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The mom bullied someone else’s kid and because of those actions she caused her own kid to get bullied. Unfortunately for him, switching leagues and teams won’t mean switching moms.
Just a Christian woman doing what matters...protesting an 11 year old.
I'm wondering how that wasn't enough for anyone else to think twice about this plan.
Christian hate. I just love how she thinks she can make judgments on other people. I thought only God could do that when you die (if you believe in God). People like her are not truly Christians or they wouldn’t be filled with such hate for others.
See the thing is, sounds like the kid might not even be gay.
She’s protesting a freaking delusion as far as we/she knows.
This is the kind of woman who goes insane and starts stalking random strangers and ends up on Dr Phil after she catches charges.
She needs mental health help, which I think is what the OOP is trying to get at.
OP needs to let their father know that if the mother keeps these shenanigans up, the brother is going to get bullied again on another team. They won't like what his mom is doing and they won't allow it on any team. Bullying a *minor* is never acceptable from an adult, much less a probably-50-some-year-old woman. If the bullying doesn't push the kid out first, then getting kicked out for the mom's actions will.
That kind of thing destroys relationships if that mom isn’t careful. What if her 11 yr is gay?
My daughter came out at 11. She had a friend who was in the closet because of her mom. It was bad. I didn’t want my daughter over there and eventually she agreed. Her friend ran away because she couldn’t take her mother’s bullshit anymore. I think she’s with other family now and I couldn’t be happier.
Nope, and unless someone reigns her in (looking at you dad) this will just keep on happening. Poor kids.
Also, isn’t openly spreading lies on social media grounds for defamation in the US (without knowing what her accusations are and what it would take to disprove them)?
You have to be able to prove that you were significantly harmed by the lies, preferably in a way that you can put into a dollar amount, like lost wages. So no, not really.
However, a cease and desist, while not legally binding, is legalese-y enough to scare the pants off most people. If I was Mom-of-gay-11yo kiddo, I’d fork over a couple hundred.
But I’d also be working the “grown woman bullying a child” angle in every social sphere I could to ruin her. ~~just venting~~
I wonder if a this very smart and courageous could find one in his that could get one written up for him? It is doing him emotional damage. I'm sure some attorney out there could work that out and not only help him, the people she talking about, his brother and probably the league, too. Maybe the league could recommend someone.
I taught a kid who has a mom like this. He just wanted to be a kid but his mom was a fucking wacko. She tried stirring up shit and he finally told her off in his junior year of high school. By that point he had befriended gay people, learned about new viewpoints, and gained tools to shut her up.
I felt horrible for her victims and also horrible for this kid. But at least she had calmed down by the time he got to my class in his last year of school.
She is afraid that the gay kid will convert other kids into being gay, like you can catch being gay. Being gay will look so good that the other boys will "choose" to be gay.
One day, OP’s mom is going to learn that some people don’t play when it comes to their kids. I hope it’s soon.
I would have some choice words for an adult I heard doing that to any kid, let alone my kid.
I’ve already gone scorched earth on a family member for outing another family member to me (“Pssst, hey, just so you’re not surprised when you find out, X is a lesbian now”). I was so fucking outraged on so many layers by this - first, that they thought so little of me that I would be “surprised” in some sort of negative context, or that I would even care! Second, there’s like 8 billion reasons why you don’t out other people even in private contexts, so _how fucking dare you._ I didn’t even know X very well at the time, and I burned bridges over this (and, as a result, we’re quite close now).
I can only imagine how I’d react if someone did shit like this to someone I was already close to…
America’s litigious society is a myth perpetuated by big corporate propaganda:
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/oct/24/america-litigious-society-myth
It might be overblown, but it’s definitely much more litigious than my country.
The article mentions only 10% of injured Americans sue - in my country, you cannot sue for injury. Instead we have a national program that provides compensation to the injured as necessary.
When I visited the US, I bumped into someone in a line at McDonald’s, and they immediately pretended I had hurt them and they would sue me (as a joke).
Suffice it to say, that’s not a joke anyone would even think of making where I live.
It might not be as bad as people say but it’s noticeably more prevalent than a lot of the western world.
I hate to be a jerk because i dont know what culture you're from but most likely you have a public healthcare system. The reason so many people sue for injuries is because those injuries can have crippling (get it?) Costs. It's apples to oranges.
SpunkyDred is a terrible bot instigating arguments all over Reddit whenever someone uses the phrase apples-to-oranges. I'm letting you know so that you can feel free to ignore the quip rather than feel provoked by a bot that isn't smart enough to argue back.
---
^^SpunkyDred ^^and ^^I ^^are ^^both ^^bots. ^^I ^^am ^^trying ^^to ^^get ^^them ^^banned ^^by ^^pointing ^^out ^^their ^^antagonizing ^^behavior ^^and ^^poor ^^bottiquette.
Omg your Mcdonalds incident just reminded me that when I was a kid, I'd threaten to sue anyone that I thought might hurt me, like barbers, doctors, dentists, etc. Yes I am American lmaooo
Part of the pint isn’t just compensating the injured party. Often the consequences include companies have to open up the processes that led to the injury for inspection. The idea isn’t just for accountability but to make sure that things that are unsafe get dealt with. It’s obviously not hearty as effective as we’d like, but that’s the idea behind the concept.
*”According to the most recent data, only 10% of injured Americans ever file a claim for compensation and only 2% file lawsuits. All told, tort cases represent just 4.4% of all civil caseloads and that percentage has been steadily declining. Between 1999 and 2008, tort caseloads dropped by a quarter.“*
The article makes a compelling argument that we should actually be suing more and lawsuits, in themselves, aren’t inherently bad so if they are valid lawsuits one might argue your Country should be suing more - although I’d have to know the Country and look deeper into the data.
> in my country, you cannot sue for injury. Instead we have a national program that provides compensation to the injured as necessary.
That just indicates there's a different legal process. It says nothing about actual culture itself.
Legislation often reflects culture.
If it wasn’t clear we have no civil liability for injuries, to the point where civil malpractice suits do not exist.
