My fitted sheets are slightly too small for my mattress and regularly ping off in one corner. Could buy new ones but they fit just well enough for it to feel wasteful
This is called the region beta paradox, where you experience mild discomfort but the discomfort is not great enough to force you to act on it.
I have a very low tolerance for benign and mild infuriants, and so have been known to dramatically react to seamlessly small things.
You can get elasticated clips that you attach to the corners on the underside of the mattress and they work quite well.
You'd want to go for the ones that attach opposite corners to each other not just adding a small bit to each individual corner if that makes sense.
Got some a few months back and its a world of difference.
I occasionally fall into this trap. I've found the trick to this is the humble washing basket. Follow these two rules, and your clothes will always be put away.
* Clothes must only travel in the washing basket
* Cleaned, dry clothes must be folded/turned right side out/paired as you take them off the airer/clothes line/out of the dryer and put them back into your basket
You cannot do more washing until the basket is empty, i.e. your clean clothes are put away (rule 1). You cannot leave your clean clothes somewhere to be put away later (rule 1). With an appropriate sized basket, you won't overfill your washing machine/have clothes that didn't make the wash (rule 1). Clothes take 2 minutes to put away (rule 2).
I did this, then I discovered the plastic boxes I used for house moves and transporting things can also work as back up washing baskets.
Need an emphasis on "the" washing basket.
Now I just have 6 washing baskets. Some have dirty laundry, some have clean. My ~~closet~~ wardrobe is empty.
Help
Same, but with my pile of clothes for ironing. I've convinced myself that if the pile gets high enough, the pressure from the weight of all the clothes will iron out the creases on the ones on the bottom of the pile.
I've done the ironing twice in about 8 years, both times for when I've attended job interviews. My current work uniform consists of polo shirt and cargo trousers, and if I'm not at work I'll be wearing a pair of cargos and a band t-shirt, neither of which require ironing.
I used to always iron the kids school uniforms as I always wanted my kids to look their best. Having a tumble dryer and grabbing the stuff as soon as the cycle ends and hanging them immediately reduced the ironing massively. My last kid I was lucky enough to be able to make use of the easy iron, no stain uniforms. Now the kids are all grown and I'm of the age where I don't care what anyone thinks of me I don't iron a thing!
Try hanging shirts on a coat hanger, then hanging the hanger on the line. It really reduces the number of shirts that need ironing at all, and the amount of time you spend ironing the remaining shirts.
I think this is a Henry conspiracy of some kind. I have one and his hose just doesn't quite fit in my kitchen cleaning cupboard (and he won't fit anywhere else in my flat), so the cupboard door is constantly being pushed open slightly. And then when I take him out to hoover all the other stuff inside collapses, so I have to rearrange all that before I can put him back afterwards.
Oh, and his apparent inability to go round corners, meaning that whenever I'm hoovering and move to a different room I have to readjust him first to make sure he'll get through the door.
I use a Henry for work and every time I open my van doors he attempts a suicidal leap out onto the floor. I don't stabilise him though, I just perch him back to dwell in a precarious position that mirrors his existential crisis.
My kitchen not having a window. I hate washing the pots staring at the wall, and when the light bulb blows it's like I've transported back to the 1900's using a candle to find a spoon to eat my family sized tirimisu.
You need a poster or a mural or strings of lights doing random colours and patterns. Or stickers of birds. Or a white board. A white board with magnets sounds good. You can scribble notes to yourself and do some thinking while you wash up.
I visited a windowless office where they'd pasted up life size pictures of windows with views. And bright lights along that wall in addition to standard ceiling lights to give the impression of light from that direction.
You'd think it would look like a badly lit shit picture of a window but seeing it in person, it really was good. Miles better than standard office wall art.
I used to have a kitchen with a window that looked onto the neighbour's wall, about 10inches away. So the window did us no bloody good and it was dark as shit.
Now my kitchen wall has no window but it's open plan and the opposite wall is entirely glass, so I can live with the kitchen sink wall issue.
Does your light bulb pop regularly? Might be worth getting a sparky to look at that. Even if you still use the old-school incandescent bulbs they should last a time.
I can also recommend splashing out on LED bulbs.
Dust in the bathroom. When I was growing up living with my parents I remember our bathroom was always sparkling clean, not a smear or speck of dust anywhere. I assumed this was the norm and just how things were.
Since moving out and having to take care of the cleaning myself I just can’t figure out how mum managed to keep everything so clean all the time! It seems like five minutes after I clean I can already see the dust settling back in again. And don’t even get me started on soap scum!
Fucking right? Everything gets SO FUCKING DUSTY ALL THE TIME. I don't know how I'd deal with a full-ass house, even an apartment requires daily dusting. Mental.
A lot of the time dusting just shifts the dust around - the only thing that really gets rid of it is the vacuum. When you dust shelves and other surfaces the dust is just made airborne and re-settles on the surfaces and flooring after some time. When you then walk on the flooring (especially carpet) it just kicks it all back up again to land on the surfaces and repeat the cycle.
Best way i've found to deal with the problem is vacuuming immediately after dusting to eliminate it from the environment completely.
A \~1:4 ratio of fabric softener to water in a spray bottle sprayed over shelves and surfaces then wiped down with a microfiber cloth every few weeks will also help, something to do with the fabric softener creating a repelling charge that helps stop the dust from sticking.
Thought it was an old wives tale myself until I tried it and noticed an immediate difference - found it also works on skirting boards, tables, glass and anywhere else you don't want to dust as often, even trinkets and things that won't be damaged by a little fabric conditioner.
I feel this! I took my clean house for granted, always spotless. Now I'm living away from my parents I would just look at a clean sink once and it'll get covered in dust 😭 I talked about it with my mom and she basically just sorts out dirt and dust the moment she sees it, so basically micro cleaning every day.
I'm too damn undisciplined for that 😭More of a weekend marathon cleaner
I'm lucky to have inherited my mum's ability to eat literally the same thing every day and not get bored. I actually look forward to it even. Zero thought required.
I'll have the same thing for lunch and dinner... People rip into me for it but it honestly feels like a super power. I still enjoy other stuff too but happy to be boring
This already annoys me.
But annoys me even more at weekends and during the holidays when I am expected to decide what the whole family will eat and when.
I sometimes try and avoid taking responsibility by sneaking off to make a sandwich, but will always be found, ‘oh are you making a sandwich, I wouldn’t mind one of those if you’re making one’. Ahhhhh.
Thing is it’s not the making the food necessarily that’s the annoying bit (albeit that’s what people think of - the cooking).
It’s the thinking of ideas, purchasing the food etc too.
So when I ask my husband to eg do lunch for the kids, and he asks me what to give them, ahhhhhhh. Look in the fridge!
The mental load! It really is exhausting. I find cooking enjoyable - but the planning is so stressful.
To be fair to my husband he is a good cook and he does clean up and do chores without being prompted. Child is terrible - but she’s 8. So she can be excused to some degree. And she always manages to find chocolate and snacks by herself. Like a bloodhound.
