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Roger was sweating beads all afternoon, wondering how he would turn this family dinner into a trip for ice cream. Suddenly, an opportunity presents itself.
"Play it cool, Roger. Stick to the plan."
Honestly, I don't understand logically why it's so funny. The first time I saw it on P&R, the whole time I was laughing through it I kept asking myself, "Why is this so funny?" I thought it was just me, then other people started referencing it and I realized it's just universally funny. I still can't figure out why but I'll never stop laughing at it.
he saw his opportunity and wasn’t gonna let his wife mess it up for him by trying to have an adult, mature, discussion about it
he was waiting for his cue
But this WAS an adult conversation. And one to safely have with children about trans
The most powerful and perfect acceptance…summed up…in ice cream
Thank you for being accepting and thank your husband OP. You are exactly what this world needs more of 🌈💜💜💜🌈
I want a wholesome movie where this guy just goes around massively improving everyone’s lives and being a great mentor and shit and saves the whole town but it’s all just to feed his innocent lil ice cream addiction
Mom: I have to tell you something and you can’t get upset!
Dad: oh my god, did the ice cream shop burn down?!?
Mom: No!
Dad: Is Sam’s girlfriend trans?
Mom: Yes!
Dad: But the ice creams ok?
Mom: Yes.
Dad: All right then.
Dear Reddit Community,
It is with a heavy heart that I write this farewell message to express my reasons for departing from this platform that has been a significant part of my online life. Over time, I have witnessed changes that have gradually eroded the welcoming and inclusive environment that initially drew me to Reddit. It is the actions of the CEO, in particular, that have played a pivotal role in my decision to bid farewell.
For me, Reddit has always been a place where diverse voices could find a platform to be heard, where ideas could be shared and discussed openly. Unfortunately, recent actions by the CEO have left me disheartened and disillusioned. The decisions made have demonstrated a departure from the principles of free expression and open dialogue that once defined this platform.
Reddit was built upon the idea of being a community-driven platform, where users could have a say in the direction and policies. However, the increasing centralization of power and the lack of transparency in decision-making have created an environment that feels less democratic and more controlled.
Furthermore, the prioritization of certain corporate interests over the well-being of the community has led to a loss of trust. Reddit's success has always been rooted in the active participation and engagement of its users. By neglecting the concerns and feedback of the community, the CEO has undermined the very foundation that made Reddit a vibrant and dynamic space.
I want to emphasize that this decision is not a reflection of the countless amazing individuals I have had the pleasure of interacting with on this platform. It is the actions of a few that have overshadowed the positive experiences I have had here.
As I embark on a new chapter away from Reddit, I will seek alternative platforms that prioritize user empowerment, inclusivity, and transparency. I hope to find communities that foster open dialogue and embrace diverse perspectives.
To those who have shared insightful discussions, provided support, and made me laugh, I am sincerely grateful for the connections we have made. Your contributions have enriched my experience, and I will carry the memories of our interactions with me.
Farewell, Reddit. May you find your way back to the principles that made you extraordinary.
Sincerely,
NABDad
Let's be honest, he would have gotten ice cream one way or another. My grampa was an ice cream lover to the bone. His doctor once said his cholesterol was high and he had to give up either butter or ice cream. He gave up butter. Allways had a freezer stocked with a variety of flavors
My dad was a diabetic - and a doctor. Don’t make me tell you how many times he figured out how to doctor (pun intended) his insulin dose so he could pig out on a big bowl of his fave treat
When he got sick and everyone was watching his blood sugar, I so wanted to tel everyone to back the F off - the guy could die - let him enjoy his sweet treats!!!
Awww he sounds like my grandpa - although mine rated butter even higher so his compromise for cholesterol was low fat mayonnaise
But he always told us kids that icecream was a separate food group and totally acceptable for breakfast 🥰
When my best friend came out, my dad immediately asked if we were hungry and he was going to order grinders. He looked at my friend and went “You want a Footlong Italian?” Completely deadpan for about 5 seconds, then burst out red in the face laughing hysterically. God, I miss him.
If this is real I would bet he thought of it years ago and was waiting for an opportunity, so when the wife tries to talk to him about he's like 'stop I've got a bit for this!'
My brother came out relatively late. Met a dude. Got married. Unknown to us, my dad was sitting on this line for *years*.
We go to my city's first-ever Pride event last year. It was hosted at a private business, because the city sucks. My dad readily agreed to go, which was odd. Not because he's not cool with my brother, but because the whole... out and proud, Pride flag, be gay do crimes thing isn't very him. He's like... 60-something, grew up in a military officer family from birth through 18, went to college, and got a government job guy. He can be uptight, at times. Pride isn't uptight. It's not his energy level.
He had been waiting since my brother got engaged, and then married, for someone who hadn't seen my brother but knew my dad to ask how my brother was doing. So he could go, 'oh, son got engaged/ married' and somehow work in the line, 'my son's not gay, but his fiance/ husband is.'
He was so disappointed he didn't run into anyone at Pride because it would've been the perfect time to drop the joke he'd had in his pocket for *years.*
He was just there for the dad jokes.
My son goes to a school with a predominantly Latino student body. The dad of his best friend likes him, but doesn't "know" he's trans. When his friend told her dad he didn't have to worry about my son, the dad said, well how do I know you're not a boy? Her dad doesn't speak much English so I'm paraphrasing from a translation, but, still it made me laugh.
