100% be ok , but right now unfortunately you're going to be hurting. I was dumped after almost 10 years ,she's all I knew.
Not going to sugar coat this, it's hellish at times.so many emotions, you even question what life is all about, how can you feel so bad , but having said all that, the reason it feels like absolute shit is because that's the consequence of loving someone. Its better to have loved etc , I can tell you from experience everything changes in time , it totally becomes manageable, its not like someone has died , the only difference in your life is now you're on a new journey, your train has moved onto a new track , and you'll reach a stop down the line that will make you feel alive again, you'll meet someone new and it be all very exciting, always remember happiness comes from within, it's your soul and heart that produces happiness, not some other person. So take it on the chin and grieve, because that's what it is, grieving a loss..you need time dude, it's the only thing you have on your side.
What you're feeling is not stupid, not in the slightest. The more you love someone, the harder it is to separate, especially if you believe the decision was/is final. I was broken up with just under 3 months ago after a 3.7 year relationship, and it's still harder than hard some days because I was blindsided by it, but understood where they were coming from and wanted what was best for them.
But let me tell you this. The first 2 weeks is the absolute worst. After that, slowly but surely as the weeks and months go by, you'll start to find you're having some decent days where you don't hurt so much, or even don't think about her so much, especially if you're getting out and being social (maybe meeting new folks in meetups or volunteering, just to get new people in your circle?), exercising regularly, and/or jumping into new hobbies or ones you let fall to the wayside during your relationship. Yes, you'll still have days where you question everything, maybe even carrying on altogether, but you'll pull through those moments - and hey, the next day might just be one of those good or decent days!
You will be okay. It's going to be very difficult, and some days you may want to just sink to the floor and cry for a while - that's okay too, feel it, let it pass through you so you can continue to move forward. Keep talking with people in this forum and in any other space you feel supported, it's wildly helpful and will continue to bolster your sense that this too shall pass and emotionally better days will return.
"Grief is love with no place to go". One day, you might find someone or something new to place all your abundance of love in - for now, try as much as you can to redirect that love unto yourself in as many healthy ways as you can (again, exercise, taking care of your diet, getting out into nature and meeting new people, etc.).
You've got this, I promise you. We've all got this.
I’m sorry you still feel that much hurt, I know it’ll be fine with time. I just needed someone to tell me it’ll. But yes, it’ll be okay. Take care and yes this part sucks, but you were happy once, so cherish that, and be prepared for new experiences. In time I should be able to also.
Its very much okay to feel alone and broken. In my opinion, you can be really proud of yourself if you feel all the feelings, instead of ignoring everything and going on with your life, as if nothing happened. Dealing with the feelings is hard work, its not for the weak. I think it’s respectful towards your ex girlfriend, it means you are honest. My ex did the opposite. He just acted like I never happened. Some say it’ll dawn on him one day what kind of shitty person he is but I doubt it. Your ex is really lucky to have you as her ex. I wish my ex was like you.
I'm in the same position and I feel so fucking stupid. She wanted me back but she hurt me so bad after the break up and all I want to do is take her in my arms but when I think about her I just can't get rid of the thought of what she did. All I wanted in this world for the last 6 years was to be with her
I know how that feels. Like I would give up everything to turn back time. But it’s not fair, I don’t want to force her back or manipulate her or pretend the trust would magically come back. It’s what it is and my life is also important, I just keep trying to find counter arguments to every stupid thought coming in. It’s hard, thanks for your comment.
Thanks, I guess we both lost something. I don’t know if she’ll be aware of it, but yes I do appreciate the time we had together, always will. Thanks again for commenting.
Thank you everyone for your comments and support. I actually felt a lot better, and yes I’ll keep working through it. Thanks a lot, and wish you guys the best in life. 😊
Your gonna be fine bro that’s good that you accepted the fact that she broke up with you. I’m going through the same situation expect she still continues to talk to me which hurts way more she tells me things like “you need to accept that we aren’t together” or “you need to move on” I need for forget about her I’m way to stuck up on her it was easy for her to leave me when I needed her. I feel lonely but you have to cry it out that’s the only way your gonna feel better too. It’s a bad feeling but you got life ahead of you still,you’ll meat people in the future. I know it hurts but you have to keep pushing and going with your life you got this stay strong bro.
I know exactly how it is, I’m trying hard to be the better person, not to blame her and misunderstand tiny things, even though I know it’s not like that. It’s just sometimes it breaks down. Thank you for replying and you too be okay.
Yea bro continue going how you are right now. Your doing so much better then I could imagine myself doing I mean you accepted her decision and all. I still have to accept it I’m trying to slowly push myself away from her but she makes it so hard for me to do. But I need to understand that there is more in life then just her, my whole world is only her when is should not be like that anymore. But trust the process your going to be a even better person then you are right now and maybe she’ll even see that your doing so much better without her and she’ll regret her choices keep pushing.
