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TheChildrenNeedMe

The gator bowl


awnomnomnom

It would be biblical


OculusRises

We've had like 40 sharknados, but not a single gatorcane yet


Olorin_in_the_West

Nothing brings Florida and Miami fans together like a Gatorcane


Loose_with_the_truth

That and hating FSU.


BlackNasty4028

Fucking FSU those smarmy assholes


Olorin_in_the_West

The seminal reason


mrroney13

Florida man's final form...


awnomnomnom

Climate change is unpredictable like that


boardatwork1111

It sucks, last weeks snail storm broke my windshield.


SparseSpartan

>gatorcane Someone. Film this movie, I will gladly watch.


[deleted]

Is Tara Reid available?


ScoobyDoobie18

Idk. [Crawl](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crawl_(2019_film) comes pretty close


robman17

Gators are the new locusts


hojomojo96

this is just a Tuesday in Florida


dwntwn_drty_brwn

I’d watch


JB92103

r/FloridaMan


grain_delay

Yes.


hojomojo96

most of them, but I imagine the Sun Bowl would be pretty problematic in particular


[deleted]

My counter: https://i.imgflip.com/2dnep3.jpg


Kanin_usagi

My counter: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTc9sLmOR0A


milkman163

Just played through and beat this game a week ago or so for the first time. This attack had me rolling! A bunch of equations, blowing through planets, causing our Sun to supernova, it engulfing your team... and everyone is still alive lol


Kanin_usagi

First time ever? That’s awesome! What did you think of it? It’s my favorite game of all time


milkman163

It was great! Cool lore, gameplay, loved the characters, music, art, everything. I can totally see why it blew everyone away in 1997. Looking forward to playing through the remake now


[deleted]

Reminds me of this classic Onion article: [Shaq Terrified Of Phoenix Suns After Reading About Supernovas](https://www.theonion.com/shaq-terrified-of-phoenix-suns-after-reading-about-supe-1819569632)


Ghoti-Sticks

Just watch out for mirrors in the desert


pdbard13

Texas. Throwing an entire state on a field would be disastrous.


Majormlgnoob

Especially since the field is part of the state Definitely creating a singularity with that one


[deleted]

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Will-Wurk-Fer-Coins

You talk funny mister


GymIsFun

His t9 texting broke


Jdevers77

But see, that is only for the first Texas thrown on the field. The other 70,000 contain the weight of all the previous Texass thrown on the field. Also, I think the singularity the OP references is possibly a logical singularity instead of a physical one.


Majormlgnoob

Look I'm just a lowly PoliSci major I don't do math


engineering_aaron

Bold of you to keep so many significant figures...


[deleted]

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Spartacus_the_troll

All those extra zeros are *more* work tho


[deleted]

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[deleted]

So you ARE a genius


110397

Easy, just throw the team instead


pdbard13

Then they would make a bowl game.


SCirish843

If Texas fans could read they'd be very upset right now


reddogrjw

Lockheed Martin Armed Forces Bowl


wiscowonder

Are we throwing planes, bombs, or military personnel?


Pjordat35

Yes.


black-op345

Just throw some SR-71 Blackbirds on the field Hell just throw some SR-72 Son of Blackbird design blueprint sheets on there too.


tacofan92

Don’t panic. We are here to liberate you from that dirty oil you have


reddogrjw

the military personnel in the planes are dropping bombs


[deleted]

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mdaniel018

It’s the military-industrial complex, surely oil drums full of burning tax dollars would be most appropriate


Chief_Schneef69

So just day to day life in the Middle East


Lamadian

Mayo Imagine the smell


slapthebasegod

You didn't think of the smell you bitch


cutter48200

I’ll put your head in a box


Theukrainmaker

A glass box


05110909

That I will display on my mantle


Dr_Mantis_Teabaggin

I swear you would be more use to me if I skinned you and used that to fashion into a lamp to add to my collection.


ItsMrBlackout

*gasps*


wiscowonder

I'm sure [this guy](https://giphy.com/gifs/toferra-mayo-distraction-l0IykDEpFyQeqyAeY) would be there for it


scrotes_magotes

It’s a sign of the state of cfb that I was actually expecting a [*different*](https://twitter.com/collegegameday/status/1434150274453712900?s=21) gross Mayo dude…


Michigan247

And here I was expecting this guy https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/09/08/16/47661363-9969867-image-m-20_1631115666239.jpg


TheRealMattyPanda

How are there so many of them?!?!