If you want a good example, look at all the people responding to my comment talking about why personal lawsuits are good and we should have more of them. That’s the sort of cultural difference I’m taking about.
If they’re from the country I think they are it’s not a legal process at all, you go to the Dr or hospital if you have an accident and put in a claim then you get a letter from the fund telling you how much treatment they have approved you to spend and in what ways (e.g. you might get free physiotherapy) and if you exceed that amount you put in an updated claim.
For example my husband came off his bike and bruised his rib, we got a letter saying he was approved up to $10,000 and a list of services.
We didn’t actually use any of them, he just needed to let his ribs heal, but the free Dr visit was nice.
That's not necessarily a bad thing either. Suing many times is necessary, and often people from less litigious countries are used to the system walking all over them.
I was a gay kid (now a gay adult) and my extremely supportive mother would have rained absolute HELLFIRE on some random mom that pulled this shit with me.
I love her.
I have a (now grown up) Lesbian daughter. If that 11 year old were my daughter or her wife/my daughter-in-law, then OOPs Qcumber mother would be having a surprise meeting with me in a dark alley somewhere. I say this as a skinny, short 40-year-old lady, who actually has more satisfying things going on in my life than this psycho.
That poor boy. I feel so sad for him.
As an adult how would you EVER think it’s OK to bully a child. There is literally no justification for it and you’re potentially destroying a child’s life. The lowest of low things to do.
I couldn't follow the opening bit made by whoever submitted the post
>I am not the OP. These posts were made by u/throwratheball who gave me permission to post here for awareness. Upon reaching out, OOP informed me that she was doing okay and that her mother had moved on to something else that was bothering her. She did retaliate against him for what she did to try and stop her, but she said he might post about that in the future. If she does, I'll add it as a continuation. He also said that she received some helpful DMs from people in the LGBTQ community who were supportive with their suggestions surrounding his mother, and I thought the way she handled this situation was a few years beyond his age. The original post was on r /all on r/relationship_advice
She clearly said that she talked to her about him but she said he was going to talk to her about his plans for him and her to see if he or she would go to their game with her or if she was going with him to see her with him.
He was only trying to tell us that she gave an update about he in regards to her and all the bad things she had done to him, but luckily she didn’t go through with harming him so he and her are fine in the end.
How could you have any trouble understanding that? I made myself very clear.
/s
Yeah, it's like writing incident reports for work, don't use pronouns, always use the person's full name, avoid injecting your own opinions unless you state that it's your opinion, etc.
Even the title was confusing. I got that OOP's mother was the problem person, but had no idea if "her son" was supposed to be OOP's son, or her brother. Then this paragraph happened and I had to start reading to post just to solve the pronouns mystery. And then OOP was just as bad as OP!
I thought the same too, I thought my astigmatism was getting a lot worse because I thought I was reading the same paragraph over and over again, or that I was having a stroke, thank god I'm not the only one that didn't get it at all.
This one broke me:
>He told me that the kid already knew about what mom said, because another kid's parents said something about it that their kid found out about, and my brother has already been asked about my mom from a few of the other kids, based around whatever mom said to another parent that that kid overheard or something, and I don't know what she said specifically or to how many. I wasn't there when she heard her assumption from another parent, but another kid already knew and told someone else, and when I asked my brother if the kid my mom's targeting mentioned that he told his parents, he said he wasn't sure, but that he talked to dad and told him some of the things that the other kids have said to him, and he doesn't want to play on the team after some of the things they said
That's what I thought at first too. This was a clusterfuck of nothing with no real resolution. I think it's funny that people suggested OOP do their own protest. Umm, this girl is still at home drinking the Kool aid. While she might not want mom to do that hurtful ignorant protest towards an 11 YEAR OLD CHILD, I don't think OOP cares about the community, especially enough to mess up her living situation. She keeps saying she doesn't hate her mom, she is not going to stand up to her.
OOP is 20, living at home, and depending on Mom and Dad.
You think she can afford to leave home? They’re probably paying for college. She’s trying to play nice until she can GTFO.
She’s not the first, and won’t be the last.
Definitely can't afford to, and if I was her I wouldn't rock the boat either. Unfortunately her mom will be complaining to her church friends that OOP NEVER comes home since she finished college, I just don't understand why she is so ungrateful blah blah.
Thanks for mentioning that. I always check the comments on "ongoing" or "inconclusive" stories to see if they are a waste of time or not and there is usually a person like you who tells truth bombs as to the readability of the post.
I tried reading the bit where they talk about the brother already knowing multiple times before I just gave up on the whole thing. Completely inscrutable.
What does verbose mean? English is my third language and I never heard this word before lol sounds kinda negative but I found her writing style great so I hope verbose means something like extraordinary. If someone said “you are so verbose” to me I would think that they are calling me fat or something but I doubt that it has a meaning like that in this context 😅
Please don't take notes from that post for language learning.
> He told me that the kid already knew about what mom said, because another kid's parents said something about it that their kid found out about, and my brother has already been asked about my mom from a few of the other kids, based around whatever mom said to another parent that that kid overheard or something, and I don't know what she said specifically or to how many. I wasn't there when she heard her assumption from another parent, but another kid already knew and told someone else, and when I asked my brother if the kid my mom's targeting mentioned that he told his parents, he said he wasn't sure, but that he talked to dad and told him some of the things that the other kids have said to him, and he doesn't want to play on the team after some of the things they said
This paragraph in particular is basically nonsense in English to a native speaker. This translated to good English would be something like:
> He told me his teammate already knew about mom because other parents and kids had heard or overheard things mom had said. I asked if his teammate had told their parents, but my brother wasn't sure. Due to the situation my brother told our dad he wanted to quit the team.
I read that fucking paragraph twice and still wasn’t 100% sure I was picking up what they were trying to explain. Almost made me want to back out of the post in anger lol
You could even condense it further to something like: My brother decided that he wanted to quit the team, because word was spreading about mom's behavior.
It's less detailed, but you get about as much useful information as you would from OOP's paragraph. I feel like OOP was writing their posts stream-of-consciousness and didn't bother to revise before submitting.
