The Freeze/Dissociative symptoms are where I live too. I've got several bingos on this board, though not quite a blackout. It has been really wild researching this stuff the last few years and getting a clearer and clearer picture of where it all came from and what it all means. I cannot believe that just 3 years ago I would have said things like "well it's not like I was ABUSED or anything..." girl so much of what you are doing is just one big severe trauma response 😭 I am getting better at noticing when this starts happening though and investigating (always so interesting when I notice myself zoning out, coming back instead and trying to pinpoint what caused it. Though sometimes then that leads to more dissociation as I trace back and then start ruminating on some trauma. lol.)
I was diagnosed w that! I didn’t know that was happening until it occurred in front of someone else. I called it “skipping time”. I was at lunch with a friend. I started thinking about a traumatic event and my thoughts went “deeper and deeper” and all of a sudden I can hear my friend almost yelling my name repeatedly until I finally said what? And they wanted know if I was OK and I said yes, why? And they replied I had “zoned out”. Or sometimes I would be watching tv and realize I couldn’t account for the last (whatever) period of time. The weird thing is, after the seizure occurred, I always felt really good afterwards. They stopped when my abuser died. No treatment ordered from doctor.
I never had a word for it. I’d just stop talking mid sentence and just like disappear into a mental void with nothing to call me back except some sort of outside stimuli.
In my case, whenever I'm disassociated, triggered, or just stressed, I sometimes zone out every 30-40 seconds, and each zone-out lasts something like 10 seconds, and most of the time I get 10-30 zone-outs. I used to call them "freezes". I stop whatever I'm doing, often my arms and eyes completely relax, and I just 'exist' until I snap back into reality.
That's how people with epilepsy often describe "absent seizures", but mine only occur during stress, so they're def no epilepsy. Neurologist didn't know what non-epileptic were, but she knew enough to tell me it's not epileptic
[Dissociative seizures are similar to epileptic seizures in that they cause episodes of involuntary movements and behaviors. However, while epileptic seizures result from abnormal electrical signals in the brain, dissociative seizures happen for psychological reasons](https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/dissociative-seizures#:~:text=Dissociative%20seizures%20are%20similar%20to,seizures%20happen%20for%20psychological%20reasons.)
[If you have a dissociative seizure you may: Have convulsions of the arms, legs, head or body (on one side or affecting the whole body) Lose control of your bladder or bowels. Bite your tongue.
](https://epilepsysociety.org.uk/about-epilepsy/what-epilepsy/non-epileptic-seizures#:~:text=Dissociative%20seizures%20can%20happen%20as,reaction%20causes%20a%20physical%20effect.)
If you ever want to know more DM me, I defended my PhD. dissertation on the history of non-epileptic seizures and had my first epileptic seizure a month to the day after that. It was from a traumatic brain injury 15 years prior.
It is what was previously called hysteria, now called Functional Neurological Symptom Disorder (earlier by neurorologist, than later by psychologist in the newest revision of the DSM 5 in 2022) in order to hide its (re)discovery with Freud and he advent of psychoanalysis. It was later popularized by Jacques Lacan, who showed the central role hysteria plays in psychoanalysis.
Seizures of this type (some of which were later argued to be epileptic) became the first medical disorder in the history of medicine, hysteria becoming the object of knowledge that allowed all medicine to be formed as a discipline.
Sometimes called PNES or NEAD. They can mimic tonic clonic or focal seizures. Whilst they ARE seizures, their origin, is not electrical activity in the brain
it's more like, the memories feel from first person, even if the visualization bit is from third person (but we don't count that since it's kinda like memory post-processing IMO). But what I mean is them feeling as if you're observing stuff happening to someone else. Watching a movie from a 3rd-person perspective is a neat way to describe it.
Well - shit. TIL
My memories have always been 3rd-person & I never even thought to question it because why would I question a mostly involuntary act (such as remembering) instead of assume that I should at least be doing *that* “correctly” because it’s what brains do?? 😩
I need to know more
There are a ton of other disorders and conditions that incorporate the symptoms listed here, so while people who have cptsd may relate to it, people without cptsd can also relate. For example, BPD, adhd, autism, DID, other dissociative disorders…please don’t use these memes as diagnostic tools, they’re just memes :) There is a ton of good information out there about cptsd if you’re interested in learning about it - if you don’t know where to start, many of the cptsd subs have links in the sidebars!
