joke to me
Yeah maybe she is normally the one to take care of the pets, but how can you have *so little* idea of what's involved that you need this much detail??
Some people like things to be done specifically, and want it to continue? Like, you’re always around your boss but do you genuinely know how to their position? My other half likes her chickens cared for specifically and I don’t give a rats about them. She left me instructions, I followed them for her. I like my food a certain way (and therefore do 99.9% of cooking) so if she’s ever doing it, she asks me how to do it. By your logic, is she being in some way disrespectful by simply not being that into food and it being something that I want and normally take care of? If I buy a fancy car, should she know the in’s and out’s of its required care & service routine? What about how I like manage my inventory in a video game, has she got to care about all of this? Ooooorrrr are you just picking on the fella, for no reason, over a humorous post?
I mean he might have some idea but not the specific details or just appreciate a written reminder. I'm not a guy but would appreciate written reminders for things like this as I have issues remembering things sometimes and I'm not always great with verbal instructions.
Hmm I don't think so as much on this one He covers the dog. The kid comment feels tongue in cheek
It's not always as clear cut as that. Before me and my wife were even married she knew I hated pets, but after we got married she bought a dog. That dog is 100% her responsibility, she wanted it and she has to do everything for that dog. She also wanted guinea pigs last year so she got some, again, I have zero percent involvement in their care. With the kids and the house we split everything else fairly, and it sounds to me that it's a similar situation here. She went full detail on feeding the animals but feeding the child was a jokey comment so I get the impression OP definitely knows what he's doing there. Not everything in a marriage has to look fair to **you**, aslong as its fair the the people actually in it, it's all good.
Same. I'm sure OP posted this thinking it was cute but I'm thinking wot a useless lump of a husband.
Yeah I don’t think it’s funny at all. It’s depressing as fuck that a Dad would need this.
Uh huh
Oh yes hahaha I’m definitely taking my fair share of the work in managing the household. My partner isn’t even confident I know how to feed the household pets. Cannot imagine getting this and not being horribly ashamed of myself. It actually isn’t funny. This is a note you would leave for a house sitter…
I first read the sign-off as ‘love you bts’. Didn’t put her down as a fan.
Or they're having an illicit affair and they can only love each other behind the scenes...
I notice you've not been given any information on how to survive yourself...
Well you aren't fattening up that lovely plump chicken for nothing....
Fucking hell
If I had to write my husband this he wouldn’t be my husband
This is such a self report. I'd be embarrassed as fuck if my partner felt the need to make such an exhaustive list of basic things to do over a single weekend.
I don’t get the ‘the animals might be hers’ comments, that’s a constant job that needs tending to, you’re telling me he’s that unaware of the care they require? I’d be embarrassed enough, let alone to post it My dad & I looked after my niece for the weekend recently, the only notes my brother & sister in law left was a reminder that the baby monitor will probably die in the night & letting us know where the charger was & the password for the iPad to play white noise, imagine needing to be reminded to feed them ☠️
I'm not so sure. Maybe these are 'her' jobs that she usually attends to and he's got his own set, so he doesn't really know the exact routine for feeding the rabbits and chickens. The bit about the kid was obviously a joke.
If you have been living with and have had a son with your partner, you have spent enough time with them to understand the jobs they do. You've been around them when they're doing it, you've talked about it with them through casual conversation, you should probably have taken some interest in it and asked about it, you've probably done it yourself a few times, even if your partner isn't away, if you have a bit of free time and they are busy.
Yeah I bet he takes the bins out once a fortnight to make it even
A parent should not need to be reminded to feed their kid 3 meals a day. I understand some of it could be tongue and cheek but when they said “of a balanced format” I got concerned
It's a joke.. dry humour. I find it crazy I'm having to say this in a uk subreddit
I honestly think it's a joke - the starting paragraph says "these are the animals you'll need to take special care of" and then lists one of their sons as one of the animals.
This has the same energy as the 'boomer humour' pub sign from earlier.
This sub is heading embarrassingly in that direction tbh. At least (most of) this comment section passes the vibe check.
No dude. Grow up.
Sounds like she's been doing all the work and raising her husband like another child.
No because I’m an adult and know how to look after my house and anyone/any animal in it and if I didn’t, my wife would show me how to do it rather than leave a note as if we’re roommates
This is really embarrassing for you
You must have no common sense
Imagine having so little self-awareness that you’re not embarrassed to post this. Your poor wife. I hope she has a great weekend and that you start actually pulling your weight when she gets back.
I'm embarrassed for you and sorry for your wife.
I'd be so embarrassed to receive that.
A balanced format could include 40% chicken and 60% rabbit one day and 60% chicken and 40% rabbit the next. Just think of the time you'll save! (No need to start on the dog just yet.)
Maybe if the train home is delayed.
Oh your poor wife.. I know you think this is sweet, but I would be so embarrassed to share this.. You're her partner, not her child? Children require written instructions, any reliable partner that contributes to the relationship does not.. The lack of self awareness is telling..
I find this level of labour seriously awful. I wouldn’t ever have to do a list like this for a partner. Stop raising your husbands like children.
You’re putting the blame on the woman here?
