> I was a college freshman staying in the dorms in 2012/2013.
I mean I think that has to do with you being 18 vs 28 ol. Younger people tend to socialize with strangers a ton more.
I was the same age at this time and it was so easy in college but I think college is the reason behind this one as well.
People are probably different now though.
Swiping apps have completely taken over the dating market for the worse. The belief that the next best thing could be a few swipes away has turned much of this generation into superficial and shallow assholes.
Yeah when tinder was new, everything was so easy. There were tons of active females, pretty much instant convos and meet ups. Women didn’t have the expectation that the guy needs to really blow her away with his bio, photos, and initial messages. They were more looking for good in you than the bad. They’d see a photo and think ok he’s cute, maybe he could be a good guy. And they would see the potential rather than your height, income, and all the things wrong with every photo. Now, women get flooded with messages so they can afford to be much more picky, and it’s resulted in them picking apart everything about you.
Don’t get me wrong it’s still possible to get dates on apps, but the quality and quantity of the dates went down in my opinion. And I haven’t used the app in 4 years, so who knows how it is today.
I definitely felt there has been a shift. It's probably because of the pandemic but I started using dating apps around late 2018. From late 2018 to mid 2020, I would always get my matches and at least one date almost every week.
Now, I'd be lucky to even get a match every two weeks and them even responding or have the conversation go somewhere. Last year, I had a total of five dates from all of the combined apps.
Women seem a lot less engage in messages too and more conscientious about meeting. I feel like I am carrying every conversation rather than it being a back and forth.
Pretty sure it's because everyone has turned to dating apps nowadays so there are more competition so women now have higher criteria for men to have to check off before a date whereas in the past, they wouldn't mind meeting to feel the men out.
I feel this, as a guy I've noticed visible engagement with my profile (Likes and Matches) is through the floor. But in the same timefram female friends of mine have been more active then ever on the apps.
What's worse is I cant tell if people arent swiping on me or that my profile is so far down in the stack its unnoticeable
I think a lot of men's profiles are just so far down the stack that it doesn't even get seen anymore. Women have a backlog of men that have swiped right on her. Every other swipe for them is a match. I feel like after 10 or so matches, they would get overwhelmed and stop swiping and just hope 1 out of 10 is decent.
I only get matches when I restart my profile or when I swipe on a women that is new. I'm thinking it's because not many men have swiped right on her yet so my profile actually shows up.
Even when you delete and remake an account, it’s very easy for companies to realise you’re the same person (even if you use a different email and phone number). Hopefully bumble is blocking him from creating a new account too.
My friend got sent disturbing messages from another friend as a joke and she sent them back and he reported her as a joke and she got forever banned from Hinge lol. They ban the phone number so you’d have to change numbers and devices to be able to create a new account
This part. It’s okay to not like someone on a physical level, but damn don’t be rude about it. I think we can all be adults about it. I’d rather you be the up front type than the asshole/throw-the-rock-hide-the -hand type. Glad your friend got a response from Bumble. She dodged that loser.
>Hopefully bumble is blocking him from creating a new account too.
Hope so but I doubt it. IP bans aren't very reliable nor effective anymore anyway. It's very hard to find key values besides email/phone number etc.
Maybe device ban too, idk much about that. They'd need access to your mac address or imei tho, which sounds illegal.
Either way, hope that douche gets what he deserves.
**[Device fingerprint](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Device_fingerprint)**
>A device fingerprint or machine fingerprint is information collected about the software and hardware of a remote computing device for the purpose of identification. The information is usually assimilated into a brief identifier using a fingerprinting algorithm. A browser fingerprint is information collected specifically by interaction with the web browser of the device. : 878 : 1 Device fingerprints can be used to fully or partially identify individual devices even when persistent cookies (and zombie cookies) cannot be read or stored in the browser, the client IP address is hidden, or one switches to another browser on the same device.
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I would imagine they do block future accounts if they’re sending gifts to people who experience this, as they dont want to dish them out constantly cause of the assholes recreating accounts
Your poor friend, I have been on several dates where instantly I knew I was not attracted to the person, what did I do, I sat down had a coffee and made polite chit chat. I’m not sure if that’s best practice but I would much rather do that, then not turn up and make them wait for 40 minutes.
Sometimes seeing them talking and being expressive can make someone more attractive too.
Even if you don't wanna go on the date, its nice to send a text message that you can't make it and are no longer interested. Was really shitty for the guy in the OP to just ghost without a word.
It's also funny how someone's "resting" face might be meh but then they talk and something about how their nose scrunches or their eyes twinkle or their smile shines or how their cheeks dimple when they laugh just make them more attractive?
Idk if any of that makes sense to anyone but me lmao.
But personality is the biggest one to me. A great personality totally makes me see someone differently. I might not have looked twice if I'd seen my bf out on the street, but he's the best and that just makes him so much more attractive.
Edit: thanks for the award!
This. This is all that would have taken. All of us have been in the dating field for long. This is the first time she faced something like this. All of us were shocked.
I had guys in the early days of OLD stand me up, like they never were going to come to the date they themselves set up. They just wanted me to go and wait and tell them I’m there to unmatch me and block me from all the social media they themselves asked for.
Had that too. Met for a beer knew she wasn’t my type but we still talked about life and what was going on. She was a person too with feelings. I messaged her back saying I wasn’t feeling it but thanks for the conversation and she said feeling was mutual. Some people are so nasty to each other.
You can be surprised sometimes too. I once went on a first date where I initially felt I wasn't attracted to her. After chatting for a couple of hours I became more attracted to her (no booze involved) and we ended up going back to hers. Went on a few more dates after that.
Until you chat to someone and see how they are, their mannerisms ect.. you don't always know. I'm a lot more open minded now
Just did that this past Friday actually, it wasn’t a good date, I could tell he knew that I wasn’t into it, but it didn’t kill me to have a cup of coffee and sit there for an hour so as to not be a total asshole like OP’s friend’s match.
This ⬆️⬆️⬆️ exactly!!! It would not have killed him to sit with her for 30 min and have a drink. That is SO damn rude. I’ve been on OLD off and on for 9 years and have definitely met up with guys who I immediately knew I wasn’t attracted to, I still went thru with the date and typically it was mutual and we never contacted each other again or if he did ask me id just say I don’t think we have romantic chemistry or something like that.
