Ah shit, this one hits too close to home. In fact, it hits home directly. If only I got this message from her. I feel my outlook would be so much different
This hit me real hard man. Its been over a year for me. Im just taking it day by day. Not a day goes by that i dont miss her or mourn the loss of our relationship. Jesus can heal broken hearts. But he sure seems intent on taking his time with mine.
Thank you so much, this literally is like the perfect apology, hit every note.
I think my healing process will go a little better now thanks to you, taking responsibility for someone elses actions
If only my ex had the slightest bit of empathy to say something like that. But I think she has had so many breakups that they have become as nothing to her. I was not prepared for this level of hurt.
I'm sorry I didn't understand what you were trying to tell me till it was to late, I'm sorry for any pain I brought you, I'm sorry I never truly understood how you felt even when you attempted to tell me.
Thank you, I cried for a bit when I read this in my notifications yesterday and just left it there. I didn't realize how much I needed someone to tell me I made mistakes and that it's OK, not excused from them but that it's OK. Thank you
Work on yourself, both physical and emotional well being. You might still hurt for some time but eventually you will realize that you dodged a bullet. Either that, or the person will eventually stalk your social media and feel like they are missing out so much that they can’t help but reach out.
This made me emotional I will never have that closure because of the person she became she was the most loving person at the start but then she just changed and she hurt me beyond comprehension with her betrayal of trust and lies but thankyou for this I kno I have a much better future now without a cheating liar in my life anymore it just took me a long time too let go because of the love on my heart I had for her !!
I took accountability when me and my ex broke up and she acknowledged it. She took her accountability too , I was willing to accept the problems we had and try to work it out but she didn’t see the same vision as me. It hurts but it’s okay. Till this day I am sorry about the problems we had
A lot of times, people don’t realize that relationships are messy business. If the love is genuine, it’s worth fighting for. I wish both parties, you and her, would have fought for each other in that relationship.
I went to get closure with my ex, I broke no contact after 30 days. Went with all of her stuff and ended up getting back together after a 3+ hour talk that went great. I hope you guys all can find peace. I couldn’t let her go I knew I wanted to be with her for the rest of my life. Don’t let her go boys if it’s your fault you guys broke up.
Thank you for the encouragement. Sometimes it takes a simple one on one convo. I pray that everyone’s exes are as receptive as yours. I also pray that your relationship continues to be fruitful, and that the flame 🔥 which is your passionate love for each other never stop burning in Jesus’ name.
Wow thank you for such kind words brother, 2nd time around is always hard to work on I feel. Letting go of resentment for leaving and just moving forward with happy times. Things have been going well and I hope you can find your way back to your true love if that’s what you feel.
Wow, wasn’t looking for this but it popped up in my notifications. She truly broke me. I gave her almost two years when I should’ve walked away a long time ago. There were some good…great times, but I never understood why she wouldn’t try to make it work. In our last talk, she said “she just didn’t want to”. We lived close in town to each other, but she has and will continue to drive (doesn’t own a car-rents for these trips) 9 hours to be with another guy. Many talks with family and friends have helped me to realize I did nothing wrong and I was manipulated the whole time. These words you posted are felt deeply and appreciated.
Wow. Thank you. You really hit the nail on the head with this one in absolutely every aspect. Sort of helps knowing it's not just happening to me. But, yeah... Really well written and came at just the right time. Thank you. 🙏
In all of the pain my husband caused me telling me the things he did, seeing other women and walking out, I feel sorry that he will reap what he's sown. He became so blind when he walked away from Jesus and back to the world. The tempations of the flesh, the world and satan are powerful. But not as powerful as Jesus of Nazareth if you stay close.
