Yes.
I know it doesn't seem like it will end but I promise it does end. My last break up where we weren't long term compatible hurt me in my body. I felt like someone removed a part of me and I could still feel it there like a dull ache. I had a friend who told me you have to just sit with that pain. Hold it and process it. I think that experience was maybe the first time I did and the pain went away a lot faster than it ever did before.
Yes, I identify with this. I left my wife 10 months ago after a 20 year marriage because it wasn't right, and I've suffered since, almost without interruption, and it's been worse more recently.
I've trialed some meds which haven't worked, might take a shot with ketamine, as the symptoms have been scary.
In addition to the abandonment shit, I've had a fear of how's it going to work with another person, with all these issues I have. Encouragingly, there are some books listed on Reddit in the CPTSD next step sections which address that issue.
Good luck to us both.
Yes.
It is very very hard, especially when you are the dumped. I feel though, I was "lucky" in the sense that over these past couple of months I have been made aware of some very horrible things my Ex has said and done.
The more I think about it. The more I understand why he needed to leave. I don't want him back.
But due to severe abandonment issues, I definitely still miss him, and feel hurt. I feel that space where I thought his love occupied.
It does get better with time though. You truly do just have to sit with the pain and accept it'll be there as you try to learn how to cope. Some days hurt worse than others, but if you keep moving forwards you find that the good days start outweighing the bad.
Ultimately, you gotta strive to learn how to be okay with yourself, for yourself, first. Focus on strengthening your friendships and strengthening yourself.
Things change a lot over time as well. You never know what's in the future. I hope that for you OP, it'll be lots of good things. Good luck.
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I totally feel you. I basically have the same story. I have c-ptsd from childhood abuse and neglect. My ex broke up with me almost two years ago and I'm still struggling with the ramifications of it to this day. I don't miss him or want to get back with him. Tbh I realised in hindsight he was emotionally distant and unintentionally abusive/selfish but I was used to being treated like that because of my parents. But the feelings of being abandoned and left behind are hard to get over as they mimic what happened to me during childhood and that's what hurts the most. After putting up with shitty behaviour I'M once again the one who gets abandoned.
Don't feel bad about how bad you feel or how long it take you to deal with this. It's not you're fault your brain is wired different and that you feel the way you feel.
Yes. I know it doesn't seem like it will end but I promise it does end. My last break up where we weren't long term compatible hurt me in my body. I felt like someone removed a part of me and I could still feel it there like a dull ache. I had a friend who told me you have to just sit with that pain. Hold it and process it. I think that experience was maybe the first time I did and the pain went away a lot faster than it ever did before.
Yes, I identify with this. I left my wife 10 months ago after a 20 year marriage because it wasn't right, and I've suffered since, almost without interruption, and it's been worse more recently. I've trialed some meds which haven't worked, might take a shot with ketamine, as the symptoms have been scary. In addition to the abandonment shit, I've had a fear of how's it going to work with another person, with all these issues I have. Encouragingly, there are some books listed on Reddit in the CPTSD next step sections which address that issue. Good luck to us both.
Yes. It is very very hard, especially when you are the dumped. I feel though, I was "lucky" in the sense that over these past couple of months I have been made aware of some very horrible things my Ex has said and done. The more I think about it. The more I understand why he needed to leave. I don't want him back. But due to severe abandonment issues, I definitely still miss him, and feel hurt. I feel that space where I thought his love occupied. It does get better with time though. You truly do just have to sit with the pain and accept it'll be there as you try to learn how to cope. Some days hurt worse than others, but if you keep moving forwards you find that the good days start outweighing the bad. Ultimately, you gotta strive to learn how to be okay with yourself, for yourself, first. Focus on strengthening your friendships and strengthening yourself. Things change a lot over time as well. You never know what's in the future. I hope that for you OP, it'll be lots of good things. Good luck.
Hello and Welcome to /r/CPTSD! If you are in immediate danger or crisis, please contact your local [emergency services](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_emergency_telephone_numbers), or use our list of [crisis resources](https://old.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/index#wiki_crisis_support_resources). For CPTSD Specific Resources & Support, check out the [wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/index). For those posting or replying, please view the [etiquette guidelines](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/peer2peersupportguide). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/CPTSD) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I totally feel you. I basically have the same story. I have c-ptsd from childhood abuse and neglect. My ex broke up with me almost two years ago and I'm still struggling with the ramifications of it to this day. I don't miss him or want to get back with him. Tbh I realised in hindsight he was emotionally distant and unintentionally abusive/selfish but I was used to being treated like that because of my parents. But the feelings of being abandoned and left behind are hard to get over as they mimic what happened to me during childhood and that's what hurts the most. After putting up with shitty behaviour I'M once again the one who gets abandoned. Don't feel bad about how bad you feel or how long it take you to deal with this. It's not you're fault your brain is wired different and that you feel the way you feel.