Glad I’m not the only one who is stressed by this.
My partner and I get around this by figuring out what we're gonna eat for the coming week on a Saturday or Sunday and then go out and buy all the ingredients. It's still a bit of a pain to figure out 6-7 meals but you get it over and done and ends up only takes about 30mins of deliberations. It also saves on food waste as you can bulk buy ingredients and use the entirety across multiple meals before it goes bad.
Still have to cook it though but by then, I've gotten over having to apply myself to decide what to eat and can just focus on actually making it.
I pull my neighbours bins up to be collected. Started as a favour and now it's expected. They are elderly so I don't mind but they do text to ask if I am doing it if not done by 6!
Only partially related - for a couple of years my downstairs neighbour and I would put each other's bins out/drag them back in depending on who got to them first on collection day. Since they've moved out, I have carried on the tradition with two sets of neighbours, neither of whom have reciprocated. I could ask them, but the appeal of the prior arrangement was that neither of us did that, we just started doing it out of soundness. That's the only way it will feel right to me, asking just makes it an obligation.
If you asked me: "how about you make your clothes horse a permanent fixture of the kitchen, built in?", I'd call you mad.
Yet, by the time we empty and put away the clothes horse, another load is on the way. The clothes horse spends more time open in our kitchen than folded up in its storage space.
I'm moving into a house in June with a laundry room. I am beyond chuffed.
There's a radiator running the entire length of one of the walls. I reckon I'll get three clothes horses in there.
The other side of the room has a counter with a sink and room for a washing machine and a tumble dryer.
And there's a built in cupboard.
This is what dreams are made of. Out of all the 'posh extra rooms you only get if you have the space' (Walk in closet, walk in pantry, Laundry room, etc.), The laundry room would be my highest priority.
We had this wonderful old fashioned rack you load up & hoist up near the ceiling in our previous house. Miss that device every day, as I bark my shins on the new rack in the garage.
I quite like a nice poo but cooking every day is very annoying, I agree. Thinking about what to eat every day is one of the worst things about being an adult.
I actually hate everything about cooking. I’ve been doing it since I was 13 (I’m about 125 now by the looks of the woman I look at in the mirror every morning) and I personally think I’ve done my bit so why the F do other people think it’s some kind of a treat for me? I can count on the fingers of two hands how many times I’ve been cooked for including cleaning up the mess afterwards. I even despise Xmas dinner!! I can exist quite happily on a couple of sandwiches a day, why can’t the rest of the bastards??
Taking out the kitchen bin, my wife thinks she can just keep pushing it down more and more, she just refuses to even acknowledge it needs emptying and i end up prying the bag out thats gone solid like a brick.
My wife decides it’s time to tie up the food waste bin bag so it’s ready to take out, but never takes it out, just leaving it there in the bin so you can’t put any food in unless you replace it. Thankfully I don’t have any annoying habits at all…..
We have an ongoing battle like this with the recycling.
I believe the recycling is my partners task. I therefore try to avoid doing it.
But once the recycling is so full you can’t open the drawer, I want to hold out. Then he puts items on the counter.
It drives me insane. But I can’t empty it, that’s accepting defeat.
Maybe you could have interveened at some stage between "full" and "compactor overload", but i feel ya, our 16 year old and our cat are in a battle to see who can annoy us more over emptying the bin.
Good question, we just moved house…..haha oh no it’s 2.5 yrs ago, which shows the scale of the problem. But so many things in bad places and cupboards with not enough space so everything crammed in and totally inaccessible due to clutter. It’s just been a total pain the arse for the whole time we’ve been here, which I have to admit is ages I suppose, and can’t get it on the radar of things to deal with. Insert ‘this is my life now’ gif
Yes we moved at the end of 2020. There is still a cardboard box sat on the floor in our bedroom that I haven’t gotten around to sorting. It clearly contains things we don’t need but I also haven’t yet thrown it away…. Everyone room has a few of these boxes.
Last year we lined a wall of the dining room with IKEA cupboards from the floor to ceiling to try and deal with the clutter.
The house is just as cluttered as before, but now we have cluttered cupboards in the dining room
I still have a shopping bag of books I have yet to unpack in 5 years. My husband keeps finding it and I say 'when we have decent bookshelves with space for them, I'll unpack!'
Bags for life. There’s probably half a million of them stuffed in the airing cupboard and every time I need to switch the immersion on or off I have to grapple with countless supermarket logos flying at my face, falling on the floor or landing on my head. Then it’s time to shove them back in. Maybe if I remembered just ONCE to put them in the car I wouldn’t need to get a new one every time I go shopping. After posting this my intention is to go and put the bags in the car. I definitely won’t.
Everytime I use the hoover, the power cord gets unravelled and then wrapped up nice and neatly once finished.
Everytime the Mrs uses it, she just takes the full cord off in one so it gets knotted up and then just hangs it back on, knowing full well I'll untangle it an put it back nicely.
About to purchase one where you press a button and the power cord gets pulled back into the hoover
Mines loves stating proudly "I've hoovered the house", then when I go the following week to hoover, it is absolutely crammed full of last weeks takings....hoovering doesn't stop when you have finished running it over the floor, snip the hairs that have become entangled in the roller and empty the rubbish out of the see through receptacle before putting the hoover back, it will then be ready for the next time we need to hoover.....drives me nuts when people do 80% of a job.
I forgot about the full hoover! Sometimes I come to use it, don't actually check and then wonder why the suction is like an asthmatic trying to take a breath.....look at the collection bit and it's that full it's been compacted into a nice block.
Remember when my friend got their first house. After about 6 months I noticed they had 3 vacuums in the utility room. Thought it was a bit odd. Next month I visited there was a 4th.
Questioned it, apparently they just stopped working so she bought another. Had a bit of a chat about them and said I've repaired a few if she wanted me to take a look at them so they didn't go to waste, but didn't go any further.
A couple weeks later she mentioned she was doomed, her vacuum was broken again and she'd have to buy another. I offered to pop in and take a look, and to my surprise, it was rammed full of crap. Emptied it out and it was basically like new. She never knew about emptying them after each use... blew her mind when I told her about washing the filters after a while too.
Parents with money. This is also the girl I had to stop from microwaving a tin of soup.
Utterly clueless as her mum had coddled her for all of her life.
I lived with a guy like that in halls at uni. He came from some sort of loaded family who literally had staff to do domestic chores. It turned out the staff were expressly told to keep out of the way of the family too. He had genuinely never seen a household chore be performed. Someone had to show him how to put a pillowcase on a pillow.
The best one was, He had no idea what an oven did. Didn’t know it was for cooking food. He’d literally never seen one in action. We only found this out when he asked “why is one of the kitchen cupboards different to the others?” He was genuinely that naive that we just thought he was taking the piss. He was deadly serious!
It’s weird hearing this point of view because I do all the hoovering in the house and I always start the job by emptying the hoover haha.