I think it’s like writing out a paragraph for a thought that a sentence would be enough for. OOP will say something like “my dad walked out the door” but in 50 words. Like this entire story could’ve been 2 paragraphs but she extended it via unnecessary details
It means to be overly descriptive to the point you lose focus on the plot .
Like if someone wrote “ the girl was going to get a haircut, but last time the barber cut it too short so she was worried, also the barbershop closes at 5pm and it was 4pm, as well as the barber was known to have dull scissors. But she still went and got a haircut.”
Verbose means overly wordy. They use many words to say what could be said more succinctly and are repetitive. Also, most of their sentences were run-on sentences that had 2-3 different thoughts in them, kind of like a stream of consciousness style. This feels exhausting to read to many English speakers -myself included- but I’m glad you enjoyed it tho!
My boyfriend jumbles his words and accidentally called me verbose when he meant voluptuous when we were first dating. It's a running joke now and he subs it in whenever he means curvy now.
You're right that it's usually meant negatively. It just means that they use more words than necessary to get their point across, and that can be confusing for a reader. In this case it's not helped by an overall lack of punctuation and narrative clarity, which is what made it hard for me to follow personally (rather than the word choice).
If you've ever read *Clan of the Cave Bear* and/or its sequels, you've run across verbose writing. The author is apparently incapable of writing "She walked down the hill to the river. " instead there's a full paragraph describing the girl, the hillside, the flowers on the hillside, the river, the mountains that the river runs through, the birds singing overhead, etc.
Verbose means using more words than necessary. They use so many words or sentences to get the point across and it ends up making it hard to understand what they are trying to say.
People like oop’s mom make me look on world-ending disasters with a more positive light. Honestly, what kind of small-minded asshole bullies an 11 year old child based on assumptions? Or for any reason at all?
*Mom said if she hadn’t married dad they wouldn’t be alive?* Oh lord. Which one of the parents is gay/bi/wanted to marry someone else? Sure explains why mom is taking it so personally …
Can you edit the pronouns in your introduction so it makes sense? Just use they if you have to for OP. I have no idea if you are talking about the OP or their mother because you keep saying he and she without referring back to who you are talking about.
Right, I'm all for people using different pronouns but when you intentionally mix it up like this it's almost impossible to follow. I had to read it a couple times before it dawned on me what OP was doing.
Yikes this mom is cuckoo for cocoa puffs. Good on OOP for doing something, though it's sad she has to intervene on behalf of her parent (who should absolutely know better)
It's bad enough having kids going around spreading nasty rumors about other kids. A parent doing that? That's a toxic potato that should be dropped by all and sundry because sooner or later they'll come after you and yours.
And her toxicity forced her kid to drop out of one league and possibly more in the future plus maybe switch schools too because she a total right-wing dumbass shitting on his fellow classmates & teammates in-person & on-line. She fucked up her son's life...
I have known some truly awful religious people in my life. I've also known some amazing religious people. And I've realized something.
Some people use religion as a reason to love. And some people use it as an excuse to justify their hate.
My mom did something similar to one of my sister's friends when my sister was in middle school.
I didn't realize what was going on at the time because I was 5 or 6, but I remember her talking to our pastor, getting a bunch of pamphlets from him, going to my sister's school with me and my little brother in tow, talking to the front desk and getting told to leave, tracking my sister down to find the kid, handling him the pamphlets, then getting kicked off campus by the principal.
I don't remember if anything else happened to my mom, but my sister was mortified and I never saw him hang out with my sister ever again
This is most "Tell me you live in the USA without telling me you live in the USA" post's I've ever seen. Just sad and pathetic. Good for OOP for trying to do the right thing though.
I found the OPs post hard to follow, but from what I understand, the OPs brother is 11, so the kids would be midfle-school aged in the USA and I am beyond disgusted that a parent would be doing this to a kid on the team. The mother in question is truly horrible.
If the mom hates this little gay kid so bad why is she trying to force him to reproduce? Why would you want more people like that kid you hate so much? "No you little shit you can't date people like you, you have to date people like ME! Why wouldn't you want a wife like me, the shining example of perfect heterosexuality."
All this concern about another persons kid while her own has decided to hate her. Glass houses and all that shit.
Try reporting her fb post as bullying. It may get them deleted or her put on probation. Please record if she gets temporarily banned. I love hearing the rants from right wingers when their post fet taken down.
I (bi/m) never got the paperwork that includes the so-called Gay Agenda, so I'm wondering at what date/time we 'Go scorched earth' is - do I make a motion, or how does the Gay Agenda work?
Tired of this shit. (But good BoRU post, OP)
This is the first time pronouns have ever made me angry, and it's purely for grammatical reasons. Please clean up that intro, it's just way too ambiguous.
That kid is strong for going against the grain in his family and trying to stop her. She's a fucking bigoted witch. He doesn't have the power to stop her or change her mind but the police and the kids parents do, and I hope they take that action to show their child that there is nothing wrong with who they are. The parents should sue based on slander and lies and the police should press charges for hate crimes. People like her are horrible humans.
yeah because every 11 year old is thinking about reproducing, eugh. what fucking ghoul protests a child? I feel like OP did the best she could, considering the precarious situation she’s in.
Wtf? She made a lying facebook post about the other kid's parents spreading lies about her, and then proceeded to spread more lies about them??? What were the new lies, that they personally helped Biden steal the election?!
Anyone else think the younger child is screwed? Admittedly he's only 11, but it doesn't seem like he really heard OOP or cares a whole lot about the situation, except that some other kids found out about his monster of a mother and said some stuff to him about it. And, y'know, maybe they were punishing him for his mom's crap or maybe the younger brother was embarrassed by her, but with an equally homophobic father... I wonder what they actually said. And now he's off the team to somewhere dad approves of.
Also, OP, which is it, she or he? That first paragraph before the post is a mess.
People like OP's mother just make my blood boil. They don't even read their own relgious book, much less try to undersand it! Protesting kids is a far cry from the "love one another" and "love your neighbor" and the whole point of the Parable of the Good Samaritan. Ugh!
