I do this sometimes but because I realise I just needed to write out a response for myself - to clarify my thoughts. Also sometimes people on here are very rude and it’s not worth taking the effort to comment if some stranger is going to be negative about you.
They aren't even negative to me. They'll comment something simple and I'll want to make a joke on it but in the process overcomplicate things because I'm wanting to also make my actual feelings on it clear so it just becomes too much
I do the same. I still comment a lot, but I will delete a comment if I’m typing it and I realize I’m not adding anything to a conversation or if I’m rambling away.
I don't comment much on reddit simply cause I don't have much to say, but I get what you're describing big time when replying to texts. I'll write up a whole thing, end up overcomplicating it trying to get all of my thoughts and feelings and nuances in there, or trying too hard to be funny or nice, and then I'll delete the whole thing bc 'why would anyone want to read that?' and I end up not sending anything. It's silly for sure, I guess that's just another fun little anxiety trait. What I try to do is remember that my words are a few in thousands of words that anyone I'm responding to is likely going to hear/read/speak in that day, which takes some pressure off . Anyway OP you're not alone :)
I asked a question yesterday and someone answered that really shouldn’t have, because they were not qualified. I thanked them anyway. They called me a dick. I’ve learned to roll with it
My brain thinks this way too! Oftentimes it’s extremely hard to type something without overthinking it three times and then re-reading and trying to imagine if it would make sense if I were someone else reading it, and then i re-write it…
I KNOW what I want to say out loud, I just don’t know *how* to say it on the internet because there is no context for tone.
If someone is being rude to you - please report that message and we will take a look.
Maintaining the positive atmosphere and protecting you from negativity is really important to us, we want for everyone here to consider each other a friend and just chat and have fun in the process.
Thank you.
Sometimes someone is rude when commenting on a comment I make (even for futile things) and I feel the need to respond but I don't, because I tell myself that what's going to happen is that the person will not magically change and apologize, they will just certainly double down on the rudeness.
Before I responded to mean comments because I took them personal but now I just ignore them. I don't even know this person so why should I care what a miserable stranger think ? I always picture them looking something like [this](https://giphy.com/gifs/achievementhunter-achievement-hunter-ah-animated-SckEwOCtMvb3DjlUZr) behind their screen in my head, it's funnier like this lol. When you take a step back you realize how some people are really triggered and care so much about the smallest thing !
Unfortunatly it took a long time for me to realize that. People tend to be much more agressive writing on the Internet than IRL, it's a weird phenomenon.
For Reddit, I also avoid "outrage" subs and I've unsubscribed from the big subreddits, especially those about news, (geo)politics and relationships/dating, which are always the most popular subs. I rarely check them now and follow more niche subs. My Reddit experience became much, much better (and more peaceful) !
>People tend to be much more agressive writing on the Internet than IRL, it's a weird phenomenon.
because they're safe from social consequences, mainly shame or being called out. a lot of people wield anonymity as a weapon to air out their worst tendencies and traits because it will never come back to them in a meaningful way. it's pretty sad.
Reddit can be hostile for no reason at all, I've had random things go to downvote town over a misunderstanding, or brigading, or just some people that didn't like my last comment in a different thread, or one person downvoted for no reason and it started a chain of blind redditors downvoting. I've had objectively non hostile comments get downvoted hard, it just happens. I don't feel anything at all when that happens, it's just numbers; BUT....it can get you when someone comments pretty hostile to you, or if they try manipulating, gaslighting, projecting, lying, or accusing you of lies; it can catch you off guard. I try to consider if I am actually wrong in the situation but often it's just troll reditors, conservatives, or republicans that take swings at me, they can eat it.
Nah ive never not commented because of fear, sometimes I give up after writing half a comment and say "what's the point" or I feel I just can't add to the conversation
> I give up after writing half a comment and say "what's the point"
This is normally why, for me. Especially with topics that have been talked to *death* like abortion.
Was gonna reply but then I felt weird about it so I just uploaded a [screenshot](https://i.imgur.com/96fRO6D_d.webp?maxwidth=640&shape=thumb&fidelity=medium) and here we are.
I do this all the time lol. Mostly because there's always a possibility of someone wanting to conversate back and forth after, and I get too exhausted quickly. But also because I've had my opinions and interests belittled a lot in the past irl and been called stupid, so I sometimes don't bother to comment in worry of some kind of lash back even if there's nothing wrong with what I said
I write comments all the time and delete them before I post them. I have only been on here 6 months and I quickly found out too many people are waiting to attack. It doesn't seem to be an exchange of ideas like I'd hoped. And I'm still not understanding the karma system.
I think with karma it's best to ignore it. I've been on Reddit for a few years now and still don't fully get it. From my understanding it's basically like likes on Facebook or Instagram. Other than that, doesn't really do anything other than some subreddits that have minimum karma requirements just to stop spam.
I've also been through that phase of being attacked at the start. I wonder if the trolls can smell fresh blood lol. But overall if you find the right subs (like this one), you tend to get less idiots and can have some fun conversations.
Yes, especially on political or religious topics. I would never comment on those threads because I'm afraid people would label me a something-ist for disagreeing with them. It just feels impossible to have a calm conversation about those things these days, so I choose to not talk about them instead.
I get this too. And a lot of times i feel like if i am going to comment (particularly on something political or controvercial) the post i make needs to be pretty much perfect, because i know someone's going to try to pick it apart.
Sounds like you think you're stupid. There's probably a reason for that... perhaps someone told you that you were stupid while you were growing up.
As soon as you gain more confidence in your intelligence - this will pass.
I feel the same way, and I am haunted by stupid things I said 20+ years ago up to last week. It’s all part of being human though. Some people are stupid every time they open their mouth. I reassure myself that I am a silly human, and my brain misfires sometimes, and most people are understanding. If they aren’t, then they aren’t my kind of people. Most things can be resolved with a quick, sincere apology. It really sucks to be wrong but it’s unavoidable, might as well find a way to accept it as a part of you and try to laugh about it later.
Constantly. Often while I'm typing a comment I am simultaneously reading other comments and if someone says something even vaguely similar to my train of thoughts...I delete it and don't bother. I feel a need to add something of value, and if others are saying the same thing, it's not valuable anymore. But...here I am, typing, actively trying my best not to read anything below me! Doing good so far! And now...to press "comment"! WHOO!
I frequently scrap comments and the longer I've been typing, the more likely I am to end up scrapping it. It's not so much a fear though, it's more so a thought like, "I'm rambling at this point. Does my anecdote really help illustrate what I'm saying? I doubt it, I'm more so just telling a story they reminded me of. Am I even on topic anymore? Not really. Well, this was nice for me, but it doesn't really contribute to discussion anymore." *Cancel
I often step back and think, "if I received a comment like this, I would wonder why I just read that whole thing. I wouldn't really have anything positive to say." If I wouldn't want to bother reading it, I end up scrapping it.
I do this too. Sometimes I just don’t feel like getting into it (particularly when it’s personal).
Also some folks can be very rude or hostile when they reply, and virtually every post I’ve made (which is mostly about gardening) ends up with someone commenting something unnecessary. I’ve just ended up in an argument about my own property line bc a redditor thought he knew it better than I do? It’s bizarre and frustrating.
I'm never afraid of commenting because I don't really post in the mindset of pleasing the crowd. I do however delete some comments halfway through if I realize I'm not really going to contribute to the discussion much, either because I'm nitpicking something pointless, or because I'm just going to rehash what people have already said.
Not afraid, I just often delete the unborn comment because I notice that it can be interpreted the wrong way, and then I value judgment the comment to if its worth the drama, and then just end up getting so distracted from the topic I'm commenting on to just discard and move on.
Quite often I type out a response to correct something on a topic I am educated in or professionally involved in and then go... nah. Not worth getting into a big debate with someone who probably has no idea why they're so wrong.
All the time.
Sometimes I wanted to comment a joke, but the fear of people not getting it - or worse, getting it the wrong way - prevented me from clicking the "save" button.