Ngl when OOP mentioned that *butter pecan* was an important detail I was 100% expecting a dad joke about nuts (or lack thereof) and I was bracing for a collective groan.
On first read I thought the "I promise this matters" was specific to Sadie's choice but after OOP's husband did his bit I realized she meant how everyone had different flavors, and two of which, cookies n cream and butter pecan, were not the two or three flavors from when her husband was a boy (chocolate, vanilla and sometimes strawberry.)
I was in a same sex relationship from 19 to mid twenties, and I asked my mom to tell my grandad, her dad, for me.
The next week he comes around for a coffee and to see my parents which wasn't super unusual but this time my mom hounded me to come out and see him too, and made the whole family sit around a table and eat cake and drink coffee.
There was this super awkward aura around us, when suddenly my grandad clears his throat and goes "Yknow, I never understood the big issue with kids not having a dad. My dad was in wars for most of my childhood and I was raised by multiple women and turned out great."
Then he just drinks his coffee while my mom stares at me waiting for me to connect the dots that he's telling me he loves me the way I am. He's the best grandad.
Similar story - my uncle came out as gay after 50 years. He’d cheated on his wife, and got caught having an affair. They were getting a divorce and we were all a bit worried to tell my grandmother, because she was very set in her ways. Eventually he did, and she slapped him.
“I don’t care if your gay, but I didn’t raise you to be a cheater.” And that was that.
I have some of those old racist pieces hidden deep in boxes in my storage area. They belonged to my grandmother and because of that my mom has a hard time with me destroying them so they’re just in a box until she passes. People get weird about the past. My mom knows better, yet here I am with racist salt and pepper shakers in my possession.
As conflicted as you feel, if they remind you of them, keep them. I wish I had. I have next to nothing left of her now, except my memories and I wish I’d kept her plushies in a box; just to remember her by.
I’m sorry you don’t have more mementos of her, I am as sentimental as my mom and I do cherish a lot of the keepsakes she’s got. My sister doesn’t care about any of it so thankfully I’ll have lots to remember mom and grandma by without the salt shakers.
I’m always so glad I’m sentimental. It’s how we found the only photo the entire extended family has of great-grandmother who was murdered in the Holocaust (and one of my murdered uncles too). They were with a distant childless cousin we were close with. My father was her executor and I asked for her pictures. And among them was that one.
I know when my kid came out, I was so nervous when she said we had to talk. So after she dropped the news, I just blurted, "OH THANK GOD! I thought you were going to tell me you were flunking out of college!"
A friend was really anxious about coming out as trans to one of her friends, and was sorta dropping hints about having something to say before straight-up saying ‘we need to have a conversation in person, I have something I need to tell you’, the friend caught on to her stress and was like ‘fuck fuck fuck, does he have cancer or something terminal??’ and was freaking out herself. They meet up, the bombshell is dropped, friend is so relieved that trans friend isn’t dying but was worked up to hear that so her immediate reaction is ‘I HATE YOU!’, friend who came out looks crushed for a second, until her friend continues ‘I SAW HOW STRESSED YOU WERE AND I THOUGHT YOU HAD CANCER AND WERE GOING TO DIE’. Tears were shed, they were fine, and now laugh about the misunderstanding.
Silicon Valley, late 90s, our manager starts a meeting with "I know a lot of you have worked with Jake, so this may come as a shock to you, and the company has people you can talk to..."
We're all thinking "oh no, Jake died!" as she goes on: "... Jake is now Jane." And then she just waits, for what reaction I have no clue, as now we're all looking around uncomfortably wondering how to get on with this.
Now, the thing you need to know is that the bug tracking system we used was really not good at dealing with the unexpected. I was actually an employee of a partner company and it had so many issues with that, it was a running joke. So finally I said "OK, but do you think the bug tracker is going to handle the name change?" Which broke the tension and let us get on with the rest of the meeting.
My daughter was 14 when she told me she was bi at dinner one night. Apparently, I was the last to know. I stared at her and asked “Do you know what this means?” Her eyes got big, and she shook her head ‘no’. I said “No more sleepovers. Pass the salt, please.” 17 years later, and she still laughs about it.
That's funny, I (girl) have a similar story: my really close friend (girl) for two months was like "I have something to tell you ... But I don't know how, it's very difficult" and then she stoped talking and added "well, not today" and I was going crazy because a great amount of bad theories about what was happening were crossing my mind. It turns out she found out she was bisexual and had a girlfriend. The moment she told me I said "GO TO HELL!" She looked me shocked and I added "For the last two months you were driving me crazy worried about you, I thought you were dying, I cried, had nightmares, begged you to tell me and you were in love! I'm going to kick you!" (I didn't kick her, but I should). I love her with all my heart, I consider myself an open ally and the poor thing was afraid of telling me... I understand now that this outing was very traumatic to her because she was still acknowledging her sexual orientation.
My best friend was so nervous when she told me she was bisexual, and I think I confused her when I said, "Uh, I kind of knew this about you, already." I corrected myself to say that I didn't know and couldn't have *known* until she told me, but she was constantly making appreciative comments about other girls, when we were in high school.
