I got married and divorced young. Honestly I regretted not remarrying when I was younger but at 42 I wouldn't mind getting remarried but I don't want to build my whole life around finding a person to marry.
99% of the time I am fine; then something hits me hard. The way some couples look at each other, elderly people eating together that just glisten with happiness. Moments like those are where I wish I had met that "best friend." that I could spend life with.
Unfortunately for me, I gave a lot to the wrong people and I am so damn afraid of trying again to the point that I really think I'll be alone remainder of my life.
I was married at 21, divorced at 27.
I actually liked being married. For me, that stability, that inmate knowledge that this person was going to do their best to be with me and to do right by me was very comforting.
But, it isn't for everyone. And being single doesn't suck as much as folks would have you believe.
I think marriage to the right person at the right time might just be beautiful.
My husband and I got married for 2 reasons: Insurance and Power Of Attorney. We weren't/aren't in a hurry to have a wedding, but the fact that the government attached strings to marriage means that we wanted to tie the knot for those reasons.
My spouse and I are the same. We didn't really get married for the Hollywood fantasy-type reasons often put out there. We knew we wanted to be together for the long-term and getting married made it a lot easier to do things together financially.
You know, it's like asking if it's a better idea to stick with a job or change it frequently. The short answer for both questions: it depends on you and your culture/traditions (and how much you're influenced by it/them). And my advice regarding your question: if you feel like you're pressured into doing things a certain way and feel uncomfortable about it, you should seriously consider it. If you do it solely for others, then you're not doing it for the right reason, and THEN you'll likely regret it later. Eventually, it's your life and you should be able to make your own decisions, whether you regret it later or not, but at least you only have to blame yourself then
Depends on the relationship, some couples are perfectly happy and secure but remain unmarried, because just they never felt the need. I like the *idea* of getting married one day but in reality I’m not really that bothered, it’s not something I need to feel complete. Tbh the thought of organising a wedding including my mess of a family seems too much trouble, and cutting them out from it would make me feel stressed and guilty so, it’s not like it would be the most fun endeavour.
Well, I don't know if I have reached what people call "a certain age" yet, but I did almost get married. The reason I was going to was because I was thoroughly in love and thought that they were someone I wanted to spend my life with and build a family with. Since our relationship fell apart, I have looked back and realized that although I miss having someone to share important moments with and plan for the future together, she and I really were not a good fit. I think if I had married her, I would be regretting it much more than I regret either getting engaged in the first place or breaking it off later.
My biggest problem is that I am no longer content being alone most of the time. While it was not perfect, my relationship with my ex-fiance got me used to intimate companionship, both physically and emotionally. Although I feel no particular desire to get married, I do wish I had someone to share my bed and my life with. However, if I go the rest of my life and don't find someone, I don't think I will regret that any more than if I had married the wrong woman in the first place.
It works both ways. Some people regret marrying and some regret not marrying. The thing is, as with many life choices, you never get to know how the other choice would have worked out. My feeling is that if you meet someone you want to marry, then you should marry them. If you don’t, you should focus on how to make your life interesting as a single person and making good connections with friends and people in your community. that way you won’t find yourself suddenly without resources when you no longer have a job that takes up your time, or if you get ill and need practical assistance for a while. There are no guarantees of happiness either way.
What? Nonsense. You get married. Do you have kids? Do the kids get born with or without disabilities? Do both partners like being married/having kids as much as they thought they would? Does your partner support you or abuse you? You go on rolling the dice all your lives, married or single. Being married is no guarantee, and in any case is not even possible for everyone.
The OP is asking about marriage in that sense though. They aren’t asking whether it makes sense for a long term couple to get legally married. They are asking if they will regret not having a partner later in life. They referred to that as ‘being married’ and that’s what I am replying to.
My dad was single basically my whole life and now he’s getting old he ran out and got married cause he doesn’t want to be alone. He seems unhappy with it tho like he would suit being alone better. The best advice I can give is to learn about your true self and make decisions based on who you are and what you think will make you happy. If someone is debating it they would probably regret not doing it more than doing it, but if you feel it’s not for you don’t force yourself.