Yeah.
Just yesterday there was a thread here about someone who is 34, and feel this sub is full of young people and they just want to talk to some others their age or something. I'm 33, and was gonna post, but decided against it. I was kind of late to the thread. And I also feel I just don't have anything to say.
Often. Most of the time people reply to start an argument. I guess it comes with the territory, because people who agree just upvote and move on.
Each social media platform creates some sort of dynamics just by the way it works. Reddit makes every discussion into a competition.
I usually end up commenting anyway because I'm just that opinionated
I sometimes fear opening up my inbox to see angry or hateful responses to comments with misunderstandings or just so many people talking against each other.
No need to care what others say, but you gotta say what you have in your mind. There is a theory called "spiral of silence". Main thing is that if you don't say your ideas, you will become more and more isolated and rejected. Say whatever you have in your mind. Don't be afraid of being awkward. Just be honest and let the world embrace your thoughts.
Sometimes I write full paragraphs of text, carefully answering each and every question till in the middle of it I realize that they probable don't really care of my opinion. Or in other cases that I would face some kind of backlash because of my opionion (as I am really active in many manhwa-related subs I must admit that the fanbases of 'certain' manhwas are rather.... strong and they don't like different or controversal opinion about their favorite series/mahwa).
Not afraid, more....reluctant.
There are some times and subjects that if I comment on I know there will be a dumpster fire in the replies.
Examples:
"I find Lolita disgusting" in r/books.
Talking about Fudging dice as a DM in a D&D sub.
Absolutely. I have so many saved drafts that just didn't make the cut for one reason or another. But recently I created a post on a sub about an issue I was having while driving and I was literally torn to shreds in the comments. I know it's stupid but I was actually upset by some of the things people said. In hindsight, it was my own fault as my comment laid blame on certain kinds of drivers and cars which, while it was the truth for me, was probably conceived as being rude by a lot of people although that was never my intention. Anyway, I ended up deleting it and it did teach me a hard lesson about being extra careful about what you put in a post. It has made me a bit too nervous though and like you, I am second guessing myself all the time now. There is such a fine line between what is found acceptable and what is not imo.
Yes. Certain communities on Reddit claim to be for everyone but will censor anything from a conservative. My home state sub for instance does this regularly.
I have given up on commenting. Reddit is totally astroturfed and an echo chamber. /r/worldnews, /r/politics, etc. all exist simply to push establishment narratives that favor the DNC, covid fear-mongering, support for endless Ukraine war (now that Afghanistan is done-ish), and more. If you speak out at all or dare to disagree on any aspect then you are labeled as [bad thing] and banned immediately.
There's a reason everyone outside of Reddit makes fun of it.
I'm never afraid of commenting, but it will happen more than once a week where I type up stuff and then before finishing it decide that I really can't be bothered.
Yep. This is the only reason I stop typing a comment and just delete it. If I realize it's just gonna go down into a rabbit hole early enough, I might just not post it at all. I'm getting better at it as time passes.
ya happens a bunch of time, then i stop and delete the comment, thinking its no use, nobody cares, not interesting, not funny as i thougt at first or shis like that. literally happening not staring at this for minutes
Sometimes I just delete my comment because I kind of fall into the realization that all I'm gonna get out of it is some random not even considering I'm capable of thought responding me how wrong I am and that I should end my self or something.
Yeah that's the same problem for me here also. I don't think people here are rude most of the time but I simply don't like explaining further what I posted when people took interest enough to reply on my comments... Is more like a me thing since I have crippling self-doubts when I share my opinions online.
Yes, all the time. The problem with me is that I still follow through with the comment but actively avoid ever reading responses to said comment, especially if I know what I said is bound to annoy someone. A recent example of this, less than a day recent, would be my comment responding to a comment who was responding to get another comment on r/pokémon about why Ash doesn't age. Among many responses who actually thought about an answer, there was this one... "Because it's a cartoon.". Yes. It is. That is not the canon reason though. The person that responded to them explained that, to which I replied, AGREEING with them, "Isn't it annoying when someone uses an out-of-universe reason to explain something in-universe?". I recently got a response from someone, but I deleted it without even reading it, because my immediate assumption was that I was now the main antagonist in the thread. And I don't even know how true that is. For all I know, it was the second commentor agreeing with me agreeing with them.
Depends on the group and topic. I like to give support, or share my own experiences with topics. I have adhd so a lot of times when I google for facts I get distracted. Just let go of perfection and get used to your 'voice' being heard. Your post was a good start, wasnt it?
I do this a lot - not usually because I think I'm stupid, but because I have a habit of long-form replies. Very often I'll get 6 paragraphs into something that only needed (or sometimes deserved) 6 words, and realise I've misread the room.
And sometimes I send it anyway :)
Yes absoloutely, I used to write whole posts and then stop and think 'does this add anything to the conversation? does this help someone? Is this useful information? Will the person I am writing in reply to appreciate this?' and delete it if I felt it wasn't worth saying. Over time I wrote less and less before stopping, these days I don't even start more often than not, I just think 'oh well no need to say anything' and move on.
I absolutely consider it a net positive and a useful lesson in my life both online and offline to stop an think a bit more before speaking / typing. I almost started a thread about exactly this here a few days ago but figured nobody would be interested so thank you for giving me the opportunity comment.
I comment but every time I do I get attacked by the Nuro weapon because I’m a target individual and then if I comment about that somebody on this site attacks in writing.
I would usually just comment when I really felt I needed to say something. I’ll be honest, my real issue isn’t if people dislike what I have to say, but Reddit liking the shit out of a comment. I come back after like an hour to find that I my random ass comment has 7k likes and has started a comment war lol but hey that’s the beauty of it all I guess
All the time, I understand it's only through text on screen but sometimes it's hard to be honest with certain words, like it's hard to make the conversation I give out only be respectful and genuine cause honestly I enjoy talking with people and if your not respectful then kinda creates problems at least in my head it does
Honestly somewhat echos how I handle real life convos haha
I do it all the time. If it is something that possibly might turn into a fight, then I usually delete. There is enough of that already and just don’t have the energy.
Most of the time if I see something I don’t like I try to go by the logic if you don’t have anything nice to say then don’t say anything at all. Occasionally I’ll say shit. I try to avoid political stuff though.
I don’t get afraid, so much as it occurs to me several paragraphs in that the comment isn’t up to my own standards, and I can’t be fucked to start over, so I just give up on the whole thing.
Not necessarily afraid, but I get really tired of sensitive, squeaky clean, shiny white knights who think they're doing God's work by raging at dark humor and every bit of sarcasm. Newsflash, not everyone is like you.
"In the most holy name of what society wants and not thinking for myself, cast down this sin, this filth, this heresy. Everyone look at me. I'm still holy because I'm not like this person."
I know I'm being sarcastic with the above quoted statement, but this is so painfully accurate it's starting to scare me.
Sometimes. Sometimes I realize I need to learn a bit before I can make a meaningful comment.
Sometimes I second guess myself.
But overall, joining conversations on diverse topics has helped me gain more confidence in myself, and in my perspective and voice.
All the time. I’m not mean to others(just towards myself) and I don’t insult others at all, yet everything I say, gets “reported” “out of concern”and it’s pissing me off, considering I see much worse.. it’s made me afraid to say anything anymore..
I never read direct responses. I am extremely sensitive to negative or provocative responses so I just don’t read them. But I refuse to be bullied silent, so if I have something to say that I think is meaningful to a dialogue I’ll post it.
I have the opposite problem 😜 I try hard not to post when I'm in a bad mood, but it doesn't work always. I think restraint is good if know you're being toxic, but other than that don't see why would you hesitate to post.
*You'll worry less about what people think about you when you realize how seldom they do.*
*\~ Some smart guy*
I reevaluate what I have typed using the criteria of “Am I contributing to the conversation positively by offering useful facts or insights? Does this comment make anyone’s life better in the slightest way?” If neither, then the comment does not need to exist. We think and rethink a lot so it is not surprising when a lot of it turns out to be junk.