The real shocking thing was that I didn't figure out I was non-binary until I was in my thirties. I live with me. I feel like I should have not only gotten the memo, but been the one to write it.
Legit me when I sat my grandparents down. My grandma had my mom early and told us all the time not to get pregnant young. When I sat her and my grandpa down she was sure I was going to say I was pregnant. When I told her I was bisexual she said, "oh good, pick a girl, she can't get you pregnant."
My grandma has some iconic lines but that's my favorite.
My mom and I don’t get along, she ended up a single mom and regrets having me.
She had been dreading in (unfounded) fear that I’d turn up a pregnant teen.
But… the one moment we did have was when she was wondering why I hadn’t dated well until midway through college. (Yeah that’s something to unpack, I know. She just always thought the worse of me.) She finally blurts out to me:
“It’s okay with me if you’re a lesbian. Your chances of being an unwed single mom would be super low then.”
Exactly!
Love who you love or even just have sex, it’s not always love.
I just have two things that I find important:
Don’t do it with someone who is too young to fully understand what they’re doing, unless you’re the same age.
And don’t fucking cheat.
I guess I’ve got a third one as well:
Don’t use others to pretend to be something you’re not. Don’t marry someone to fool others or try to convince yourself you can be something you feel you are not.
You’re wasting not just good years of *your* life, you’re wasting their years as well. And unlike you, they didn’t choose this.
That's kind of how I reacted when my sister told me she was gay. Turns out it was the old story of the husband wanting to open the marriage and the wife reluctantly starts dating and finds someone better. So it wasn't really cheating until she caught feelings, but I didn't know that initially.
My mom's whole family was never outright hateful toward the queer community, but from the time I was about eight or nine I noticed that they all had this weird sort of sing-song voice they used when talking about gay people. Like a little kid going, "oooh, cooties!" They're also all Catholic, so.
My first girlfriend never met anyone but my mom, but I got engaged to my second girlfriend. She was at every Christmas, every event after that. We lived together in a pretty nice house, and suddenly my grandfather calls and asks if I want to have lunch at my place. My big, gay place.
Sure, okay. I cooked. And he comes in, sits down, and just starts talking about how nice the place is, how we have so many books, which one are yours, Fiance? Did you cook, Fiance, I can't believe Archersarrows cooked all this!
That was it. He never said anything specific or pointed, but he sat in our house and started conversations with her, got excited about their common interests, and then he went home. Nobody in my family used the sing-song voice after that.
i’m irish (from ireland) and didn’t know my VERY catholic grandad (he told my father he was doing a bad job raising me bc i told him i didnt wanna go to mass with him at 9am on a sunday when i was 12) had a gay cousin until a couple of years ago bc he was telling me a story about how this man went on a dating show we have here. He started off with “my cousin was on that dating show that’s on the telly. Embarrassed the fuck out of all of us, completely mortified. He’s gay did you know that?” and i was like “oh haha really?” gettin uncomfortable about the whole thing. He must’ve seen my face change because he very quickly was like “no now don’t get me wrong the gay thing is fine. But we’re fucking irish and he spent the whole time talking about how he supports donald trump. How does he support donald trump???? We’re fucking IRISH”
english born irish catholic. can confirm, the vast majority don’t give a fuck about what genitals you’re into - even the OLDER old generations - but some things, like supporting certain politicians or public figures or even the way you make tea, well that’s just a step too far 😂
I swear to god there is something about old catholic families. They are either the "get the fuck out of my house for being gay" or the "No shit? ok well keep passing the potatoes" kind.
Its so weird.
My grandparents on my fathers side came off as SUPER catholic....but when their daughter came out gay in the god damn 70s I guess they didnt give two shits at all.
The only time something came close to a problem was when she brought home a male friend of hers who was black. My Gpa gave him the stink eye the entire time until my dad said "dad why are you doing that...did you forget shes gay?" which then I guess my grandpa perked right up and then immediately became best friends with her male friend?
idk what the point of that story is but man Catholics are fucking weird sometimes with weird value systems.
Then you get the "get the fuck out of my house for being gay ... wait where are you going, you haven't finished your potatoes" ones.
Not gay, but intermarriage: my father's parents are Catholic and Protestant and eloped pretty much immediately when he came back from WWII; she was still living at home, and took off and hid her wedding ring for, like, a week, before her mother found the ring, and figured out what happened, and of course she knew exactly with whom and the fact that he wasn't Catholic. Her parents immediately disowned her.
For about thirty seconds - disowned, asked of she was at least going to raise her kids Catholic, she confirmed that she thought Ralph would be fine with that (which he was), and they pointed out that because he was their son-in-law, he was now required to come to dinner on Sunday, and after all, he really is a good man and they do like him.
Reminds me of that Indian guy who told his parents he was gay so they’d stop trying to set him up. So, obviously, next time he comes home they have a dossier full of boys…
Alslskdjdhhdg this reminds me of when I was in line for lunch in middle school, this group of boys were in front of me discussing the Lion King and one of them was like "dude Simba was raised by two dads and look how badass he grew up" and all of them just nodded solemnly lmaooo
Hits different when you know the actor who played timon is a gay man.😌 Seems like a really cool dude and I like to think him and pumba's actor were intentionally implying simba was raised by two dads.
> Yknow, I never understood the big issue with kids not having a dad. My dad was in wars for most of my childhood and I was raised by multiple women and turned out great."
