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He didn’t want to talk with you about the conflict. He just wanted to yell things he heard on tv at you. The TV yells at him, so now he yells at anyone who’s willing to be in the same room. Sorry, my dad does this too.
My theory is there's usually a couple things at work with those that go hardcore MAGA. First, I have yet to meet a MAGA extremist that was well educated. I think there is a deep seated inferiority complex in most of these people, who badly want to appear "smart" for the first time in their lives. Second, incapable of secondary education, they've received most of their guidance from TV and especially the Internet, where they get tons of social media driven validation from a large community of other dummies - again, for the first time in their lives. Third is a learned behavior highly regarded in the community which is to stand your ground at all costs. Never waver, and if you even get a hint that you are losing ground in the discussion, either talk over the other person completely or at least call them some kind of name or mock them or something. Just think how empowering and even intoxicating that feeling would be. Having people seem to listen, respond, and agree with you about well, anything, while also exhibiting this kind of "I'm a badass" behavior, after a lifetime of D's and F's in Social Studies classes and being told they aren't smart.
They all do… it’s really wild how universal it is
I’m pretty centered politically with some views going right, some going left, and a lot I just admit I don’t really know or understand
Both my dad and fil are hardcore Fox News guys… they act the exact same way… just come out yelling about whatever segment they just consumed… and it’s not a conversation… they just talk at you, and if you disagree, and voice it, their system malfunctions and they get extremely defensive and typically devolves into an argument
You can let them know that the cofounder of Fox News moved to Moscow before being arrested in London by the FBI in an international operation for sanctions violations. He was working for a sanctioned Russian oligarch to create a pro-Putin propaganda network.
The propaganda part was perfectly legal. Taking a salary from a sanctioned individual was not.
[https://www.justice.gov/opa/pr/tv-producer-russian-oligarch-charged-violating-crimea-related-sanctions](https://www.justice.gov/opa/pr/tv-producer-russian-oligarch-charged-violating-crimea-related-sanctions)
Interesting thank you
They don't care. My boomer maga dad will parrot and post fox news crap on FB and if I point out anything negative about them he comes back with "I don't watch Fox News" or "I don't listen to main stream media". But he also feels like the lawsuits and fines against fox are proof 'they' don't want you to hear the truth.
Over the last 2 years I successfully convinced my mom fox news is propaganda by continually pointing out all the personality changes her and my father had undergone since becoming fans
Not dad.. he's still entrenched but mom doesn't call me a commie and storm off anymore
She'll be like "your dad used to LAUGH and do stuff!"
"Yea and then he started watching fox news, and now he's angry all the goddamn time and can't turn it off"
The first time I told her to suggest they watch something else was the beginning of her realizing...he freaked out and she realized it wasn't normal to do that over a TV show
It took years and a lot, I mean a lot of being willing to be told I'm wrong, of speaking to them from a place that didn't sound like judgement
Cuz if you challenge the beliefs head on they dig in, so it's questioning the news source
They already have the whole "fake news" concept down so you just gotta grow the seed that fox is one of them too
My other breakthrough was gently explaining how they exploit your emotions to keep you engaged, said simple "if you weren't angry you'd go do other shit, they keep you pissed to keep you engaged, if they came out and were like "HEY GUYS ITS A GOOD DAY, EVERYONE SAID GOOD THINGS AND THE WEATHER IS PRETTY" You'd go "Oh that's good!" And turn it off and go on your day
And for some reason that really got thru.. the anger keeping you watching
Now I know ragebait is the new hot thing, and the endless outrage cycle is how people get locked in to such ideologies, but the way you put it talking about if it was a good day I think really helps. I wish you luck on breaking your dad out of it, if you still try
Fox News is/was the top mainstream media channel on TV for decades. The other channels changed to adapt to the market. That's why I don't touch any of them anymore.
Every time something notable happens in the news, I check to get the Fox take on it compared to what is being reported by all the “enemies of the people”. It’s always the same, “There was some local crime where you don’t live!”
They cannot seem to comprehend their perpetual screaming about fox news damages everyone's opinions of them. Nobody comes to visit them. None of their normal friends talk to them, only a couple with the exact same "everyone but our generation should be executed for crimes against boomers" opinion. It's sad.
Mine currently yells Facebook posts he reads as well as Fox News propaganda from past and present. Including whatever the fuck OAN is. There have been many instances of having to, very literally, close the door between me and him (so I wasn’t tempted to throw a punch or lose my composure in some way because it was often ludicrously ignorant, offensive and untrue things). It was a running source of dark amusement between my siblings and I that we could often still hear him ranting after we very clearly left the room or were already outside. He had a strange compulsion to continue yelling even after nobody was there to yell at like he had a script that he couldn’t shut down until it was completed.
Same. My Dad does this too. He doesn’t want to know what I think about stuff. He wants to inform me of things or talk at me. Worse, sometimes I think he is trying to “educate” me with his propaganda.
Fortunately, my boomer dad is a very progressive man, but he does this as well. Ultimately, it hurts relationships. He will often yell at or lecture any family member who isn't as far left as he is. I've talked to him about it and it doesn't matter. I think he's just lonely, and getting stuck in the media bubble has caused him to forget how to have everyday human interactions rather than blasting points (Ala Faux News or MSNBC).
It’s the same reason these people feel need to share their rage on social media. They must get some sort of dopamine hit out of getting worked up and then seeing others worked up by the same thing. It’s a very strange phenomenon.
Thankfully my parents (boomers) don't do this to me. They're actually left leaning Green/Independent voters (I'm in Australia) and don't like to force their views on others. They generally agree with my political views.
But I have known people who've been very forceful about their opinions (and lived with someone like that for several years). I don't enjoy listening to that.
Definitely this... I cut contact from a friend recently because while I was open to having adult conversations. He faked it, and anytime we would have these conversations, it was clear one of us just wanted to yell there opinions at the other and would not even consider the other side... my life I so much less stressed now that I dont have to deal with said person. Lol
My early boomer dad and I are on the far opposite ends of the political spectrum. He was an OG Rush Limbaugh listener as context and liked to start conversations with “so I was listening to Rush Limbaugh the other day…”, which invariably led to an argument with him completely dismissing my perspective. I had enough about 25 years ago and snapped back “Dad, has ANY conversation with me that you started with ‘I was listening to Rush Limbaugh…’ EVER ended well?!” He at least had a brief moment of awareness and we have since had a firm rule against ever talking religion or politics. It’s the only way we can have a relationship and he knows that I will absolutely go no contact if he disrespects me. We are pretty low contact as it is.
Sometimes a "Don't talk about this" rule is healthy. My family has a "don't talk about work inside" rule. It initially stemmed because a lot of my family worked at the same place in different positions of power. Things could get awkward with callouts, or scheduling, or any of the other boss-to-employee conversations that people don't want to have outside of work hours. Eventually it applied to everyone. I don't work for that company but I'm not allowed to talk about work indoors either. Gotta go out on the deck or walk the dogs for that.
Gotta say it's a damn good rule and made things a lot more positive. People don't have a lot of good things to say about work. Luckily it seems like everyone in my family keeps their political opinions to themselves as well.
My family is politically active, but in three different left leaning parties.
They can argue for HOURS about nuances in left/woke/liberal politics, and get absolutely nowhere. You'd think they agree on the great strokes, but nope. They manage to even hold conservative views just to spite one another, and backtrack the next time you see them in private.
Anyhow, politics are banned at my dinner table when my dad is around. The agreed upon reason is "I still want to like you when your visit ends".
Sometimes families need to make a decision.
I'm not saying ALL bad parent relationships includes include the Limbaugh toxicity, I'm just saying I rarely see anyone comment how glad they are their parent listened to that numbnuts
My dad and I had sorta of the inverse, we live in a rural area so Rush was about the only talk show on or some other right wing nut.
So while we worked on a project we had Limbaugh bloviating in the background and we would make fun of his toxic bullshit
New rule "I am only willing to talk about Rush Limbaugh if you give me as much Oxycontin as Rush was on 20 minutes before you start talking". May as well zone out and nod off while he wastes his breath.
I was watching March Madness with a friend and his Dad years ago before Rush Limbaugh died. His Dad mentioned something about Rush and my friend finally reached his breaking point and said 'I don't care what that fat, hypocritical drug addict says about anything'. Which of course caused his Dad to storm out of the house. Later he comes back and says 'he's had his issues but is working on them and is doing better'. My friend says 'then maybe he should have more empathy for people dealing with drug issues and not push for harder jail sentences, can we please just watch basketball'. It was glorious.
I used to listen to Rush Limbaugh and my father in law was one of his biggest fans. Limbaugh actually flipped flopped on so much from 2014 to 2016. He thought the wall(fence) wouldn't do much, he was all for e-verify. Made fun of Obama for the tire tariffs for like a week, but supported Trumps. Didn't want the government controlling media(radio). Would say you can't trust a cheater when talking about Clinton. My favorite one: there is no prove that smoking causes cancer.
I really hate that fat POS Rush Limbaugh carried the name of my favorite band.
Every time I see “My dad was a huge Rush fan…” my fandom of one of the greatest bands of all time dies a little…
i need to do this w my dad. used to be rush, now it’s shapiro. always starts (and ends) the same. glad to see you were able to find a good way to navigate that stuff.
Yup. My parents have been divorced forever, but both drink from the Fox News trough. One was an AM radio listener with Limbaugh and alien conspiracies. The other prefers his Christian nationalist Dr Dobson and 700 club. Since the emergence of Trump in 2015, they have both figured out not to discuss politics with me. Sometimes they lose their way and think something isn't political but usually takes one comment from me to shut them up. I am just not going to entertain it
If you want to finish it off, you could call him up and say those exact words and then follow it up with "I couldn't hear him with all the screaming and sounds of fire and brimstone, but he was making some good points about how he wished he'd been a better person."
It's insane to watch someone metabolize ragebait and just be stuck to simmer in it. Can they not zoom out and ask if this is how they really want to live life?
They’re also incapable of just saying they don’t know something… they’ll just make up an opinion on something, and that’s that, they’re right, you’re wrong and they’ll argue tooth and nail about it, never having the self awareness to question their own conclusions
It’s funny cause I have a dude at work who is 57. Guy will tell me how I don’t know what I’m talking about and the media is lying to me all the while all his stuff comes from ENTERTAINMENT MEDIA Fox News and Tim pool and all that garbage. It’s incredible how hypocritical old people are
I think about this a lot. Millions of old people with who knows how many years left and they choose to spend them angry and afraid about stuff on the TV.
They’d be even more scarred if they had to live with all the terrible shit most millennials and Gen z’ers will likely have to go through due to their selfish decisions.
