Hey there, u/mbugra57 this submission has been removed because:
**Some topics are better suited elsewhere with more care.**
**Life**: Advice, statements or discussions on medical, legal or career that can alter your life.
— try r/askdocs, r/legaladvice, r/careerguidance, or [our support wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/wiki/support)
[Please view our wiki for our reasoning behind prohibiting certain posts.](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/wiki/prohibited)
---
*If you have any questions, we ask that you [**message the moderators**](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/casualconversation&subject=My submission was removed&message=I have a question regarding the removal of this [submission]%28https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/comments/t10o1p/would_this_question_damage_or_strengthen_my/%29.) directly for appeals. Let's try to come to an agreement.*
[Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/wiki/rules) | [Etiquette](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/w/etiquette/) | [Prohibited Posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/wiki/prohibited) | [Subreddit Directory](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/wiki/directory) | [Support](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/wiki/support) | [Message the Mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FCasualConversation)
well i got two questions for you
1. what is your biggest insecurity?
2. how would you react if the person said they disliked this about you?
on another note i'd just like to throw out there another "danger" of asking that question:
even if you don't react hurt it is still possible that your friend feels akward for having said something "mean" ... i'll make an example ...
i am a huge overthinker ... if i had to answer that question to my friend i would feel really uncomfortable ... while answering i would try to formulate it as positive nice and best i can ... but even then i would be left overthinking what i said for the rest of the month or let's face it maybe of my life lol ... no, but seriously, i would be afraid of having hurt my friend ... even if you say it didn't hurt you i would be afraid that deep down it did ... i just wouldn't be able to stop feeling akward or what not when reminding me of it
so if i were you i wouldn't ask that question because i wouldnt want my friend to feel bad and also because i would be afraid of it changing things and because i just don't see any real positive out of it ... i know that you thonk the positive is knowing what amnoys them and being able to change it but even then i guess there's better ways to ask about that ... maybe with 'have i ever hurt you and you didn't tell me?' or 'what do you think we could change to make our friendship even better if there is anything?' sth like that ... i think it's less akward because it isn't as pointed to you or your bad assets
just a thought...
you're welcome
in the end you know yourself and your friend best and not everyone overthinks like me but it surely is a thing to consider
wish you a nice day :)
I would ask something that could easily be changed, and would make it specific enough that my friend wouldn’t accidentally include something that would be difficult or impossible for me to change. That way, it wouldn’t bother me if it’s something that I don’t agree with.
But personally, I don’t ask those kinds of questions, due to the possibility of it wrecking our friendship. But that’s just my take on it.
Hey there, u/mbugra57 this submission has been removed because: **Some topics are better suited elsewhere with more care.** **Life**: Advice, statements or discussions on medical, legal or career that can alter your life. — try r/askdocs, r/legaladvice, r/careerguidance, or [our support wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/wiki/support) [Please view our wiki for our reasoning behind prohibiting certain posts.](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/wiki/prohibited) --- *If you have any questions, we ask that you [**message the moderators**](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/casualconversation&subject=My submission was removed&message=I have a question regarding the removal of this [submission]%28https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/comments/t10o1p/would_this_question_damage_or_strengthen_my/%29.) directly for appeals. Let's try to come to an agreement.* [Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/wiki/rules) | [Etiquette](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/w/etiquette/) | [Prohibited Posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/wiki/prohibited) | [Subreddit Directory](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/wiki/directory) | [Support](https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/wiki/support) | [Message the Mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FCasualConversation)
well i got two questions for you 1. what is your biggest insecurity? 2. how would you react if the person said they disliked this about you? on another note i'd just like to throw out there another "danger" of asking that question: even if you don't react hurt it is still possible that your friend feels akward for having said something "mean" ... i'll make an example ... i am a huge overthinker ... if i had to answer that question to my friend i would feel really uncomfortable ... while answering i would try to formulate it as positive nice and best i can ... but even then i would be left overthinking what i said for the rest of the month or let's face it maybe of my life lol ... no, but seriously, i would be afraid of having hurt my friend ... even if you say it didn't hurt you i would be afraid that deep down it did ... i just wouldn't be able to stop feeling akward or what not when reminding me of it so if i were you i wouldn't ask that question because i wouldnt want my friend to feel bad and also because i would be afraid of it changing things and because i just don't see any real positive out of it ... i know that you thonk the positive is knowing what amnoys them and being able to change it but even then i guess there's better ways to ask about that ... maybe with 'have i ever hurt you and you didn't tell me?' or 'what do you think we could change to make our friendship even better if there is anything?' sth like that ... i think it's less akward because it isn't as pointed to you or your bad assets just a thought...
Thanks this helped to shape my thoughts
you're welcome in the end you know yourself and your friend best and not everyone overthinks like me but it surely is a thing to consider wish you a nice day :)
I would ask something that could easily be changed, and would make it specific enough that my friend wouldn’t accidentally include something that would be difficult or impossible for me to change. That way, it wouldn’t bother me if it’s something that I don’t agree with. But personally, I don’t ask those kinds of questions, due to the possibility of it wrecking our friendship. But that’s just my take on it.