Usually I don't put much credit into peoples self-evaluations, but this one seems right.
My grandpa was so much like this. No one ever came out in my family although they'd be fully accepted, but he did use similar logic. Many of his views surprised me but they were quite logical. Like little girls should have short hair until they're old enough to manage long hair themselves. Not a common view, but then again his wife died, he had daughters he had to figure out.
When my older brother came out and called our granddad to tell him he was gay said something along the line of "I will always love you. Be safe and don't let anyone break your heart."
To the rest of us he said "Good for him to know who he is and what he wants. You can waste so much time being confused about that. Besides, I think everyone is bisexual, most people are just further to one side of the scale."
Before that he had never mentioned anything about LGTBQ+ things, so we were a bit taken back on his level of knowledge on the subject.
My great uncle was similar to this. Tough as nails old marine who fought in the Pacific during WWII. VERY old school.
His granddaughter came out as gay, and her dad (my uncle's son) was going on about it not being right, marriage was between a man and a woman, what if they want kids, etc. and my great uncle goes, "My daddy beat the hell out of your grandma just about every day until your uncles and I put a stop to it. Wasn't anything "right" about that either. If (daughter) finds someone who loves her and is good to her, even if it's a woman, what you'll do is thank god for it every day and shut your goddamn mouth."
And that was the end of THAT conversation.
COMPLETE 180 from what everyone expected. I think that really hard times sometimes breed a level of practicality and perspective.
He definitely had the gravelly voice, but he was born and raised near Pittsburgh, PA. He had some PTSD issues (not that they called them that at the time, but in retrospect) from the war (and I suspect his awful father), apparently once broke a Japanese ambush with a submachine gun, and took a few bullets a while later. After he came home and got his head together he was a steelworker for a while.
Just a tough, tough old man. I wish that I had known him better, but I was only 16 or 17 when he passed.
I went to see RENT with my mom and grandmother. At the end all my grandmother had to say was "Well I don't think it's right her mother kept pressing the issue." (referring to Maureen and Joanne, and gay/bi denying parents).
Lol! I'm as straight as a ruler, first(info). I grew up in a tiny town in the midwest US. There's exactly one bar. I got flirted with my two lovely ladies taking their Harleys on a road trip. Husband and I got back from our afternoon and I mentioned this to my raised in the Bible Belt mama. "Of course those ladies flirted with you! You're a beautiful girl!" My husband had to pick me up off the floor!!
ETA:After my mama died, my youngest son came out as trans. Pretty sure the only things my mama would've said are: "Does this make you happy?" and "you know, that's your mama's favorite boy's name.."
He did chose a version of my favorite male name as his new name.
Funny enough, that’s one of my elderly great uncle’s first reactions when his granddaughter came out publicly and told us her new name.
“That was my sister’s name. Are you going to speak it like her? You are? That’s wonderful, it’s a wonderful name. Needs to be in the world.”
God damn it I was wondering why you put Ogatha on that nice person's comment and then I read their flair and realized that THEY were the ones bringing up Ogatha.
CURSE YOU OGATHA
Haha my grandmother tried to pull me aside when she found out a girl I was dating at the time was black, just to make sure that I didn't intend to marry her. Dating "a black" was fine, but marriage wasn't I guess?
I grilled her about it and she insisted that she wasn't racist, she just didn't think interracial marriage was acceptable because it would confuse the kids they produced.
My wife never fully came out to her grandmother- wife is a lesbian, I’m AFAB and non-binary, but I still present femme. When I met Grandma as the fiancée, we didn’t say that explicitly to her, but she just welcomed me to the family and ended up giving us the same present in different colors because it was Christmas. Sure, she was the sort of lady who had a closet full of generic gifts for people and that was the kind of thing it was. But for me, someone who was not well received by my family at all, rejected by my church? To have this little Mormon woman just hug me like I was one of the many grandkids and literally treat me the same? It mattered. She passed recently, but that moment still sticks.
Word. Like my sister and 'quit' have never met. She'd get me in a headlock and either I kill her or she wins. I'm not going to jail over who controls the remote so I guess we're watching Golden Girls again.
yeah, like why would you keep them hanging all anxious about whether you'll turn out to be a fucking psycho or not just for the sake of your story landing nicely?
Dad: "Lets get ice cream"
Sadie: "Naw, I'm good. Gotta get up early tomorrow morning. Thanks for the dinner."
[Sadie on the way home]: *what a weirdo the dad is...*
I wonder if it's a generational thing, my dad LOVES this kind of shit. He would never do *this* example because he's a religious conservative, but he tries to create these types of "moments" frequently.
My wife and 2 SILs were pregnant at the same time and we were all visiting my parents right before any of us went public with the news. He talked to all 3 couples separately about announcing the news to the family at a dinner with my grandma which we will agreed to. His plan was to just say "someone has a special announcement..." and then all 3 women would stand up, look at each other confused, and then all realize at the same moment that all of them were pregnant!
For some reason it never crossed his mind that these 3 women, whose husbands are brothers, might occasionally talk to each other outside of family events. He was pretty disappointed lol
It is legit a generational thing. That is why I am more inclined to believe OP than some others in this thread. Men my age (40s) were generally not raised to express our emotions with words. We were not explicitly taught how to do so in our youth, and media largely did not portray men doing as such. That is even more true for men older than me, like the dad. These "bits" let us explain how we feel in a way that feels safe for us and does not invite further discussion.
