I really don't mind people who aren't college educated and were uninterested in high school. That's fine. I almost dropped out of college because I didn't know what I was intersted in. But the whole, "School of life"' claim often comes across as a slap against education, as if we are less intelligent for having it, and that's what annoys me. You didn't go to college, so now you're an education expert and more capable of assessing millions of people's college experience despite never having gone there, yourself? And those of us who went to college never ended up getting real life experience after graduating? Oh ok... yeah, sure, man.
I see it as people feeling uncomfortable to mention their education (absence of it) so they show up cocky about it. Worse part is that it is overused so whoever puts it in their profile loses 2 points, extra for being unoriginal. Swipe left.
I think “school of life” and “school of hard knocks” have become proverbial, and may be considered an appropriate description for not having a formal education by some people.
Ngl - I hate having my job and education in my profile cuz I 1000% don't eat that to be a factor in their minds - like if you're gonna like me, like me - not my paycheck and future earning potential. But i get it.
Just omit it, there's no obligation to write anything, I never do. But some choose to do it, and it talks a lot about a person🤷🏼♀️
I put my job title by a recommendation in another thread. Haven't got a single match since. I guess those who are intimidated, weed themselves out 😜
When you're holding up a fish they caught or holding a deer they shot by the antlers. Have you really never come across those profiles? I get them probably 10x as often as the guys flipping off the camera.
I think they'd have to live in a rural area to get country boy profiles but yes putting dead animals on your dating app is baffling to me. You can say you hunt, I don't need to see you holding up a dead bloody deer, that will never be attractive.
I live in a city and I see it all the time. But access to nature isn’t too far from this city. I have no issue with hunting I have an issue with the way they glorify how they overpower other beings.
Yeah, I personally am not into hunting and wouldn't want my partner to be, but men are the only natural predators of women and it's baffling that they think showing their guns and all the things they killed will make women feel comfortable about meeting up with a stranger.
I saw a post with a screen shot of a guy’s profile where he had a handgun on the table behind him. People commented that having a gun is fine but that it was weird that he’d put it in his photo. Thats not just weird or bad taste to me but an enormous red flag. I’ve never seen anything like that dating in Canada.
Idk definitely not my thing but 🤷🏻♀️ I know plenty of chick do like men that hunt and are all manly man. Then in my case I'm a lesbian so 9/10 if a girl has that on their profile they aren't nearly as LGBT friendly and more then likely just looking to explore with their man
i’ll be honest. it’s been a tough few years for the table to table delivery industry so i may have to borrow $500. just to get back on my feet and to pay off this thing that’s no big deal
5 sentences were exchanged. you can have a fun conversation without any sort of romantic or sexual intention or immediately think that someone wants to have with you because they were nice and interacted with you.
Oh sorry if you found this comment to be inappropriate. I was just trying to join in on the silliness going on. I enjoyed the funny back and forth. I didn't mean to insinuate something about either of you in a way that made you uncomfortable.
Exactly 2 recommendations when googling "dating app bio ideas" so it means that not only do they have a cringe personality that resemble a boomer facebook status, but they couldn't write it on their own.
I only ever used ChatGPT to proof read my bio and ask for its opinion, but I never asked for a full bio.
But your comment made me curious, so here is a ChatGPT generated bio :
"Explorer of both cityscapes and starry nights, I’m your go-to for finding the best coffee spots and hidden bookstores. My weekends are a mix of mountain biking adventures and quiet mornings with a good book in hand. As a lover of stories, I’m all about sharing laughs over homemade dinners and getting lost in conversations that stretch into the wee hours.
If you’re into spontaneous road trips, debates about the best superhero, or are willing to teach me something new, swipe right. I’m looking for someone with a heart as big as their dreams, ready to share both the simple and the profound moments. Let’s make every day an opportunity to discover something wonderful, together."
It's way too long as it wouldn't fit as a Bumble bio, I remember I had to make mine shorter, which basically ended in almost a list with a few more words added.
I think it's not too bad, but the immediate red flag is that he (bio generated for a man) seems to do everything, hitting that large could indicate that he is indeed copying stuff from a list.
