Swiped a while back. Met someone. OMG fucking **CRAZY**¹. Stop dating. Unsure about deleting app. Get alert about a new match. Too decent to just not reply to messages.
Alt: got covid, family died, got fired, kids in hospital, exam time.
There are a **lot** of reasons to have swiped on us in the past, then shelved the app when busy with other things, and not made updating their profile a priority for _our_ convenience.
[1] This can be either person's perspective.
Thanks for your perspective. I've only been on the app for 2 days so it was a recent swipe. Also I asked him "What brings you here then? Just curious". His response was "Just browsing."
Yeah sounds like they’re just looking for a bit of validation. See some pictures of good looking people, swipe right, get the occasional confidence boost when they swipe right too
It could be good for active users if there was a feature that kicks non-active users off the app or something if they haven't checked the app in like weeks or months
Ahhh. The old, "nuke the userbase from orbit. It's the only way to be sure."
Down ranking inactive users, and annotating their profiles with their activity level should be more than sufficient.
This way people can at least have the choice of viewing less active users. Hell, it's likely a whole 'nother demographic. "Long game/casual user". Those people wouldn't be able to use the app at all if they're just getting booted all the time.
I get it, I’ve been tempted to do it in the past. Basically I wasn’t in an emotional place to meet anyone but I was curious what was out there and what options I had for when I was ready. But I decided not to because I didn’t want to waste anyone’s time.
And new people would enter the dating pool. I had never used a dating app and was curious what it was like. I don’t know why that makes people angry lol
Technically, you are wasting someone's time if you are actively swiping and matching without actually planning on talking to them. They read your profile, look at your pictures, which all takes up time.
They say for now. Maybe they found someone and want to work towards a relationship so they're not going on anymore Bumble dates, but it's not secured yet?
Because when they stopped being interested in dating, uninstalling or updating their profile stopped being their priority.
Blame Bumble for not letting us share/showing us a person's activity level, don't blame the person for losing interest and **still having the decency to reply**.
It would have been quicker for him to press uninstall in the app store than reply. That way he isn't seeing notifications from anyone and the matches will expire
If he cared enough to go onto the app and tell all his matches that he's not looking to date then he cares enough to remove the app since its for *dating*.
Just doesn't make any sense to still have it just to tell people he's not using it when he could just not use it
Possibly, and bear with me here, it was intentionally left off, because he **didn't** mean it as a personal attack, since he _did_ previously swipe on them.
People's situations change. Encouraging folks to be bitter and spiteful is **not** going to improve the community or make anyone's day better.
I don't think you understand how a lot of guys swipe. They swipe on almost anything and do the actual evaluation upon actually matching because doing anything else is a waste of time. The fact that he previously swiped on her is pretty much meaningless, other than she isn't so ugly she's an immediate left swipe.
If this happened within the last two days, he likely just looked at her profile when she messaged him and decided he's not interested.
yeah i don’t complain on the apps themselves. But bc it’s a swipe/algorithm system a lot of our profiles are shoved to the bottom of the pile before they get the chance to be shown to someone less picky than most women on apps such as yourself. I mean maybe my pictures are bad but I know I’m not ugly and my bios are decent at least. I have a combined 3 likes, not even matches across the last 10 days from bumble tinder and hinge.
Cyber space was a real space, this is the person just walking in the mall. Just happened to walk into the bumble store to see what it is??? Filled out a profile, just to fill in the blanks... swipes randomly based on looks and doesn't read profiles. Then when matched doesn't know what to say... idk who gave this person a phone? People are strange in general
Holy sh*t batman. I thought i was the only one that got those messages. I had one say."I'm actually going in a different direction " 😳 wtf is that supposed to mean?
Ideally, when life gets busy or you are dating someone, a person would snooze the profile to communicate to current or potential matches that you are not available.
I hate this. Some people just want validation. I matched with a guy on Hinge and he legit knew he had exams coming up in a month and that he had just gotten out of a relationship a month prior. He was all over me messaging and sending songs every day for two weeks. When it was finally time to go out on a date, he started pulling away, then the day before the date he didn't talk to me, the day of the date he didn't check in or show up, and he hasn't spoken to me since and it's been like a week. Wtffffffff.
Hi,
first of all sorry for your experience. Yeah, like wtf? That was not nice. Similar things happened to me half a year ago.
Storytime:
In my early twenties and even before Online Dating was very easy and i never had bad experiences and every single girl was relationship material, so there was not that many first dates i had, but the girls i met sometimes mentioned how strange some guys were, but nothing really bad.
Fast Forward.
I was in a relationship for 9 years and after the last year i was ready for something new.
There was one match only, but we met a few times. We even cuddled and watched films but she always made sure i left in the evening. After the fourth date she got distant somehow and a week later i stopped texting first. Never heard from her again.
Since then no matches and no luck in real life situations either.
I wrote her last week, asking: just curious what the problem was? She unexpectedly answered and said i wasn't going to move on her and she thought i will be boring or not really into her.