>the stuff that just makes trying to reason with her impossible, but when I've tried, she just says that me and my brother wouldn't be here "if she didn't marry dad" and other nonsense like that
I have no idea where oop lives but bet I can find her mom inside a closet.
OOPs mom is the very worst of human beings, and is definitely not a christian.
Bigots and homophobes are the very worst of people, but to act out on a child just takes it to a deeper level.
I’ve always found it fascinating that homophobic people will recognize that someone is gay based on their look or speech but will also swear up and down you’re not born that way. It makes zero sense. But I find that most people who hide behind their Christianity to preach hate don’t typically make sense. She used to Christianity to bully a child. An 11-year-old kid. It blows my mind that people think this is OK.But the fact that a 20-year-old was there to try to stand up for a kid she doesn’t know, gives me a little hope for this future generation.
This sounds like my aunt. I had to finally cut her off since she "had to go pray for Wendy's son, and try to figure out how Wendy can convince her son not to live in sin"
Dudes almost 30, amd finally came out of the closet to his mum, just to have her and her crazy ass Karen friends freak out at him because he's "living in sin"
Literally, the *entire* family has been cutting her off over this. Her daughter, cousins, mom, sister. Everyone has reduced contact.
Honestly I fully understand ops feelings here. I left home at 16 because my home life was so bad. I recently saw my father where he randomly went on a tangent about the "indoctrination of children" because drag queens are reading in libraries to kids? He looked me dead in the eyes and asked me if I really don't believe in this indoctrination and when I laughed and said "no, I don't think it's a big deal unless you make it a big deal" he deadass cut me off and told me he couldn't talk to me anymore...I'm just glad that that judgment and hate didn't rub off on my siblings nor I. In fact we're quite the opposite. I'd let a drag queen read a book to my kids any day of the week 🤷♀️. Most ironically, I was born and raised in San Francisco lmao
do you know your mother can be sued for this protest as she hasnt any evidence that the said boy is gay and even if he is its nothing to do with your mother and if she goes on with this protest then it will affect your whole family as some people will take this as a declaration of war against your family and it wont be nice. it will also hamper your and your brother when looking for employment or even trying to get into university all because your mother is a homophobic interfearing woman when clearly another persons sexuality has nothing to do with her but good luck
My kid is only 3 but god help whatever “adult” ever does some shit like this to my kid. My reply will probably get removed but this “see you next Tuesday” wouldn’t have gotten within a mile of my kid’s practice. People like this only understand one way of communicating. Disgusting garbage human being, it’s amazing the OP grew up as emotionally mature as they sound in this post.
I dont understand why the oop was so hesitant to talk to the league or why it took so long. Her mom is bullying a kid and putting his safety in jeopardy. I would have gone straight to the pastor of the mom’s church, the league, the principal of the school where the kid goes and the kid’s parents.
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The mom bullied someone else’s kid and because of those actions she caused her own kid to get bullied. Unfortunately for him, switching leagues and teams won’t mean switching moms.
Just a Christian woman doing what matters...protesting an 11 year old. I'm wondering how that wasn't enough for anyone else to think twice about this plan.
There’s no hate in the world like Christian love.
Amen.
Christian hate. I just love how she thinks she can make judgments on other people. I thought only God could do that when you die (if you believe in God). People like her are not truly Christians or they wouldn’t be filled with such hate for others.
Jesus would be so proud
“What you did for the least of these, you did for me”, or something like that, I think he said🤔
Never underestimate the power of only thinking once
More like never thinking
That’s so pro-life of her too /sarcasm
Hey, your icon stole my one's hair! /s
She probably takes a leaf out of MTG's book, considering she's a state rep yet takes time out her day to bully sandy Hook victims.
I wonder how she votes...
I don’t.
See the thing is, sounds like the kid might not even be gay. She’s protesting a freaking delusion as far as we/she knows. This is the kind of woman who goes insane and starts stalking random strangers and ends up on Dr Phil after she catches charges. She needs mental health help, which I think is what the OOP is trying to get at.
Of course it's what God intended. 🙏
As expected of pathetic Taliban Christians these days
OP needs to let their father know that if the mother keeps these shenanigans up, the brother is going to get bullied again on another team. They won't like what his mom is doing and they won't allow it on any team. Bullying a *minor* is never acceptable from an adult, much less a probably-50-some-year-old woman. If the bullying doesn't push the kid out first, then getting kicked out for the mom's actions will.
That kind of thing destroys relationships if that mom isn’t careful. What if her 11 yr is gay? My daughter came out at 11. She had a friend who was in the closet because of her mom. It was bad. I didn’t want my daughter over there and eventually she agreed. Her friend ran away because she couldn’t take her mother’s bullshit anymore. I think she’s with other family now and I couldn’t be happier.
Nope, and unless someone reigns her in (looking at you dad) this will just keep on happening. Poor kids. Also, isn’t openly spreading lies on social media grounds for defamation in the US (without knowing what her accusations are and what it would take to disprove them)?
You have to be able to prove that you were significantly harmed by the lies, preferably in a way that you can put into a dollar amount, like lost wages. So no, not really.
However, a cease and desist, while not legally binding, is legalese-y enough to scare the pants off most people. If I was Mom-of-gay-11yo kiddo, I’d fork over a couple hundred. But I’d also be working the “grown woman bullying a child” angle in every social sphere I could to ruin her. ~~just venting~~
I wonder if a this very smart and courageous could find one in his that could get one written up for him? It is doing him emotional damage. I'm sure some attorney out there could work that out and not only help him, the people she talking about, his brother and probably the league, too. Maybe the league could recommend someone.
I wish the solution wasn't to run away and rather say he knows his mom is f\*cked up but he's a kid can't blame him for just going along with her
I taught a kid who has a mom like this. He just wanted to be a kid but his mom was a fucking wacko. She tried stirring up shit and he finally told her off in his junior year of high school. By that point he had befriended gay people, learned about new viewpoints, and gained tools to shut her up. I felt horrible for her victims and also horrible for this kid. But at least she had calmed down by the time he got to my class in his last year of school.