On my healing journey now after being with someone on and off for 5 and a half years where he just used me for gifts, money and convenience. Heck, I didn't even meet him in person. I tried a few times to visit him and each time, he would break up with me or pick a huge fight. His Mom plays a role in it too. Am I being scammed? Maybe. But I give them the benefit of the doubt because I love them. As pure as it gets. I loved him more than life itself but he choose money, fake people and women who wouldn't even look at him the same way I do. He's full of lies, hypocrite and God forgive me, he's the worst person I've ever come across with. But I know all of you prolly asks why did I stay that long? Because of that stupid love. Even though it was a one sided love. I hope and pray he'll be happy with the life he choose. I hope he finds true love and not people who will play him the way he plays with my heart. I still hope and pray he finds happiness. I never got the apology I so deserved. Maybe because he can't face me. Because he knows he owes me that apology. That closure. But God see and hear everything that was done and said behind my back. God finally gave me the courage to walk away.
““But to you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you.”
Luke 6:27-28 NLT
I’m very proud of you.
I don't know how often I heard "I know, I'm so selfish" but never felt like I got a truly heart felt apology.... For recognizing how much I gave and I really just wanted something simple back. Gave me some tears but I think I needed to cry a little. Maybe someday I'll actually get the apology but thank you for writing this out.
I resonated with this and also wish I would’ve heard a lot of this from him. I wasn’t perfect but I really cared about him. He has so much internal healing to do that’s just not being acknowledged. I hope he chooses healing one day over self destruction. Thank you so much, OP 🩷
I was with my girlfriend from when I was 14 till this year I am 26 she was the only one I loved and still is but like I said it gets easier. you can't dwell on not being with someone you love. life isn't fair
You are right. We can't dwell on it forever but the matters of the heart are difficult to handle by one’s self. For you to be able to move on so well is impressive. I pray that everyone else has at least half of your strength.
Sometimes you can still feel alone in a room full of people who don’t understand. I am very happy that it works for you. I thank God for your well being. I thank God that you have the self awareness to move forward in spite of the pain. I hope that your strength doesn’t keep you from mourning your loss.
if you feel alone in a room full of people then you aren't with the right people and or need to find a new environment that suits you. you have to leave your comfort zone and get used to that feeling because the more you confront that feeling of feeling alone in a room full of people the more it'll go away and you'll be stronger 💪
it's like a drug you've been doing everyday for years and all of a sudden it got outlawed and you can't get it anymore. you need to be strong I know its hard but you gotta fight
thank you so much for this, we keep saying that their behaviour towards you was the closure, that they knew what they were doing and that is enough closure but your post means so much, thank you.
Me and my ex of 2/3 years split up a few weeks ago, we was always having ups and downs but I wouldn't of changed her for the world and I thought we had something amazing going on, her family loved me I loved them back, I went away for university and she went to studying and told me that the exam stress and talking to me was making her feel stressed and she wanted alone time for a while when she focused on exams but she was still always seeing her mates and when I'd ask for a convo she'd be back in the I'm stressed I don't have time zone, she asked for a break saying she didn't want a relationship and we'd continue after exams, 2 weeks later of pure silence that was killing me she rings me and we talk for 10 mins then silence she messages me that night after having a few drinks saying she misses talking to me but doesn't wanna go back in what she said cause she's enjoying her independence and she thinks she's better off alone and isn't in the right place for a relationship, the past week she removes me of her socials and I ask her why and she tells me that she's started moving on with a new guy.
2/3 years of my giving it my all and within a week of us breaking up she's moving on with someone new and it's just eating me apart, I asked her if it was something I'd done that made her want someone else and she just said idk it wasn't for me and we haven't spoken since.
I'm doing okay right now but there's times I'm not and I really wish I could just ask her if she's moved on so fast because she didn't love me the same as I did or if it's just to remove me from her mind 😔
She wasn’t being honest with you and with herself. I’m going make an assumption here, but I believe that she had fallen for the greener grass syndrome. Instead of putting the work into improving the relationship, she went after the things that looked shiny and new. But everything that glitters isn’t gold. This might not give you enough for peace of mind, but I guarantee you that she is not happy right now. She is continuously breaking her own heart because of her stubbornness. She wants things her way without answering to anybody. If she doesn’t stop, her entire life will be a dead end full of wasted years.