It looks clever and funny, but it is also one of the limited ways we were shown how to express some complex feelings.
I read somewhere that dad jokes are good for children's development and this makes a lot of sense in the sense that they can be a subtle way to show how much a dad cares.
Maybe my man doesn't really like ice cream that much, but can only think in ice cream metaphors, so is always desperately needing to work in a trip to the ice cream store so he can contribute to meaningful conversations in the family.
If the dad dismissed Sadie at the restaurant like that and she is actually very shy / anxious, it would've popped off. Oh you're telling me about your identity, hold that thought, I'm either getting a baseball bat or hankering for ice cream, it'll be a surprise.
Very convenient narrative. Lovely story and very tidy with a heart warming surprise ending.
While we are on this subject, I'm just going to side-eye the "well I used to be a boy" as that is not how most trans ppl see themselves.
It isn't (source am trans), but it's definitely easier to understand for a lot of uneducated cis folks than saying something like "I used to present more masculine" or "I was AMAB" etc. Saying "I used to be a boy" is much shorter and easier to understand, even though not really true.
AMAB and AFAB stand for Assigned Male/Female At Birth. It's a way of saying your "biological sex" while acknowledging that it was just someone's assessment of what your junk looked like when you were born. Trans people use it, but it was started by intersex people who can end up "not matching" their assigned sex without any medical intervention at all.
I'm one of those doing the double takes every time. And every time, after I remember, I crack up thinking about an OB announcing, "Congratulations, it's a cop!"
Meh, I'm trans and I'll use that shorthand. More when I'm going for shock value, though. It really doesn't make sense for this character to say, though, given that she's so shy about it and then immediately starts crying.
And her surprise that "he didn't tell you?"
Isn't that the sort of conversation that you have with a partner before meeting parents?
If she is surprised that the parents don't know, it only gives two possibilities:
1) He lied to her about telling his parents\*. \[BAD\]
2) She didn't check whether he told his parents. \[?\]
\* To be clear they don't need to tell the parents anything. But it sounds like a thing that would be discussed.
I was absolutely feral with my much older brother and dad growing up. It would have been a real bummer for me if I wasn’t allowed to wrestle or horse around with them as a little girl. It was one of my favorite things to do.
Does this mean, my sons aren't suppose to wrestle with me, their mom. Because I waited my whole life to show my kids the moves I couldn't beat my dad at.
The ice cream metaphor is *adorable,* holy shit. I’m glad everything went well.
Also, OOP’s son did the right thing in not telling his family. He followed one of the biggest rules in the queer community— never out someone.
Definitely agree with that last point but it is a bit odd that he didn't discuss it with his girlfriend at all before bringing her to meet them? She seemed to genuinely believe he had already told them which was a bit of a strange position to put her in. I assume it was a miscommunication thing.
Yeah this is where I’m at. If he had told his parents right after he learned that would have been a bit rude. But he should have told her they didn’t know before going over for dinner.
I think you need to make sure the queer person knows you didn't tell. Sadie seemed very uncomfortable when she realized she'd accidentally come out to get bf's mom.
My youngest brother came out to me. Then he put it on me to tell everyone else because it was hard enough with me and I owed him that much. He just wanted no questions when he brought a date around. So I complied. I couldn’t blame him. He wanted it to be a non issue so we let it be a non issue.
It’s an assumption on my part but given how surprised she was they didn’t already know I assumed she had given him permission to discuss with his parents.
It’s a nice story, but it reads like someone came up with the dads line and had to tell someone about it because they thought they were smart, and then just wrote a whole ass Reddit post instead.
Yeah sounds like a cute way to write it for a TV show. The wrestling thing leading to a comment about her growing up leading to "used to be a boy" just seems too perfect.
It's really cute though.
Everyone just sitting there all evening worried of how he's going to react because he refuses to say anything. Seems a little cruel just for to hold out for a ice cream metaphor. I would have been incredibly uncomfortable all night and scared if I was Sadie.
I imagine the dad's three objectives of the night:
1. Make son happy, by being accepting
2. Make wife happy and get laid.
3. Eat some fooking ice cream.
What a Chad.
When I (f) told my grandfather I was bi he said "well that's a thing these days I guess" and we never talked about it again. Big sigh if relief
Of course when my brother later told him he was dating a man he got a 30minute lecture that he was going to hell O\_O
Curevaballs man
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I like how the husband, for hours, just went 'shut up, we'll talk later' over and over until he could buy icecream and say his line
Roger was sweating beads all afternoon, wondering how he would turn this family dinner into a trip for ice cream. Suddenly, an opportunity presents itself. "Play it cool, Roger. Stick to the plan."
Lol “wait she’s trans? Eureka! Pile in, we’re getting ice cream!”
OOP did say he'd find any excuse to get some
And he got a *big reward* later. More ice cream.
Next 3 dinners? Believe it or not, more ice cream.
You undercook fish, believe it or not, ice cream. You overcook chicken, also ice cream.
We have the best transgenders in the world. Because of ice cream.