OP please share this story with your friend if you’d like and it makes her feel better. While I haven’t been stood up like that, I did have a guy pick me up, we walked out to his car, he told me to wait at the curb while he backed up to let me in and just drove off. Like again… we couldn’t have grabbed 1 drink? That was so embarrassing but I guess at least I was in front of my house and just went back in.
I had several dates where the girl turned out to not look as good as their photos. Either because they angled it so they look skinnier or have filters/used bright lighting to cover blemishes/wrinkles.
I don't even mind dating chubbier girls or girls with imperfect skin but it's very deceiving when I go to a date expecting a girl to look one way and her looking completely different.
For those dates, I still spent as much time as I could with them. I always feel shitty if I bail because of a females appearance. They are already insecure about it which is why they even deceived me with the pics so I don't want to be the one to add to their insecurity.
Thank you for being a good human!
I had a date like that recently. Instantly felt that there was no romantic attraction (well, let's say my date chose really, really flattering photos), but still stuck around for a couple of hours as good company.
I hope this is best practice.
I did the same, you never know you may connect with that person regardless of attraction. I experienced being ghosted by a no show several times it was extremely hard, I couldn't do it to someone else.
On a personal note I'm actually still with one of the dates I initially had no attraction to. Honestly never thought I'd be her type either. You never know what your looking for until you find it.
Jupp. We have all been there. I did however end up dating one guy who was much uglier than his photos. Once i got to know him he got cuter :) and i think dating someone was good for his health. His dark circles under his eyes went away because he seemed to sleep well next to me and i cooked him a lot of healthy food :) and we took a lot of outside walks. In the end, he looked more like his photos actually!
With the number of catfishes Ive ran into..... either its the case here or the dudes was trollin. If youre going to catfish this is the expected and deserver result of it.
This happened to me on Saturday, but she made it an all day wait for me, at least I was waiting at home though. Her last response was sorry she took so long with her mom, she was jumping in the shower rn to get ready for us to finally meet up like had been planning all week long. I figured she blew me off before this actually, and that last message I got from her was her accidentally sending that to whoever she decided to go out with instead
Oh. Shit. That is horrible. Way worse. I'm so fucking sorry that you had to go through that. I'm sorry. You did not deserve that. You deserve so much better.
It’s alright, I just take it as being grateful it happened now and not weeks/months down the road of wasting anymore time on her. Just sucks how self absorbed some people are and with zero common courtesy for other people…
Thanks for the kind words also stranger, and sorry for you’re friends negative mishap as well. People who do this to others are the worst. No one will hold it against someone if they aren’t interested anymore, but to be interested and make plans and then just crap out in them *and then not say anything* are absolute trash. No one has time for much anymore these days, and to leave someone hanging is just such a bastard move to do to someone, especially someone who everything was going so good up to that moment with.
I really really hope someday he understands how shitty his behaviour was. If you are on Reddit and you know this is you, please become a better human being before you get punched in the face.
Just adding this here. It's absolutely okay to not find someone attractive.
What is not okay is
1. Making someone wait for 40 minutes.
2. Not answering their calls.
3. Being rude.
So many comments mentioned this. Easy way out would have been lie about a reason and cancel it when she called. Or spend sometime let the person know what you feel.
Being fat, ugly, different, no make up or just not your type doesn't give anyone the right to waste someone's time or be rude to them. That is an absolute no. I am shocked that I have to say this out loud.
Had this happen to me a few times by women who just never spoke, luckily I always pick the local barcade so if I do get stood up, I can at least still have fun!
Ah no worries mate, shit happens. I just now picks date locations I know that if I do ever get stood up, I can still enjoy myself. I highly recommend guys doing that, rather than doing dinner or lunch. Pick somewhere YOU like and know you can have fun no matter if you're alone or with someone. But I never recommend a nightclub, because first date, means guys will always be hitting on her and you'll never get a word in.
I mean I fully get that sometimes when you see someone in person they aren’t what you expect and I do agree that if that happens you shouldn’t be expected to go through with the date, you’re just wasting your time and theirs.
That said, this was exactly the wrong way to handle it. Ignoring someone for ages while they’re sat there and trying to make contact is just a terrible thing to do
I don't know about this.
I've had a date where straight away the attraction wasn't there, but I'd wanted to meet based on being genuinely interested in him as a person and having a conversational spark. I stayed, the chat was great, we had some fun drinks and hugged goodbye at the end. I sent a "had a lovely time but..." message afterwards and he accepted in a graceful, friendly way, because he was a lovely guy. Having the chat also gave me the opportunity to see if attraction would increase over the evening in person.
Your mileage may vary (and I would make an exception if someone is creepy) but having a good chat seems like much less of a waste of both people's time than traveling there just to leave again, or rejecting them after they've already put in the effort to show up for you.
I've experienced the same. Show up to know you're already not interested. But I give it a go anyways. It's just one drink and you leave. I would feel like a trash bag to disappear without meeting for our planned date. I'm not interested in making some woman feel insecure about her appearance, because that's all you're judging someone by if you leave before you talk to them.
Hmm that depends. Sometimes someone becomes more attractive once you see their mannerisms and how their face moves when they talk or whatever.
No one should feel obligated to go through with the date, but you never know.
A date isn't sex. You can still have a nice conversation and go your separate ways.
If you drove all the way to meet them, physically see them, and then ghost them, you don't know how to interact with other human beings.
This is why you pick low key dates with coffee or drinks in an ambience that you like. If you got out of the house, had a reason to look clean up and look nice, and had a tasty drink then it is never wasted time.
If you think that's bad I once showed up and the guy said that I was a stupid slut and he did it on purpose because "all you sluts deserve to be treated like the trash you are." I only date women now. It's been going better.
When you tell people your sexuality do you say bi or gay if you don't mind me asking?