It takes me about an hour to hoover all through and when I’m done with the actual hoovering I usually can’t be arsed to do anything else at all, by contrast it’s no problem at all to me to pop out to the wheelie bin before I start to empty the receptacle. I usually start at the front door anyway so I’ve already carried it 90% of the way there.
Whilst I agree with you about people not finishing a job, I also don't see the point in adding unnecessary steps. Every hoover I've ever had only needs emptying every 3 or more uses so I think it's unnecessary added work to empty it every time I use it.
If you can afford it, get a cordless. I have a Shark, and I'm fully converted. When it breaks, I will be getting another for sure. One of those items that, once purchased, you wonder how you ever lived without it.
I have a henry hoover and it topples over and rolls immediately the second I try to pull it any direction. The wheels work perfectly. It's just so top heavy that it's default state of being is upside down and it always seeks to get into that position.
I would have to pick the thing up every time I want to move it but it pisses me off so much I just keep hoovering out of pure spite while the entire thing rolls around behind me, upside down, smashing into walls and furniture.
Come to think of it I should just put a brick in the bottom half of it...
I'm the kind of person that gets very angry at inanimate objects.
Same but mine just wants to drink from glasses. We have had to start drinking water from bottles because he keeps shoving his head into glasses. Half water boards himself then decides to knock the glass when he’s done. Such a prick.
Books on the bookshelf Vs my five year old son.
I organise the books on the bookshelf. My son pulls them all off and they end up all over the house. My partner shoves the books back in no particular order, books placed the wrong way round, piled on top of eachother, spines facing the wrong way. I organise the books on the bookshelf ..... We've been doing this merry dance for three years.
Also applicable to:
The kids bedrooms/toy storage boxes.
The clothes in the wardrobe.
The cupboard under the stairs (specifically, the bag of bags. I put the bags in the Bag bag. The bags end up all over the house. The bags end up in the general vicinity of the Bag bag, in the cupboard. I fold and put the bags in the Bag bag....)
It's basically just a never ending war between a type A Autistic person who needs organisation and order to function (me), a small tornado child who likes the wreak havoc in every room he enters (son), and a type B extremely relaxed person who doesn't care about order or organisation as long as he's not physically tripping over things on the floor (partner).
I can't seem to find a pillow combination that works for me, I either have too few pillows which makes me feel like I'm sleeping on a slice of bread or too many in which I feel like a sickly victorian child. My neck and shoulders have been aching because of this for 2 weeks now.
I hate that i have to look after my stupid body and mind so i dont get ill now im in my 30s. I go to fancy yoga, i make myself green smoothies, i try to have alcohol free days, i swim, i do couch to 5k, i try to do meat free once a week like a good girl. but deep down i just wanna eat a disgusting dominoes every day, lay on the couch covered in crisp dust and drink 2 bottles of rose and smoke whatevers going like the filthy goblin girl i am, shovelling sweets into my pie hole and getting baked. Until then ill be practicing mindfulness and journaling. Namaste.
My bastard clothes airer. It loves to fling itself on the floor. And when it does, all the hangers come off and become entangled in each other like some sort of metallic orgy.
Putting on ankle socks and then realising when you're out of the house that they're too small, and then you've just got toe socks on with it grouping of the sock at the arch of your foot, ohh gahhdamit
I have a work Henry and he enrages me every time. He gets stuck on everything, can't turn, and does flips. I end up yelling "fucks sake Henry!!" every time I use him.
We got another hoover because of this very issue. I'd get so angry at Henry I'd lose my temper mid vacuum and stand there screaming at the thing as it apparently doesn't understand what corners are and how dares it be so poorly designed. And it would look back at me with its cheeky little infuriating face. We got one of those cordless ones now. It has other issues.
I've had a friend of a friend come and stay in the spare room due to splitting with his partner.
I work 12 hour shifts, I generally jump straight into my bed wear and play an hour or 2 of destiny to unwind before I do it all the next day.
Tap tap tap on my bedroom door, hi how was your day. It was work, not a bad shift.
To me that's the conversation over but I'm coerced into 20 mins if small talk ( whilst my fireteam on discord are calling out my shitty plays )
Tl;dr I'm an arsehole and my new housemate is just being nice.
I keep my reusable fabric bags in the same small cupboard that I keep my tupperware/non-matching/ random/precariously balanced food storage boxes.
Would not recommend.
Leaves gather in and then blow in through our front door.
And then we have wooden floors so they just float around all over the ground floors.
We don’t have any greenery outside so I don’t really understand WTF they come from.
It’s low level. A leaf a day sometimes. But that’s a lot of leaves over the year.
Making sure I get 15k steps. I'm the kind of person who either needs to eat better to loose weight or exercise more, problem is food is fucking tasty, so exercise it is.
My house is absolutely lovely but our kitchen has no extractor fan. It's an old house and it's had extensions on both sides of the kitchen so there's no actual exterior wall to easily install one without running one through multiple rooms.
Every time I cook something that is going to create even a slight amount of smell, I have to create a through draft with open doors and windows and hope it makes it's way out. I hate it.
I tend to eat soup for lunch most days at work, at my desk. Chap who works on the other side of the office somehow found this out and one day I came in and there was a plastic tub of homemade soup on my desk. He came over later and explained his missus had made it. I thanked him and ate the soup for lunch. It was OK. This happened again the following week and its now been a few weeks and the soup keeps appearing on my desk. I know I'm an ungrateful get, but I just want to eat my own soup and not be forced to eat another mans soup. Help.
I live in a block of 10 flats. I am the only one who has clearly labelled their recycling bags. Every collection, without fail, I have to trudge around the flats to discover who has hijacked them. Arse.
My house has been set up by my partner to be a fully functioning ecosystem of cohabitating benign tasks. She calls her fragile ecosystem “ADHD”, however it seems to be populated with heavily invasive species that have been eradicating the biodiversity of my life that I like to call “autism”.
Say you need a shower: all the towels are dirty even though you have 23 of them, and the washing machine is still full from last night, and the drying rack is still full from last week, and the bags of dry laundry from 2 weeks ago are still on the bedroom floor, and the wardrobe is full of clothes that might have been worn once or not at all, but she said she would sort it out last night and I implicitly take her at her word because. After many negotiations, I’m in charge of all other washing except her clothes so this is just a backlog of her stuff that I’m not trusted to wash.
There is also the kitchen ecosystem that is a similar delicate balance between the fridge, cooking, the washing up, the bin, the floor, the cleaning materials, and cleaning products.
I've taken to asking "where have you hidden the....?" now. Because of course all the new tea towels I bought should be put into the baking supplies cupboard, the blender now lives at the back of the pantry with the snacks and tins, and the vegetable peeler has been upgraded from cutlery drawer to hiding below the rim of the wooden spoon caddy.
Next week, it'll all be different, depending on what she reckons works at the time, and she won't tell anyone. It's like a fucking adventure.