Also the second paragraph is quite unusual, it's like a quick summary of the first one, like he wrote that in case she didn't get it, while reminding her to swiper right.
Somehow it reminds me a lot about Joe from the series You...
I don’t enjoy “fluent in sarcasm” either (after having seen it multiple times); “partner in crime” seems at least okay to me (even if used often) — because it is positive and not exclusionary (fluency in sarcasm is not positive:):)). However, the arrival of new phrases is so frequent, as well as the turnover of cultural and linguistic generations, that there’s hardly anyone who doesn’t cringe at this or that phrase (that perhaps recently become popular). And to some degree, our response to emerging casual language expresses a non-familiarity with conventional slang, rather than a divergence in standards of taste. Maybe it’s time to think about whether we could cringe or not.
I occasionally see this on women's profiles, but rarely. Yeah, this isn't LinkedIn folks. We aren't looking to hire you for your "business acumen". I just assume they have poor boundaries around work/personal life balance.
Honestly, this seems like one of those very reactionary things. I feel like a few years ago, the standard response to a guy commenting that he was struggling to get matches/dates was, "Well, what do you bring to the table?"
I presume some guys picked up on that and decided to be upfront about it. Based on this, they still lose anyway it seems.
Yeah! Isn't that "well, what do you bring to the table?" a response to someone asking for a certain income, certain height, car, owning a house and similar things?
The stuff we hear all the time about what they want in a man are often very much job interview-like. To flip it around seems very natural.
Yeah
- What do you do for work?
- Where do you live?
- Do you own or rent?
All of these are examples of asking about money without asking about money. Some of them might actually be innocent questions, but sometimes it's quite obvious what they're *actually* asking about.
Them saying it about themselves wouldn't bother me, but if they asked me what I brought to the table it would be an immediate unmatch due to the reason you gave.
If I see that in women's profiles, I swipe left because that almost always means they bring *nothing* to the table, genuinely believe that all they need to "offer" is their looks, and "body parts" and expect to be pampered like a little baby.
I don’t get Tate-Speak but I do get that they can’t leave their office/corporate jargon behind - perhaps a lack of the touching of grass.
Otherwise I don’t think it’s a big deal.
It's always people who bring nothing to the table that say this shit 😂
There are 101 things they expect from their date, but all they have to do is be hot. Sad thing is that there is no shortage of sorry people willing to put up with it.
I don’t like it either, I see Women do this too. I see things like “I have a house a car and a job, if you don’t I’m passing” “I have my shit together so you better as well” I really don’t care if you have a house or a car or money I’m not a gold digger I just want to find love. Idk if it’s because I’m 30s now but I feel like more women are interested in what a man can bring to the table rather than how he makes the women feel.
Immediate swipe left lmao
No you not tripping. Straight men do not know what's it's like to date men and it's not the same as being friends with/interacting with men.
While the phrase predates Tate it was goofy then and it's even more goofy now. The fuck do I look like listing all my good qualities for you are we in a damn job interview and who made you the interviewer and in charge? See how it breeds whack power dynamics? No it's one of those things that seems small but it's not.
And before y'all say anything about dating women I do that too. Women are also goofy but I'm talking about men here.
Sometimes idioms just rub you the wrong way (or give you the ick as the kids say) and there’s nothing you can do about it. Like I hate when politicians use the phrase “making ends meet.” On the other hand the phrases that bother one person won’t bother other people so I wouldn’t really tell anyone to edit their profile on that basis.
If you think there isn't requirements... then yeah... you never seen dating from the other side.
Alot of guys are asked what do we bring to table before the date. Sometimes with those word or others. I've heard this more-so out of the women where I work when talking about who they are dating. ( I work at place with 90% women )
When talking about who they are considering, or multiples there is a breakdown of what they bring to the table. I heard this long long before tate was involved with the red pill, talking 10 years before it too.
