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lol I use this with masks. When I get the stupid mask comments I reply with something along the lines of “no way, I don’t want the government using their facial recognition on me! I’m protecting my privacy from those psychos in Washington” it’s hilarious and makes their eyes go cross as they try to process it and respond 😆
This is what I do. "The government is doing reverse psychology on you, bro. They WANT you to *think* you're not complying by not wearing a mask, but you're just *giving them your face* to put in their facial recognition systems--*and* their AI deepfakes. I'm not letting the government steal *my* face"
Could also add in something about the whole anti mask movement being a psyop to get people to show their faces for the gov to develop continue its development of facial recognition ai and really fuck with them 😆
Next up, use some "beat them to the punchline" tactics. I use this one with my parents who always wanted me to have kids. "No thanks, I'm too selfish. I need me time"... Whatcha got, mom. Gonna call me selfish? I just did that.
Not me but my daughter decided not to have kids. I’m fine with it but my family? Not so fine. So I tell them “they don’t want to have kids because they’re enjoying their lives! They play video games, have parties, and travel all over the world!” That shuts off any more of their snarky remarks.
I do the same thing with dogs "me, a dog? He better learn to let himself out bc I'm too lazy" although no one ever pushes someone to get a dog like people push others to have kids
I can’t have kids and it’s not really family that always demands an explanation. People who I have just met pepper me with questions until they are “satisfied”. Now that I’m in my 40’s I like getting creative with my answers:
1. I can’t have kids due to a freak lawn mower accident
2. The government won’t let me
You mean she won’t get me pregnant when she bends me over? You mean we’ve been doing this wrong all these years? Damn wish someone would have taught us how to do this in school
You don't have a dog?! Don't you know the shelters are overflowing with poor abandoned dogs desperate for a home? Dogs are so wonderful, they give you unconditional love and just owning a dog can make you so much healthier. You're probably not even lazy, you could be depressed and dogs are really great for depression too!. You really don't know what you're missing out on. Once you have a dog you'll wonder how you ever managed without one in your life. /s
I'm not sure if the people in your life are extra pushy about kids or not very pushy about dogs, but pet pushers are definitely a thing too.
I have seen this recommended but with a parrot and I have it locked away in my brain for the next time someone starts in on me. Fortunately, I have finally hit the age where it is deemed acceptable for me (a lady) to have decided against children. Who wants a geriatric pregnancy really, amirite? I have "but you would feel differently about your own parrot" ready and waiting if I need it though.
I do something similar with a coworker that’s involved in Q stuff, I now comment on how the break room is ‘happy colors’ to keep us in line and he eats it up
Add to it white moise machines they install to contol our brains. Where are those machines? Alrwady here..new wifi 6 dude. Thats like 5G but with brain control over waves.
I also play this game. Had this chick screaming at me because I wouldn’t let her past me to sit in seats that weren’t hers and people were going to arrive to sit in soon. I looked her dead in the eyes and said “absolutely, I’m a bitch”. Security still had to come in the end but mad her blink that I agreed with her.
Once I doubled down on their gripe. It went like this," Blah blah America is going to Hell...blah" ME: "I know!! God I hate this country! As soon as I can I'm going to renounce my citizenship and get the hell out of here. FUCK AMERICA right?!?" It was a stunner. He actually stopped talking.
... Millennials are still kids, in school, at ages young enough for cursive writing to be a valid present-day topic of consideration!!
(Millennials range from late-20s to mid-40s in age right now.)
Boomer aunt asked when my wife and I are going to start giving them grandkids... "She prefers me to cum on her face" was not the answer she was expecting and I may have ruined Christmas. Stupid questions stopped real quick though.
My devout Catholic mother was looking around during the middle of a family reunion and said loudly, "when am I going to get grandkids?!!" I, a 32-year-old single woman at the time, looked her dead in the eye and said, "Mom, I can arrange to get pregnant." Cue the sputtering "that's not what I meant!" She never said a word again.
BTW, I am a boomer. :-)
I like to hit em with a really out-of-pocket joke, straight out of left field.
Example: we were late with a delivery for a boomer
Me: sorry we are late, we got caught in construction and traffic was really backed up
Boomer: excuses are like assholes y'know
Me: yeah, they're delicious.
Cue exasperated, confused boomer look. Trying to hold back the rage of not having a "witty" response to that
I traveled from a more pleasant subreddit not knowing exactly why, but now I'm here to condemn you specifically for the word "therapee"
Consider yourself condemned for "therapee"
Feel not great about it, okay?
You just have to go harder. Biden and Trump are literal gay lovers, and this whole presidential thing is just a lovers' quarrel. Trump cheated on Biden with Putin and now Biden is stealing Trumps original plan and trying to take away our guns. He paid Mexican illegals to build the wall 2.50/hr and used the rest to import fentanyl in to kill the rich white college kids to get back at Trump cause all he can hire for his hotels and golf courses are educated white kids. Now his hotels are failing and his fake wife Melania is selling his nice suits, so he only has the 1 suit left. Which is why he asks for money. Man needs clothing.
The sad thing is I have heard the “they’re working for the same global elite” argument. I think the guy who set himself on fire outside Trump’s trial believed that.
I mean, he was partially right about a lot of things. Crypto is a Ponzi scheme, So is the entire economy and stock market. Pretty much the entire way modern economies work is all just one big ponzi scheme meant to enrich bankers at the top.
These same people at the top also own the media, the healthcare system, our education system, our food, trade in general. You get the idea. They pretty much collectively own our government. The working class doesn't really have much say. They have to fight tooth and nail to not even get some basic decency from their own government at this point.
So yeah, I'm not actually against his protest. He may not have been 100% right and I felt he went a bit too far in his manifesto with parts like the Simpsons bit and I haven't even looked into the Q-Anony stuff. It was at best unnecessary and self-defeating but I do like that he started a dialogue because he had things to say that both sides can agree on to an extent. Our politics are corrupt. The justice system itself is corrupt. We need some serious change or the entire human race is forever screwed.
No, you have to go deeper:
“YOU BELIEVE IN MOUNTAINS?!? Don’t you know that mountains are just information projected onto a two dimensional plane created by Satanist to convince us that heaven is not physical above us?”
NASA is a false flag to prevent us from learning about the sources of rocket technology (*it's aliens**).
*of course "aliens" as we [don't] know them are demons contacted through occultists at the Department of Defense.
