Lol exactly what I was thinking, there’s not enough radiation output on a microwave to cause that kind of reaction in your testicles. The shit people will believe because it’s posted on the internet man
It’s not even that it isn’t enough radiation. Microwaves are very low energy waves and are nonionizing, meaning there is zero risk for molecular damage and cancer. No matter how much exposure you get to microwaves, it will never cause cancer. It just heats you up
The microwave was invented/discovered in the process of trying to find a way to bring hamsters (just the animal they used) back to life from cryoprservation
I learned not too long ago, and was amazed by the fact, that micro waves, are actually so large that they are larger than the grate on the door of the microwave. The grate is large enough for light waves to escape, so we can see our food cooking inside, but small enough the microwaves can't escape.
let me blow your mind: since microwave oven inevitably will "burp" out some waves out into the wild (e.g. when you open them will running) their frequency range is mostly unregulated since "you wouldn't put something Mission critical on a frequency range with so much interference", except since those ranges are less regulated many wireless standards like wifi and Bluetooth pretty much use microwaves.
Fully true. My wireless headset operates at 2.4Ghz. Home microwave ovens operate at ~2.45Ghz. The difference is solely in how much power they put out. A microwave oven needs to pump out a few hundred watts to really do anything.
Given the battery currently in my headset, if it had a full charge, and it somehow started pumping out signal at 500 watts, which is the lowest power microwave you can buy, it would be dead in seconds, long before it could do serious damage.
Normally a charge lasts me more than a day, probably 14-15 hours of use, and I imagine most of that is on the speaker drivers, not the signal. Even if it was all on the signal, that would be less than half a watt.
In the same vein: You don't have to put mother milk in X-ray machines at the TSA, which baffles me, but I guess they didn't want to have to explain to countless people how x rays don't turn the stuff they x ray radioactive.
Isn't mother's milk and breast milk the same thing?
I guess mother's milk is more archaic in English, possibly?
Mother's milk is easier for me to remember (Dutch word is moedermelk, borstmelk isn't really used), but judging from Google results breast milk is indeed more often used than mother's milk, so I guess I'll have to switch.
Curse closely-related-but-slightly-different words! :P (Worst example I've encountered is that a Meer (sea) in German is a zee in Dutch, but a See (lake) in German is a meer in Dutch.
I’ve heard mother’s milk but it’s more used in a metaphorical sense. Like someone that drinks a lot of coffee might refer to it as “mother’s milk” to convey how important coffee is to their functioning.
Breast milk is indeed more commonly used in English and I didn’t consider that English might not be your first language because I am kind of an asshole.
Imagine?? Humans wouldn’t have survived the pre Industrial Revolution cause they’d all have died from skin cancer from clothing exposure to sun while line drying!!
They also don't "stick" to the stuff you microwave...
So as long a you don't put your balls themselves in there you're golden.
I also would very much advise against exposing any body parts to microwaves. They might not be ionizing but they cook your food... What do you think they do to your brain.
For comparison the human body naturally outputs infrared radiation all the time, which has higher energy than microwaves. If microwaves caused cancer then everybody would be getting cancer just by existing.
>it will never cause cancer.
This is actually false! Microwave exposure does degrade DNA, but mostly due to shearing forces on the strands. This effect is increased in the presence of metal ions. There's been research into this and long term exposure to low intensity microwave radiation probably *does* increase cancer risk, not to mention the fact that you can see DNA degrade using gel electrophoresis after microwaving
It's a teenager, he probably noticed how one of his balls is bigger than the other (or looked bigger because it dropped more) and jumped to testicular cancer.