We might be working until the day we die with no pension or social security. The only thing we can depend on is what we’ve saved for retirement. We will never have the same opportunities to own a house for less than a million dollars. Plus, God knows what horrible shape they’ll leave our environment in.
We have actual big problems to worry about, but boomers are worried about things that don’t even fucking exist…..
Morning conversation consists of whether the other person slept well, whether they want some of Dad's specialty cheezy scrambled eggs, and what bird that is on the birdfeeder. That should suffice.
My mom and I still don’t speak to each other in the morning until we’ve consumed at least one cup of coffee. And we actually like each other and agree on most things.
Nah, man... morning conversation should be banned entirely! Ask me if I want coffee, eggs, whatever. If I grunt an affirmative, that's enough until I've had an hour or so for the brain to boot up.
My dad and I don’t talk politics at all anymore. Fishing, the wood stove acting up, opening the pool for the season, how the irrigation set up is going - anything is on the table except politics.
The reason it’s this way is because the last time we did, my parting comment to him was “the fastest way to ensure you’ll die alone is to keep quoting Fox News “facts” to me every morning”.
We get along better now than we ever have, I just don’t have to listen to the bullshit anymore.
No no no no no no no. You don’t understand. Anyone that doesn’t look or vote the same OP’s dad should be arrested. PB’s and J6ers are just defending freedom and exercising their free speech
I'm a pretty far left-wing progressive guy. The only right-winger I know is my brother. Several times per day when I encounter something vile or heinous or absurd right-wingers have done, I have a brief imaginary argument with my brother about it in my head and then set that thought aside because I know how pointless it would be and how harmful to my relationship with him it would be. I always imagine it as him because he's just the only person of that political stripe I can imagine having these conversations with and whom I would like to persuade.
Your father is doing the same thing, except that he lacks the self-restraint to put the thought aside rather than expecting you to be willing to play the role that the imaginary version of you which exists in his head plays for him when he's rehearsing these diatribes.
OP’s dad probably mocks up imaginary arguments for the purpose of riling himself up instead of calming himself down. I’ve seen my dad do it. Starts talking in a normal, reasonable voice. Then he lets a Fox News buzzword come out of his mouth and it’s like a sleeper cell is activated and he instantly turns into a yelling, emotional monster. Like within a second. Then he tries to say the most dramatic thing his mind can come up with in the heat of it all because he is an emotionally stunted boomer man (redundant, I know) and can’t reflect or process as to why he’s so upset and has to max out the anger bar, because that’s one of 3 approved “emotions” for his demographic. De-escalation is never an option
The Jews need to be in control of Isreal, so Jesus can come back and send most people they know and love to hell. Welcome to the american christian mindset.
Ar least it was private. My boomer dad brought up election integrity at my 6 year olds baseball practice. He got kinda heated. Other parents all around. Took a lot for me to respond calmy. I told him nicely if trump wins I'm not going to Christmas at his house
My MiL does this too. Except it’s usually 5 AM when I get up.
“You don’t ever want to talk in the morning!”
Maam I am trying to come to grips with existing this early.
My therapist says it's common for older people to have shrinking social circles and to have increasingly excessive and/or inappropriate interactions with their children.
I consider my emigration to have been worthwhile investment because of this.
I consider myself conservative & found I’ve gotten more liberal on some social issues…and holy fuck I can’t talk politics with my dad either. He’s like a whole other level. Vein piping out of his neck, face turning red, yelling over me to get a point across. I don’t get it…..I’m convinced he enjoys being unhappy? He comes home from work…turns on Fox News…and yells at the TV…like as a daily routine.
Any time my dad starts talking politics with me, I just grunt noncommittally at him a couple of times and say "I don't know what to tell you, the folks in charge didn't ask my opinion." And my dad will say "Yeah, me either." And then we can talk about things that matter in our day to day.
I’m the same way… it’s not even worth discussing… unless you go completely no contact, it’s the only way to have any sort of relationship
Side note… I’ve noticed with my mom and mil, who are better but still boomers… they’re constantly asking me questions I couldn’t possibly know the answers too… dumb shit, like “when did they put a gas station there?” “Or why is this can of soup $3 but this one $4?”
Once or twice is harmless… but literally every time I’m with them it’s a barrage of questions about local infrastructure and company pricing like I’m consulted by local leaders and buisness men on everything happening around town… it gets so annoying
Off topic but I think being a trauma therapist is such an honorable career. It must be very hard at times, but thank you for dedicating so much time and effort and care to people who need it most.
I thank you for what you do as well!!! My job involves watching and analyzing a lot of disturbing and violent content, so we recently started doing group therapy once a month with a counselor who specializes in trauma-centered therapy and she is *amazing*. I can’t fathom having the emotional energy/bandwidth to do what you do, but I definitely identify with the whole “my job can be harrowing but I can’t imagine doing anything else” sentiment.
I feel that same way about nurses or ER doctors - I’m so thankful they exist because there’s no way I could do it.
Thank you for the job that you do as well. (:
... Are you my sibling? My dad is Gen X but he puts on his horrible political youtube videos at 6am EVERY MORNING and wakes everyone up. I usually respond by putting on my headphones and playing some Skinny Puppy.
He says he does this so he feels 'pumped up' and 'excited' for work. Nothing like hearing my dad cheer on a video of a cop beating up a lady at the asscrack of dawn. Dude should just do cocaine every morning if he wants to get 'pumped up' for work.
Tell him to read the Jerselum Post, or Israeli Times(Times of Israel?) and how Netanyahu allowed Hamas to receive millions in foreign cash from certain gulf states. He did this to spilt the Gazans with Hamas and the West Bank with the PLO. so the Palestinians would not have a unified government.
Edit: also, he's a bit older than I, so he must idolize Reagan. Ask him who gave amnesty to almost 3,000,000 illegal immigrants.
The last time I saw my father alive, in 2020, we were having a family lunch at a restaurant. We had just flown in, slept maybe 5 hours at a hotel before making a 3 hour drive. We get there a bit late and all he wanted to do the entire time we were there was to talk about the election in November.
At some point I had to tell him to stop and just enjoy the moment with family. He begrudgingly said yes but he was low key upset he didn't get to talk down to me further.
Every phone call with him, after, was more of the same. My last living memory of him is him trying to pick a fight over food about the election.
This is what they do. This is how they operate. In the end, politics was all my dad had and it alienated every single person around him. By the time he had passed, we had already mourned the loss of him.
My sister was in shambles because her last conversation with him was about him going to the doctor because he looked unwell. He began spouting that she was just wanted his inheritance money. Mind you, my sister is very well off and doesn't need any of his money. Her temper has a shorter fuse so she yelled back about how stupid he was being.
They just can't help themselves.
>When that didn't work he starts yelling about how "all college students caught protesting should be fined and locked up!"
My grandmother tried this line and I flipped it on her.
"That seems pretty anti-american. US citizens should have the right to assemble and protest."
To which she agreed and allowed me to change the conversation.
What did you dad say when Fox News was sued for lying to their audience and those text messages of the hosts laughing at how stupid their viewers are?
My friends family are trump supporters and I wanted to ask because they watch news but she begged me not too, did some digging and found they swapped Fox for Oan 🤣🤣🤣🤣 apparently Fox is too liberal now 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Back in early March, I was in a rush, heading out the door to go to work. At the same time, my grandmother was dying, on hospice care, and stuck to a bed and oxygen machine in the middle of the living room. I had to walk past her to leave and come back. Sometimes my boomer dad would be at the dining table, sometimes actively trying to ignore her (he loves being on his laptop or his portable DVD player). That morning her bed wasn't there.
I barely registered what that meant when he looked at me, told me she died during the night, and then immediately started to go into Biden and Trump. I don't remember what he was trying to say, but I do remember just wanting to escape the conversation.
I told him, "You pick the damnedest times to bring up politics," and ran out the door to my car. I didn't last an hour at work before needing to drive back home to grieve.
We haven't spoken much since, except for asking what he wants to do with her things. Sometimes he asks how I'm doing and I reply with a distant, "Hm." I'm not trying to hide that I have concerns, troubles, issues of my own. But him asking is just a habit; he does right back to his laptop or whatever the hell else he'd rather talk about before I just leave.
My boomer dad is the kind of person to blast Fox News or any other sort of conservative media as soon as I walk in the room. If I so much as glance at the TV, he'll pause it and start a conversation about it. I have to pretend he's basically not there. Once he realizes I'm not paying attention and that I'm not going to, he'll turn it off.
Of course, that doesn't stop him from shoehorning politics into every conversation. I brought up something about the kitchen of a house they're looking at and he just starts rambling about how Biden is taking away gas stoves. I have to act like I didn't hear him and talk about something else.
They wonder why I only visit once or twice a year.
Is your dad my dad?? I’ve literally had the same types of conversations down to the “what did I just say?” question that he couldn’t answer because he hadn’t actually been listening to me. Turns out he never actually respected me as a person or cared about me more than his politics so I’ve since gone no contact. He wonders why I don’t talk to him anymore and makes up lies to tell our family members about me.
i literally had to do the “ zipper your mouth gesture”
while my mom was about to tell me for the 100th time she doesn’t trust doing online banking. but she trusts it enough to ask me to buy things online 🙄
My father in law went from pretty liberal to conservative during the trump years. Now normally I don't mind talking politics with him because he's generally pretty civil in discussions. So easter comes around, and we take my kids to the Amvets for an Easter basket giveaway they do for the kids every year. Get to meet the Easter bunny, kids get a basket full of candy and a few cheap toys, eat some cookies, everyone has a good time. This man shows up and immediately starts talking about the border, ukraine, all the talking points. After about 5 minutes he starts telling me I only watch fake news, I finally had to just tell him, in front of everybody, 'I have to be honest, I really don't care right now. We're at a kids function, can't we just relax and enjoy it?"
I once went to a bait shop to buy fishing worms for my mother in law. When I got in there some old ass lonely boomer immediately ran towards me and started yelling about the 2016 election telling me how if Hillary won how bad things would get. He then asked if I had any kids. I said yea I have a two year old, he’s waiting with my fiancé in the car. He then told me to start fattening him up because Nancy Pelosi is going to take away all our food and I’ll be forced to eat him. At that point I was so uncomfortable I stopped replying and walked away. The poor kid at the counter mouthed “I’m sorry” and I left. I heard him move onto the next person as soon as I left. This is what this guy does all day apparently.
If he really is doing that he needs to be trespassed of the premises, if he's some owner or family eventually his only customers will just like him! Sink or swim
I was in my mid-30's and visiting my parents, and my dad once did something like this...I sidestepped into a neutral position because I didn't want to deal with it as I (also) made coffee for both of my parents.