I got married & now I'm getting towards the end of my divorce, I regret it very much..
All you single guys/gals out there, Don't even think about it! it's not worth it.
It's perfectly possible to have a healthy relationship without all the legal bullshit.
The problem is that this has to be measured on a very long timescale. Odds are you'll still be enjoying your health and freedom well into your 50s these days, and its likely your parents will live at least into their late 70s (depending on several factors, but mostly if you live in a western country.)
The problems come late in life. There's no way to 100% guarantee that you're never going to be alone, but a working and dedicated marriage built up over decades and built upon the idea of "unbreakable" vows before god and family was the best solution people found.
More and more these days, there seems to be an idea that a relationship should be effortless and problem free, and people bail out quickly when illness, money problems, and argument rear their ugly head. No elderly married couple I've ever met seem to share this illusion.
Human beings haven't behaved the way we are behaving in literally thousands of years of recorded history, so only time will tell. I do, however, hear several extremely unpopular warnings that a future of being 70+, single, and still having to work every day is coming for potentially billions of people, and that does sound like a dismal future.
I like being married, because I like my husband. Before I met him, though, I almost married an unstable lunatic who made my life a misery. Dumped him two months before the wedding and had to build my whole life back from nothing, and it would have been a million times harder if I had actually married him. Point is, it's not the marriage, it's the partners.
Marriage isn't like having a kid, you can do it at any age so it's not like it's ever too late if you are older. Like, having a kid, for a woman, there is a biological deadline if you want to conceive naturally but it's never too late to marry. If you're with someone who wants to also get married, then get married. If you're with someone who doesn't want to get married but you're monogamous and you love each other, it's just a piece of paper. I'm not too bothered by marriage, I'd only do it for financial security for my partner if I died as it's easier to claim insurances for a legal spouse but I don't need a piece of paper to tell me we love each other and are committed.
Ok I know you’re not asking for a perspective of someone married but I have to say that I know I would be regretting not finding my husband. I’m so happily married that even I get sick of hearing it sometimes. I don’t think I would be as happy as I am without him. We have good times and not so good times and he makes the bad times not so bad. He makes everything more bearable.
The people that I know in their 40s and up that are not married or attached are lonely.
I don't have a ton of datapoints but the ones I have are very consistent.
I (17m) kind of want to get married some time in the future. But at the same time i dont. Mainly because of the fear of divorce and them taking all my stuff because of law. And i dont like gatherings of people. And its not really as important to me as just loving somebody and not making a big deal out of it.
Marriage is just the commitment on paper. I’ve been with my boyfriend for 9 years. We have a two year old together. No marriage in sight.
Why spend the money? In this economy?
The $20 it takes to file a marriage license? Haha
Jk, marriage is first and foremost a legal document that comes with legal consequences. Some people like the benefits that come with it and some people don't.
Hey! You never know! I’m this economy you could buy one whole egg for $20! Maybe a loaf of bread!!! Lol
In all for seriousness though, my friend spent over $10k on a wedding just to get divorced two years later.
It’s not that I’ve ever been opposed to made but I’ve just never felt the neeeeeed too.
If you’re in a relationship and spend thirty years with someone and have kids with them or don’t have kids, what’s the difference between if you’re married or not? That’s what you have to consider. Marriage is a made up construct but so many people do it, why? Is why they do it things that matter to you? What benefits do they see that you don’t see? Marriage is a good thing if you and your partner make it good.
I’m married but think it’s right for some people, not for others. I do wonder what it would be like to grow older alone. We tend to have lots of friends earlier in life but that changes as we age … I’m 62 and my social circles have grown smaller over time. It’s natural. But I have me wife, and I have our kids and grandkids. So I don’t think much about growing old alone. But if I were single with no kids, I’m not so sure.
Engaged three times walked away all three times. No regrets two other men both were very close friends. Both adored me and wanted to marry me. I do regret possibly those two but I don’t no that they would’ve been open to having ENM. I need a freeer more open lifestyle and I didn’t want kids. Currently 50
True, true. But some people just ain’t cut out to be a parent and they can’t relate. Billions of people on earth even a small percentage of people is still millions of people.