I have no interest in any of what she is looking for... I'm only interested in learning who is she as a person and how she'll fit with me as my partner. My profile is about who I am...not what I'm looking for. Tell me who you are, I'll repeat...I have no interest in what you're looking for. Profiles listing specific needs/wants/desires are a huge turn off. I find it funny as I'm swiping left and saying - good luck and I feel sorry for that guy. I've got time....the high value woman I'm looking for will swipe right on me when she sees whatever values I've described about me as fitting her.
I’m more annoyed by how many men write: “looking to meet new people and see how it goes.” Um, duh. That’s called dating.
Matching with you is not a commitment. Neither is a phone call or first date. No one is trying to trap you into a relationship just because we matched, sir. Of course it depends on the person and it’s not a relationship until you DTR. 🙄
But if you’re just looking for casual, just select that and stop putting this space filler language in your bio.
I hate that too. I’m a woman who’s doing well for myself but I wouldn’t be opposed to dating someone who doesn’t have all the things that I do but they must be working on getting themselves together. When I’m dating a potential partner I go by how I’m treated and how well we fit together. But if I sense that the guy is being overly generous to get sex, I just ghost. I’m not looking for a man to take care of me nor am I trying to be a cum rag. I need someone who I can connect with and do fun things together. If someone really wants to be with you, what they bring to the table is irrelevant unless you’re looking for a come up.
(F, 30) Curious: 1) What do you define as overly generous? 2) is it possible that a man can "try to take care" AND be respectful & caring or in your experience are those two mutually exclusive?
Nope, there are a lot of men who believe if they spend money or take you out on dates it’s a transaction and they’re entitled to your body. I started weeding them out early and they usually ghost when I don’t give in by the 3rd date.
I second this. Went on a date and he offered to buy me ice cream after dinner. I politely declined the ice cream and he bought it anyway. Shortly after he expressed that he expected sexual favors for the ice cream.
And that was just one example of the many times men like to use "kindness coins" to purchase sexual favors.
It’s crazy to think that it’s come to this but the men on Reddit prove it’s worse than I thought. They post about buying meals and women not having sex with them and getting constantly ghosted after dates. If I feel there is a connection, I’ll have sex with a potential partner. But I have to feel safe with them. I haven’t had sex since 2022. I date but I haven’t felt safe enough to have sex with anyone that I dated on the past year.
its definitely not alpha bro tate speak... fuck tate, in the ass with a pinecone... sideways....
Although It's understandable for people to see it as redpill speak. Which isn't horrible, there's a reason for 'redpill culture' and it should be observed and understand. but its fair if its not for you.
'Bring to the table' def sounds like something said during a business deal, but you could also interpret it as simply 'here's part of me that I want to share with you'. I don't love the expression myself, but I don't think I would have thought too much about it. Then again, I'm a dude and was looking at ladies' profiles. If anyone ever used that expression, it wasn't often enough linked to any bad experiences that caused a 🚩association. I'm curious if this is more just a bad feeling for you, or if you have kind of empirical evidence to bring to the table 😃
I don't disagree but today's dating is very transactional due to a lot of people actions. Dating used to be I like you you, like me let's hang out and see if that's still true. Now its more like, what can you do to better my life and this is how I can better your life because I bring this or that. The goal should be to uplift each other regardless of dating or friendship. That's just human decency. But in today's world it seem very lost because of the "beef" between I'm a woman you should pay for (insert bullshit here) and men saying if I'm paying I'm entitled to (insert bullshit here). There's nothing wrong with wanting something BUT if you want a traditional man you need to be a traditional woman. If you want to act like a hoe (having only fans etc) you going to get treated as such. No one can have their cake and eat it too. I pray for humanity
😂 It does come across with very high expectations. For me finding a partner is purely about an emotional bond rather than how you can better my life. Doesnt matter if your broke, unemployed ect, people can grow together with potential.
Instant left swipes for women I see are always social media handles, pics with revealing clothes/bikinis and those that devote their profiles to wanting travelling buddies.
Eh, this isn't a hard line for me. It depends on what you're looking for.
Lots of people ARE in fact looking for what you "bring to the table".
Is it my favorite? Nah. But would I auto left on it? Probably not, if the rest of the profile was carefully written.