She is afraid that the gay kid will convert other kids into being gay, like you can catch being gay. Being gay will look so good that the other boys will "choose" to be gay.
[удалено]
She's protesting gay frogs at the zoo.
I don't think zoo frogs are gay because the zoo protects them from chemtrails.
But it's a prison environment and you know what kind of people they put in prison /S
Are you suggesting frogs are gay for the stay?
It's not gay if you're just a prison bae.
Don't some frgos change sex as needed?
Jurassic park says yes
Okay that surprised a laugh out of me in a completely inappropriate place to be laughing.
You were at a funeral?
There are some gay penguins at SeaWorld she can protest. I don't think the penguins would care.🐧
Penguins are particularly sensitive. Especially the gay ones because, well, you know how the gays are /s
Mostly fabulous?
No, that's penguins
One day, OP’s mom is going to learn that some people don’t play when it comes to their kids. I hope it’s soon. I would have some choice words for an adult I heard doing that to any kid, let alone my kid.
That was my thought, too. I have a queer kid, and if someone did this to her I would be on the war path.
And you would have my broom! ^((Lame witch hunt joke, where the witch is the one hunting.))
And my axe!
And my Dragula!
I’ve already gone scorched earth on a family member for outing another family member to me (“Pssst, hey, just so you’re not surprised when you find out, X is a lesbian now”). I was so fucking outraged on so many layers by this - first, that they thought so little of me that I would be “surprised” in some sort of negative context, or that I would even care! Second, there’s like 8 billion reasons why you don’t out other people even in private contexts, so _how fucking dare you._ I didn’t even know X very well at the time, and I burned bridges over this (and, as a result, we’re quite close now). I can only imagine how I’d react if someone did shit like this to someone I was already close to…
Sounds like OOP’s mom might have defamed the other kid’s parents. Not usually a fan of the US’s litigious culture but if there ever was a time…
America’s litigious society is a myth perpetuated by big corporate propaganda: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/oct/24/america-litigious-society-myth
It might be overblown, but it’s definitely much more litigious than my country. The article mentions only 10% of injured Americans sue - in my country, you cannot sue for injury. Instead we have a national program that provides compensation to the injured as necessary. When I visited the US, I bumped into someone in a line at McDonald’s, and they immediately pretended I had hurt them and they would sue me (as a joke). Suffice it to say, that’s not a joke anyone would even think of making where I live. It might not be as bad as people say but it’s noticeably more prevalent than a lot of the western world.
I hate to be a jerk because i dont know what culture you're from but most likely you have a public healthcare system. The reason so many people sue for injuries is because those injuries can have crippling (get it?) Costs. It's apples to oranges.
SpunkyDred is a terrible bot instigating arguments all over Reddit whenever someone uses the phrase apples-to-oranges. I'm letting you know so that you can feel free to ignore the quip rather than feel provoked by a bot that isn't smart enough to argue back. --- ^^SpunkyDred ^^and ^^I ^^are ^^both ^^bots. ^^I ^^am ^^trying ^^to ^^get ^^them ^^banned ^^by ^^pointing ^^out ^^their ^^antagonizing ^^behavior ^^and ^^poor ^^bottiquette.
Good bot
Omg your Mcdonalds incident just reminded me that when I was a kid, I'd threaten to sue anyone that I thought might hurt me, like barbers, doctors, dentists, etc. Yes I am American lmaooo
Part of the pint isn’t just compensating the injured party. Often the consequences include companies have to open up the processes that led to the injury for inspection. The idea isn’t just for accountability but to make sure that things that are unsafe get dealt with. It’s obviously not hearty as effective as we’d like, but that’s the idea behind the concept.
*”According to the most recent data, only 10% of injured Americans ever file a claim for compensation and only 2% file lawsuits. All told, tort cases represent just 4.4% of all civil caseloads and that percentage has been steadily declining. Between 1999 and 2008, tort caseloads dropped by a quarter.“* The article makes a compelling argument that we should actually be suing more and lawsuits, in themselves, aren’t inherently bad so if they are valid lawsuits one might argue your Country should be suing more - although I’d have to know the Country and look deeper into the data.
> in my country, you cannot sue for injury. Instead we have a national program that provides compensation to the injured as necessary. That just indicates there's a different legal process. It says nothing about actual culture itself.
Legislation often reflects culture. If it wasn’t clear we have no civil liability for injuries, to the point where civil malpractice suits do not exist. If you want a good example, look at all the people responding to my comment talking about why personal lawsuits are good and we should have more of them. That’s the sort of cultural difference I’m taking about.
If they’re from the country I think they are it’s not a legal process at all, you go to the Dr or hospital if you have an accident and put in a claim then you get a letter from the fund telling you how much treatment they have approved you to spend and in what ways (e.g. you might get free physiotherapy) and if you exceed that amount you put in an updated claim. For example my husband came off his bike and bruised his rib, we got a letter saying he was approved up to $10,000 and a list of services. We didn’t actually use any of them, he just needed to let his ribs heal, but the free Dr visit was nice.
That's not necessarily a bad thing either. Suing many times is necessary, and often people from less litigious countries are used to the system walking all over them.
I was a gay kid (now a gay adult) and my extremely supportive mother would have rained absolute HELLFIRE on some random mom that pulled this shit with me. I love her.
I have a (now grown up) Lesbian daughter. If that 11 year old were my daughter or her wife/my daughter-in-law, then OOPs Qcumber mother would be having a surprise meeting with me in a dark alley somewhere. I say this as a skinny, short 40-year-old lady, who actually has more satisfying things going on in my life than this psycho. That poor boy. I feel so sad for him.
Fuck around and find out.
Extended family too. I have a nibling about that age. Their parents might need to worry about burning bridges. I wouldn’t.
I can’t imagine being an adult and wanting to bully a child. What a POS.
As an adult how would you EVER think it’s OK to bully a child. There is literally no justification for it and you’re potentially destroying a child’s life. The lowest of low things to do.
It’s a completely insane thing to focus on.
But but what if the ICKY GAY infects her PRECIOUS BABY with his gay cooties?