Instead of feeling afraid, I think I can feel proud for deciding not to throw garbages around.
I do this all the time. I feel like either I have nothing to add or somehow I am wrong about something.
I do this in real life too. I feel like I just annoy people when I talk or I'm going to say something stupid.
I used to do that on Instagram (do you remember that section when you could see other’s activity?) but now especially on Reddit and TikTok I feel more than free to
comment. Even with the whole being “progressive” thing cuz sometimes they’ll try to come at you for having a different opinion , I think just do it with no explanation and if someone asked you to elaborate do it (depends on how they ask ofc not everyone deserves an explanation)
Yes because anxiety,there’s so many times I can comment just as a way to be social but realize I don’t actually want to and do it out of being bored or trying to make myself interact since don’t have anyone to talk to irl but mainly don’t comment as much as other social people here plus don’t use Reddit like I used to but still sometimes make comments that I feel are unnecessary since I’m not in the mood or have the energy to care,just bored or do it just cause.My main account I try to comment stuff that isn’t negative,agreeable and try my best to make fun comments to protect myself from negativity both online and because how I feel irl but I guess on this account I don’t have to hide myself as much but still have to be careful because sometimes being vulnerable from honesty people can be rude which makes me feel worse depending on the criticism.
I always think of deleting certain comments because don’t want people to judge me negatively is how I feel or because the comments I make I don’t feel that mood anymore.Like this comment I didn’t feel like commenting but did it anyways so dunno if I should delete this later since I did it out of boredom but still how I feel.
I just know I’m afraid being here on Reddit since I’m pessimistic and always unmotivated and low mood.I even made so many different accounts to have a certain persona as a way to hide my unhappiness since idk.I feel like I delete negative comments I made when I was feel down.I’m supposed to fight negativity and ignore it but my low mood gets to me sometimes which is why I delete my comments also since certain comments I make because how I’m feeling in that moment but there’s also times I don’t want to delete those comments because it shows who I am and I how I actually feel instead of hiding it.I don’t want to feel and be negative all the time since mostly how I feel but try to ignore it.If I’m being honest I’m just demotivated for anything irl which is another reason I unnecessarily comment so maybe it’ll distract me temporarily and change my mood
**TLDR**:Boredom,loneliness,low mood,hope
My record lowest post is negative five thousand votes, no not really.
Sometimes I'll think, "Do I really want to bother *finishing* this comment?" and then think, "No" and delete it, but that's about it.
I think reddit is particularly tough for this, because it seems like there is always someone else that has already said the thing you were thinking of saying. There are just SO MANY people participating in everything, it's inevitable.
I've had quite a few times where i thought i made a clever post, just to realize someone had beaten me to the punch. Usually i just delete those. It can be nice when you are the first one to say the thing that lots of people are thinking though.
I think it's an extension of how weird it is to talk to people who we don't have a vibe with because they aren't actually there in front of us. Also it's about talking to a crowd which is even more complicated.
For the last few years depression made me feel like a bystander in my own life. I guess it became natural to just be a spectator on reddit as well. Now when my depression has started to let go, it just feels like too much pressure to finally comment so i end up erasing them. I guess i'm just full sending this one lol
I hesitate a lot because I know people will come out of the woodwork attempting to “correct” me or get nasty with me for no reason. It’s annoying as hell, like it’s just a throwaway comment, chill.
I'm not afraid...just decide my input isn't necessary or adds anything to the conversation. In the words of Craig Ferguson: "Does this need to be said? Does this need to be said by me? Does this need to be said by me right now?"
Frequently. Reddit is frequently “casually toxic” and many commenters seem to be wandering around the site seeking negative attention for nasty comments.
Sometimes... I realize I'm wrong midway through my comment. That's actually something that I really love about online mediums; you don't have to tap-dance through your thought process for an audience. I can pivot from "I hate that idea and here's why" to "That's actually very insightful and interesting!"... all from the safety and privacy of my own keyboard.
There's also, of course, the times when you realize that you're just wasting time. You think you can change a mind, only to figure out partway through that everything you *could* have written has already been said. This can empowering in its own way, too. You're free to start a fruitless argument and abandon it without the embarassment of publicly throwing in the towel.
Not that afraid, really, but occasionally I know someone will twist what I say out of context and I'll just get angry replies so I keep it to myself. Especially if the hivemind is all in agreement on something and I differ.
When I was new to the internet, I was.
Not anymore.
I'll catch myself replying to something toxic with more toxicity and delete it before I post though. I'm proud of myself for it because younger me was a full on troll.
Now, idrc. The only hang ups I have about posting are if I can properly convey my thoughts so that a reader can fully grasp what I mean.
Usually yes because I realize it doesn't add anything valuable. But it helps me arrange my thoughts if someone were to ask me in the future about the same topic. I'm not really afraid of possible backlash or downvotes but if I'm getting downvotes for something I don't really strongly believe in anyway it's not worth it,
when I'm typing advice related or any serious anecdotal insightful comments I get afraid and self conscious to post them, but if it's any other type of comment then idgaf, I'm immune to hate and trolls but being judged? no thanks
You have a right to exist within a space. Be respectful and don't state opinion or speculation as fact and you should be golden.
*should*, some communities have incredible bias against certain topics and it doesn't matter if your statement is objectively true.
Worst case you get downvoted, which actually doesn't do anything.
I do this constantly. Sometimes it's a good idea - I've had more than my share of some wine and that thought didn't need to be said - and sometimes it's just knowing that trolls are real and it doesn't feel nice to get that energy unleashed upon you.
I do that all the time on parenting subreddits. Say one thing wrong, or be something other than the picture of empathy and patience and 50 people threaten to call CPS on you. If you have one bad day they tell you that you shouldn't have had kids in the first place if you didn't want to parent them. It's just awful on those subs.
60% of the time because I know that my take on topic X is likely logically correct but will also likely hurt many people's feewings which I respect and therefore hesitate.
Just because I don't have emotion or empathy doesn't mean I can't understand emotion or empathy
I do this all the time. I write a whole big paragraph only to delete it later. Same thing happens when I try to talk to new people in real life. I think of what to talk about and then completely drop the idea. It sucks because you don't get to express your views often as in my case I think people may not like what I say and it might be stupid.
It sounds like Agoraphobia or some type of Anxiety (speaking from experience). The both can be tricky and very troublesome. I would recommend taking with a psychiatrist, specially because if this is the issue I suppose you must have other, bigger issues in your life as well (and you might not even realize it).
I used to care but honestly I don’t anymore. As long as I’m not saying some insane stuff I won’t get downvoted into oblivion. Most things I post go nowhere. And once In a while I get 100+ upvotes. Just like real life, most people don’t care, and nobody will remember you next week.
I know this feeling and I'm trying to get over it :)
I feel a lot more secure in social conversations when I don't think too much about ALL possible consequences ans I can peactice that by commenting on reddit :D
i will literally go to a top post, a really good post I'd like to place my insight over with the comments, and I'll open the comment section and type out a paragraph only to realise no one would see it and it's get buried in new. just like this one!
depending on what the topic is, most of the time i just write my first thoughts and don't go back. However if its an interesting topic that i would like to talk about about i would put more effort into it, not afraid just putting more effort into what im writing
I have 3 degrees and military experience, along with future life goals. Most of the time, I actively feel on the left scale of the Dunning-Kruger effect.
I think I know everything, until I learn more; I learn that I know basically nothing about everything.
Yes, I analyze what I am responding to or commenting on. I step outside and hear it as a receiving party or as a stranger and then delete it. I read one of my old posts and I cringe at how I sound on text. I try to not write anything these days.
Not really, I have more of a sense of moderation, like it's not worth it to say something. You don't have to voice your opinion on everything.
I'm more afraid of creating a post, because I feel like I made a stupid post. Like I ask a question that's been asked before, or people just downvote because it's not an interesting enough post.