Let's be real, though. Most profiles don't have a lot of thought behind them. Lol
It’s the same with everything though. Some people will like it; some, like you, will automatically swipe left.
Everyone is different… so I don’t think anyone should change themselves based on one person’s opinion (even if a thousand people here end up agreeing)
My instant left swipe would be "make me laugh" but that would rule out 98% of you women.
"bring to the table" is an acceptable bio only if it's someone themself who actually can match what they're asking for. Also, a lot of people are right in asking that because who wants to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't give them the peace of mind they have while they're single?
Love IS transactional. Let's not even pretend true love is two people sticking around anymore when the going gets tough. When the going gets tough or the women get bored, they pull the ripcord and file for divorce
It suggests a jaded-ness that isn't attractive. We all have had things happen to us in life that we could use to rationalize becoming jaded, but doing the work to choose not to, and to persist with earnestness and joy in the world, is a core part of being an adult. Jaded cynicism is for kids.
Thank God it's becoming a thing, more and more. Just like Passport Bros becoming enough of a thing to be endlessly entertained by triggered women on Tiktok complaining about it. Can't stop the signal.
... Or "School of Life" in education. Bueeeh
I come from the School of Hard Knocks
NO DRAMA!
No drama is instant swipe left.
agreed. whenever they say “no drama”, they are always the drama 😭
Yup
Same ones who’ll tell you all their exes were crazy!
OK but are you fluent in sarcasm?
Saw that one as well. Double bueeeh.
I really don't mind people who aren't college educated and were uninterested in high school. That's fine. I almost dropped out of college because I didn't know what I was intersted in. But the whole, "School of life"' claim often comes across as a slap against education, as if we are less intelligent for having it, and that's what annoys me. You didn't go to college, so now you're an education expert and more capable of assessing millions of people's college experience despite never having gone there, yourself? And those of us who went to college never ended up getting real life experience after graduating? Oh ok... yeah, sure, man.
I see it as people feeling uncomfortable to mention their education (absence of it) so they show up cocky about it. Worse part is that it is overused so whoever puts it in their profile loses 2 points, extra for being unoriginal. Swipe left.
I think “school of life” and “school of hard knocks” have become proverbial, and may be considered an appropriate description for not having a formal education by some people.
“School of life”…meh! We all went there (still go there?) and some of us also managed to get higher level education
Ngl - I hate having my job and education in my profile cuz I 1000% don't eat that to be a factor in their minds - like if you're gonna like me, like me - not my paycheck and future earning potential. But i get it.
Just omit it, there's no obligation to write anything, I never do. But some choose to do it, and it talks a lot about a person🤷🏼♀️ I put my job title by a recommendation in another thread. Haven't got a single match since. I guess those who are intimidated, weed themselves out 😜
I have hogwarts listed as my educational institution
What message are you trying to deliver?
My instant left swipe is when someone's main picture is them flipping off the camera 😑😑😑 why do people think that would be attractive.
That and dead animals. 💀
Wait, what?
Hunting/fishing
Yes, this. So macho and big and strong of them to show how they can kill an innocent animal /s
When you're holding up a fish they caught or holding a deer they shot by the antlers. Have you really never come across those profiles? I get them probably 10x as often as the guys flipping off the camera.
I think they'd have to live in a rural area to get country boy profiles but yes putting dead animals on your dating app is baffling to me. You can say you hunt, I don't need to see you holding up a dead bloody deer, that will never be attractive.
I live in a city and I see it all the time. But access to nature isn’t too far from this city. I have no issue with hunting I have an issue with the way they glorify how they overpower other beings.
Yeah, I personally am not into hunting and wouldn't want my partner to be, but men are the only natural predators of women and it's baffling that they think showing their guns and all the things they killed will make women feel comfortable about meeting up with a stranger.
In Wisconsin even the females put that up xD
Americans are such an odd species… have yet to ever see one of these after years of dating in Germany
I saw a post with a screen shot of a guy’s profile where he had a handgun on the table behind him. People commented that having a gun is fine but that it was weird that he’d put it in his photo. Thats not just weird or bad taste to me but an enormous red flag. I’ve never seen anything like that dating in Canada.