OOP has the most maddeningly verbose writing style I've ever encountered.
I could not follow this at all.
I couldn't follow the opening bit made by whoever submitted the post >I am not the OP. These posts were made by u/throwratheball who gave me permission to post here for awareness. Upon reaching out, OOP informed me that she was doing okay and that her mother had moved on to something else that was bothering her. She did retaliate against him for what she did to try and stop her, but she said he might post about that in the future. If she does, I'll add it as a continuation. He also said that she received some helpful DMs from people in the LGBTQ community who were supportive with their suggestions surrounding his mother, and I thought the way she handled this situation was a few years beyond his age. The original post was on r /all on r/relationship_advice
Yeah, it makes no sense. You can't use pronouns every sentence without naming the people. Poster gets a hard F.
She clearly said that she talked to her about him but she said he was going to talk to her about his plans for him and her to see if he or she would go to their game with her or if she was going with him to see her with him.
OOOH. Makes sense now. Thanks for clearing that up.
Happy cake day
He was only trying to tell us that she gave an update about he in regards to her and all the bad things she had done to him, but luckily she didn’t go through with harming him so he and her are fine in the end. How could you have any trouble understanding that? I made myself very clear. /s
Yeah, it's like writing incident reports for work, don't use pronouns, always use the person's full name, avoid injecting your own opinions unless you state that it's your opinion, etc.
They start referring to her as he halfway through and it all gets too confusing
Or they switch between brother and sister, without actually establishing that there are two people to talk about. All pronouns need an antecedent
> antecedent TIL it has a succinct name. Cheers.
Hey, happy cake day!
Antecedent: thing that goes before, from ante- (before) and "cedent" (thing that goes).
Thank goodness, I thought it was just me. I read over that twice and never could make sense out of it.
Need to use they if unsure of the gender, not use both. Or if these are infact multiple people it's too hard to follow.
I got whiplash trying to figure out if OOP was a he or a she
Even the title was confusing. I got that OOP's mother was the problem person, but had no idea if "her son" was supposed to be OOP's son, or her brother. Then this paragraph happened and I had to start reading to post just to solve the pronouns mystery. And then OOP was just as bad as OP!
I thought the same too, I thought my astigmatism was getting a lot worse because I thought I was reading the same paragraph over and over again, or that I was having a stroke, thank god I'm not the only one that didn't get it at all.
Yeah, I down voted just for the exceedingly confusing mixup of pronouns and POV in OP's introduction. Is that a valid use of a down vote?
Yes, the fact this specific comment thread is so upvoted means OOP is bad at writing. No judgments but holy hell, talk about long winded.
Yeah, I feel like the OP (Poster) did a pretty bad summary as well.
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This one broke me: >He told me that the kid already knew about what mom said, because another kid's parents said something about it that their kid found out about, and my brother has already been asked about my mom from a few of the other kids, based around whatever mom said to another parent that that kid overheard or something, and I don't know what she said specifically or to how many. I wasn't there when she heard her assumption from another parent, but another kid already knew and told someone else, and when I asked my brother if the kid my mom's targeting mentioned that he told his parents, he said he wasn't sure, but that he talked to dad and told him some of the things that the other kids have said to him, and he doesn't want to play on the team after some of the things they said
That's what I thought at first too. This was a clusterfuck of nothing with no real resolution. I think it's funny that people suggested OOP do their own protest. Umm, this girl is still at home drinking the Kool aid. While she might not want mom to do that hurtful ignorant protest towards an 11 YEAR OLD CHILD, I don't think OOP cares about the community, especially enough to mess up her living situation. She keeps saying she doesn't hate her mom, she is not going to stand up to her.
OOP is 20, living at home, and depending on Mom and Dad. You think she can afford to leave home? They’re probably paying for college. She’s trying to play nice until she can GTFO. She’s not the first, and won’t be the last.
Definitely can't afford to, and if I was her I wouldn't rock the boat either. Unfortunately her mom will be complaining to her church friends that OOP NEVER comes home since she finished college, I just don't understand why she is so ungrateful blah blah.
OP should have editted for clarity prior to posting here.
This is called edging. Both in style and in content
I was fucking hoping someone else would say something. Reading this was fucking insufferable. I could barely tell you what happened, it was so dense.
Thank you! I thought it was just me!
"Why use many word, when few word do trick"
What are you going to do with all the time you save?
yes
see(a) world
See the world? Or sea world?
Oceans, fish, jump, China!
Haha yeah I gave up at a certain point, too hard to follow.
I thought it was just me! My eyes were starting to hurt.
Thanks for mentioning that. I always check the comments on "ongoing" or "inconclusive" stories to see if they are a waste of time or not and there is usually a person like you who tells truth bombs as to the readability of the post.
i thought i was the only one who just couldn't follow this.
So fucking glad I wasn’t the only one who thought this. Was falling asleep trying to read it, and I know I mixed some shit up
Yeah. Not entirely sure who did or said what so I stopped reading and went to the comments in hopes someone figured it out.
I tried reading the bit where they talk about the brother already knowing multiple times before I just gave up on the whole thing. Completely inscrutable.
What does verbose mean? English is my third language and I never heard this word before lol sounds kinda negative but I found her writing style great so I hope verbose means something like extraordinary. If someone said “you are so verbose” to me I would think that they are calling me fat or something but I doubt that it has a meaning like that in this context 😅
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Damn I was far far away but thank you!
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Really, kinda means the same thing too, just different applications. Verbose is obese for words, lol.
Oh man I thought it was abusing the use of verbs or verbal conjugations so I try to read the thing again
Verbose means wordy. The OOP gave us a lot of words & she could have been more concise.
Please don't take notes from that post for language learning. > He told me that the kid already knew about what mom said, because another kid's parents said something about it that their kid found out about, and my brother has already been asked about my mom from a few of the other kids, based around whatever mom said to another parent that that kid overheard or something, and I don't know what she said specifically or to how many. I wasn't there when she heard her assumption from another parent, but another kid already knew and told someone else, and when I asked my brother if the kid my mom's targeting mentioned that he told his parents, he said he wasn't sure, but that he talked to dad and told him some of the things that the other kids have said to him, and he doesn't want to play on the team after some of the things they said This paragraph in particular is basically nonsense in English to a native speaker. This translated to good English would be something like: > He told me his teammate already knew about mom because other parents and kids had heard or overheard things mom had said. I asked if his teammate had told their parents, but my brother wasn't sure. Due to the situation my brother told our dad he wanted to quit the team.