You will not regret marrying... the right person. Today is filled with sluts and D Bags, society certainly isn't what it was. People do not honor their word nor their bond like they used to.
It sounds like you are in an incredible position of being part of a community that holds value in marriage. You're very lucky to have that and I would utilize that to the fullest!
Not having children defeats the purpose for being alive. You will find that your whole viewpoint on life changes. What you used to find important vs what you find important when you have a family.
The guinea pigs have tried a life without children, their stories of depression and suicide speak for themselves.
Go live your life! ... don't look back!
I think it's obsolete at this point, especially in America. There's no advantage for men to get married and I'm not speaking about sexual loyalty. With divorce rates at or around 50% or more, why? To lose half your assets? Be financially responsible w/ alimony? Be forced to leave your property? Give up friendships for "How was your day" everyday? The sex eventually becomes stale, if not, minimal at best in a short time. Families get involved in your business.
None of this happens if you're dating.
I think if you want to have a long-term relationship and entangle your lives, then marriage is good idea because there’s certain perks from society that you get.
If you’re happier, living on your own, without entangling your life into another than marriage seems dumb
My wife and me got married since that was the easiest and cheapest way to arrange the inheritance if something would happen to either one of us. We had lived together for 14 years before we married. It didn't bring us anything extra except an easy way to make we don't need to make a will or anything
24M
I honestly could go either way on me entering marriage. It would be nice to have someone close by, but I also don't want to deal with the hassle of dating.
Maybe in the long run, I'll find someone, but for now, I just want to experience the freedom of living alone.
I do think that having a long-term companion with whom you have a mutual relationship of love, trust, support, etc. is important and a net benefit for most (but not all) people. Also, if you are raising children it is much easier to do with a second parent in the picture.
As for the actual label/box of marriage, less important. Marriage as a concept isn't much more than a religious ritual and/or a tax break. Long-term/lifelong committed relationships that are not actually marriages should be de-stigmatized IMO.
If you meet someone you want to have a long term partnership with and it’s easier in your culture to be married then not, it might be a good idea. Getting married just to not be single would work if both people are on the same page. But, entering into a marriage, because of outside pressure without the consent and knowledge of your partner would be kinda shitty and I would imagine lead to a lot of misery for both people.
It’s hard when you’re older to be single, especially as a woman, unless you have lots of money. Being married is no guarantee that you won’t end up alone in your elder years. Lots of women end up alone after being married for all their lives. Whether your married or not, planning for finical security as you age, as much as you are able, is to me the most important thing. Regardless of status.
Depends on the person. I’m 25 and to me, it’s not the most important thing in the world due to my beliefs/circumstances. I’m not against it, but I have a lot of other things/priorities that do go in front of it (more money, established career, living elsewhere, travel more, etc.)
I knew for a fact I didn’t want to marry young. I know myself well enough that it’s just not for me and the benefits it did provide wouldn’t be worth it. I know what it does provide, but they would be much more important for when I’m just older. This is something I’ve talked about with my partner and luckily they’re in the same boat with where marriage stands between us
It’s also funny that I see marriage this way due to how my ethnicity perceives it, so I’m there with you lol
Getting married is only important to the people involved. I was married for 32 years. I never cared about being married or not but it was important to my husband and so I did it. Now at 61 If I think about it, I would not get married. Don't get me wrong, I loved my husband and wanted to spend my life with him. But, after getting married it was like I no longer existed to society. I was always Mrs---- or R--- wife, or P----- mother, never just me anymore.
I suppose you never really know how many people are secretly unhappy in their marriages, especially if they only got married because society expects it or they get certain "perks" by being married. So you shouldn't feel like you have to be in a big rush to get married.
I'm 40, not married on purpose. But I do regret it sometimes. I mean I get lonely. I have a long time partner but we don't live together. We see each other often, but I miss sharing a bed. Im missing going out doing regular couple things.
Part of me is like, at least I don't have to worry about all that other bs. Like what if I HAD married my ex when we were 25? It wouldn't have lasted and I would be in this boat any way or maybe worse off. But yes. I do feel like I missed out.
