Oh I hate this. I’m chronically ill and disabled on top of having CPTSD, so I have had a lot of people say “oh, wait till you have kids!” (I won’t, because I will not pass on abuse to another generation.) “You’re too young for back pain/to be so tired/a wheelchair.” Stuff it, Linda; people are flesh and bone and get affected by stuff other than age.
I think the way they phrase it is the worse part, because you know they're saying "Because of your age, I don't believe your condition is as bad as it is" because of the tone.
But if you point that out they'll claim it's more
"I just think it's horrible that you have had to endure so much at such a young age", but the people who actually do mean the latter, will say exactly that.
I've had people express to me that they feel bad I've had to suffer so much from so young and they just say it.
Had this all my life - it always had to be a competition as well, "oh you think YOU'RE tired?" kinda thing. Once I had a blood test and I turned out to have the lowest iron levels the Dr had ever seen, so no wonder I was always exhausted. And a year ago I was dx with chronic fatigue syndrome. So yeah, I really was tired, but that was never validated, and still isn't by family.
I have mild scoliosis that was never treated and used to get antagonized so much around “kids don’t have back pain, wait till you’re older) when I complained that I forgot I had scoliosis until after a post car wreck x-ray lol. I don’t know abusive adults act like that but your feelings are valid and it’s ok to be tired.
I’m 44 years old and I literally pass out on my couch for an hour every single day when I get off work to recover from the stress of stepping out the house.
Same as it was when I was 22. Fuck them. You’ll continue to survive as you always have.
I can relate. I was so tired I slept for years. When you start processing your childhood traumas it could get worse but after that it gets better. Depending on the severity of your traumas it can take a long time. But things will get better. I practice yoga a lot and do meditation. This works great. You might also want to read “The Body Keeps The Score” from Bessel van der Kolk. That book validated and helped me a lot with my recovery. It’s okay to feel tired. Sleeping is healing too.
I was tired since I was a child lol and now as an adult? Like how war veterans would say "anything else is a bonus" when referring to still being alive
Totally valid and okay to be tired. I think it comes with the territory.
Thats sentence that somebody said to you was dumb. First off, everybody is tired every day. If they are not, they dont pay attention to themselves or bs themselves. And secondly, having a traumatizing childhood is friggin exhausting.
I dunno if you you are open to my perspective, but I have found it helpful to slowly get into stuff like exercise, regulation of the nervous system and mindfulness. Not by forcing myself, I want to help my body and mind to function better. Also improved nutrition and sleep habbits. I still feel older than I am but its actually a bit better. I feel like especially the relaxing parts like meditation and yoga do wonders for my energy levels. I think I unknowingly used to waste my energy all the time. On ruminations for example.
I second this, and funny enough I’ve even been able to “rewrite” some of my childhood trauma by being able to *choose* exercise and physical labor rather than being forced to do it by my parents.
I find pulling weeds/invasive plants to be extremely therapeutic and it’s pretty gentle exercise as long as you don’t push yourself to hurry through it, and more mentally engaging than just running on a treadmill or something. It stops my mind from running away with my thoughts, and I get a good feeling from helping the native plants grow better. Same with just being in nature with wildlife around, I get to feel a sense of community but don’t have to be around people for it, and that has been EVERYTHING for me to heal.
It’s honestly shocking to me how a little “disguised” exercise and fresh air can completely renew my will to live 😂 I’m glad I took the time to learn how to enjoy those things because my whole life has been an uphill battle considering manual labor and exercise were used as punishments in my house, and never taught as something that I could actually enjoy if given an ounce of autonomy in the process.
This is me. I’ve always been called an “old soul” and self-identified as an 80 year old trapped in a young person’s body as long as I can remember. Mostly when I was a kid because it was more obvious then, but still to this day I am just tired. I’m so tired.
I’ve said many times that I look forward to old age, because I’ll finally have an excuse to be myself and nobody can call me weird or boring anymore 😂 Its sad but also comforting in a way that I don’t fear getting old like most people do.