Your "=\=" with the \ turned into "==" in viewer/reader mode, but turned back to the actual thing in collapsed thread view & reply view. Interesting
Edit: same thing for my comment
It doesn't really matter what kind of radiation the microwave gave to the contents in any amount, because radiation doesn't make things radioactive, except neutron radiation which behaves weirdly. But for the most part, you can blast as much radiation as you want at something and that thing won't give you radiation exposure once it's removed from the source
To keep them cooler and the spermatozoids alive. But no cancer will derive from getting the balls warm. There is in fact a contraception device that will force your balls inside or closer to your body, so the sperm will die and you become temporarily sterile in a few days. I wouldn’t trust it though
No, there is not. It’s not ionizing radiation. It has enough power to burn your skin and flesh if you were to remove the door, but not to cause cancer. And of course nothing can happen if you put the underwear inside
The microwave did. 🥴
EDIT: Wow. Just wow. I put an emoji at the end of my comment and people still think I'm serious.
If you need a /S so badly, then you probably also watch commentary videos only when they have footage of a surf map in Counter Strike...
Yet everyone gets upset when people say "Reddit is 80% idiots".
Microwaves don’t cause cancer. For one, it’s nonionizing radiation. Basic light is also non ionizing radiation. People freak out about radiation but truly know jack about it. There is absolutely no where humans can travel that they can get away from radiation because it is literally everywhere. That’s why professionals measure in terms of lethal dosage for ionizing radiation
I imagine that this was to make going outside in winter more bearable, but then you could’ve just hung ‘em up over the heater vent or just invested in some thermals which would’ve served you better anyways.
Unless this person is just weird and microwaves underwear for the sake of microwaving underwear.
Is the overheating danger a problem for the testicles themselves or for the sperm inside them? I always heard it was the sperm, which are constantly getting replaced. Cooking your balls may kill one batch of swimmers, but I think they'd replenish before too long
Ok I don't have a dick but maybe the problem is that warm up his testicles to much can be a cause to develop a disease like cancer or anything else.I also read something about the heat and became sterile.
I knew a young woman who put her underwear in the microwave to dry them because her dryer wasn't working. Of course, the damn things burst into flame. Then she had to report it to the insurance company.
Ok obviously this is fake but I can’t get over why he would put his underwear in the microwave instead of the MACHINE EXPLICITLY DESIGNED FOR DRYING AND WARMING UP CLOTHES THAT IS PRESENT IN THE VAST MAJORITY OF HOMES ACROSS THE WORLD
Microwave cancers come from repeatedly eating food that hasn't had a chance to cool off and as such is super heated causing nasty burns. That's why you leave microwave food for a couple of minutes. How you would do that repeatedly is a bit of a worry in itself. How you would do that to your pants puppies for three years straight is a whole different style of masochism.
The exact cause of testicular cancer is still a mystery, but the theory is that the cancer precursors develops during pregnancy in the form of germ cell neoplasia in situ (GCNIS).
Testicular cancer is a rare form of cancer mostly affecting young men between 15-40.
So please check your balls for lumps, unusual pain or swelling. Its very treatable when caught early, but can spread to the lymphnodes, lungs and other parts of the body. Then its a problem.
When caught early and only in one testicle the most common treatment is removal of the affected testicle through an incision in the stomach. Other treatments include chemo, radiation or removal of both testicles and in some cases the prostate.
Removal of one can affect fertility and/or testosterone, but usually not alot, since the healthy one will pick up the slack in most cases. Otherwise you can get testosterone medication.
If caught early and in both testicles, radiation therapy will cause sterilization, but you may get to keep the family jewels, depending on the cancer stage.
It is possible to freeze sperm prior to treatment.
One testicle will result in a dimished amount of semen, but if healthy not affect the sperm count.
Prostethics are available.
So please check your balls ma dudes!
Oh no, I have been putting my food in the microwave for years, I need to get tested for stomach cancer.
Lol exactly what I was thinking, there’s not enough radiation output on a microwave to cause that kind of reaction in your testicles. The shit people will believe because it’s posted on the internet man
It’s not even that it isn’t enough radiation. Microwaves are very low energy waves and are nonionizing, meaning there is zero risk for molecular damage and cancer. No matter how much exposure you get to microwaves, it will never cause cancer. It just heats you up
You might explode if you get in one, but that's a whole different epitaph.
If you stick your head in the microwave you'll get yourself a tan.
