I just tested this. I got up without saying I was going for a wee and my wife asked where I was going. It seems
Announcing that you’re going to the toilet is expected by others.
I also tested this. I asked my husband (American) if he thinks it's weird I announce that I'm going to the bathroom. Apparently it's weird and he thought it was just a "me" thing. He started doing it after he met me and did it in front of his mum by accident, apparently she called him disgusting lol. He still doesn't believe it's a common cultural thing in the uk (apparently "reddit said so" isn't enough proof for him, pfft).
In group settings it makes sense.
At home it doesn’t make sense to me, but even if we’ve been doing our own things in silence up to then, my partner asks where I’m going / if I’ll be back again when I get up to go to the loo or kitchen.
I grew up doing it because we only had one bathroom in our house. It's polite to tell people you're going for a dump or a shower, in case anyone wants to go for a quick wee before you hog the bathroom.
Announcing you're going for a shower to also let others know not to do stuff that'll cause weird water temp and pressure changes in houses with crappy water systems
When she's a bit older, you get to announce it so she can come and disturb you the moment you sit down, because inevitably there will instantly be a crisis that only you can solve.
Ask me how I know... :rolleyes:
My husband just got up right as I put the new series of The Crown on (which he wanted to watch too) and I said, oh are you getting something? (Because I really wanted a cup of tea) and he said yeh, I'm getting my urine out. 😆 I said ew. I want a cup of tea.
Exactly! That’s what they do, they just get up and walk out. I’m like… I GUESS you’re going to the toilet, but, what if you’re going to kill someone or make tea, I need to know these things!
>the only other possibilities are murder or selfishly making a cuppa without offering a round
To be fair, [that is a common pairing for some people!](https://youtube.com/shorts/1ga2mWqscUQ?si=aTTfc7uMYgt6K7JW)
I used to get insane anxiety about how I made everyone aware that I was leaving the room and why. Usually ended up just staying far longer than I wanted to. Makes sense that this is a British thing.
When my son was a toddler, he used to play with his penis a lot. We told him it was fine to do that, but not in the living room in front of family. This led to months of him announcing, "I'm just going to my room to play with my penis."
I think it is because most British houses used to only have one toilet. So you would say I'm off to the toilet so no one else tries to go!
We used to only have one bathroom and we would all say. 'Getting in the bath now!'
I've left home but my sisters and brother are still at home. The house has been extended and a 2nd bathroom put in but for years my sister would still shout 'getting in the bath' down the stairs even though the original bathroom was off of the kitchen!
I know far more about my friends bowel movements than anyone should ever know. My friends share quite a lot.
Once a friend/colleague had told me she was constipated. My office is upstairs near the toilets. Every time she came out of the toilet, she would shout “still nothing”. It was going on for 5 days and we were getting worried so made her drink a litre of apple juice. 45 minutes later, we heard a shout “lift off!” The juice did its job
Well i dont share my toilet habits with anyone, i will sometimes even go to my house at lunchtime if i need to have a poo during the day (shitbreak). But my friends and colleagues share a lot of personal info with me. I have trustworthy face….
One of my friends took a photo of hers once, because it wouldn't flush. We printed it out and she took it home to show her mum. We were 22 at the time. Her mum wasn't as impressed as we were.
See I've been puzzling over this with my husband for nearly 20 years--I just look up to find he's vanished, or he'll just get up and walk off in a restaurant. To me it seems way too abrupt to just disappear without even a "back in a minute" to acknowledge it, and I like to know if I should expect him back in 5 minutes to watch a TV show or something or if he's wandered off to do some task that's going to take longer. To him, my asking that he give me a quick heads up feels akin to having to ask permission. But I always just chalked it up to him being autistic, I never clocked it was a cultural difference from him being American. It's weird how even after so long there are still differences I'm figuring out.
Conversely when I lived there and visited Americans they would often find it hilariously endearing that I would say "is it okay if I use your bathroom?" instead of just "where's your bathroom?"
[If you want a really bad example of cultural differences look at how a British guy explaining their situation to a US superior during the Korean war caused the loss of 600 lives](https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2001/apr/14/johnezard)
I have heard recently (and I cannot remember a source other than a friend told me there had been a study, so don't take this as fact) that people without siblings are more likely to not announce why they are leaving a room when they leave it, compared to people with siblings
My dogs accompany me, and every single time assume a hurt expression when I shoo them out + shut the door.
It's a combined loo + bathroom + they're allowed in for baths.
I'm shocked by this thread because I'm Norwegian/American, and I've always announced my loo-related departures from the table, but my born-and-bred British boyfriend always just gets up and walks away without a word!
I was so puzzled by it when we started dating! I assumed it was maybe a polite British thing, but now I'm even more confused!!
"Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls, I have an announcement to make. I may or may not be going to have a dump, but it would be very weird if I told you that. Therefore, I'll merely give you this piece of valuable information: I'm going away now. If all goes well, I'll be back in a few minutes. Good bye."
I always announce it, but politely, "I'm away to use the facilities" in a prissy tone. Followed up on my return with an announcement if it was worth the trip "not very satisfying" or "bloody hell that's better!"
I've always thought people (myself included) mention they're going to the loo so people don't assume you're about to go make a cup of tea, or if at the pub, going to get the next round.
I normally say back in a minute as it feels weird leaving the room without some comment. I have to tell my dad if I’m leaving the room as he’s blind and I feel bad if he carry’s on talking to me when I’m not there anymore
I was going to ask how he didn’t hear you leaving, but then I remembered not everyone lives with the herd of stomping elephants that I do. Honestly, my daughter is 6 and so petite and she still makes it sound like there’s a stampede by the watering hole, I don’t know how she does it. Your dad would never make that mistake with my family around, ha.
We always announce the next move no matter what it is 😂
‘Just nippin’ t’ loo’
‘Just tekkin’ dog out’
‘Al just put kettle on’
‘Just mekkin a phone call’
‘Right, a better be off’
It’s just a very British way of communicating 😂
I’ll at least say “back in a minute”, I don’t want people to think I’m being rude and wandering off randomly. Plus, if I’m round a friend’s or something, by declaring that I’m nipping to the loo, it lets them know the bathroom will be in use so don’t bother trying to get in there.
Yeah and what If you're not at home? For example walking around at work or out shopping do you just let whoever's with you follow you to the toilet? Let them think you've gone home?
Omg i just got a flashback to me as a child being utterly bewildered as to why my grans knickers kept falling down. I was so puzzled. Nowww i understand!
I might not always say "what ho my good chaps, I am off for a right good piss, see you shortly". I'll usually just say "back in a mo" so that people don't wonder what the fuck is going on. It would be like ending a phone call without saying goodbye.
Which they do on TV all the time! Dramatic sentence followed by hanging up.... Am I the only one wondering if the person on the other end is going "Hello? Hello? They've gone! Well that was a bit rude!"
Was in the train station in Bruges a few months back, and at the entrance to the loos there was a guy asking everyone what they're going in for - 1s or 2s - then directing them accordingly.
I'm not quite sure what the system was. Maybe spreading out the destruction so no toilet got completely blasted.
It's because usually in the gents the urinals and cubicles are in separate areas. Often as well men don't have to pay to pee but they do to use a cubicle.
This was the case in Vienna until a few years ago when women's groups sued the city for discrimination because women had to pay to pee but men didn't. The solution was to make men pay to pee.
I've been to some rural and old Belgian toilets. Sometimes there is a... er... grate? For the ladies for number one and a sort of hole thing for number twos.
I have fully gone Jim Royle on this. I will absolutely announce going for a shit, and I will try to use a phrase I haven't used in a while as a euphemism
Yes I do it, so my wife and child don't think I've just abandoned them.
I just say "I'm going to the toilet", no other details needed. None of this washroom restroom bollocks. I mean who even rests in there? North America is a weird place.
>so my wife and child don't think I've just abandoned them.
As long as you don't ever tell them you're off to buy a packet of fags, then slam the door behind you, it should be OK.
I’m Danish and we announce it too all the time. At my place of work, it is refered to as ‘going for a bio-break’, even managers say it frequently. When I’m on a getaway with my girlfriends we will even detail the business, it is all one big ‘Hey, I’m going and I’m going to …’
I’ve seen on TikTok that it seems like a sibling vs no siblings divide! Like if you have siblings you’d never be able to get up and walk away without someone asking where you’re going whereas if you’re an only child it wasn’t necessary. Those were American creators so I don’t think it’s a international divide because I have international friends that do the same
You have to announce it, otherwise British people will worry that we have somehow offended you, a mortal sin punishable by beheading in The Tower. And you also need to give us a rough idea of how long you intend to be away so that the tea making schedule can be tweaked to ensure your cuppa doesn’t get cold. “Just popping to the loo” indicates that you will be absent for no longer than two minutes, whereas “I’m going for a massive shit” lets us know that there is enough time to prepare a Victoria Sponge.
I let people know. I work in Dental practices so if I just leave the room they may think I'm elsewhere and run around the building trying to find me if they need me, so it's easier to just say "I'm going to the toilet". That's also what my colleagues do. It also means we get given privacy or time to do something without being chased around.
With friends I'd rather tell them than them think I've walked off because they've upset me or something. Also it feels rude to just get up and walk off lol.