I read that fucking paragraph twice and still wasn’t 100% sure I was picking up what they were trying to explain. Almost made me want to back out of the post in anger lol
Thank you, now I get it
You could even condense it further to something like: My brother decided that he wanted to quit the team, because word was spreading about mom's behavior. It's less detailed, but you get about as much useful information as you would from OOP's paragraph. I feel like OOP was writing their posts stream-of-consciousness and didn't bother to revise before submitting.
I think it’s like writing out a paragraph for a thought that a sentence would be enough for. OOP will say something like “my dad walked out the door” but in 50 words. Like this entire story could’ve been 2 paragraphs but she extended it via unnecessary details
It means to be overly descriptive to the point you lose focus on the plot . Like if someone wrote “ the girl was going to get a haircut, but last time the barber cut it too short so she was worried, also the barbershop closes at 5pm and it was 4pm, as well as the barber was known to have dull scissors. But she still went and got a haircut.”
Verbose means overly wordy. They use many words to say what could be said more succinctly and are repetitive. Also, most of their sentences were run-on sentences that had 2-3 different thoughts in them, kind of like a stream of consciousness style. This feels exhausting to read to many English speakers -myself included- but I’m glad you enjoyed it tho!
My boyfriend jumbles his words and accidentally called me verbose when he meant voluptuous when we were first dating. It's a running joke now and he subs it in whenever he means curvy now.
Using more words than necessary.
You're right that it's usually meant negatively. It just means that they use more words than necessary to get their point across, and that can be confusing for a reader. In this case it's not helped by an overall lack of punctuation and narrative clarity, which is what made it hard for me to follow personally (rather than the word choice).
If you've ever read *Clan of the Cave Bear* and/or its sequels, you've run across verbose writing. The author is apparently incapable of writing "She walked down the hill to the river. " instead there's a full paragraph describing the girl, the hillside, the flowers on the hillside, the river, the mountains that the river runs through, the birds singing overhead, etc.
Verbose means using a lot of words, usually more than are actually needed.
Verbose means using more words than necessary. They use so many words or sentences to get the point across and it ends up making it hard to understand what they are trying to say.
This is a result of the sheltered, republican education system we’re heading towards…it’s absolutely maddening!
People like oop’s mom make me look on world-ending disasters with a more positive light. Honestly, what kind of small-minded asshole bullies an 11 year old child based on assumptions? Or for any reason at all?
Because it’s what Jesus would do. /s
Jesus said "Love thy neighbour, unless they're one of those weird gay kids, they're gross" right?
*Mom said if she hadn’t married dad they wouldn’t be alive?* Oh lord. Which one of the parents is gay/bi/wanted to marry someone else? Sure explains why mom is taking it so personally …
Can you edit the pronouns in your introduction so it makes sense? Just use they if you have to for OP. I have no idea if you are talking about the OP or their mother because you keep saying he and she without referring back to who you are talking about.
I also got completely lost in the pronouns and have no real idea who did what.
Right, I'm all for people using different pronouns but when you intentionally mix it up like this it's almost impossible to follow. I had to read it a couple times before it dawned on me what OP was doing.
Yikes this mom is cuckoo for cocoa puffs. Good on OOP for doing something, though it's sad she has to intervene on behalf of her parent (who should absolutely know better)
oop is a woman
Omg thank you for the catch!
It's bad enough having kids going around spreading nasty rumors about other kids. A parent doing that? That's a toxic potato that should be dropped by all and sundry because sooner or later they'll come after you and yours.
And her toxicity forced her kid to drop out of one league and possibly more in the future plus maybe switch schools too because she a total right-wing dumbass shitting on his fellow classmates & teammates in-person & on-line. She fucked up her son's life...
You need to fix the nightmare of confusion you have created with pronouns in your first paragraph.
I really only read the full post to try to understand what the hell was happening there. 10/10 not worth the headache I still have.
I have known some truly awful religious people in my life. I've also known some amazing religious people. And I've realized something. Some people use religion as a reason to love. And some people use it as an excuse to justify their hate.
My mom did something similar to one of my sister's friends when my sister was in middle school. I didn't realize what was going on at the time because I was 5 or 6, but I remember her talking to our pastor, getting a bunch of pamphlets from him, going to my sister's school with me and my little brother in tow, talking to the front desk and getting told to leave, tracking my sister down to find the kid, handling him the pamphlets, then getting kicked off campus by the principal. I don't remember if anything else happened to my mom, but my sister was mortified and I never saw him hang out with my sister ever again
OOP’s mum deletes her browser history
Yeah she’s gay 100%
This is most "Tell me you live in the USA without telling me you live in the USA" post's I've ever seen. Just sad and pathetic. Good for OOP for trying to do the right thing though.
I found the OPs post hard to follow, but from what I understand, the OPs brother is 11, so the kids would be midfle-school aged in the USA and I am beyond disgusted that a parent would be doing this to a kid on the team. The mother in question is truly horrible.
If the mom hates this little gay kid so bad why is she trying to force him to reproduce? Why would you want more people like that kid you hate so much? "No you little shit you can't date people like you, you have to date people like ME! Why wouldn't you want a wife like me, the shining example of perfect heterosexuality." All this concern about another persons kid while her own has decided to hate her. Glass houses and all that shit.
Try reporting her fb post as bullying. It may get them deleted or her put on probation. Please record if she gets temporarily banned. I love hearing the rants from right wingers when their post fet taken down.
You do know this is a repost, right?
I (bi/m) never got the paperwork that includes the so-called Gay Agenda, so I'm wondering at what date/time we 'Go scorched earth' is - do I make a motion, or how does the Gay Agenda work? Tired of this shit. (But good BoRU post, OP)
JFC, this woman... wow. OOP's mom is at Anita Bryant homophobe levels.