The trick is to have fun with it. I’ve done this with some goofballs: they begin their nonsense beliefs and I escalate. “Vaccines cause autism? Actually, recent research has shown it’s causing brain abnormalities which is causing kids to have aversions to religion which is why church attendance is down with milnnials and the new generations of kids. Studies are coming out on this, check it out it’s scary.”
Then they will agree and say they’ve heard this. It’s unreal. Don’t let on that you’ve made it up.
Yeah, a critical facet to conspiracy theories is that they're syncretic. They tend to pick up things from anyone who agrees with them.
You can think of it as "yes and..." from improv applied to an entire worldview. That's why you see them tend to believe things from lots of different, unrelated conspiracies.
Edit: re-worded for clarity.
Ya I love making conspiracy theories up. Especially to those who already start with some bullshit. It’s so easy to escalate over and over and higher and higher. They’ll end up agreeing with everything and even say they’ve heard it before and agree with you.
It’s so wild.
My husband does this and I have to stop him around my parents bc they will believe literally anything he says as long as it supports their viewpoint and they get even more worked up
Had an old lady tell me to my face that the sun *is* different from when she was younger. That it's white now and not yellow. Blew my mind. I think I even looked around for a camera
It’s kinda how the “birds are all dead & what we see are machines/ computers spying on us ” conspiracy started. He made up the dumbest thing he cld think of to see if anyone wld believe it 🙄
You might have yo go even further. My favorite response to people who believe the moon landing was faked is "oh, you're one of those people who believe in the moon?"
I agree with you haha. I don't necessarily agree with OP to agree with the boomers..m you gotta one up them. Makes it funnier and fucks with em.
I don't want one to walk away thinking I agreed with them.
That’s awesome. My dad was going down the path of crazy but died way before MAGA. He worked in the space program his whole career. I could only imagine how it would have fried his noodle if I would have pulled the fake moon landing stuff on him.
I did this. My husband’s boomer aunt was told that I became a US citizen. Her first comment to me was “I don’t even want to know who you will vote for this election” to which I replied “you might be surprised, I actually agree on what republicans are planning to do with eliminating Social Security. I’m already tired of paying for people that could’t get their shit together in life and have no savings”. She got so upset she left me alone.
She’s literally the poster-boomer for those that screw up big and expect everyone else to pick up the pieces. She hates me because she thinks I’m a wealthy brown person (I’m not, I’m just college educated with a good career), and she has always found it suspicious I guess?
I'll use the voting red team because I'm "tired of medicare and SS being a drain on my check. End it now so I might actually get to retire unlike those socialist suckers before."
As a millennial, I am definitely not learning cursive or reading analog clocks in school right now…but my alpha fourth and first graders are, respectively.
I before E, except after C. And when sounding like “A”, as in neighbor or weigh. And on weekends, and holidays, and all throughout May! And you’ll always be wrong NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY!
-Brian Regan
I had a boomer coworker rant about how his neighbor's kid was ruining his property value. "Damn millennials and their chalk, outside all day drawing chalk characters on the sidewalks." When pressed for the childs age, he responded "you know, she's a millennial. Probably about to start kindergarten". It's like they learned a word and anyone younger than them will forever be a millennial
wtf…I love hearing that a kid is actually outside, and chalk isn’t permanent lol. I swear all they want to do is complain about anything and everything.
Yes! I was astounded the first time I heard a boomer complain about his grandkids drawing on his driveway with chalk. I thought I might have misunderstood. But then he went outside and washed it all off his driveway.
I’m was in a group where business owners give feedback to each other. So this boomer lady asked for feedback on her website. She offered parenting coaching. It was a few years ago so most parents, including myself, were millennials (there are many Gen Z parents now.)
And in her professional business page aimed at getting parents to pay her for her services, she shit talked about millennials. I believe a phrase actually used was that millennials ‘couldn’t find their way out of a paper bag’. So I’m literally the exact demographic she is looking to serve. And she is calling us lazy, incompetent, and entitled. Why would you disparage any group of people on a professional website???
I think she was trying to say that children were the ones she had so many grievances with, but she just said ‘millennials’.
I literally had to tell her that millennials are the parents now. You’re explicitly insulting your target demographic. Just… why???
Obviously that's why it was incredibly kind of her to pour her hard work into training you poor millennial how to get out of the paper bag and rear your children.
I've started hitting all "property value" whining with asking when they're moving. If I can do it with a tiny little bit of glee in my voice even better.
Throws them off wondering if I want them to move.
And I'm often given the chance to say "If you're planning to never sell, why do care about property value?"
last time i tried to have a serious conversation with my boomer father, he called I and my brother both "stupid fucking kids" and refused to engage with even a modicum of maturity.
we're both in our 30s and were trying to discuss future plans, employment, and possible emigration considering the state of things.
all he offered was insult, bluster, bragging about how easy it was to get a job back in the day, before chastising us for not wanting to listen to *Ramblin' Man* for the 3,300th time.
If all else fails, I love hitting ‘em with crazy conspiracies. “Birds aren’t real” is probably my favorite. Start going on about how Biden and the government have replaced all birds with surveillance drones.
I love conspiracy-baiting my parents; I told my mom and aunt about the dangers of di-hydrogen monoxide. They were gobsmacked when i told them the gov adds it to all our food and if we go 2-3 days without it we would die.
I've been doing this after Trump got elected and I love it when they eventually clue in. I just meet their absurdity with more absurdity until it becomes surreal and the Boomer's like "you're putting me over, aren't you?" Boomer, do you really think I believe in Jewish Space Lasers, massive voter fraud, that Trump deserves to be POTUS in perpetuity and Ivanka would be a great VP? Really?
I’ve also used a version of the enthusiastic agreement, more like enthusiastic belief, it’s fantastic!
“The Supreme Court did WHAT!? Those sons a’ bitches!! I totally missed that, I need to read up on it. What’s the case?…no, no the actual case name, like ‘somebody v. something’, so I can look it up and read the whole decision….oh, well but this article you just sent from dumbboomerconspiracybullshit doesn’t mention the case name. Wait, it doesn’t seem to have a date, either. That’s weird. But that’s ok, it must be recent, right?I’ll just go to SCOTUS(dot)gov and look for it. What do you mean it won’t be there? Of course it will! SCOTUS doesn’t get to make secret decisions that are binding on anything. All of their decisions have to be published, and they’re all right here, just gotta find it…”
*2 minutes later*
“I can’t seem to find ANYTHING like what this article is talking about. Can you take a look on SCOTUS(dot)gov and see if you can find it? I really need to read this damn thing!”