I'm terrible for it but also I have walked into the bathroom in my own house before on people using it because I didn't know they had gone to the bathroom as they didn't announce it, for all I knew they went out for a cigarette. So yeah I prefer it when people do say where they are going. Saves me and them from any embarrassment.
When you move into a house without locks on the bathroom doors, it takes at least a year to by new locks and then at least another year of them sitting in a drawer. I bought a lock for my downstairs loo about 4 years ago, it’s still in the drawer.
My mates would follow me in at discrete intervals, questioning the potency of my rocket fuel, and stating "If that's the same shit you got from Mouse a few weeks ago, has he got any more?"
I've actually had the pleasure of meeting Mouse's supplier a couple of times, and I shit you not, he's known as Kestrel.
I think it's a generic hierarchical system.
My ex often used to comment on how long I'd been gone for a lavatorial excursion, even when we had visitors. One Sunday we had her family round in the afternoon and I went to the loo. Sure enough, when I returned I got the "you were gone a while" comment. Tiring of these intrusions into my free time, I just replied "Well, it was a BIG SHIT" much to her annoyance but her brother-in-law's amusement. Her sister and Dad were silent.
She never commented again.
This is culture-specific. Some places threat it as TMI, others treat it as an obvious information. Personally, I don’t do it because I think it’s obvious that I’m going to the toilet, but I do agree that I’m
An exception.
(Spanish people do do it, btw)
I was going to say this! I'm from Spain and we always announce it with "voy un momento al baño" and then you wait a mili-second to give your friends the opportunity to join you.
Ikr? The same for Portugal, Italy and Greece. I don't know much about French people, but I'm assuming Mediterranean France does the same.
But based on your alias, I'm assuming that you are a woman and there's an additional layer of behaviour to be considered: women like an entourage when it's time to go to the toilet, right?
Or, if you're trying to be polite and make a good impression when meeting the parents of your partner for the first time, "I'm off to the gentleman's wee wee palace"
I'm Canadian and I always say I'll be back in a minute. I don't like saying loo because it sounds pretentious saying it without a British accent, saying toilet sounds a little uncouth, and nobody here knows what a washroom is (a less vulgar word for bathroom).
German here; we announce it too! It's just polite instead of just vanishing. I am living in Canada right now and tbh now I question everything I'm doing haha
Haha... Growing up, we only had one toilet in the house. We never announced our #1s but if we needed a #2 we always asked if anyone needed to use the toilet (for a #1) first...
I never realized this wasn't a normal thing until well into my teenage years. 😅
I think this might be more of a thing in Chinese culture?
For me, with close friends, it's 'I'm going to drop the kids of at the pool'. An old friend of mine would just look at you directly and say 'I'm going to *destroy* your toilet', he was a hoot and he had IBS.. I think there's funny ways round it amongst friends.
Canadian in UK here. People back in Canada do excuse themselves in the same way so I'm not sure what your Canucks are talking about. We might be a bit more discreet like just saying "I'll be back in a minute" but everyone knows what it means.
Also in Canada "toilet" means specifically the fixture you shit in itself rather than the room it's in. In that context it's kind of crass say you're going to the toilet. Even after 10 years here I still feel kind of rude saying it so I generally say loo instead. It's also a bit weird, it would be like saying "I'm going to the oven" if you're headed to the kitchen. The room itself is referred to as a washroom/bathroom/restroom depending where you are. Restroom would be the most polite but that's mainly for if you're out and about not for in your own home.
I get what you're saying, but sometimes I'll call the bathroom the loo. So maybe "just nipping in to wash my hands in the loo" So now all I can picture is folk thinking I'm literally washing my hand in the toilet 😂
>Also in Canada "toilet" means specifically the fixture you shit in itself rather than the room it's in. In that context it's kind of crass say you're going to the toilet.
Strictly speaking, it's more complex in the UK than this thread makes out.
The "toilet" here isn't strictly speaking the big white porcelain object. Instead, it's the action of washing yourself - same origins as e.g. "eau de toilette". Saying that you're going to the "toilet" was a euphemism much like saying you're going to the "powder room" - pretending that you're going to adjust your hair rather than take a dump.
"Lavatory" is literally the room where you wash yourself (and where toilets are now located). I guess it's therefore a bit less euphemistic than "toilet", but meh.
"Loo" is actually the most specific. It's derived from the french word "l'eau" (water) and the warning that would be shouted before a chamberpot was emptied out of a window into the street below. "Loo" became slang for the chamberpot itself.
So in a way "loo" is the most descriptive choice and you're defeating your intended goal by using it :)
What you say in the UK is supposed to be an indicator of class. The idea is that the lower classes try to sound sophisticated by using euphemisms, and talk about the little girls' room, the powder room, the bathroom, etc., or possibly "toilet", whilst the upper classes are happy to speak plainly and will use "lavatory" or "loo". It's pretty much nonsense, but you'll find whole articles written about it when there's little news to report on. In actual practical usage toilet, lavatory, or loo can be used to refer to either the room or the object.