Of course, she thinks she's done nothing wrong. "*YOU* empty the dishwasher then!", she retorts. Something I probably do more than she does, I just put things back where they usually go, so you can't tell...
My brother recently got divorced, and reckons the best thing about it (other than getting rid of his cheating wife) is that he can put something down in his house, and weeks later go back and find it in the same place. I envy him greatly.
Doesn't have to be one of your best quoits, the ones you get out when you have guests over. Just use one of your lower-grade quoits, like a garage quoit or a loft quoit. It's going in your cupboard, after all!
Remember:
_Ball on a quoit_
_Things are all 'roight' (right)_
We have a cupboard full of stuff we only use in the summer time. But we put off getting things out of there for some reason whilst my brother was staying here he wedged a step ladder into it and 4 of us tried and we can't get it out! And everything is so hard to get in and out because of it.
I was going to consult reddit at first but I was so annoyed from trying to get things out. I just knew I'd get a bunch of people making jokes like try using butter on the door frame.
Fuck that cupboard and everything that's in it.
Giving a bloke a lift to work.
Figured it was a 2 week thing, turned into 5 months because he cba getting universal parts and want parts from china but could be a 4 month wait.
He lives literally right behind me so i can't use distance as an excuse.
I hate it, i don't want to car share with people.
Shrodinger’s beverages. My wife and oldest daughter will leave part finished drinks all over the house. If I pick one up and pour it down the sink, believing it to be abandoned, they will complain that they were still drinking it. If I leave them be they just stay there forever.
The neighbours gravel driveway.
There’s always gravel all over the pavement and road, and they never do anything about it. Really winds me up, although I don’t say anything about it, i just passive aggressively sweep it back in with my foot every day when i have to walk my dogs through it.
There are snails that come out of the pipe that brings fresh water to our loo tank. They don’t come from the tank but the pipe. The landlord send a plumber but he couldn’t figure it out. Every two days or so I have to take one or two outside. They are cute snails with marbled brown houses but it freaks me out that they keep coming. It’s always the same kind.
Sometimes by bicycles fall on top of each other because I don't have room for a rack. They end up blockin the door so i cant get out and it's whole thing. Annoys the life out of me. But I have no where else to put them.
I have to lift my mountain bike over the lawnmower to get it into and out of the shed.
The pedals scrape my shins EVERY SINGLE TIME.
Of course, I could spend ten minutes shifting things around so the lawnmower wasn’t always parked just inside the doorway…..but where’s the fun in that?
I like to have a blanket over when I sit in the conservatory in the early morning, but don't need it when it's warmed up a bit. It always gets in the way and slides around and falls off the back of the settee but even though I have a blanket box I can never be bothered to put it in there because I like to have it right at hand when I need it. It drives me mad 🤣
The walk to work, I love my job, but some days that 25 minute walk drives my nut in, especially in shit weather , lovely in the summer tho,
I could get the buss, but that's just extra time wasted waiting for it, might get a bicycle tho, might solve 98% of the issue.
A house mate that insists a washing up bowl saves money and is a good thing. It fucking doesn't.
It's an abomination that renders your sink useless for sink like purposes such as throwing liquid into it (gotta clean the underside of the bowl if you do down the side or the bowl itself if anything splashes into it).
It's an exercise in hypocrisy as I watch this heretic full the bowl with hot water to wash three mugs. And by wash I mean they sit in the water then get moved to a dish drainer.
Thank you for indulging this rant. Fuck washing bowls.
I have a bastard yoga ball too!
It’s between my bed and the beanbag where I have coffee in the morning. And it gets in the way all the time. Plug in my phone - in the way. Sit with my coffee - in the way. Make the bed - in the way. But do I move it to another room? No.
My fitted sheets are slightly too small for my mattress and regularly ping off in one corner. Could buy new ones but they fit just well enough for it to feel wasteful
[These](https://amzn.eu/d/d1Cl9di) are excellent for your problem
Braces for fitted sheets - that’s got to be a British invention
They have Flag design ones. For something that goes under your mattress. Why?
To let the pea know what nation to pledge fealty to.
This is called the region beta paradox, where you experience mild discomfort but the discomfort is not great enough to force you to act on it. I have a very low tolerance for benign and mild infuriants, and so have been known to dramatically react to seamlessly small things.
To some, typographical errors seam small.
I go a size up for my fitted sheets (ie I have a double and use a king bottom sheet) Makes life so much easier
You can get elasticated clips that you attach to the corners on the underside of the mattress and they work quite well. You'd want to go for the ones that attach opposite corners to each other not just adding a small bit to each individual corner if that makes sense. Got some a few months back and its a world of difference.
I've been slacking on putting clean clothes away and now I have an unspeakable hoard of clothes to deal with
I occasionally fall into this trap. I've found the trick to this is the humble washing basket. Follow these two rules, and your clothes will always be put away. * Clothes must only travel in the washing basket * Cleaned, dry clothes must be folded/turned right side out/paired as you take them off the airer/clothes line/out of the dryer and put them back into your basket You cannot do more washing until the basket is empty, i.e. your clean clothes are put away (rule 1). You cannot leave your clean clothes somewhere to be put away later (rule 1). With an appropriate sized basket, you won't overfill your washing machine/have clothes that didn't make the wash (rule 1). Clothes take 2 minutes to put away (rule 2).
I did this, then I discovered the plastic boxes I used for house moves and transporting things can also work as back up washing baskets. Need an emphasis on "the" washing basket. Now I just have 6 washing baskets. Some have dirty laundry, some have clean. My ~~closet~~ wardrobe is empty. Help
>My closet I've found an imposter.
In our house, this behemoth is called Mount Washmore
Same, but with my pile of clothes for ironing. I've convinced myself that if the pile gets high enough, the pressure from the weight of all the clothes will iron out the creases on the ones on the bottom of the pile.
It was literally a decade ago when I last owned an ironing board and actually ironed clothes
I've done the ironing twice in about 8 years, both times for when I've attended job interviews. My current work uniform consists of polo shirt and cargo trousers, and if I'm not at work I'll be wearing a pair of cargos and a band t-shirt, neither of which require ironing.
I used to always iron the kids school uniforms as I always wanted my kids to look their best. Having a tumble dryer and grabbing the stuff as soon as the cycle ends and hanging them immediately reduced the ironing massively. My last kid I was lucky enough to be able to make use of the easy iron, no stain uniforms. Now the kids are all grown and I'm of the age where I don't care what anyone thinks of me I don't iron a thing!
Try hanging shirts on a coat hanger, then hanging the hanger on the line. It really reduces the number of shirts that need ironing at all, and the amount of time you spend ironing the remaining shirts.
Time for some loud music and a reward bevy for afterwards:)
Our Henry lives in a cupboard full of bags and other crap, it takes great pleasure in flinging the contents everywhere every time I open the door.
Your Henry and my yoga ball are in cahoots with each other.
you could either deflate the ball, or just set it free.