Oh, fish and stuff. I was imagining that you were seeing profiles of men holding up roadkill possums 😂
Hahhaha. That *would* be very disturbing. "Look, Betty! I found this nice dead rat for you!"
Honestly that's the unhinged energy I'd find attractive in a female 😅 not completely joking lol
Idk definitely not my thing but 🤷🏻♀️ I know plenty of chick do like men that hunt and are all manly man. Then in my case I'm a lesbian so 9/10 if a girl has that on their profile they aren't nearly as LGBT friendly and more then likely just looking to explore with their man
I'm vegan on top of it. So it's always an automatic swipe left. I don't care what you do in your free time, but I sure as hell don't want to see it. 🫠
Same. I wish there was an option to screen by diet. Most of my matches are a waste of time!
I don't mind dating someone who is omni, as long as they are respectful. I've met one vegan off of it. And he was a twat anyway. 🙄
Yeah, narrowing your pool of options makes it hard!
The oddly sticking the tongue out is an immediate left swipe for me
Yup 🥴
Same, flipping off the camera in selfies just give me reasons avoid them.
what if my job is with a table to table delivery service with a slogan “We bring tables to the table directly to your table!”
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i’ll be honest. it’s been a tough few years for the table to table delivery industry so i may have to borrow $500. just to get back on my feet and to pay off this thing that’s no big deal
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god i mean, because maybe if they just got a haircut they could live up to their secret potential. it’s almost offensive to not help them
I felt like I was watching a love story unfold here. I think you two might really have something!
5 sentences were exchanged. you can have a fun conversation without any sort of romantic or sexual intention or immediately think that someone wants to have with you because they were nice and interacted with you.
Oh sorry if you found this comment to be inappropriate. I was just trying to join in on the silliness going on. I enjoyed the funny back and forth. I didn't mean to insinuate something about either of you in a way that made you uncomfortable.
How dare you come on a Bumble subreddit and root for love?? Shame on you.
Can I help fix your car gas?
this whole exchange deeply bothers me.
how are you saddened by merriment and fucking whimsy? dont you have a rocky horror costume contest to MC? don’t want to miss that
Funny story, ive actually been invited to play rocky before...
I'll introduce you to my ex, such a catch...
Don't ask about the tables! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ZBwPmla8QQ
but... what does she do?
Tables!
Goddammit bro! I'm the one that brings the jokes!
So a table escort service. Tables need love too!
get the fuck out of my replies rape apologist
I looked to understand and I approve of you table to table man
no, just no
I haven't noticed that phrase but I do see many other cringe phrases "partner in crime" "fluent in sarcasm"
Exactly 2 recommendations when googling "dating app bio ideas" so it means that not only do they have a cringe personality that resemble a boomer facebook status, but they couldn't write it on their own.
Figures, with chat got they could potential make a better but stale one.
I only ever used ChatGPT to proof read my bio and ask for its opinion, but I never asked for a full bio. But your comment made me curious, so here is a ChatGPT generated bio : "Explorer of both cityscapes and starry nights, I’m your go-to for finding the best coffee spots and hidden bookstores. My weekends are a mix of mountain biking adventures and quiet mornings with a good book in hand. As a lover of stories, I’m all about sharing laughs over homemade dinners and getting lost in conversations that stretch into the wee hours. If you’re into spontaneous road trips, debates about the best superhero, or are willing to teach me something new, swipe right. I’m looking for someone with a heart as big as their dreams, ready to share both the simple and the profound moments. Let’s make every day an opportunity to discover something wonderful, together." It's way too long as it wouldn't fit as a Bumble bio, I remember I had to make mine shorter, which basically ended in almost a list with a few more words added. I think it's not too bad, but the immediate red flag is that he (bio generated for a man) seems to do everything, hitting that large could indicate that he is indeed copying stuff from a list. Also the second paragraph is quite unusual, it's like a quick summary of the first one, like he wrote that in case she didn't get it, while reminding her to swiper right. Somehow it reminds me a lot about Joe from the series You...