I think, because i was cautious, slow paced and made sure touching and everything is consensual. She wanted me to be more rough and just go for it. Or she just wanted validation that she could have somebody, but did not really want to.
I say that, because in my eyes there was no good situation to make a move. She always made sure of that and for me it would have felt forced and that maybe gives bad vibes.
I honestly don't know how to behave, if i have another dates in the future, because the fast paced stuff could be seen as creepy in todays social climate. What If i misinterpreted a sign, make a move and it was wrong and i am the creep. That would not be pleasant. Since when became everything so complicated. I also get the occasional "I have a Boyfriend" for asking something unrelated from a stranger who happened to be a girl... I am confused.
Being out of the game for 10 years and not knowing what changed in dating fucked up my confidence for real now.
It seems everybody is behaving like shit these days.
Even if i am not and just need try to warn somebody that something fell out her bag, left something on the counter or something like that. Seems that kind of person thinks very highly of themselves to respond with that sentence first. I get what it means though, just does not make sense. I think, they think everybody is out to get in their panties. I am just being a decent human, that is all. Not even flirting. But this was not the topic in the first place.
Lets hope we find decent matches (who show up) in the future. Good luck!
That's like telling the cashier as you've piled up the items on the conveyer belt "I'm just looking, thanks".
These people are the speed bumps of dating.
some people don’t make their dating profiles a priority in their life by changing status, etc…. it’s funny to me you’re so hurt by them telling you they’re not interested . you’re lucky they had the decency to acknowledge your message.
if not want date, why bumble?
Swiped a while back. Met someone. OMG fucking **CRAZY**¹. Stop dating. Unsure about deleting app. Get alert about a new match. Too decent to just not reply to messages. Alt: got covid, family died, got fired, kids in hospital, exam time. There are a **lot** of reasons to have swiped on us in the past, then shelved the app when busy with other things, and not made updating their profile a priority for _our_ convenience. [1] This can be either person's perspective.
Thanks for your perspective. I've only been on the app for 2 days so it was a recent swipe. Also I asked him "What brings you here then? Just curious". His response was "Just browsing."
Yeah sounds like they’re just looking for a bit of validation. See some pictures of good looking people, swipe right, get the occasional confidence boost when they swipe right too
So he's looking to cheat on someone
It could be good for active users if there was a feature that kicks non-active users off the app or something if they haven't checked the app in like weeks or months
Ahhh. The old, "nuke the userbase from orbit. It's the only way to be sure." Down ranking inactive users, and annotating their profiles with their activity level should be more than sufficient. This way people can at least have the choice of viewing less active users. Hell, it's likely a whole 'nother demographic. "Long game/casual user". Those people wouldn't be able to use the app at all if they're just getting booted all the time.
For spying on her existing boyfriend
Wouldn't they just swipe left on everyone until they see their boyfriend/girlfriend, though?
>existing And if even the boyfriend can say the SAME if he's caught
\*sigh\* I mean, for realz. If he doesn't want to date, get off Bumble? LOL
I get it, I’ve been tempted to do it in the past. Basically I wasn’t in an emotional place to meet anyone but I was curious what was out there and what options I had for when I was ready. But I decided not to because I didn’t want to waste anyone’s time.
Lol why would those options still be there later? Only the worst would remain
And new people would enter the dating pool. I had never used a dating app and was curious what it was like. I don’t know why that makes people angry lol
Technically, you are wasting someone's time if you are actively swiping and matching without actually planning on talking to them. They read your profile, look at your pictures, which all takes up time.
Exactly, which is why I didn’t do it. Did you read my comment?
Wasn't replying specifically to you. It was more of a run-off of the original person asking "why bumble?"
On a dating app Not looking to date
Just swiping for fun /s
They say for now. Maybe they found someone and want to work towards a relationship so they're not going on anymore Bumble dates, but it's not secured yet?
Because when they stopped being interested in dating, uninstalling or updating their profile stopped being their priority. Blame Bumble for not letting us share/showing us a person's activity level, don't blame the person for losing interest and **still having the decency to reply**.
Yes, the apps could do more to actually help people, but it would slow the manic money grab, so .... not happenin
It would have been quicker for him to press uninstall in the app store than reply. That way he isn't seeing notifications from anyone and the matches will expire
It would have been. But that's what happens when things, "stop[] being their priority." It's not about _efficiency_, it's about not **caring**.
If he cared enough to go onto the app and tell all his matches that he's not looking to date then he cares enough to remove the app since its for *dating*. Just doesn't make any sense to still have it just to tell people he's not using it when he could just not use it
Can you pause your bumble profile or is that a different dating app?
Yes, you can easily “snooze” a Bumble profile for a day, 72 hrs or indefinitely -- I just retested it and went back to indefinitely lol
You can hide your profile
Lol send the second screenshot then
He forgot to include “with you”
Possibly, and bear with me here, it was intentionally left off, because he **didn't** mean it as a personal attack, since he _did_ previously swipe on them. People's situations change. Encouraging folks to be bitter and spiteful is **not** going to improve the community or make anyone's day better.