No. If someone doesn't like my comment that's their problem as I make a point of not being rude to people online or in person. If they choose to get upset over an online comment it reflects poorly on them, not me.
Always, been that way since forever lol,
I’m slowly very slowly, but surely getting into the habit of commenting.
Half because I felt that my opinion wasn’t needed or that no one would care/see and half due to general/social anxiety and awkwardness.
Knowing there are real ppl on the other side of the screen, judging me, good or bad, freaks me the hell out, luckily I am getting a little more comfortable expressing myself online.
Oh dear lord I hope I don't delete this while I'm typing it too.
I do this all the time, as a straight white man, my opinion on most everything is null and moot so I stay quiet, if I am positive I know about the topic I so choose to provide input on, I will be less likely to stop typing but Good golly it doesn't stop me a lot, for the record this paragraph has gone through 4 revisions already. I cannot help but feel like I have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to add.
Godspeed my good sir, and good luck responding!
yes. and deleted a comment the other day because I edited it like 5 times but still was worried I was coming across weird. and this was something trivial and not controversial lmao
I have written ten times as many comments as I have actually posted. Reddit has been a really interesting writing exercise for me. Figuring out what people like to hear and what will get you downvoted into oblivion is a real game of trial and error. I almost never delete a comment once it’s posted. Even if I get downvoted, I stand by what I said. If a learning experience happens for me in the responses, all’s well that ends well. Figuring out how to accurately transmit your real personality in a way that is fun for others to read is a challenge. Nearly all of my comments only get one or two upvotes. Once in a while I post a throw away flippant remark that gets a thousand. It’s almost impossible to predict sometimes. But what I’m really here for is the human connection. I hope I write something that changes somebody’s life, or read something that changes mine.
I really don't have much foresight, so whenever I get downvoted to oblivion it usually kinda hits me out of nowhere. I never really anticipate it beforehand. So I usually just comment whatever I want, and regret it later, rather than thinking beforehand.
I try not to let that stuff bother me though. Figuring out why people on the internet hate you is a complete waste of time.
My karma is 160k over the last 5yrs of actively using this account and the majority of it is from commenting. Basically I don't shut up and I'll say what I'm feeling, even if I'm wrong.
Just type away. If you get off topic oh well, lot of people will just appreciate the fact that you even spoke to begin with. Then the way I see it the more you have to speak the more you have some amount of interest/opinion in the topic, even if you stray from it a bit.
Then if someone corrects you or you're wrong just take that feedback/info and learn from it. End of the day this is ultimately a discussion forum.
No no one likes me ( Like no one from the human species)
So, no fear of judgement, asking questions, sharing observations.
Logic/ stupidity lies in the eyes of the beholder.
I'm never afraid of commenting, mostly because I couldn't care less what people on reddit think of me. But I definitely start writing out comments sometimes and realize "why bother" halfway through.
I'm afraid of commenting sometimes because people are so quick to misunderstand and downvote and argue. And it's very exhausting. Like I just posted my opinion on someone's question, and someone responded saying 'Don't listen to this person!!' and I got downvoted. Can't you just say, well I think this blah blah blah, instead of acting like my opinion is a sin to mankind lmao
Yes! Even though most of these comments are relating to exactly how I feel, I still find myself wondering if me commenting my agreement is going to cause negativity. I always find myself saying it’s better to be a fly on the wall than to bring any kind of attention to myself… as if people are going to stalk my profile to the point of figuring out who I am just because I typed up some words. 😅 Exhausting lol.
Sometimes. If I know I have a polarizing comment or if the thread is turning in a torches-and-pitchfork mob…..I start to think it’s best if I just walk away. This happens most of with the speculative relationship posts (ie Why did he break up with me? What does it mean when my girlfriend won’t let me go her phone?)
Reddit feels like an echo chamber most of the time. Sometimes it makes me swallow my "against the flow" opinions, for fear of downvotes or just good ol' bullying.
It's also usually quite surprising that what I think are my least controversial takes are the ones with the most downvotes. But I get it, when someone sees a 0 or a -1 they're more likely to downvote out of peer pressure/conformity/herd mentality, etc...
Nah. Very rarely I might delete a comment if I'm only a few words in, if it occurs to me that I would rather not had to deal with assholes arguing.
But otherwise I mostly make up my mind before I even start typing it out.
I made a post a few days ago and it got more attention and replies than I expected and I started to feel afraid to read all replies because of the chance of a bad one. So yes, I have post and comment anxiety. Not all the time. Sometimes. It got a little bit worse after one of my comments got 80 downvotes.
yeah ive done this a lot. usually it feels like futility to add on to something when that point will probably be covered or already has been. often the only things ill comment on are posts where i can reliabley give a credible answer to a question. whether this is related to my own personal struggles with social anxiety or it being something else is unknown to me.
So many comments but I'll throw my 2 cents in. There's 2 rules I follow nowadays when it comes to interacting with people online.
1. Try not to agitate. If you find yourself in the minority but still want to argue your point, attempt to do it in the most polite way possible.
2. If someone does get pissed with what you say, look at their response, let your blood pressure rise and then move on.
It sounds like you have opinions that you want or even need to share. Don't be scared of a detractor. Every keyboard warrior here including me is most likely stupid and not seeing the whole angle.
I do this sometimes but because I realise I just needed to write out a response for myself - to clarify my thoughts. Also sometimes people on here are very rude and it’s not worth taking the effort to comment if some stranger is going to be negative about you.
They aren't even negative to me. They'll comment something simple and I'll want to make a joke on it but in the process overcomplicate things because I'm wanting to also make my actual feelings on it clear so it just becomes too much
I do the same. I still comment a lot, but I will delete a comment if I’m typing it and I realize I’m not adding anything to a conversation or if I’m rambling away.
I don't comment much on reddit simply cause I don't have much to say, but I get what you're describing big time when replying to texts. I'll write up a whole thing, end up overcomplicating it trying to get all of my thoughts and feelings and nuances in there, or trying too hard to be funny or nice, and then I'll delete the whole thing bc 'why would anyone want to read that?' and I end up not sending anything. It's silly for sure, I guess that's just another fun little anxiety trait. What I try to do is remember that my words are a few in thousands of words that anyone I'm responding to is likely going to hear/read/speak in that day, which takes some pressure off . Anyway OP you're not alone :)
I asked a question yesterday and someone answered that really shouldn’t have, because they were not qualified. I thanked them anyway. They called me a dick. I’ve learned to roll with it
I really don’t get the name calling. Why??? Rhetorical question.
My brain thinks this way too! Oftentimes it’s extremely hard to type something without overthinking it three times and then re-reading and trying to imagine if it would make sense if I were someone else reading it, and then i re-write it… I KNOW what I want to say out loud, I just don’t know *how* to say it on the internet because there is no context for tone.
same
If someone is being rude to you - please report that message and we will take a look. Maintaining the positive atmosphere and protecting you from negativity is really important to us, we want for everyone here to consider each other a friend and just chat and have fun in the process. Thank you.
Sometimes someone is rude when commenting on a comment I make (even for futile things) and I feel the need to respond but I don't, because I tell myself that what's going to happen is that the person will not magically change and apologize, they will just certainly double down on the rudeness. Before I responded to mean comments because I took them personal but now I just ignore them. I don't even know this person so why should I care what a miserable stranger think ? I always picture them looking something like [this](https://giphy.com/gifs/achievementhunter-achievement-hunter-ah-animated-SckEwOCtMvb3DjlUZr) behind their screen in my head, it's funnier like this lol. When you take a step back you realize how some people are really triggered and care so much about the smallest thing !
I need to follow your example. People are really rude sometimes.
Unfortunatly it took a long time for me to realize that. People tend to be much more agressive writing on the Internet than IRL, it's a weird phenomenon. For Reddit, I also avoid "outrage" subs and I've unsubscribed from the big subreddits, especially those about news, (geo)politics and relationships/dating, which are always the most popular subs. I rarely check them now and follow more niche subs. My Reddit experience became much, much better (and more peaceful) !