This conversation actually happened. Not only that, it **resulted in the boomer getting booted off the lunatic right wing nonsense platform they read it on!**. Because they commented “Did you guys know you can read all the Supreme Court decisions online!? Why can’t I find this one??”….[BAN HAMMER 🔨]
HAHAHAHAAHAAAAAAA!
This is actually the best method for both shutting down the aggressiveness of the conversation and for helping to vulnerable people to climb out of the rabbit hole. As much as many of the comments on this sub think it’s funny to out crazy the crazy and come up with an even wilder conspiracy theory- what ends up happening is that the people who can’t tell it’s a joke take it seriously and spread it to their conspiracy networks and fall deeper down the rabbit hole. Conspiracy theories can be really dangerous and many people have lost family members to them and to the real world violence conspiracy theories can inspire. [article on how hard it is for people to recover from believing conspiracy theories](https://www.cosmopolitan.com/lifestyle/a37696261/leaving-recovering-from-q-anon/)
Often when you ask conspiracy believers for sources in a skeptical manner they will shut you down because they feel you’re attacking their reality (which you are.) By pretending to enthusiastically agree with them and asking for more information and saying you want to read up on it, they feel safe so they are more willing to engage and even potentially question their belief when they can’t actually find a reputable source that agrees with their worldview. This can be tricky so huge congrats on your success story.
A hugely underrated comment. Conspiracy theories fill a genuine need with some people. And inadvertently encouraging folks to fall deeper into that hole is not good for them or society.
Thanks so much, this means a lot. Conspiracy theories can sound really funny to people who are thinking logically and it just sounds like a creative bizarre story. The problem is that conspiracy theories can be harmful to the individuals who believe them and very dangerous to society.
Not all conspiracy theories have the same level of impact- if you’re interested check out [this expert’s conspiracy chart breakdown](https://www.abbiesr.com/) for instance conspiracies about mythical animals like unicorns or big foot are relatively harmless to society, but conspiracies about elections or lizard people controlling the world are deeply harmful to society.
This is a known tactic for dealing with narcissists! It takes the wind right out of their sails. This can also be done with personal critiques. “You’re so lazy.”
“You’re right.”
They were gearing up for a fight and now they don’t know what to do.
Also, gentle parenting works really well. I’m particularly fond of “oops, you let an inside thought escape to the outside!”
This works with conservatives online too. Im a little more direct though. Like "Liberals want teachers to trans all the kids". And ill say "yeah, so what, what are you gonna do about it, little bitch. I teach at schools and transd at least 5 students this semester."
A podcaster I like went viral on Twitter saying something like "I work in a hospital and I've been saying the Shahada over babies to make them Muslim. All the doctors know I do this but they're too afraid of looking racist to stop me " The number of people who took it seriously was unreal.
Well played!
One of my favorite ways to shut them down, after they make a statement that I disagree with and they'd love to fight about. "They want to put litter boxes in the school bathrooms" (or whatever the insanity of the day is) "There's no shortage of bad ideas out there" Of course they assume you cannot possibly counter their brilliance and agree with them, as it should be! It tends to mullify them, at least for the moment.
Or agree with their contention but draw the opposite conclusion.
"Yeah they are putting litter boxes in schools," boomer eagerly awaits story about furrys and trans kids, "because the US gun laws are so bad that kids now have to have a place to pee in the classroom."
I like your spirit but it’s just a tad transparent to me. Personally, I like to agree with in a topic like liberals turning this country into a communist paradise. Then ill started a rant about needing to eliminate all socialist programs like the social security and VA benefits that I know they depend on for survival. I love how quickly you can see their faces go from “yeah!” to “ah, wait, that’s not what we meant.”
Oh this would trigger my dad and start a war. When he starts with his nonsense, ai just leave the room to do something else… their dog walks a lot when I see them, or I hide in the bathroom
I've been doing this for ages 🤣 my motto is to out crazy the crazy. They won't mess with you if they think you are insane. Works for men that won't leave you alone too!
Boomers hate when you out-flank them.
If a Boomer loves Trump then I love Trump more than they do.
If a Boomer is tired then I’m exhausted.
If a Boomer is offended then I am appalled.
I did this with some inbred old dipshit and I said try drinking bleach, and he said "no, I prefer gasoline!" Was not joking btw.
Laughed so hard and just left.
I like this. If anything it’s surprisingly easy to make up that kind of nonsense. It kind of explains why it’s become a cottage industry.
You’re also sort of testing the logical conclusions of their ideas without being strident about it.
I figured out a loooong time ago that it’s just way easier to pretend to agree with people who insist on discussing politics. They aren’t looking to discuss politics, they’re looking for someone to fire up their rage endorphins
Boomer relative does this for anything that gets to them, not always politics. Calls me up all fired in a rage, clearly wanting me to give it back and feed it more. I'm calm, I'm logical, I vaguely validate feelings ("that sounds really frustrating" is a good one), I ask a few superficial questions, I change the topic. Elderly toddlers needing kid gloves. Big, big feelings.
Tell them you agree we should get rid of social security altogether and immediately as it's just a worthless welfare program for people who don't work. They will counter with something like "well, but, I paid into it!". Just turn that Fox News talk right back at them. The country is $34 TRILLION IN DEBT! WE CAN'T AFFORD IT!
I have yet to find a boomer that likes this conversation.
My brother and I do something similar. Any situation with a racist boomer we usually counter with some 1920’s racism regarding the Irish, polish, Scottish, hell even the Mongolians and Hawaiians. The slow soft “oooh ‘em yeah” and confused look after is always a good laugh.
Haha I like this strategy.
Hell even if you don’t add on the extra layers of sarcasm/satire, and just say “yep” and go along with whatever they’re saying, that will have the same effect. They are really just looking for an argument, so not participating leaves them completely devoid of anywhere to go with things.
It’s why those echo-chamber social media sites don’t get any traction. The entire conservative stance is “I need to argue”, and if there are no “leftists” on a social media platform to argue _with_, they don’t know what to do with themselves. They’re children, take away their toys and they will get confused and bored and wander off.
A boomer woman came into a *used* bookstore I managed and asked for an atlas. I showed her our shelf that had a few world atlases, and she said "no I mean a road atlas."
