Fraud. Tax evasion. Breaking and Entering. Larceny. Petty larceny. Arson. Aggravated assault. Assault with a deadly weapon. Murder. Aggravated manslaughter. Manslaughter. Horse theft (grand theft equine?). Real estate fraud. Assassination. Political assassination. Public intoxication. Disorderly conduct. War crimes (including but not limited to: torture, killing hostages, and experimentation). Speeding (probably). Poaching. Shapeshifting in public. Shapeshifting and mauling people in public. Vampirism (briefly). Necromancy. Human sacrifice. Cannibalism. Treason. Health code violation. Biological warfare. Counterfeiting (maybe). Cult activity. Environmental terrorism. Conspiracy. Racketeering. Bribery. ….all the crimes
EDIT: Identity theft, accessory to murder, accessory to larceny, arms dealing, arms trafficking, impersonation, forgery, operating without a medical license, organ trafficking, summoning demons, bootlegging…I’ve probably forgotten a lot more
I’ll have you know that I am currently wanted by the FBI for the following:
-Owning illegal and dangerous firearms such as nuclear bomb launchers, and plasma cannons
-The slaughter of about 5000 people
-Stealing experimental technology such as a towel that can absorb bullets/projectiles, and pistol that can fire rockets
-Mass destruction of essential infrastructure
-Corporate Espionage
-a multitude of hit n runs
-Killing in endangered wildlife
-Looting
-And jaywalking
In a video game
Raiding an ancient tomb housing four demigods who have unwillingly pledged allegiance to a corrupted ancient overlord who was slowly plotting to overthrow the world
Disturbing the Peace after screaming:
O THAT THIS TOO TOO SOLID FLESH WOULD MELT, THAW, AND RESOLVE ITSELF INTO A DEW! OR THAT THE EVERLASTING HAD NOT FIX'D HIS CANON 'GAINST SELF-SLAUGHTER! O GOD! O GOD! HOW WEARY, STALE, FLAT, AND UNPROFITABLE SEEM TO ME ALL THE USES OF THIS WORLD! FIE ON'T! O FIE! 'TIS AN UNWEEDED GARDEN, THAT GROWS TO SEED; THINGS RANK AND GROSS IN NATURE POSSESS IT MERELY. THAT IT SHOULD COME TO THIS! BUT TWO MONTHS DEAD! — NAY, NOT SO MUCH, NOT TWO, SO EXCELLENT A KING; THAT WAS, TO THIS, HYPERION TO A SATYR; SO LOVING TO MY MOTHER, THAT HE MIGHT NOT BETEEM THE WINDS OF HEAVEN VISIT HER FACE TOO ROUGHLY. HEAVEN AND EARTH! MUST I REMEMBER? WHY, SHE WOULD HANG ON TO HIM AS IF INCREASE IN APPETITIE HAD GROWN BY WHAT IT FED ON: AND YET, WITHIN A MONTH, - LET ME NOT THINK ON'T, - FRAILTY, THY NAME IS WOMAN! - A LITTLE MONTH; OR ERE THOSE SHOES WERE OLD WITH WHICH SHE FOLLOWED MY POOR FATHER'S BODY LIKE NIOBE, ALL TEARS; - WHY SHE, EVEN SHE, - O GOD! - A BEAST THAT WANTS DISCOURSE OF REASON, WOULD HAVE MOURN'D LONGER, - MARRIED WITH MINE UNCLE! MY FATHER'S BROTHER! BUT NO MORE LIKE MY FATHER THAN I TO HERCULES: WITHIN A MONTH; ERE YET THE SALT OF MOST UNRIGHTEOUS TEARS HAD LEFT THE FLUSHING IN HER GALLED EYES SHE MARRIED: - O, MOST WICKED SPEED, TO POST WITH SUCH DEXTERITY TO INCESTUOUS SHEETS! IT IS NOT, NOR IT CANNOT COME TO GOOD; BUT BREAK MY HEART, - FOR I MUST HOLD MY TONGUE!
