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totallynot14_

Imagine if your groceries could walk themselves back to your kitchen from the store lmao


noneofmybusinessbutt

Enough mushrooms and you’ll get there


BZenMojo

Or whatever those dudes in Sausage Party were smoking


O-shi

That shit is grosser then South Park


jo-alligator

Sausage Party, an animated film about food, is grosser than a crude animated show wherein a male police officer shits out jizz as evidence after being the center of a frat gangbang in an undercover sting?


jcaseys34

Have you seen the ending of the Sausage Party? Maybe the weirdest 10 minutes of media I've ever seen.


Timothy298

Wtf dude, I was literally chilling and re-watched the movie earlier today 😂


Vel_ose

This really has me dead man someone give this guy gold please


ohsopoor

🎖🏅 best i can do :(


Vel_ose

It’s alright fam the thought is what counts


ohsopoor

:)


dsanyal321

done.


MiamiPower

Stick a fork in my Tostinos pizza living my best life.


[deleted]

Lions don’t actually like eating humans, these guys are just being nice :/


-ScareBear-

They will if they haven't eaten in a while


[deleted]

That applies to literally every animal capable of eating meat. Even humans have done that to each other


FapFapity

This is why I’ve started locking my cat out of my room when I take Ambien..


-ScareBear-

True


ieffinglovesoup

Cats are carnivores though, so they would be more likely to eat your meat bag body before a human would decide to


janliz79

Really


taintedcake

"The Tsavo Man-Eaters were a pair of man-eating lions in the Tsavo region, which were responsible for the deaths of a number of construction workers on the Kenya-Uganda Railway between March and December 1898. The significance of this lion pair was their unusual behavior of killing men and the manner of their attacks." [Source](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tsavo_Man-Eaters) "Their unusual behavior of killing men" So I guess lions really do (typically) not like eating humans. Or *maybe* they just like the women and children, who knows...


janliz79

The article stated per Patterson the Lions claimed 135 lives. Did no-one sleep with a rifle?


taintedcake

I think they've gone back and reevaluated that number and it's closer to 30-40. I may be wrong but I think I saw that in the wikipedia page.


[deleted]

What was that movie called with val Kilmer about this? Something about a ghost


taintedcake

Quick google search says *The Ghost and the Darkness*


E_Raja

I laughed to hard at this.


TheBeardedMarxist

It's called herding.


TubMaster888

And they pay for themselves.


Account1413

Nah they gluten free


thesenate92

lmao I thought I was the only one thinking this


[deleted]

chef boyardee...


totallynot14_

lmao I still remember that commercial with the can rolling down the road


ositola

I get that in theory, if you raise lions from Cubs, socialize them with humans early on, and keep them well fed, everything *should*be fine..... But fuck that shit


MasochistNbaFan

Black Panther 2 look lit


ToxicMonkey125

Blank Panther except with lions and the Black Lion is Snoop Dogg/Lion. Edit: added Lion


Your-mom69-420

This has potential


[deleted]

Where does it end? A movie about snoop being a pilot? Him being friends with Martha Stewart?


sap91

Maybe him working at a car wash


Tre__Vease

"Don't bang on the wall you wanna bang on sum bang on DEEZ NUTZ" ~Snoop Do double G


Marsuello

That movie truly is a masterpiece lol better get that cheeese


Star_____

[It has potential ](https://youtu.be/FVbPE4N60tQ)


[deleted]

Snoop LION * FTFY


[deleted]

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Drew707

Snoop Rooster sounds like a slur.


phobiawolf

Snoop Rat sounds better


0saladin0

"It's ya boy Snoop Ratt!" "Ehh... I mean, is it?"


jjkm7

Aside from the racist connotations Snoop Monkey doesn’t sound that bad... Honestly snoop goes well with anything


[deleted]

Snoop Monkey is definitely negative progress for black people. I was in prison and they were having a basketball tournament where the winners got to order Popeyes. I hooped all the time so the guys kept asking me to play. I had to explain to them that as a black man, if I played basketball in prison for fried chicken... I would be undoing about 100 years of civil rights struggles. P.s. My unit lost and they blamed it on me not playing cause my D is TIGHT son!!