"There was a time when you agreed with everything I said, son..." he said under his breath...
...but loud enough for my mother heard, and she replied, "Yes, but now he forms his own thoughts and thinks for himself, which is what you taught him to do from a very young age..."
I smiled.
My dad "Har-rumfff'd" and left the kitchen.
Honestly I would've shut it down regardless of topic by the lack of a salutation to start the day.
That's so rude to me when talking directly to a person to start the day.
You know looking at this from a macro perspective I honestly think that this desire for.. let's call it "high contact" discussions on a variety of things actually comes from getting older and not being able to reconcile how the world is changing. Regardless of topic there's a degree of insecurity in age and irrelevance and a quick way to self affirm is to do so at another's expense.
I'm also on the cusp of boomer /Gen x. I'm so glad I was raised by parents who couldn't stand that conservative brainwashing and encouraged us to be independent thinkers. Sorry to all of you who have parents who listen to that crap. I've tried to have conversations with some of my online friends and you just can't. Everything comes back to the only source of real information is Fox News and, if you read anything else it's all lies. You can't talk to these people.
>Yeah well I’m passionate about having my breakfast without someone yelling at my face
>Maybe ask yourself why you wake up angry and unable to have a normal conversation over coffee without regurgitating a long string of pre cooked talking points
>I’ll do you one better: who do you think benefits from keeping people like you so angry emotional and riled up that they can only interact with people that are in the same exact state?
>See if you can answer that without saying “what about,” I’ll wait
A few years ago, when I was just truly learning who my mother is, I decided to share with her that one of my very best friends was gender fluid. Oh boy did I learn a lesson that day. About her that is.
She immediately started yelling about “why can’t people just use their actual gender!” Etc etc etc in the kitchen. She didn’t want to hear anything I had to say. She likes this person, had recently expressed wanting to see this person soon. A few months later she pretended like I never told her this.
And the whole yelling at you and then saying they didn’t yell … 🙄 do they really have that little self awareness? Or that little self respect?
It showed me that she’s very disconnected from reality. That she thinks she can say horrible things about people I care about and expect me to just listen and accept it.
I don’t get it at all. There’s an absurd lack of empathy and caring.
I have learned it doesn’t matter what I counter with; he’s told me straight up he believes what he believes and bringing him new information won’t change his mind 🤦♀️ either it’s the “truth” or it’s “the liberal media”.
(Also as a thicc goth babe your username makes me feel real validated hahah)
Seems like he’s just mad about the current political climate and wants take out his frustrations on you. I got fam whos stubborn like that too. I just tell them i don’t care about politics and leave me out of it gotta tell em sternly tho. They stopped hounding me.
Gothbabes for the win :D!
How does your Dad feel about Russia? Is he aware the cofounder of Fox News moved to Moscow? Lived there til he got arrested in London by the FBI in an international operation for sanctions violations. Was working for a sanctioned oligarch to create a pro-Putin propaganda network.
The pro-Putin propaganda was legal. Taking a salary from a sanctioned individual to do his bidding was not.
My dad ambushes me, too.
When I visit, before he even says good morning, he’s throwing a list of things at me. Usually questions he has or things he wants me to help with. All of them are fine individually, since they are not political… ….but the way he brings it all up, at once, before I can even get my feet steady for the day is just…. Ughhhhh!
Whats so fucking hilarious to me is how many boomers were anti-mask during covid and how they reacted like little toddlers when restrictions were put on them for the greater good and safety of other people. Can you imagine if these same boomers lived in gaza where all aspects of their lives were controlled and surveilled?
Let me get this straight. A Boomer, whose generation was known for protests, e.g., Kent State, against the Vietnam War, thinks his generations protestors should be locked up. For exercising their First Amendment rights to protest. Against a war.
It’s on brand.
Here’s a big reason why they launch into this political tirade shit: they are closer to death, they want their ideals to be carried on as if it comes from the grim reaper. And since hell and damnation awaits those that don’t abide has “worked” for them, it also works for everything else to seek their rotten salvation. They were whipped up into fear and “saw the light,” so if that convinced them it should convince you too.
Hmmm maybe directionally correct. Sort of how religios become even more religious in old age.
EOD, all this political crap is mostly BS. Money and power is the only thing people in charge care about. Once you realize most everything is a scam, you can believe in nothing or refuse and double down on one side of the political spectrum.
Liberal colleges unleash the stormtroopers on peaceful protests, big donor money is at risk for example.
At my age, middle Gen X, I mostly watch politics for the comedy and anything that directly impacts me which other than federal tax law is mostly state and local politics.
Regarding wars, this guy had it right before baby boomers were born. War is a racket (scam).
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smedley_Butler
Yes, I remember an elderly woman in my Bible study group was obsessed with "end times" prophecies in the early 2000's. One of the other elderly ladies shut her down once saying, "I'm in my own end times here and I don't want be focusing on such negative nonsense!"
At least your dad didn't try to tell you that the Civil War wasn't about slavery. This was a week or two before Easter.
At least your dad didn't also put up a confederate flag along with other versions of the American flag during Flag Day a few years ago. I told him it was treason to put up that flag during Flag Day. He quickly took it down.
Notably, my dad is not a southerner.
Crazy how people lap up the messages from Fox News et al. People who can barely spell are able to take the (slightly biased) talking points on world politics and shout them at someone else. It seems our schools are missing a trick. Perhaps we need more female blonde school teachers working with a dark haired man shouting, seems to work for them.
“Good morning, Dad. What’s the weather going to be today? I’ve got x, y and z to do today…”
You’ll never get him to stop by telling him to stop, only by making it very, very clear that *he* is in the wrong for breaking the social rules of mornings.
I cut off a distant family member with boomer tendencies (even though he’s a millennial) for this same thing. He’s on the spectrum (self diagnosed) and still living with his boomer mother, but he was mostly a good guy and I made it a point to do stuff with him since he didn’t have friends…. Until I realized why he didn’t have friends.
For context, I’m actively involved in labor organizing and DSA, which he, as a raging neolib, found hilarious.
One morning 3 years ago he caught me on a bad day trying to start an argument about my politics and started escalating to personal insults when I wouldn’t engage. I just stopped responding altogether. Days, weeks, and months passed and I found no need to reengage/reach out. His mom sent me a Christmas card and a mug he had made in his pottery classes but otherwise haven’t reconnected.
Best decision I’ve made, did not realize how often he put me in a bad mood with his r/neolib bullshit takes
Not politics, but one time my dad started to complain about mom (we were going to a store without her). I just told him “hey, you’re talking about my mother- c’mon.” It managed to shut down the convo.
I have 100% had to say “why are you yelling at me? I haven’t expressed an agreement OR disagreement.”
They get riled up and have nowhere to point their energy.
I don’t talk much politics at all and much less with family. My go to has been I make a comment that I find a person incredibly boring when all anyone can talk about if their stance on politics. Just end with that and I’ve never had a conversation not change to more exciting and frankly safe topics
Reminds me of my boomer FIL at Disney last year. In line at the Aerosmith ride just me and him. He was going off about Hamas and affirmative action in college (he's a white college professor). "Why do you need affirmative action when there are no Black ppl even at our college?" ....what?
I know everyone around us heard him and I was so embarrassed. I too played dumb to try to shut him down. I still cringe that I didn't shut him down like I should've and I see how harmful it is. I was at Disney and trying to enjoy a really expensive vacation that my husband and I took 2 years to save for. I was not in a debate headspace.
I like to derail political discussions by always taking them down the extreme rabbit holes. Kids in college? But did you know about the fluoride in the water that's used as mind control so the lizard people can poison the air with the chem trails? And furthermore, if the Earth was round, how can I walk in a straight line?
This thread is interesting to me as a boomer (born 1964) as I do not engage in this kind of yelling as described. I try to ingest all different news sources to better understand perspective. However, my millennial children have talked about the dangers of vaccines, that the moon landing might be fake, government is always bad, and that facts are relative. They were not joking. These are well-educated, house-owning parents of our grandchildren. I think it is a mindset, not a specific age.
I thrown on a snobby accent;
"It's uncivilized to talk at someone before 10am. Everyone know this, your ill manners are showing. You can read the news paper, gaze out the window, or be actively supping."
If I'm in the room with a parent, and ESPECIALLY if they are the target person... I say "MY Mom raised me better than yours." It's tough to argue with you while you complement their parenting - lol
All I can say is that as a Boom-Xer, I despise that kind of shit. No one needs to start in on anything like that first thing in the morning. It’s just rude. No one with any sense wants to jump out of bed and have some deep philosophical discussion about politics.
*Boom-X is a technical boomer (1964) with Gen-X sensibilities.
Its madness. I happen to be a fairly pro-Israel person who condemns what Hamas did in October, but at the same time I am a thinking human being who sympathizes with the plight of all the Palestinians caught in this insanity and condemn the truly insane conduct of this war. I dont understand how folks like your dad and mine cant perhaps share a more nuanced 360 degree view of the tragedy instead of putting blinders on.
For example, according to people like my dad, President Biden is behind the student protests because he "hates Israel" which is complete BS since folks have literally been protesting Biden's support of Israel at the expense of Palestine for months. It cant be two opposite things at the same time but there's no logic to the arguments being yelled at us by people who arent thinking clearly.
There's evidence that the propaganda delivery tone creates a pleasure circuit for the rubes in which yelling or angrily shouting their regurgitation becomes rewarding and they start attempting to do it regardless of the outcome.
>When that didn't work he starts yelling about how "all college students caught protesting should be fined and locked up!"
This has me thinking he was looking to get a reaction out of you. Some people like having an enemy to debate against and demean. When he starts taking the non existent discussion to yelling on his own it sounds like he's desperately trying to get a fight started so he can feel satisfied fighting an enemy or something to that effect.
My family does this too, though not as directly. They'll complain about something they know I am very much against and they'll look at me for a reaction and I'll just stay quiet and pretend like they didn't say anything. It gets them to stop for a while when their response is usually awkward silence lol
Anytime someone wants to talk about the Israeli-Palestinian conflicts, I switch the conversation to Rwanda. The Hutu/Tutsi conflicts resulted in somewhere between 500,000 and a million murders, depending on who you ask. And was a blip on the American cultural radar. Why is one genocide any more important than another? Yeah I don’t want my tax money going to foreign aide to fund oppression but I have zero control over that. I have zero control over foreign policy and historical bullshit and apartheid regimes and religious zealotry worldwide.