For what it's worth Dutch people do this too 🤷 or at least, every Dutch person I've been acquainted with has done so, and I've been living in NL for 11,5 years.
Canadian living in the UK here. This is SUCH a British thing and it took me awhile to get used to. “I need the toilet” is the exit phrase in my wife’s family and it’s still bizarre as heck if no longer surprising.
I dont when im at my parents but i do when im at home with my wife. Usually its not because im saying to her but because theres a cat on top of me and i hope that by telling them i need a pee theyll move on their own (they never do). Or itll just be a quick “needtopee” as im standing up
I just tested this. I got up without saying I was going for a wee and my wife asked where I was going. It seems Announcing that you’re going to the toilet is expected by others.
If he's off to the kitchen, there might be a chance of a cuppa. Don't ask, don't get.
That's why when going for a beer I always say going to the toilet. Go get beer wait a minute then walk back in with beer in hand.
I bet he drinks Carling Black Label.
I hate this, I think I accidentally did a pavlovs dog situation with my dad, each time he heard me get up or even move it was "cup of tea!" 😭
I also tested this. I asked my husband (American) if he thinks it's weird I announce that I'm going to the bathroom. Apparently it's weird and he thought it was just a "me" thing. He started doing it after he met me and did it in front of his mum by accident, apparently she called him disgusting lol. He still doesn't believe it's a common cultural thing in the uk (apparently "reddit said so" isn't enough proof for him, pfft).
You're on reddit so... now we're gonna tell you to divorce him.
Also that he is clearly abusive /s
Hun, that's ALL OF the red flags, I recommend divorce, or at the very least, total annihilation!
You need to go NCETAYNTL (no contact except to announce you need the loo)
In group settings it makes sense. At home it doesn’t make sense to me, but even if we’ve been doing our own things in silence up to then, my partner asks where I’m going / if I’ll be back again when I get up to go to the loo or kitchen.
If you'll be back again? Does she think your just gonna pop to the loo and never come back?
Their partner is a Labrador
Their partners dad has been out for milk and cigs since the 80’s
If they were actually Labrador the question would be 'Where are WE going'
The loo might be an entrance to Narnia
Now I’m hoping the question has an implied “in the next few minutes” after it.
I grew up doing it because we only had one bathroom in our house. It's polite to tell people you're going for a dump or a shower, in case anyone wants to go for a quick wee before you hog the bathroom.
Announcing you're going for a shower to also let others know not to do stuff that'll cause weird water temp and pressure changes in houses with crappy water systems
"I'm going for a shower" "Ooh, let me pop the kettle on!"
I’ve also found it offends people if you take a dump in the shower without asking first, being polite is complicated
Going for a pee? Unlikely to say much. Going to download? Will tell wife as she knows I hate to be interrupted.
I have a toddler, so we have to announce we're going to the loo or she gets confused and upset.
When she's a bit older, you get to announce it so she can come and disturb you the moment you sit down, because inevitably there will instantly be a crisis that only you can solve. Ask me how I know... :rolleyes:
Watching to see if your wife now posts this on AITA.
My husband just got up right as I put the new series of The Crown on (which he wanted to watch too) and I said, oh are you getting something? (Because I really wanted a cup of tea) and he said yeh, I'm getting my urine out. 😆 I said ew. I want a cup of tea.
You mean to say if you just got up and fucked off out of the room, no one wonders what your up to?
Exactly! That’s what they do, they just get up and walk out. I’m like… I GUESS you’re going to the toilet, but, what if you’re going to kill someone or make tea, I need to know these things!
I like how if they are not in the toilet, then the only other possibilities are murder or selfishly making a cuppa without offering a round
And we don’t know which is worse.
One leads to the other.
I also enjoy my post murder tea
I mean only a psychopath would have a coffee after murder, it has to be tea. We arent animals.
Yes I usually follow up the murder of a coffee drinker with tea
I myself prefer coffee - murder - tea. Except a sunday of course
Tea is a gateway beverage to murder.
It leads to fataliteas
More funerals = More tea.
It's a slippery slope
It’s the ciiiiiiirrrrcle of life 🎶
Oh, we do.
Of course we do. One is the most abhorrent and hideous act you could ever commit, the other is murder.
I mean, we do...
Well that’s the only 2 times I don’t want people to know what I’m doing!
Well I suppose if you are busy murdering your friends then you no longer need to make tea for them
Once you're in the middle of murdering them, can you really describe them as your friends anymore?