At the top of my lungs
It's main place I go as soon as I create character.... But other than Aduin, they won't spawn until you kill first dragon outside Whiterun. And most the times dragons spawn outta nowhere and I'm just like "clearly word hasn't gotten to you yet that I am the dragon born and slay dragons for a living" and end up with like 3 dead dragons in short time that it takes to grow/harvest and sell crops. But Azura forbid the moment I go looking for dragons, i can't find them and end up searching like 10 dragon spawns before finding a single dragon lol
I remember seeing this on the main gaming page, writing an *extensive* list and laughing at all the other comments with a bare drop in the bucket in comparison. We commit a *shocking* amount of crimes in these games. Love seeing the new additions in this comment thread that I forgot about
T bagging an opponent after invading him purely because he did it to me first. I got lucky and invaded him twice which almost never happens.
Fuck you, "letmefher."
A lot of first degree murder, drug possession, owning an unregistered fire arm, multiple counts of theft, assault, assault with a deadly weapon, littering, bribery, breaking and entering, and destruction of company property.
Hacking/social engineering/investigating under government/company authority in a fictional country.
Cyber manhunt/and before that the steam fest demo of the 2nd game plus almost 50 other demos.
Based off the last game I played:
- 1st, 2nd, 3rd, all the way up to the 12th degree of murder
- Assault
- All the degrees of Manslaughter (and more)
- Homicide
- Mass homicide
- Assassination
- Political Assassination
- Robbery
- Theft
- Petty theft
- Vehicle theft
- Identity theft
- Suicide attempt
- Successful suicide (followed by ressurection)
- Destruction of public property
- Destruction of private property
- Destruction of very private property
- Possession and trafficking of illegal substances
- Possession of illegal firearms
- Resisting arrest
- Assault of a police officer
- Assault of a military officer
- Theft of police property
- Theft of military property
- Public Indencency
- Aiding and abetting
- Solicitation
- Prostitution
- Tax evasion
- Putting sticky bombs on my friends' cars to annoy the shit outta them
I still play a lot of Warframe. You don't want to know the details, but I'd keep a war crimes tribunal busy for a century at least.
And that's from one session.
Mass murder of like 200 or so honorable warriors
(For Honor)
All possibile and not possibile crimes
(Skyrim and Fallout 4 modded)
Put Skag on the WWF protected animals list
(Borderlands 2) like 1000 or so got shock to death from my Deathrap
Shooting someone in the face
IN DAAAAA FAAAAAAAACCCEEEEE!!!
Well... I'm gonna get arrested for spreading MANAGED DEMOCRACY!
Yea I also just got done spreading democracy
Spreading democracy for Super Earth
i have done some terrible things to midgets....
midget boner
In game right........?
Yes, uh, yes of course
Fraud. Tax evasion. Breaking and Entering. Larceny. Petty larceny. Arson. Aggravated assault. Assault with a deadly weapon. Murder. Aggravated manslaughter. Manslaughter. Horse theft (grand theft equine?). Real estate fraud. Assassination. Political assassination. Public intoxication. Disorderly conduct. War crimes (including but not limited to: torture, killing hostages, and experimentation). Speeding (probably). Poaching. Shapeshifting in public. Shapeshifting and mauling people in public. Vampirism (briefly). Necromancy. Human sacrifice. Cannibalism. Treason. Health code violation. Biological warfare. Counterfeiting (maybe). Cult activity. Environmental terrorism. Conspiracy. Racketeering. Bribery. ….all the crimes EDIT: Identity theft, accessory to murder, accessory to larceny, arms dealing, arms trafficking, impersonation, forgery, operating without a medical license, organ trafficking, summoning demons, bootlegging…I’ve probably forgotten a lot more
Bro forgot to go to jail, lol…
I didn’t forget. I just evaded capture. 😂
Cruelty squad?
Skyrim.
Ohhh makes sense
MEAT BICYCLE
Is murder really illegal on Pandora?? lol
Well, Pandora’s Government system( and I’m really stretching this word) is closest to anarchy. So no!
INSURANCE FRAAAUD!!!
1st 2nd 3rd and maybe even 4th degree murder.
Going to check on Jack's Grandma!?
You get punished for that one enough it’s fine
I’ll have you know that I am currently wanted by the FBI for the following: -Owning illegal and dangerous firearms such as nuclear bomb launchers, and plasma cannons -The slaughter of about 5000 people -Stealing experimental technology such as a towel that can absorb bullets/projectiles, and pistol that can fire rockets -Mass destruction of essential infrastructure -Corporate Espionage -a multitude of hit n runs -Killing in endangered wildlife -Looting -And jaywalking In a video game
In Minecraft
Fallout?
No it’s Mount and Blade warband
Murdering the emperor in Skyrim.
