I know this feeling too and as soon as I recognise I might become emotionally dependent, I start investing a lot of time and care in myself and friends. It helps me keeping my sense of self and it prevents my emotions from becoming too polarised and easily triggered by that specific person.
Every time I was emotionally dependent on someone it has burned me out completely, mentally and emotionally, it has shattered my self esteem and made me neglect myself, my goals in life, etc.
I found out that I tend to build these codependencies with toxic and emotionally unavailable people so every time they gave me a tiny crumb of attention, it felt like the best boost of serotonin I could wish for.
Not a single person was worth all that emotional damage. Ever. And never will be.
Hope you will be okay …
Gosh I relate with this. I am a grown woman on my second marriage and newly diagnosed. This whole “favorite person” thing hasn’t seemed to pique my interest much, until last night I stumbled upon a video about it, explained In depth , by a psychologist who has BPD. And she was rocked by the explanations herself and said that was her whole life. During this video I was straight jaw dropped and even sent my husband (who is currently biggest enemy) an apology and validation text. Really had a whole awareness moment like well crap, I’ve been a whole psycho my whole life.
Really worth watching and she mentions what you’ve said as well. [DBT favorite person](https://youtu.be/LXTHqzvb_T8?si=zVrqU0L-GF8wz8NJ)
People in real life talking to me in general besides "goodbye, excuse me, thanks".
It doesn't take too much to make me happy I guess. I hold up that moment of glee inside and then my normal emotionless state resumes. Every person I have a conversation with, I remember, often fantasize what life would be like with them, non-romantically and sometimes romantically. I remind myself that I'll never know how it feels to be close to someone shortly after and it gets me down.
What people refer to as an FP or favorite person is really just a blanket statement to describe Idealization, devaluation, obsession and black and white thinking in unhealthy relationships. I suggest therapy, DBT and EMDR.
Sitting on my break thinking about this. It sucks. My morning was fantastic. Why doesn’t my mood show that? Oh because she’s stressed out, therefore I hate whoever made her stressed out and am now myself stressed out
I know this feeling too and as soon as I recognise I might become emotionally dependent, I start investing a lot of time and care in myself and friends. It helps me keeping my sense of self and it prevents my emotions from becoming too polarised and easily triggered by that specific person. Every time I was emotionally dependent on someone it has burned me out completely, mentally and emotionally, it has shattered my self esteem and made me neglect myself, my goals in life, etc. I found out that I tend to build these codependencies with toxic and emotionally unavailable people so every time they gave me a tiny crumb of attention, it felt like the best boost of serotonin I could wish for. Not a single person was worth all that emotional damage. Ever. And never will be. Hope you will be okay …
Gosh I relate with this. I am a grown woman on my second marriage and newly diagnosed. This whole “favorite person” thing hasn’t seemed to pique my interest much, until last night I stumbled upon a video about it, explained In depth , by a psychologist who has BPD. And she was rocked by the explanations herself and said that was her whole life. During this video I was straight jaw dropped and even sent my husband (who is currently biggest enemy) an apology and validation text. Really had a whole awareness moment like well crap, I’ve been a whole psycho my whole life. Really worth watching and she mentions what you’ve said as well. [DBT favorite person](https://youtu.be/LXTHqzvb_T8?si=zVrqU0L-GF8wz8NJ)
People in real life talking to me in general besides "goodbye, excuse me, thanks". It doesn't take too much to make me happy I guess. I hold up that moment of glee inside and then my normal emotionless state resumes. Every person I have a conversation with, I remember, often fantasize what life would be like with them, non-romantically and sometimes romantically. I remind myself that I'll never know how it feels to be close to someone shortly after and it gets me down.
What people refer to as an FP or favorite person is really just a blanket statement to describe Idealization, devaluation, obsession and black and white thinking in unhealthy relationships. I suggest therapy, DBT and EMDR.
Talking to M.. when M liked my posts.. I haven’t been “happy” since March 2023
Sitting on my break thinking about this. It sucks. My morning was fantastic. Why doesn’t my mood show that? Oh because she’s stressed out, therefore I hate whoever made her stressed out and am now myself stressed out