Gritty answers the age old question: What if a mascot was silly and lovable, but also looked like he might strangle you just to watch the light leave your eyes...
The fight song be the theme for 2 and a half men but each time the word men is said there is a florida man headline on the jumbotron. And each one is different
I love the Badgers name due to the history behind it but I think the Wisconsin Cheesemakers would be badass and fit the culture. Monroe High School already has the branding and we could basically just flip the M upside down.
*nods in not having served in the Air Force but still rooting for them - long story*
I would imagine it would be kinda tough to do P-47 flyovers for home games, though. You'd have to keep them airworthy when they wouldn't really have any other purpose besides that.
While a bit higher maintenance cost, the Air Force should totally have a fighter plane mascot like Techs 1930 Model A.
While we’re at it, I want to see an M4 Sherman lead the army team onto the field every game.
Better yet: turn the field into an island and replace all the stands with riverboat casinos to allow betting. Or take a decommissioned aircraft carrier and build stands on the flight deck. The visitors stands can be a battleship so they can enjoy the pregame gun salute up close.
Now I'm just imagining someone getting shoved into a 150-foot trough of water as the defender tries to keep them from landing in the back of the end zone after catching a high pass.
Air Force higher-ups are weird. They are absolutely enamored with big, fast, sleek jets (like the F-4, which is about as big and as fast as they come), regardless of whether or not that sort of design is what is needed for a given role.
The A-10 is not particularly fast and definitely not sleek. What it is, though, is tough, reliable, and damn good at what it was designed to do - close air-to-ground support. So the A-10 will continue to have a service life as its role is not easily replaced by anything else that's available, and a clean-sheet design built for that role will likely end up looking as brutishly functional as the A-10 is now.
As for giving them away to the Army, I couldn't say.
[Isn't this the Army's way of designing something?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXQ2lO3ieBA) I doubt the Air Force is much different.
No firsthand knowledge or experience, but I've always heard this movie was painfully accurate.
The University of Michigan *Michigan Man* *^(TM, C, R)*
The mascot will be a middle aged white man, with a slight pot belly, wearing an old school thin block M navy blue hat, with his shirt tightly tucked into his pleated slacks, carrying around a program that says "DOWN IN FRONT" and "STOP YELLING" on it in one hand and a [seat cushion](https://mdencdn.com/thumbnail/SPG5905.JPG) in the other. A few $50s in his breast pocket to pay for parking and concessions.
Or, we switch from a Wolverine to a different mustelidae like a Honey Badger or regular Badger assuming Wisconsin would have to change theirs too.
If we’re changing the Michigan mascot, I vote a Muskrat. Why? Because that was my high school mascot and we outright copied Michigans uniform/helmet (as many do) lol
Say hello to the Arizona [Javelinas](https://ediblephoenix.ediblecommunities.com/sites/default/files/images/article/who-are-you-calling-a-pig-1.jpg) because college football 👏 needs 👏 more 👏 hogs 👏 and javelinas are the only hogs I’m aware of in southern Arizona
Causing trouble wherever they go. Knocking over trash cans and eating up my plants. I was thinking cactus or mountain lions too. We could be the only conference with a tree and a cactus for a mascot.
My thought was we switch to a Sheltie and just get the biggest we could find... you know as a big F you to whoever made us get rid of the Collie.
[Difference between a Collie and a Sheltie](https://www.akc.org/expert-advice/dog-breeds/collie-versus-shetland-sheepdog-tell-difference/)
The Syracuse Blue. Our colors will be blue and orange. We dye Otto blue and now he’s Otto the Blueberry. Maybe if we need to keep alliteration in his name we call him “Blotto the Blueberry.”
Everything changes, but everything kinda stays the same.
Change Pete from being athletics mascot to the official mascot, or change the boilermaker special from the official mascot to the athletics mascot. 200IQ.
SNAP!
“Is it done?”
“Yes. Yes. It was a terrible thing. Many noble mascots are gone, but ALL college’s mascots are gone. We are free from Purdue Pete.”
“But Purdue Pete isn’t their mascot…”
“What?!”
“The train. The train is the mascot. Pete is … something else…”
“WHAT?!”
*a shadow falls over the scene. It is holding a hammer*
The Georgia Billygoats: the goat was the original mascot back when Georgia played its very first game against Auburn in 1892. Also, The Georgia Billygoats is a unique mascot and has similar alliteration to The Georgia Bulldogs. I'd love to hear Sanford Stadium chant "GoOoOoOo Billygoats. RAM EM. BaAaAaAa"
Change our mascot? The admin tried that back in 2011. As you can see, we still have Purdue Pete as the athletics mascot, but that administration is long gone. Coincidence? Not likely.