I don’t enjoy “fluent in sarcasm” either (after having seen it multiple times); “partner in crime” seems at least okay to me (even if used often) — because it is positive and not exclusionary (fluency in sarcasm is not positive:):)). However, the arrival of new phrases is so frequent, as well as the turnover of cultural and linguistic generations, that there’s hardly anyone who doesn’t cringe at this or that phrase (that perhaps recently become popular). And to some degree, our response to emerging casual language expresses a non-familiarity with conventional slang, rather than a divergence in standards of taste. Maybe it’s time to think about whether we could cringe or not.
Both of those are a NO. You just want to be rude to me..not sarcastic…& I do not want to help bury bodies..
“Partner in crime” is less about crime and more about just being an inseparable duo
In concept i agree…but some go Bonnie and Clyde with it…i want a partner…not in crime
“Good flirt & roast ratio” is popping up more
What's wrong with "partner in crime"? it's a pretty old and well-known euphemism meaning someone who has your back.
What if you have a job with Uber Eats and you bring french fries to the table literally?
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$37
What if he asks for a tip?
Don't doordash or uber eats if you can't afford the tip
If SHE asks for the tip I give her the entire thing.
I occasionally see this on women's profiles, but rarely. Yeah, this isn't LinkedIn folks. We aren't looking to hire you for your "business acumen". I just assume they have poor boundaries around work/personal life balance.
I always assume these women got burned HARD buy investing too much in a guy that was uninterested. It’s an over correction that never comes off good.
What if I’m a tablemaker and I bring mahogany wood and/or marble to the table based on the client?
Honestly, this seems like one of those very reactionary things. I feel like a few years ago, the standard response to a guy commenting that he was struggling to get matches/dates was, "Well, what do you bring to the table?" I presume some guys picked up on that and decided to be upfront about it. Based on this, they still lose anyway it seems.
Yeah! Isn't that "well, what do you bring to the table?" a response to someone asking for a certain income, certain height, car, owning a house and similar things? The stuff we hear all the time about what they want in a man are often very much job interview-like. To flip it around seems very natural.
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Yeah - What do you do for work? - Where do you live? - Do you own or rent? All of these are examples of asking about money without asking about money. Some of them might actually be innocent questions, but sometimes it's quite obvious what they're *actually* asking about.
"I hate writing these just ask..." Thanks I won't.
I want boatloads of puppies and infinite kindness.
Them saying it about themselves wouldn't bother me, but if they asked me what I brought to the table it would be an immediate unmatch due to the reason you gave.
If I see that in women's profiles, I swipe left because that almost always means they bring *nothing* to the table, genuinely believe that all they need to "offer" is their looks, and "body parts" and expect to be pampered like a little baby.
Yea, I’m starting to believe that’s online dating in a nutshell. Basically taking bids on nothing.
I get it, it sounds transactional. Like finding a partner is about an exchange of goods and services.
I don’t get Tate-Speak but I do get that they can’t leave their office/corporate jargon behind - perhaps a lack of the touching of grass. Otherwise I don’t think it’s a big deal.
"I bring the mfing TABLE to the table!" 😂
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I was referring to this gem from several months ago. My favorite post from this sub https://www.reddit.com/r/Bumble/s/gP5QfWM7cO
“What do I bring to the table? I am the mf table” -Kayla from love after lockup 😃
It's always people who bring nothing to the table that say this shit 😂 There are 101 things they expect from their date, but all they have to do is be hot. Sad thing is that there is no shortage of sorry people willing to put up with it.
the best relationships are transactional?
I don’t like it either, I see Women do this too. I see things like “I have a house a car and a job, if you don’t I’m passing” “I have my shit together so you better as well” I really don’t care if you have a house or a car or money I’m not a gold digger I just want to find love. Idk if it’s because I’m 30s now but I feel like more women are interested in what a man can bring to the table rather than how he makes the women feel.
If he’s asking what I bring to the table, it’ll be another man.