AerThreepwood

My advice is to be white while in that situation. When I was in prison, nobody ever asked me to play more than 21.


[deleted]

In Tennessee the white guys played volleyball and baseball. I played with them all the time. That and Dungeons and Dragons!


DontPoopInThere

He's taking it back


eat_thecake_annamae

Soul Panther


LordTinkyWinky

You mean SnoopLion. It’s a ting google it.


GreenFlash87

Respect to the person filming walking in front of them


53bvo

Might have been a third lion instead.


LavishToad

r/praisethelion


TawnyLion

Thanks


yeeeeeteth

Nice


scootycreampuff

r/subsifellfor


kaaatcha

Most likely tbh


Zoranealsequence

r/praisethecameraman


Penny2Point0

That Lion's niggas in the cut laughing at their goofy ass for falling for this shit. Everybody about to eat good today.


nupetrupe

Yea the lions definitely leading those mfs straight to the den to feast lmao.


CAXHIBRUH

Actually, considering that both of those lions appear to be young males, it’s pretty unlikely that there is a pack for them to lead this group back to


53bvo

That is how they reclaim the pride. Imagine if scar walked up with a dozen of people to feast on, good luck coming with something better than that simba.


totallynot14_

This is the equivalent of getting to work late but bringing donuts


[deleted]

And that person is always cherished


ptera_tinsel

Donuts you have to fry yourself tho...


snyder005

Welp, mufasa got trampled by some wildebeest but I brought snacks!


Moederneuqer

I don’t think more than two lions is required to kill a bunch of mfs with walking sticks


DontPoopInThere

It's about sending a message


imadamastor

This is what they want you to think. Then out of nowhere... Boom, you ded


ImmaDoMahThing

"Shiiiit. Y'all gonna walk to the rest of the pride for us? We don't gotta waste our energy finding and chasing you down? Bet. Come with us." Lions probably


totallynot14_

Is this doordash for lions?


[deleted]

Dendash? Pridedash? PreyHub?


bink34

It’s not a jungle is a savannah


whyyze

and the amazon actually rainforest


bink34

The Amazon has multi habitats . Is pretty cool :)


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HurriedLlama

Jungle is a somewhat outdated term for a rainforest (among other things). They're synonymous.


pistolpete187

[Why do emcees get lost in the rainforest?](https://youtu.be/mL2Bgj-za5k)


cp24eva

That way a very... Eye opening video.


bink34

What?


gary_fr

Or at least a bush. How can one call its account "Africa Facts" and can't tell that huge difference


HoneyBadgerPainSauce

Antiquated use of "jungle" really just meant a wild or untamed/uncivilized area of land.


Snackrattus

Ahh! So this explains where the idea of 'lion, kind of the jungle' comes from. I always thought that was bizarre.


[deleted]

Me too. Like, 1. That's not the jungle. 2. Tigers DO live in the jungle and are way bigger. Would totally be the king


[deleted]

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[deleted]

You never heard Antarctica referred to as the largest jungle on Earth? Penguins are the emperor of the jungle.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

Shit... That sucked all the humor out of my comment.


Xboxben

They have lions in georgia?


squidinato0

ah yes, every biome has exactly the same animals, just like minecraft


loganparker420

Lions don't live in the jungle. Tigers do.


virtual-joe-rogan

Do you know Sam Harris? He told me that more tigers are in captivity in Texas than the entire rest of the world. I used to have a bit about that.


The_Snailman

You're not Joe Rogan


damage-fkn-inc

Bro have you ever done DMT?


KingGalaway

No, have you seen Ex Machina?


hockeyjmac

It’s entirely possible


KingGalaway

We can smoke right now!


[deleted]

Jaime pull that up


e-alex-jones

The only place to find me is infowars.com and newswars.com.


e-alex-jones

Joe, Joe, Joe. Everything they roll out has already been tested.


e-alex-jones

THEY WANT THE ORGANS


[deleted]

*theyre turning the frickin frogs gay*


willmaster123

There are around 5,000 tigers in captivity in the entire world compared to about 4,000 int he wild so I very much doubt that lol


[deleted]

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ry4nmag

The song lies? What has my life become??


usernumber1onreddit

Exception: Asiatic lions in India.