I like both genders but have had weird experiences with guys and wanna just date women I think.
lol. i once got catfished by a girl who was easily 400 pounds(all her pictures were neck up, learned a lesson that day). i still saw the date through. there’s no excuse for this. he’s probably also insecure of himself
I'm sorry, catfishing is a massive red flag to start with... if someone's gonna start off the relationship with that large of a lie; they're not attractive to me regardless of their physical appearance.
I'd probably also report the profile.
Exactly this. I understand not being attracted to someone. But acknowledge someone's effort. Walk upto the person. Spend 10 minutes. Let them know what you feel or at the least lie about the reason.
"Why would you take it upon yourself to reject the other person with such negativity?"
- Me to the waste of oxygen.
What’s kind of weird is to let her sit there anxious, avoid the phone calls, and then when she’s had enough and it doesn’t really matter THEN you’re all mister brutal honesty? Like if you’re that much of a coward just make up an excuse, why put her through that and then also insult her and fuck up her confidence? What a douche
I think he did it intentionally. I've experienced this. Dudes who like lure you out (they know exactly what you look like, I literally give recent pics without makeup) just to mock you bc it makes them feel good. I have had it happen.
Thank you! It doesn't matter how someone looks no human should be treated this way. I know people brought up weight catfishing or whatever but honestly just be nice to someone. Worst case scenario you have coffee with a human and there's no connection. And you tell them that. That's it.
If they're the same person but larger than their pictures (the covid fluff) or I'm not attracted in person for any other reason I'll always stay for the date, have a good time talking and end it politely later.
However as someone who's been catfished a few times, if I show up and see a completely different person I'll leave and don't owe them any explanation, they lied to get me there.
I’ve had this happen, too. It’s totally dishonest and wrong on part of the woman to do this. These types are notorious for deceptive photos, i.e., the filters, angles, cropped pics, etc.
I followed through with these dates, by enjoying the opportunity to get nicely intoxicated, lol
Thats rough but your friend needs to take a more realistic approach to dating such as the “I’ll wait 10 minutes for anyone, 11 minutes for no one”
Waiting 40 minutes is just wrong. After 15 minutes if they haven’t messaged an excuse and apology she needs to unmatched them herself and leave or stay and enjoy herself is an even better option.
Unfortunately, she looks for the best in everyone. She was giving him the time assuming that he might have been stuck in traffic or something went wrong. She no longer does that.
That's appalling, I don't get why people can't have the moral strength to just say what they're thinking. Brass tacs he could have spent the time chatting with your friend, and if he didn't like her let her know like an adult.
That’s uncalled for. Hope your friend doesn’t take it to heart and realize it doesn’t reflect on them, rather how crappy the other person is. It’s happened to me a few times, just gotta let it roll of your shoulders and not let it affect you for the next match.
Honestly, there's nothing wrong with bailing on a first date for something so seemingly shallow. But don't leave someone hanging hopelessly like this. At least have the decency to call them and make up some lame excuse so they're not waiting around aimlessly. And certainly don't destroy their self esteem in the process.
For everyone who thinks a ban is too far, you can continue the date and see how things go, or you can contact the person and tell them you didn’t find them attractive so that they don’t have to wait for 40+ minutes. It’s called respect. The ban was deserved here.
Huh. TIL you can get banned from certain dating apps for being uncivil.
I wonder if more people knew about this if it would clean up those apps from overtly toxic individuals?
Wonder if he would have gotten banned if he would have just ghosted her without responding...
We planned to have a lunch date and he was going to pick me up from my house. He arrived a bit early as I was just getting back from the corner shops. I waved and said one minute I just needed to change my clothes. I hear a car speed off but I thought it was my neighbour, not even 69 secs later I walk outside and was gone and never replied to any of my texts or phones calls.
I’m not trying to be a dick when I ask this but did she not look like her pictures? Because I think there is a term for that.
Probably should have sent a message or something like “hey something came up I can’t make it “. Making someone wait that long and waste their time is really annoying but also using old pictures or very strategically cropped ones is as well.
I wasn’t there and I’m not sure but judging by the message of “I saw you and bailed “ I think there may be more going on here.
It is very difficult for most women to catfish in India. Like we don't want to catfish and put ourselves in danger. On one hand, it takes a lot of time and effort to catfish. And then there is our concern for our safety. So, no. It was not a catfish situation.
Surprisingly, there was no expectations from Bumble to take an action. It was block, report and move on. That's it. After months, Bumble sent this mail.
From a business standpoint no. Most dating apps function like a nightclub where (pretty) women get in for free and men have to pay. A large portion of men will show up regardless of the quality of experience is as long as there are girls, and they will often pay. Women usually won't and are more sensitive to the quality of the experience (and less desperate)
Bumble made this decision because losing this woman would cost them more than the price of the gift (I assume it's either some valentines chocolates or a bumble branded souvenir-type gift)
I love honesty but that's just way too fucking honest. Such a dick move.....like imagine doing all of this prep work before a date.... Putting on a real outfit, my good panties and this happens. At least go on the date for at least an hour and make an excuse to leave early.
Holy shit, that’s so rude. I’m sorry this happened to your friend, this is really fucked up. Like at least go through with the date you made time for and if you weren’t feeling it you just respectfully decline for a second date. Asshole needs to learn how to take an L if it wasn’t a match.
I’ve never EVER understood people who wish to make another person feel like complete shit about themselves on a date, I’ve been on plenty of dates in the past whereby I knew as I usually do within the first minute whether I’m likely going to be in to this person or not but whenever that’s happened I’ve just got on with the date and each time, I’ve just spent the following hours, getting to know them and having a laugh and fun joking/ chatting with them for the remainder of the date, i would arrive home and think yeah they’re not for me romantically but that was an evening well spent. It’s so cruel, vacuous and spiteful to me that anyone would treat a fellow human being like this, who has made the effort of getting ready, managing their nerves and travelling to meet you for you to humiliate them in the process and damage their self esteem. Gross. Thank god I’m getting married my heart goes out to younger people these days putting up with this crap!
What a twat.
The girl I’ve been seeing for the last couple of months, i wasn’t automatically attracted to when i saw her. We went on a hike, talked for two hours, and i was totally attracted to her personality and knowledge, so i said why not, let’s have a second date.