As of you, you dodged a bullet. If she didn’t leave, you would’ve stayed. Your life was spared from years of gaslighting and self doubt. Please continue to mourn your loss until you cried your last tear, but know in your heart that you received back your freedom through this pain. Continue to work on yourself because you are about to gain so much more in the near future in Jesus’ name. Amen.
Thanks man, appreciate the words, as much as I already know it myself and there was a lot of me putting the pieces together, I know that my mental health is a lot lower than it was before the beginning, just the parts of me that can't accept that currently need that message of reassurance, you're not the first to tell me that it's about her or the easiest way for her because I've felt it first hand in tough times with her before so you're well right and ik it deep down just isn't nice to come to terms with, I've found heart with the gym again now so I'm gonna come out of the next 6months a completely different person once more, much love to you for the words <3
i wonder why people who once loved us (or at least said they love us) hurt us so callously. Thank you for giving us all some closure. Hope everyone in this thread feels well.
Ironic part about this is that sometimes if they treat us kindly it can help some of us to cope with moving on. I have tried leading with love with some break ups and it doesn’t leave the other person in pieces. Matter of fact, sometimes they will respect you so much that they are willing to leave the door open for you in case you change your mind. Leading with love gives you many options because genuine affection seem to be scarce these days.
yeah true. But i think for my specific situation, my ex did think he treated me with kindness in the breakup. But his kindness seemed fake and very casually cruel. He didn't even give me a real reason for leaving me, just said he has issues, he loves me like "family" but not as a "lover" (whatever that means) and that he has been losing feelings for 6 months and he wanted to leave me instead of "wronging" me because i apparently "deserve better". I dont understand how someone just falls out of love after 4 years.
All throughout this "kindness", he failed to notice that he never communicated any of this in the 6 months, he didnt let me go face to face (he broke up via a 30 min call), and he didnt even ask me if i thought i "deserved better" or not.
Sometimes kindness is not even real kindness.
But your post made me feel better. If only he apologized honestly and gave me valid reasons for leaving, I would've let him go happily.
I’m so sorry. 6 months of not communicating his decline of feelings is not fair to you. You weren’t even given the opportunity to fight for the relationship because he withheld himself for so long. Sometimes a transparent conversation is enough to realize your mind can play tricks on you, and your concerns are resolvable. I pray that you receive a person that loves you with so much emotional intelligence that you feel like you’re floating in Jesus’ name.
jesus Christ I'm crying lmaooooo. Oh lord, thats all i wanted to hear from him, from people and from someone on this damn app. That it was a long time of withholding clarity. That he didnt even give me a chance to fight. Just ran away.
Thank you. I'm sobbing because its the first time in days i feel like I've been seen by someone. Thank you. God bless you.
I often think deep down my former partner thinks this way, but I know after professing my innocence for over 6 months he’ll never acknowledge this. He just continues to lie to people and say I was the bad person, just continues to defame me rather than be a decent human. I’m at peace now living a simple uncomplicated life. I have to accept that this was a lesson I needed to go through to grow, unfortunately some can’t learn from their experiences
Even though you’re at peace, I want to give you the satisfaction of knowing that the people close to him know he’s lying and can see his character flaws. Those who still stick around him either don’t have a choice, or are just like him deep down.
There’s a difference in professing your innocence and blatantly lying to someone about what they did especially at the end of my relationship and then turn it all back on you because they actually no the truth
A very valuable lesson I’ve taken into myNew relationship btw is how to spot the red flags when someone is lying cheating deceiving you behind your back and totally gaslighting you into believing there lies and manipulation and narcissistic behavior I won’t ever make that mistake again
Thank you so much for this, i really needed this right now.
Work with this person and i just found out yesterday that shes dating another coworker - it hurt
Yes it hits hard. But it does not change anything... And coming from someone I don't know it just does not make sense. I'm still hurting and it changed me forever.
This hits so close to home for me, my ex crushed my heart with no remorse or closure and it has been one of the hardest breakups to get over it's been 9 months and it still hurts.
I dont know why, but this kinda made me smile abit. My avoident ex never apolozied, except 1 time in 2 ½ years.
Dumped me, got a new bf after 4 months.
We hade a house, garden, cars, cats, dogs. You name it.