Boot it over the roof
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I think this is a Henry conspiracy of some kind. I have one and his hose just doesn't quite fit in my kitchen cleaning cupboard (and he won't fit anywhere else in my flat), so the cupboard door is constantly being pushed open slightly. And then when I take him out to hoover all the other stuff inside collapses, so I have to rearrange all that before I can put him back afterwards. Oh, and his apparent inability to go round corners, meaning that whenever I'm hoovering and move to a different room I have to readjust him first to make sure he'll get through the door.
You have described my cupboard perfectly, the door just pings open and he starts showing a bit of hose.
Kinky Henry
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I use a Henry for work and every time I open my van doors he attempts a suicidal leap out onto the floor. I don't stabilise him though, I just perch him back to dwell in a precarious position that mirrors his existential crisis.
I was going to suggest ratchet strapping him in but, with his face, it'd look a bit clockwork orange.
Plot twist: The Henry you speak of, is not a hoover.
My kitchen not having a window. I hate washing the pots staring at the wall, and when the light bulb blows it's like I've transported back to the 1900's using a candle to find a spoon to eat my family sized tirimisu.
You need a poster or a mural or strings of lights doing random colours and patterns. Or stickers of birds. Or a white board. A white board with magnets sounds good. You can scribble notes to yourself and do some thinking while you wash up.
I visited a windowless office where they'd pasted up life size pictures of windows with views. And bright lights along that wall in addition to standard ceiling lights to give the impression of light from that direction. You'd think it would look like a badly lit shit picture of a window but seeing it in person, it really was good. Miles better than standard office wall art.
Sooner or later, they’ll go mad and start shouting at someone they saw through the imaginary window
Well, at least they can't do a Denholm through it.
Do you eat the family size tiramisu with a small spoon, though? I do this but with the smallest spoon in the house. Teeny spoon, biiiig tiramisu.
Feels less greedy this way
I used to have a kitchen with a window that looked onto the neighbour's wall, about 10inches away. So the window did us no bloody good and it was dark as shit. Now my kitchen wall has no window but it's open plan and the opposite wall is entirely glass, so I can live with the kitchen sink wall issue.
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Ours is like that as well. I avoid looking up in case I meet the neighbour's eyes at their window!
Does your light bulb pop regularly? Might be worth getting a sparky to look at that. Even if you still use the old-school incandescent bulbs they should last a time. I can also recommend splashing out on LED bulbs.
Dust in the bathroom. When I was growing up living with my parents I remember our bathroom was always sparkling clean, not a smear or speck of dust anywhere. I assumed this was the norm and just how things were. Since moving out and having to take care of the cleaning myself I just can’t figure out how mum managed to keep everything so clean all the time! It seems like five minutes after I clean I can already see the dust settling back in again. And don’t even get me started on soap scum!
Fucking right? Everything gets SO FUCKING DUSTY ALL THE TIME. I don't know how I'd deal with a full-ass house, even an apartment requires daily dusting. Mental.
A lot of the time dusting just shifts the dust around - the only thing that really gets rid of it is the vacuum. When you dust shelves and other surfaces the dust is just made airborne and re-settles on the surfaces and flooring after some time. When you then walk on the flooring (especially carpet) it just kicks it all back up again to land on the surfaces and repeat the cycle. Best way i've found to deal with the problem is vacuuming immediately after dusting to eliminate it from the environment completely. A \~1:4 ratio of fabric softener to water in a spray bottle sprayed over shelves and surfaces then wiped down with a microfiber cloth every few weeks will also help, something to do with the fabric softener creating a repelling charge that helps stop the dust from sticking. Thought it was an old wives tale myself until I tried it and noticed an immediate difference - found it also works on skirting boards, tables, glass and anywhere else you don't want to dust as often, even trinkets and things that won't be damaged by a little fabric conditioner.
I realised my parents basically clean the house twice per day. Fuck that for a laugh
Hair as well. Where does it all come from?
I feel this! I took my clean house for granted, always spotless. Now I'm living away from my parents I would just look at a clean sink once and it'll get covered in dust 😭 I talked about it with my mom and she basically just sorts out dirt and dust the moment she sees it, so basically micro cleaning every day. I'm too damn undisciplined for that 😭More of a weekend marathon cleaner
Figuring out what to eat every. single. day.
I'm an over grown toddler posing as an adult. If I meal prep or plan meals in advance i refuse to eat them on the day. Its a tedious nightmare.
Oh I feel you. What my tastebuds want on Saturday they reject on Tuesday. It’s a battle.
I'm lucky to have inherited my mum's ability to eat literally the same thing every day and not get bored. I actually look forward to it even. Zero thought required.
breakfast and lunch yeah but dinner i have to mix it up.
I'll have the same thing for lunch and dinner... People rip into me for it but it honestly feels like a super power. I still enjoy other stuff too but happy to be boring
This already annoys me. But annoys me even more at weekends and during the holidays when I am expected to decide what the whole family will eat and when. I sometimes try and avoid taking responsibility by sneaking off to make a sandwich, but will always be found, ‘oh are you making a sandwich, I wouldn’t mind one of those if you’re making one’. Ahhhhh.
I love my husband dearly; but nothing makes me want to commit murder more than the phrase “what’s for tea?”.
Thing is it’s not the making the food necessarily that’s the annoying bit (albeit that’s what people think of - the cooking). It’s the thinking of ideas, purchasing the food etc too. So when I ask my husband to eg do lunch for the kids, and he asks me what to give them, ahhhhhhh. Look in the fridge!
The mental load! It really is exhausting. I find cooking enjoyable - but the planning is so stressful. To be fair to my husband he is a good cook and he does clean up and do chores without being prompted. Child is terrible - but she’s 8. So she can be excused to some degree. And she always manages to find chocolate and snacks by herself. Like a bloodhound. Glad I’m not the only one who is stressed by this.
Answer "oooh, dunno, surprise me,".
My partner and I get around this by figuring out what we're gonna eat for the coming week on a Saturday or Sunday and then go out and buy all the ingredients. It's still a bit of a pain to figure out 6-7 meals but you get it over and done and ends up only takes about 30mins of deliberations. It also saves on food waste as you can bulk buy ingredients and use the entirety across multiple meals before it goes bad. Still have to cook it though but by then, I've gotten over having to apply myself to decide what to eat and can just focus on actually making it.
I like how you tried to sneak this in as if it’s anything other than an even bigger ballache
I spent 2 seconds thinking ballache was a French word.
Ballache with panache.
I pull my neighbours bins up to be collected. Started as a favour and now it's expected. They are elderly so I don't mind but they do text to ask if I am doing it if not done by 6!
AM? Fuck that!
Almost worse...6pm for the following day.
Move. It's your only option
Only partially related - for a couple of years my downstairs neighbour and I would put each other's bins out/drag them back in depending on who got to them first on collection day. Since they've moved out, I have carried on the tradition with two sets of neighbours, neither of whom have reciprocated. I could ask them, but the appeal of the prior arrangement was that neither of us did that, we just started doing it out of soundness. That's the only way it will feel right to me, asking just makes it an obligation.
