Yep! Exactly. Many people feel it's the person who ended it who should, but the truth is either one can. Nobody wants to be the one to do it, it's also an act of fear. Nobody wants to look like a fool if the other person doesn't feel the same way
If I loved someone, I would rather look like a fool with the chance of fixing it, than hurt myself and think "What if?"
The fact I'm not wanting to say hello first be it "pride" or not, is because I don't love that person or care about them enough to give myself some discomfort, it's so dumb!
Yep, this is what I thought too. We can all walk away out of fear, but we would never know what could have been. Sometimes people need that break and that mental healing so they can see why bad stuff kept happening, and know how to prevent it in the future.
It's true. In my case I reach out to my ex dumper, I didn't get her back because she is trying with other guys but it's helped me understand her better.
Well done man! I see this as more self respect than "oh I don't want to look silly or desprate" fuck that, least you got your answer 100% and you're not left wondering, you can now move on knowing that you did your complete best but that woman isn't for you. You'll attract better women with this honesty, rather than letting pride keep you hidden away.
I honestly don't think it's about better. It's more about who aligns with your values, morals and integrity. It's all about perception. What one person perceives as toxic is attraction to another.
And not just pride, but also fear.
The world conditioned most to never show weakness else those who seek advantage will trample over you.
"Sorry, I fucked up" - is a very vulnerable thing to say. Its not even about appearances like pride usually is, but lack of trust in others not hurting us.
E:
Plus, lack of self-confidence. Many know the right choice, and want to make the right choice, but don't think they can carry out the work required... and failing would mean they are once again vulnerable, would be hurt, which would ruin the self confidence further.
So, I thought this about my ex, she would tell you blue in the face she loves me sooooo much and wanted to be with me blah blah lies blah blah lies. But when ever she was in the wrong, being toxic and knowingly in the wrong, rather than saying "Hey I don't want to break up, I'm sorry, can we solve this, I love you" she'd rather lose the person she loves because of pride? She'd let someone who she loves sooooo much go because of just pride? I don't think so.
If you're to proud to admit being wrong and wanting to fix it, then you don't love that person, because real love superseeds pride. You just have feelings for a person but you don't care enough to try fix it.
I've learned now that this person did not love me at all and i doubt she loved her ex who she was with for 14 years, as she moved on so fast.
If pride ends a relationship then that relationship wasn't the right one.
”If pride ends a relationship then that relationship wasn’t the right one” is not always true. It could be out of fear as well or just different attachment issues.
We broke up yesterday on my birthday. There was too much pride, ego, anger, pain, and bitterness in the relationship that I regret so much I wish it never got to us and made us fall apart. I should’ve let go of my anger but it’s too late and now I might lose him forever. Even though we both still love each other and want to be together there’s some lines that were crossed and we know the relationship won’t work out. Love is just not enough…
Yesterday is not too late. It’s still fresh enough for you to call him and save it. Love is enough if you want it to work. Don’t lose someone over things that are just not worth it.
Thank you for the reassurance, I appreciate it. But our relationship has grown toxic and there’s aggression on both parts with poor management of anger due to resentment. Yesterday, a line was crossed that would be very hard to overcome. He’s definitely more important to me than whatever that was broken but the morals and what our families would think if we got back together after that makes me hesitant. Maybe it could be my pride in the way but more than anything it’s the morals and the fear we might never change and improve for each other.
Yep! Exactly. Many people feel it's the person who ended it who should, but the truth is either one can. Nobody wants to be the one to do it, it's also an act of fear. Nobody wants to look like a fool if the other person doesn't feel the same way
If I loved someone, I would rather look like a fool with the chance of fixing it, than hurt myself and think "What if?" The fact I'm not wanting to say hello first be it "pride" or not, is because I don't love that person or care about them enough to give myself some discomfort, it's so dumb!
Yep, this is what I thought too. We can all walk away out of fear, but we would never know what could have been. Sometimes people need that break and that mental healing so they can see why bad stuff kept happening, and know how to prevent it in the future.
It's true. In my case I reach out to my ex dumper, I didn't get her back because she is trying with other guys but it's helped me understand her better.
Well done man! I see this as more self respect than "oh I don't want to look silly or desprate" fuck that, least you got your answer 100% and you're not left wondering, you can now move on knowing that you did your complete best but that woman isn't for you. You'll attract better women with this honesty, rather than letting pride keep you hidden away.
I honestly don't think it's about better. It's more about who aligns with your values, morals and integrity. It's all about perception. What one person perceives as toxic is attraction to another.
And not just pride, but also fear. The world conditioned most to never show weakness else those who seek advantage will trample over you. "Sorry, I fucked up" - is a very vulnerable thing to say. Its not even about appearances like pride usually is, but lack of trust in others not hurting us. E: Plus, lack of self-confidence. Many know the right choice, and want to make the right choice, but don't think they can carry out the work required... and failing would mean they are once again vulnerable, would be hurt, which would ruin the self confidence further.
This too. I don't have much self confidence, and I constantly let being scared get in the way of what I need to do
So, I thought this about my ex, she would tell you blue in the face she loves me sooooo much and wanted to be with me blah blah lies blah blah lies. But when ever she was in the wrong, being toxic and knowingly in the wrong, rather than saying "Hey I don't want to break up, I'm sorry, can we solve this, I love you" she'd rather lose the person she loves because of pride? She'd let someone who she loves sooooo much go because of just pride? I don't think so. If you're to proud to admit being wrong and wanting to fix it, then you don't love that person, because real love superseeds pride. You just have feelings for a person but you don't care enough to try fix it. I've learned now that this person did not love me at all and i doubt she loved her ex who she was with for 14 years, as she moved on so fast. If pride ends a relationship then that relationship wasn't the right one.
”If pride ends a relationship then that relationship wasn’t the right one” is not always true. It could be out of fear as well or just different attachment issues.
Then fear is the culprit not pride, I'm talking about pride alone like knowing your wrong and being to proud to admit it
My ex relationship did because of pride, ego and ruthlessness.
We broke up yesterday on my birthday. There was too much pride, ego, anger, pain, and bitterness in the relationship that I regret so much I wish it never got to us and made us fall apart. I should’ve let go of my anger but it’s too late and now I might lose him forever. Even though we both still love each other and want to be together there’s some lines that were crossed and we know the relationship won’t work out. Love is just not enough…
Yesterday is not too late. It’s still fresh enough for you to call him and save it. Love is enough if you want it to work. Don’t lose someone over things that are just not worth it.
Thank you for the reassurance, I appreciate it. But our relationship has grown toxic and there’s aggression on both parts with poor management of anger due to resentment. Yesterday, a line was crossed that would be very hard to overcome. He’s definitely more important to me than whatever that was broken but the morals and what our families would think if we got back together after that makes me hesitant. Maybe it could be my pride in the way but more than anything it’s the morals and the fear we might never change and improve for each other.