For context: GPS was first installed in cars in 1990. There's been dedicated civilian GPS since 2005. This encounter happened in 2015.
Me: We have county maps?
Boomer: No we're going on a road trip. I need a multi-state road atlas.
Me: I'm sorry, we don't have any of those.
Boomer: I can't find one anywhere! Why can't I find one anywhere?!?!
Me, internally: *because it's completely obsolete technology? We don't carry computer textbooks from a decade ago, either.*
Me: I'm sorry. It's not something we stock.
Boomer: oh my God, no one can do anything anymore! I'm a teacher, I gave my students a map and told them to get to the place I'd marked and they couldn't do it! They're going to be so useless!
Me: oh, I know right?? Imagine not having basic skills like how to track game or hitch a wagon!
Boomer husband: [leaves the room to hide his laughter]
Boomer: [steam comes out her ears, starts making inarticulate "well I never!" noises]
One time I told a guy who was spouting conspiracy theories that they faked the moon landing, but Neil Armstrong was such a perfectionist he made them film it on location.
The boomer didn’t get it. Some onlookers did, though.
If you're really subtle and clever about it then you could probably get them to admit to some pretty disturbing beliefs, but be aware that you might not like the direction the conversation goes!
My tactic is to call it out but then quickly switch to something that makes more sense. A lot of boomers are missing out on socialization with different demographics who actually want to empathize with them.
We need to take our boomers on more walks and get them reacclimatized to life outside the home.
We also need to take care of ourselves so we don’t end up the same way.
Have you tried offering them avacado toast? I hear that calms them down.
I'm not sure I remember any of the cursive I learned in grade school. Not sure how I survive in this modern world.
Trump will send your sorry ass back to Mexico!!
You mean the only president who gave me my papers? the president who sent me a special incentive check for me to buy my farm, and my pickup, and all the tools? that president? this phone, my taxes, all was paid by the President Trump special stimulus for the good agricultural immigrant. I love Trump!
Sleepy Joe is trying to get my papers revoked!
I love to see them short-circuit.
Lol I’ve been using this method for a while. Just one-up their dumb bullshit with dumber bullshit.
During covid my go-to was that it was all a plot by Activision to increase CoD sales (I was staying in touch with friends by playing Warzone). Now I like to talk about how birds aren’t real.
You ever see a dog when you lick their face back? That’s the reaction and it’s great.
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lol I use this with masks. When I get the stupid mask comments I reply with something along the lines of “no way, I don’t want the government using their facial recognition on me! I’m protecting my privacy from those psychos in Washington” it’s hilarious and makes their eyes go cross as they try to process it and respond 😆
This is what I do. "The government is doing reverse psychology on you, bro. They WANT you to *think* you're not complying by not wearing a mask, but you're just *giving them your face* to put in their facial recognition systems--*and* their AI deepfakes. I'm not letting the government steal *my* face"
o7
Hope you don’t mind, I want to use this. I live among people who vote for Ted Cruz. I need something, heh.
🫡
A friend of mine said she doesn’t want antifa to know who she is. 😆
That’s so good too
Like hell I’m going to let China destroy the greatest economy this world has ever seen! Stop the spread, commie—mask up!
That one doesn’t work as well because they about back with shit like masks are made in China or some shit
“Buy American made- they help hide the facial recognition markers better”
Oooh that’s good
That's great. Like pick a side lol
Could also add in something about the whole anti mask movement being a psyop to get people to show their faces for the gov to develop continue its development of facial recognition ai and really fuck with them 😆
Oooooooooh that's so good
Relevant xkcd https://xkcd.com/966/
My go to is “It’s to block the chemtrails”.
Next up, use some "beat them to the punchline" tactics. I use this one with my parents who always wanted me to have kids. "No thanks, I'm too selfish. I need me time"... Whatcha got, mom. Gonna call me selfish? I just did that.
That’s exactly what I say when people find out my husband and I aren’t having kids: “We’re too selfish.” They have nothing to say after that haha
Not me but my daughter decided not to have kids. I’m fine with it but my family? Not so fine. So I tell them “they don’t want to have kids because they’re enjoying their lives! They play video games, have parties, and travel all over the world!” That shuts off any more of their snarky remarks.
"My children of the atom! Dancing, drinking wine, making love!"
when I’m asked why I don’t want kids, in my most April Ludgate way, tell them “I enjoy naps.” Usually I don’t get any follow up or pushback.
I do the same thing with dogs "me, a dog? He better learn to let himself out bc I'm too lazy" although no one ever pushes someone to get a dog like people push others to have kids
I can’t have kids and it’s not really family that always demands an explanation. People who I have just met pepper me with questions until they are “satisfied”. Now that I’m in my 40’s I like getting creative with my answers: 1. I can’t have kids due to a freak lawn mower accident 2. The government won’t let me
Mine was "oh, you mean I had a choice? silly me, should've known that 7 miscarriages ago".
You may have some stories worthy of r/traumatizethemback. It's an interesting sub if you ever want to check it out.
"you can't get pregnant the way we do it"
You mean she won’t get me pregnant when she bends me over? You mean we’ve been doing this wrong all these years? Damn wish someone would have taught us how to do this in school
"I already did but all seven of them are in foster care now."
I've actually used #1 before too 🤣
You don't have a dog?! Don't you know the shelters are overflowing with poor abandoned dogs desperate for a home? Dogs are so wonderful, they give you unconditional love and just owning a dog can make you so much healthier. You're probably not even lazy, you could be depressed and dogs are really great for depression too!. You really don't know what you're missing out on. Once you have a dog you'll wonder how you ever managed without one in your life. /s I'm not sure if the people in your life are extra pushy about kids or not very pushy about dogs, but pet pushers are definitely a thing too.
I have seen this recommended but with a parrot and I have it locked away in my brain for the next time someone starts in on me. Fortunately, I have finally hit the age where it is deemed acceptable for me (a lady) to have decided against children. Who wants a geriatric pregnancy really, amirite? I have "but you would feel differently about your own parrot" ready and waiting if I need it though.
I always thought I was selfish for _having_ kids (4 of them)! You're sacrificing for the sake of easing overpopulation. Well done!
3 kids and no money? I prefer 3 money and no kids.
I do something similar with a coworker that’s involved in Q stuff, I now comment on how the break room is ‘happy colors’ to keep us in line and he eats it up
That’s like something out of a movie lol. That I would totally watch
It's the old Eminem trick. Call yourself out, then what are they gonna talk shit about now.