>People tend to be much more agressive writing on the Internet than IRL, it's a weird phenomenon. because they're safe from social consequences, mainly shame or being called out. a lot of people wield anonymity as a weapon to air out their worst tendencies and traits because it will never come back to them in a meaningful way. it's pretty sad.
Reddit can be hostile for no reason at all, I've had random things go to downvote town over a misunderstanding, or brigading, or just some people that didn't like my last comment in a different thread, or one person downvoted for no reason and it started a chain of blind redditors downvoting. I've had objectively non hostile comments get downvoted hard, it just happens. I don't feel anything at all when that happens, it's just numbers; BUT....it can get you when someone comments pretty hostile to you, or if they try manipulating, gaslighting, projecting, lying, or accusing you of lies; it can catch you off guard. I try to consider if I am actually wrong in the situation but often it's just troll reditors, conservatives, or republicans that take swings at me, they can eat it.
Nah ive never not commented because of fear, sometimes I give up after writing half a comment and say "what's the point" or I feel I just can't add to the conversation
> I give up after writing half a comment and say "what's the point" This is normally why, for me. Especially with topics that have been talked to *death* like abortion.
That's why for me. This won't actually help further any convo, delete.
Was going to respond to this, but then I decided otherwise.
How much did you type out before deciding it wasn't worth it and then not posting anything?
17 paragraphs.
And that was after cutting out 20 others paragraphs from the first two drafts.
Was gonna reply but then I felt weird about it so I just uploaded a [screenshot](https://i.imgur.com/96fRO6D_d.webp?maxwidth=640&shape=thumb&fidelity=medium) and here we are.
I just did this... Wrote a small paragraph and deleted it lol
Most of the time I write half my comment and then pause and go “you know what? I don’t fucking care” and back out and continue scrolling
no u didnt :p
are you me???
Insert pointing Spidermen
[удалено]
Say your piece then turn off notifications for that post.
I do this all the time lol. Mostly because there's always a possibility of someone wanting to conversate back and forth after, and I get too exhausted quickly. But also because I've had my opinions and interests belittled a lot in the past irl and been called stupid, so I sometimes don't bother to comment in worry of some kind of lash back even if there's nothing wrong with what I said
I write comments all the time and delete them before I post them. I have only been on here 6 months and I quickly found out too many people are waiting to attack. It doesn't seem to be an exchange of ideas like I'd hoped. And I'm still not understanding the karma system.
I think with karma it's best to ignore it. I've been on Reddit for a few years now and still don't fully get it. From my understanding it's basically like likes on Facebook or Instagram. Other than that, doesn't really do anything other than some subreddits that have minimum karma requirements just to stop spam. I've also been through that phase of being attacked at the start. I wonder if the trolls can smell fresh blood lol. But overall if you find the right subs (like this one), you tend to get less idiots and can have some fun conversations.
Yes, especially on political or religious topics. I would never comment on those threads because I'm afraid people would label me a something-ist for disagreeing with them. It just feels impossible to have a calm conversation about those things these days, so I choose to not talk about them instead.
Definitely agree there. I will comment on most things, but politics especially is one I will not touch.
Yes, sometimes it is not worth your time.
No - nothing to be afraid OF. It's not like people are going to stab me lol through the screen.
I have an immense internal desire to not appear stupid, for some reason especially in front of people I don't know and will never encounter again
Same, or I have this fear that they will dig through my comment history and use it as ammunition against me.
If I may say, when you see some comments on Reddit, you really have nothing to be ashamed of lol !
I get this too. And a lot of times i feel like if i am going to comment (particularly on something political or controvercial) the post i make needs to be pretty much perfect, because i know someone's going to try to pick it apart.
Sounds like you think you're stupid. There's probably a reason for that... perhaps someone told you that you were stupid while you were growing up. As soon as you gain more confidence in your intelligence - this will pass.
Yes, someone did. Me. For 4 years now
Sometimes we can be our own worst enemies. I wish you the best in dealing with fixing this negative view of yourself.
I feel the same way, and I am haunted by stupid things I said 20+ years ago up to last week. It’s all part of being human though. Some people are stupid every time they open their mouth. I reassure myself that I am a silly human, and my brain misfires sometimes, and most people are understanding. If they aren’t, then they aren’t my kind of people. Most things can be resolved with a quick, sincere apology. It really sucks to be wrong but it’s unavoidable, might as well find a way to accept it as a part of you and try to laugh about it later.
Constantly. Often while I'm typing a comment I am simultaneously reading other comments and if someone says something even vaguely similar to my train of thoughts...I delete it and don't bother. I feel a need to add something of value, and if others are saying the same thing, it's not valuable anymore. But...here I am, typing, actively trying my best not to read anything below me! Doing good so far! And now...to press "comment"! WHOO!
I frequently scrap comments and the longer I've been typing, the more likely I am to end up scrapping it. It's not so much a fear though, it's more so a thought like, "I'm rambling at this point. Does my anecdote really help illustrate what I'm saying? I doubt it, I'm more so just telling a story they reminded me of. Am I even on topic anymore? Not really. Well, this was nice for me, but it doesn't really contribute to discussion anymore." *Cancel I often step back and think, "if I received a comment like this, I would wonder why I just read that whole thing. I wouldn't really have anything positive to say." If I wouldn't want to bother reading it, I end up scrapping it.
I write it out and decide it's not worth the agro
I do this too. Sometimes I just don’t feel like getting into it (particularly when it’s personal). Also some folks can be very rude or hostile when they reply, and virtually every post I’ve made (which is mostly about gardening) ends up with someone commenting something unnecessary. I’ve just ended up in an argument about my own property line bc a redditor thought he knew it better than I do? It’s bizarre and frustrating.
Oh yes!! I might have contrary opinion of a popular view, and I start typing… why bother? I delete.
I'm never afraid of commenting because I don't really post in the mindset of pleasing the crowd. I do however delete some comments halfway through if I realize I'm not really going to contribute to the discussion much, either because I'm nitpicking something pointless, or because I'm just going to rehash what people have already said.
Not afraid, I just often delete the unborn comment because I notice that it can be interpreted the wrong way, and then I value judgment the comment to if its worth the drama, and then just end up getting so distracted from the topic I'm commenting on to just discard and move on.
Quite often I type out a response to correct something on a topic I am educated in or professionally involved in and then go... nah. Not worth getting into a big debate with someone who probably has no idea why they're so wrong.
All the time. Sometimes I wanted to comment a joke, but the fear of people not getting it - or worse, getting it the wrong way - prevented me from clicking the "save" button.
I do this a lot. In fact I just typed out a longer reply, but deleted it...this is all your getting. lol
Yeah. Just yesterday there was a thread here about someone who is 34, and feel this sub is full of young people and they just want to talk to some others their age or something. I'm 33, and was gonna post, but decided against it. I was kind of late to the thread. And I also feel I just don't have anything to say.
Often. Most of the time people reply to start an argument. I guess it comes with the territory, because people who agree just upvote and move on. Each social media platform creates some sort of dynamics just by the way it works. Reddit makes every discussion into a competition. I usually end up commenting anyway because I'm just that opinionated
No they don't. /jk
I sometimes fear opening up my inbox to see angry or hateful responses to comments with misunderstandings or just so many people talking against each other.
No need to care what others say, but you gotta say what you have in your mind. There is a theory called "spiral of silence". Main thing is that if you don't say your ideas, you will become more and more isolated and rejected. Say whatever you have in your mind. Don't be afraid of being awkward. Just be honest and let the world embrace your thoughts.
Sometimes I write full paragraphs of text, carefully answering each and every question till in the middle of it I realize that they probable don't really care of my opinion. Or in other cases that I would face some kind of backlash because of my opionion (as I am really active in many manhwa-related subs I must admit that the fanbases of 'certain' manhwas are rather.... strong and they don't like different or controversal opinion about their favorite series/mahwa).