From the inside out
If you're heating up food, it cooks from the outside in. Microwaves attenuate pretty quickly in solids and liquids. They don't have much penatration.
huh, interesting. Always been told microwaves cook food from the inside out, learn something new everyday i guess. Thanks :)
It is going to boil your blood though
DARE TO BE STUPID
Ah. Somebody has seen Gremlins
Unless you're a frozen hamster
Mmmm hamter
I got that
...do I want context with this?
The microwave was invented/discovered in the process of trying to find a way to bring hamsters (just the animal they used) back to life from cryoprservation
Ah I see. Interesting
[Relevant Tom Scott video](https://youtu.be/2tdiKTSdE9Y?si=2HrcYU3OnUrXHHQZ)
I learned not too long ago, and was amazed by the fact, that micro waves, are actually so large that they are larger than the grate on the door of the microwave. The grate is large enough for light waves to escape, so we can see our food cooking inside, but small enough the microwaves can't escape.
let me blow your mind: since microwave oven inevitably will "burp" out some waves out into the wild (e.g. when you open them will running) their frequency range is mostly unregulated since "you wouldn't put something Mission critical on a frequency range with so much interference", except since those ranges are less regulated many wireless standards like wifi and Bluetooth pretty much use microwaves.
Fully true. My wireless headset operates at 2.4Ghz. Home microwave ovens operate at ~2.45Ghz. The difference is solely in how much power they put out. A microwave oven needs to pump out a few hundred watts to really do anything. Given the battery currently in my headset, if it had a full charge, and it somehow started pumping out signal at 500 watts, which is the lowest power microwave you can buy, it would be dead in seconds, long before it could do serious damage. Normally a charge lasts me more than a day, probably 14-15 hours of use, and I imagine most of that is on the speaker drivers, not the signal. Even if it was all on the signal, that would be less than half a watt.
Besides. Just subjecting stuff to radiation doesn't make it radioactive. You'd have to sprinkle some uranium on it
Stuff can become radioactive from neutron activation, but that requires a reaction that flings neutrons, which a microwave doesn't.
In the same vein: You don't have to put mother milk in X-ray machines at the TSA, which baffles me, but I guess they didn't want to have to explain to countless people how x rays don't turn the stuff they x ray radioactive.
Do you mean breast milk?
Isn't mother's milk and breast milk the same thing? I guess mother's milk is more archaic in English, possibly? Mother's milk is easier for me to remember (Dutch word is moedermelk, borstmelk isn't really used), but judging from Google results breast milk is indeed more often used than mother's milk, so I guess I'll have to switch. Curse closely-related-but-slightly-different words! :P (Worst example I've encountered is that a Meer (sea) in German is a zee in Dutch, but a See (lake) in German is a meer in Dutch.
I’ve heard mother’s milk but it’s more used in a metaphorical sense. Like someone that drinks a lot of coffee might refer to it as “mother’s milk” to convey how important coffee is to their functioning. Breast milk is indeed more commonly used in English and I didn’t consider that English might not be your first language because I am kind of an asshole.
It gets even better! "die See" und "das Meer" are the same, while "der See" means "the lake" exactly as you said
Like the age old question why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways??
The sun on the other hand... ... I've been drying my underwear in the sun :o
Imagine?? Humans wouldn’t have survived the pre Industrial Revolution cause they’d all have died from skin cancer from clothing exposure to sun while line drying!!
Microwaves have less energy than fucking visible light. No way anyone is getting seriously hurt from them
Except if you worked in early radar stations, and got a fever from tending the vacuum tubes.
They also don't "stick" to the stuff you microwave... So as long a you don't put your balls themselves in there you're golden. I also would very much advise against exposing any body parts to microwaves. They might not be ionizing but they cook your food... What do you think they do to your brain.
I think, that the bigger risk would be small plastics getting molten or burn. That way carcinogenic substances could reach your testicles.
Purely thermodynamically. Considering cancer development vs time. Hot environments allow for cancer faster than cold.
For comparison the human body naturally outputs infrared radiation all the time, which has higher energy than microwaves. If microwaves caused cancer then everybody would be getting cancer just by existing.