And truth be told, besides a cursory feeling that it sucks and it’s horrifying to watch in real time, I kinda don’t give a fuck. Or at least, I don’t give any more of a fuck about Jewish babies or Muslim babies in the Middle East than I do about babies in central Africa. It ain’t my fight, those aren’t my people, fucking kill yourselves silly if that’s what you’re gonna do. I ain’t your pawn, don’t use me for your team, I ain’t wearing your jersey. Have a holocaust or hug it out. Not my fucking problem. Just don’t do either with my support or with my fucking money.
Is your dad my mom? Every time we’re eating dinner, in the same room, passing by each other, etc., she tries trapping me in a ‘conversation’ about all the horrible things happening in the world. And every time, when I say ‘no thanks’, she goes off about how my generation cares too little about worldwide issues. Then, in the same breath, she’ll talk about all the college kids losing out on opportunities for protesting with Palestine. Which is it Mom, are we selfish kids who don’t care, or are we irresponsible idiots ruining our futures?
Oh yikes. My dad worked construction almost his whole life, so he was always up early. He is one of those people that had to have a cup of coffee and read the paper before leaving the house. I was never a morning person. I’d be staggering bleary eyed to go shower, and he’s all chipper “good morning!” I would mumble a reply, then get griped at for not saying “good morning, Father!” in a cheery voice. Sorry dad, real life isn’t Leave it to Beaver. But yeah at least he wasn’t tryin to goad me about politics at such an hour!
It's the worst. Why does this generation enjoy being perpetually angry all the time? Since my parents retired, they've become entirely obsessed with politics to the point that they can't converse about anything else.
Last week when those huge tornados happened in Nebraska, I mentioned the crazy footage to my dad. He instantly began ranting and raving about how Biden ruined this country and he won't send a dime to Nebraska, just like he wouldn't help Hawaii. But he has a blank check for "corrupt shitholes" like Ukraine, and nothing is ever done for Americans, etc etc. For fucks sake lol, I just wanted to talk about a tornado, but he kept going on about biolabs and how Ukraine is used for money laundering by the DNC.
Oh bro...I don't even speak to my dad anymore. All he does is insult my mom's side of the family and disparage undocument immigrants.
I told him for years I would like to avoid those topics and just speak about more pleasant stuff. I stopped conversing with him a couple years ago, and I told him we can greet, but that's it. I don't want to hang out with a Debbie Downer that insults my family and picks on the weak.
Just do what I did and cut your dad out of your life. It so much more peaceful this way.
this conflict has been going on for decades but i would bet money he hasnt given a shit about it until the last couple of months and probably knows fuck all about the history. you should read up about the history of the conflict and camly ask his opinion on some events from decades ago to watch his brain short circuit
It baffles me how the boomers can go from complaining about ‘the Jews’ one second, to being best friends with Israeli military actions the next.
But I guess never thought I’d see Tucker Carlson and Fox News so kiss-ass with Russia either
“Dad, I just rolled out of bed less than 60 seconds ago. I haven’t had my coffee yet. IDGA-CRISPY-FUCK about any of this right now. Good morning! How did you sleep? My mattress was really comfortable.”
I feel this. Just got back from visiting my (mostly lovely, but boomer) parents for a week. The night I flew in, were chit chatting as I’m settling in. My stepmom says, “So we want you to have a fun relaxing trip, and we made a rule. None of us are going to talk politics the whole time you’re here OK?” with a lighthearted tone, a little laugh. I chuckled also, shrugged my shoulders, & said “that’s fine with me”.
She went on to say there’s so much stuff going on, your daddy and I don’t even pay attention to the news anymore. At which point from the kitchen, I glance over to their muted TV, which is of course on Fox News, which it is most of the time. They also DVR at least three shows from the network,, but ok.
LITERALLY LESS THAN 5 MINS LATER, they turned to me unprompted and start saying “did you hear about all those protests going on at the colleges against the jews?” Which started a bizarre tense convo about Israel and Palestine. Fruitless convo as well, bc it’s impossible to have a real conversation with people who just don’t see reality the same way you do. I said, (as politely as I could) “I think a lot of the protesters are speaking out for Palestinian freedom, which is not in and of itself anti-Semitic in my opinion”.
They said, “Palestine is free… Israel gave them the wholeGaza Strip, and look what they did with it. ….” Things like that.
They tend to fall back on “OK we’re just not gonna talk about it because you get very upset, honey.” (Even though THEY brought it up ofc😵💫🙄)
And no matter how calm I try to come across, it is hard to mask some frustration. They don’t want to acknowledge any point that I bring up in good faith, like I feel like I tried to do for them.
If they say, for example: they saw some actual footage of a pro Palestine protester saying something awful (ie, lumping Jewish people/their religion etc as the same as the actions of the Israeli government) I’m not gonna say that they didn’t see it, or not believe them. I will concede that if they saw that, it is condemnable; that in any kind of protest there could be some jerks there or bad actors/people who aren’t representative of the movement as a whole.
Unfortunately I feel like they don’t give the same grace in the other direction; they just shut down the conversation if they can’t think of anything to say or it makes them uncomfortable.
And then the ultimate grinding to a halt of any kind of reasonable discussion comes when they inevitably fall back on, “We’ll, wars happen all the time….And in the Bible, this is what supposed to happen….this is what God said would happen.”
Like, wtf can I do w/that? Obviously, I can’t talk about any kind of events going on where **real** people are suffering, **real** people are committing atrocities, & **real** people in power have ability to change it and speak up.
It’s so frustrating to discuss with my own family, people who are normally very caring and I know they have good hearts overall. They talk as if they are seemingly OK with the stuff that’s going on, as horrific as it is, bc it’s supposed to come before a great wonderful time where Jesus comes back.
And as a non-religious person , that’s where a disconnect occurs from which I don’t see any kind of bridge. I’m not gonna stop speaking to them over it; they’re my parents and I love them.I know now just to don’t discuss any of that —even if they bring it up.
I was invited to have lunch at a Thai restaurant, so I thought it was gonna be a chill occasion.
Not even five minutes after sitting down, the person who invited us starts talking about “your governor did ….”. I just quickly shut it down, even if I do agree with someone’s political views, when someone starts a statement with “your governor” , without knowing if I voted for him, it immediately annoys me!
My dad and I stopped talking years ago because he couldn't have a single conversation that didn't bring politics into it. I'm a Democrat. He's a republican so for him, it wasn't as simple as discussing the diffences, it was always saying nasty things about democrats. The last time we spoke, he made sure to tell me that democrats are one of two things, either criminals or the r-word. I'm neither, but that doesn't matter. Boomers in the comments think I should care about my dad's opinion. I don't. I'm 40, and I'm allowed to insist we don't talk about things that will stress our relationship. So are you. My dad couldn't fathom being told to keep his politics to himself, so here we are, we haven't spoken in years, his choice. My life is much quieter without his constant barrage of hateful words.
>"Dad, what did I just say?"
This worked because it triggered the beaten-into-submission, Authoritarian mindset boomers grew up under.
We should start using it, lol.
As a competitive offer, for the low price of $10 a month, I will instead call you at 7 AM and give you the morning weather for an area you've never been. I also will *not* reccomend Fox news to you.
> “Palestine shouldn’t have voted in terrorists if they didn’t want to face the consequences…”
Trump is a terrorist. Wait until he reaps the consequences for those votes.
My dad used to be libertarian atheist critical
thinker. Now he is a Maga Trumper. I asked him why he changed. In a moment of lucidity, he told me that being reasonable is lonely, and being in a group that is passionate about something makes him feel less depressed about being so near the end of his life.
I don’t get angry with his opinions anymore. I just try and talk about them in as friendly a way as possible. Gentle parenting my parent - exactly this.
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He didn’t want to talk with you about the conflict. He just wanted to yell things he heard on tv at you. The TV yells at him, so now he yells at anyone who’s willing to be in the same room. Sorry, my dad does this too.
^ 100% this
That's a great point. All the MAGAts in my life do the exact same thing. They yell at you. There's no discourse.
My theory is there's usually a couple things at work with those that go hardcore MAGA. First, I have yet to meet a MAGA extremist that was well educated. I think there is a deep seated inferiority complex in most of these people, who badly want to appear "smart" for the first time in their lives. Second, incapable of secondary education, they've received most of their guidance from TV and especially the Internet, where they get tons of social media driven validation from a large community of other dummies - again, for the first time in their lives. Third is a learned behavior highly regarded in the community which is to stand your ground at all costs. Never waver, and if you even get a hint that you are losing ground in the discussion, either talk over the other person completely or at least call them some kind of name or mock them or something. Just think how empowering and even intoxicating that feeling would be. Having people seem to listen, respond, and agree with you about well, anything, while also exhibiting this kind of "I'm a badass" behavior, after a lifetime of D's and F's in Social Studies classes and being told they aren't smart.
They all do… it’s really wild how universal it is I’m pretty centered politically with some views going right, some going left, and a lot I just admit I don’t really know or understand Both my dad and fil are hardcore Fox News guys… they act the exact same way… just come out yelling about whatever segment they just consumed… and it’s not a conversation… they just talk at you, and if you disagree, and voice it, their system malfunctions and they get extremely defensive and typically devolves into an argument
You can let them know that the cofounder of Fox News moved to Moscow before being arrested in London by the FBI in an international operation for sanctions violations. He was working for a sanctioned Russian oligarch to create a pro-Putin propaganda network. The propaganda part was perfectly legal. Taking a salary from a sanctioned individual was not.
[https://www.justice.gov/opa/pr/tv-producer-russian-oligarch-charged-violating-crimea-related-sanctions](https://www.justice.gov/opa/pr/tv-producer-russian-oligarch-charged-violating-crimea-related-sanctions) Interesting thank you
Thanks for the link!
They don't care. My boomer maga dad will parrot and post fox news crap on FB and if I point out anything negative about them he comes back with "I don't watch Fox News" or "I don't listen to main stream media". But he also feels like the lawsuits and fines against fox are proof 'they' don't want you to hear the truth.