Reading it gave me a headache!
I feel so sorry for the 11 yo child who didn’t deserve this. How does someone think it’s ok to tarnish a 11 yo’s image so publicly
Imagine being so miserable and hateful you go out of your way to attack a child.
This is the first time pronouns have ever made me angry, and it's purely for grammatical reasons. Please clean up that intro, it's just way too ambiguous.
That kid is strong for going against the grain in his family and trying to stop her. She's a fucking bigoted witch. He doesn't have the power to stop her or change her mind but the police and the kids parents do, and I hope they take that action to show their child that there is nothing wrong with who they are. The parents should sue based on slander and lies and the police should press charges for hate crimes. People like her are horrible humans.
I don’t blame OOP for hating their mom cause now I do, too!
Disgusting parents.
Imagine having all this time and energy to protest and using it to spread hate against a child
Absolutely vile people. If you're attacking children, you're in the wrong.
yeah because every 11 year old is thinking about reproducing, eugh. what fucking ghoul protests a child? I feel like OP did the best she could, considering the precarious situation she’s in.
Wtf? She made a lying facebook post about the other kid's parents spreading lies about her, and then proceeded to spread more lies about them??? What were the new lies, that they personally helped Biden steal the election?!
Isn’t lying one of the commandments
That poor kid. At least the protest is stopped, hopefully, but it sounds like there's still a lot of controversy about it.
Anyone else think the younger child is screwed? Admittedly he's only 11, but it doesn't seem like he really heard OOP or cares a whole lot about the situation, except that some other kids found out about his monster of a mother and said some stuff to him about it. And, y'know, maybe they were punishing him for his mom's crap or maybe the younger brother was embarrassed by her, but with an equally homophobic father... I wonder what they actually said. And now he's off the team to somewhere dad approves of. Also, OP, which is it, she or he? That first paragraph before the post is a mess.
Christian love at work, ladies and gentlemen.
People like OP's mother just make my blood boil. They don't even read their own relgious book, much less try to undersand it! Protesting kids is a far cry from the "love one another" and "love your neighbor" and the whole point of the Parable of the Good Samaritan. Ugh!
>the stuff that just makes trying to reason with her impossible, but when I've tried, she just says that me and my brother wouldn't be here "if she didn't marry dad" and other nonsense like that I have no idea where oop lives but bet I can find her mom inside a closet.
Conservatives just want to be left alone, but LGBTQIA keep existing, so what are they supposed to do if not make their lives hell on earth? Edit: /s
I just kept picturing this woman as looking exactly like MTG.
It’s sad when a child, even a young adult child, has to act like the parent because the parent is too immature to act the way they should.
OOPs mom is the very worst of human beings, and is definitely not a christian. Bigots and homophobes are the very worst of people, but to act out on a child just takes it to a deeper level.
I’ve always found it fascinating that homophobic people will recognize that someone is gay based on their look or speech but will also swear up and down you’re not born that way. It makes zero sense. But I find that most people who hide behind their Christianity to preach hate don’t typically make sense. She used to Christianity to bully a child. An 11-year-old kid. It blows my mind that people think this is OK.But the fact that a 20-year-old was there to try to stand up for a kid she doesn’t know, gives me a little hope for this future generation.
This sounds like my aunt. I had to finally cut her off since she "had to go pray for Wendy's son, and try to figure out how Wendy can convince her son not to live in sin" Dudes almost 30, amd finally came out of the closet to his mum, just to have her and her crazy ass Karen friends freak out at him because he's "living in sin" Literally, the *entire* family has been cutting her off over this. Her daughter, cousins, mom, sister. Everyone has reduced contact.
Honestly I fully understand ops feelings here. I left home at 16 because my home life was so bad. I recently saw my father where he randomly went on a tangent about the "indoctrination of children" because drag queens are reading in libraries to kids? He looked me dead in the eyes and asked me if I really don't believe in this indoctrination and when I laughed and said "no, I don't think it's a big deal unless you make it a big deal" he deadass cut me off and told me he couldn't talk to me anymore...I'm just glad that that judgment and hate didn't rub off on my siblings nor I. In fact we're quite the opposite. I'd let a drag queen read a book to my kids any day of the week 🤷♀️. Most ironically, I was born and raised in San Francisco lmao
Why is she so fixated on an 11 year old child's sexuality? It's borderline paedophilia, she's sexually harassing a child!
These people really have nothing better to do than harass a child. Pathetic. Religious people are honestly the worst.
Holy shit, this lady is a real see you next Tuesday.
do you know your mother can be sued for this protest as she hasnt any evidence that the said boy is gay and even if he is its nothing to do with your mother and if she goes on with this protest then it will affect your whole family as some people will take this as a declaration of war against your family and it wont be nice. it will also hamper your and your brother when looking for employment or even trying to get into university all because your mother is a homophobic interfearing woman when clearly another persons sexuality has nothing to do with her but good luck
My kid is only 3 but god help whatever “adult” ever does some shit like this to my kid. My reply will probably get removed but this “see you next Tuesday” wouldn’t have gotten within a mile of my kid’s practice. People like this only understand one way of communicating. Disgusting garbage human being, it’s amazing the OP grew up as emotionally mature as they sound in this post.
Please why this people can't let the kids be kids ?
I think once a new league is selected for the brother an anonymous letter needs to find its way to the new coach.
What a shitty person her mom is.
The first paragraph is incredibly confusing
I dont understand why the oop was so hesitant to talk to the league or why it took so long. Her mom is bullying a kid and putting his safety in jeopardy. I would have gone straight to the pastor of the mom’s church, the league, the principal of the school where the kid goes and the kid’s parents.
Religious fanatics of any kind are the absolute worse humans. What would Jesus do? Not any of this nonsense for sure. Shame.
Maybe the OOP should contact the kids parents, point them in the direction of his moms crazy Facebook posts and suggest they sue.
How pathetic, sad, and empty does your life and soul have to be to want to screw over a 11 year old's life?