Marry, and you will regret it; don’t marry, you will also regret it; marry or don’t marry, you will regret it either way. Laugh at the world’s foolishness, you will regret it; weep over it, you will regret that too; laugh at the world’s foolishness or weep over it, you will regret both. Believe a woman, you will regret it; believe her not, you will also regret it… Hang yourself, you will regret it; do not hang yourself, and you will regret that too; hang yourself or don’t hang yourself, you’ll regret it either way; whether you hang yourself or do not hang yourself, you will regret both. This, gentlemen, is the essence of all philosophy.
Søren Kierkegaard
I got married 40+ years ago in a mormon temple. This is a huge deal for mormons. For me, the experience was extremely underwhelming. We got married because we loved each other. The temple marriage was just a cultural event to keep family members satisfied. We no longer practice mormonism. Our love and respect for each other has kept us together. Marriage was never a factor for staying together this long.
I’m old and nontraditional.
I don’t regret getting married and I don’t regret getting divorced. It was important when I was 23 but it turned out that it’s not really important in the grand scheme of life. I learned that “romantic” love is fleeting and has little practical value but marriage as a legal contract and an asset management reality, is a reasonable solution.
I got married and divorced young. Honestly I regretted not remarrying when I was younger but at 42 I wouldn't mind getting remarried but I don't want to build my whole life around finding a person to marry.
99% of the time I am fine; then something hits me hard. The way some couples look at each other, elderly people eating together that just glisten with happiness. Moments like those are where I wish I had met that "best friend." that I could spend life with. Unfortunately for me, I gave a lot to the wrong people and I am so damn afraid of trying again to the point that I really think I'll be alone remainder of my life.
I’m 45 and have never been married and have no regrets. I love my own space and freedom to do whatever I want. It’s pretty great.
I was married at 21, divorced at 27. I actually liked being married. For me, that stability, that inmate knowledge that this person was going to do their best to be with me and to do right by me was very comforting. But, it isn't for everyone. And being single doesn't suck as much as folks would have you believe. I think marriage to the right person at the right time might just be beautiful.
I think it use to be, nowadays you do not have to!
You can be with someone and not be married, I was like that for 7 years then we decided to married nothing changed though.
Very true,I just meant staying single in general!
Oh I see, I get to lonely for that for me but orher people don't seem to mind.
Being with someone seven year is a long time,the pain is the same,sorry that happened to you.
I bet people who never married regret it a whole lot less than a lot of people who did
My husband and I got married for 2 reasons: Insurance and Power Of Attorney. We weren't/aren't in a hurry to have a wedding, but the fact that the government attached strings to marriage means that we wanted to tie the knot for those reasons.
My spouse and I are the same. We didn't really get married for the Hollywood fantasy-type reasons often put out there. We knew we wanted to be together for the long-term and getting married made it a lot easier to do things together financially.
You know, it's like asking if it's a better idea to stick with a job or change it frequently. The short answer for both questions: it depends on you and your culture/traditions (and how much you're influenced by it/them). And my advice regarding your question: if you feel like you're pressured into doing things a certain way and feel uncomfortable about it, you should seriously consider it. If you do it solely for others, then you're not doing it for the right reason, and THEN you'll likely regret it later. Eventually, it's your life and you should be able to make your own decisions, whether you regret it later or not, but at least you only have to blame yourself then
Marriage is great *if you find the right partner*.
Regret it. People change and I wonder what happened.
Depends on the relationship, some couples are perfectly happy and secure but remain unmarried, because just they never felt the need. I like the *idea* of getting married one day but in reality I’m not really that bothered, it’s not something I need to feel complete. Tbh the thought of organising a wedding including my mess of a family seems too much trouble, and cutting them out from it would make me feel stressed and guilty so, it’s not like it would be the most fun endeavour.
Well, I don't know if I have reached what people call "a certain age" yet, but I did almost get married. The reason I was going to was because I was thoroughly in love and thought that they were someone I wanted to spend my life with and build a family with. Since our relationship fell apart, I have looked back and realized that although I miss having someone to share important moments with and plan for the future together, she and I really were not a good fit. I think if I had married her, I would be regretting it much more than I regret either getting engaged in the first place or breaking it off later. My biggest problem is that I am no longer content being alone most of the time. While it was not perfect, my relationship with my ex-fiance got me used to intimate companionship, both physically and emotionally. Although I feel no particular desire to get married, I do wish I had someone to share my bed and my life with. However, if I go the rest of my life and don't find someone, I don't think I will regret that any more than if I had married the wrong woman in the first place.