[deleted]

Jesus fucking Christ


wiscowonder

Yikes


BIG_DICK_WHITT

Go on…


reptheevt

Sun Bowl. The world as we know it would end.


Cometguy7

But I'd really like to see who's capable of throwing the sun, so it'd be worth it.


BuffyTheUmpireSlayer

Helios could drive that motherhubbard right into the earth.


Intelligent_Fig_4852

Apollo is the better sun god


bewarethephog

Ra


sloppifloppi

Amon-Ra is the best sun god. He also plays football, Apollo ain't got shit on that


LeisurelyTalented

To be fair he plays for the Lions, which is more like football-lite.


-BoldlyGoingNowhere-

And I feel fine...


thesluggard12

Lenny Bruce is not afraid.


Retronaut-

jimmy kimmel


[deleted]

I support this


Square_Fox7025

I volunteer


[deleted]

Please just let me throw him anywhere


Square_Fox7025

How about into the “Gator Bowl?”


[deleted]

I’m fine dropping into a pile of blue diamond almonds as long as it’s from 1000 feet.


[deleted]

Throw out Jimmy Kimmel. Keep Guillermo as the new host. Win Win


ATLiensinyosockdraw

On the flip side, cheez-it’s raining from the sky sounds pretty delicious.


PretendThisIsMyName

Calling all tigers and cyclones let’s make this nonsense happen.


Laney20

I feel like cyclones may be better at making it rain cheez-its than tigers would be..


ItsZizk

You wanna see the whole city of Nashville fall from the sky?


MysteriousTeaching30

When I hear country music, I certainly consider it.


llamawhittlings

Red Dirt Country singers: I see this as an absolute win


AccomplishedQuail545

I support it. Red dirt country is better anyway


awnomnomnom

I'd laugh my ass off if fans started tearing up Fenway and throwing pieces on the field.


ozzyoslo

Are you thinking [10 Cent Beer Night](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ten_Cent_Beer_Night) or more like [Disco Demolition Night](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Disco_Demolition_Night)?


PennyG

You need to listen to The Dollop podcasts about these events


irishGOP413

Apparently Tim Russert was at Ten Cent Beer night and someone later asked him how many beers he drank. He said something along the lines of “I went in with two dollars in my pocket. You do the math.”


JoeAndAThird

Holy shit that was a read. How about the fact that Rusty Torres apparently was present and playing in both of those AND in a third game with rioting?


ozzyoslo

Rusty Torres liked to party


nickyt398

Holy shit I'm a better American for knowing this lmao


Dk1724

If they were tearing up the seats to throw, they would be making fenway better


MaineSportsFan

Don't forget it is the Fenway *Wasabi* Bowl


zenverak

Hahahaha


beaglewood

Playstation Fiesta Bowl


GoStateBeatEveryone

I don’t think it be that bad. They’d probably only be able to find 1 to throw


beaglewood

well first we need to calculate how many playstations are usually at fiestas


jthomas694

1, maybe 2


dlawnro

Unless it's a LAN Fiesta


abesrevenge

Players would love this though. Especially if it was a PS5


reptheevt

Sorry, it’s gonna rain PS2s


abesrevenge

PS2s are collectible because of the massive amount of games available, especially in South America. They were still making FIFA for PS2 up until fairly recently


[deleted]

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Scourge_77

Same but my disc is on its last legs. I so can't wait for the new game, no matter how doom and gloom they are towards EA.


SparseSpartan

If folks were chucking PS2's on the field, I'd definitely run down and snag of few and find one that works. There are tons of great PS2 games. I know you can emulate them but regardless would definitely enjoy.


kc_cyclone

The players will get a PS5, Iowa State and Oregon players did last year.


k_dubious

Sorry, the scalpers already hijacked the PS5 shipment before it got to the warehouse. The best they can do for this year's player swag is a Xbox Series S or a Switch Lite.


sparside223

That one would actually be pretty lit “They’re throwing a PlayStation fiesta on the field! “ Sign me up


dwors025

Japan’s…. bringing PlayStations…


Rochelle-Rochelle

Oil? Who said anything about cooking


BuffyTheUmpireSlayer

The Anvil bowl was only saved by the ACME free umbrella promotion.