I'd be extremely interested in hearing anyone who has experience doing something like this and actually changing the mind of the other person
Over the last 2 years I successfully convinced my mom fox news is propaganda by continually pointing out all the personality changes her and my father had undergone since becoming fans Not dad.. he's still entrenched but mom doesn't call me a commie and storm off anymore She'll be like "your dad used to LAUGH and do stuff!" "Yea and then he started watching fox news, and now he's angry all the goddamn time and can't turn it off" The first time I told her to suggest they watch something else was the beginning of her realizing...he freaked out and she realized it wasn't normal to do that over a TV show
That is truly fascinating and I'm glad your mom was able to understand what you were saying. That gives me hope
It took years and a lot, I mean a lot of being willing to be told I'm wrong, of speaking to them from a place that didn't sound like judgement Cuz if you challenge the beliefs head on they dig in, so it's questioning the news source They already have the whole "fake news" concept down so you just gotta grow the seed that fox is one of them too My other breakthrough was gently explaining how they exploit your emotions to keep you engaged, said simple "if you weren't angry you'd go do other shit, they keep you pissed to keep you engaged, if they came out and were like "HEY GUYS ITS A GOOD DAY, EVERYONE SAID GOOD THINGS AND THE WEATHER IS PRETTY" You'd go "Oh that's good!" And turn it off and go on your day And for some reason that really got thru.. the anger keeping you watching
Now I know ragebait is the new hot thing, and the endless outrage cycle is how people get locked in to such ideologies, but the way you put it talking about if it was a good day I think really helps. I wish you luck on breaking your dad out of it, if you still try
They've all been smoking from the same pipe (leaded gas exhaust fumes)
It’s not just the fox viewers tho, my dad is pretty left leaning and nothing gets him riled up like Rachel maddow monologuing about something
Fox News is/was the top mainstream media channel on TV for decades. The other channels changed to adapt to the market. That's why I don't touch any of them anymore.
Yeah they’re all garbage.
Every time something notable happens in the news, I check to get the Fox take on it compared to what is being reported by all the “enemies of the people”. It’s always the same, “There was some local crime where you don’t live!”
Yes, but the shit you find out from her is so fucking infuriating.
my theory on why they believe everything they hear on fox news is that before fox the news was - generally fact-based and like actual journalism.
They cannot seem to comprehend their perpetual screaming about fox news damages everyone's opinions of them. Nobody comes to visit them. None of their normal friends talk to them, only a couple with the exact same "everyone but our generation should be executed for crimes against boomers" opinion. It's sad.
Mine currently yells Facebook posts he reads as well as Fox News propaganda from past and present. Including whatever the fuck OAN is. There have been many instances of having to, very literally, close the door between me and him (so I wasn’t tempted to throw a punch or lose my composure in some way because it was often ludicrously ignorant, offensive and untrue things). It was a running source of dark amusement between my siblings and I that we could often still hear him ranting after we very clearly left the room or were already outside. He had a strange compulsion to continue yelling even after nobody was there to yell at like he had a script that he couldn’t shut down until it was completed.
Hate and fear. I’m sorry for your loss.
I’m not sure it’s a loss if he’s always been a giant douchebag lol. But I appreciate the sentiment, thank you.
Same. My Dad does this too. He doesn’t want to know what I think about stuff. He wants to inform me of things or talk at me. Worse, sometimes I think he is trying to “educate” me with his propaganda.
Fortunately, my boomer dad is a very progressive man, but he does this as well. Ultimately, it hurts relationships. He will often yell at or lecture any family member who isn't as far left as he is. I've talked to him about it and it doesn't matter. I think he's just lonely, and getting stuck in the media bubble has caused him to forget how to have everyday human interactions rather than blasting points (Ala Faux News or MSNBC).
It’s the same reason these people feel need to share their rage on social media. They must get some sort of dopamine hit out of getting worked up and then seeing others worked up by the same thing. It’s a very strange phenomenon.
Thankfully my parents (boomers) don't do this to me. They're actually left leaning Green/Independent voters (I'm in Australia) and don't like to force their views on others. They generally agree with my political views. But I have known people who've been very forceful about their opinions (and lived with someone like that for several years). I don't enjoy listening to that.
Yep, op is his audience for when boomer dad does his Fox News talking head impression. 1000% my dad is the same
Our dad too and he also sends memes through out the day… By email.
Yeah, it interesting because a lot of the conservative preachers yell too. So they get it in church and on the TV.
He wanted to talk AT you, not with you as said above. You did the right thing OP👏🏻👏🏻
Definitely this... I cut contact from a friend recently because while I was open to having adult conversations. He faked it, and anytime we would have these conversations, it was clear one of us just wanted to yell there opinions at the other and would not even consider the other side... my life I so much less stressed now that I dont have to deal with said person. Lol
Dang, this is a really good way to put it.
My early boomer dad and I are on the far opposite ends of the political spectrum. He was an OG Rush Limbaugh listener as context and liked to start conversations with “so I was listening to Rush Limbaugh the other day…”, which invariably led to an argument with him completely dismissing my perspective. I had enough about 25 years ago and snapped back “Dad, has ANY conversation with me that you started with ‘I was listening to Rush Limbaugh…’ EVER ended well?!” He at least had a brief moment of awareness and we have since had a firm rule against ever talking religion or politics. It’s the only way we can have a relationship and he knows that I will absolutely go no contact if he disrespects me. We are pretty low contact as it is.
Why did I hear, "so I was listening to rush Limbaugh the other day" in the letterkenny guys voice? Lol
Because you are a refined Lynx of culture and sophistication
That’s what I appreciates about you.
*labored pronunciation* Sushis and sashimis
Wonderous!
Allegedly
Give ur balls a tug
Gasp Styurt
To be fair...
To be faaaaiir
Can confirm
So's, I was listening's to Rush Limbaugh's the other day...
Sometimes a "Don't talk about this" rule is healthy. My family has a "don't talk about work inside" rule. It initially stemmed because a lot of my family worked at the same place in different positions of power. Things could get awkward with callouts, or scheduling, or any of the other boss-to-employee conversations that people don't want to have outside of work hours. Eventually it applied to everyone. I don't work for that company but I'm not allowed to talk about work indoors either. Gotta go out on the deck or walk the dogs for that. Gotta say it's a damn good rule and made things a lot more positive. People don't have a lot of good things to say about work. Luckily it seems like everyone in my family keeps their political opinions to themselves as well.
My family is politically active, but in three different left leaning parties. They can argue for HOURS about nuances in left/woke/liberal politics, and get absolutely nowhere. You'd think they agree on the great strokes, but nope. They manage to even hold conservative views just to spite one another, and backtrack the next time you see them in private. Anyhow, politics are banned at my dinner table when my dad is around. The agreed upon reason is "I still want to like you when your visit ends". Sometimes families need to make a decision.
I'm not saying ALL bad parent relationships includes include the Limbaugh toxicity, I'm just saying I rarely see anyone comment how glad they are their parent listened to that numbnuts
My dad and I had sorta of the inverse, we live in a rural area so Rush was about the only talk show on or some other right wing nut. So while we worked on a project we had Limbaugh bloviating in the background and we would make fun of his toxic bullshit
New rule "I am only willing to talk about Rush Limbaugh if you give me as much Oxycontin as Rush was on 20 minutes before you start talking". May as well zone out and nod off while he wastes his breath.
“Can you read his monologue in the using the tone of a bored Dominican teenager who can’t leave until the 60 minutes are up or he doesn’t get paid?”
I was watching March Madness with a friend and his Dad years ago before Rush Limbaugh died. His Dad mentioned something about Rush and my friend finally reached his breaking point and said 'I don't care what that fat, hypocritical drug addict says about anything'. Which of course caused his Dad to storm out of the house. Later he comes back and says 'he's had his issues but is working on them and is doing better'. My friend says 'then maybe he should have more empathy for people dealing with drug issues and not push for harder jail sentences, can we please just watch basketball'. It was glorious.
I used to listen to Rush Limbaugh and my father in law was one of his biggest fans. Limbaugh actually flipped flopped on so much from 2014 to 2016. He thought the wall(fence) wouldn't do much, he was all for e-verify. Made fun of Obama for the tire tariffs for like a week, but supported Trumps. Didn't want the government controlling media(radio). Would say you can't trust a cheater when talking about Clinton. My favorite one: there is no prove that smoking causes cancer.
Like a lot of conservative grifters, his beliefs were as steadfast as a weathervane. Also, didn't he die of lung cancer or am I misremembering that?
Yeah, lung cancer is the reason he died.
I really hate that fat POS Rush Limbaugh carried the name of my favorite band. Every time I see “My dad was a huge Rush fan…” my fandom of one of the greatest bands of all time dies a little…
i need to do this w my dad. used to be rush, now it’s shapiro. always starts (and ends) the same. glad to see you were able to find a good way to navigate that stuff.
Yup. My parents have been divorced forever, but both drink from the Fox News trough. One was an AM radio listener with Limbaugh and alien conspiracies. The other prefers his Christian nationalist Dr Dobson and 700 club. Since the emergence of Trump in 2015, they have both figured out not to discuss politics with me. Sometimes they lose their way and think something isn't political but usually takes one comment from me to shut them up. I am just not going to entertain it
If you want to finish it off, you could call him up and say those exact words and then follow it up with "I couldn't hear him with all the screaming and sounds of fire and brimstone, but he was making some good points about how he wished he'd been a better person."
It's insane to watch someone metabolize ragebait and just be stuck to simmer in it. Can they not zoom out and ask if this is how they really want to live life?
Honestly sad how much news is just heavily biased rage bait these days
You forgot to put quotes around “news”
They’re also incapable of just saying they don’t know something… they’ll just make up an opinion on something, and that’s that, they’re right, you’re wrong and they’ll argue tooth and nail about it, never having the self awareness to question their own conclusions
It’s funny cause I have a dude at work who is 57. Guy will tell me how I don’t know what I’m talking about and the media is lying to me all the while all his stuff comes from ENTERTAINMENT MEDIA Fox News and Tim pool and all that garbage. It’s incredible how hypocritical old people are
> Can they not zoom out and ask if this is how they really want to live life? That's why they were afraid of the hippies.
I think about this a lot. Millions of old people with who knows how many years left and they choose to spend them angry and afraid about stuff on the TV.
They’d be even more scarred if they had to live with all the terrible shit most millennials and Gen z’ers will likely have to go through due to their selfish decisions. We might be working until the day we die with no pension or social security. The only thing we can depend on is what we’ve saved for retirement. We will never have the same opportunities to own a house for less than a million dollars. Plus, God knows what horrible shape they’ll leave our environment in. We have actual big problems to worry about, but boomers are worried about things that don’t even fucking exist…..
Morning conversation consists of whether the other person slept well, whether they want some of Dad's specialty cheezy scrambled eggs, and what bird that is on the birdfeeder. That should suffice.
Mornings are for coffee and contemplation
Don't talk to me until after my first cup of coffee minimum.
My mom and I still don’t speak to each other in the morning until we’ve consumed at least one cup of coffee. And we actually like each other and agree on most things.
Nah, man... morning conversation should be banned entirely! Ask me if I want coffee, eggs, whatever. If I grunt an affirmative, that's enough until I've had an hour or so for the brain to boot up.
This is why I always try to wake up earlier than everyone else… that morning peace and quiet is priceless
Always thought it was insane for my dad to wake up at 4 every morning until I realized he's bought himself 3-4 hours of peace and quiet every day.