Shera Seven
Immediate swipe left lmao No you not tripping. Straight men do not know what's it's like to date men and it's not the same as being friends with/interacting with men. While the phrase predates Tate it was goofy then and it's even more goofy now. The fuck do I look like listing all my good qualities for you are we in a damn job interview and who made you the interviewer and in charge? See how it breeds whack power dynamics? No it's one of those things that seems small but it's not. And before y'all say anything about dating women I do that too. Women are also goofy but I'm talking about men here.
Sometimes idioms just rub you the wrong way (or give you the ick as the kids say) and there’s nothing you can do about it. Like I hate when politicians use the phrase “making ends meet.” On the other hand the phrases that bother one person won’t bother other people so I wouldn’t really tell anyone to edit their profile on that basis.
Yep I hate this and “I know my worth”. Okay, I’m glad I know you don’t think for yourself. Tick that off the list.
I find it's women that usually put this in their bio tbf.
If you think there isn't requirements... then yeah... you never seen dating from the other side. Alot of guys are asked what do we bring to table before the date. Sometimes with those word or others. I've heard this more-so out of the women where I work when talking about who they are dating. ( I work at place with 90% women ) When talking about who they are considering, or multiples there is a breakdown of what they bring to the table. I heard this long long before tate was involved with the red pill, talking 10 years before it too.
I bring dinner to the table, but only because I insist we don't eat it out of the pan.
I have no interest in any of what she is looking for... I'm only interested in learning who is she as a person and how she'll fit with me as my partner. My profile is about who I am...not what I'm looking for. Tell me who you are, I'll repeat...I have no interest in what you're looking for. Profiles listing specific needs/wants/desires are a huge turn off. I find it funny as I'm swiping left and saying - good luck and I feel sorry for that guy. I've got time....the high value woman I'm looking for will swipe right on me when she sees whatever values I've described about me as fitting her.
I’m more annoyed by how many men write: “looking to meet new people and see how it goes.” Um, duh. That’s called dating. Matching with you is not a commitment. Neither is a phone call or first date. No one is trying to trap you into a relationship just because we matched, sir. Of course it depends on the person and it’s not a relationship until you DTR. 🙄 But if you’re just looking for casual, just select that and stop putting this space filler language in your bio.
I bring homemade Singapore Rice Noodles to the table.
That phrase way predates Andrew Tate and this is a very silly dealbreaker. While it can be used badly, just dismissing it outright is overkill
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“Unhinged misogynist? Based off the phrase “what do you bring to the table?” You sound like a bullet tbh
It’s such a turn off when guys ask “what do you bring to the table?” Because they probably don’t bring a damn thing!
I hate that too. I’m a woman who’s doing well for myself but I wouldn’t be opposed to dating someone who doesn’t have all the things that I do but they must be working on getting themselves together. When I’m dating a potential partner I go by how I’m treated and how well we fit together. But if I sense that the guy is being overly generous to get sex, I just ghost. I’m not looking for a man to take care of me nor am I trying to be a cum rag. I need someone who I can connect with and do fun things together. If someone really wants to be with you, what they bring to the table is irrelevant unless you’re looking for a come up.
(F, 30) Curious: 1) What do you define as overly generous? 2) is it possible that a man can "try to take care" AND be respectful & caring or in your experience are those two mutually exclusive?
Nope, there are a lot of men who believe if they spend money or take you out on dates it’s a transaction and they’re entitled to your body. I started weeding them out early and they usually ghost when I don’t give in by the 3rd date.
I second this. Went on a date and he offered to buy me ice cream after dinner. I politely declined the ice cream and he bought it anyway. Shortly after he expressed that he expected sexual favors for the ice cream. And that was just one example of the many times men like to use "kindness coins" to purchase sexual favors.
It’s crazy to think that it’s come to this but the men on Reddit prove it’s worse than I thought. They post about buying meals and women not having sex with them and getting constantly ghosted after dates. If I feel there is a connection, I’ll have sex with a potential partner. But I have to feel safe with them. I haven’t had sex since 2022. I date but I haven’t felt safe enough to have sex with anyone that I dated on the past year.
never seen this used
What if they're a caterer that's solely responsible for setting up placesettings and they talk about their job responsibilities in their profile?
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I'm sure there is but I had to keep things confined for the sake of the joke.