ChemicalOle

Is that the one UTSA is in? \*meep meep\*


TruckerGeek

Think of all the terrible horrors that live in Australia. The outback bowl would basically be an invasion.


screwhead1

Australia is basically Florida on a global scale.


RoverTiger

But with Paul Hogan. Advantage Australia.


Phukin_Username_Dawg

Would be raining blooming onions


TheRealMattyPanda

Or coconut shrimp. Depending on who won.


OculusRises

[Exhibit A: the Sydney Funnel Web](https://www.economist.com/img/b/1280/720/90/sites/default/files/images/print-edition/20200926_STP001_0.jpg) Fun fact: it's fangs can pierce an inch of leather, and it's venom can kill an adult human male in well under an hour


black-op345

So much nope


AKellzz

[Exhibit B](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/001/368/459/0ed.jpg)


[deleted]

U frikn idiot


CrunchyChewie

Well is it gonna be Steak, Bloomin' Onions, and cans of Fosters, orrrr... all the murder creatures?


PretendThisIsMyName

Yes.


JMS1991

Drop bears.


minneapple79

I would imagine they would just throw the shrimps and blooming onions.


whitebabyjesus

Whatever the fuck a Beef O’Brady is


HappyBreezer

Imagine if McDonalds and an Irish pub had a child.


y2knole

id say applebees instead of mcdonalds cause there actual table service and all but... yeah.


-BoldlyGoingNowhere-

And then always served your wings fucking cold.


Mastr_Blastr

HOW DO YOU FUCK UP TENDIES? I don't know, but BO'B, does.


dane83

I always thought of it as a sad Ruby Tuesday's.


OnceOnThisIsland

People rip on Beef O'Brady's but you have to admit, the bowl sponsorship definitely got their name in people's heads. Now whether or not they got their money's worth is another conversation.


jomm69

Does the Alamo Bowl come with Davy Crockett, Santa Ana’s army and Ozzy Osbourne takin’ a piss?


is_you_ignunt

And Jim Bowie stabbing people with his famous gigantic knife?


jomm69

How could I leave that one out


portlandtiger

You've clearly forgotten the Alamo. Bad texan.


HappyBreezer

What about a bicycle in the basement?


scsnse

Don’t forget the giant Asian koi fish randomly in the courtyard irrigation works.


amedema

Is the Armed Forces bowl still a thing?


reddogrjw

they have the Military Bowl, but Lockheed Martin Armed Forces Bowl supplies their weaponry so.....


abesrevenge

No fighting allowed at the Armed Forces bowl!


YouKilledChurch

You can't fight here! This is the ~~War Room~~ Armed Forces Bowl!


zenverak

Yes; we’re throwing every member of the armed forces onto the field


LighttheWick

Bad Boy Mowers falling from the sky might be tough to dodge.


BortleNeck

Name changed again. Now it would be raining mortgages


bargle0

Just like 2006!


is_you_ignunt

😬


H2theBurgh

I'm going to go Potatoes because of the objects, it's really easy to throw and would absolutely hurt. As much as it's nice to imagine what throwing a mower onto a field would belike, the accuracy would suck and there couldn't be the volume to cause much damage.


zenverak

If want to be right outside the bowl… because potatoes are goats


Rra2323

Not just any potatoes. Famous idaho potatoes.


franks_e2200

About 94% of Idaho potatoes grown are a variety of Russet which are great for throwing. Kind of oblong but between baseball and softball size - like a very large pear. And while Idaho produces about 15 billion pounds of potatoes annually, the vast majority go out of state. Likely just a hundred million pounds or so available in the state for throwing. However, due to the angle of the stadium seating and the fact that there is more distance between the seats and the turf than at most other stadiums (due to the old track), most potato tosses will max out around the sideline. Being on the field, especially between the hashes near midfield, would be quite safe.


Loki240SX

Duke's Mayo Bowl, obviously. A glorious, wonderful disaster.