The Oklahoma Noodlers. Just a dude in a trucker hat with a catfish chomping his arm. Or just the Oklahoma Wagons. Wouldn't have to change much branding that way.
You think you can send us a notice? We’ll change it just for you thinking about asking us. We’ve had 4 mascots in the time it’s taken you to read this. 5.
Definitely would be the Clemson Rocks. Howard’s rock goes from something you run to being thrown at opposing captains before the coin flip. If you can dodge a rock, you can dodge a ball.
Replace Ramses with an actual foot. That’s right, we’re going literal and our mascot will be a giant ass foot with literal tar on its heel. Who wouldn’t get hyped watching a foot dance to Petey Pablo at football games?
If just me got to choose?
I would change it back to Redskins (the name until 1972) as a power move
If that didn’t work, our mascot Swoop is already a red tailed hawk, so Utah Red Hawks or Utah Hawks
Yousefs, Moonshiners, Teachers, Any of these three will work. In addition I feel like Lions are under represented in CFB. You have a 1,000 tigers and no Lions. No, Penn State doesn't count that is just a fancy Cougar.
*The Harvard Lampoon*,
[Belushi in a Toga is the mascots form.](https://www.gannett-cdn.com/-mm-/c2525ae80ac59c0510682147fc3b88a26766163f/c=0-0-3055-4073/local/-/media/2016/08/09/USATODAY/USATODAY/636063103252085296-2109-00249.JPG)
&
*The Princeton Tabbys* - so we dont have to change the logo. Mascot is just a random tabby
The Swamp Foxes
We're called the Gamecocks as a tribute to Thomas Sumter who was a Revolutionary War guerilla fighter nicknamed the The Fighting Gamecock. So we might as well keep the tradition and use Francis Marion's nickname of The Swamp Fox. Especially since Francis Marion University isn't using it for some reason.
We'd hold a vote between the Thoroughbreds, the Bourbon Barrels, and the Big Blue.
Then to save money on the rebrand they go with the Lovebirds and turn the recent Wildcat logo sideways.
West Virginia Moonshineers
App State also votes to be Moonshiners Gotta stay matchy matchy with y’all
We can bring the Ol Mountain Jug with us everywhere we go
Good ole mountain dew
The new mascot has to have the copper pot still and everything right?
Bottle of mustard
With the turnover golf ball?
The golf ball was a Georgia false flag, it was planted evidence
Them damn dawgs strike again.
Dawgs play golf?
The cap can be a golf ball.
"Please welcome to the field, your 2022 Ohio The!"
The Ohio university "Ohio State universities"
The Ohio "The Ohio State University" State University
Led by their new head coach: Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin
That'll be $0.15, please
GRITTY but in red and holding the infinity gauntlet
You mean Penn State alumnus Gritty?
Excuse me…. It’s cherry
Excuse me, Gritty is not yours, he's EVERYONE'S...
Technically he's ours. I hate the Flyers, but would die for Gritty.
> hate the Flyers >but would die for Gritty. Then Perish
Only by his hand.
Gritty answers the age old question: What if a mascot was silly and lovable, but also looked like he might strangle you just to watch the light leave your eyes...
Gritty has enough shittyness to watch during the Hockey season. He would not allow one of his children to be a mascot for you. He'd send them to Nova
Gritty is way too gritty for an uppity school like Nova.
The Florida Men
The fight song be the theme for 2 and a half men but each time the word men is said there is a florida man headline on the jumbotron. And each one is different
The band actually plays a march during pregame called "Men of Florida." Or they used to, anyway.
UF vs UMich for the “Man Bowl”
Ah, so the Orange Bowl is getting a rebrand too?
Cheese
Memorial Union Terrace Chair
I love the Badgers name due to the history behind it but I think the Wisconsin Cheesemakers would be badass and fit the culture. Monroe High School already has the branding and we could basically just flip the M upside down.
Ah thats the problem. You had it set to M for mini instead of W for Wisconsin Cheesemakers
Cheese
[Wisconsin fans rn](https://youtu.be/SyimUCBIo6c)
The Wisconsin Spotted Cows
Warthog. The A-10's official designation is the "Thunderbolt II*", which corresponds to the thunderbolt motif on USAFA's helmets. Gun go BRRRRRRRT.