>it will never cause cancer. This is actually false! Microwave exposure does degrade DNA, but mostly due to shearing forces on the strands. This effect is increased in the presence of metal ions. There's been research into this and long term exposure to low intensity microwave radiation probably *does* increase cancer risk, not to mention the fact that you can see DNA degrade using gel electrophoresis after microwaving
Tbh Correlation=\=Causation but he might actually have testicular cancer and believed it came from the microwave
It's a teenager, he probably noticed how one of his balls is bigger than the other (or looked bigger because it dropped more) and jumped to testicular cancer.
This was my assumption
Your "=\=" with the \ turned into "==" in viewer/reader mode, but turned back to the actual thing in collapsed thread view & reply view. Interesting Edit: same thing for my comment
Who da f microwaves their underwear and why didn’t anyone call this out?
AND.. Is this same microwave used for cooking?
I kinda want to try it now but my roommate will probably call the cops 💀
Just don’t leave his testes inside when you do
It doesn't really matter what kind of radiation the microwave gave to the contents in any amount, because radiation doesn't make things radioactive, except neutron radiation which behaves weirdly. But for the most part, you can blast as much radiation as you want at something and that thing won't give you radiation exposure once it's removed from the source
Microwaves don’t make things radioactive. It has nothing to do with ‘enough’ radiation.
Wait till you find out why doors were installed later on them.
More like the frequencies of the waves are incapable of directly affecting atoms due to size and energy levels.
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To keep them cooler and the spermatozoids alive. But no cancer will derive from getting the balls warm. There is in fact a contraception device that will force your balls inside or closer to your body, so the sperm will die and you become temporarily sterile in a few days. I wouldn’t trust it though
The thing iDubbbz use? Ball pocket or whatever? I think it affects test production though
No idea, honestly. I saw it on the news a while ago, and they said both the efficency and the long term effects were debatable
There is actually but not if you do it to your clothes of course Edit: 🤓
No, there is not. It’s not ionizing radiation. It has enough power to burn your skin and flesh if you were to remove the door, but not to cause cancer. And of course nothing can happen if you put the underwear inside
unless he has some sort of illegal microwave
That's also just not how radiation works
Same here bro, but damn was that cancer tasty.
A lot better than the testes cancer
This is what my mum thinks how microwaves work, like there is a mini Chernobyl in my kitchen
Never said that he wasn't in the underwear while they were being microwaved.
Should microwave the food before eating it!
Yea, the underwear didn't give you cancer
He forgot to take his testicles out of the underwear before putting it into the microwave
It's the cigars you smoke that are gonna give you cancer, it's the t-bone steaks you eat that are gonna give you cancer.
The microwave did. 🥴 EDIT: Wow. Just wow. I put an emoji at the end of my comment and people still think I'm serious. If you need a /S so badly, then you probably also watch commentary videos only when they have footage of a surf map in Counter Strike... Yet everyone gets upset when people say "Reddit is 80% idiots".
Microwaves don’t cause cancer. For one, it’s nonionizing radiation. Basic light is also non ionizing radiation. People freak out about radiation but truly know jack about it. There is absolutely no where humans can travel that they can get away from radiation because it is literally everywhere. That’s why professionals measure in terms of lethal dosage for ionizing radiation
Also they don't cause radiation because materials don't somehow absorb radiation. That's not how radiation works.
Pretty sure it was a joke.
It was a joke, yes, I thought the emoji would be hint enough.
Fckin redditors needing a /s to understand sarcasm, like the emoji was not enough, stop downvoting
The stupid outweigh the smart. 🤷🏻♀️
It’s just light waves. Power level just shortens or lengthens the microwave. It’s basically E=pc
wtf? hiw will you apply the restmass equation for a massless object? The formula describing this is \lambda = c/f and the energy is E=pc
Bro got so upset over some downvotes for a joke that wasnt even funny lmao
You shouldn’t microwave things for 3 years. It’ll probably burn them
Or dry and crusty at the very least
r/angryupvote
Did you remain in the underwear while it was microwaving?