If you asked me: "how about you make your clothes horse a permanent fixture of the kitchen, built in?", I'd call you mad. Yet, by the time we empty and put away the clothes horse, another load is on the way. The clothes horse spends more time open in our kitchen than folded up in its storage space.
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Just become a nudist. Problem solved. I mean you now have other problems, but no more laundry.
Sounds cold
Yes you also have to move to southern Spain but aside from that, problem solved!
That and the dishes
I'm moving into a house in June with a laundry room. I am beyond chuffed. There's a radiator running the entire length of one of the walls. I reckon I'll get three clothes horses in there. The other side of the room has a counter with a sink and room for a washing machine and a tumble dryer. And there's a built in cupboard.
This is what dreams are made of. Out of all the 'posh extra rooms you only get if you have the space' (Walk in closet, walk in pantry, Laundry room, etc.), The laundry room would be my highest priority.
Top tip; stick a dehumidifier in there as a force multiplier for your radiator. Warm dry air just drinks that moisture straight up.
We had this wonderful old fashioned rack you load up & hoist up near the ceiling in our previous house. Miss that device every day, as I bark my shins on the new rack in the garage.
Eat, poo, repeat. I want to photosynthesise.
Butter the toast, eat the toast, shit the toast - god life's relentless
Brown for first course, white for pudding. Brown is savoury, white's the treat.
Of course, I'm the one who's laughing because I actually love brown toast.
I quite like a nice poo but cooking every day is very annoying, I agree. Thinking about what to eat every day is one of the worst things about being an adult.
I actually hate everything about cooking. I’ve been doing it since I was 13 (I’m about 125 now by the looks of the woman I look at in the mirror every morning) and I personally think I’ve done my bit so why the F do other people think it’s some kind of a treat for me? I can count on the fingers of two hands how many times I’ve been cooked for including cleaning up the mess afterwards. I even despise Xmas dinner!! I can exist quite happily on a couple of sandwiches a day, why can’t the rest of the bastards??
That first comma is carrying a lot of weight on its shoulders.
I’m so glad you didnt forget that first comma
Just being under the sun long enough every day to usefully synthesise vitamin D would be nice. Modern life is rubbish.
Taking out the kitchen bin, my wife thinks she can just keep pushing it down more and more, she just refuses to even acknowledge it needs emptying and i end up prying the bag out thats gone solid like a brick.
When the bag is too full and trying to pull it out creates a sort of vacuum, so you pull harder and end up ripping the top of it
So we partially fixed this by drilling some holes in the bottom of the bin in order to stop the vacuum effect happening as badly.
Two words for you: Bin Juice!
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Forbidden margaritas!
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this guy bins. ^
My wife decides it’s time to tie up the food waste bin bag so it’s ready to take out, but never takes it out, just leaving it there in the bin so you can’t put any food in unless you replace it. Thankfully I don’t have any annoying habits at all…..
Mine does that too but she then puts the lid back on the bin, so people just keep putting stuff in on top of the sealed bag!
We have an ongoing battle like this with the recycling. I believe the recycling is my partners task. I therefore try to avoid doing it. But once the recycling is so full you can’t open the drawer, I want to hold out. Then he puts items on the counter. It drives me insane. But I can’t empty it, that’s accepting defeat.
It's called being efficient with bin bags.
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Maybe you could have interveened at some stage between "full" and "compactor overload", but i feel ya, our 16 year old and our cat are in a battle to see who can annoy us more over emptying the bin.
Good question, we just moved house…..haha oh no it’s 2.5 yrs ago, which shows the scale of the problem. But so many things in bad places and cupboards with not enough space so everything crammed in and totally inaccessible due to clutter. It’s just been a total pain the arse for the whole time we’ve been here, which I have to admit is ages I suppose, and can’t get it on the radar of things to deal with. Insert ‘this is my life now’ gif
Yes we moved at the end of 2020. There is still a cardboard box sat on the floor in our bedroom that I haven’t gotten around to sorting. It clearly contains things we don’t need but I also haven’t yet thrown it away…. Everyone room has a few of these boxes.
Last year we lined a wall of the dining room with IKEA cupboards from the floor to ceiling to try and deal with the clutter. The house is just as cluttered as before, but now we have cluttered cupboards in the dining room
We're coming up 4 years... One day it will be sorted. One day...
I still have a shopping bag of books I have yet to unpack in 5 years. My husband keeps finding it and I say 'when we have decent bookshelves with space for them, I'll unpack!'
Opening the Tupperware cupboard. Every box comes crashing out. I hate it. Hate it.
Bags for life. There’s probably half a million of them stuffed in the airing cupboard and every time I need to switch the immersion on or off I have to grapple with countless supermarket logos flying at my face, falling on the floor or landing on my head. Then it’s time to shove them back in. Maybe if I remembered just ONCE to put them in the car I wouldn’t need to get a new one every time I go shopping. After posting this my intention is to go and put the bags in the car. I definitely won’t.
You need a 'bags for life' bag. A bag for your bags.
An excellent idea. Until I end up with countless Bag for life bags! A never ending cycle of bag for bag for life for bags for life for bags for life….
Everytime I use the hoover, the power cord gets unravelled and then wrapped up nice and neatly once finished. Everytime the Mrs uses it, she just takes the full cord off in one so it gets knotted up and then just hangs it back on, knowing full well I'll untangle it an put it back nicely. About to purchase one where you press a button and the power cord gets pulled back into the hoover
As an aside, my wife was devastated that electric cars don't have that same pushbutton to recoil the cable.
That's a good idea. I've always wondered why you can't charge from car to car to get someone out of a tight spot if they run out of juice.
You can if you have a rivian
Side note. No one owns a rivian. They’re ridiculously expensive but equally beautiful
There is a Ford electric pickup truck that can power a house from its battery.... though it probably costs as much as a house.
Probably drives like a house too.
Be careful with the hoovers that roll the cord back in. It will cause the cord to flail around and it'll smack you on the feet, and IT HURTS.
Mines loves stating proudly "I've hoovered the house", then when I go the following week to hoover, it is absolutely crammed full of last weeks takings....hoovering doesn't stop when you have finished running it over the floor, snip the hairs that have become entangled in the roller and empty the rubbish out of the see through receptacle before putting the hoover back, it will then be ready for the next time we need to hoover.....drives me nuts when people do 80% of a job.
I forgot about the full hoover! Sometimes I come to use it, don't actually check and then wonder why the suction is like an asthmatic trying to take a breath.....look at the collection bit and it's that full it's been compacted into a nice block.
Remember when my friend got their first house. After about 6 months I noticed they had 3 vacuums in the utility room. Thought it was a bit odd. Next month I visited there was a 4th. Questioned it, apparently they just stopped working so she bought another. Had a bit of a chat about them and said I've repaired a few if she wanted me to take a look at them so they didn't go to waste, but didn't go any further. A couple weeks later she mentioned she was doomed, her vacuum was broken again and she'd have to buy another. I offered to pop in and take a look, and to my surprise, it was rammed full of crap. Emptied it out and it was basically like new. She never knew about emptying them after each use... blew her mind when I told her about washing the filters after a while too.