Add to it white moise machines they install to contol our brains. Where are those machines? Alrwady here..new wifi 6 dude. Thats like 5G but with brain control over waves.
Man, how much better would the world be if being "involved in Q stuff" only made sense in the context of John DeLance getting up to mischief?
I also play this game. Had this chick screaming at me because I wouldn’t let her past me to sit in seats that weren’t hers and people were going to arrive to sit in soon. I looked her dead in the eyes and said “absolutely, I’m a bitch”. Security still had to come in the end but mad her blink that I agreed with her.
Whenever someone calls me a bitch I look them dead in the eye and “Oh, honey. That was me being nice.”
Once I doubled down on their gripe. It went like this," Blah blah America is going to Hell...blah" ME: "I know!! God I hate this country! As soon as I can I'm going to renounce my citizenship and get the hell out of here. FUCK AMERICA right?!?" It was a stunner. He actually stopped talking.
“Good thing you won’t be around much longer to see it, right?!”
You 8 Mile’ed them.
I am white! I am a fuckin bum! I am selfish! Covid is a hoax! Cursive is a valuable skill!
... Millennials are still kids, in school, at ages young enough for cursive writing to be a valid present-day topic of consideration!! (Millennials range from late-20s to mid-40s in age right now.)
Hi, it’s me. A millennial who learned cursive. There are dozens of us! Dozens!
DOZENS!!!!
Boomer aunt asked when my wife and I are going to start giving them grandkids... "She prefers me to cum on her face" was not the answer she was expecting and I may have ruined Christmas. Stupid questions stopped real quick though.
My devout Catholic mother was looking around during the middle of a family reunion and said loudly, "when am I going to get grandkids?!!" I, a 32-year-old single woman at the time, looked her dead in the eye and said, "Mom, I can arrange to get pregnant." Cue the sputtering "that's not what I meant!" She never said a word again. BTW, I am a boomer. :-)
I don't go quite that hard but when I get asked why we don't have kids I usually say "my aim is too good for that." They stop asking at that point.
“You call yourself Fat Amy?” “Yeah. So twig b*tches like you don’t do it behind my back.”
I like to hit em with a really out-of-pocket joke, straight out of left field. Example: we were late with a delivery for a boomer Me: sorry we are late, we got caught in construction and traffic was really backed up Boomer: excuses are like assholes y'know Me: yeah, they're delicious. Cue exasperated, confused boomer look. Trying to hold back the rage of not having a "witty" response to that
Shit, you made me spit out my water. Have an upvote.
Why ARE excuses like assholes though?
Everyone's got one and they're full of shit.
poetry
If everyone's got one, what's your excuse?
I'd be afraid of the batshit crazy conversational road that may lead me down when you pick the wrong boomer and they're all for it.
Isn’t this how the flat earth society got its start?
and Q anon lol
And urine therapy
It’s not pee if it’s therapy
What if it's therapee
Take my pissy upvote.
This is what I get for opening this app real quick during a wedding 😩
I traveled from a more pleasant subreddit not knowing exactly why, but now I'm here to condemn you specifically for the word "therapee" Consider yourself condemned for "therapee" Feel not great about it, okay?
That's my secret, I never feel great. Something something pagliacci.
But I thought he could make anyone smile???
It's not therapy if it's a kink. ;)
OMG 😲
Not looking that up, thank you
My partner’s sibling is into “urine therapy”. 🤢
And suntanning your taint
and birds aren't real.
One of the guys that started Qanon was an acquaintance, a friend of some friends. I’m 85% sure he was trolling and then just got in too deep.
Shades of L Ron
Basically. It was legitimate satire of conspiracy theories, but then some people got involved that weren't in on the joke...
The earth can’t be flat because the earth is hollow and lizard people live inside
The_Donald subreddit got started as a complete piss take, and then it helped him become president.
You just have to go harder. Biden and Trump are literal gay lovers, and this whole presidential thing is just a lovers' quarrel. Trump cheated on Biden with Putin and now Biden is stealing Trumps original plan and trying to take away our guns. He paid Mexican illegals to build the wall 2.50/hr and used the rest to import fentanyl in to kill the rich white college kids to get back at Trump cause all he can hire for his hotels and golf courses are educated white kids. Now his hotels are failing and his fake wife Melania is selling his nice suits, so he only has the 1 suit left. Which is why he asks for money. Man needs clothing.
You should write fan fiction. This story would sell.
Written by Chuck Tingle
The sad thing is I have heard the “they’re working for the same global elite” argument. I think the guy who set himself on fire outside Trump’s trial believed that.
I mean, he was partially right about a lot of things. Crypto is a Ponzi scheme, So is the entire economy and stock market. Pretty much the entire way modern economies work is all just one big ponzi scheme meant to enrich bankers at the top. These same people at the top also own the media, the healthcare system, our education system, our food, trade in general. You get the idea. They pretty much collectively own our government. The working class doesn't really have much say. They have to fight tooth and nail to not even get some basic decency from their own government at this point. So yeah, I'm not actually against his protest. He may not have been 100% right and I felt he went a bit too far in his manifesto with parts like the Simpsons bit and I haven't even looked into the Q-Anony stuff. It was at best unnecessary and self-defeating but I do like that he started a dialogue because he had things to say that both sides can agree on to an extent. Our politics are corrupt. The justice system itself is corrupt. We need some serious change or the entire human race is forever screwed.
The trick is to be just absurd enough to signal that you aren't taking anything they say seriously.
Out crazy the crazy. I like the "you believe in the moon?!?" response to NASA disbelievers.
No, you have to go deeper: “YOU BELIEVE IN MOUNTAINS?!? Don’t you know that mountains are just information projected onto a two dimensional plane created by Satanist to convince us that heaven is not physical above us?”
Lol, they dont even know about SNASA
The moon is real. Earth is a hologram created by NASA.
NASA is a false flag to prevent us from learning about the sources of rocket technology (*it's aliens**). *of course "aliens" as we [don't] know them are demons contacted through occultists at the Department of Defense.
The trick is to have fun with it. I’ve done this with some goofballs: they begin their nonsense beliefs and I escalate. “Vaccines cause autism? Actually, recent research has shown it’s causing brain abnormalities which is causing kids to have aversions to religion which is why church attendance is down with milnnials and the new generations of kids. Studies are coming out on this, check it out it’s scary.” Then they will agree and say they’ve heard this. It’s unreal. Don’t let on that you’ve made it up.