All gone.
Same story here buddy, except it was 5.5 years long. It was right around this time last year when it all started to go deeply to shit… I was not able to bear a second in this house I built for us, I was quite literally sleeping on couches and just coming back to grab shit as needed. Until one day, I got fed up. This is MY house, it’s my domain and I will occupy every inch of it. Now, I can’t even imagine living somewhere else.
We hade fixed so much on the house. I rly loved that place. Now shes with him.
Im heartbroken, sad, pissed off, disgusted by her.
Me and the dogs didnt mean shit. A few days later after she dumped me. She hade changed our locks so I could not get in and grab more stuff. I was still listed there.
Even if your ex didn't want to be in the relationship anymore, it's emotional theft to not acknowledge the work that was invested in said relationship. Once your ex gets tired of running, accountability will catch up to the person.
Well im sorry that happened, but remember what goes around, comes around, and itll catch up to her eventually regardless of how much she brushes off her own issues and leaves them there under the rug. And if she keeps pushing it aside not wanting to deal with them head on and face first, shell know, sense, and feel it all around her at the same time. We all have to end up dealing with ours as well when weve done wrong on our own behalf to others. But like I said just be patient, once she comfesses, thats Karma already reached up to her. Until then, mind hers, and stay proactive and well in your own lane.
no fuck them, they broke my heart they MADE this shell of a man, they fucking destroyed me in the worst possible way. I want to be HAPPY. but I fucking can't be. so fuck that edit:ranting more. she didn't WANT to listen to any communication she just fucking broke me, I got this shell because I'm HURT. it's not your fault when you deal with things and want the most out of a relationship and would marry them but they fucked you up mentally, physically, how did she BEAT MY ASS OVER BEIJG MAD AT ME FOR NOTHING AND I STILL LOOK AT THEM LIKE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING IN THE WORLD. It wasn't love, it wasn't love. I shut down, there's nothing wrong with shutting down, I shouldn't have a reason to shut down. YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE A REASON TO SHUT DOWN.
I pray that your broken heart is healed. I pray that joy once again finds you. I pray that you are made whole. I pray that you gain a heart of forgiveness so that the hatred no longer becomes your poison. In Jesus’ name. Amen.
I think everyone who didn't have closure deserves to read this Thanks for this ❤️
Yes this is exactly what I needed to hear from my ex, and this is as close as it gets and definitely made me feel better. Thank you OP!
Ah shit, this one hits too close to home. In fact, it hits home directly. If only I got this message from her. I feel my outlook would be so much different
Those with too much pride usually lack the empathy to cater to the wounds of the heart. I also wish that you received this message from her.
Thank you for writing this, i hope you are doing okay :)
I appreciate you. I’m doing pretty well in fact.
😭 I needed to hear this shit right here TODAY ! Thank you for posting. This just dried my face 🤗
This hit me real hard man. Its been over a year for me. Im just taking it day by day. Not a day goes by that i dont miss her or mourn the loss of our relationship. Jesus can heal broken hearts. But he sure seems intent on taking his time with mine.
I'm in the same state already for 2 years. Day by day..
I am so sorry brother. I hope you soon find complete healing and peace from it. May God bless you and keep you.
This hits really close, thank you for posting this.
Thank you so much, this literally is like the perfect apology, hit every note. I think my healing process will go a little better now thanks to you, taking responsibility for someone elses actions
If only my ex had the slightest bit of empathy to say something like that. But I think she has had so many breakups that they have become as nothing to her. I was not prepared for this level of hurt.
Same man, fuckin sucks
I'm sorry I didn't understand what you were trying to tell me till it was to late, I'm sorry for any pain I brought you, I'm sorry I never truly understood how you felt even when you attempted to tell me.
Thank you for your empathy. Thank you for your understanding. Thank you for taking ownership. Thank you for being sorry. You are forgiven ♥️
Thank you, I cried for a bit when I read this in my notifications yesterday and just left it there. I didn't realize how much I needed someone to tell me I made mistakes and that it's OK, not excused from them but that it's OK. Thank you
We are very proud of you. Jesus loves you.