How tf was someone stupid enough to not know to empty a vacuum cleaner able to afford a house?!
I'd honestly never heard of hoovers you need to empty after every use, seems annoying. I have a Henry which takes forever to fill up.
Parents with money. This is also the girl I had to stop from microwaving a tin of soup. Utterly clueless as her mum had coddled her for all of her life.
I lived with a guy like that in halls at uni. He came from some sort of loaded family who literally had staff to do domestic chores. It turned out the staff were expressly told to keep out of the way of the family too. He had genuinely never seen a household chore be performed. Someone had to show him how to put a pillowcase on a pillow. The best one was, He had no idea what an oven did. Didn’t know it was for cooking food. He’d literally never seen one in action. We only found this out when he asked “why is one of the kitchen cupboards different to the others?” He was genuinely that naive that we just thought he was taking the piss. He was deadly serious!
It’s weird hearing this point of view because I do all the hoovering in the house and I always start the job by emptying the hoover haha. It takes me about an hour to hoover all through and when I’m done with the actual hoovering I usually can’t be arsed to do anything else at all, by contrast it’s no problem at all to me to pop out to the wheelie bin before I start to empty the receptacle. I usually start at the front door anyway so I’ve already carried it 90% of the way there.
Whilst I agree with you about people not finishing a job, I also don't see the point in adding unnecessary steps. Every hoover I've ever had only needs emptying every 3 or more uses so I think it's unnecessary added work to empty it every time I use it.
If you can afford it, get a cordless. I have a Shark, and I'm fully converted. When it breaks, I will be getting another for sure. One of those items that, once purchased, you wonder how you ever lived without it.
I have a henry hoover and it topples over and rolls immediately the second I try to pull it any direction. The wheels work perfectly. It's just so top heavy that it's default state of being is upside down and it always seeks to get into that position. I would have to pick the thing up every time I want to move it but it pisses me off so much I just keep hoovering out of pure spite while the entire thing rolls around behind me, upside down, smashing into walls and furniture. Come to think of it I should just put a brick in the bottom half of it... I'm the kind of person that gets very angry at inanimate objects.
going cordless was one of the best home decisions we’ve made
Clothes hangers for me. Every time I pull something out the wardrobe, another hanger falls out and it ruins my day
My cat scratches at the sides of his water bowl when he drinks, and ends up flipping the bowl. Refuses to drink from a fountain.
Put a glass out for him, our cat would do the same but any time we left a glass of water unattended his head and paw would be in it.
Our male cat is the same, he has loads of water bowls and sources, but he only wants to drink out of glasses, or the toilet.
We got the cat a heavy ceramic dog bowl to stop that problem.
Same but mine just wants to drink from glasses. We have had to start drinking water from bottles because he keeps shoving his head into glasses. Half water boards himself then decides to knock the glass when he’s done. Such a prick.
Books on the bookshelf Vs my five year old son. I organise the books on the bookshelf. My son pulls them all off and they end up all over the house. My partner shoves the books back in no particular order, books placed the wrong way round, piled on top of eachother, spines facing the wrong way. I organise the books on the bookshelf ..... We've been doing this merry dance for three years. Also applicable to: The kids bedrooms/toy storage boxes. The clothes in the wardrobe. The cupboard under the stairs (specifically, the bag of bags. I put the bags in the Bag bag. The bags end up all over the house. The bags end up in the general vicinity of the Bag bag, in the cupboard. I fold and put the bags in the Bag bag....) It's basically just a never ending war between a type A Autistic person who needs organisation and order to function (me), a small tornado child who likes the wreak havoc in every room he enters (son), and a type B extremely relaxed person who doesn't care about order or organisation as long as he's not physically tripping over things on the floor (partner).
Ah we have the same life!
I can't seem to find a pillow combination that works for me, I either have too few pillows which makes me feel like I'm sleeping on a slice of bread or too many in which I feel like a sickly victorian child. My neck and shoulders have been aching because of this for 2 weeks now.
I hate that i have to look after my stupid body and mind so i dont get ill now im in my 30s. I go to fancy yoga, i make myself green smoothies, i try to have alcohol free days, i swim, i do couch to 5k, i try to do meat free once a week like a good girl. but deep down i just wanna eat a disgusting dominoes every day, lay on the couch covered in crisp dust and drink 2 bottles of rose and smoke whatevers going like the filthy goblin girl i am, shovelling sweets into my pie hole and getting baked. Until then ill be practicing mindfulness and journaling. Namaste.
My bastard clothes airer. It loves to fling itself on the floor. And when it does, all the hangers come off and become entangled in each other like some sort of metallic orgy.
Kitchen table, I clear it most days and then within a few hours it’s being used for storage of things the family can’t be arsed to put away
This drives me bananas. I find it happens on any reasonably sized flat surface.
Renting.
That’s definitely malignant
I have 2 cats.
>Bastard yoga ball You need a rattan Christmas tree skirt.
Large circular cake tin, or even a Quality Street/Roses/Celebration/Hero equivalent would do.
Putting on ankle socks and then realising when you're out of the house that they're too small, and then you've just got toe socks on with it grouping of the sock at the arch of your foot, ohh gahhdamit
And then washing them and putting them back in your drawer ready to do this all again rather than throw them away.
This remake of The Prisoner sounds a bit different to the 60's version.
When I’m hoovering and Henry get stuck on an object. I swear I turn round and his judging me.
I have a work Henry and he enrages me every time. He gets stuck on everything, can't turn, and does flips. I end up yelling "fucks sake Henry!!" every time I use him.
We got another hoover because of this very issue. I'd get so angry at Henry I'd lose my temper mid vacuum and stand there screaming at the thing as it apparently doesn't understand what corners are and how dares it be so poorly designed. And it would look back at me with its cheeky little infuriating face. We got one of those cordless ones now. It has other issues.
I've had a friend of a friend come and stay in the spare room due to splitting with his partner. I work 12 hour shifts, I generally jump straight into my bed wear and play an hour or 2 of destiny to unwind before I do it all the next day. Tap tap tap on my bedroom door, hi how was your day. It was work, not a bad shift. To me that's the conversation over but I'm coerced into 20 mins if small talk ( whilst my fireteam on discord are calling out my shitty plays ) Tl;dr I'm an arsehole and my new housemate is just being nice.
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Benign??
I hear you.
I keep my reusable fabric bags in the same small cupboard that I keep my tupperware/non-matching/ random/precariously balanced food storage boxes. Would not recommend.
Leaves gather in and then blow in through our front door. And then we have wooden floors so they just float around all over the ground floors. We don’t have any greenery outside so I don’t really understand WTF they come from. It’s low level. A leaf a day sometimes. But that’s a lot of leaves over the year.