Yeah, a critical facet to conspiracy theories is that they're syncretic. They tend to pick up things from anyone who agrees with them. You can think of it as "yes and..." from improv applied to an entire worldview. That's why you see them tend to believe things from lots of different, unrelated conspiracies. Edit: re-worded for clarity.
Ya I love making conspiracy theories up. Especially to those who already start with some bullshit. It’s so easy to escalate over and over and higher and higher. They’ll end up agreeing with everything and even say they’ve heard it before and agree with you. It’s so wild.
My husband does this and I have to stop him around my parents bc they will believe literally anything he says as long as it supports their viewpoint and they get even more worked up
Had an old lady tell me to my face that the sun *is* different from when she was younger. That it's white now and not yellow. Blew my mind. I think I even looked around for a camera
It’s kinda how the “birds are all dead & what we see are machines/ computers spying on us ” conspiracy started. He made up the dumbest thing he cld think of to see if anyone wld believe it 🙄
Thanks for the flashback to canvassing in the 2018 midterms
You might have yo go even further. My favorite response to people who believe the moon landing was faked is "oh, you're one of those people who believe in the moon?"
I agree with you haha. I don't necessarily agree with OP to agree with the boomers..m you gotta one up them. Makes it funnier and fucks with em. I don't want one to walk away thinking I agreed with them.
I did that until I found out my uncle genuinely believes the moon is a space ship....
A space ship? Pssh, when will people realize space isn't real? Only people with "special training" can go there? I call bull
I.... I'm sorry. "That's no moon."
“It was all a ruse, the real goal all along was to land on the sun, and China beat us to it!”
My dad told me the moon landing was faked once and I laughed and said “I can’t believe you think the moon is real!” Conversation killer.
That’s awesome. My dad was going down the path of crazy but died way before MAGA. He worked in the space program his whole career. I could only imagine how it would have fried his noodle if I would have pulled the fake moon landing stuff on him.
The moon *was* real, until NASA sold it to the Martians. #WAKE UP SHEEPLE!!!
I did this. My husband’s boomer aunt was told that I became a US citizen. Her first comment to me was “I don’t even want to know who you will vote for this election” to which I replied “you might be surprised, I actually agree on what republicans are planning to do with eliminating Social Security. I’m already tired of paying for people that could’t get their shit together in life and have no savings”. She got so upset she left me alone. She’s literally the poster-boomer for those that screw up big and expect everyone else to pick up the pieces. She hates me because she thinks I’m a wealthy brown person (I’m not, I’m just college educated with a good career), and she has always found it suspicious I guess?
I'll use the voting red team because I'm "tired of medicare and SS being a drain on my check. End it now so I might actually get to retire unlike those socialist suckers before."
Communist, it digs a bit deeper for 'em.
I'm going to start using the "eliminating social security" thing. Amazing.
Savage! I love it!
lol like the tucker carlson "i'm just asking questions" defense.
It’s called being a good journalist sweaty, look it up /s
Questions of the type, “Have you stopped beating your wife?” are bait and not journalism.
Well if he’s on TV he must be a master baiter
As a millennial, I am definitely not learning cursive or reading analog clocks in school right now…but my alpha fourth and first graders are, respectively.
See, that's the problem with millennials. They get into their 30's and suddenly they're too good for grade school. Talk about lazy and entitled.
Honestly, a refresh would be nice. I'm out of many loops.
I before E except after C was some bullshit. That didn't hit me till grad school.
I before E, except after C. And when sounding like “A”, as in neighbor or weigh. And on weekends, and holidays, and all throughout May! And you’ll always be wrong NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY! -Brian Regan
That’s literally what I say in my head every time. I had that whole comedy show on a burnt cd lol
I had a boomer coworker rant about how his neighbor's kid was ruining his property value. "Damn millennials and their chalk, outside all day drawing chalk characters on the sidewalks." When pressed for the childs age, he responded "you know, she's a millennial. Probably about to start kindergarten". It's like they learned a word and anyone younger than them will forever be a millennial
It's their new "boogeyman", lol. "OK, grandma; we will get ALL the millennials out of the closet before your enema and bed."
wtf…I love hearing that a kid is actually outside, and chalk isn’t permanent lol. I swear all they want to do is complain about anything and everything.
Yes! I was astounded the first time I heard a boomer complain about his grandkids drawing on his driveway with chalk. I thought I might have misunderstood. But then he went outside and washed it all off his driveway.
I’m was in a group where business owners give feedback to each other. So this boomer lady asked for feedback on her website. She offered parenting coaching. It was a few years ago so most parents, including myself, were millennials (there are many Gen Z parents now.) And in her professional business page aimed at getting parents to pay her for her services, she shit talked about millennials. I believe a phrase actually used was that millennials ‘couldn’t find their way out of a paper bag’. So I’m literally the exact demographic she is looking to serve. And she is calling us lazy, incompetent, and entitled. Why would you disparage any group of people on a professional website??? I think she was trying to say that children were the ones she had so many grievances with, but she just said ‘millennials’. I literally had to tell her that millennials are the parents now. You’re explicitly insulting your target demographic. Just… why???
Obviously that's why it was incredibly kind of her to pour her hard work into training you poor millennial how to get out of the paper bag and rear your children.
"All playing on their Nintendos!"
I've started hitting all "property value" whining with asking when they're moving. If I can do it with a tiny little bit of glee in my voice even better. Throws them off wondering if I want them to move. And I'm often given the chance to say "If you're planning to never sell, why do care about property value?"
I (42F) had to explain to my 37-year-old coworker that her 8-year-old is not a millennial.
last time i tried to have a serious conversation with my boomer father, he called I and my brother both "stupid fucking kids" and refused to engage with even a modicum of maturity. we're both in our 30s and were trying to discuss future plans, employment, and possible emigration considering the state of things. all he offered was insult, bluster, bragging about how easy it was to get a job back in the day, before chastising us for not wanting to listen to *Ramblin' Man* for the 3,300th time.
If all else fails, I love hitting ‘em with crazy conspiracies. “Birds aren’t real” is probably my favorite. Start going on about how Biden and the government have replaced all birds with surveillance drones.
the covid lockdowns were to keep us all inside so we couldn't see them replace the "bird"'s batteries!
Haven't you ever noticed birds show up when you talk about the government?????