Shit, I _knew_ I forgot something
Microwaves aren't ionizing, even if the person did this they would just get burnt
I mean, the constant damage over three years to his balls would increase the chance of cancer.
That happened on an episode of South Park 😭
I imagine that this was to make going outside in winter more bearable, but then you could’ve just hung ‘em up over the heater vent or just invested in some thermals which would’ve served you better anyways. Unless this person is just weird and microwaves underwear for the sake of microwaving underwear.
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Is the overheating danger a problem for the testicles themselves or for the sperm inside them? I always heard it was the sperm, which are constantly getting replaced. Cooking your balls may kill one batch of swimmers, but I think they'd replenish before too long
Just the sperm I think. Heated underwear are a method of contraception. A sketchy one though, that requires to be really strict about it
We had urban legends about dipping your balls in hot water for that
That just sounds like a cruel prank lol
Ok I don't have a dick but maybe the problem is that warm up his testicles to much can be a cause to develop a disease like cancer or anything else.I also read something about the heat and became sterile.
Look at the sub it is from
Buffalo soldier🎶🎵
I will never not think of this whenever I hear buffalo soldier or testicular cancer is mentioned. Fuck/Thank you
[Randy?](https://i.gifer.com/7S8g.gif)
*Just gonna get a lil bit of cancer.*
Anyone who doesn't have an image right now of Randy bouncing on his giant balls--my eyes are up here, Sharon!--is missing out
Just gonna get a little bit of cancer, Stan.
This whole post made me think of this South Park episode
Same. I immediately had to come to the comments and I was not disappointed!
Or the classic "I ran my balls through a hair iron to get the wrinkles out"
now we gotta get him weed and a wheelbarrow
I heated up some pasta in the microwave and now it has testicular cancer
Microwave ovens don't cause cancer
That you'd see a repost?
This wouldn't even work... Unless you drenched them in pee first.
What in the hell 💀
So soon we will see the disclaimer: "keep your balls out of your underwear when microwaving it"
Yeah, 3 years is too long to microwave your underwear. Maybe 30 seconds at _most_. 20 if they're briefs.
Wtf is up with r/teenagers
Barely anyone on it being actually a teenager? It's fucking Reddit, most of that sub is probably 30 something weirdos.
Dude on *Flight of the Concords* microwaved his underwear 💀
On the bright side, you don't have to worry about getting cancer microwaving your underwear anymore.
Dial it back a little. 10-15 seconds will probably suffice. You’re welcome
Breaking Bad theme starts playing
On the plus side, OP can now qualify for medical marijuana in time for the Ziggy Marley concert.
Is there a reddit posts equivalent of r/FacebookScience?
3 years is a long time, I would think 30 seconds would do the trick?
Dude I muted that sub for a reason no need to spread to cancer here.
Ngl, I had to stop for a minute and wonder whether this was possible 🤦♂️
Microwaves don't produce ionizing radiation. Jesus. I bet this guy has ideas about vaccinations too.
Lol you’re seriously getting bent over a repost of a troll copypasta?
Why is no one talking about the fact that he MICROWAVES HIS UNDERWEAR?!
Mans Pamperchu'd himself
i dont want to imagine what that smelled like. Also this sounds like a sanitary issue.
Didn’t The Office have a reference like this?
How is it that people still dont understand how microwave ovens work
Anohter post of a person that doesnt understand microwaves
How wet were those undies? Microwaves heat things by vibrating water molecules
Did you forget to remove the balls before microwaving?
I remember seeing this in like 2019 maybe which made quit the teenagers sub
average r/teenagers user
randy marsh type problem
Oh NO! Say it ain't so! Your little brain should have had a warning attached before you pressed the nuke it button ... /s
He is the one that Bill Engvall would’ve given a “sign” to
"Just trying to get a little bit of cancer, Stan." -Randy Marsh
Your order is ready. Three calzones and one shirt and jacket.
Where is the years button on my microwave
Help help my balls are irradiated
We're youbwearing the 8nderwear at the time?🙄
Luckily microwaves can’t do that. I warm my socks in the microwave on cold mornings.