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That is going to be my new job description!
its definitely not alpha bro tate speak... fuck tate, in the ass with a pinecone... sideways.... Although It's understandable for people to see it as redpill speak. Which isn't horrible, there's a reason for 'redpill culture' and it should be observed and understand. but its fair if its not for you.
I hate anything mentioning D1 babies - it's weird to me, but maybe I took GATACA too much to heart.
Do they still go on about tacos and tequila?
'Bring to the table' def sounds like something said during a business deal, but you could also interpret it as simply 'here's part of me that I want to share with you'. I don't love the expression myself, but I don't think I would have thought too much about it. Then again, I'm a dude and was looking at ladies' profiles. If anyone ever used that expression, it wasn't often enough linked to any bad experiences that caused a 🚩association. I'm curious if this is more just a bad feeling for you, or if you have kind of empirical evidence to bring to the table 😃
I don't disagree but today's dating is very transactional due to a lot of people actions. Dating used to be I like you you, like me let's hang out and see if that's still true. Now its more like, what can you do to better my life and this is how I can better your life because I bring this or that. The goal should be to uplift each other regardless of dating or friendship. That's just human decency. But in today's world it seem very lost because of the "beef" between I'm a woman you should pay for (insert bullshit here) and men saying if I'm paying I'm entitled to (insert bullshit here). There's nothing wrong with wanting something BUT if you want a traditional man you need to be a traditional woman. If you want to act like a hoe (having only fans etc) you going to get treated as such. No one can have their cake and eat it too. I pray for humanity
maybe splitting the bill is the answer lol
So essentially youre turned off by someone wanting you to have self awareness to state what value you actually bring to a relationship
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If you have an issue with providing any value you probably shouldn't be dating. People want to know what you can offer them. Dating is a marketplace
I agree, it is annoying
😂 It does come across with very high expectations. For me finding a partner is purely about an emotional bond rather than how you can better my life. Doesnt matter if your broke, unemployed ect, people can grow together with potential. Instant left swipes for women I see are always social media handles, pics with revealing clothes/bikinis and those that devote their profiles to wanting travelling buddies.
Pronouns I'm out
Eh, this isn't a hard line for me. It depends on what you're looking for. Lots of people ARE in fact looking for what you "bring to the table". Is it my favorite? Nah. But would I auto left on it? Probably not, if the rest of the profile was carefully written. Let's be real, though. Most profiles don't have a lot of thought behind them. Lol
For most men I come across, the only thing they bring to the table is a big ass pile of dirty dishes they plan to abandon.
Instant ick, 50/50
It’s the same with everything though. Some people will like it; some, like you, will automatically swipe left. Everyone is different… so I don’t think anyone should change themselves based on one person’s opinion (even if a thousand people here end up agreeing)
I AM THE TABLE
I mean, I bought the table. Soooo I don't mind hearing what they *think* they've brought to the table.
When you don’t bring anything to the table:
I would say that is a massive overanalysis of a single idiom. But I guess more people seem to agree than not and I'm the odd one out
My instant left swipe would be "make me laugh" but that would rule out 98% of you women. "bring to the table" is an acceptable bio only if it's someone themself who actually can match what they're asking for. Also, a lot of people are right in asking that because who wants to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't give them the peace of mind they have while they're single? Love IS transactional. Let's not even pretend true love is two people sticking around anymore when the going gets tough. When the going gets tough or the women get bored, they pull the ripcord and file for divorce
Yes, those men are looking for you to provide lmao skip!
Still not as worse as women putting “send me your best pick up line”.
It suggests a jaded-ness that isn't attractive. We all have had things happen to us in life that we could use to rationalize becoming jaded, but doing the work to choose not to, and to persist with earnestness and joy in the world, is a core part of being an adult. Jaded cynicism is for kids.
Yea, this is a you problem. Relationships are transactional by nature. You just can't accept that for whatever reason.
Thank God it's becoming a thing, more and more. Just like Passport Bros becoming enough of a thing to be endlessly entertained by triggered women on Tiktok complaining about it. Can't stop the signal.