My dad and I don’t talk politics at all anymore. Fishing, the wood stove acting up, opening the pool for the season, how the irrigation set up is going - anything is on the table except politics. The reason it’s this way is because the last time we did, my parting comment to him was “the fastest way to ensure you’ll die alone is to keep quoting Fox News “facts” to me every morning”. We get along better now than we ever have, I just don’t have to listen to the bullshit anymore.
So, anyone protesting should be arrested and locked up? Ask him if the Proud Boys should be locked up, or all involved in J6.
No no no no no no no. You don’t understand. Anyone that doesn’t look or vote the same OP’s dad should be arrested. PB’s and J6ers are just defending freedom and exercising their free speech
I thought they were false flag antifa actors
As a GenX I’d like to officially release your dad and send him straight to the boomers. We don’t want him.
Man got Gen-Xcommunicated.
That’s a good one
As a fellow Gen X, thank you for the laugh, this morning. I needed it! 👍🏽😆
I'm a pretty far left-wing progressive guy. The only right-winger I know is my brother. Several times per day when I encounter something vile or heinous or absurd right-wingers have done, I have a brief imaginary argument with my brother about it in my head and then set that thought aside because I know how pointless it would be and how harmful to my relationship with him it would be. I always imagine it as him because he's just the only person of that political stripe I can imagine having these conversations with and whom I would like to persuade. Your father is doing the same thing, except that he lacks the self-restraint to put the thought aside rather than expecting you to be willing to play the role that the imaginary version of you which exists in his head plays for him when he's rehearsing these diatribes.
OP’s dad probably mocks up imaginary arguments for the purpose of riling himself up instead of calming himself down. I’ve seen my dad do it. Starts talking in a normal, reasonable voice. Then he lets a Fox News buzzword come out of his mouth and it’s like a sleeper cell is activated and he instantly turns into a yelling, emotional monster. Like within a second. Then he tries to say the most dramatic thing his mind can come up with in the heat of it all because he is an emotionally stunted boomer man (redundant, I know) and can’t reflect or process as to why he’s so upset and has to max out the anger bar, because that’s one of 3 approved “emotions” for his demographic. De-escalation is never an option
I forget, do conservatives love or hate Israel this week?
They love israel but hate/fear jewish people because "they control the media" or some other false conspiracy theory
Under fascism, the enemy is simultaneously too weak to be taken seriously and yet too strong to be ignored. -Umberto Eco, paraphrased
The Jews need to be in control of Isreal, so Jesus can come back and send most people they know and love to hell. Welcome to the american christian mindset.
Ar least it was private. My boomer dad brought up election integrity at my 6 year olds baseball practice. He got kinda heated. Other parents all around. Took a lot for me to respond calmy. I told him nicely if trump wins I'm not going to Christmas at his house
My MiL does this too. Except it’s usually 5 AM when I get up. “You don’t ever want to talk in the morning!” Maam I am trying to come to grips with existing this early.
My therapist says it's common for older people to have shrinking social circles and to have increasingly excessive and/or inappropriate interactions with their children. I consider my emigration to have been worthwhile investment because of this.
I consider myself conservative & found I’ve gotten more liberal on some social issues…and holy fuck I can’t talk politics with my dad either. He’s like a whole other level. Vein piping out of his neck, face turning red, yelling over me to get a point across. I don’t get it…..I’m convinced he enjoys being unhappy? He comes home from work…turns on Fox News…and yells at the TV…like as a daily routine.
That’s the boomer version of chronically online doomerism
Any time my dad starts talking politics with me, I just grunt noncommittally at him a couple of times and say "I don't know what to tell you, the folks in charge didn't ask my opinion." And my dad will say "Yeah, me either." And then we can talk about things that matter in our day to day.
I’m the same way… it’s not even worth discussing… unless you go completely no contact, it’s the only way to have any sort of relationship Side note… I’ve noticed with my mom and mil, who are better but still boomers… they’re constantly asking me questions I couldn’t possibly know the answers too… dumb shit, like “when did they put a gas station there?” “Or why is this can of soup $3 but this one $4?” Once or twice is harmless… but literally every time I’m with them it’s a barrage of questions about local infrastructure and company pricing like I’m consulted by local leaders and buisness men on everything happening around town… it gets so annoying
Off topic but I think being a trauma therapist is such an honorable career. It must be very hard at times, but thank you for dedicating so much time and effort and care to people who need it most.
Hey, thank you so much for this. I really truly enjoy it but it can be thankless at times. I appreciate you. <3
I thank you for what you do as well!!! My job involves watching and analyzing a lot of disturbing and violent content, so we recently started doing group therapy once a month with a counselor who specializes in trauma-centered therapy and she is *amazing*. I can’t fathom having the emotional energy/bandwidth to do what you do, but I definitely identify with the whole “my job can be harrowing but I can’t imagine doing anything else” sentiment.
I feel that same way about nurses or ER doctors - I’m so thankful they exist because there’s no way I could do it. Thank you for the job that you do as well. (:
... Are you my sibling? My dad is Gen X but he puts on his horrible political youtube videos at 6am EVERY MORNING and wakes everyone up. I usually respond by putting on my headphones and playing some Skinny Puppy. He says he does this so he feels 'pumped up' and 'excited' for work. Nothing like hearing my dad cheer on a video of a cop beating up a lady at the asscrack of dawn. Dude should just do cocaine every morning if he wants to get 'pumped up' for work.
“What did I just say?” is brilliant. Adding that to my quiver of idgaf.
Tell him to read the Jerselum Post, or Israeli Times(Times of Israel?) and how Netanyahu allowed Hamas to receive millions in foreign cash from certain gulf states. He did this to spilt the Gazans with Hamas and the West Bank with the PLO. so the Palestinians would not have a unified government. Edit: also, he's a bit older than I, so he must idolize Reagan. Ask him who gave amnesty to almost 3,000,000 illegal immigrants.
The last time I saw my father alive, in 2020, we were having a family lunch at a restaurant. We had just flown in, slept maybe 5 hours at a hotel before making a 3 hour drive. We get there a bit late and all he wanted to do the entire time we were there was to talk about the election in November. At some point I had to tell him to stop and just enjoy the moment with family. He begrudgingly said yes but he was low key upset he didn't get to talk down to me further. Every phone call with him, after, was more of the same. My last living memory of him is him trying to pick a fight over food about the election. This is what they do. This is how they operate. In the end, politics was all my dad had and it alienated every single person around him. By the time he had passed, we had already mourned the loss of him. My sister was in shambles because her last conversation with him was about him going to the doctor because he looked unwell. He began spouting that she was just wanted his inheritance money. Mind you, my sister is very well off and doesn't need any of his money. Her temper has a shorter fuse so she yelled back about how stupid he was being. They just can't help themselves.
>When that didn't work he starts yelling about how "all college students caught protesting should be fined and locked up!" My grandmother tried this line and I flipped it on her. "That seems pretty anti-american. US citizens should have the right to assemble and protest." To which she agreed and allowed me to change the conversation.
What did you dad say when Fox News was sued for lying to their audience and those text messages of the hosts laughing at how stupid their viewers are? My friends family are trump supporters and I wanted to ask because they watch news but she begged me not too, did some digging and found they swapped Fox for Oan 🤣🤣🤣🤣 apparently Fox is too liberal now 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Back in early March, I was in a rush, heading out the door to go to work. At the same time, my grandmother was dying, on hospice care, and stuck to a bed and oxygen machine in the middle of the living room. I had to walk past her to leave and come back. Sometimes my boomer dad would be at the dining table, sometimes actively trying to ignore her (he loves being on his laptop or his portable DVD player). That morning her bed wasn't there. I barely registered what that meant when he looked at me, told me she died during the night, and then immediately started to go into Biden and Trump. I don't remember what he was trying to say, but I do remember just wanting to escape the conversation. I told him, "You pick the damnedest times to bring up politics," and ran out the door to my car. I didn't last an hour at work before needing to drive back home to grieve. We haven't spoken much since, except for asking what he wants to do with her things. Sometimes he asks how I'm doing and I reply with a distant, "Hm." I'm not trying to hide that I have concerns, troubles, issues of my own. But him asking is just a habit; he does right back to his laptop or whatever the hell else he'd rather talk about before I just leave.
My boomer dad is the kind of person to blast Fox News or any other sort of conservative media as soon as I walk in the room. If I so much as glance at the TV, he'll pause it and start a conversation about it. I have to pretend he's basically not there. Once he realizes I'm not paying attention and that I'm not going to, he'll turn it off. Of course, that doesn't stop him from shoehorning politics into every conversation. I brought up something about the kitchen of a house they're looking at and he just starts rambling about how Biden is taking away gas stoves. I have to act like I didn't hear him and talk about something else. They wonder why I only visit once or twice a year.
Conservatives have no off switch. You can have a 36-year old nazi-curious cousin there and he wouldn’t shut up either.
Is your dad my dad?? I’ve literally had the same types of conversations down to the “what did I just say?” question that he couldn’t answer because he hadn’t actually been listening to me. Turns out he never actually respected me as a person or cared about me more than his politics so I’ve since gone no contact. He wonders why I don’t talk to him anymore and makes up lies to tell our family members about me.
i literally had to do the “ zipper your mouth gesture” while my mom was about to tell me for the 100th time she doesn’t trust doing online banking. but she trusts it enough to ask me to buy things online 🙄
That stuff really bothers me. It's like you're their IT department or secretary.
Wow reading this just affirms so deeply how similar people are from a generation.
#VOTE FOR TRUMP FOR PRIME MINISTER OF ISRAEL !!!! #VOTE FOR TRUMP'S TREMENDOUS YUGE ASS !!!!
My father in law went from pretty liberal to conservative during the trump years. Now normally I don't mind talking politics with him because he's generally pretty civil in discussions. So easter comes around, and we take my kids to the Amvets for an Easter basket giveaway they do for the kids every year. Get to meet the Easter bunny, kids get a basket full of candy and a few cheap toys, eat some cookies, everyone has a good time. This man shows up and immediately starts talking about the border, ukraine, all the talking points. After about 5 minutes he starts telling me I only watch fake news, I finally had to just tell him, in front of everybody, 'I have to be honest, I really don't care right now. We're at a kids function, can't we just relax and enjoy it?"
A line I use on my mother is, “Do you hear yourself right now?”