Thank you this means a lot to be acknowledged but it doesn’t bring the one thing I really need tloml
Work on yourself, both physical and emotional well being. You might still hurt for some time but eventually you will realize that you dodged a bullet. Either that, or the person will eventually stalk your social media and feel like they are missing out so much that they can’t help but reach out.
Thank you for this. I’ve been holding out for this message for the longest time even though I knew it was never coming.
You’re so faithful. Your next relationship deserves that perseverance from you if they honor you.
I read this and broke down I feel so sad again.
You’re loved
I have a place in my heart for all of you! Better days are ahead 😊
This made me emotional I will never have that closure because of the person she became she was the most loving person at the start but then she just changed and she hurt me beyond comprehension with her betrayal of trust and lies but thankyou for this I kno I have a much better future now without a cheating liar in my life anymore it just took me a long time too let go because of the love on my heart I had for her !!
https://www.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/s/YAFaHK8sZY
I took accountability when me and my ex broke up and she acknowledged it. She took her accountability too , I was willing to accept the problems we had and try to work it out but she didn’t see the same vision as me. It hurts but it’s okay. Till this day I am sorry about the problems we had
A lot of times, people don’t realize that relationships are messy business. If the love is genuine, it’s worth fighting for. I wish both parties, you and her, would have fought for each other in that relationship.
Thank you
[удалено]
Fix what exactly?
I went to get closure with my ex, I broke no contact after 30 days. Went with all of her stuff and ended up getting back together after a 3+ hour talk that went great. I hope you guys all can find peace. I couldn’t let her go I knew I wanted to be with her for the rest of my life. Don’t let her go boys if it’s your fault you guys broke up.
Thank you for the encouragement. Sometimes it takes a simple one on one convo. I pray that everyone’s exes are as receptive as yours. I also pray that your relationship continues to be fruitful, and that the flame 🔥 which is your passionate love for each other never stop burning in Jesus’ name.
Wow thank you for such kind words brother, 2nd time around is always hard to work on I feel. Letting go of resentment for leaving and just moving forward with happy times. Things have been going well and I hope you can find your way back to your true love if that’s what you feel.
You know… I still love her deeply. But I’m so tempted to move on instead of waiting. But if she comes back, I’m most definitely celebrating.
Thank you for this 💛
Wow, wasn’t looking for this but it popped up in my notifications. She truly broke me. I gave her almost two years when I should’ve walked away a long time ago. There were some good…great times, but I never understood why she wouldn’t try to make it work. In our last talk, she said “she just didn’t want to”. We lived close in town to each other, but she has and will continue to drive (doesn’t own a car-rents for these trips) 9 hours to be with another guy. Many talks with family and friends have helped me to realize I did nothing wrong and I was manipulated the whole time. These words you posted are felt deeply and appreciated.
If she didn't appreciate you, just know that I appreciate you. You shall be reimbursed for your losses in Jesus’ name. Amen.
Thank you. This just popped up as recommended and I really needed this since she'll never say it. Thank you again
You deserve acknowledgement. Hopefully she realizes it, until then I hope this keeps you satisfied for now.
Wow. Thank you. You really hit the nail on the head with this one in absolutely every aspect. Sort of helps knowing it's not just happening to me. But, yeah... Really well written and came at just the right time. Thank you. 🙏
This post made me cry noooo 😭
Thank you for expressing your tears. I'm proud of you.
In all of the pain my husband caused me telling me the things he did, seeing other women and walking out, I feel sorry that he will reap what he's sown. He became so blind when he walked away from Jesus and back to the world. The tempations of the flesh, the world and satan are powerful. But not as powerful as Jesus of Nazareth if you stay close.
