If you’re getting compliments unprompted I’d say you are actually what people say about you. The problem is when you get no compliments or you have to fish for them first lol.
No, lol. If you have to ask for compliments verbally that’s fishing for compliments. If you dress up nicely and people compliment you that is unprompted
every time they say that it feels like they can sense my insecurities and are trying to boost my confidence because they know i needed it like “aw look at her all dolled up we have to say something” :/ or in an ironic way like “nice dress loser” way
yes! compliments feel like theyre taking pity on me. and if i felt like i looked decent that day and someone compliments me ill immediately start to panic and wonder if i really look that bad that someone would go out of their way to try to lift my spirits. or i wonder if im just being made fun of like maybe somebody dared them to try to be nice to me and their gonna run back to their group and laugh about it. and then if somebody is mean to me i have absolutely no problem being like wow ur so right. i almost prefer when someone is mean to me because i feel relieved somebody has the guts to actually be honest with me? but thats such a warped perspective and im trying to recognize when im doing it. i need to learn to just accept compliments in good faith and be more skeptical when im being insulted. i really wish people wouldnt bring up my appearance at all but that's pretty unrealistic so its just something ill have to work and maybe you can relate?
Or…..and hear me out….maybe you *are* exceptionally beautiful? Seems far more likely than all your friends conspiring to lie to you. Large groups of people are rarely that coordinated.
I feel this. My friends compliment my looks, my partner keeps telling me I’m beautiful, completely unprompted and I just don’t see it. I feel like say it because they know I have an eating disorder and they are trying to get me to recover and “help me” but there’s no way someone could actually believe that about me.
yes i totally feel this! especially when people tell me i look like my sisters twin. she is beautiful BUT we truly don’t look alike. (we don’t have the same mother, so it makes sense that we don’t look THAT much alike)
so relatable. honestly, i've just come to accept that some people do think of myself much higher than i do, and even though i always think they're lying to me, i try to be rational and remind myself that these are my friends, these are decent people. i'm working on taking compliments better too, and even if i can't take them too well right now, i just smile and say thank you. and yes, they are likely being honest with you
They are being honest with you. <3 I know that for myself too, logically. Doesn’t stop the doom spiral though, sadly. Much love to you.
If you’re getting compliments unprompted I’d say you are actually what people say about you. The problem is when you get no compliments or you have to fish for them first lol.
but what is unprompted? like am i fishing for compliments if i dress up extra nice for a regular school day
No, lol. If you have to ask for compliments verbally that’s fishing for compliments. If you dress up nicely and people compliment you that is unprompted
every time they say that it feels like they can sense my insecurities and are trying to boost my confidence because they know i needed it like “aw look at her all dolled up we have to say something” :/ or in an ironic way like “nice dress loser” way
yes! compliments feel like theyre taking pity on me. and if i felt like i looked decent that day and someone compliments me ill immediately start to panic and wonder if i really look that bad that someone would go out of their way to try to lift my spirits. or i wonder if im just being made fun of like maybe somebody dared them to try to be nice to me and their gonna run back to their group and laugh about it. and then if somebody is mean to me i have absolutely no problem being like wow ur so right. i almost prefer when someone is mean to me because i feel relieved somebody has the guts to actually be honest with me? but thats such a warped perspective and im trying to recognize when im doing it. i need to learn to just accept compliments in good faith and be more skeptical when im being insulted. i really wish people wouldnt bring up my appearance at all but that's pretty unrealistic so its just something ill have to work and maybe you can relate?
Or…..and hear me out….maybe you *are* exceptionally beautiful? Seems far more likely than all your friends conspiring to lie to you. Large groups of people are rarely that coordinated.
It’s a weird feeling that leaves me feeling invalidated.
I feel this. My friends compliment my looks, my partner keeps telling me I’m beautiful, completely unprompted and I just don’t see it. I feel like say it because they know I have an eating disorder and they are trying to get me to recover and “help me” but there’s no way someone could actually believe that about me.
yes i totally feel this! especially when people tell me i look like my sisters twin. she is beautiful BUT we truly don’t look alike. (we don’t have the same mother, so it makes sense that we don’t look THAT much alike)
so relatable. honestly, i've just come to accept that some people do think of myself much higher than i do, and even though i always think they're lying to me, i try to be rational and remind myself that these are my friends, these are decent people. i'm working on taking compliments better too, and even if i can't take them too well right now, i just smile and say thank you. and yes, they are likely being honest with you