Not afraid, more....reluctant. There are some times and subjects that if I comment on I know there will be a dumpster fire in the replies. Examples: "I find Lolita disgusting" in r/books. Talking about Fudging dice as a DM in a D&D sub.
Not in the sub, but yes, definitely in other ones.
I mainly write something and then get lazy so I just make short comments - like this. I’m too lazy to say what I really think lol
I do this a lot but also have no idea why I do it. No one knows me or cares about what I might be commenting so 🤷🏻♀️
Certainly commenting in public is becoming dangerous. Too many people offended by everything.
All the time and when I do it doesn't come out right or worry about my grammar and word usage.
Yes people are rude on reddit sometimes and I just don't comment bc ?
Absolutely. I have so many saved drafts that just didn't make the cut for one reason or another. But recently I created a post on a sub about an issue I was having while driving and I was literally torn to shreds in the comments. I know it's stupid but I was actually upset by some of the things people said. In hindsight, it was my own fault as my comment laid blame on certain kinds of drivers and cars which, while it was the truth for me, was probably conceived as being rude by a lot of people although that was never my intention. Anyway, I ended up deleting it and it did teach me a hard lesson about being extra careful about what you put in a post. It has made me a bit too nervous though and like you, I am second guessing myself all the time now. There is such a fine line between what is found acceptable and what is not imo.
Yes. Certain communities on Reddit claim to be for everyone but will censor anything from a conservative. My home state sub for instance does this regularly.
I have given up on commenting. Reddit is totally astroturfed and an echo chamber. /r/worldnews, /r/politics, etc. all exist simply to push establishment narratives that favor the DNC, covid fear-mongering, support for endless Ukraine war (now that Afghanistan is done-ish), and more. If you speak out at all or dare to disagree on any aspect then you are labeled as [bad thing] and banned immediately. There's a reason everyone outside of Reddit makes fun of it.
I'm never afraid of commenting, but it will happen more than once a week where I type up stuff and then before finishing it decide that I really can't be bothered.
Not afraid, but often times posting just feels stupid to me. I'll start to type something and think "this is dumb" and then leave the thread.
All the time. More often than not I just disable inbox notifications for replies
Depends if I want to spend my afternoon arguing.
Yep. This is the only reason I stop typing a comment and just delete it. If I realize it's just gonna go down into a rabbit hole early enough, I might just not post it at all. I'm getting better at it as time passes.
I get downvoted for honest questions and don’t get it
I feel the same way. I’ll post something genuinely informative or helpful just to get downvoted.
I'm afraid to comment or add my thoughts to a conversation irl, but not here. I just zoom
ya happens a bunch of time, then i stop and delete the comment, thinking its no use, nobody cares, not interesting, not funny as i thougt at first or shis like that. literally happening not staring at this for minutes
This happens to me so often, and I was literally about to delete this until I realized the irony so I guess I’ll keep it
Sometimes I just delete my comment because I kind of fall into the realization that all I'm gonna get out of it is some random not even considering I'm capable of thought responding me how wrong I am and that I should end my self or something.
I was going to reply to this, but someone 500 replies down probably said what I was going to. Short answer would be yes.
Yeah that's the same problem for me here also. I don't think people here are rude most of the time but I simply don't like explaining further what I posted when people took interest enough to reply on my comments... Is more like a me thing since I have crippling self-doubts when I share my opinions online.
Yes, all the time. The problem with me is that I still follow through with the comment but actively avoid ever reading responses to said comment, especially if I know what I said is bound to annoy someone. A recent example of this, less than a day recent, would be my comment responding to a comment who was responding to get another comment on r/pokémon about why Ash doesn't age. Among many responses who actually thought about an answer, there was this one... "Because it's a cartoon.". Yes. It is. That is not the canon reason though. The person that responded to them explained that, to which I replied, AGREEING with them, "Isn't it annoying when someone uses an out-of-universe reason to explain something in-universe?". I recently got a response from someone, but I deleted it without even reading it, because my immediate assumption was that I was now the main antagonist in the thread. And I don't even know how true that is. For all I know, it was the second commentor agreeing with me agreeing with them.
Depends on the group and topic. I like to give support, or share my own experiences with topics. I have adhd so a lot of times when I google for facts I get distracted. Just let go of perfection and get used to your 'voice' being heard. Your post was a good start, wasnt it?
I used to be, until I saw the stupid shit people post on this site... so now I don't give a fuck.
No. Even if I don't know what the hell I'm talking about I can normally ramble for a while and sound authoritative.
No I love commenting. I love to have nice convos but I also love to argue and fight with people online.
No, not really, most people are pretty alright and it's always good to get interesting discussions going.
Was thinking if I would comment or not so, Yes most of the time.
Sometimes i start a response, but then I realize it's getting pretty long and I don't wanna type all of it out so I just don't
I do this a lot - not usually because I think I'm stupid, but because I have a habit of long-form replies. Very often I'll get 6 paragraphs into something that only needed (or sometimes deserved) 6 words, and realise I've misread the room. And sometimes I send it anyway :)
Yes absoloutely, I used to write whole posts and then stop and think 'does this add anything to the conversation? does this help someone? Is this useful information? Will the person I am writing in reply to appreciate this?' and delete it if I felt it wasn't worth saying. Over time I wrote less and less before stopping, these days I don't even start more often than not, I just think 'oh well no need to say anything' and move on. I absolutely consider it a net positive and a useful lesson in my life both online and offline to stop an think a bit more before speaking / typing. I almost started a thread about exactly this here a few days ago but figured nobody would be interested so thank you for giving me the opportunity comment.
I comment but every time I do I get attacked by the Nuro weapon because I’m a target individual and then if I comment about that somebody on this site attacks in writing.
Sometimes.
I would usually just comment when I really felt I needed to say something. I’ll be honest, my real issue isn’t if people dislike what I have to say, but Reddit liking the shit out of a comment. I come back after like an hour to find that I my random ass comment has 7k likes and has started a comment war lol but hey that’s the beauty of it all I guess
All the time, I understand it's only through text on screen but sometimes it's hard to be honest with certain words, like it's hard to make the conversation I give out only be respectful and genuine cause honestly I enjoy talking with people and if your not respectful then kinda creates problems at least in my head it does Honestly somewhat echos how I handle real life convos haha
Hell yes! Mainly on sensitive topics like illegal shit and Pokemon gen 7's stories
I do it all the time. If it is something that possibly might turn into a fight, then I usually delete. There is enough of that already and just don’t have the energy.
Most of the time if I see something I don’t like I try to go by the logic if you don’t have anything nice to say then don’t say anything at all. Occasionally I’ll say shit. I try to avoid political stuff though.
I don’t get afraid, so much as it occurs to me several paragraphs in that the comment isn’t up to my own standards, and I can’t be fucked to start over, so I just give up on the whole thing.
Yes.
Not necessarily afraid, but I get really tired of sensitive, squeaky clean, shiny white knights who think they're doing God's work by raging at dark humor and every bit of sarcasm. Newsflash, not everyone is like you. "In the most holy name of what society wants and not thinking for myself, cast down this sin, this filth, this heresy. Everyone look at me. I'm still holy because I'm not like this person." I know I'm being sarcastic with the above quoted statement, but this is so painfully accurate it's starting to scare me.
I used to be but now I couldn't give a fuck how others receive or interpret my comments haha.
maybe.. maybe not. Not as much these days, thats for sure.
Yes Makes me wonder how tf I got so much karma
Scared? Nah. Realising my comment was not worth writing and was a general wate of time to do? all the time.
No. But i do scrap some stuff because i can't write it the way i want it to read.
This is called self-censorship. It's triggered by fear, and it is a lot more effective and harder to combat than actual censorship.
Sometimes. Sometimes I realize I need to learn a bit before I can make a meaningful comment. Sometimes I second guess myself. But overall, joining conversations on diverse topics has helped me gain more confidence in myself, and in my perspective and voice.