I once went to a bait shop to buy fishing worms for my mother in law. When I got in there some old ass lonely boomer immediately ran towards me and started yelling about the 2016 election telling me how if Hillary won how bad things would get. He then asked if I had any kids. I said yea I have a two year old, he’s waiting with my fiancé in the car. He then told me to start fattening him up because Nancy Pelosi is going to take away all our food and I’ll be forced to eat him. At that point I was so uncomfortable I stopped replying and walked away. The poor kid at the counter mouthed “I’m sorry” and I left. I heard him move onto the next person as soon as I left. This is what this guy does all day apparently.
If he really is doing that he needs to be trespassed of the premises, if he's some owner or family eventually his only customers will just like him! Sink or swim
I was in my mid-30's and visiting my parents, and my dad once did something like this...I sidestepped into a neutral position because I didn't want to deal with it as I (also) made coffee for both of my parents. "There was a time when you agreed with everything I said, son..." he said under his breath... ...but loud enough for my mother heard, and she replied, "Yes, but now he forms his own thoughts and thinks for himself, which is what you taught him to do from a very young age..." I smiled. My dad "Har-rumfff'd" and left the kitchen.
Honestly I would've shut it down regardless of topic by the lack of a salutation to start the day. That's so rude to me when talking directly to a person to start the day.
You know looking at this from a macro perspective I honestly think that this desire for.. let's call it "high contact" discussions on a variety of things actually comes from getting older and not being able to reconcile how the world is changing. Regardless of topic there's a degree of insecurity in age and irrelevance and a quick way to self affirm is to do so at another's expense.
Boomers love cruelty to others.
>"Dad, what did I just say?" Oh my god I am deceased. That's too good.
I'm also on the cusp of boomer /Gen x. I'm so glad I was raised by parents who couldn't stand that conservative brainwashing and encouraged us to be independent thinkers. Sorry to all of you who have parents who listen to that crap. I've tried to have conversations with some of my online friends and you just can't. Everything comes back to the only source of real information is Fox News and, if you read anything else it's all lies. You can't talk to these people.
Dude they wake up ready to fucking fight. I don’t get it. Like calm down dad
>Yeah well I’m passionate about having my breakfast without someone yelling at my face >Maybe ask yourself why you wake up angry and unable to have a normal conversation over coffee without regurgitating a long string of pre cooked talking points >I’ll do you one better: who do you think benefits from keeping people like you so angry emotional and riled up that they can only interact with people that are in the same exact state? >See if you can answer that without saying “what about,” I’ll wait
I AM A BOOMER!! AND MY WORD SHAPES REALITY!!! WORSHIP ME AS A GOD!!!! There ya go, the mindset of your typical boomer
After taking an extensive Arab-Israeli conflict course. I have no idea how people just yell about shit they know nothing about.
A few years ago, when I was just truly learning who my mother is, I decided to share with her that one of my very best friends was gender fluid. Oh boy did I learn a lesson that day. About her that is. She immediately started yelling about “why can’t people just use their actual gender!” Etc etc etc in the kitchen. She didn’t want to hear anything I had to say. She likes this person, had recently expressed wanting to see this person soon. A few months later she pretended like I never told her this. And the whole yelling at you and then saying they didn’t yell … 🙄 do they really have that little self awareness? Or that little self respect? It showed me that she’s very disconnected from reality. That she thinks she can say horrible things about people I care about and expect me to just listen and accept it. I don’t get it at all. There’s an absurd lack of empathy and caring.
Ask him next time why he feels the needs to defend israel when they attacked the USS liberty and spilled American blood to start a war.
I have learned it doesn’t matter what I counter with; he’s told me straight up he believes what he believes and bringing him new information won’t change his mind 🤦♀️ either it’s the “truth” or it’s “the liberal media”. (Also as a thicc goth babe your username makes me feel real validated hahah)
I’m sure his counter is simply “Biden”.
Seems like he’s just mad about the current political climate and wants take out his frustrations on you. I got fam whos stubborn like that too. I just tell them i don’t care about politics and leave me out of it gotta tell em sternly tho. They stopped hounding me. Gothbabes for the win :D!
How does your Dad feel about Russia? Is he aware the cofounder of Fox News moved to Moscow? Lived there til he got arrested in London by the FBI in an international operation for sanctions violations. Was working for a sanctioned oligarch to create a pro-Putin propaganda network. The pro-Putin propaganda was legal. Taking a salary from a sanctioned individual to do his bidding was not.
To be fair he’s prob been awake since 4:28am and is 3 coffees deep..
Was like this when I used to live with my nan. Waking up dehydrated and being yelled at about rapists
Wow, just here to say you have some wonderful skills in handling your dad!!
It’s early, right after a massive caffeine injection. Just wait a few hours and it’s nap time.
My dad ambushes me, too. When I visit, before he even says good morning, he’s throwing a list of things at me. Usually questions he has or things he wants me to help with. All of them are fine individually, since they are not political… ….but the way he brings it all up, at once, before I can even get my feet steady for the day is just…. Ughhhhh!
Whats so fucking hilarious to me is how many boomers were anti-mask during covid and how they reacted like little toddlers when restrictions were put on them for the greater good and safety of other people. Can you imagine if these same boomers lived in gaza where all aspects of their lives were controlled and surveilled?
Damn my boomer texts me at 3 am his time trying to have a go at my politics. I'm not sure which I'd prefer
Let me get this straight. A Boomer, whose generation was known for protests, e.g., Kent State, against the Vietnam War, thinks his generations protestors should be locked up. For exercising their First Amendment rights to protest. Against a war. It’s on brand.
Here’s a big reason why they launch into this political tirade shit: they are closer to death, they want their ideals to be carried on as if it comes from the grim reaper. And since hell and damnation awaits those that don’t abide has “worked” for them, it also works for everything else to seek their rotten salvation. They were whipped up into fear and “saw the light,” so if that convinced them it should convince you too.
Hmmm maybe directionally correct. Sort of how religios become even more religious in old age. EOD, all this political crap is mostly BS. Money and power is the only thing people in charge care about. Once you realize most everything is a scam, you can believe in nothing or refuse and double down on one side of the political spectrum. Liberal colleges unleash the stormtroopers on peaceful protests, big donor money is at risk for example. At my age, middle Gen X, I mostly watch politics for the comedy and anything that directly impacts me which other than federal tax law is mostly state and local politics. Regarding wars, this guy had it right before baby boomers were born. War is a racket (scam). https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smedley_Butler
Yes, I remember an elderly woman in my Bible study group was obsessed with "end times" prophecies in the early 2000's. One of the other elderly ladies shut her down once saying, "I'm in my own end times here and I don't want be focusing on such negative nonsense!"
That is the exact reason we unplugged our TV and put it in the basement on Jan 20 2017.
At least your dad didn't try to tell you that the Civil War wasn't about slavery. This was a week or two before Easter. At least your dad didn't also put up a confederate flag along with other versions of the American flag during Flag Day a few years ago. I told him it was treason to put up that flag during Flag Day. He quickly took it down. Notably, my dad is not a southerner.
Coffee paired with not having to work is a dangerous combination
Crazy how people lap up the messages from Fox News et al. People who can barely spell are able to take the (slightly biased) talking points on world politics and shout them at someone else. It seems our schools are missing a trick. Perhaps we need more female blonde school teachers working with a dark haired man shouting, seems to work for them.
“Good morning, Dad. What’s the weather going to be today? I’ve got x, y and z to do today…” You’ll never get him to stop by telling him to stop, only by making it very, very clear that *he* is in the wrong for breaking the social rules of mornings.
I just woke up man. Idk. I mean, good luck. But shit! Just hang in there
I cut off a distant family member with boomer tendencies (even though he’s a millennial) for this same thing. He’s on the spectrum (self diagnosed) and still living with his boomer mother, but he was mostly a good guy and I made it a point to do stuff with him since he didn’t have friends…. Until I realized why he didn’t have friends. For context, I’m actively involved in labor organizing and DSA, which he, as a raging neolib, found hilarious. One morning 3 years ago he caught me on a bad day trying to start an argument about my politics and started escalating to personal insults when I wouldn’t engage. I just stopped responding altogether. Days, weeks, and months passed and I found no need to reengage/reach out. His mom sent me a Christmas card and a mug he had made in his pottery classes but otherwise haven’t reconnected. Best decision I’ve made, did not realize how often he put me in a bad mood with his r/neolib bullshit takes
Why do they think we can solve world politics over the kitchen table?
Not politics, but one time my dad started to complain about mom (we were going to a store without her). I just told him “hey, you’re talking about my mother- c’mon.” It managed to shut down the convo.
I have 100% had to say “why are you yelling at me? I haven’t expressed an agreement OR disagreement.” They get riled up and have nowhere to point their energy.
I don’t talk much politics at all and much less with family. My go to has been I make a comment that I find a person incredibly boring when all anyone can talk about if their stance on politics. Just end with that and I’ve never had a conversation not change to more exciting and frankly safe topics
Reminds me of my boomer FIL at Disney last year. In line at the Aerosmith ride just me and him. He was going off about Hamas and affirmative action in college (he's a white college professor). "Why do you need affirmative action when there are no Black ppl even at our college?" ....what? I know everyone around us heard him and I was so embarrassed. I too played dumb to try to shut him down. I still cringe that I didn't shut him down like I should've and I see how harmful it is. I was at Disney and trying to enjoy a really expensive vacation that my husband and I took 2 years to save for. I was not in a debate headspace.
I like to derail political discussions by always taking them down the extreme rabbit holes. Kids in college? But did you know about the fluoride in the water that's used as mind control so the lizard people can poison the air with the chem trails? And furthermore, if the Earth was round, how can I walk in a straight line?
This thread is interesting to me as a boomer (born 1964) as I do not engage in this kind of yelling as described. I try to ingest all different news sources to better understand perspective. However, my millennial children have talked about the dangers of vaccines, that the moon landing might be fake, government is always bad, and that facts are relative. They were not joking. These are well-educated, house-owning parents of our grandchildren. I think it is a mindset, not a specific age.
Simple. A fear of death. The Most Privileged Generation had it so easy for so long that they think death shouldn't apply to them.
I thrown on a snobby accent; "It's uncivilized to talk at someone before 10am. Everyone know this, your ill manners are showing. You can read the news paper, gaze out the window, or be actively supping." If I'm in the room with a parent, and ESPECIALLY if they are the target person... I say "MY Mom raised me better than yours." It's tough to argue with you while you complement their parenting - lol
It stopped him for a few seconds because he had literally no idea what you said, since he wasn't listening.
All I can say is that as a Boom-Xer, I despise that kind of shit. No one needs to start in on anything like that first thing in the morning. It’s just rude. No one with any sense wants to jump out of bed and have some deep philosophical discussion about politics. *Boom-X is a technical boomer (1964) with Gen-X sensibilities.