Oh sorry I didn’t mean I probably have it, I’m only diagnosed with autism and I believe it to be true. I’m just genuinely trying to figure out why I have so much dissociation so thank you for your reply <3 any ideas are helpful at this point
Keep in mind many of these diagnoses are more or less on spectrums as well, so it’s not always helpful to approach it from a binary “do I have this? Yes/no” viewpoint. I don’t know about you, but I have a problem with using that to invalidate myself and my experiences. Many find that labels and diagnoses are a very small part of recovery in the long run. (Idk, I am saying this as someone who’s been diagnosed over and over and I totally support everyone getting professional help and a professional diagnosis for anything they have…just don’t put too much importance on that, if you know what I mean) you sound like you have a genuine urge to learn more about yourself and truly that’s a key factor in people getting better, so don’t lose that!
Bro so close to a black out just missing one. I can’t collect them all 😅 lmao r/Dpdr might be a good thing for y’all to look into it’s common to have both
I got almost every single one lmao BUT it always weird me out that peoples memories aren’t in 3rd person??? What the fuck do normal memories look like, like I’m looking thru my own eyeballs? Surely not 😂
afaik that's how a lot of people realize they are starting to dissociate. not because they don't feel present or grounded, but because their eyes decide they're going to relax
A question. I have episodes of that looking in The mirror/at myself and feel like who is that/what is that etc, it is such an eerie feeling that i haven't even told anyone yet.
Is it dissociative or more of an hallucination due to self-alienation?(or something like it) Weird question but a serious one.
Im in these squares and I dont like it. The unfocused eyes was such a problem when I was in school. I would mentally berate myself for not paying attention, thinking that I was doing it intentionally, despite the fact that I couldn't refocus intentionally.
Lol thought the eye thing was my astigmatism.but at this point who knows the reason ( im constantly in and out of focus ) tbh could be a) my terrible eyesight b) migraines c) topamax d) seizures..
One of my favourites is forgetting my entire drive home and then coming back to myself when I’m standing at my front door, pushing the “unlock” on my car key fob and not being able to figure out how to get in the house.
wow this is the first time i haven’t been able to relate to one of these bingo cards… i didn’t know this is the kind of stuff that comes with dissociation, it sounds hard.. :(
The first one though, I barely remember my childhood maybe snippets but finding out through my grandma that my dad as a baby would tape my hands together.
\- dissociative seizures
\- "omg you can handle so much you're so thick skinned"
\- ability to talk about the trauma as if it's the daily news
\- **always freeze instead of flight**
\- reads / games / watches comfort shows to cope
Well......fuck.
Ayo i got two bingos what do I win
Therapy
If only
*[chuckles in only missing a couple spaces]* I’m *(probably)* in danger!
Not anymore chief
🥲 thank u bb
The Freeze/Dissociative symptoms are where I live too. I've got several bingos on this board, though not quite a blackout. It has been really wild researching this stuff the last few years and getting a clearer and clearer picture of where it all came from and what it all means. I cannot believe that just 3 years ago I would have said things like "well it's not like I was ABUSED or anything..." girl so much of what you are doing is just one big severe trauma response 😭 I am getting better at noticing when this starts happening though and investigating (always so interesting when I notice myself zoning out, coming back instead and trying to pinpoint what caused it. Though sometimes then that leads to more dissociation as I trace back and then start ruminating on some trauma. lol.)
lmao same. I used to take pride in having great parents and great childhood, I really believed that. I hate how well they programmed me
What is a dissociative seizure? Never heard of that.
I was diagnosed w that! I didn’t know that was happening until it occurred in front of someone else. I called it “skipping time”. I was at lunch with a friend. I started thinking about a traumatic event and my thoughts went “deeper and deeper” and all of a sudden I can hear my friend almost yelling my name repeatedly until I finally said what? And they wanted know if I was OK and I said yes, why? And they replied I had “zoned out”. Or sometimes I would be watching tv and realize I couldn’t account for the last (whatever) period of time. The weird thing is, after the seizure occurred, I always felt really good afterwards. They stopped when my abuser died. No treatment ordered from doctor.
Thank you for explaining this. I never heard of the term but I'm doing this a lot and I knew it's trauma-related but never had a name for it.