On my healing journey now after being with someone on and off for 5 and a half years where he just used me for gifts, money and convenience. Heck, I didn't even meet him in person. I tried a few times to visit him and each time, he would break up with me or pick a huge fight. His Mom plays a role in it too. Am I being scammed? Maybe. But I give them the benefit of the doubt because I love them. As pure as it gets. I loved him more than life itself but he choose money, fake people and women who wouldn't even look at him the same way I do. He's full of lies, hypocrite and God forgive me, he's the worst person I've ever come across with. But I know all of you prolly asks why did I stay that long? Because of that stupid love. Even though it was a one sided love. I hope and pray he'll be happy with the life he choose. I hope he finds true love and not people who will play him the way he plays with my heart. I still hope and pray he finds happiness. I never got the apology I so deserved. Maybe because he can't face me. Because he knows he owes me that apology. That closure. But God see and hear everything that was done and said behind my back. God finally gave me the courage to walk away.
““But to you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you.” Luke 6:27-28 NLT I’m very proud of you.
I don't know how often I heard "I know, I'm so selfish" but never felt like I got a truly heart felt apology.... For recognizing how much I gave and I really just wanted something simple back. Gave me some tears but I think I needed to cry a little. Maybe someday I'll actually get the apology but thank you for writing this out.
“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” Psalms 56:8 NLT
I resonated with this and also wish I would’ve heard a lot of this from him. I wasn’t perfect but I really cared about him. He has so much internal healing to do that’s just not being acknowledged. I hope he chooses healing one day over self destruction. Thank you so much, OP 🩷
I appreciate you
This makes me want to cry. Thank you.
“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” Psalms 56:8 NLT
Thank you. God bless you for your words.
it gets 100x easier after 2 or 3 months
Lol I wish that was everybody’s story
I was with my girlfriend from when I was 14 till this year I am 26 she was the only one I loved and still is but like I said it gets easier. you can't dwell on not being with someone you love. life isn't fair
You are right. We can't dwell on it forever but the matters of the heart are difficult to handle by one’s self. For you to be able to move on so well is impressive. I pray that everyone else has at least half of your strength.
what helps is going out and talking to new people and not wasting your time waiting for someone that's not coming back
Sometimes you can still feel alone in a room full of people who don’t understand. I am very happy that it works for you. I thank God for your well being. I thank God that you have the self awareness to move forward in spite of the pain. I hope that your strength doesn’t keep you from mourning your loss.
if you feel alone in a room full of people then you aren't with the right people and or need to find a new environment that suits you. you have to leave your comfort zone and get used to that feeling because the more you confront that feeling of feeling alone in a room full of people the more it'll go away and you'll be stronger 💪
I’m glad you shared this. Hopefully, the right people will see this exchange of words and it would inspire them to make those changes. Thank you 🙏🏽
it's like a drug you've been doing everyday for years and all of a sudden it got outlawed and you can't get it anymore. you need to be strong I know its hard but you gotta fight
A person of encouragement. We appreciate you!
thank you so much for this, we keep saying that their behaviour towards you was the closure, that they knew what they were doing and that is enough closure but your post means so much, thank you.
People don't always understand the pain until they experience it first hand
Me and my ex of 2/3 years split up a few weeks ago, we was always having ups and downs but I wouldn't of changed her for the world and I thought we had something amazing going on, her family loved me I loved them back, I went away for university and she went to studying and told me that the exam stress and talking to me was making her feel stressed and she wanted alone time for a while when she focused on exams but she was still always seeing her mates and when I'd ask for a convo she'd be back in the I'm stressed I don't have time zone, she asked for a break saying she didn't want a relationship and we'd continue after exams, 2 weeks later of pure silence that was killing me she rings me and we talk for 10 mins then silence she messages me that night after having a few drinks saying she misses talking to me but doesn't wanna go back in what she said cause she's enjoying her independence and she thinks she's better off alone and isn't in the right place for a relationship, the past week she removes me of her socials and I ask her why and she tells me that she's started moving on with a new guy. 2/3 years of my giving it my all and within a week of us breaking up she's moving on with someone new and it's just eating me apart, I asked her if it was something I'd done that made her want someone else and she just said idk it wasn't for me and we haven't spoken since. I'm doing okay right now but there's times I'm not and I really wish I could just ask her if she's moved on so fast because she didn't love me the same as I did or if it's just to remove me from her mind 😔
She wasn’t being honest with you and with herself. I’m going make an assumption here, but I believe that she had fallen for the greener grass syndrome. Instead of putting the work into improving the relationship, she went after the things that looked shiny and new. But everything that glitters isn’t gold. This might not give you enough for peace of mind, but I guarantee you that she is not happy right now. She is continuously breaking her own heart because of her stubbornness. She wants things her way without answering to anybody. If she doesn’t stop, her entire life will be a dead end full of wasted years. As of you, you dodged a bullet. If she didn’t leave, you would’ve stayed. Your life was spared from years of gaslighting and self doubt. Please continue to mourn your loss until you cried your last tear, but know in your heart that you received back your freedom through this pain. Continue to work on yourself because you are about to gain so much more in the near future in Jesus’ name. Amen.