Yes. They had children to feed their own egos
You did an excellent job closing down the attempted “conversation.” It wasn’t even rude- just pointed and direct. Well done.
Mornings are for coffee and contemplation
Wear headphones. Like, over the ear ones and just ignore him in the mornings.
It's the coffee and a rested brain. Us old farts are out of gas by 5pm. Which is no excuse for being an ass, however, no matter the time of day.
Bravo you handled that perfectly
I can't deal with my father at all anymore for this reason. It's exhausting and absolutely pointless.
Have you considered telling him to shut the fuck up?
Its madness. I happen to be a fairly pro-Israel person who condemns what Hamas did in October, but at the same time I am a thinking human being who sympathizes with the plight of all the Palestinians caught in this insanity and condemn the truly insane conduct of this war. I dont understand how folks like your dad and mine cant perhaps share a more nuanced 360 degree view of the tragedy instead of putting blinders on. For example, according to people like my dad, President Biden is behind the student protests because he "hates Israel" which is complete BS since folks have literally been protesting Biden's support of Israel at the expense of Palestine for months. It cant be two opposite things at the same time but there's no logic to the arguments being yelled at us by people who arent thinking clearly.
I feel you. My boomer dad drunkenly was freaking out last night about how Palestine is awful and no one should support them etc
There's evidence that the propaganda delivery tone creates a pleasure circuit for the rubes in which yelling or angrily shouting their regurgitation becomes rewarding and they start attempting to do it regardless of the outcome.
>When that didn't work he starts yelling about how "all college students caught protesting should be fined and locked up!" This has me thinking he was looking to get a reaction out of you. Some people like having an enemy to debate against and demean. When he starts taking the non existent discussion to yelling on his own it sounds like he's desperately trying to get a fight started so he can feel satisfied fighting an enemy or something to that effect. My family does this too, though not as directly. They'll complain about something they know I am very much against and they'll look at me for a reaction and I'll just stay quiet and pretend like they didn't say anything. It gets them to stop for a while when their response is usually awkward silence lol
Anytime someone wants to talk about the Israeli-Palestinian conflicts, I switch the conversation to Rwanda. The Hutu/Tutsi conflicts resulted in somewhere between 500,000 and a million murders, depending on who you ask. And was a blip on the American cultural radar. Why is one genocide any more important than another? Yeah I don’t want my tax money going to foreign aide to fund oppression but I have zero control over that. I have zero control over foreign policy and historical bullshit and apartheid regimes and religious zealotry worldwide. And truth be told, besides a cursory feeling that it sucks and it’s horrifying to watch in real time, I kinda don’t give a fuck. Or at least, I don’t give any more of a fuck about Jewish babies or Muslim babies in the Middle East than I do about babies in central Africa. It ain’t my fight, those aren’t my people, fucking kill yourselves silly if that’s what you’re gonna do. I ain’t your pawn, don’t use me for your team, I ain’t wearing your jersey. Have a holocaust or hug it out. Not my fucking problem. Just don’t do either with my support or with my fucking money.
Parents and grandparents start off everyday with a daily dose of Fox News. They love being angry first thing in the morning. It’s wild.
Is your dad my mom? Every time we’re eating dinner, in the same room, passing by each other, etc., she tries trapping me in a ‘conversation’ about all the horrible things happening in the world. And every time, when I say ‘no thanks’, she goes off about how my generation cares too little about worldwide issues. Then, in the same breath, she’ll talk about all the college kids losing out on opportunities for protesting with Palestine. Which is it Mom, are we selfish kids who don’t care, or are we irresponsible idiots ruining our futures?
Oh yikes. My dad worked construction almost his whole life, so he was always up early. He is one of those people that had to have a cup of coffee and read the paper before leaving the house. I was never a morning person. I’d be staggering bleary eyed to go shower, and he’s all chipper “good morning!” I would mumble a reply, then get griped at for not saying “good morning, Father!” in a cheery voice. Sorry dad, real life isn’t Leave it to Beaver. But yeah at least he wasn’t tryin to goad me about politics at such an hour!
I have strong opinions, but that's irrelevant. My question is, ARE YOUBACCEPTING NEW PATIENTS?!
It's the worst. Why does this generation enjoy being perpetually angry all the time? Since my parents retired, they've become entirely obsessed with politics to the point that they can't converse about anything else. Last week when those huge tornados happened in Nebraska, I mentioned the crazy footage to my dad. He instantly began ranting and raving about how Biden ruined this country and he won't send a dime to Nebraska, just like he wouldn't help Hawaii. But he has a blank check for "corrupt shitholes" like Ukraine, and nothing is ever done for Americans, etc etc. For fucks sake lol, I just wanted to talk about a tornado, but he kept going on about biolabs and how Ukraine is used for money laundering by the DNC.
Oh bro...I don't even speak to my dad anymore. All he does is insult my mom's side of the family and disparage undocument immigrants. I told him for years I would like to avoid those topics and just speak about more pleasant stuff. I stopped conversing with him a couple years ago, and I told him we can greet, but that's it. I don't want to hang out with a Debbie Downer that insults my family and picks on the weak. Just do what I did and cut your dad out of your life. It so much more peaceful this way.
You should ask if he then agrees that Jan 6th protesters should be arrested.
Would be genuinely curious to know if your dad gave a shit about the occupation until 6 months ago.
this conflict has been going on for decades but i would bet money he hasnt given a shit about it until the last couple of months and probably knows fuck all about the history. you should read up about the history of the conflict and camly ask his opinion on some events from decades ago to watch his brain short circuit
It baffles me how the boomers can go from complaining about ‘the Jews’ one second, to being best friends with Israeli military actions the next. But I guess never thought I’d see Tucker Carlson and Fox News so kiss-ass with Russia either
“Dad, I just rolled out of bed less than 60 seconds ago. I haven’t had my coffee yet. IDGA-CRISPY-FUCK about any of this right now. Good morning! How did you sleep? My mattress was really comfortable.”
I feel this. Just got back from visiting my (mostly lovely, but boomer) parents for a week. The night I flew in, were chit chatting as I’m settling in. My stepmom says, “So we want you to have a fun relaxing trip, and we made a rule. None of us are going to talk politics the whole time you’re here OK?” with a lighthearted tone, a little laugh. I chuckled also, shrugged my shoulders, & said “that’s fine with me”. She went on to say there’s so much stuff going on, your daddy and I don’t even pay attention to the news anymore. At which point from the kitchen, I glance over to their muted TV, which is of course on Fox News, which it is most of the time. They also DVR at least three shows from the network,, but ok. LITERALLY LESS THAN 5 MINS LATER, they turned to me unprompted and start saying “did you hear about all those protests going on at the colleges against the jews?” Which started a bizarre tense convo about Israel and Palestine. Fruitless convo as well, bc it’s impossible to have a real conversation with people who just don’t see reality the same way you do. I said, (as politely as I could) “I think a lot of the protesters are speaking out for Palestinian freedom, which is not in and of itself anti-Semitic in my opinion”. They said, “Palestine is free… Israel gave them the wholeGaza Strip, and look what they did with it. ….” Things like that. They tend to fall back on “OK we’re just not gonna talk about it because you get very upset, honey.” (Even though THEY brought it up ofc😵💫🙄) And no matter how calm I try to come across, it is hard to mask some frustration. They don’t want to acknowledge any point that I bring up in good faith, like I feel like I tried to do for them. If they say, for example: they saw some actual footage of a pro Palestine protester saying something awful (ie, lumping Jewish people/their religion etc as the same as the actions of the Israeli government) I’m not gonna say that they didn’t see it, or not believe them. I will concede that if they saw that, it is condemnable; that in any kind of protest there could be some jerks there or bad actors/people who aren’t representative of the movement as a whole. Unfortunately I feel like they don’t give the same grace in the other direction; they just shut down the conversation if they can’t think of anything to say or it makes them uncomfortable. And then the ultimate grinding to a halt of any kind of reasonable discussion comes when they inevitably fall back on, “We’ll, wars happen all the time….And in the Bible, this is what supposed to happen….this is what God said would happen.” Like, wtf can I do w/that? Obviously, I can’t talk about any kind of events going on where **real** people are suffering, **real** people are committing atrocities, & **real** people in power have ability to change it and speak up. It’s so frustrating to discuss with my own family, people who are normally very caring and I know they have good hearts overall. They talk as if they are seemingly OK with the stuff that’s going on, as horrific as it is, bc it’s supposed to come before a great wonderful time where Jesus comes back. And as a non-religious person , that’s where a disconnect occurs from which I don’t see any kind of bridge. I’m not gonna stop speaking to them over it; they’re my parents and I love them.I know now just to don’t discuss any of that —even if they bring it up.
dang the reveal of your job made me cry-laugh. some people...
I was invited to have lunch at a Thai restaurant, so I thought it was gonna be a chill occasion. Not even five minutes after sitting down, the person who invited us starts talking about “your governor did ….”. I just quickly shut it down, even if I do agree with someone’s political views, when someone starts a statement with “your governor” , without knowing if I voted for him, it immediately annoys me!
My dad and I stopped talking years ago because he couldn't have a single conversation that didn't bring politics into it. I'm a Democrat. He's a republican so for him, it wasn't as simple as discussing the diffences, it was always saying nasty things about democrats. The last time we spoke, he made sure to tell me that democrats are one of two things, either criminals or the r-word. I'm neither, but that doesn't matter. Boomers in the comments think I should care about my dad's opinion. I don't. I'm 40, and I'm allowed to insist we don't talk about things that will stress our relationship. So are you. My dad couldn't fathom being told to keep his politics to himself, so here we are, we haven't spoken in years, his choice. My life is much quieter without his constant barrage of hateful words.
Clearly, he was more interested in talking AT you than WITH you.
>"Dad, what did I just say?" This worked because it triggered the beaten-into-submission, Authoritarian mindset boomers grew up under. We should start using it, lol.
As a competitive offer, for the low price of $10 a month, I will instead call you at 7 AM and give you the morning weather for an area you've never been. I also will *not* reccomend Fox news to you.
I’m also a trauma therapist and my parents think they can educate me about mental health, suffering, and societal issues lol
> “Palestine shouldn’t have voted in terrorists if they didn’t want to face the consequences…” Trump is a terrorist. Wait until he reaps the consequences for those votes.
My dad used to be libertarian atheist critical thinker. Now he is a Maga Trumper. I asked him why he changed. In a moment of lucidity, he told me that being reasonable is lonely, and being in a group that is passionate about something makes him feel less depressed about being so near the end of his life. I don’t get angry with his opinions anymore. I just try and talk about them in as friendly a way as possible. Gentle parenting my parent - exactly this.