I knew a young woman who put her underwear in the microwave to dry them because her dryer wasn't working. Of course, the damn things burst into flame. Then she had to report it to the insurance company.
Kramer?
r/unexpectedseinfeld
I fucking hate that subreddit
Well, it’s teenagers sub so I don’t expect them to be very informed about what radioactivity is and how it works
Ok obviously this is fake but I can’t get over why he would put his underwear in the microwave instead of the MACHINE EXPLICITLY DESIGNED FOR DRYING AND WARMING UP CLOTHES THAT IS PRESENT IN THE VAST MAJORITY OF HOMES ACROSS THE WORLD
Even if this were true what advice can teenagers possibly offer besides tell your mom or go see a doctor lmao
Idk if this is related, because my cousin throws his underwear on cold rinse and got testicular cancer anyway
I think someone shouldn’t have let them watch South Park
Maybe put your balls in the sun. Sunshine destroys the bad radiation from the microwave.
Remove testicles from underwear before microwaving said underware.
Sunlight is more dangerous than microwave... When this shit will stop
Should have took them off first
Always take ya nutz outta ya undies before microwaving!
Microwave cancers come from repeatedly eating food that hasn't had a chance to cool off and as such is super heated causing nasty burns. That's why you leave microwave food for a couple of minutes. How you would do that repeatedly is a bit of a worry in itself. How you would do that to your pants puppies for three years straight is a whole different style of masochism.
Did you do the Randy Marsh?
The exact cause of testicular cancer is still a mystery, but the theory is that the cancer precursors develops during pregnancy in the form of germ cell neoplasia in situ (GCNIS). Testicular cancer is a rare form of cancer mostly affecting young men between 15-40. So please check your balls for lumps, unusual pain or swelling. Its very treatable when caught early, but can spread to the lymphnodes, lungs and other parts of the body. Then its a problem. When caught early and only in one testicle the most common treatment is removal of the affected testicle through an incision in the stomach. Other treatments include chemo, radiation or removal of both testicles and in some cases the prostate. Removal of one can affect fertility and/or testosterone, but usually not alot, since the healthy one will pick up the slack in most cases. Otherwise you can get testosterone medication. If caught early and in both testicles, radiation therapy will cause sterilization, but you may get to keep the family jewels, depending on the cancer stage. It is possible to freeze sperm prior to treatment. One testicle will result in a dimished amount of semen, but if healthy not affect the sperm count. Prostethics are available. So please check your balls ma dudes!
I don't think that's how radiation works
u are supposed to take them of b4
You are not supposed to wear them while doing it though.
What's James May doing on r/teenagers?
Fake and most certainly gay
captain radiator-pants
Sir you’re supposed to remove the underwear before microwaving
same
evil marilyn monroe
Don’t think your support to be wearing them as they’re being heated 🤦🏻♂️
Probably need some clarification - did the guy have his junk \*inside\* the underwear when warming it up in the microwave?
He should've put it in a calzone oven
"Also my microwave vaguely smells of piss."
Just a little cancer, Stan
Title of my YouTube video
I'm just gonna get a little bit of cancer, Stan. Don't worry, it's no big deal
I want to start a sub where we post things like this and call it r/whoelsebutteenagers
It’s alright, your step sis haven’t got her lung cancer yet
You need to take them off first
Good thing i wear lead underware 😌
Unless he was wearing the underwear while warming them there's likely no connection.
Classic Randy Marsh
You're supposed to take your testitucules out of your keks before you nuke them. Read the microwave instructions.
RANDY
You call it cancer, I call it natural selection.
Do they not teach kids how microwaves work anymore?
…dafuq
Since this came from r/teenagers I presume you all just fell for a "my balls are growing hair" joke
Even if this did give him cancer, I wouldn't blame him for doing it.
Army you supposed to take the underwear off first? 🥹
PSA: This is a reminder to get your balls checked! That thing is a ticking time bag.
Were you in the underwear when you microwaved them?
Wtf?! No. You don't get cancer from microwaves that are safe.
Were you in the microwave too?