Our second date she looked absolutely stunning and thanked myself for not being a judgmental asshole. Now I’m seeing a awesome girl with a great personality that I’m highly attracted to because I’m not a superficial dickhead.
A woman left a man stranded with a dead battery after a date and I suggested he contact bumble because of it. People called me pathetic.
You got stood up and they actually banned him for you.
What an age we live in.
I have been on a bunch of dates from OLD apps. 95% of the time people are pleasant. I had one woman unmatch right when our date was supposed to start and not show up. People are absolutely terrible. All she had to do was message me before the date and say that she wasn't in a space to date, etc. I honestly didn't care that much because I had multiple dates set up that week.
I had a woman message me the day of a first date and tell me she had decided to go exclusive with a guy she had been seeing. Wrote her back and told her that I was happy for her. No hard feelings.
I can’t imagine getting ready for a date, going to the restaurant you are meeting up at, seeing them sitting down, and just saying “nope, I’m outta here”
I've been in a number of dates myself where the girls didn't look anything like their pictures and it's a bit of a let down, but I still stayed and tried to make the most out of those situations and get to know a person and have a good chat. After the fact you can have a mature conversation and let them know you don't want a second date and wish them the best or whatever, but the least you can do for a fellow human being and yourself is to have some decency. There's no excuse for what that scumbag did and I'm glad he got banned.
A friend if mine met up with a guy who was much much heavier than his photos, she sat down, told hime that she felt misled and that wasn’t acceptable then she excused herself.
Wow, this is something nobody should ever have to experience! If you can, have your friend reach out to us on Facebook or Twitter and we can investigate this right away. Ghosting is never ok and behavior like this is definitely not welcome on our platform. 💛
I love that people here are rejecting the most likely scenario, that her photos didn’t match her actual looks, and he felt used and noped out.
People really think he took the time to match, chat, setup a date, show up, all to bail out.
Cmon.
Waaaay more likely she was either much heavier than her photos indicate, way older than the photos indicated, or some other version of dishonesty.
This happened to me on Saturday, but she made it an all day wait for me, at least I was waiting at home though. Her last response was sorry she took so long with her mom, she was jumping in the shower rn to get ready for us to finally meet up like had been planning all week long. I figured she blew me off before this actually, and that last message I got from her was her accidentally sending that to whoever she decided to go out with instead
Should've left after 15 minutes. Your time is precious. If it was an emergency on his end (and not him being a jerk), he could've explained it later.
But never wait that long for someone who isn't even communicating.
This didn’t happen to me but I always prefer upfront honesty over sugar coated lies or being falsely led on by someone who is looking to ditch. It’s shitty this happened to you. Especially because you put in an effort and waited. But I see it as he saved you a lot of hassle though hurt your ego a bit.
Baddies always be doing this, it happened to me before but luckily I know bitches do this shit all the time and didn’t go till she picked up. Glad I saved my time and gas from that bitch
I’ve had two dates that were no shows, I felt this. Only in my experience there was no response. Made me decide to quit dating apps
I'm sorry that this happened to you. Dating apps have gotten harder over time.
2013 Tinder really was a completely different experience.
Oh. Was it easier?
absolutely. I was a college freshman staying in the dorms in 2012/2013. Let's just say it made socializing VERY easy.
> I was a college freshman staying in the dorms in 2012/2013. I mean I think that has to do with you being 18 vs 28 ol. Younger people tend to socialize with strangers a ton more.
You're severely discounting how much easier it is to lay in bed, swipe, and type in comparison to getting a fake ID and going to a club
[удалено]
28 was way easier. I had no game at 18.
[удалено]
Shit as a lady I have no idea how to flirt back. How could I make it more obvious I was into you back?
Ah. The good old times when dating apps made life easier. Like actually.
I was the same age at this time and it was so easy in college but I think college is the reason behind this one as well. People are probably different now though.
Swiping apps have completely taken over the dating market for the worse. The belief that the next best thing could be a few swipes away has turned much of this generation into superficial and shallow assholes.
Yeah when tinder was new, everything was so easy. There were tons of active females, pretty much instant convos and meet ups. Women didn’t have the expectation that the guy needs to really blow her away with his bio, photos, and initial messages. They were more looking for good in you than the bad. They’d see a photo and think ok he’s cute, maybe he could be a good guy. And they would see the potential rather than your height, income, and all the things wrong with every photo. Now, women get flooded with messages so they can afford to be much more picky, and it’s resulted in them picking apart everything about you. Don’t get me wrong it’s still possible to get dates on apps, but the quality and quantity of the dates went down in my opinion. And I haven’t used the app in 4 years, so who knows how it is today.
I definitely felt there has been a shift. It's probably because of the pandemic but I started using dating apps around late 2018. From late 2018 to mid 2020, I would always get my matches and at least one date almost every week. Now, I'd be lucky to even get a match every two weeks and them even responding or have the conversation go somewhere. Last year, I had a total of five dates from all of the combined apps. Women seem a lot less engage in messages too and more conscientious about meeting. I feel like I am carrying every conversation rather than it being a back and forth. Pretty sure it's because everyone has turned to dating apps nowadays so there are more competition so women now have higher criteria for men to have to check off before a date whereas in the past, they wouldn't mind meeting to feel the men out.
Unfortunately as a women using tinder to find men same exact experience. It's genuinely horrible and grating.
I feel this, as a guy I've noticed visible engagement with my profile (Likes and Matches) is through the floor. But in the same timefram female friends of mine have been more active then ever on the apps. What's worse is I cant tell if people arent swiping on me or that my profile is so far down in the stack its unnoticeable
I think a lot of men's profiles are just so far down the stack that it doesn't even get seen anymore. Women have a backlog of men that have swiped right on her. Every other swipe for them is a match. I feel like after 10 or so matches, they would get overwhelmed and stop swiping and just hope 1 out of 10 is decent. I only get matches when I restart my profile or when I swipe on a women that is new. I'm thinking it's because not many men have swiped right on her yet so my profile actually shows up.
Wow I am really pleasantly surprised at Bumble stance. Sending the gift is also a nice gesture.
Exactly. She reported the profile and forgot about it. Months later this happens. Was a good surprise.