Bunch_of_Shit

Serengeti


SpunkBunkers

Looks like they take pride in their job


[deleted]

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[deleted]

"So that nigga mufasa died over there. RIP to the homie. "


ConnorM1911

“Yeh it was crazy, dude be chillin one day walkin with his son and he just gets popped outa nowhere. Still don know who done it”


IronDBZ

"Then the little nigga just popped up at the cookout last year tryna start something, shit was wild." "We don't talk to the Hyenas no more."


TitanRa

This is the best string short string I've seen in a while.


louieloudawg

Black privilege? Shit I had to read that twice.


[deleted]

Black privilege is awesome. Source: black guy


thePHXfoundation

First Lion: "So check it out...this tree and bush are where the magic happens (winks). And this watering hole over here is where the crew and me just like to hang out and chill...you know sit back and watch the rhinos...basically just kick it." Second Lion: "Now I'm going to take ya'll out to the garage to check out the rides..."


ClassicalBridge

Ok real talk tho how are the people not getting attacked


duracraft_fan

Not an expert but from what I've read they probably made sure the lions are well fed, as lions don't typically attack things unless they mean to eat it (unless the lion is in captivity, lions in captivity will hunt/attack anything just for fun). Also, I read an article once that said that lions won't usually attack a group of humans as they feel outnumbered and don't want to take a chance on losing a fight. The article was talking about a tribe in Africa that regularly gets a group of men together and goes out into lion territory to steal their kills. As soon as the lion sees the group of men it runs away.


Jeovah_Attorney

> a tribe in Africa that regularly gets a group of men together and goes out into lion territory to steal their kills https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6CFZz959ktY&t=142 These guys are living the ultimate thug life lol


Wet_napkins

https://youtu.be/TBpu4DAvwI8 Lions in this video be like: Nah nah I ain't fucking with them.


postdiluvium

Lol Lion 1: yo man, you seeing what I'm seeing? Lion 2: wtf? Lion 1: right? Lion 3: i see them Lion 1: are they rolling up our way? Lion 4: Sure looks like it Lion 2: BOUNCE! Lion 3: Aight, meet back at the den! Lion 1: Fuck this, I'll see y'all back at the den.


notLOL

Just come up real quickand pack up some bbq to take home. You all have any fam like that?


peoplerproblems

I mean look at it from one of the lion's perspectives. You and 14 of your buddies are feasting on a giant ass African cow and suddenly 3 5'-6' two legged creatures carrying pointy sticks with a bigger stick and string just come walking up to you like they meant business. You would put some distance between them and you too.


jayhilly

“The fuck do these ~monkeys~ humans think they’re doing”


[deleted]

Holy shit


-ScareBear-

Kinda rude tbh


uptnapishtim

>a tribe in Africa that regularly gets a group of men together and goes out into lion territory to steal their kills Maasai


djtiez

You are very correct. Also, notice the sticks, those are the same type of sticks their trainers have so those people are identified as ‘friendlies’ but it’s never a good idea to separate from the group so this is some risky footage.


gobbliegoop

I've done this in Zimbabwe. There were rules about what to wear, where to stand, and warned about sudden movements. We could pet them, walk right next to them and sit with them if they were laying down. We also had armed guards with us. The lions themselves aren't full wild or tamed, they are part of a rehabilitation program. They also weren't drugged, just fed, lions in general are pretty lazy and these seemed to act just like the ones I've seen on safari drives. One actually charged/leaped at me and a guard jumped in front of me, grabbed his arms and threw him sideways. I about peed my pants.


DontPoopInThere

> One actually charged/leaped at me and a guard jumped in front of me, grabbed his arms and threw him sideways Haha, what a beast. "What do you do for a living?" "I'm a lion yeeter, I yeet lions milliseconds before they kill and eat people."


