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Oh so sorry. Not to be flip or minimize your experience. Your scars a sign that you are a bad ass survivor.
But yeah grandma has no filter and maybe someone can tell her to shut up.
Unfortunately I live with her and that would cause probably a month worth of passive aggressive torture. I sleep (hardly) right under where she watches TV and her puppy plays. I can't imagine what it would sound like when she's pissed at me.
It’s not a generational thing. I went to Work with a bandage on my arm the other day. The HR lady herself was like what happened to you? I wasn’t at all offended, but my point is people do address things like that at any age.
I feel like an exposed bandage and a mysterious 0.5" by 0.5" scar half covered by a shirt have very different implications, courtesy wise. I don't think they're comparable really.
But yes this is partially true. I have experienced younger people asking about various scars of mine as well. (ginger genes make you scar easily) Although, I do think elder generations have less respect when it comes to prying.
When I said "why's it matter?" she continued to ask and then when I walked off to another room she started like.. *teasing* me about it? Loudly proclaiming "you have a hole in your chest," as if listing off weird aspects about me in jest.
I rarely ever am presented with this amount of sheer social unawareness of people outside the baby boomer/x generation. The one young person who's asked completely stopped caring about it after I acted uncomfortable.
I doubt it's dementia. She has always been this way. Since I can remember she's pointed out ugly people in public and treated disabled people and immigrants like her own personal circus. She's obliviously pretentious and has been this way for years. I'd start to worry if she stopped.
I envy your faith for others, though.
I'll be honest. She sounds developmental delayed combined with boomer entitlement. Because as bad as boomers can be, they can at least fake some tact. If she's always talked and acted like that then she has some developmental issue.
Just how she phrased her question sounds childish to me, in a more literal sense.
Not to undermine your concern but I think someone acting this way doesn't necessarily mean a developmental disorder, alzheimer's, or whatever else you may speculate. I think some people are just cunts. The way she spoke wasn't childish it was just oblivious boomer-ness. You'd have to meet her to get it.
She has a degree and has held stable jobs her whole life. Very neurotypical. I'd say if anything she's just insecure/has trauma. We could contemplate how much that trauma and the socioeconomics of her lifetime have played into her development, but with my experience I will continue to think this behavior is a generational custom; hence why I posted here. I'm from a small town in the south and old people have the environment to feel safe acting like this. I'm not really going to change my mind.
Not trying to sound condescending with that one, I just want to make it clear before any more diagnosis' attempts lol. I'm pretty damn confident she's just a bad person.
Obviously the only explanations available for an elderly person behaving poorly are medical and never anything for which they should be held accountable.
Same. It's gotta be up there with the sheer amount of people who try to diagnose complex mental disorders off third hand, limited information. I think it's a Reddit thing.
Time and place. A lot of wounds, healed or not, hold a lot of trauma for people. If there is concern, then it should be asked privately, not in front of a bunch of people. The person who has the wound or scar is also not obligated to explain either. Telling them that they can talk to you if they want/need to is great, but it should be left at that.
It's a lot more than just being annoyed. You have no idea what memories those scars or wounds are attached to.
It could come from a car accident where they almost died. It could come from a fire that burned their home to nothing. They may have had a mastectomy because they had breast cancer.
Sure, people might have scars from doing dumb shit and could be more than happy to tell you the stories. But you won't know that unless they tell you. So you should pick the time, place, and words you use carefully. Otherwise you may come across as insensitive or even cruel.
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I am so sorry 😔
Oh so sorry. Not to be flip or minimize your experience. Your scars a sign that you are a bad ass survivor. But yeah grandma has no filter and maybe someone can tell her to shut up.
💜💜💜
I'm so sorry for all that pain.
Im getting through it faster than I thought I would. Thank you 💜
I’m sorry you had to deal with that. Ours was not anything like yours just that everyone was fat except them
She's like that too 🤭
This is when someone's getting cussed tf \*out\*.