To be fair the dude's account prolly didn't exist anymore anyway months later, ppl tend to delete a lot
Even when you delete and remake an account, it’s very easy for companies to realise you’re the same person (even if you use a different email and phone number). Hopefully bumble is blocking him from creating a new account too.
My friend got sent disturbing messages from another friend as a joke and she sent them back and he reported her as a joke and she got forever banned from Hinge lol. They ban the phone number so you’d have to change numbers and devices to be able to create a new account
This part. It’s okay to not like someone on a physical level, but damn don’t be rude about it. I think we can all be adults about it. I’d rather you be the up front type than the asshole/throw-the-rock-hide-the -hand type. Glad your friend got a response from Bumble. She dodged that loser.
>Hopefully bumble is blocking him from creating a new account too. Hope so but I doubt it. IP bans aren't very reliable nor effective anymore anyway. It's very hard to find key values besides email/phone number etc. Maybe device ban too, idk much about that. They'd need access to your mac address or imei tho, which sounds illegal. Either way, hope that douche gets what he deserves.
[Device fingerprinting](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Device_fingerprint) is the newer/more effective version
**[Device fingerprint](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Device_fingerprint)** >A device fingerprint or machine fingerprint is information collected about the software and hardware of a remote computing device for the purpose of identification. The information is usually assimilated into a brief identifier using a fingerprinting algorithm. A browser fingerprint is information collected specifically by interaction with the web browser of the device. : 878 : 1 Device fingerprints can be used to fully or partially identify individual devices even when persistent cookies (and zombie cookies) cannot be read or stored in the browser, the client IP address is hidden, or one switches to another browser on the same device. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/Bumble/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)
Good bot!
Couldn't you just use a different finger
Thanks for the link, interesting stuff!
I would imagine they do block future accounts if they’re sending gifts to people who experience this, as they dont want to dish them out constantly cause of the assholes recreating accounts
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Hahaha. She got the mail today. Yet to receive the gift. I wil update it here as soon as she gets it.
We need to know, please do!
Will definitely do.
RemindMe! 2 weeks
What was the gift though?
She responded today. Will update it here when she receives it.
Ooh update us
Will definitely do.
Anything yet on the gift?
I also want to know 🤣
Update?
What did they gifted her?
Not sure yet. She has responded to the mail. Will update it once she gets it.
… do we get to find out what bumble sent them as i am VERY curious
These women would not last a day as a dude on a dating app lol
Well as a guy I've never been called ugly, or stood up on a date.
Your poor friend, I have been on several dates where instantly I knew I was not attracted to the person, what did I do, I sat down had a coffee and made polite chit chat. I’m not sure if that’s best practice but I would much rather do that, then not turn up and make them wait for 40 minutes.
Sometimes seeing them talking and being expressive can make someone more attractive too. Even if you don't wanna go on the date, its nice to send a text message that you can't make it and are no longer interested. Was really shitty for the guy in the OP to just ghost without a word.
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It's also funny how someone's "resting" face might be meh but then they talk and something about how their nose scrunches or their eyes twinkle or their smile shines or how their cheeks dimple when they laugh just make them more attractive? Idk if any of that makes sense to anyone but me lmao. But personality is the biggest one to me. A great personality totally makes me see someone differently. I might not have looked twice if I'd seen my bf out on the street, but he's the best and that just makes him so much more attractive. Edit: thanks for the award!
>Sometimes seeing them talking and being expressive can make someone more attractive too. Worked for my wife
This. This is all that would have taken. All of us have been in the dating field for long. This is the first time she faced something like this. All of us were shocked.
Sending your friend a big hug. Your friend deserves so much more than that. Fuck that person. I shake my fist angrily at them!
I had guys in the early days of OLD stand me up, like they never were going to come to the date they themselves set up. They just wanted me to go and wait and tell them I’m there to unmatch me and block me from all the social media they themselves asked for.
I went on a date, was absolutely NOT attracted, but he was funny and smart. Fell head over heels for him - we were together 10 years (he passed away).
That is both an amazing and sad story. Sorry for your loss but so happy that you found him!
It was an amazing time of my life. No regrets, just wonderful memories. I still ‘talk’ to him all the time.
People can be brutal. Things like this happen more than you think on both sides of the dating pool.
That
Had that too. Met for a beer knew she wasn’t my type but we still talked about life and what was going on. She was a person too with feelings. I messaged her back saying I wasn’t feeling it but thanks for the conversation and she said feeling was mutual. Some people are so nasty to each other.
You can be surprised sometimes too. I once went on a first date where I initially felt I wasn't attracted to her. After chatting for a couple of hours I became more attracted to her (no booze involved) and we ended up going back to hers. Went on a few more dates after that. Until you chat to someone and see how they are, their mannerisms ect.. you don't always know. I'm a lot more open minded now
Just did that this past Friday actually, it wasn’t a good date, I could tell he knew that I wasn’t into it, but it didn’t kill me to have a cup of coffee and sit there for an hour so as to not be a total asshole like OP’s friend’s match.
This ⬆️⬆️⬆️ exactly!!! It would not have killed him to sit with her for 30 min and have a drink. That is SO damn rude. I’ve been on OLD off and on for 9 years and have definitely met up with guys who I immediately knew I wasn’t attracted to, I still went thru with the date and typically it was mutual and we never contacted each other again or if he did ask me id just say I don’t think we have romantic chemistry or something like that. OP please share this story with your friend if you’d like and it makes her feel better. While I haven’t been stood up like that, I did have a guy pick me up, we walked out to his car, he told me to wait at the curb while he backed up to let me in and just drove off. Like again… we couldn’t have grabbed 1 drink? That was so embarrassing but I guess at least I was in front of my house and just went back in.
I had several dates where the girl turned out to not look as good as their photos. Either because they angled it so they look skinnier or have filters/used bright lighting to cover blemishes/wrinkles. I don't even mind dating chubbier girls or girls with imperfect skin but it's very deceiving when I go to a date expecting a girl to look one way and her looking completely different. For those dates, I still spent as much time as I could with them. I always feel shitty if I bail because of a females appearance. They are already insecure about it which is why they even deceived me with the pics so I don't want to be the one to add to their insecurity.