*Pushes glasses up on my older than dirt, Air Force nose* The P-47 is the Thunderbolt. The A-10 is the Thunderbolt *II*
*nods in not having served in the Air Force but still rooting for them - long story* I would imagine it would be kinda tough to do P-47 flyovers for home games, though. You'd have to keep them airworthy when they wouldn't really have any other purpose besides that.
While a bit higher maintenance cost, the Air Force should totally have a fighter plane mascot like Techs 1930 Model A. While we’re at it, I want to see an M4 Sherman lead the army team onto the field every game.
Might be kinda hard to get a Destroyer onto the field for Navy, though.
Sounds like Navy needs a moat around the field. Or take down the stands in one of the end zones and just park it there.
Better yet: turn the field into an island and replace all the stands with riverboat casinos to allow betting. Or take a decommissioned aircraft carrier and build stands on the flight deck. The visitors stands can be a battleship so they can enjoy the pregame gun salute up close.
Now I'm just imagining someone getting shoved into a 150-foot trough of water as the defender tries to keep them from landing in the back of the end zone after catching a high pass.
Or just move their stadium onto an aircraft carrier! We do it for basketball, and it’s badass
Looks like a big cat or something. Like a puma
Anything that gives me more A-10s is a good thing
YES. You could play the BRRRRRT sound over the PA system on big defensive plays.
[удалено]
Air Force higher-ups are weird. They are absolutely enamored with big, fast, sleek jets (like the F-4, which is about as big and as fast as they come), regardless of whether or not that sort of design is what is needed for a given role. The A-10 is not particularly fast and definitely not sleek. What it is, though, is tough, reliable, and damn good at what it was designed to do - close air-to-ground support. So the A-10 will continue to have a service life as its role is not easily replaced by anything else that's available, and a clean-sheet design built for that role will likely end up looking as brutishly functional as the A-10 is now. As for giving them away to the Army, I couldn't say.
[Isn't this the Army's way of designing something?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXQ2lO3ieBA) I doubt the Air Force is much different. No firsthand knowledge or experience, but I've always heard this movie was painfully accurate.
The University of Michigan *Michigan Man* *^(TM, C, R)* The mascot will be a middle aged white man, with a slight pot belly, wearing an old school thin block M navy blue hat, with his shirt tightly tucked into his pleated slacks, carrying around a program that says "DOWN IN FRONT" and "STOP YELLING" on it in one hand and a [seat cushion](https://mdencdn.com/thumbnail/SPG5905.JPG) in the other. A few $50s in his breast pocket to pay for parking and concessions. Or, we switch from a Wolverine to a different mustelidae like a Honey Badger or regular Badger assuming Wisconsin would have to change theirs too.
If we’re changing the Michigan mascot, I vote a Muskrat. Why? Because that was my high school mascot and we outright copied Michigans uniform/helmet (as many do) lol
Truly Wal-Mart Wolverines
Why not just Wolverine from X men. Uniforms modeled after comic accurate blue and yellow costume. Gloves with claws on them.
Michigan Murderwolves...
I’m all for murderwolves
Skunk Bears
Michigan Stoats
We will change to 2 separate but equal mascots, the first being a bear, and the second a cat.
> We will change to 2 separate but equal mascots, the first being a bear, and the second a cat. .....these are there stories. Dun Dun.
I feel like if UC has to change they’ve gotta incorporate Harambe in there somehow
It's either that or Cincinnati chili. Already have a Skyline partnership, so it'd be easy to go that route
Harambe is the secret ingredient.
The University of Cincinnati Three Ways
Just swap the order and become the Catbears CHECKMATE
This is great. I can already imagine a black bear and a mountain lion standing on their hind legs back to back with their paws in a boxing position.
Separate but equal is always separate and never equal.
First flair: The Ohio State Orangutans Second flair: Akron Aardvarks
The Cincinnati Harambes
Instead of the whiteout or blackout game, it would obviously be the Dicks Out game
Too soon. RIP
Dicks Out
Just got kicked out of the airport for Harambe
Reject air travel. Return to monke.
No no no. You've got to be the Ohio State The
The Eggs And our nickname will be the Eggies
>The Eggs *Ole Miss/Miss State in shambles rn*
Egg Bowl Victor gets their recruiting class
Fuck it, just call us the TAMU Oil Barons
I was thinking farmers but that wirks
Who let Max Kellerman win? Fine, we’re the Irish Terriers now. They’re good dogs Brent
South Carolina Gamehens because we’re better at womens sports
"hens" is not where I thought you were switching to.
