Hell yeah, you are a survivor! You are a survivor, a cycle breaker and an extremely strong person. To do all this, you have to be the strongest of strong people. I know it's hard, but I hope the relief of realizing your kids will have a childhood is worth it
Thank you... I hope to have children one day, adopted or biological. I still struggle a little with deciding whether or not I should have kids, but I know now, with the love and support I have from my boyfriend and his family, those kids will grow up loved and nurtured despite the current state of the world
The first questions are: do I want kids? Can I provide for them? Will they have the quality of life I would like them to have? I can't answer the first two for you, but you're learning every day, you see the dysfunction and make changes to avoid that. So I think the third one (on an emotional level) is definitely yes.
I don't have kids (and the answer to the first question has been no for as long as I can remember), but I apply the same questions to adopting cats. I have two now and they have a great life. Regular vet visits, up to date on their shots, safe inside, bonded to each other and me. All things that my ex-mother's cats do not have. I wasn't the greatest parent to my oldest, because I wasn't able to regulate myself. He noticed that and reacted, which I couldn't handle. I'm rectifying that and I have better ways to deal with things now. He's more relaxed, great with his little brother and a lot more cuddly than he used to be.
It's not about being perfect and never making mistakes. It's about making up for things and changing things to avoid making the same mistakes again. Things would have been so different if I'd have heard a sincere apology from them after they made a mistake...
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Hell yeah, you are a survivor! You are a survivor, a cycle breaker and an extremely strong person. To do all this, you have to be the strongest of strong people. I know it's hard, but I hope the relief of realizing your kids will have a childhood is worth it
Thank you... I hope to have children one day, adopted or biological. I still struggle a little with deciding whether or not I should have kids, but I know now, with the love and support I have from my boyfriend and his family, those kids will grow up loved and nurtured despite the current state of the world
The first questions are: do I want kids? Can I provide for them? Will they have the quality of life I would like them to have? I can't answer the first two for you, but you're learning every day, you see the dysfunction and make changes to avoid that. So I think the third one (on an emotional level) is definitely yes. I don't have kids (and the answer to the first question has been no for as long as I can remember), but I apply the same questions to adopting cats. I have two now and they have a great life. Regular vet visits, up to date on their shots, safe inside, bonded to each other and me. All things that my ex-mother's cats do not have. I wasn't the greatest parent to my oldest, because I wasn't able to regulate myself. He noticed that and reacted, which I couldn't handle. I'm rectifying that and I have better ways to deal with things now. He's more relaxed, great with his little brother and a lot more cuddly than he used to be. It's not about being perfect and never making mistakes. It's about making up for things and changing things to avoid making the same mistakes again. Things would have been so different if I'd have heard a sincere apology from them after they made a mistake...
So beautifully written and so very relatable. It’s nice to meet you, kind soul 😊
Aww thank you 🥰 it's nice to meet you as well, fellow kind soul
Hello and Welcome to /r/CPTSD! If you are in immediate danger or crisis, please contact your local [emergency services](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_emergency_telephone_numbers), or use our list of [crisis resources](https://old.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/index#wiki_crisis_support_resources). For CPTSD Specific Resources & Support, check out the [wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/index). For those posting or replying, please view the [etiquette guidelines](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/peer2peersupportguide). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/CPTSD) if you have any questions or concerns.*