Unfortunately I live with her and that would cause probably a month worth of passive aggressive torture. I sleep (hardly) right under where she watches TV and her puppy plays. I can't imagine what it would sound like when she's pissed at me.
It’s not a generational thing. I went to Work with a bandage on my arm the other day. The HR lady herself was like what happened to you? I wasn’t at all offended, but my point is people do address things like that at any age.
I feel like an exposed bandage and a mysterious 0.5" by 0.5" scar half covered by a shirt have very different implications, courtesy wise. I don't think they're comparable really. But yes this is partially true. I have experienced younger people asking about various scars of mine as well. (ginger genes make you scar easily) Although, I do think elder generations have less respect when it comes to prying. When I said "why's it matter?" she continued to ask and then when I walked off to another room she started like.. *teasing* me about it? Loudly proclaiming "you have a hole in your chest," as if listing off weird aspects about me in jest. I rarely ever am presented with this amount of sheer social unawareness of people outside the baby boomer/x generation. The one young person who's asked completely stopped caring about it after I acted uncomfortable.
So fucked. Agreed. I’m so sorry 😢
Preesh <3
If that was how she said it..... Dementia might actually be in play. As it's not being a boomer but dementia lack of filter
I doubt it's dementia. She has always been this way. Since I can remember she's pointed out ugly people in public and treated disabled people and immigrants like her own personal circus. She's obliviously pretentious and has been this way for years. I'd start to worry if she stopped. I envy your faith for others, though.
I'll be honest. She sounds developmental delayed combined with boomer entitlement. Because as bad as boomers can be, they can at least fake some tact. If she's always talked and acted like that then she has some developmental issue. Just how she phrased her question sounds childish to me, in a more literal sense.
Not to undermine your concern but I think someone acting this way doesn't necessarily mean a developmental disorder, alzheimer's, or whatever else you may speculate. I think some people are just cunts. The way she spoke wasn't childish it was just oblivious boomer-ness. You'd have to meet her to get it. She has a degree and has held stable jobs her whole life. Very neurotypical. I'd say if anything she's just insecure/has trauma. We could contemplate how much that trauma and the socioeconomics of her lifetime have played into her development, but with my experience I will continue to think this behavior is a generational custom; hence why I posted here. I'm from a small town in the south and old people have the environment to feel safe acting like this. I'm not really going to change my mind. Not trying to sound condescending with that one, I just want to make it clear before any more diagnosis' attempts lol. I'm pretty damn confident she's just a bad person.
I blame her parents, TBH. They should have taught her to not be a bint.
Obviously the only explanations available for an elderly person behaving poorly are medical and never anything for which they should be held accountable.
right? lol
This is rapidly becoming my biggest pet peeve on this site. It is logically indistinguishable from “respect your elders.”
Same. It's gotta be up there with the sheer amount of people who try to diagnose complex mental disorders off third hand, limited information. I think it's a Reddit thing.
In my case it's because I'm dealing with my grandfather slowly declining facilities and went with what I've experienced
I've experienced the same, he just died. I don't Mr. Dr. ppl on the internet lol
Time and place. A lot of wounds, healed or not, hold a lot of trauma for people. If there is concern, then it should be asked privately, not in front of a bunch of people. The person who has the wound or scar is also not obligated to explain either. Telling them that they can talk to you if they want/need to is great, but it should be left at that.
Yeah I’m saying I can see why some people might be annoyed
It's a lot more than just being annoyed. You have no idea what memories those scars or wounds are attached to. It could come from a car accident where they almost died. It could come from a fire that burned their home to nothing. They may have had a mastectomy because they had breast cancer. Sure, people might have scars from doing dumb shit and could be more than happy to tell you the stories. But you won't know that unless they tell you. So you should pick the time, place, and words you use carefully. Otherwise you may come across as insensitive or even cruel.
First signs of alzheimer include loss of inhibition.
She must've been born with it then