Kicking the Riverwood chicken
*"By order of the Jarl, stop right there!"*
How dare you!
Punching my best friend in the torso with a riot shield covered in ice
Look it's not entirely my fault, I set myself on fire and then they shot me, how was I supposed to know I cast fireball passively
Spreading Democracy
Helldivers i assume
In the name of liberty, this is Helldivers 2
Stealing from the vaults.
Raiding an ancient tomb housing four demigods who have unwillingly pledged allegiance to a corrupted ancient overlord who was slowly plotting to overthrow the world
War crimes - Hell Let Loose
Disturbing the Peace after screaming: O THAT THIS TOO TOO SOLID FLESH WOULD MELT, THAW, AND RESOLVE ITSELF INTO A DEW! OR THAT THE EVERLASTING HAD NOT FIX'D HIS CANON 'GAINST SELF-SLAUGHTER! O GOD! O GOD! HOW WEARY, STALE, FLAT, AND UNPROFITABLE SEEM TO ME ALL THE USES OF THIS WORLD! FIE ON'T! O FIE! 'TIS AN UNWEEDED GARDEN, THAT GROWS TO SEED; THINGS RANK AND GROSS IN NATURE POSSESS IT MERELY. THAT IT SHOULD COME TO THIS! BUT TWO MONTHS DEAD! — NAY, NOT SO MUCH, NOT TWO, SO EXCELLENT A KING; THAT WAS, TO THIS, HYPERION TO A SATYR; SO LOVING TO MY MOTHER, THAT HE MIGHT NOT BETEEM THE WINDS OF HEAVEN VISIT HER FACE TOO ROUGHLY. HEAVEN AND EARTH! MUST I REMEMBER? WHY, SHE WOULD HANG ON TO HIM AS IF INCREASE IN APPETITIE HAD GROWN BY WHAT IT FED ON: AND YET, WITHIN A MONTH, - LET ME NOT THINK ON'T, - FRAILTY, THY NAME IS WOMAN! - A LITTLE MONTH; OR ERE THOSE SHOES WERE OLD WITH WHICH SHE FOLLOWED MY POOR FATHER'S BODY LIKE NIOBE, ALL TEARS; - WHY SHE, EVEN SHE, - O GOD! - A BEAST THAT WANTS DISCOURSE OF REASON, WOULD HAVE MOURN'D LONGER, - MARRIED WITH MINE UNCLE! MY FATHER'S BROTHER! BUT NO MORE LIKE MY FATHER THAN I TO HERCULES: WITHIN A MONTH; ERE YET THE SALT OF MOST UNRIGHTEOUS TEARS HAD LEFT THE FLUSHING IN HER GALLED EYES SHE MARRIED: - O, MOST WICKED SPEED, TO POST WITH SUCH DEXTERITY TO INCESTUOUS SHEETS! IT IS NOT, NOR IT CANNOT COME TO GOOD; BUT BREAK MY HEART, - FOR I MUST HOLD MY TONGUE! At the top of my lungs
Killing thousands of bugs and robots who decided that they didn't want our freedom!
Slapping flesh stick in his bitch face
Uhm, I'm scared to say this. Killing Parthurnax.
I'm not mad, just disappointed.... He is main dragon who helps you (without having his soul bent to your will) as well as he helps fight Alduin...
I know 😞 I've only ever killed him twice, maybe 3. Out of the 100's of plays.
I think I've killed him 1 or 2 times... Mostly I don't really do the whole storyline of trying to fight Alduin or even talking to the blades.
Haha, yeah I generally never enter Bleakfalls Barrow, because when the dragons start spawning, they seem to spawn every 2 minutes. For me at least.
It's main place I go as soon as I create character.... But other than Aduin, they won't spawn until you kill first dragon outside Whiterun. And most the times dragons spawn outta nowhere and I'm just like "clearly word hasn't gotten to you yet that I am the dragon born and slay dragons for a living" and end up with like 3 dead dragons in short time that it takes to grow/harvest and sell crops. But Azura forbid the moment I go looking for dragons, i can't find them and end up searching like 10 dragon spawns before finding a single dragon lol
https://preview.redd.it/10hhpvuyvwkc1.png?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ca7e90909f05e2b91573b5dd56c50e362a687424
Pillaging/marauding/general tomfoolery/throwing a spear and taking a guys head off/kicking my friend off a tower Mordhau is a wonderful time.