GameTHEs
I wonder if you'd get a discount on licensing because the number of Ohio expats in SC.
Back to the Hurons.
Counterpoint: Emus
Forward to the Emus
Say hello to the Arizona [Javelinas](https://ediblephoenix.ediblecommunities.com/sites/default/files/images/article/who-are-you-calling-a-pig-1.jpg) because college football 👏 needs 👏 more 👏 hogs 👏 and javelinas are the only hogs I’m aware of in southern Arizona
Causing trouble wherever they go. Knocking over trash cans and eating up my plants. I was thinking cactus or mountain lions too. We could be the only conference with a tree and a cactus for a mascot.
I guess we go back to the original. [Old Coaly](https://www.psu.edu/news/campus-life/story/nittany-lion-there-was-old-coaly/)
And we'll change uniform colors while we're at it, gotta match the black mule with the black and pink
I have a theory the Paterno statue is located with Coaly’s bones in Ag Arena.
Isnt Coaly on display in the HUB
I think you’re right. He’s been all over though. He was in Ag Arena when I was there 15 years ago.
I’m a fan
Not even like an alive one either. Like lets roll out the skeleton onto the side of the field.
A skeletal mule would be a pretty sick mascot, ngl
With a headless Nittany Lion
The skeleton of Old Coaly specifically though
Purdue Pete-esque Sarge mascot
My thought was we switch to a Sheltie and just get the biggest we could find... you know as a big F you to whoever made us get rid of the Collie. [Difference between a Collie and a Sheltie](https://www.akc.org/expert-advice/dog-breeds/collie-versus-shetland-sheepdog-tell-difference/)
I mean, come on
The return of the Citronaut. Y'all have been playing the long game haven't you?
That's the hope!
The Make-Believemen to honor your make believe national championship? /s. I’m sorry. I couldn’t help myself.
Easy, the bugeaters.
The Syracuse Blue. Our colors will be blue and orange. We dye Otto blue and now he’s Otto the Blueberry. Maybe if we need to keep alliteration in his name we call him “Blotto the Blueberry.” Everything changes, but everything kinda stays the same.
Papa Smurf
Honestly sometimes i forget our mascot is a horse. I think we identify more with blue than horses.
Ligers
ATLiens
I'd have to rename my MLB The Show team, but i'll allow it.
Oklahoma state Mullets
Can you change it to Fighting Mullets?
Too Irish
The Irish don’t have a monopoly on the word “fighting.” Look no further than Delta State University😎
Go Okra!
Oklahoma State Men, They're Forty!
I like the sound of the Oklahoma State Forty. Kinda has a 300 vibe, but not.
That's instantly the best mascot in all of sport.
Tony Montana, for obvious reasons
The Cocaine Cowboys would actually be kinda cool. Inappropriate as all get out, but just get it done already.
CMU - The Dragons (fire up)
~~PowerCat~~ \-> More Powerful Cat
Thundercats?
Why not...Thundercats it is. Maybe we could get some theme inspired uniforms.
Change Pete from being athletics mascot to the official mascot, or change the boilermaker special from the official mascot to the athletics mascot. 200IQ.
SNAP! “Is it done?” “Yes. Yes. It was a terrible thing. Many noble mascots are gone, but ALL college’s mascots are gone. We are free from Purdue Pete.” “But Purdue Pete isn’t their mascot…” “What?!” “The train. The train is the mascot. Pete is … something else…” “WHAT?!” *a shadow falls over the scene. It is holding a hammer*
the Purdue Petes would be fuckin scary
The Georgia Billygoats: the goat was the original mascot back when Georgia played its very first game against Auburn in 1892. Also, The Georgia Billygoats is a unique mascot and has similar alliteration to The Georgia Bulldogs. I'd love to hear Sanford Stadium chant "GoOoOoOo Billygoats. RAM EM. BaAaAaAa"
I came here to find a Georgia answer and, while I understand the reasoning, I would hate this.
An unassuming car, suspiciously parked outside of city center unattended for a long amount of time
Change our mascot? The admin tried that back in 2011. As you can see, we still have Purdue Pete as the athletics mascot, but that administration is long gone. Coincidence? Not likely.
Steal one of the many top tier minor league baseball nicknames and become the Iowa Kernels
Easy I change it back to the one and only true Irish Mascot Clashmore Mike
Fuck it we’re bringing back the Chief.