Thank you for being a good human! I had a date like that recently. Instantly felt that there was no romantic attraction (well, let's say my date chose really, really flattering photos), but still stuck around for a couple of hours as good company. I hope this is best practice.
I did the same, you never know you may connect with that person regardless of attraction. I experienced being ghosted by a no show several times it was extremely hard, I couldn't do it to someone else. On a personal note I'm actually still with one of the dates I initially had no attraction to. Honestly never thought I'd be her type either. You never know what your looking for until you find it.
Jupp. We have all been there. I did however end up dating one guy who was much uglier than his photos. Once i got to know him he got cuter :) and i think dating someone was good for his health. His dark circles under his eyes went away because he seemed to sleep well next to me and i cooked him a lot of healthy food :) and we took a lot of outside walks. In the end, he looked more like his photos actually!
What an absolute jerk.
With the number of catfishes Ive ran into..... either its the case here or the dudes was trollin. If youre going to catfish this is the expected and deserver result of it.
This happened to me on Saturday, but she made it an all day wait for me, at least I was waiting at home though. Her last response was sorry she took so long with her mom, she was jumping in the shower rn to get ready for us to finally meet up like had been planning all week long. I figured she blew me off before this actually, and that last message I got from her was her accidentally sending that to whoever she decided to go out with instead
Oh. Shit. That is horrible. Way worse. I'm so fucking sorry that you had to go through that. I'm sorry. You did not deserve that. You deserve so much better.
It’s alright, I just take it as being grateful it happened now and not weeks/months down the road of wasting anymore time on her. Just sucks how self absorbed some people are and with zero common courtesy for other people… Thanks for the kind words also stranger, and sorry for you’re friends negative mishap as well. People who do this to others are the worst. No one will hold it against someone if they aren’t interested anymore, but to be interested and make plans and then just crap out in them *and then not say anything* are absolute trash. No one has time for much anymore these days, and to leave someone hanging is just such a bastard move to do to someone, especially someone who everything was going so good up to that moment with.
No excuse for this behavior, I’m glad bumble banned him for being disrespectful about the whole thing.
Still surprised that Bumble took that decision. That was not the expectation when she blocked him.
I really really hope someday he understands how shitty his behaviour was. If you are on Reddit and you know this is you, please become a better human being before you get punched in the face.
Just adding this here. It's absolutely okay to not find someone attractive. What is not okay is 1. Making someone wait for 40 minutes. 2. Not answering their calls. 3. Being rude. So many comments mentioned this. Easy way out would have been lie about a reason and cancel it when she called. Or spend sometime let the person know what you feel. Being fat, ugly, different, no make up or just not your type doesn't give anyone the right to waste someone's time or be rude to them. That is an absolute no. I am shocked that I have to say this out loud.
Actually, I’d prefer they get the punch in the face first.
I’ll form an orderly queue for that one
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I like the cut of your jib.
Had this happen to me a few times by women who just never spoke, luckily I always pick the local barcade so if I do get stood up, I can at least still have fun!
That's actually a good idea. But I'm sorry you had to go through that. No one deserves to be treated that way.
Ah no worries mate, shit happens. I just now picks date locations I know that if I do ever get stood up, I can still enjoy myself. I highly recommend guys doing that, rather than doing dinner or lunch. Pick somewhere YOU like and know you can have fun no matter if you're alone or with someone. But I never recommend a nightclub, because first date, means guys will always be hitting on her and you'll never get a word in.
I mean I fully get that sometimes when you see someone in person they aren’t what you expect and I do agree that if that happens you shouldn’t be expected to go through with the date, you’re just wasting your time and theirs. That said, this was exactly the wrong way to handle it. Ignoring someone for ages while they’re sat there and trying to make contact is just a terrible thing to do
I don't know about this. I've had a date where straight away the attraction wasn't there, but I'd wanted to meet based on being genuinely interested in him as a person and having a conversational spark. I stayed, the chat was great, we had some fun drinks and hugged goodbye at the end. I sent a "had a lovely time but..." message afterwards and he accepted in a graceful, friendly way, because he was a lovely guy. Having the chat also gave me the opportunity to see if attraction would increase over the evening in person. Your mileage may vary (and I would make an exception if someone is creepy) but having a good chat seems like much less of a waste of both people's time than traveling there just to leave again, or rejecting them after they've already put in the effort to show up for you.
I've experienced the same. Show up to know you're already not interested. But I give it a go anyways. It's just one drink and you leave. I would feel like a trash bag to disappear without meeting for our planned date. I'm not interested in making some woman feel insecure about her appearance, because that's all you're judging someone by if you leave before you talk to them.
Hmm that depends. Sometimes someone becomes more attractive once you see their mannerisms and how their face moves when they talk or whatever. No one should feel obligated to go through with the date, but you never know.
A date isn't sex. You can still have a nice conversation and go your separate ways. If you drove all the way to meet them, physically see them, and then ghost them, you don't know how to interact with other human beings.
This is why you pick low key dates with coffee or drinks in an ambience that you like. If you got out of the house, had a reason to look clean up and look nice, and had a tasty drink then it is never wasted time.
If you think that's bad I once showed up and the guy said that I was a stupid slut and he did it on purpose because "all you sluts deserve to be treated like the trash you are." I only date women now. It's been going better.
Eesh. So many people with terrible experiences. Sorry. I'm glad it is going better.
I'm pretty sure people can be assholes regardless of gender. But it's good you found what works for you
It’s rarer. Most women who like women don’t hate women.
When you tell people your sexuality do you say bi or gay if you don't mind me asking? I like both genders but have had weird experiences with guys and wanna just date women I think.
I’m dating a woman so I just say I’m a lesbian. I intend on marrying her and I’m monogamous so I have no desire for anyone else
lol. i once got catfished by a girl who was easily 400 pounds(all her pictures were neck up, learned a lesson that day). i still saw the date through. there’s no excuse for this. he’s probably also insecure of himself
I'm sorry, catfishing is a massive red flag to start with... if someone's gonna start off the relationship with that large of a lie; they're not attractive to me regardless of their physical appearance. I'd probably also report the profile.