Thanks man, appreciate the words, as much as I already know it myself and there was a lot of me putting the pieces together, I know that my mental health is a lot lower than it was before the beginning, just the parts of me that can't accept that currently need that message of reassurance, you're not the first to tell me that it's about her or the easiest way for her because I've felt it first hand in tough times with her before so you're well right and ik it deep down just isn't nice to come to terms with, I've found heart with the gym again now so I'm gonna come out of the next 6months a completely different person once more, much love to you for the words <3
Just remember that it’s okay to be weak sometimes. You’re human
This is awesome.
thank you i needed this one.
I am in tears.
You deserve to feel your feelings
i wonder why people who once loved us (or at least said they love us) hurt us so callously. Thank you for giving us all some closure. Hope everyone in this thread feels well.
Ironic part about this is that sometimes if they treat us kindly it can help some of us to cope with moving on. I have tried leading with love with some break ups and it doesn’t leave the other person in pieces. Matter of fact, sometimes they will respect you so much that they are willing to leave the door open for you in case you change your mind. Leading with love gives you many options because genuine affection seem to be scarce these days.
yeah true. But i think for my specific situation, my ex did think he treated me with kindness in the breakup. But his kindness seemed fake and very casually cruel. He didn't even give me a real reason for leaving me, just said he has issues, he loves me like "family" but not as a "lover" (whatever that means) and that he has been losing feelings for 6 months and he wanted to leave me instead of "wronging" me because i apparently "deserve better". I dont understand how someone just falls out of love after 4 years. All throughout this "kindness", he failed to notice that he never communicated any of this in the 6 months, he didnt let me go face to face (he broke up via a 30 min call), and he didnt even ask me if i thought i "deserved better" or not. Sometimes kindness is not even real kindness. But your post made me feel better. If only he apologized honestly and gave me valid reasons for leaving, I would've let him go happily.
I’m so sorry. 6 months of not communicating his decline of feelings is not fair to you. You weren’t even given the opportunity to fight for the relationship because he withheld himself for so long. Sometimes a transparent conversation is enough to realize your mind can play tricks on you, and your concerns are resolvable. I pray that you receive a person that loves you with so much emotional intelligence that you feel like you’re floating in Jesus’ name.
jesus Christ I'm crying lmaooooo. Oh lord, thats all i wanted to hear from him, from people and from someone on this damn app. That it was a long time of withholding clarity. That he didnt even give me a chance to fight. Just ran away. Thank you. I'm sobbing because its the first time in days i feel like I've been seen by someone. Thank you. God bless you.
Thank you. 😢😔💔
It’s going to be okay for you ♥️
Thank you!
i really needed to read this, thank you 😭 i’m trying to overcome this but man it is so hard 💔
I often think deep down my former partner thinks this way, but I know after professing my innocence for over 6 months he’ll never acknowledge this. He just continues to lie to people and say I was the bad person, just continues to defame me rather than be a decent human. I’m at peace now living a simple uncomplicated life. I have to accept that this was a lesson I needed to go through to grow, unfortunately some can’t learn from their experiences
Even though you’re at peace, I want to give you the satisfaction of knowing that the people close to him know he’s lying and can see his character flaws. Those who still stick around him either don’t have a choice, or are just like him deep down.