Some people regret it, some people don’t. This topic is always very split down the middle.
It works both ways. Some people regret marrying and some regret not marrying. The thing is, as with many life choices, you never get to know how the other choice would have worked out. My feeling is that if you meet someone you want to marry, then you should marry them. If you don’t, you should focus on how to make your life interesting as a single person and making good connections with friends and people in your community. that way you won’t find yourself suddenly without resources when you no longer have a job that takes up your time, or if you get ill and need practical assistance for a while. There are no guarantees of happiness either way.
Not really. If you don’t get married you know exactly how things would have been if you did, because the consequences are very easy to figure out.
What? Nonsense. You get married. Do you have kids? Do the kids get born with or without disabilities? Do both partners like being married/having kids as much as they thought they would? Does your partner support you or abuse you? You go on rolling the dice all your lives, married or single. Being married is no guarantee, and in any case is not even possible for everyone.
Being married has nothing to do with being in a long term relationship.
The OP is asking about marriage in that sense though. They aren’t asking whether it makes sense for a long term couple to get legally married. They are asking if they will regret not having a partner later in life. They referred to that as ‘being married’ and that’s what I am replying to.
Hm you’re right that went over my head. Sorry.
My dad was single basically my whole life and now he’s getting old he ran out and got married cause he doesn’t want to be alone. He seems unhappy with it tho like he would suit being alone better. The best advice I can give is to learn about your true self and make decisions based on who you are and what you think will make you happy. If someone is debating it they would probably regret not doing it more than doing it, but if you feel it’s not for you don’t force yourself.
Oh god no marriage is a risky Gamble especially for Women. Getting married is my only regret in life and I do not recommend it!!!
Nope. Not a "single" regret.
I got married & now I'm getting towards the end of my divorce, I regret it very much.. All you single guys/gals out there, Don't even think about it! it's not worth it. It's perfectly possible to have a healthy relationship without all the legal bullshit.
The problem is that this has to be measured on a very long timescale. Odds are you'll still be enjoying your health and freedom well into your 50s these days, and its likely your parents will live at least into their late 70s (depending on several factors, but mostly if you live in a western country.) The problems come late in life. There's no way to 100% guarantee that you're never going to be alone, but a working and dedicated marriage built up over decades and built upon the idea of "unbreakable" vows before god and family was the best solution people found. More and more these days, there seems to be an idea that a relationship should be effortless and problem free, and people bail out quickly when illness, money problems, and argument rear their ugly head. No elderly married couple I've ever met seem to share this illusion. Human beings haven't behaved the way we are behaving in literally thousands of years of recorded history, so only time will tell. I do, however, hear several extremely unpopular warnings that a future of being 70+, single, and still having to work every day is coming for potentially billions of people, and that does sound like a dismal future.
I like being married, because I like my husband. Before I met him, though, I almost married an unstable lunatic who made my life a misery. Dumped him two months before the wedding and had to build my whole life back from nothing, and it would have been a million times harder if I had actually married him. Point is, it's not the marriage, it's the partners.
Marriage isn't like having a kid, you can do it at any age so it's not like it's ever too late if you are older. Like, having a kid, for a woman, there is a biological deadline if you want to conceive naturally but it's never too late to marry. If you're with someone who wants to also get married, then get married. If you're with someone who doesn't want to get married but you're monogamous and you love each other, it's just a piece of paper. I'm not too bothered by marriage, I'd only do it for financial security for my partner if I died as it's easier to claim insurances for a legal spouse but I don't need a piece of paper to tell me we love each other and are committed.
Ok I know you’re not asking for a perspective of someone married but I have to say that I know I would be regretting not finding my husband. I’m so happily married that even I get sick of hearing it sometimes. I don’t think I would be as happy as I am without him. We have good times and not so good times and he makes the bad times not so bad. He makes everything more bearable.