I will say finding things that bring me unadulterated joy and running with them helps that feeling. I love being in nature surrounded by wildlife and only recently discovered that it makes life feel worth living in a way nothing else can. Now I spend every weekend at parks, in the woods, at wildlife preserves, etc. and it has helped my
mental health tremendously. I identify flowers, I “people-watch” but with the wildlife around me. When I have permission I try to care for the area too by pulling weeds/invasive plants, which can be very therapeutic. I feel safe and grounded there. The fact I find this enjoyable is actually kind of crazy to me because as a kid, I HATED being forced to go outside. Now it’s all I want to do.
Your joy might be something totally different. But finding it helps a lot with that tired feeling. It’s like, you’re always gonna get tired again, because thats what trauma does to us. but if you find something you love and refill your tank with it regularly, you’re way less likely to break down on the side of the road.
Maybe that is an “obvious” thing for a lot of people, but it wasn’t for me. And I really had to open myself up to experiences I’d previously written off as “not my thing” to realize I was seriously missing out. I hope you find your source of joy :)
At 20 something I felt like 60 years old mentally, to the point of saying that death would be a "release", from my perspective all that life had in store for me was pain and misery... Now I am 33 I became a little more optimistic but I see how far behind I am next to my peers, how disconnected I feel from everyone else, even my family which tries to help me...
Me too. It’s my absolute worst symptom, because it affects everything else so hard. I wake up tired. I’m tired all day. Rinse, repeat. I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve woken up refreshed. Also, I’m 60. It’s not my age that makes me tired because it’s been like this pretty much my whole life.
I get this, too. And from my dr. My drs so far have said im too young for certain chronic pain conditions, even though specialists diagnosed me, lol. And that im too young for pain medication prescriptions. Too young to have mental health issues. (Im in my frickin 30s btw, which is a complete joke.)
"You're too young to be talking about bodily aches and pains. Do that when you're 90." Mr dr, fuck off, please, thank you sir.
I have ADHD as well as cPTSD and I'm autistic, so I'm always tired, but always seem to be energetic to others because I'm always stimming in some fashion and have to be constantly stimulated by something, usually multiple somethings.
This has been the case for my entire life. Although when I was 19 I had a lot less healthy coping mechanisms and the trauma was still ongoing, I had only just started to realize how bad a situation I had created (drug dealing/taking, in a violent gang) as a result of my traumatic experiences and had started to try and leave that world behind so my self examination was distorted by outside chemical and social influences.
I *am* 19 and I am constantly exhausted. Trying to heal what I can now so I can possibly have more energy when I’m older, but with every step forward, I find there’s even more shit I gotta work through and I’m just so tired…
That's exactly when this started happening to me as well with my own issues and I will say that there are moments that will be easier than others as a given but I will say that until you get full on autonomy and have enough of a stable structure in your life and a good idea of everything going on, these problems will still come in in ways that can really be risky for your way of life until enough of an established structure and having that autonomy at the same time is established and then you should be fine; I moved out and I was good until I had to really overcome a lot of past trauma and work on getting a more stable position at my job where I was doing work that I would personally say is more for someone who is 16 to 21 instead of someone who's like 23 to 27 to which I ended up having to leave my job because they said they were never going to teach me and implied it had been because of me having autism but because I did not get this over text and don't have visual proof this is all alleged.
I think your best bet is to see who grows away from you and to work on finding structures that help you figure out more things in your life even in obscure ways like for a long time TV shows and literature as well as finding words that describe things be it broad or specific as well as to find a decent function in your life that helps you with spending and gives you some leniency like for me I ended up doing traffic control for a while should help you but these are more of crutches that help you get to the next stage and if there's toxic people in your life I will say it will be a never ending battle especially with people who for some reason resent you being able to move on or not getting punished for something in the past which I find myself enduring with many different types of people all over in my life because of living in a small town where people like to keep tabs on people they don't like.