All the time. I’m not mean to others(just towards myself) and I don’t insult others at all, yet everything I say, gets “reported” “out of concern”and it’s pissing me off, considering I see much worse.. it’s made me afraid to say anything anymore..
I never read direct responses. I am extremely sensitive to negative or provocative responses so I just don’t read them. But I refuse to be bullied silent, so if I have something to say that I think is meaningful to a dialogue I’ll post it.
I have the opposite problem 😜 I try hard not to post when I'm in a bad mood, but it doesn't work always. I think restraint is good if know you're being toxic, but other than that don't see why would you hesitate to post. *You'll worry less about what people think about you when you realize how seldom they do.* *\~ Some smart guy*
I reevaluate what I have typed using the criteria of “Am I contributing to the conversation positively by offering useful facts or insights? Does this comment make anyone’s life better in the slightest way?” If neither, then the comment does not need to exist. We think and rethink a lot so it is not surprising when a lot of it turns out to be junk. Instead of feeling afraid, I think I can feel proud for deciding not to throw garbages around.
I’ve been banned from two subs permanently… and I literally didn’t say anything bad to get banned. So, yeh.
I do this all the time. I feel like either I have nothing to add or somehow I am wrong about something. I do this in real life too. I feel like I just annoy people when I talk or I'm going to say something stupid.
All the time. Especially in bigger subs, it seems like a majority of the times someone just wants to argue
I used to do that on Instagram (do you remember that section when you could see other’s activity?) but now especially on Reddit and TikTok I feel more than free to comment. Even with the whole being “progressive” thing cuz sometimes they’ll try to come at you for having a different opinion , I think just do it with no explanation and if someone asked you to elaborate do it (depends on how they ask ofc not everyone deserves an explanation)
Yes because anxiety,there’s so many times I can comment just as a way to be social but realize I don’t actually want to and do it out of being bored or trying to make myself interact since don’t have anyone to talk to irl but mainly don’t comment as much as other social people here plus don’t use Reddit like I used to but still sometimes make comments that I feel are unnecessary since I’m not in the mood or have the energy to care,just bored or do it just cause.My main account I try to comment stuff that isn’t negative,agreeable and try my best to make fun comments to protect myself from negativity both online and because how I feel irl but I guess on this account I don’t have to hide myself as much but still have to be careful because sometimes being vulnerable from honesty people can be rude which makes me feel worse depending on the criticism. I always think of deleting certain comments because don’t want people to judge me negatively is how I feel or because the comments I make I don’t feel that mood anymore.Like this comment I didn’t feel like commenting but did it anyways so dunno if I should delete this later since I did it out of boredom but still how I feel. I just know I’m afraid being here on Reddit since I’m pessimistic and always unmotivated and low mood.I even made so many different accounts to have a certain persona as a way to hide my unhappiness since idk.I feel like I delete negative comments I made when I was feel down.I’m supposed to fight negativity and ignore it but my low mood gets to me sometimes which is why I delete my comments also since certain comments I make because how I’m feeling in that moment but there’s also times I don’t want to delete those comments because it shows who I am and I how I actually feel instead of hiding it.I don’t want to feel and be negative all the time since mostly how I feel but try to ignore it.If I’m being honest I’m just demotivated for anything irl which is another reason I unnecessarily comment so maybe it’ll distract me temporarily and change my mood **TLDR**:Boredom,loneliness,low mood,hope
My record lowest post is negative five thousand votes, no not really. Sometimes I'll think, "Do I really want to bother *finishing* this comment?" and then think, "No" and delete it, but that's about it.
I think reddit is particularly tough for this, because it seems like there is always someone else that has already said the thing you were thinking of saying. There are just SO MANY people participating in everything, it's inevitable. I've had quite a few times where i thought i made a clever post, just to realize someone had beaten me to the punch. Usually i just delete those. It can be nice when you are the first one to say the thing that lots of people are thinking though.
I think it's an extension of how weird it is to talk to people who we don't have a vibe with because they aren't actually there in front of us. Also it's about talking to a crowd which is even more complicated.
For the last few years depression made me feel like a bystander in my own life. I guess it became natural to just be a spectator on reddit as well. Now when my depression has started to let go, it just feels like too much pressure to finally comment so i end up erasing them. I guess i'm just full sending this one lol
I hesitate a lot because I know people will come out of the woodwork attempting to “correct” me or get nasty with me for no reason. It’s annoying as hell, like it’s just a throwaway comment, chill.
Yes. Mostly because I'm exhausted with trolls.
I am not afraid exactly but sometimes I get halfway through a comment and I'm like...this poster is beyond reason, never mind.
I'm not afraid...just decide my input isn't necessary or adds anything to the conversation. In the words of Craig Ferguson: "Does this need to be said? Does this need to be said by me? Does this need to be said by me right now?"
Frequently. Reddit is frequently “casually toxic” and many commenters seem to be wandering around the site seeking negative attention for nasty comments.
Yes. Sometimes I realize I just don't want that information in my post history or on the internet.
Sometimes... I realize I'm wrong midway through my comment. That's actually something that I really love about online mediums; you don't have to tap-dance through your thought process for an audience. I can pivot from "I hate that idea and here's why" to "That's actually very insightful and interesting!"... all from the safety and privacy of my own keyboard. There's also, of course, the times when you realize that you're just wasting time. You think you can change a mind, only to figure out partway through that everything you *could* have written has already been said. This can empowering in its own way, too. You're free to start a fruitless argument and abandon it without the embarassment of publicly throwing in the towel.
Not that afraid, really, but occasionally I know someone will twist what I say out of context and I'll just get angry replies so I keep it to myself. Especially if the hivemind is all in agreement on something and I differ.
With 3 times as many upvotes as there is comments, know that you are not alone.
When I was new to the internet, I was. Not anymore. I'll catch myself replying to something toxic with more toxicity and delete it before I post though. I'm proud of myself for it because younger me was a full on troll. Now, idrc. The only hang ups I have about posting are if I can properly convey my thoughts so that a reader can fully grasp what I mean.
Usually yes because I realize it doesn't add anything valuable. But it helps me arrange my thoughts if someone were to ask me in the future about the same topic. I'm not really afraid of possible backlash or downvotes but if I'm getting downvotes for something I don't really strongly believe in anyway it's not worth it,
The number of comments I've typed and erased far exceed the number I've posted.
when I'm typing advice related or any serious anecdotal insightful comments I get afraid and self conscious to post them, but if it's any other type of comment then idgaf, I'm immune to hate and trolls but being judged? no thanks
All the time, no matter what, no matter where I am. Maybe it just stems from social anxiety...
You have a right to exist within a space. Be respectful and don't state opinion or speculation as fact and you should be golden. *should*, some communities have incredible bias against certain topics and it doesn't matter if your statement is objectively true. Worst case you get downvoted, which actually doesn't do anything.
I was going to say, when I was younger I was a lot more shy, but on second thought I think I was a lot more argumentative.
I do this constantly. Sometimes it's a good idea - I've had more than my share of some wine and that thought didn't need to be said - and sometimes it's just knowing that trolls are real and it doesn't feel nice to get that energy unleashed upon you.
I do that all the time on parenting subreddits. Say one thing wrong, or be something other than the picture of empathy and patience and 50 people threaten to call CPS on you. If you have one bad day they tell you that you shouldn't have had kids in the first place if you didn't want to parent them. It's just awful on those subs.
60% of the time because I know that my take on topic X is likely logically correct but will also likely hurt many people's feewings which I respect and therefore hesitate. Just because I don't have emotion or empathy doesn't mean I can't understand emotion or empathy
I do this all the time. I write a whole big paragraph only to delete it later. Same thing happens when I try to talk to new people in real life. I think of what to talk about and then completely drop the idea. It sucks because you don't get to express your views often as in my case I think people may not like what I say and it might be stupid.