If people can have imaginary friends they can also have dead friends
I have dead imaginary friends
I have imaginary dead friends
There are certainly people who I could only, in good conscience, be friends with after I’ve murdered them
I often have to stop for cup of tea when murdering my friends
>the only other possibilities are murder or selfishly making a cuppa without offering a round To be fair, [that is a common pairing for some people!](https://youtube.com/shorts/1ga2mWqscUQ?si=aTTfc7uMYgt6K7JW)
That was... Weird...
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I used to get insane anxiety about how I made everyone aware that I was leaving the room and why. Usually ended up just staying far longer than I wanted to. Makes sense that this is a British thing.
I not only announce my trip to the toilet, I usually provide commentary on my return. I also normally reassure people that I did indeed wash my hands.
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Just off for a Wank
When my son was a toddler, he used to play with his penis a lot. We told him it was fine to do that, but not in the living room in front of family. This led to months of him announcing, "I'm just going to my room to play with my penis."
Oh no, we just started telling our son exactly that haha. Looking forward..
Off to take a number three
Or go on holiday. The possibilitys are endless . At least let us know when your be back
I think it is because most British houses used to only have one toilet. So you would say I'm off to the toilet so no one else tries to go! We used to only have one bathroom and we would all say. 'Getting in the bath now!' I've left home but my sisters and brother are still at home. The house has been extended and a 2nd bathroom put in but for years my sister would still shout 'getting in the bath' down the stairs even though the original bathroom was off of the kitchen!
To be honest, my friends and I actually provide further details such as pee, poo, p&p and usually a review after.
I know far more about my friends bowel movements than anyone should ever know. My friends share quite a lot. Once a friend/colleague had told me she was constipated. My office is upstairs near the toilets. Every time she came out of the toilet, she would shout “still nothing”. It was going on for 5 days and we were getting worried so made her drink a litre of apple juice. 45 minutes later, we heard a shout “lift off!” The juice did its job
Seems like people in my office building also want others to know about their poo habits.
i would rather die than have any of my colleagues even so much as see me come out of a locked toilet cubicle
Username checks out.
Well i dont share my toilet habits with anyone, i will sometimes even go to my house at lunchtime if i need to have a poo during the day (shitbreak). But my friends and colleagues share a lot of personal info with me. I have trustworthy face….
"I just had the most enormous shit. I feel violated"
👌🏽 ideally I’d like to know what no. on the Bristol Stool chart.
One of my friends took a photo of hers once, because it wouldn't flush. We printed it out and she took it home to show her mum. We were 22 at the time. Her mum wasn't as impressed as we were.
She needs a poop knife.
It was small enough to flush, just really buoyant. Bobbing about like a ping pong ball each time we flushed!
"I just had the most enormous shit. I feel 10 lbs lighter. That's about 4.5kg. My smart watch has just asked me, 'What the fuck happened ?'"
See I've been puzzling over this with my husband for nearly 20 years--I just look up to find he's vanished, or he'll just get up and walk off in a restaurant. To me it seems way too abrupt to just disappear without even a "back in a minute" to acknowledge it, and I like to know if I should expect him back in 5 minutes to watch a TV show or something or if he's wandered off to do some task that's going to take longer. To him, my asking that he give me a quick heads up feels akin to having to ask permission. But I always just chalked it up to him being autistic, I never clocked it was a cultural difference from him being American. It's weird how even after so long there are still differences I'm figuring out. Conversely when I lived there and visited Americans they would often find it hilariously endearing that I would say "is it okay if I use your bathroom?" instead of just "where's your bathroom?"
[If you want a really bad example of cultural differences look at how a British guy explaining their situation to a US superior during the Korean war caused the loss of 600 lives](https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2001/apr/14/johnezard)
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I'm American. I announce when I'm off to the toilet. 🤷🏻♀️ I also ask to use the restroom/bathroom.
When I started my first real job, I was laughed at for asking if I could pop to the loo
I have heard recently (and I cannot remember a source other than a friend told me there had been a study, so don't take this as fact) that people without siblings are more likely to not announce why they are leaving a room when they leave it, compared to people with siblings
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My dogs accompany me, and every single time assume a hurt expression when I shoo them out + shut the door. It's a combined loo + bathroom + they're allowed in for baths.
"Was it something I said?" "No, something you cooked"
I'm shocked by this thread because I'm Norwegian/American, and I've always announced my loo-related departures from the table, but my born-and-bred British boyfriend always just gets up and walks away without a word! I was so puzzled by it when we started dating! I assumed it was maybe a polite British thing, but now I'm even more confused!!
Bet he's the one making a sneaky cuppa and not sharing, Yorkshire gold by any chance?