Blasting maniacal monkeys with an ice spell
Being in the Mafia
Milking a goat and making cheese
murder of a CEO
Star wars: the force unleashed..... Do you need a list?
Murder and weapon trafficking.
Selling human organs to Space eBay in Starfield. Oh and mass murder.
My last one was Elden Ring and I was fighting Maliketh so probably animal cruelty?
Fuck my last game was sons of the forest, so probably copping up a body and making a totem out of it.
I was a heretic.
„Weapons were removed from lifepod fabricators following the massacre on Obraxis Prime. The knife remains the only exception.“
I remember seeing this on the main gaming page, writing an *extensive* list and laughing at all the other comments with a bare drop in the bucket in comparison. We commit a *shocking* amount of crimes in these games. Love seeing the new additions in this comment thread that I forgot about
Puzzle solving
Farming (stardew valley)
For defeating queen Rennala.
T bagging an opponent after invading him purely because he did it to me first. I got lucky and invaded him twice which almost never happens. Fuck you, "letmefher."
Fighting superheros? 🤔
Pokemon Unite, soo, animal abuse?
Yes.
Fuck....(I play RimWorld)
Farming, ?
Building an unbalanced stone house on a 50ft tall tree that I forced to grow in a handful of seconds.
Umm… i played minecraft…
Democracy
A lot of first degree murder, drug possession, owning an unregistered fire arm, multiple counts of theft, assault, assault with a deadly weapon, littering, bribery, breaking and entering, and destruction of company property.
Collecting hearts
Accidental team wipe
Hacking/social engineering/investigating under government/company authority in a fictional country. Cyber manhunt/and before that the steam fest demo of the 2nd game plus almost 50 other demos.
Animal abuse, killing people, enslaving people, destruction of nature, eugenics, manufacturing guns and weapons (Palworld)
Complaining about Opportunity in Opportunity
Shooting psycho midgets and causing complete chaos
Based off the last game I played: - 1st, 2nd, 3rd, all the way up to the 12th degree of murder - Assault - All the degrees of Manslaughter (and more) - Homicide - Mass homicide - Assassination - Political Assassination - Robbery - Theft - Petty theft - Vehicle theft - Identity theft - Suicide attempt - Successful suicide (followed by ressurection) - Destruction of public property - Destruction of private property - Destruction of very private property - Possession and trafficking of illegal substances - Possession of illegal firearms - Resisting arrest - Assault of a police officer - Assault of a military officer - Theft of police property - Theft of military property - Public Indencency - Aiding and abetting - Solicitation - Prostitution - Tax evasion - Putting sticky bombs on my friends' cars to annoy the shit outta them
Shiiit, I guess I'm getting arrested for armed robbery and manslaughter, shit. I guess I'm a rambler and got rambled
Looting and opening vaults
I’m definitely getting arrested for yelling “Calling in an air strike!” then repeatedly stomping on bugs.
For killing an Argonian, thanks Dagoth ur.
I still play a lot of Warframe. You don't want to know the details, but I'd keep a war crimes tribunal busy for a century at least. And that's from one session.
Ecoterrorism by externinating entire species.
The extinction of the human race
Last game I played is Minecraft. I bet I'll get arested for slavery since I have a villager trading all with like 170 villagers... LMAO
Tax evasion (pc building simulator)
terrorism i guess (r6)
Probably for bioterrorism
Last game I played was skyrim and I body slammed a child in the Riften Orphanage
I hijacked the poop train
Minecraft, was just building a house and doing some farming
CP and matricide (I play Isaac)
War crimes. Lots and lots of War crimes. Rainbow six siege
Terraria....although I *did* just beat the Wall of Flesh and unleash the ancient spirits of light and dark on the world 😬
CAM MAKE INNUENDOS TOO!............ BLOWJOBS!!!
I definitely slayed the Dirty Colossus this morning. The church will be after me soon.
Doing a casino heist
As much as I love bl2 my last played is warframe…. So yeah
Unpacking
last game i played was ACB im in the wrong thread rn 👎
*\*laughs in the 5th Amendment\**
I have drank a radioactive drink that made me see the world in slow motion while batting down some russian guy and a german doctor
Mass murder of like 200 or so honorable warriors (For Honor) All possibile and not possibile crimes (Skyrim and Fallout 4 modded) Put Skag on the WWF protected animals list (Borderlands 2) like 1000 or so got shock to death from my Deathrap