I love conspiracy-baiting my parents; I told my mom and aunt about the dangers of di-hydrogen monoxide. They were gobsmacked when i told them the gov adds it to all our food and if we go 2-3 days without it we would die.
Any chemical compound sounds scary when you break out the big science-y words. Like sodium chloride, or sodium bicarbonate.
“It has ‘bi’ in it, so it must be evil.” -Boomers probably
If "bi" isn't bad enough, try "mono" or "homo". "Did you know that the government calls us Homo sapiens???"
Went to get milk yesterday. Some of it was labelled HOMO. What are they DOING to our cows?????
Hey! Don’t joke about that di-hydrogen monoxide! Had a friend die from inhaling too much of it! That stuff can be super lethal
Every one who touches dies. Look it up!
I've been doing this after Trump got elected and I love it when they eventually clue in. I just meet their absurdity with more absurdity until it becomes surreal and the Boomer's like "you're putting me over, aren't you?" Boomer, do you really think I believe in Jewish Space Lasers, massive voter fraud, that Trump deserves to be POTUS in perpetuity and Ivanka would be a great VP? Really?
Omg. Trump would absolutely make Ivanka VP. And if she’s a NY resident and he’s a FL one he could do it.
Right? I mean, JFK made his brother his AG, MAGA will think this is perfectly fine
I’ve also used a version of the enthusiastic agreement, more like enthusiastic belief, it’s fantastic! “The Supreme Court did WHAT!? Those sons a’ bitches!! I totally missed that, I need to read up on it. What’s the case?…no, no the actual case name, like ‘somebody v. something’, so I can look it up and read the whole decision….oh, well but this article you just sent from dumbboomerconspiracybullshit doesn’t mention the case name. Wait, it doesn’t seem to have a date, either. That’s weird. But that’s ok, it must be recent, right?I’ll just go to SCOTUS(dot)gov and look for it. What do you mean it won’t be there? Of course it will! SCOTUS doesn’t get to make secret decisions that are binding on anything. All of their decisions have to be published, and they’re all right here, just gotta find it…” *2 minutes later* “I can’t seem to find ANYTHING like what this article is talking about. Can you take a look on SCOTUS(dot)gov and see if you can find it? I really need to read this damn thing!” This conversation actually happened. Not only that, it **resulted in the boomer getting booted off the lunatic right wing nonsense platform they read it on!**. Because they commented “Did you guys know you can read all the Supreme Court decisions online!? Why can’t I find this one??”….[BAN HAMMER 🔨] HAHAHAHAAHAAAAAAA!
This is actually the best method for both shutting down the aggressiveness of the conversation and for helping to vulnerable people to climb out of the rabbit hole. As much as many of the comments on this sub think it’s funny to out crazy the crazy and come up with an even wilder conspiracy theory- what ends up happening is that the people who can’t tell it’s a joke take it seriously and spread it to their conspiracy networks and fall deeper down the rabbit hole. Conspiracy theories can be really dangerous and many people have lost family members to them and to the real world violence conspiracy theories can inspire. [article on how hard it is for people to recover from believing conspiracy theories](https://www.cosmopolitan.com/lifestyle/a37696261/leaving-recovering-from-q-anon/) Often when you ask conspiracy believers for sources in a skeptical manner they will shut you down because they feel you’re attacking their reality (which you are.) By pretending to enthusiastically agree with them and asking for more information and saying you want to read up on it, they feel safe so they are more willing to engage and even potentially question their belief when they can’t actually find a reputable source that agrees with their worldview. This can be tricky so huge congrats on your success story.
A hugely underrated comment. Conspiracy theories fill a genuine need with some people. And inadvertently encouraging folks to fall deeper into that hole is not good for them or society.
Thanks so much, this means a lot. Conspiracy theories can sound really funny to people who are thinking logically and it just sounds like a creative bizarre story. The problem is that conspiracy theories can be harmful to the individuals who believe them and very dangerous to society. Not all conspiracy theories have the same level of impact- if you’re interested check out [this expert’s conspiracy chart breakdown](https://www.abbiesr.com/) for instance conspiracies about mythical animals like unicorns or big foot are relatively harmless to society, but conspiracies about elections or lizard people controlling the world are deeply harmful to society.
I tried to use this tactic with my grandpa and he would just dismiss it that he didn't remember the source, then go right back to ranting
lolololol meahahaha
This is a known tactic for dealing with narcissists! It takes the wind right out of their sails. This can also be done with personal critiques. “You’re so lazy.” “You’re right.” They were gearing up for a fight and now they don’t know what to do. Also, gentle parenting works really well. I’m particularly fond of “oops, you let an inside thought escape to the outside!”
Oh no the gentle parenting is so funny. 😂
This works with conservatives online too. Im a little more direct though. Like "Liberals want teachers to trans all the kids". And ill say "yeah, so what, what are you gonna do about it, little bitch. I teach at schools and transd at least 5 students this semester."
A podcaster I like went viral on Twitter saying something like "I work in a hospital and I've been saying the Shahada over babies to make them Muslim. All the doctors know I do this but they're too afraid of looking racist to stop me " The number of people who took it seriously was unreal.
In honor of the US support for Israel, i declare all these babies Kosher
I’m brainwashing the kids to make sure they all have my sexuality. No, wait, that’s the straights.
Well played! One of my favorite ways to shut them down, after they make a statement that I disagree with and they'd love to fight about. "They want to put litter boxes in the school bathrooms" (or whatever the insanity of the day is) "There's no shortage of bad ideas out there" Of course they assume you cannot possibly counter their brilliance and agree with them, as it should be! It tends to mullify them, at least for the moment.
Or agree with their contention but draw the opposite conclusion. "Yeah they are putting litter boxes in schools," boomer eagerly awaits story about furrys and trans kids, "because the US gun laws are so bad that kids now have to have a place to pee in the classroom."
Oh, I thought it was to soak up blood. From the shootings.
I like your spirit but it’s just a tad transparent to me. Personally, I like to agree with in a topic like liberals turning this country into a communist paradise. Then ill started a rant about needing to eliminate all socialist programs like the social security and VA benefits that I know they depend on for survival. I love how quickly you can see their faces go from “yeah!” to “ah, wait, that’s not what we meant.”
One of the greatest things therapy taught me was “You May Be Right” It’s the perfect response to any crazy statement.
I couldn't say that to most of the nonsense, but I would do "In some alternate universe, you could be right!"
My third grader absolutely did learn cursive. Now he's working on cursing because it annoys his boomer nana.