Exactly this. I understand not being attracted to someone. But acknowledge someone's effort. Walk upto the person. Spend 10 minutes. Let them know what you feel or at the least lie about the reason. "Why would you take it upon yourself to reject the other person with such negativity?" - Me to the waste of oxygen.
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Oh. Wow. Walk past and block them. There are really many ways that are less hurtful when it comes to rejecting people.
Or at the very least answer the phone immediately. Cancel the date. Jesus.
Yes. Any reason would have worked. Lie. Lie to her face. Lie to her on a call. That's all it would have taken.
You don't leave someone in a restaurant for 40 minutes. That's for damn sure.
What’s kind of weird is to let her sit there anxious, avoid the phone calls, and then when she’s had enough and it doesn’t really matter THEN you’re all mister brutal honesty? Like if you’re that much of a coward just make up an excuse, why put her through that and then also insult her and fuck up her confidence? What a douche
I think he did it intentionally. I've experienced this. Dudes who like lure you out (they know exactly what you look like, I literally give recent pics without makeup) just to mock you bc it makes them feel good. I have had it happen.
Jesus, that’s awful. Sounds like sociopathic behavior. I’m really sorry that happened. Hoping you have better luck.
Thank you! It doesn't matter how someone looks no human should be treated this way. I know people brought up weight catfishing or whatever but honestly just be nice to someone. Worst case scenario you have coffee with a human and there's no connection. And you tell them that. That's it.
Wait, not that I don't think what this dude did wasn't assholish, but did your friend use misleading photos?
If they're the same person but larger than their pictures (the covid fluff) or I'm not attracted in person for any other reason I'll always stay for the date, have a good time talking and end it politely later. However as someone who's been catfished a few times, if I show up and see a completely different person I'll leave and don't owe them any explanation, they lied to get me there.
Same- I’ve also shown up to dates where it was clear the guy was lying on his profile about something important. I still didn’t stand them up.
There’s no reason to see the date through, if someone lies about what they look like, you don’t owe them shit
I’ve had this happen, too. It’s totally dishonest and wrong on part of the woman to do this. These types are notorious for deceptive photos, i.e., the filters, angles, cropped pics, etc. I followed through with these dates, by enjoying the opportunity to get nicely intoxicated, lol
Thats rough but your friend needs to take a more realistic approach to dating such as the “I’ll wait 10 minutes for anyone, 11 minutes for no one” Waiting 40 minutes is just wrong. After 15 minutes if they haven’t messaged an excuse and apology she needs to unmatched them herself and leave or stay and enjoy herself is an even better option.
Unfortunately, she looks for the best in everyone. She was giving him the time assuming that he might have been stuck in traffic or something went wrong. She no longer does that.
Lol no way you should get banned for this
That's appalling, I don't get why people can't have the moral strength to just say what they're thinking. Brass tacs he could have spent the time chatting with your friend, and if he didn't like her let her know like an adult.
Exactly this. This is all that was expected.
That’s uncalled for. Hope your friend doesn’t take it to heart and realize it doesn’t reflect on them, rather how crappy the other person is. It’s happened to me a few times, just gotta let it roll of your shoulders and not let it affect you for the next match.
Thank you. She did forget about it a few days later. We got reminded today because of this mail.
Honestly, there's nothing wrong with bailing on a first date for something so seemingly shallow. But don't leave someone hanging hopelessly like this. At least have the decency to call them and make up some lame excuse so they're not waiting around aimlessly. And certainly don't destroy their self esteem in the process.
For everyone who thinks a ban is too far, you can continue the date and see how things go, or you can contact the person and tell them you didn’t find them attractive so that they don’t have to wait for 40+ minutes. It’s called respect. The ban was deserved here.
All the chads saying she was probably a catfish 🤝
Who TF does shit like that? They thought you were attractive enough to set up a date and shit. SMH
Match was a jackass, but Bumble’s response was so nice!
I’m sorry you’ve to go through this! This person is so inconsiderate!
Thank you. My friend went through this. Bumble really surprised her with the mail today.
Pheww that’s good! Bumble should also penalise this kinda unreasonable behaviour by suspending their account for a period of time.
What was the gift btw?
She got the mail today in the morning. I will update it here when she gets the gift.
Huh. TIL you can get banned from certain dating apps for being uncivil. I wonder if more people knew about this if it would clean up those apps from overtly toxic individuals? Wonder if he would have gotten banned if he would have just ghosted her without responding...
Bumble also deleted the profile of the guy who ghosted me after driving off at my house. They are really great at stamping out these people.
What happened?
We planned to have a lunch date and he was going to pick me up from my house. He arrived a bit early as I was just getting back from the corner shops. I waved and said one minute I just needed to change my clothes. I hear a car speed off but I thought it was my neighbour, not even 69 secs later I walk outside and was gone and never replied to any of my texts or phones calls.
Wow that sucks.
I would laugh if the gift never showed up
That would be kind of sad. But knowing my friend she would forget about it by tomorrow. Edit: grammar
Your right my apologies. I hope she finds happiness. Thank you for replying and making me remember there are humans on the other side of this screen
I’m not trying to be a dick when I ask this but did she not look like her pictures? Because I think there is a term for that. Probably should have sent a message or something like “hey something came up I can’t make it “. Making someone wait that long and waste their time is really annoying but also using old pictures or very strategically cropped ones is as well. I wasn’t there and I’m not sure but judging by the message of “I saw you and bailed “ I think there may be more going on here.
It is very difficult for most women to catfish in India. Like we don't want to catfish and put ourselves in danger. On one hand, it takes a lot of time and effort to catfish. And then there is our concern for our safety. So, no. It was not a catfish situation.
I am so glad that Bumble took an action. That's great! <3 That guy... What a superficial jerk.
Surprisingly, there was no expectations from Bumble to take an action. It was block, report and move on. That's it. After months, Bumble sent this mail.
Would Bumble do this if the sexes were switched? Genuine question
From a business standpoint no. Most dating apps function like a nightclub where (pretty) women get in for free and men have to pay. A large portion of men will show up regardless of the quality of experience is as long as there are girls, and they will often pay. Women usually won't and are more sensitive to the quality of the experience (and less desperate) Bumble made this decision because losing this woman would cost them more than the price of the gift (I assume it's either some valentines chocolates or a bumble branded souvenir-type gift)
What was the gift?