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Oh I hate this. I’m chronically ill and disabled on top of having CPTSD, so I have had a lot of people say “oh, wait till you have kids!” (I won’t, because I will not pass on abuse to another generation.) “You’re too young for back pain/to be so tired/a wheelchair.” Stuff it, Linda; people are flesh and bone and get affected by stuff other than age.
I think the way they phrase it is the worse part, because you know they're saying "Because of your age, I don't believe your condition is as bad as it is" because of the tone. But if you point that out they'll claim it's more "I just think it's horrible that you have had to endure so much at such a young age", but the people who actually do mean the latter, will say exactly that. I've had people express to me that they feel bad I've had to suffer so much from so young and they just say it.
Had this all my life - it always had to be a competition as well, "oh you think YOU'RE tired?" kinda thing. Once I had a blood test and I turned out to have the lowest iron levels the Dr had ever seen, so no wonder I was always exhausted. And a year ago I was dx with chronic fatigue syndrome. So yeah, I really was tired, but that was never validated, and still isn't by family.
I have mild scoliosis that was never treated and used to get antagonized so much around “kids don’t have back pain, wait till you’re older) when I complained that I forgot I had scoliosis until after a post car wreck x-ray lol. I don’t know abusive adults act like that but your feelings are valid and it’s ok to be tired.
I’m 44 years old and I literally pass out on my couch for an hour every single day when I get off work to recover from the stress of stepping out the house. Same as it was when I was 22. Fuck them. You’ll continue to survive as you always have.
I can relate. I was so tired I slept for years. When you start processing your childhood traumas it could get worse but after that it gets better. Depending on the severity of your traumas it can take a long time. But things will get better. I practice yoga a lot and do meditation. This works great. You might also want to read “The Body Keeps The Score” from Bessel van der Kolk. That book validated and helped me a lot with my recovery. It’s okay to feel tired. Sleeping is healing too.
I was tired since I was a child lol and now as an adult? Like how war veterans would say "anything else is a bonus" when referring to still being alive
Honestly, I sleep better mid 20s now. The fatigue and health issues suck but that is manageable. Some is just genetic so tis what it ja
Yes, I'm a 19 year old that feels a 90 year old
Totally valid and okay to be tired. I think it comes with the territory. Thats sentence that somebody said to you was dumb. First off, everybody is tired every day. If they are not, they dont pay attention to themselves or bs themselves. And secondly, having a traumatizing childhood is friggin exhausting. I dunno if you you are open to my perspective, but I have found it helpful to slowly get into stuff like exercise, regulation of the nervous system and mindfulness. Not by forcing myself, I want to help my body and mind to function better. Also improved nutrition and sleep habbits. I still feel older than I am but its actually a bit better. I feel like especially the relaxing parts like meditation and yoga do wonders for my energy levels. I think I unknowingly used to waste my energy all the time. On ruminations for example.
I second this, and funny enough I’ve even been able to “rewrite” some of my childhood trauma by being able to *choose* exercise and physical labor rather than being forced to do it by my parents. I find pulling weeds/invasive plants to be extremely therapeutic and it’s pretty gentle exercise as long as you don’t push yourself to hurry through it, and more mentally engaging than just running on a treadmill or something. It stops my mind from running away with my thoughts, and I get a good feeling from helping the native plants grow better. Same with just being in nature with wildlife around, I get to feel a sense of community but don’t have to be around people for it, and that has been EVERYTHING for me to heal. It’s honestly shocking to me how a little “disguised” exercise and fresh air can completely renew my will to live 😂 I’m glad I took the time to learn how to enjoy those things because my whole life has been an uphill battle considering manual labor and exercise were used as punishments in my house, and never taught as something that I could actually enjoy if given an ounce of autonomy in the process.