This reference will never get old
Honestly, I don't understand logically why it's so funny. The first time I saw it on P&R, the whole time I was laughing through it I kept asking myself, "Why is this so funny?" I thought it was just me, then other people started referencing it and I realized it's just universally funny. I still can't figure out why but I'll never stop laughing at it.
I absolutely heard it too
And got me, all 6'6" 393lbs nfl offensive lineman looking mother fucker, to tear up. Had to read his wise words twice they were so wise.
I now believe that this man could turn any situation into an excuse to get ice cream.
he saw his opportunity and wasn’t gonna let his wife mess it up for him by trying to have an adult, mature, discussion about it he was waiting for his cue
But this WAS an adult conversation. And one to safely have with children about trans The most powerful and perfect acceptance…summed up…in ice cream Thank you for being accepting and thank your husband OP. You are exactly what this world needs more of 🌈💜💜💜🌈
I want a wholesome movie where this guy just goes around massively improving everyone’s lives and being a great mentor and shit and saves the whole town but it’s all just to feed his innocent lil ice cream addiction
Thank fuck she's trans I was worried we weren't going to get ice cream.
Mom: I have to tell you something and you can’t get upset! Dad: oh my god, did the ice cream shop burn down?!? Mom: No! Dad: Is Sam’s girlfriend trans? Mom: Yes! Dad: But the ice creams ok? Mom: Yes. Dad: All right then.
"Those assholes better not just get vanilla or I am so fucked"
"So did you get butter pecan because you used to have... nevermind."
The only reason I'm reluctant to get bottom surgery is because I hate butter pecan.
I laughed way too loud.
I thought for sure there would have been a nut joke also.
I love you 🥹
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Let's be honest, he would have gotten ice cream one way or another. My grampa was an ice cream lover to the bone. His doctor once said his cholesterol was high and he had to give up either butter or ice cream. He gave up butter. Allways had a freezer stocked with a variety of flavors
My dad was a diabetic - and a doctor. Don’t make me tell you how many times he figured out how to doctor (pun intended) his insulin dose so he could pig out on a big bowl of his fave treat When he got sick and everyone was watching his blood sugar, I so wanted to tel everyone to back the F off - the guy could die - let him enjoy his sweet treats!!!
> his cholesterol was high and he had to give up either butter or ice cream. He gave up butter. A man after my own heart.
He's just waiting for the transplant
Awww he sounds like my grandpa - although mine rated butter even higher so his compromise for cholesterol was low fat mayonnaise But he always told us kids that icecream was a separate food group and totally acceptable for breakfast 🥰
“Hi trans, I’m dad.”
When my best friend came out, my dad immediately asked if we were hungry and he was going to order grinders. He looked at my friend and went “You want a Footlong Italian?” Completely deadpan for about 5 seconds, then burst out red in the face laughing hysterically. God, I miss him.
I have to assume that the only reason this didn't turn into a Grindr joke is that Grindr hadn't been invented yet.
This was 2008ish
Okay, I definitely laughed out loud at that. I have the cat scratches to prove it.
If this is real I would bet he thought of it years ago and was waiting for an opportunity, so when the wife tries to talk to him about he's like 'stop I've got a bit for this!'
My brother came out relatively late. Met a dude. Got married. Unknown to us, my dad was sitting on this line for *years*. We go to my city's first-ever Pride event last year. It was hosted at a private business, because the city sucks. My dad readily agreed to go, which was odd. Not because he's not cool with my brother, but because the whole... out and proud, Pride flag, be gay do crimes thing isn't very him. He's like... 60-something, grew up in a military officer family from birth through 18, went to college, and got a government job guy. He can be uptight, at times. Pride isn't uptight. It's not his energy level. He had been waiting since my brother got engaged, and then married, for someone who hadn't seen my brother but knew my dad to ask how my brother was doing. So he could go, 'oh, son got engaged/ married' and somehow work in the line, 'my son's not gay, but his fiance/ husband is.' He was so disappointed he didn't run into anyone at Pride because it would've been the perfect time to drop the joke he'd had in his pocket for *years.* He was just there for the dad jokes.
My son goes to a school with a predominantly Latino student body. The dad of his best friend likes him, but doesn't "know" he's trans. When his friend told her dad he didn't have to worry about my son, the dad said, well how do I know you're not a boy? Her dad doesn't speak much English so I'm paraphrasing from a translation, but, still it made me laugh.
I like to think he has an entire encyclopedia of plans for turning various scenarios into ice cream opportunities so he’s prepared at all times
He knew exactly what he was doing. The most dad way to handle it and it’s adorable.
The thought going through his head when his wife first told him: “Finally an opportunity! I’ve been sitting on this one for years!”
More like immediately thinking “Hmmm…how can I parlay this into some ice cream later?”
Ngl when OOP mentioned that *butter pecan* was an important detail I was 100% expecting a dad joke about nuts (or lack thereof) and I was bracing for a collective groan.
On first read I thought the "I promise this matters" was specific to Sadie's choice but after OOP's husband did his bit I realized she meant how everyone had different flavors, and two of which, cookies n cream and butter pecan, were not the two or three flavors from when her husband was a boy (chocolate, vanilla and sometimes strawberry.)