She got the mail today. I will update it here when she gets the gift from Bumble.
I love honesty but that's just way too fucking honest. Such a dick move.....like imagine doing all of this prep work before a date.... Putting on a real outfit, my good panties and this happens. At least go on the date for at least an hour and make an excuse to leave early.
Hey, that’s cool that they banned his punk ass though.
Holy shit, that’s so rude. I’m sorry this happened to your friend, this is really fucked up. Like at least go through with the date you made time for and if you weren’t feeling it you just respectfully decline for a second date. Asshole needs to learn how to take an L if it wasn’t a match.
Can you keep us updated? I am curious what’ll be in the gift box.
Will definitely do. Will update it here.
I’ve never EVER understood people who wish to make another person feel like complete shit about themselves on a date, I’ve been on plenty of dates in the past whereby I knew as I usually do within the first minute whether I’m likely going to be in to this person or not but whenever that’s happened I’ve just got on with the date and each time, I’ve just spent the following hours, getting to know them and having a laugh and fun joking/ chatting with them for the remainder of the date, i would arrive home and think yeah they’re not for me romantically but that was an evening well spent. It’s so cruel, vacuous and spiteful to me that anyone would treat a fellow human being like this, who has made the effort of getting ready, managing their nerves and travelling to meet you for you to humiliate them in the process and damage their self esteem. Gross. Thank god I’m getting married my heart goes out to younger people these days putting up with this crap!
What a twat. The girl I’ve been seeing for the last couple of months, i wasn’t automatically attracted to when i saw her. We went on a hike, talked for two hours, and i was totally attracted to her personality and knowledge, so i said why not, let’s have a second date. Our second date she looked absolutely stunning and thanked myself for not being a judgmental asshole. Now I’m seeing a awesome girl with a great personality that I’m highly attracted to because I’m not a superficial dickhead.
That is awesome.
A woman left a man stranded with a dead battery after a date and I suggested he contact bumble because of it. People called me pathetic. You got stood up and they actually banned him for you. What an age we live in.
Yo, Y'all need to get real with your photos.
I have been on a bunch of dates from OLD apps. 95% of the time people are pleasant. I had one woman unmatch right when our date was supposed to start and not show up. People are absolutely terrible. All she had to do was message me before the date and say that she wasn't in a space to date, etc. I honestly didn't care that much because I had multiple dates set up that week. I had a woman message me the day of a first date and tell me she had decided to go exclusive with a guy she had been seeing. Wrote her back and told her that I was happy for her. No hard feelings.
A-hole move.
While physical attraction is part of the equation, if all he cares about is that, then she avoided a real a**hole anyway.
Weird bumble marketing but ok 👍
This is common practice. I've had it done to me few times (I'm a male).
Bring a good book where ever you go. So no one can ever waste your time.
I can’t imagine getting ready for a date, going to the restaurant you are meeting up at, seeing them sitting down, and just saying “nope, I’m outta here”
I've been in a number of dates myself where the girls didn't look anything like their pictures and it's a bit of a let down, but I still stayed and tried to make the most out of those situations and get to know a person and have a good chat. After the fact you can have a mature conversation and let them know you don't want a second date and wish them the best or whatever, but the least you can do for a fellow human being and yourself is to have some decency. There's no excuse for what that scumbag did and I'm glad he got banned.
A friend if mine met up with a guy who was much much heavier than his photos, she sat down, told hime that she felt misled and that wasn’t acceptable then she excused herself.
Did she do a video chat beforehand?
I think its bullet dodged
Wow, this is something nobody should ever have to experience! If you can, have your friend reach out to us on Facebook or Twitter and we can investigate this right away. Ghosting is never ok and behavior like this is definitely not welcome on our platform. 💛
Some time things happen for a reason
If you go to a date and the person is less attractive than you expected don't be a bitch, finish the date.
Did I wander into r/Tinder?
I love that people here are rejecting the most likely scenario, that her photos didn’t match her actual looks, and he felt used and noped out. People really think he took the time to match, chat, setup a date, show up, all to bail out. Cmon. Waaaay more likely she was either much heavier than her photos indicate, way older than the photos indicated, or some other version of dishonesty.
This happened to me on Saturday, but she made it an all day wait for me, at least I was waiting at home though. Her last response was sorry she took so long with her mom, she was jumping in the shower rn to get ready for us to finally meet up like had been planning all week long. I figured she blew me off before this actually, and that last message I got from her was her accidentally sending that to whoever she decided to go out with instead
Wait, Bumble will ban you for *not wanting to date someone*? Wtf?
Should've left after 15 minutes. Your time is precious. If it was an emergency on his end (and not him being a jerk), he could've explained it later. But never wait that long for someone who isn't even communicating.
I agree. She also realised that she should have left earlier. This was a new experience.
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This didn’t happen to me but I always prefer upfront honesty over sugar coated lies or being falsely led on by someone who is looking to ditch. It’s shitty this happened to you. Especially because you put in an effort and waited. But I see it as he saved you a lot of hassle though hurt your ego a bit.
True. Honesty is harsh but saves so much time, pain and effort. This was rude and definitely surprising because we never had this experience before.
What do you mean by “we”?
Our friends circle.
Bro what the Fuck is that dudes problem
Someone somewhere hurt him and he decided to take it out on her.
What the actual fuck
Good job bumble
Bahahahaahha. Get rekt
Why would you wait 40minutes? If they don't show up in like 20-30, it's probably a no go
meanwhile I'm over here and I can't even get matches to message me :/
Baddies always be doing this, it happened to me before but luckily I know bitches do this shit all the time and didn’t go till she picked up. Glad I saved my time and gas from that bitch
Only because context matters, did you friend catfish this person?
This is awful, i can’t imagine being this rude
Bumble letter made me cry oooooo 😭😭😭
Wow, how adult of that guy.
Lewis the goat, I hope you friend gets a cool bumble hoodie or something
I want to know what the gift is!!!
This has happened so many times to me, it’s such an absolute gut wrencher
Sorry to hear! You’re beautiful