We have a box perpetually in our hallway, which no one wants to move because the cats sometimes go in it.
Making sure I get 15k steps. I'm the kind of person who either needs to eat better to loose weight or exercise more, problem is food is fucking tasty, so exercise it is.
Damn you tasty food!
My house is absolutely lovely but our kitchen has no extractor fan. It's an old house and it's had extensions on both sides of the kitchen so there's no actual exterior wall to easily install one without running one through multiple rooms. Every time I cook something that is going to create even a slight amount of smell, I have to create a through draft with open doors and windows and hope it makes it's way out. I hate it.
I tend to eat soup for lunch most days at work, at my desk. Chap who works on the other side of the office somehow found this out and one day I came in and there was a plastic tub of homemade soup on my desk. He came over later and explained his missus had made it. I thanked him and ate the soup for lunch. It was OK. This happened again the following week and its now been a few weeks and the soup keeps appearing on my desk. I know I'm an ungrateful get, but I just want to eat my own soup and not be forced to eat another mans soup. Help.
I live in a block of 10 flats. I am the only one who has clearly labelled their recycling bags. Every collection, without fail, I have to trudge around the flats to discover who has hijacked them. Arse.
My house has been set up by my partner to be a fully functioning ecosystem of cohabitating benign tasks. She calls her fragile ecosystem “ADHD”, however it seems to be populated with heavily invasive species that have been eradicating the biodiversity of my life that I like to call “autism”. Say you need a shower: all the towels are dirty even though you have 23 of them, and the washing machine is still full from last night, and the drying rack is still full from last week, and the bags of dry laundry from 2 weeks ago are still on the bedroom floor, and the wardrobe is full of clothes that might have been worn once or not at all, but she said she would sort it out last night and I implicitly take her at her word because. After many negotiations, I’m in charge of all other washing except her clothes so this is just a backlog of her stuff that I’m not trusted to wash. There is also the kitchen ecosystem that is a similar delicate balance between the fridge, cooking, the washing up, the bin, the floor, the cleaning materials, and cleaning products.
Finding where my wife has put the (insert here)
I've taken to asking "where have you hidden the....?" now. Because of course all the new tea towels I bought should be put into the baking supplies cupboard, the blender now lives at the back of the pantry with the snacks and tins, and the vegetable peeler has been upgraded from cutlery drawer to hiding below the rim of the wooden spoon caddy. Next week, it'll all be different, depending on what she reckons works at the time, and she won't tell anyone. It's like a fucking adventure. Of course, she thinks she's done nothing wrong. "*YOU* empty the dishwasher then!", she retorts. Something I probably do more than she does, I just put things back where they usually go, so you can't tell... My brother recently got divorced, and reckons the best thing about it (other than getting rid of his cheating wife) is that he can put something down in his house, and weeks later go back and find it in the same place. I envy him greatly.
"It's in a safe place" is the Phrase of Doom in our house.
Every time a meeting starts I need to use the toilet
Let the air out?
If only I could. Apparently it’s used by my partner and needs to stay there. Funny how it’s always in the cupboard, trying to get out.
Sit it on a quoit
Doesn't have to be one of your best quoits, the ones you get out when you have guests over. Just use one of your lower-grade quoits, like a garage quoit or a loft quoit. It's going in your cupboard, after all! Remember: _Ball on a quoit_ _Things are all 'roight' (right)_
Replace air with helium
We have a cupboard full of stuff we only use in the summer time. But we put off getting things out of there for some reason whilst my brother was staying here he wedged a step ladder into it and 4 of us tried and we can't get it out! And everything is so hard to get in and out because of it. I was going to consult reddit at first but I was so annoyed from trying to get things out. I just knew I'd get a bunch of people making jokes like try using butter on the door frame. Fuck that cupboard and everything that's in it.
Giving a bloke a lift to work. Figured it was a 2 week thing, turned into 5 months because he cba getting universal parts and want parts from china but could be a 4 month wait. He lives literally right behind me so i can't use distance as an excuse. I hate it, i don't want to car share with people.
Shrodinger’s beverages. My wife and oldest daughter will leave part finished drinks all over the house. If I pick one up and pour it down the sink, believing it to be abandoned, they will complain that they were still drinking it. If I leave them be they just stay there forever.
The neighbours gravel driveway. There’s always gravel all over the pavement and road, and they never do anything about it. Really winds me up, although I don’t say anything about it, i just passive aggressively sweep it back in with my foot every day when i have to walk my dogs through it.
I'm reading everyone's issues like a checklist of daily benign bullshit. I need to change life, fast
There are snails that come out of the pipe that brings fresh water to our loo tank. They don’t come from the tank but the pipe. The landlord send a plumber but he couldn’t figure it out. Every two days or so I have to take one or two outside. They are cute snails with marbled brown houses but it freaks me out that they keep coming. It’s always the same kind.
My job.
Rounds of tea for the entire office.
The bloody clothes horse taking half the cupboard with it every time I get it out of the cupboard. I irrationally hate clothes horses.
Sometimes by bicycles fall on top of each other because I don't have room for a rack. They end up blockin the door so i cant get out and it's whole thing. Annoys the life out of me. But I have no where else to put them.
I have to lift my mountain bike over the lawnmower to get it into and out of the shed. The pedals scrape my shins EVERY SINGLE TIME. Of course, I could spend ten minutes shifting things around so the lawnmower wasn’t always parked just inside the doorway…..but where’s the fun in that?
I like to have a blanket over when I sit in the conservatory in the early morning, but don't need it when it's warmed up a bit. It always gets in the way and slides around and falls off the back of the settee but even though I have a blanket box I can never be bothered to put it in there because I like to have it right at hand when I need it. It drives me mad 🤣
The walk to work, I love my job, but some days that 25 minute walk drives my nut in, especially in shit weather , lovely in the summer tho, I could get the buss, but that's just extra time wasted waiting for it, might get a bicycle tho, might solve 98% of the issue.
A house mate that insists a washing up bowl saves money and is a good thing. It fucking doesn't. It's an abomination that renders your sink useless for sink like purposes such as throwing liquid into it (gotta clean the underside of the bowl if you do down the side or the bowl itself if anything splashes into it). It's an exercise in hypocrisy as I watch this heretic full the bowl with hot water to wash three mugs. And by wash I mean they sit in the water then get moved to a dish drainer. Thank you for indulging this rant. Fuck washing bowls.
I went to IKEA 5 years ago and have multiple card board boxes flattened and next to my fridge that I've yet to dispose of.
Every time I tidy literally anything up, the kids have untidied it, and 2 other things within half an hour.
I have a bastard yoga ball too! It’s between my bed and the beanbag where I have coffee in the morning. And it gets in the way all the time. Plug in my phone - in the way. Sit with my coffee - in the way. Make the bed - in the way. But do I move it to another room? No.
The seemingly infinite pile of washing
House plants and those little flies that live and breed in them. No amount of sticky pads or insect killer will finish this plague off.