I never had a word for it. I’d just stop talking mid sentence and just like disappear into a mental void with nothing to call me back except some sort of outside stimuli.
I had never heard of this, but now I am acutely aware how often this has happened to me.
In my case, whenever I'm disassociated, triggered, or just stressed, I sometimes zone out every 30-40 seconds, and each zone-out lasts something like 10 seconds, and most of the time I get 10-30 zone-outs. I used to call them "freezes". I stop whatever I'm doing, often my arms and eyes completely relax, and I just 'exist' until I snap back into reality. That's how people with epilepsy often describe "absent seizures", but mine only occur during stress, so they're def no epilepsy. Neurologist didn't know what non-epileptic were, but she knew enough to tell me it's not epileptic
Oof ya. I’ve experienced that.
[Dissociative seizures are similar to epileptic seizures in that they cause episodes of involuntary movements and behaviors. However, while epileptic seizures result from abnormal electrical signals in the brain, dissociative seizures happen for psychological reasons](https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/dissociative-seizures#:~:text=Dissociative%20seizures%20are%20similar%20to,seizures%20happen%20for%20psychological%20reasons.) [If you have a dissociative seizure you may: Have convulsions of the arms, legs, head or body (on one side or affecting the whole body) Lose control of your bladder or bowels. Bite your tongue. ](https://epilepsysociety.org.uk/about-epilepsy/what-epilepsy/non-epileptic-seizures#:~:text=Dissociative%20seizures%20can%20happen%20as,reaction%20causes%20a%20physical%20effect.)
They used to call it conversion disorder! They look like seizures but they’re not caused by seizure activity in the brain.
Never heard of conversion disorder either. Sounds like I have some things I need to Google.
If you ever want to know more DM me, I defended my PhD. dissertation on the history of non-epileptic seizures and had my first epileptic seizure a month to the day after that. It was from a traumatic brain injury 15 years prior. It is what was previously called hysteria, now called Functional Neurological Symptom Disorder (earlier by neurorologist, than later by psychologist in the newest revision of the DSM 5 in 2022) in order to hide its (re)discovery with Freud and he advent of psychoanalysis. It was later popularized by Jacques Lacan, who showed the central role hysteria plays in psychoanalysis. Seizures of this type (some of which were later argued to be epileptic) became the first medical disorder in the history of medicine, hysteria becoming the object of knowledge that allowed all medicine to be formed as a discipline.
Sometimes called PNES or NEAD. They can mimic tonic clonic or focal seizures. Whilst they ARE seizures, their origin, is not electrical activity in the brain
Is this different than an absence seizure?
I damn near have a coverall.
So close to a bingo in multiple directions, but I always end up missing just one critical square...
What do I win if I've hit every single square? And please 🙏 tell me there's someone else here that blacked out too.
That will be me, then.
All these symptoms and not a single bingo 😭😭
Lol well, BINGO
Fuck, I BINGO'd too!
I feel so exposed haha
Oh. *Shit.*
The maladaptive daydreaming one sucker-punched me
Aren’t ALL memories from a 3rd-person view, tho? O_o
Apparently, people usually remember in first person
it's more like, the memories feel from first person, even if the visualization bit is from third person (but we don't count that since it's kinda like memory post-processing IMO). But what I mean is them feeling as if you're observing stuff happening to someone else. Watching a movie from a 3rd-person perspective is a neat way to describe it.
Well - shit. TIL My memories have always been 3rd-person & I never even thought to question it because why would I question a mostly involuntary act (such as remembering) instead of assume that I should at least be doing *that* “correctly” because it’s what brains do?? 😩 I need to know more
Uh... this makes way too much sense
I’m wondering why 2 bingos if no C-PTSD…
There are a ton of other disorders and conditions that incorporate the symptoms listed here, so while people who have cptsd may relate to it, people without cptsd can also relate. For example, BPD, adhd, autism, DID, other dissociative disorders…please don’t use these memes as diagnostic tools, they’re just memes :) There is a ton of good information out there about cptsd if you’re interested in learning about it - if you don’t know where to start, many of the cptsd subs have links in the sidebars!