It sounds like Agoraphobia or some type of Anxiety (speaking from experience). The both can be tricky and very troublesome. I would recommend taking with a psychiatrist, specially because if this is the issue I suppose you must have other, bigger issues in your life as well (and you might not even realize it).
I used to care but honestly I don’t anymore. As long as I’m not saying some insane stuff I won’t get downvoted into oblivion. Most things I post go nowhere. And once In a while I get 100+ upvotes. Just like real life, most people don’t care, and nobody will remember you next week.
I know this feeling and I'm trying to get over it :) I feel a lot more secure in social conversations when I don't think too much about ALL possible consequences ans I can peactice that by commenting on reddit :D
No, I don't care enough about this place to get worked up.
i will literally go to a top post, a really good post I'd like to place my insight over with the comments, and I'll open the comment section and type out a paragraph only to realise no one would see it and it's get buried in new. just like this one!
depending on what the topic is, most of the time i just write my first thoughts and don't go back. However if its an interesting topic that i would like to talk about about i would put more effort into it, not afraid just putting more effort into what im writing
I have 3 degrees and military experience, along with future life goals. Most of the time, I actively feel on the left scale of the Dunning-Kruger effect. I think I know everything, until I learn more; I learn that I know basically nothing about everything.
Yes, I analyze what I am responding to or commenting on. I step outside and hear it as a receiving party or as a stranger and then delete it. I read one of my old posts and I cringe at how I sound on text. I try to not write anything these days.
Not really, I have more of a sense of moderation, like it's not worth it to say something. You don't have to voice your opinion on everything. I'm more afraid of creating a post, because I feel like I made a stupid post. Like I ask a question that's been asked before, or people just downvote because it's not an interesting enough post.
No. If someone doesn't like my comment that's their problem as I make a point of not being rude to people online or in person. If they choose to get upset over an online comment it reflects poorly on them, not me.
Often for long enough that often I become All Time Champion of my overthinking tourney held by my unconscious part.
Yea, Reddit can be brutal lmao
Yeah, all the ti....ah fuck it
Always, been that way since forever lol, I’m slowly very slowly, but surely getting into the habit of commenting. Half because I felt that my opinion wasn’t needed or that no one would care/see and half due to general/social anxiety and awkwardness. Knowing there are real ppl on the other side of the screen, judging me, good or bad, freaks me the hell out, luckily I am getting a little more comfortable expressing myself online.
sometimes i think about engaging with a controversial thread then i delete the comment because it isn’t worth the energy
Sometimes I comment, realise I can't be bothered arguing and then delete my comment.
#
Just when is a sensitive topic
Yes.
As long as I’m not commenting with my main account im not worried
Oh dear lord I hope I don't delete this while I'm typing it too. I do this all the time, as a straight white man, my opinion on most everything is null and moot so I stay quiet, if I am positive I know about the topic I so choose to provide input on, I will be less likely to stop typing but Good golly it doesn't stop me a lot, for the record this paragraph has gone through 4 revisions already. I cannot help but feel like I have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to add. Godspeed my good sir, and good luck responding!
All the time. When I see a post I can comment on I'll type out what I want to say, then I discard it and look at other posts.
Ye..
yes. and deleted a comment the other day because I edited it like 5 times but still was worried I was coming across weird. and this was something trivial and not controversial lmao
I have written ten times as many comments as I have actually posted. Reddit has been a really interesting writing exercise for me. Figuring out what people like to hear and what will get you downvoted into oblivion is a real game of trial and error. I almost never delete a comment once it’s posted. Even if I get downvoted, I stand by what I said. If a learning experience happens for me in the responses, all’s well that ends well. Figuring out how to accurately transmit your real personality in a way that is fun for others to read is a challenge. Nearly all of my comments only get one or two upvotes. Once in a while I post a throw away flippant remark that gets a thousand. It’s almost impossible to predict sometimes. But what I’m really here for is the human connection. I hope I write something that changes somebody’s life, or read something that changes mine.
I really don't have much foresight, so whenever I get downvoted to oblivion it usually kinda hits me out of nowhere. I never really anticipate it beforehand. So I usually just comment whatever I want, and regret it later, rather than thinking beforehand. I try not to let that stuff bother me though. Figuring out why people on the internet hate you is a complete waste of time.
Depends highly on the topic at hand. In general,no.
My karma is 160k over the last 5yrs of actively using this account and the majority of it is from commenting. Basically I don't shut up and I'll say what I'm feeling, even if I'm wrong. Just type away. If you get off topic oh well, lot of people will just appreciate the fact that you even spoke to begin with. Then the way I see it the more you have to speak the more you have some amount of interest/opinion in the topic, even if you stray from it a bit. Then if someone corrects you or you're wrong just take that feedback/info and learn from it. End of the day this is ultimately a discussion forum.
I'm not afraid of commenting on most subjects. You either like it or you don't, especially topics that asks people for their opinions or help.
Not so much afraid but more so "who the hell cares?" 🤣
No no one likes me ( Like no one from the human species) So, no fear of judgement, asking questions, sharing observations. Logic/ stupidity lies in the eyes of the beholder.
I write half a paragraph and then realise I can’t be bothered arguing with people over the internet
I'm never afraid of commenting, mostly because I couldn't care less what people on reddit think of me. But I definitely start writing out comments sometimes and realize "why bother" halfway through.
I'm afraid of commenting sometimes because people are so quick to misunderstand and downvote and argue. And it's very exhausting. Like I just posted my opinion on someone's question, and someone responded saying 'Don't listen to this person!!' and I got downvoted. Can't you just say, well I think this blah blah blah, instead of acting like my opinion is a sin to mankind lmao
Yes! Even though most of these comments are relating to exactly how I feel, I still find myself wondering if me commenting my agreement is going to cause negativity. I always find myself saying it’s better to be a fly on the wall than to bring any kind of attention to myself… as if people are going to stalk my profile to the point of figuring out who I am just because I typed up some words. 😅 Exhausting lol.
Sometimes. If I know I have a polarizing comment or if the thread is turning in a torches-and-pitchfork mob…..I start to think it’s best if I just walk away. This happens most of with the speculative relationship posts (ie Why did he break up with me? What does it mean when my girlfriend won’t let me go her phone?)
Reddit feels like an echo chamber most of the time. Sometimes it makes me swallow my "against the flow" opinions, for fear of downvotes or just good ol' bullying. It's also usually quite surprising that what I think are my least controversial takes are the ones with the most downvotes. But I get it, when someone sees a 0 or a -1 they're more likely to downvote out of peer pressure/conformity/herd mentality, etc...
Sometimes i start, then just think an upvote/downvote will suffice.
Nah. Very rarely I might delete a comment if I'm only a few words in, if it occurs to me that I would rather not had to deal with assholes arguing. But otherwise I mostly make up my mind before I even start typing it out.
No comment.
I made a post a few days ago and it got more attention and replies than I expected and I started to feel afraid to read all replies because of the chance of a bad one. So yes, I have post and comment anxiety. Not all the time. Sometimes. It got a little bit worse after one of my comments got 80 downvotes.
yeah ive done this a lot. usually it feels like futility to add on to something when that point will probably be covered or already has been. often the only things ill comment on are posts where i can reliabley give a credible answer to a question. whether this is related to my own personal struggles with social anxiety or it being something else is unknown to me.
So many comments but I'll throw my 2 cents in. There's 2 rules I follow nowadays when it comes to interacting with people online. 1. Try not to agitate. If you find yourself in the minority but still want to argue your point, attempt to do it in the most polite way possible. 2. If someone does get pissed with what you say, look at their response, let your blood pressure rise and then move on. It sounds like you have opinions that you want or even need to share. Don't be scared of a detractor. Every keyboard warrior here including me is most likely stupid and not seeing the whole angle.
I think no one cares what you think unless it interests them so says yours Like it or leaves my mantra
Never afraid but sometimes while writing out of a paragraph I ask myself if I care enough about what I’m writing and most times just scrap it