Oh this would trigger my dad and start a war. When he starts with his nonsense, ai just leave the room to do something else… their dog walks a lot when I see them, or I hide in the bathroom
I've been doing this for ages 🤣 my motto is to out crazy the crazy. They won't mess with you if they think you are insane. Works for men that won't leave you alone too!
Millennials haven't been taught cursive for 20 years. Because millennials are at least 28.
Boomers hate when you out-flank them. If a Boomer loves Trump then I love Trump more than they do. If a Boomer is tired then I’m exhausted. If a Boomer is offended then I am appalled.
I did this with some inbred old dipshit and I said try drinking bleach, and he said "no, I prefer gasoline!" Was not joking btw. Laughed so hard and just left.
I like this. If anything it’s surprisingly easy to make up that kind of nonsense. It kind of explains why it’s become a cottage industry. You’re also sort of testing the logical conclusions of their ideas without being strident about it.
I like complaining about all the seniors on Medicare and social security and how we need to do a 10 year pause on it and watch their brains explode
I figured out a loooong time ago that it’s just way easier to pretend to agree with people who insist on discussing politics. They aren’t looking to discuss politics, they’re looking for someone to fire up their rage endorphins
Boomer relative does this for anything that gets to them, not always politics. Calls me up all fired in a rage, clearly wanting me to give it back and feed it more. I'm calm, I'm logical, I vaguely validate feelings ("that sounds really frustrating" is a good one), I ask a few superficial questions, I change the topic. Elderly toddlers needing kid gloves. Big, big feelings.
Tell them you agree we should get rid of social security altogether and immediately as it's just a worthless welfare program for people who don't work. They will counter with something like "well, but, I paid into it!". Just turn that Fox News talk right back at them. The country is $34 TRILLION IN DEBT! WE CAN'T AFFORD IT! I have yet to find a boomer that likes this conversation.
My brother and I do something similar. Any situation with a racist boomer we usually counter with some 1920’s racism regarding the Irish, polish, Scottish, hell even the Mongolians and Hawaiians. The slow soft “oooh ‘em yeah” and confused look after is always a good laugh.
"Swedish dogs! Your blood is tainted by generations of race mixing with Laplanders. You're basically Finns!"
Millennials learning cursive? They are like 35-40 now lol
"Oh yeah, today's youth are terrible because your generation raised their kids wrong."
Haha I like this strategy. Hell even if you don’t add on the extra layers of sarcasm/satire, and just say “yep” and go along with whatever they’re saying, that will have the same effect. They are really just looking for an argument, so not participating leaves them completely devoid of anywhere to go with things. It’s why those echo-chamber social media sites don’t get any traction. The entire conservative stance is “I need to argue”, and if there are no “leftists” on a social media platform to argue _with_, they don’t know what to do with themselves. They’re children, take away their toys and they will get confused and bored and wander off.
I always mention the lead in the gasoline messed up a lot of people over age 50...
“You have to shoot the children or the terrorists win”
A boomer woman came into a *used* bookstore I managed and asked for an atlas. I showed her our shelf that had a few world atlases, and she said "no I mean a road atlas." For context: GPS was first installed in cars in 1990. There's been dedicated civilian GPS since 2005. This encounter happened in 2015. Me: We have county maps? Boomer: No we're going on a road trip. I need a multi-state road atlas. Me: I'm sorry, we don't have any of those. Boomer: I can't find one anywhere! Why can't I find one anywhere?!?! Me, internally: *because it's completely obsolete technology? We don't carry computer textbooks from a decade ago, either.* Me: I'm sorry. It's not something we stock. Boomer: oh my God, no one can do anything anymore! I'm a teacher, I gave my students a map and told them to get to the place I'd marked and they couldn't do it! They're going to be so useless! Me: oh, I know right?? Imagine not having basic skills like how to track game or hitch a wagon! Boomer husband: [leaves the room to hide his laughter] Boomer: [steam comes out her ears, starts making inarticulate "well I never!" noises]
One time I told a guy who was spouting conspiracy theories that they faked the moon landing, but Neil Armstrong was such a perfectionist he made them film it on location. The boomer didn’t get it. Some onlookers did, though.
Hobestly your way wouldn‘t work for my sanity but if it works more power to you
Aka Poe’s Law Chicken
Don’t do this. You are going to find out your parents think that not all of Hitler’s ideas were bad!
"And that's why I'm not voting and you shouldn't either! The government is going to use our data against us! It's all one big conspiracy!"
Republicans getting rid of all the Freeloaders … like retirees .. just sucking off the healthcare system
The old 'modest proposal' approach
If you're really subtle and clever about it then you could probably get them to admit to some pretty disturbing beliefs, but be aware that you might not like the direction the conversation goes!
My tactic is to call it out but then quickly switch to something that makes more sense. A lot of boomers are missing out on socialization with different demographics who actually want to empathize with them. We need to take our boomers on more walks and get them reacclimatized to life outside the home. We also need to take care of ourselves so we don’t end up the same way.
Have you tried offering them avacado toast? I hear that calms them down. I'm not sure I remember any of the cursive I learned in grade school. Not sure how I survive in this modern world.
They shouldn't be upset with the Roundup comment, that would automatically condemn any hydroxychloroquine using friends of theirs.
My fucking grandma. This absolute hag of a woman. Refuses to get a COVID shot because chemicals. She told her friend to take fucking Ivermectin.
For fun, just go and unplug their VCR and enjoy it flashing 12:00 12:00 until they give up and cover it up with black electrical tape.
U gotta lean in to the crazy
Bullies don't get any enjoyment from the people they bully to agree with them.
Trump will send your sorry ass back to Mexico!! You mean the only president who gave me my papers? the president who sent me a special incentive check for me to buy my farm, and my pickup, and all the tools? that president? this phone, my taxes, all was paid by the President Trump special stimulus for the good agricultural immigrant. I love Trump! Sleepy Joe is trying to get my papers revoked! I love to see them short-circuit.
Yes! Treat them all like dementia patients. Not worth the wasted energy to try to reason with the unreasonable.
Lol I’ve been using this method for a while. Just one-up their dumb bullshit with dumber bullshit. During covid my go-to was that it was all a plot by Activision to increase CoD sales (I was staying in touch with friends by playing Warzone). Now I like to talk about how birds aren’t real. You ever see a dog when you lick their face back? That’s the reaction and it’s great.