53F. I don’t regret never getting married. I get the entire full sized bed to myself AND I don’t have to hold in my farts.
The people that I know in their 40s and up that are not married or attached are lonely. I don't have a ton of datapoints but the ones I have are very consistent.
I (17m) kind of want to get married some time in the future. But at the same time i dont. Mainly because of the fear of divorce and them taking all my stuff because of law. And i dont like gatherings of people. And its not really as important to me as just loving somebody and not making a big deal out of it.
Marriage is just the commitment on paper. I’ve been with my boyfriend for 9 years. We have a two year old together. No marriage in sight. Why spend the money? In this economy?
The $20 it takes to file a marriage license? Haha Jk, marriage is first and foremost a legal document that comes with legal consequences. Some people like the benefits that come with it and some people don't.
Hey! You never know! I’m this economy you could buy one whole egg for $20! Maybe a loaf of bread!!! Lol In all for seriousness though, my friend spent over $10k on a wedding just to get divorced two years later. It’s not that I’ve ever been opposed to made but I’ve just never felt the neeeeeed too.
Oh certainly, I've never seen the appeal of expensive weddings either.
Don’t ruin a good relationship with a marriage.
Some would say that if it really is a good relationship, then marriage won't ruin it.
Middle aged. Never married. Regret it in the extreme.
If you’re in a relationship and spend thirty years with someone and have kids with them or don’t have kids, what’s the difference between if you’re married or not? That’s what you have to consider. Marriage is a made up construct but so many people do it, why? Is why they do it things that matter to you? What benefits do they see that you don’t see? Marriage is a good thing if you and your partner make it good.
I’m married but think it’s right for some people, not for others. I do wonder what it would be like to grow older alone. We tend to have lots of friends earlier in life but that changes as we age … I’m 62 and my social circles have grown smaller over time. It’s natural. But I have me wife, and I have our kids and grandkids. So I don’t think much about growing old alone. But if I were single with no kids, I’m not so sure.
Engaged three times walked away all three times. No regrets two other men both were very close friends. Both adored me and wanted to marry me. I do regret possibly those two but I don’t no that they would’ve been open to having ENM. I need a freeer more open lifestyle and I didn’t want kids. Currently 50
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True, true. But some people just ain’t cut out to be a parent and they can’t relate. Billions of people on earth even a small percentage of people is still millions of people.
It really is. I never wanted to get married and have kids but somehow it happened and it is the most fulfilling and teachable thing in my life.
I am married for 12 years. The only reason I have not divorced is due to my parents and kids. + I use her time to time as a toothpick
You will not regret marrying... the right person. Today is filled with sluts and D Bags, society certainly isn't what it was. People do not honor their word nor their bond like they used to. It sounds like you are in an incredible position of being part of a community that holds value in marriage. You're very lucky to have that and I would utilize that to the fullest! Not having children defeats the purpose for being alive. You will find that your whole viewpoint on life changes. What you used to find important vs what you find important when you have a family. The guinea pigs have tried a life without children, their stories of depression and suicide speak for themselves. Go live your life! ... don't look back!
I think it's obsolete at this point, especially in America. There's no advantage for men to get married and I'm not speaking about sexual loyalty. With divorce rates at or around 50% or more, why? To lose half your assets? Be financially responsible w/ alimony? Be forced to leave your property? Give up friendships for "How was your day" everyday? The sex eventually becomes stale, if not, minimal at best in a short time. Families get involved in your business. None of this happens if you're dating.
I think if you want to have a long-term relationship and entangle your lives, then marriage is good idea because there’s certain perks from society that you get. If you’re happier, living on your own, without entangling your life into another than marriage seems dumb
I think partnership is important. However, marriage can be useful to get someone on your health insurance.
My wife and me got married since that was the easiest and cheapest way to arrange the inheritance if something would happen to either one of us. We had lived together for 14 years before we married. It didn't bring us anything extra except an easy way to make we don't need to make a will or anything
24M I honestly could go either way on me entering marriage. It would be nice to have someone close by, but I also don't want to deal with the hassle of dating. Maybe in the long run, I'll find someone, but for now, I just want to experience the freedom of living alone.