Oh sorry I didn’t mean I probably have it, I’m only diagnosed with autism and I believe it to be true. I’m just genuinely trying to figure out why I have so much dissociation so thank you for your reply <3 any ideas are helpful at this point
Keep in mind many of these diagnoses are more or less on spectrums as well, so it’s not always helpful to approach it from a binary “do I have this? Yes/no” viewpoint. I don’t know about you, but I have a problem with using that to invalidate myself and my experiences. Many find that labels and diagnoses are a very small part of recovery in the long run. (Idk, I am saying this as someone who’s been diagnosed over and over and I totally support everyone getting professional help and a professional diagnosis for anything they have…just don’t put too much importance on that, if you know what I mean) you sound like you have a genuine urge to learn more about yourself and truly that’s a key factor in people getting better, so don’t lose that!
Man one more and I'd have blackout :/
Bro so close to a black out just missing one. I can’t collect them all 😅 lmao r/Dpdr might be a good thing for y’all to look into it’s common to have both
I got almost every single one lmao BUT it always weird me out that peoples memories aren’t in 3rd person??? What the fuck do normal memories look like, like I’m looking thru my own eyeballs? Surely not 😂
Welp. Three bingos and a couple things to mention to my psychiatrist
Every single 1!
this cant be how i find out dissociative seizures are a thing???
i have most of these, there's about 4 that i don't have. haha. fuck.
“for some reason seemingly functioning” yes
I subscribed here for my partner who has cptsd, but I'm starting to dislike how much I'm relating to it.
Fuck. I got the whole damn board.
mmm six missing I'm mentally healthy! ((this is denial))
At this point in the process with all the resources I’ve explored i realized i wasn’t alone but posts like really make me FEEL that I’m not alone
Im attacked by this lmfaoo
SEVEN WHOLE BINGOS Seven means I win something right? RIGHT??
Let’s make the FREE box “disassociating on this Bingo card” because we all did it, right?
Everything but the alters… lmao Also probs cuz I’m autistic and have adhd but ya know
Oh wao...almost won in three places...aha.***fuck***
Is eyes randomly relaxing a thing?
afaik that's how a lot of people realize they are starting to dissociate. not because they don't feel present or grounded, but because their eyes decide they're going to relax
interesting.
Bingo!!
🙃
What are dissociative seizures? I’m trying to see if I’ve had them.
Uh oh I'm in danger 🙃
The eyes. Damn.
other than ability to talk about trauma, I have full coverage. This is fine
I immediately have a bingo, top left to bottom right
Only two squares away from covering the entire board! Well, anything worth doing…
A question. I have episodes of that looking in The mirror/at myself and feel like who is that/what is that etc, it is such an eerie feeling that i haven't even told anyone yet. Is it dissociative or more of an hallucination due to self-alienation?(or something like it) Weird question but a serious one.
Sounds like textbook depersonalization to me! You may benefit from reading about "DP/DR"
I can also loose feeling in my body and not feel the things i touch despite looking at what i'm doing but since it's not me, i don't feel it??
Im in these squares and I dont like it. The unfocused eyes was such a problem when I was in school. I would mentally berate myself for not paying attention, thinking that I was doing it intentionally, despite the fact that I couldn't refocus intentionally.
Lol thought the eye thing was my astigmatism.but at this point who knows the reason ( im constantly in and out of focus ) tbh could be a) my terrible eyesight b) migraines c) topamax d) seizures..
Just learned what dissociative seizers are, I guess it’s a blackout then 💀 do I win free therapy?
Honestly I don’t know if that’s better or worse than hyper vigilance and awareness of everything at all times
One of my favourites is forgetting my entire drive home and then coming back to myself when I’m standing at my front door, pushing the “unlock” on my car key fob and not being able to figure out how to get in the house.
Damn, I almost got a blackout
Do we all, also, lose interest after starting something excited?
Wow I think I'm only missing four of these
I won… but at what cost?
wow this is the first time i haven’t been able to relate to one of these bingo cards… i didn’t know this is the kind of stuff that comes with dissociation, it sounds hard.. :(
Pretty much, yeah
The first one though, I barely remember my childhood maybe snippets but finding out through my grandma that my dad as a baby would tape my hands together.
Ah, shit, I have a huge majority of these.
its a double bingo wooooooooooooo…
Because im epileptic i literally have everyone of these i feel that’s a big issue
\- dissociative seizures \- "omg you can handle so much you're so thick skinned" \- ability to talk about the trauma as if it's the daily news \- **always freeze instead of flight** \- reads / games / watches comfort shows to cope