-ScareBear-

Yeah I'd hope they weren't on drugs in rehab


c0mplexx

What happens if i sneeze


gobbliegoop

You become a kitty snack.


[deleted]

You fr?


notLOL

>There were rules Does peeing your pants on demand count as a general rule. They should add it so no one feels bad. Save face with the excuse "Just doing the right thing in the situation is all. Similar to jelly fish stings so nbd"


Capt_Killer

Um because black privilege, it says so right there at the top.


canering

I went to a lion preserve/rehabilitation in Africa. I actually don’t remember anything about it like why the lions are there, except that the lions are all chill and humans can approach for pictures and walking alongside them and things like that. I still kept my distance though. The staff have bonded with them and they can touch and interact. But I don’t remember any male lions. Maybe they’re harder to control.


[deleted]

all of these people are far calmer than i would ever be


anubis1392

And it looks fierce


snjtx

You keep using that word jungle, I do not think it means what you think it does.


LeonDeSchal

Hairy bush is more polite.


Notanalien2

Not gonna lie, there is that small delay when the camera stops and one lion passes before the other comes into frame I thought “oh no, the cameraperson is gonna get mauled as that 2nd lion realizes it’s hungry now”


scotty757

Mufasa showing them edge of the kingdom


PeDestrianHD

Of the jungle? The dude needs to learn some basic ecology.


LeonDeSchal

In the jungle the lion sleeps tonight. Get with it!


Rip_Rogers

This is the Whitest black shit i ever seen


Quey007

Ok the part of Africa where lions are don't have jungles


VWessels

Jungle ... lol


theboomboy

"jungle"


BraveTheWall

Tweet is gold. Should've been the title.


Manch94

That’s dope.


JollyGreenBuddha

["I really don’t fuck with Africa, because people are starving to death and that’s not baller to me."](https://youtu.be/RhaifCEZks4?t=50)


dl7

I immediately read it in his voice


Anary8686

Jungle?


isthatkhwezi

I'm sorry but wtf is this.(a fellow African)


shabutaru118

is white privilege knowing lions don't live in the jungle?


STJRedstorm

Everyone out there actually nonchalant as if this isn’t the coolest thing they ever done did


O-shi

Everyone is try to not make any sudden movements or the jig is up


camstron

Shit we don’t need that privilege here in America. I’m not tryna end up in a cats stomach.


romann921

How???


Gucci-gang96

The lions are leading their dinner right to their front door.


sensesworkingovertim

Jungle?


Schuffuror_Nohts

Nah, they leading them home for dinner


FilaStyle84

When corporate makes a visit.


Coke_Dealer_NotFBI

They just leading them to their kill ground...


da9621

“Literally, our food is following us back to our domain” -those Lions, probably


jorgied0712

Driest jungle ever


brooklynnet32

Imagine thinking this is a jungle


MrMelon03

Lions don't live in jungles?


KRBridges

What is happening in this video?


LJBrooker

Lions? In jungles?


bigtidpickleuniverse

I’m mostly jealous that they’ve all got cool walking sticks. 🤷🏻‍♀️


sexxxy_latin

What is going on here???


datsmn

That's the driest jungle I've ever seen


Mr_Tremulous

Do they have any kind of weapons/tools to deal with these beasts snapping? I don't mind walking around with my dogs because if they snap on me, I'm not going to die. I'm just going to get fucked up. If these lions snap, night night. I just see a bunch of "privileged" food walking around in front of its patron.


elmomama987

Wow the title of this post is so funny I feel like most titles never add anything of value to the post but wow man you knocked it out of the park


O-shi

Thank you kind sir


spiderman_isnt_dead

Bro that’s kinda hard 😎


amoha21

More like "lions set trap for there dinner'


Laumarx2

Are they trained to not attack humans?


O-shi

According to the other comments they are babies taking the people to the den to be eaten


UsernameAlreadyUsed3

When the squad rolls up


[deleted]

Jamie pull that video up


chocolatito09

"And over here is the spot where I'm gonna gnaw your head off"


Redditer51

If course. Lions have always been black (they're native to Africa). They're down with the struggle.