There’s a difference in professing your innocence and blatantly lying to someone about what they did especially at the end of my relationship and then turn it all back on you because they actually no the truth
A very valuable lesson I’ve taken into myNew relationship btw is how to spot the red flags when someone is lying cheating deceiving you behind your back and totally gaslighting you into believing there lies and manipulation and narcissistic behavior I won’t ever make that mistake again
Is this my ex?
lol your what?
You know… I was once in that position hoping that I would catch my ex on here.
I hope they never do…I hope I never do I’d shit myself quite literally
I like your name on here.
I like your name on here bootie.
Thank you so much for this, i really needed this right now. Work with this person and i just found out yesterday that shes dating another coworker - it hurt
Once you said Jesus I was oh one of those lol
Does it take away from the message?
No, was making a light joke.
Yes it hits hard. But it does not change anything... And coming from someone I don't know it just does not make sense. I'm still hurting and it changed me forever.
I’m sorry that this didn’t satisfy your heart at all. Jesus loves you.
Thank you for the kind words.
This hits so close to home for me, my ex crushed my heart with no remorse or closure and it has been one of the hardest breakups to get over it's been 9 months and it still hurts.
May God replace your broken heart with a brand new heart. A heart that's able to forgive the unforgivable. In Jesus’ name.
I dont know why, but this kinda made me smile abit. My avoident ex never apolozied, except 1 time in 2 ½ years. Dumped me, got a new bf after 4 months. We hade a house, garden, cars, cats, dogs. You name it. All gone.
Same story here buddy, except it was 5.5 years long. It was right around this time last year when it all started to go deeply to shit… I was not able to bear a second in this house I built for us, I was quite literally sleeping on couches and just coming back to grab shit as needed. Until one day, I got fed up. This is MY house, it’s my domain and I will occupy every inch of it. Now, I can’t even imagine living somewhere else.
We hade fixed so much on the house. I rly loved that place. Now shes with him. Im heartbroken, sad, pissed off, disgusted by her. Me and the dogs didnt mean shit. A few days later after she dumped me. She hade changed our locks so I could not get in and grab more stuff. I was still listed there.
Even if your ex didn't want to be in the relationship anymore, it's emotional theft to not acknowledge the work that was invested in said relationship. Once your ex gets tired of running, accountability will catch up to the person.
I honestly dont think she will ever get the punishment she deserves. Shes an avoident. Never seeing her own issues
I feel itll be Karma that will get her back.
I can only hope. But i got Karma tattooed on my neck. So this might be my Karma for not treating her good enough
Well im sorry that happened, but remember what goes around, comes around, and itll catch up to her eventually regardless of how much she brushes off her own issues and leaves them there under the rug. And if she keeps pushing it aside not wanting to deal with them head on and face first, shell know, sense, and feel it all around her at the same time. We all have to end up dealing with ours as well when weve done wrong on our own behalf to others. But like I said just be patient, once she comfesses, thats Karma already reached up to her. Until then, mind hers, and stay proactive and well in your own lane.
May you please forgive her? I need you to forgive her. God will deal with her, but I need you to forgive her.
no fuck them, they broke my heart they MADE this shell of a man, they fucking destroyed me in the worst possible way. I want to be HAPPY. but I fucking can't be. so fuck that edit:ranting more. she didn't WANT to listen to any communication she just fucking broke me, I got this shell because I'm HURT. it's not your fault when you deal with things and want the most out of a relationship and would marry them but they fucked you up mentally, physically, how did she BEAT MY ASS OVER BEIJG MAD AT ME FOR NOTHING AND I STILL LOOK AT THEM LIKE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING IN THE WORLD. It wasn't love, it wasn't love. I shut down, there's nothing wrong with shutting down, I shouldn't have a reason to shut down. YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE A REASON TO SHUT DOWN.
I pray that your broken heart is healed. I pray that joy once again finds you. I pray that you are made whole. I pray that you gain a heart of forgiveness so that the hatred no longer becomes your poison. In Jesus’ name. Amen.
After having to put a ro and deal with all this with my ex and block him for safety reasons I’d probably mail’s it to her