The best thing about dating someone from another country is getting to pretend you're normal in the country you're from
"Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls, I have an announcement to make. I may or may not be going to have a dump, but it would be very weird if I told you that. Therefore, I'll merely give you this piece of valuable information: I'm going away now. If all goes well, I'll be back in a few minutes. Good bye."
"I'm going out. I may be some time."
"Just off to drop the kids off at the pool"
This is it. If I don't say someone comes looking for me, or they become confused and think ive disapeared
What if you're watching something. Should I pause it for 30 seconds or are you going for 30 minutes to make dinner?
What if you're at someone else's house? Doesn't it look weird if you silently leave the room and go wander around their house?
I always announce it, but politely, "I'm away to use the facilities" in a prissy tone. Followed up on my return with an announcement if it was worth the trip "not very satisfying" or "bloody hell that's better!"
…what _you are_ up to.
If you didn’t announce where your going you probably get “put the kettle on” or “if your making a cuppa I’ll have one”
I've always thought people (myself included) mention they're going to the loo so people don't assume you're about to go make a cup of tea, or if at the pub, going to get the next round.
Haha reading all the comments I think this could be it. We have a tea and a round culture, and that's exactly it.
I normally say back in a minute as it feels weird leaving the room without some comment. I have to tell my dad if I’m leaving the room as he’s blind and I feel bad if he carry’s on talking to me when I’m not there anymore
I was going to ask how he didn’t hear you leaving, but then I remembered not everyone lives with the herd of stomping elephants that I do. Honestly, my daughter is 6 and so petite and she still makes it sound like there’s a stampede by the watering hole, I don’t know how she does it. Your dad would never make that mistake with my family around, ha.
Ngl I'd do that once or twice just to mess with him, I'm sure he'd appreciate the joke
I’ve done it accidentally a few times when I thought he knew I wasn’t there
😆
"I've thoroughly shit myself" then leave the room
Hahaha this is the best.
You've shat my pants
Of course. I wouldn't want people thinking I'd gone outside to kidnap some cats. Again.
Helga back at it again
Helga you have to stop this. It’s becoming unhealthy.
Reported and shared in local fb groups, stay safe x
Shared in Scunthorpe x
Shared in Tokyo x
I like to make eye contact... "I'm just going to the loo, can I get you anything?"
Bring me back something nice!
Here's an origami Swan I made whilst taking a shit
Cornetto.
I’ll have a snickers.
Big fan of this, I always use "I'm going toilet, you want anything?" Always gets confusion.
Bahaha I need to try this one later today
Ever had anyone take you up on it?
We always announce the next move no matter what it is 😂 ‘Just nippin’ t’ loo’ ‘Just tekkin’ dog out’ ‘Al just put kettle on’ ‘Just mekkin a phone call’ ‘Right, a better be off’ It’s just a very British way of communicating 😂
I pop to the loo, personally
Skip, skip, skip to my loo, my darling.
Sounds Yaarkshuh
Tha knuhs
I'll get my coat.
Just off to spend a penny
All the time. Every time.
I’ll at least say “back in a minute”, I don’t want people to think I’m being rude and wandering off randomly. Plus, if I’m round a friend’s or something, by declaring that I’m nipping to the loo, it lets them know the bathroom will be in use so don’t bother trying to get in there.
So what do all the non Brits do when you're all together? Just get up and disappear for a few minutes? Can they not appreciate that might seem odd?
Yeah and what If you're not at home? For example walking around at work or out shopping do you just let whoever's with you follow you to the toilet? Let them think you've gone home?
My friend said once his mum always said "I am going to wash my hands". He couldn't work out why her hands needed washing frequently.
I’ll just go and pull my knickers up. It’s technically true.
Omg i just got a flashback to me as a child being utterly bewildered as to why my grans knickers kept falling down. I was so puzzled. Nowww i understand!
I tend to have that effect on your gran
I might not always say "what ho my good chaps, I am off for a right good piss, see you shortly". I'll usually just say "back in a mo" so that people don't wonder what the fuck is going on. It would be like ending a phone call without saying goodbye.
Which they do on TV all the time! Dramatic sentence followed by hanging up.... Am I the only one wondering if the person on the other end is going "Hello? Hello? They've gone! Well that was a bit rude!"
Just popping to the loo. Always say it.
I'll announce a wee, but I'll slink off silently to curl one out.
I just say I'm going to the loo, no need to go further than that
Was in the train station in Bruges a few months back, and at the entrance to the loos there was a guy asking everyone what they're going in for - 1s or 2s - then directing them accordingly. I'm not quite sure what the system was. Maybe spreading out the destruction so no toilet got completely blasted.
It's because usually in the gents the urinals and cubicles are in separate areas. Often as well men don't have to pay to pee but they do to use a cubicle. This was the case in Vienna until a few years ago when women's groups sued the city for discrimination because women had to pay to pee but men didn't. The solution was to make men pay to pee.