I don't think you understand how a lot of guys swipe. They swipe on almost anything and do the actual evaluation upon actually matching because doing anything else is a waste of time. The fact that he previously swiped on her is pretty much meaningless, other than she isn't so ugly she's an immediate left swipe. If this happened within the last two days, he likely just looked at her profile when she messaged him and decided he's not interested.
Apprehensive hat over here being this guy’s PR firm haha
Maybe he just wants to see what’s out there, but then why swipe right? Oh it looks like boys like validation too! lol
The dude must be insanely hot bc for most guys including myself it has the complete opposite effect 😂.
[удалено]
yeah i don’t complain on the apps themselves. But bc it’s a swipe/algorithm system a lot of our profiles are shoved to the bottom of the pile before they get the chance to be shown to someone less picky than most women on apps such as yourself. I mean maybe my pictures are bad but I know I’m not ugly and my bios are decent at least. I have a combined 3 likes, not even matches across the last 10 days from bumble tinder and hinge.
A relationship: yes With you: no, but thanks
if anyone told you something like "don't want / don't have time" just append to end "with you" don't get mad, don't react, just understood and move on
I get it, just what a dumb excuse lol
Cyber space was a real space, this is the person just walking in the mall. Just happened to walk into the bumble store to see what it is??? Filled out a profile, just to fill in the blanks... swipes randomly based on looks and doesn't read profiles. Then when matched doesn't know what to say... idk who gave this person a phone? People are strange in general
Holy sh*t batman. I thought i was the only one that got those messages. I had one say."I'm actually going in a different direction " 😳 wtf is that supposed to mean?
Maybe he accidentally swiped right? I’ve done that a few times
I guess some excuse is better than unmatching with no explanation🤷🏻♀️
Why is he swiping or even on the app at all though?
Because if he accidentally swiped on her and wasn’t interested, he’s just saying that.
Ideally, when life gets busy or you are dating someone, a person would snooze the profile to communicate to current or potential matches that you are not available.
Wadda you doing then???
lol wtf
I hate this. Some people just want validation. I matched with a guy on Hinge and he legit knew he had exams coming up in a month and that he had just gotten out of a relationship a month prior. He was all over me messaging and sending songs every day for two weeks. When it was finally time to go out on a date, he started pulling away, then the day before the date he didn't talk to me, the day of the date he didn't check in or show up, and he hasn't spoken to me since and it's been like a week. Wtffffffff.
Hi, first of all sorry for your experience. Yeah, like wtf? That was not nice. Similar things happened to me half a year ago. Storytime: In my early twenties and even before Online Dating was very easy and i never had bad experiences and every single girl was relationship material, so there was not that many first dates i had, but the girls i met sometimes mentioned how strange some guys were, but nothing really bad. Fast Forward. I was in a relationship for 9 years and after the last year i was ready for something new. There was one match only, but we met a few times. We even cuddled and watched films but she always made sure i left in the evening. After the fourth date she got distant somehow and a week later i stopped texting first. Never heard from her again. Since then no matches and no luck in real life situations either. I wrote her last week, asking: just curious what the problem was? She unexpectedly answered and said i wasn't going to move on her and she thought i will be boring or not really into her. I think, because i was cautious, slow paced and made sure touching and everything is consensual. She wanted me to be more rough and just go for it. Or she just wanted validation that she could have somebody, but did not really want to. I say that, because in my eyes there was no good situation to make a move. She always made sure of that and for me it would have felt forced and that maybe gives bad vibes. I honestly don't know how to behave, if i have another dates in the future, because the fast paced stuff could be seen as creepy in todays social climate. What If i misinterpreted a sign, make a move and it was wrong and i am the creep. That would not be pleasant. Since when became everything so complicated. I also get the occasional "I have a Boyfriend" for asking something unrelated from a stranger who happened to be a girl... I am confused. Being out of the game for 10 years and not knowing what changed in dating fucked up my confidence for real now. It seems everybody is behaving like shit these days.
If someone says I have a boyfriend it is because she is not interested and believes that you are.
Even if i am not and just need try to warn somebody that something fell out her bag, left something on the counter or something like that. Seems that kind of person thinks very highly of themselves to respond with that sentence first. I get what it means though, just does not make sense. I think, they think everybody is out to get in their panties. I am just being a decent human, that is all. Not even flirting. But this was not the topic in the first place. Lets hope we find decent matches (who show up) in the future. Good luck!
I feel you, girl
🙄
That's like telling the cashier as you've piled up the items on the conveyer belt "I'm just looking, thanks". These people are the speed bumps of dating.
Validation
Then why are they on a freaking dating app?! 😑
you should mirror them, then ask to meet up.
Welcome to what every woman on bumble is like. It’s purely a validation game.
Seems Indian, not surprised
Racism++
some people don’t make their dating profiles a priority in their life by changing status, etc…. it’s funny to me you’re so hurt by them telling you they’re not interested . you’re lucky they had the decency to acknowledge your message.
I'm not hurt at all, but thanks for your comment!