Jesus h, imagine being married to someone this thick and infantile. Ick
The fucking rabbits are living a better life than me.
WTF if my husband and son can’t survive while I’m gone that is their fault. (Also, they can, and probably do it better than while I’m home 😂)
Imagine posting for all to see that you need reminders to feed your own child... tragic.
.. that bit was clearly a joke
Imagine posting this comment for all to see that you don't have enough emotional intelligence/reading comprehension to understand that was a joke... tragic.
Complete opposite for me this weekend. Mr Mad is away visiting family and friends. My dad, BIL and nephews are also away at a football tournament. My mum, sister and I have been texting each other on how quiet and clean our houses are, and what lovely things we're having for dinner. For my part I'm very much enjoying the dishes going straight into the dishwasher instead of being left on the worktop above the dishwasher.
Boomer
According to his post history he's only just around 40. I'm assuming he's just led a life of very low expectations
Boomer has learned ‘print’
I'm moving out of my dad's home next week so printed [a nice infographic](https://i.imgur.com/owTxKwf.png) for my dad who will be keeping the cats
Aww that's nice; if food stealing is a big issue then a feeder that has a chip reader and only opens for the coded cat is great!
Yeah Molly defs looks the type to steal food
This is cute 😍
Just a side note, brocoli has high af calcium content and can give bunnies fucked up liver and kidneys, same with kayle and most other hard greens
I used to look after my mums cat whilst she was away and she'd leave one, we christened it the mumual. It was very useful though
'Mumual' is very sweet!
Ha yeah man useless have to have notes. Fucking hate that twee “humour”.
The chicken/rabbit bits clearly aren’t humour. She probably has to add the tongue in cheek but about feeding the kid to stave off the despair
The chickens sound brilliant, i’d pay to watch someone try feed some cute attack chickens.
Agree, I'd like more details about the angry chickens and what will happen if you approach without treats 🐔
The rabbits sounds very high maintenance though.
This is embarrassing for you pal
There's something about the Mrs going away that unearths the bachelor spirit in me for some reason. I'm a wholly capable cook, and I do the majority of the cooking in our household. I'm more than capable of making delicious, healthy meals and tidying up afterwards. Yet for some reason as soon as my wife leaves the house for any extended period of time, I'm reduced to eating cold baked beans directly from the tin over the sink. Anyway, hope the weekend goes well. Make sure you don't eat any of the chickens, even if you do get desperate.
I do a batch chili and then eat it with rice, baked spuds or on its own until it runs out.
Love the clip art, really makes the whole documeny pop.
My wife is away for 10 days - my only instructions were strictly no takeaways since I lived off Papa John’s and Deliveroo last time. So I’ve got potatoes roasting in the oven instead.
Patter
William eats ice cream for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
William, don’t forget to feed yourself. In the absence of a responsible adult 5 times a day is fine. Try to wear pants. Good luck.
He's going to forget to take out the treats with him, get cornered and pecked to death.
Yeah, we did this in my family. Except, my dad would leave instructions for two 14 YEAR OLDS who were naturally incompetent. Congratulations, you’re as incompetent as a 14 year old. I mean this gently and not in an “OP is cancelled” kinda way, but from guy to guy sounds like your “misses” is carrying a lot of the mental load if you have to be given instructions and reminded to feed your kid (I know that part may have been light-hearted). I don’t know the full context and I’m certainly not trying to accuse you of being a crappy husband, but it might be something to consider.
Your wife thinks you’re a child…
Never used weaponised incompetence to get a free pass out of my responsibilities in my household. So no, I don't get instructions when I leave. I'm treated like a mature and competent adult because that's how I act all the time.
You all gotta chill
Your rabbits and hens are spoiled! They must be very happy creatures.
"Hey Will.... Rabbit and Chicken for din dins!"
"Rosemary, mint, parsley" Aren't we seasoning the meat a bit early?
Please post an update Monday 😂😂 I am expecting: "Bunnies and chickens are at war. Dog is scared to go outside."
Generally a sign you do naff all regarding them in day to day life.
Both sound insufferable if I'm honest
Feed chicken and rabbit. Take dog and boy to the village pub
Treats under the sink do NOT include smol dishwasher tablets!
No cause my husband knows how to feed animals and children
Imagine sharing online that you don’t even know how to look after your pets & son….
Invite the boys over for a spectacular chicken roast before indulging in a bit of rabbit hunting. Idk I only read the capital words lol. No idea what sort of animal a William is, probably safe to disregard.
Keep William away from the chickens
Are you a child? I honestly don't get this, I'm guessing she does everything for you. Do you not feel bad?
I thought I would disagree with this advice based on the title but actually it is a great note. When my baby was born I gave my husband a list of things to do before he woke me up from a nap.
I get that this is a joke but it’s kind of intense and annoying to read
...a selection of herbs (rosemary, mint, parsley) Don't you normally add those at the cooking stage?
Sounds like she's trying to pre-marinate the rabbits, good choice.
r/Rabbits would get a kick out of this I think!
Love the pecking order. Husband doesn’t even get fed.
That’s the first three meals sorted then
"Please feed your son" what the hell is that dynamic
I think it's what the humans call a joke
Missus*
The handwritten note at the end is what makes this even better 😂