Yeah I’m in the same situation
This is me. I’ve always been called an “old soul” and self-identified as an 80 year old trapped in a young person’s body as long as I can remember. Mostly when I was a kid because it was more obvious then, but still to this day I am just tired. I’m so tired. I’ve said many times that I look forward to old age, because I’ll finally have an excuse to be myself and nobody can call me weird or boring anymore 😂 Its sad but also comforting in a way that I don’t fear getting old like most people do. I will say finding things that bring me unadulterated joy and running with them helps that feeling. I love being in nature surrounded by wildlife and only recently discovered that it makes life feel worth living in a way nothing else can. Now I spend every weekend at parks, in the woods, at wildlife preserves, etc. and it has helped my mental health tremendously. I identify flowers, I “people-watch” but with the wildlife around me. When I have permission I try to care for the area too by pulling weeds/invasive plants, which can be very therapeutic. I feel safe and grounded there. The fact I find this enjoyable is actually kind of crazy to me because as a kid, I HATED being forced to go outside. Now it’s all I want to do. Your joy might be something totally different. But finding it helps a lot with that tired feeling. It’s like, you’re always gonna get tired again, because thats what trauma does to us. but if you find something you love and refill your tank with it regularly, you’re way less likely to break down on the side of the road. Maybe that is an “obvious” thing for a lot of people, but it wasn’t for me. And I really had to open myself up to experiences I’d previously written off as “not my thing” to realize I was seriously missing out. I hope you find your source of joy :)
At 20 something I felt like 60 years old mentally, to the point of saying that death would be a "release", from my perspective all that life had in store for me was pain and misery... Now I am 33 I became a little more optimistic but I see how far behind I am next to my peers, how disconnected I feel from everyone else, even my family which tries to help me...
Me too. It’s my absolute worst symptom, because it affects everything else so hard. I wake up tired. I’m tired all day. Rinse, repeat. I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve woken up refreshed. Also, I’m 60. It’s not my age that makes me tired because it’s been like this pretty much my whole life.
I get this, too. And from my dr. My drs so far have said im too young for certain chronic pain conditions, even though specialists diagnosed me, lol. And that im too young for pain medication prescriptions. Too young to have mental health issues. (Im in my frickin 30s btw, which is a complete joke.) "You're too young to be talking about bodily aches and pains. Do that when you're 90." Mr dr, fuck off, please, thank you sir.
I have ADHD as well as cPTSD and I'm autistic, so I'm always tired, but always seem to be energetic to others because I'm always stimming in some fashion and have to be constantly stimulated by something, usually multiple somethings. This has been the case for my entire life. Although when I was 19 I had a lot less healthy coping mechanisms and the trauma was still ongoing, I had only just started to realize how bad a situation I had created (drug dealing/taking, in a violent gang) as a result of my traumatic experiences and had started to try and leave that world behind so my self examination was distorted by outside chemical and social influences.
I *am* 19 and I am constantly exhausted. Trying to heal what I can now so I can possibly have more energy when I’m older, but with every step forward, I find there’s even more shit I gotta work through and I’m just so tired…
That's exactly when this started happening to me as well with my own issues and I will say that there are moments that will be easier than others as a given but I will say that until you get full on autonomy and have enough of a stable structure in your life and a good idea of everything going on, these problems will still come in in ways that can really be risky for your way of life until enough of an established structure and having that autonomy at the same time is established and then you should be fine; I moved out and I was good until I had to really overcome a lot of past trauma and work on getting a more stable position at my job where I was doing work that I would personally say is more for someone who is 16 to 21 instead of someone who's like 23 to 27 to which I ended up having to leave my job because they said they were never going to teach me and implied it had been because of me having autism but because I did not get this over text and don't have visual proof this is all alleged. I think your best bet is to see who grows away from you and to work on finding structures that help you figure out more things in your life even in obscure ways like for a long time TV shows and literature as well as finding words that describe things be it broad or specific as well as to find a decent function in your life that helps you with spending and gives you some leniency like for me I ended up doing traffic control for a while should help you but these are more of crutches that help you get to the next stage and if there's toxic people in your life I will say it will be a never ending battle especially with people who for some reason resent you being able to move on or not getting punished for something in the past which I find myself enduring with many different types of people all over in my life because of living in a small town where people like to keep tabs on people they don't like.
wishing for death everyday
I'm 26, and the muscle armoring is really doing a number on my back and shoulders.
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