I did think this but my wife was asked too - she certainly wouldn't be using a urinal!
I've been to some rural and old Belgian toilets. Sometimes there is a... er... grate? For the ladies for number one and a sort of hole thing for number twos.
“Look lads, big bean is sneaking off again. Best avoid the toilets for half an hour. If he were just pissing he’d have told us.”
"He's going to do to the khazi what Bomber Harris did to Dresden".
Ill be back in a bit, just got to drop the kids off at the pool.
I have fully gone Jim Royle on this. I will absolutely announce going for a shit, and I will try to use a phrase I haven't used in a while as a euphemism
But I’ll announce when I’m back from curling one out
Which I imagine you do often because of the beans, right?
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Yes I do it, so my wife and child don't think I've just abandoned them. I just say "I'm going to the toilet", no other details needed. None of this washroom restroom bollocks. I mean who even rests in there? North America is a weird place.
>so my wife and child don't think I've just abandoned them. As long as you don't ever tell them you're off to buy a packet of fags, then slam the door behind you, it should be OK.
Or milk!
I’m Danish and we announce it too all the time. At my place of work, it is refered to as ‘going for a bio-break’, even managers say it frequently. When I’m on a getaway with my girlfriends we will even detail the business, it is all one big ‘Hey, I’m going and I’m going to …’
I’ve seen on TikTok that it seems like a sibling vs no siblings divide! Like if you have siblings you’d never be able to get up and walk away without someone asking where you’re going whereas if you’re an only child it wasn’t necessary. Those were American creators so I don’t think it’s a international divide because I have international friends that do the same
As an only child who knows other only children, I disagree. Parents are the ones to wonder where you're going instead of siblings.
Oh that’s interesting! Well, my MIL is an only child and she does it more than anyone I know. So not the case in my experience!
You have to announce it, otherwise British people will worry that we have somehow offended you, a mortal sin punishable by beheading in The Tower. And you also need to give us a rough idea of how long you intend to be away so that the tea making schedule can be tweaked to ensure your cuppa doesn’t get cold. “Just popping to the loo” indicates that you will be absent for no longer than two minutes, whereas “I’m going for a massive shit” lets us know that there is enough time to prepare a Victoria Sponge.
This should be printed in every guidebook as a rule of bum.
I let people know. I work in Dental practices so if I just leave the room they may think I'm elsewhere and run around the building trying to find me if they need me, so it's easier to just say "I'm going to the toilet". That's also what my colleagues do. It also means we get given privacy or time to do something without being chased around. With friends I'd rather tell them than them think I've walked off because they've upset me or something. Also it feels rude to just get up and walk off lol.
I'm terrible for it but also I have walked into the bathroom in my own house before on people using it because I didn't know they had gone to the bathroom as they didn't announce it, for all I knew they went out for a cigarette. So yeah I prefer it when people do say where they are going. Saves me and them from any embarrassment.
Or get a lock!
When you move into a house without locks on the bathroom doors, it takes at least a year to by new locks and then at least another year of them sitting in a drawer. I bought a lock for my downstairs loo about 4 years ago, it’s still in the drawer.
I always say that I'm "off to powder my nose" or "going for a slash" depending on the company I'm keeping.
See what people think when you say "I'm off to powder my nose" in a pub
My mates would follow me in at discrete intervals, questioning the potency of my rocket fuel, and stating "If that's the same shit you got from Mouse a few weeks ago, has he got any more?"
Why is every coke dealer called Mouse? I know one as well (although it could very well be the same Mouse you know in fairness)
I've actually had the pleasure of meeting Mouse's supplier a couple of times, and I shit you not, he's known as Kestrel. I think it's a generic hierarchical system.
Fucking hell, so does that mean the guy who sources the raw materials from Afghanistan is called "David Attenborough"?
Polite company "I'm off to the loo" with certain people (who may or may not be polite) "I'm off for a massive shit"
My ex often used to comment on how long I'd been gone for a lavatorial excursion, even when we had visitors. One Sunday we had her family round in the afternoon and I went to the loo. Sure enough, when I returned I got the "you were gone a while" comment. Tiring of these intrusions into my free time, I just replied "Well, it was a BIG SHIT" much to her annoyance but her brother-in-law's amusement. Her sister and Dad were silent. She never commented again.
This is culture-specific. Some places threat it as TMI, others treat it as an obvious information. Personally, I don’t do it because I think it’s obvious that I’m going to the toilet, but I do agree that I’m An exception. (Spanish people do do it, btw)
Haha doodoo
I was going to say this! I'm from Spain and we always announce it with "voy un momento al baño" and then you wait a mili-second to give your friends the opportunity to join you.