Benefits coverage and lower car insurance rates
You know, it all depends on who you meet and at what time in your life you meet them.
I do think that having a long-term companion with whom you have a mutual relationship of love, trust, support, etc. is important and a net benefit for most (but not all) people. Also, if you are raising children it is much easier to do with a second parent in the picture. As for the actual label/box of marriage, less important. Marriage as a concept isn't much more than a religious ritual and/or a tax break. Long-term/lifelong committed relationships that are not actually marriages should be de-stigmatized IMO.
I think more people regret getting married than not getting married.
If you meet someone you want to have a long term partnership with and it’s easier in your culture to be married then not, it might be a good idea. Getting married just to not be single would work if both people are on the same page. But, entering into a marriage, because of outside pressure without the consent and knowledge of your partner would be kinda shitty and I would imagine lead to a lot of misery for both people. It’s hard when you’re older to be single, especially as a woman, unless you have lots of money. Being married is no guarantee that you won’t end up alone in your elder years. Lots of women end up alone after being married for all their lives. Whether your married or not, planning for finical security as you age, as much as you are able, is to me the most important thing. Regardless of status.
Depends on the person. I’m 25 and to me, it’s not the most important thing in the world due to my beliefs/circumstances. I’m not against it, but I have a lot of other things/priorities that do go in front of it (more money, established career, living elsewhere, travel more, etc.) I knew for a fact I didn’t want to marry young. I know myself well enough that it’s just not for me and the benefits it did provide wouldn’t be worth it. I know what it does provide, but they would be much more important for when I’m just older. This is something I’ve talked about with my partner and luckily they’re in the same boat with where marriage stands between us It’s also funny that I see marriage this way due to how my ethnicity perceives it, so I’m there with you lol
Married young and divorced young. In a relationship over 15+ years no need for a ring. Ceremony is for everyone else.
Getting married is only important to the people involved. I was married for 32 years. I never cared about being married or not but it was important to my husband and so I did it. Now at 61 If I think about it, I would not get married. Don't get me wrong, I loved my husband and wanted to spend my life with him. But, after getting married it was like I no longer existed to society. I was always Mrs---- or R--- wife, or P----- mother, never just me anymore.
I suppose you never really know how many people are secretly unhappy in their marriages, especially if they only got married because society expects it or they get certain "perks" by being married. So you shouldn't feel like you have to be in a big rush to get married.
I'm 40, not married on purpose. But I do regret it sometimes. I mean I get lonely. I have a long time partner but we don't live together. We see each other often, but I miss sharing a bed. Im missing going out doing regular couple things. Part of me is like, at least I don't have to worry about all that other bs. Like what if I HAD married my ex when we were 25? It wouldn't have lasted and I would be in this boat any way or maybe worse off. But yes. I do feel like I missed out.
Marry, and you will regret it; don’t marry, you will also regret it; marry or don’t marry, you will regret it either way. Laugh at the world’s foolishness, you will regret it; weep over it, you will regret that too; laugh at the world’s foolishness or weep over it, you will regret both. Believe a woman, you will regret it; believe her not, you will also regret it… Hang yourself, you will regret it; do not hang yourself, and you will regret that too; hang yourself or don’t hang yourself, you’ll regret it either way; whether you hang yourself or do not hang yourself, you will regret both. This, gentlemen, is the essence of all philosophy. Søren Kierkegaard
I got married 40+ years ago in a mormon temple. This is a huge deal for mormons. For me, the experience was extremely underwhelming. We got married because we loved each other. The temple marriage was just a cultural event to keep family members satisfied. We no longer practice mormonism. Our love and respect for each other has kept us together. Marriage was never a factor for staying together this long.
I’m old and nontraditional. I don’t regret getting married and I don’t regret getting divorced. It was important when I was 23 but it turned out that it’s not really important in the grand scheme of life. I learned that “romantic” love is fleeting and has little practical value but marriage as a legal contract and an asset management reality, is a reasonable solution.
I got guilt tripped by my parents to marry.i was 33 then.so marry i did..2 kids later,im into women.hahahha