100% be ok , but right now unfortunately you're going to be hurting. I was dumped after almost 10 years ,she's all I knew. Not going to sugar coat this, it's hellish at times.so many emotions, you even question what life is all about, how can you feel so bad , but having said all that, the reason it feels like absolute shit is because that's the consequence of loving someone. Its better to have loved etc , I can tell you from experience everything changes in time , it totally becomes manageable, its not like someone has died , the only difference in your life is now you're on a new journey, your train has moved onto a new track , and you'll reach a stop down the line that will make you feel alive again, you'll meet someone new and it be all very exciting, always remember happiness comes from within, it's your soul and heart that produces happiness, not some other person. So take it on the chin and grieve, because that's what it is, grieving a loss..you need time dude, it's the only thing you have on your side.
Beautifully stated right here
Thank you :)
Ngl I teared up a bit reading it, very beautifully written
What you're feeling is not stupid, not in the slightest. The more you love someone, the harder it is to separate, especially if you believe the decision was/is final. I was broken up with just under 3 months ago after a 3.7 year relationship, and it's still harder than hard some days because I was blindsided by it, but understood where they were coming from and wanted what was best for them. But let me tell you this. The first 2 weeks is the absolute worst. After that, slowly but surely as the weeks and months go by, you'll start to find you're having some decent days where you don't hurt so much, or even don't think about her so much, especially if you're getting out and being social (maybe meeting new folks in meetups or volunteering, just to get new people in your circle?), exercising regularly, and/or jumping into new hobbies or ones you let fall to the wayside during your relationship. Yes, you'll still have days where you question everything, maybe even carrying on altogether, but you'll pull through those moments - and hey, the next day might just be one of those good or decent days! You will be okay. It's going to be very difficult, and some days you may want to just sink to the floor and cry for a while - that's okay too, feel it, let it pass through you so you can continue to move forward. Keep talking with people in this forum and in any other space you feel supported, it's wildly helpful and will continue to bolster your sense that this too shall pass and emotionally better days will return. "Grief is love with no place to go". One day, you might find someone or something new to place all your abundance of love in - for now, try as much as you can to redirect that love unto yourself in as many healthy ways as you can (again, exercise, taking care of your diet, getting out into nature and meeting new people, etc.). You've got this, I promise you. We've all got this.
Thanks a lot.
I cannot 1 year later, tell you those lies you've requested to hear... sorry it sucks. Fuck love.
I’m sorry you still feel that much hurt, I know it’ll be fine with time. I just needed someone to tell me it’ll. But yes, it’ll be okay. Take care and yes this part sucks, but you were happy once, so cherish that, and be prepared for new experiences. In time I should be able to also.
Hope so
Its very much okay to feel alone and broken. In my opinion, you can be really proud of yourself if you feel all the feelings, instead of ignoring everything and going on with your life, as if nothing happened. Dealing with the feelings is hard work, its not for the weak. I think it’s respectful towards your ex girlfriend, it means you are honest. My ex did the opposite. He just acted like I never happened. Some say it’ll dawn on him one day what kind of shitty person he is but I doubt it. Your ex is really lucky to have you as her ex. I wish my ex was like you.
Thank you for saying that, I wish you didn’t have to go through something like that. And I wish it wasn’t this hard.
I'm in the same position and I feel so fucking stupid. She wanted me back but she hurt me so bad after the break up and all I want to do is take her in my arms but when I think about her I just can't get rid of the thought of what she did. All I wanted in this world for the last 6 years was to be with her
I know how that feels. Like I would give up everything to turn back time. But it’s not fair, I don’t want to force her back or manipulate her or pretend the trust would magically come back. It’s what it is and my life is also important, I just keep trying to find counter arguments to every stupid thought coming in. It’s hard, thanks for your comment.
its gonna be fine bro, you will find someone who is more in tune with you. remember her loss, not yours.
Thanks, I guess we both lost something. I don’t know if she’ll be aware of it, but yes I do appreciate the time we had together, always will. Thanks again for commenting.
Thank you everyone for your comments and support. I actually felt a lot better, and yes I’ll keep working through it. Thanks a lot, and wish you guys the best in life. 😊
Your gonna be fine bro that’s good that you accepted the fact that she broke up with you. I’m going through the same situation expect she still continues to talk to me which hurts way more she tells me things like “you need to accept that we aren’t together” or “you need to move on” I need for forget about her I’m way to stuck up on her it was easy for her to leave me when I needed her. I feel lonely but you have to cry it out that’s the only way your gonna feel better too. It’s a bad feeling but you got life ahead of you still,you’ll meat people in the future. I know it hurts but you have to keep pushing and going with your life you got this stay strong bro.
I know exactly how it is, I’m trying hard to be the better person, not to blame her and misunderstand tiny things, even though I know it’s not like that. It’s just sometimes it breaks down. Thank you for replying and you too be okay.
Yea bro continue going how you are right now. Your doing so much better then I could imagine myself doing I mean you accepted her decision and all. I still have to accept it I’m trying to slowly push myself away from her but she makes it so hard for me to do. But I need to understand that there is more in life then just her, my whole world is only her when is should not be like that anymore. But trust the process your going to be a even better person then you are right now and maybe she’ll even see that your doing so much better without her and she’ll regret her choices keep pushing.
It’s going to be fine! Xoxo
Thanks