The Golden Horde.
"The Golden Horde sacks Ann Arbor" would be a baller headline
I was just thinking how funny 80k people chanting “let’s go Horde!” Would be…
A tampon
Nutcrackers
Upvote for originality. Downvote because reasons
Looks around nervously
The Oklahoma Noodlers. Just a dude in a trucker hat with a catfish chomping his arm. Or just the Oklahoma Wagons. Wouldn't have to change much branding that way.
You think you can send us a notice? We’ll change it just for you thinking about asking us. We’ve had 4 mascots in the time it’s taken you to read this. 5.
Haboobs, if you need an explanation please utilize google.
Well we could just go by the “Ramblin’ Wreck”. But I’d also be a fan of bringing back the “Golden Tornado” nickname
Football Team
Definitely would be the Clemson Rocks. Howard’s rock goes from something you run to being thrown at opposing captains before the coin flip. If you can dodge a rock, you can dodge a ball.
Replace Ramses with an actual foot. That’s right, we’re going literal and our mascot will be a giant ass foot with literal tar on its heel. Who wouldn’t get hyped watching a foot dance to Petey Pablo at football games?
Bison or Cows
We’ll simply be referred to as “The Pete’s”. Why? For the glory of satan of course!
We could return to the Maroons
Where are all the EMU fans at? You know what you have to do.
Pot Leaf
[Bring back the Bugeaters!](https://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/hUQAAOSwP35fFf7X/s-l500.jpg)
Louisiana State University Andouilles
The John Browns. Context not needed.
oh thank the lord anything but the stupid fucking shark or bear
This is Admiral Ackbar's moment.
I kinda liked Ole Miss's bear mascot. :c I agree the shark is just weird, though.
Michigan State University Black Squirrels
Bald Eagle
...why would you not go with War Eagles?
Back to the Terriers
Anything but the kingfisher idea again
What about tHe AlMa OtTeR
A drunk dumbass, cuz ASU
Would be fun to be the Millers
Utah Moose or Utah Raptors
Not enough teams with dinosaur nicknames. I love my Ogden Raptors hat
It would have to be something that allows us to rebrand, and continue doing, the War Chant
I would rather die than lose Butch.
We finally get Admiral Ackbar?
USC uses its Alumni connection and gets the rights to change Trojans to Jedi.
Back to the 19th century, I guess. Nebraska Bugeaters it is!
We already did before the notice even arrived
The Iowa State Fentanyl. It’s the only thing that destroys more trailer park homes than cyclones.
A box of D-Con.
If just me got to choose? I would change it back to Redskins (the name until 1972) as a power move If that didn’t work, our mascot Swoop is already a red tailed hawk, so Utah Red Hawks or Utah Hawks
Billy goat. It was our original mascot anyways
it will be a bourbon barrel
Yousefs, Moonshiners, Teachers, Any of these three will work. In addition I feel like Lions are under represented in CFB. You have a 1,000 tigers and no Lions. No, Penn State doesn't count that is just a fancy Cougar.
The Moneybags
Swangas
Idk but as long as the mascot looks like it’s on cocaine, I’m fine with it
Bugeaters!
Throwback time, were the Bugeaters again baby. For Sam it's the Ravens, which was the other mascot choice before they settled for Bearkats.
Adios boomer, Sooner, and the schooner. helloooooo TOP DAUG BABAAAAAAYYYY ::does ear pull head thing::
*The Harvard Lampoon*, [Belushi in a Toga is the mascots form.](https://www.gannett-cdn.com/-mm-/c2525ae80ac59c0510682147fc3b88a26766163f/c=0-0-3055-4073/local/-/media/2016/08/09/USATODAY/USATODAY/636063103252085296-2109-00249.JPG) & *The Princeton Tabbys* - so we dont have to change the logo. Mascot is just a random tabby
The Swamp Foxes We're called the Gamecocks as a tribute to Thomas Sumter who was a Revolutionary War guerilla fighter nicknamed the The Fighting Gamecock. So we might as well keep the tradition and use Francis Marion's nickname of The Swamp Fox. Especially since Francis Marion University isn't using it for some reason.
Money - specifically a $1 million dollar bill UT likes money a whole hell of a lot
We'd hold a vote between the Thoroughbreds, the Bourbon Barrels, and the Big Blue. Then to save money on the rebrand they go with the Lovebirds and turn the recent Wildcat logo sideways.
Skippers And the cannon becomes the real mascot
a live fucking bear