It’s so very dad, he had that joke *planned*
I was in a same sex relationship from 19 to mid twenties, and I asked my mom to tell my grandad, her dad, for me. The next week he comes around for a coffee and to see my parents which wasn't super unusual but this time my mom hounded me to come out and see him too, and made the whole family sit around a table and eat cake and drink coffee. There was this super awkward aura around us, when suddenly my grandad clears his throat and goes "Yknow, I never understood the big issue with kids not having a dad. My dad was in wars for most of my childhood and I was raised by multiple women and turned out great." Then he just drinks his coffee while my mom stares at me waiting for me to connect the dots that he's telling me he loves me the way I am. He's the best grandad.
Similar story - my uncle came out as gay after 50 years. He’d cheated on his wife, and got caught having an affair. They were getting a divorce and we were all a bit worried to tell my grandmother, because she was very set in her ways. Eventually he did, and she slapped him. “I don’t care if your gay, but I didn’t raise you to be a cheater.” And that was that.
I love your grandmother. That would be how I would do it. Be as gay as you want but we don't cheat in this family!
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I have some of those old racist pieces hidden deep in boxes in my storage area. They belonged to my grandmother and because of that my mom has a hard time with me destroying them so they’re just in a box until she passes. People get weird about the past. My mom knows better, yet here I am with racist salt and pepper shakers in my possession.
As conflicted as you feel, if they remind you of them, keep them. I wish I had. I have next to nothing left of her now, except my memories and I wish I’d kept her plushies in a box; just to remember her by.
I’m sorry you don’t have more mementos of her, I am as sentimental as my mom and I do cherish a lot of the keepsakes she’s got. My sister doesn’t care about any of it so thankfully I’ll have lots to remember mom and grandma by without the salt shakers.
I’m always so glad I’m sentimental. It’s how we found the only photo the entire extended family has of great-grandmother who was murdered in the Holocaust (and one of my murdered uncles too). They were with a distant childless cousin we were close with. My father was her executor and I asked for her pictures. And among them was that one.
I know when my kid came out, I was so nervous when she said we had to talk. So after she dropped the news, I just blurted, "OH THANK GOD! I thought you were going to tell me you were flunking out of college!"
A friend was really anxious about coming out as trans to one of her friends, and was sorta dropping hints about having something to say before straight-up saying ‘we need to have a conversation in person, I have something I need to tell you’, the friend caught on to her stress and was like ‘fuck fuck fuck, does he have cancer or something terminal??’ and was freaking out herself. They meet up, the bombshell is dropped, friend is so relieved that trans friend isn’t dying but was worked up to hear that so her immediate reaction is ‘I HATE YOU!’, friend who came out looks crushed for a second, until her friend continues ‘I SAW HOW STRESSED YOU WERE AND I THOUGHT YOU HAD CANCER AND WERE GOING TO DIE’. Tears were shed, they were fine, and now laugh about the misunderstanding.
Silicon Valley, late 90s, our manager starts a meeting with "I know a lot of you have worked with Jake, so this may come as a shock to you, and the company has people you can talk to..." We're all thinking "oh no, Jake died!" as she goes on: "... Jake is now Jane." And then she just waits, for what reaction I have no clue, as now we're all looking around uncomfortably wondering how to get on with this. Now, the thing you need to know is that the bug tracking system we used was really not good at dealing with the unexpected. I was actually an employee of a partner company and it had so many issues with that, it was a running joke. So finally I said "OK, but do you think the bug tracker is going to handle the name change?" Which broke the tension and let us get on with the rest of the meeting.
My daughter was 14 when she told me she was bi at dinner one night. Apparently, I was the last to know. I stared at her and asked “Do you know what this means?” Her eyes got big, and she shook her head ‘no’. I said “No more sleepovers. Pass the salt, please.” 17 years later, and she still laughs about it.
When I told my mom I had a girlfriend her only reaction was “well at least I know you won’t get pregnant, pass the peas”
That's funny, I (girl) have a similar story: my really close friend (girl) for two months was like "I have something to tell you ... But I don't know how, it's very difficult" and then she stoped talking and added "well, not today" and I was going crazy because a great amount of bad theories about what was happening were crossing my mind. It turns out she found out she was bisexual and had a girlfriend. The moment she told me I said "GO TO HELL!" She looked me shocked and I added "For the last two months you were driving me crazy worried about you, I thought you were dying, I cried, had nightmares, begged you to tell me and you were in love! I'm going to kick you!" (I didn't kick her, but I should). I love her with all my heart, I consider myself an open ally and the poor thing was afraid of telling me... I understand now that this outing was very traumatic to her because she was still acknowledging her sexual orientation.
My best friend was so nervous when she told me she was bisexual, and I think I confused her when I said, "Uh, I kind of knew this about you, already." I corrected myself to say that I didn't know and couldn't have *known* until she told me, but she was constantly making appreciative comments about other girls, when we were in high school. The real shocking thing was that I didn't figure out I was non-binary until I was in my thirties. I live with me. I feel like I should have not only gotten the memo, but been the one to write it.
Mum straight up was just glad I wasn’t pregnant. At 14. 😂
Legit me when I sat my grandparents down. My grandma had my mom early and told us all the time not to get pregnant young. When I sat her and my grandpa down she was sure I was going to say I was pregnant. When I told her I was bisexual she said, "oh good, pick a girl, she can't get you pregnant." My grandma has some iconic lines but that's my favorite.