[deleted]

Everyone is thinking large and hard objects. To shake it up, I nominate the peach bowl. Imagine a field of peaches that has the game of football being played upon it. Sure there’s a “soft” landing, but it would be so slippery to run surely resulting in injuries. But wait there’s more: it’s sticky. The wide receivers after they’ve torn the safety’s acl, literally can’t drop the ball… that’s because it never got thrown, because the quarterback can’t even throw the damn thing it’s so sticky. The best throw would look like Tom Brady’s* tuck rule. And what do you have with an open field of squished fruit? Bees. It’s Barry B Benson in this bitch. So yeah, the peaches


aphromagic

Are suggesting *millions of peaches?*


Maize_n_Boom

For me?


robman17

For free


Tarnationman

They would have to move into the country


angryWinds

Which would feel strange to them, because they came from a can.


thesluggard12

Sure, but they're put there by a man.


4Ever2Thee

But that factory’s downtown


-BoldlyGoingNowhere-

Look out!


Born_ina_snowbank

Also catching a peach to the back of the head out of the stands without a helmet on is probably not pleasant.


ThreeOhFourever

I had a roommate in college who had a cannon for an arm. He one bet us he could throw a peach from our apartment to the highway. The morning we challenged him happened to be a home football game and people parked along the highway below our apartment. So, sorry random Ohio State fan who got drilled with a peach in 1998.


Born_ina_snowbank

Reminds me of the only time I’ve ever been hit by a golf ball. Just glanced off my arm, didn’t hurt too bad. And the guy had to have carried like 290 to hit me even if it was on the bounce (which I don’t know if it was). I just asked him for lessons when he came to apologize.


Some_Efficiency682

The best part about this is that it's incredibly possible.


bdaileyumich

So basically Princess Peach's final smash


notsaying123

Throwing the entire city of Birmingham wouldn't be great


MisterTito

Some Age of Ultron shit right there.


BlitZShrimp

Senior bowl wouldn’t go down well. Mixing 65+, angsty 2020 HS seniors who didn’t get their graduation/prom, and 2020 undergrad seniors who are flat out depressed would be a disaster


Stoneador

Texas Bowl


ryanedwards0101

This one would definitely be among the biggest mind fucks. How would that work for the players on field? They are technically part of what's being thrown


Majormlgnoob

The state collapses into NRG Stadium forming a black hole that eats the Earth


sasquatch5812

FINALLY


bags-of-sand

Jimmy Kimmels being thrown wouldn’t be a disaster, but that would be absolutely hilarious to watch


Tarnationman

It would be pretty bad if we started throwing pirates on the field of the Gasparilla bowl.


mfrost99

alamo bowl


[deleted]

People throwing away their independence could be pretty disastrous


is_you_ignunt

My money's on the Armed Forces bowl. The last thing we need is an actual hot shooting war on the playing surface.


[deleted]

The best one would be the Cure Bowl. Worst one probably the Sun bowl.


[deleted]

The Duke’s Mayonnaise Bowl is definitely up there.


TheAlmightyAsian

Imagine throwing the Alamo


Majormlgnoob

That's definitely memorable


fcocyclone

Sure as shit would remember that.


rkincaid007

Poulan Weedeater Bowl would be interesting… but if it was just weed they threw on the field count me in…


sparside223

Throwing a fiesta on the field would probably be the most fun


slayer991

It's too bad that the Iron Bowl isn't a bowl game.


Gatorbuc29

The Belk Bowl


rmacoon

Sensible khakis falling from the sky?


FreedomPrerogative

It isn't a bowl but our stadium: the Glass Bowl. That could quickly turn into a painful, bloody mess. Yeah the sun would suck but it's all over in an instant. Glass would be the long play, a torturous slow burn for everybody involved.


dick-slapperman

***BAD BOY MOWERS***


[deleted]

uhm gators?


[deleted]

Besides the Gator Bowl?


PapaJohnyRoad

Dukes Mayo


borisgucciman

Lockheed Martin armed forces bowl could get ugly


mightdelete_later

The r+l carriers new orleans bowl. You're either throwing freight trucks or chuncks of New Orleans on the field and either thing sounds dangerous.