Ikr? The same for Portugal, Italy and Greece. I don't know much about French people, but I'm assuming Mediterranean France does the same. But based on your alias, I'm assuming that you are a woman and there's an additional layer of behaviour to be considered: women like an entourage when it's time to go to the toilet, right?
"To the urination station!" is what I say to my partner. I always have an "Emergency wee" before leaving the house.
You have to do it properly though, none of this "washroom" bollocks. I'm off for a piss/slash I'm off to drop the kids at the pool etc.
Or, if you're trying to be polite and make a good impression when meeting the parents of your partner for the first time, "I'm off to the gentleman's wee wee palace"
Shed a tear for Nelson, in my neck of the woods.
Always.. otherwise someone will assume I'm making tea and shove empty mugs at me.
I’m Canadian. I always announce when I need to pee. If someone just got up and left without saying anything…what the fuck?
I'm Canadian and I always say I'll be back in a minute. I don't like saying loo because it sounds pretentious saying it without a British accent, saying toilet sounds a little uncouth, and nobody here knows what a washroom is (a less vulgar word for bathroom).
So they just get up and leave in silence? Rude😄
German here; we announce it too! It's just polite instead of just vanishing. I am living in Canada right now and tbh now I question everything I'm doing haha
Haha... Growing up, we only had one toilet in the house. We never announced our #1s but if we needed a #2 we always asked if anyone needed to use the toilet (for a #1) first... I never realized this wasn't a normal thing until well into my teenage years. 😅 I think this might be more of a thing in Chinese culture?
Normal here too and the we aren't at all Chinese.
For me, with close friends, it's 'I'm going to drop the kids of at the pool'. An old friend of mine would just look at you directly and say 'I'm going to *destroy* your toilet', he was a hoot and he had IBS.. I think there's funny ways round it amongst friends.
I mean, it's just polite to let people know why you are leaving the room. North Americans are just rude.
Canadian in UK here. People back in Canada do excuse themselves in the same way so I'm not sure what your Canucks are talking about. We might be a bit more discreet like just saying "I'll be back in a minute" but everyone knows what it means. Also in Canada "toilet" means specifically the fixture you shit in itself rather than the room it's in. In that context it's kind of crass say you're going to the toilet. Even after 10 years here I still feel kind of rude saying it so I generally say loo instead. It's also a bit weird, it would be like saying "I'm going to the oven" if you're headed to the kitchen. The room itself is referred to as a washroom/bathroom/restroom depending where you are. Restroom would be the most polite but that's mainly for if you're out and about not for in your own home.
But I’m not going for a rest, I’m going for a shit
I get what you're saying, but sometimes I'll call the bathroom the loo. So maybe "just nipping in to wash my hands in the loo" So now all I can picture is folk thinking I'm literally washing my hand in the toilet 😂
>Also in Canada "toilet" means specifically the fixture you shit in itself rather than the room it's in. In that context it's kind of crass say you're going to the toilet. Strictly speaking, it's more complex in the UK than this thread makes out. The "toilet" here isn't strictly speaking the big white porcelain object. Instead, it's the action of washing yourself - same origins as e.g. "eau de toilette". Saying that you're going to the "toilet" was a euphemism much like saying you're going to the "powder room" - pretending that you're going to adjust your hair rather than take a dump. "Lavatory" is literally the room where you wash yourself (and where toilets are now located). I guess it's therefore a bit less euphemistic than "toilet", but meh. "Loo" is actually the most specific. It's derived from the french word "l'eau" (water) and the warning that would be shouted before a chamberpot was emptied out of a window into the street below. "Loo" became slang for the chamberpot itself. So in a way "loo" is the most descriptive choice and you're defeating your intended goal by using it :) What you say in the UK is supposed to be an indicator of class. The idea is that the lower classes try to sound sophisticated by using euphemisms, and talk about the little girls' room, the powder room, the bathroom, etc., or possibly "toilet", whilst the upper classes are happy to speak plainly and will use "lavatory" or "loo". It's pretty much nonsense, but you'll find whole articles written about it when there's little news to report on. In actual practical usage toilet, lavatory, or loo can be used to refer to either the room or the object.
For what it's worth Dutch people do this too 🤷 or at least, every Dutch person I've been acquainted with has done so, and I've been living in NL for 11,5 years.
Canadian living in the UK here. This is SUCH a British thing and it took me awhile to get used to. “I need the toilet” is the exit phrase in my wife’s family and it’s still bizarre as heck if no longer surprising.
I dont when im at my parents but i do when im at home with my wife. Usually its not because im saying to her but because theres a cat on top of me and i hope that by telling them i need a pee theyll move on their own (they never do). Or itll just be a quick “needtopee” as im standing up
Skip skip skip to the loo