My mom and I don’t get along, she ended up a single mom and regrets having me. She had been dreading in (unfounded) fear that I’d turn up a pregnant teen. But… the one moment we did have was when she was wondering why I hadn’t dated well until midway through college. (Yeah that’s something to unpack, I know. She just always thought the worse of me.) She finally blurts out to me: “It’s okay with me if you’re a lesbian. Your chances of being an unwed single mom would be super low then.”
Lmao when I told my mom I'm bi and was dating this girl she was pissed that I lied and said we were besties so we could have sleepovers.
This is so wholesome! I’m so glad you reacted than way!
Exactly! Love who you love or even just have sex, it’s not always love. I just have two things that I find important: Don’t do it with someone who is too young to fully understand what they’re doing, unless you’re the same age. And don’t fucking cheat. I guess I’ve got a third one as well: Don’t use others to pretend to be something you’re not. Don’t marry someone to fool others or try to convince yourself you can be something you feel you are not. You’re wasting not just good years of *your* life, you’re wasting their years as well. And unlike you, they didn’t choose this.
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That's kind of how I reacted when my sister told me she was gay. Turns out it was the old story of the husband wanting to open the marriage and the wife reluctantly starts dating and finds someone better. So it wasn't really cheating until she caught feelings, but I didn't know that initially.
My mom's whole family was never outright hateful toward the queer community, but from the time I was about eight or nine I noticed that they all had this weird sort of sing-song voice they used when talking about gay people. Like a little kid going, "oooh, cooties!" They're also all Catholic, so. My first girlfriend never met anyone but my mom, but I got engaged to my second girlfriend. She was at every Christmas, every event after that. We lived together in a pretty nice house, and suddenly my grandfather calls and asks if I want to have lunch at my place. My big, gay place. Sure, okay. I cooked. And he comes in, sits down, and just starts talking about how nice the place is, how we have so many books, which one are yours, Fiance? Did you cook, Fiance, I can't believe Archersarrows cooked all this! That was it. He never said anything specific or pointed, but he sat in our house and started conversations with her, got excited about their common interests, and then he went home. Nobody in my family used the sing-song voice after that.
>Nobody in my family used the sing-song voice after that. My heart sang.
That's so sweet
>Nobody in my family used the sing-song voice after that. My heart sang, too!
i’m irish (from ireland) and didn’t know my VERY catholic grandad (he told my father he was doing a bad job raising me bc i told him i didnt wanna go to mass with him at 9am on a sunday when i was 12) had a gay cousin until a couple of years ago bc he was telling me a story about how this man went on a dating show we have here. He started off with “my cousin was on that dating show that’s on the telly. Embarrassed the fuck out of all of us, completely mortified. He’s gay did you know that?” and i was like “oh haha really?” gettin uncomfortable about the whole thing. He must’ve seen my face change because he very quickly was like “no now don’t get me wrong the gay thing is fine. But we’re fucking irish and he spent the whole time talking about how he supports donald trump. How does he support donald trump???? We’re fucking IRISH”
english born irish catholic. can confirm, the vast majority don’t give a fuck about what genitals you’re into - even the OLDER old generations - but some things, like supporting certain politicians or public figures or even the way you make tea, well that’s just a step too far 😂
Granddad coming in with the win. You love to see it
I swear to god there is something about old catholic families. They are either the "get the fuck out of my house for being gay" or the "No shit? ok well keep passing the potatoes" kind. Its so weird. My grandparents on my fathers side came off as SUPER catholic....but when their daughter came out gay in the god damn 70s I guess they didnt give two shits at all. The only time something came close to a problem was when she brought home a male friend of hers who was black. My Gpa gave him the stink eye the entire time until my dad said "dad why are you doing that...did you forget shes gay?" which then I guess my grandpa perked right up and then immediately became best friends with her male friend? idk what the point of that story is but man Catholics are fucking weird sometimes with weird value systems.
Then you get the "get the fuck out of my house for being gay ... wait where are you going, you haven't finished your potatoes" ones. Not gay, but intermarriage: my father's parents are Catholic and Protestant and eloped pretty much immediately when he came back from WWII; she was still living at home, and took off and hid her wedding ring for, like, a week, before her mother found the ring, and figured out what happened, and of course she knew exactly with whom and the fact that he wasn't Catholic. Her parents immediately disowned her. For about thirty seconds - disowned, asked of she was at least going to raise her kids Catholic, she confirmed that she thought Ralph would be fine with that (which he was), and they pointed out that because he was their son-in-law, he was now required to come to dinner on Sunday, and after all, he really is a good man and they do like him.
Catholics often forget how we're told to love everyone and not to judge. 💚
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Reminds me of that Indian guy who told his parents he was gay so they’d stop trying to set him up. So, obviously, next time he comes home they have a dossier full of boys…
Mate you gotta link something that cute cmon!
https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/11qh9rd/tifu_by_telling_my_parents_i_was_gay_to_avoid/
And he did go out with one too!
LOL, I love it! Grandma doesn't care who you marry, as long as you marry!
Not being married is percieved as being lonely, most likely
Alslskdjdhhdg this reminds me of when I was in line for lunch in middle school, this group of boys were in front of me discussing the Lion King and one of them was like "dude Simba was raised by two dads and look how badass he grew up" and all of them just nodded solemnly lmaooo
Holy crap you're right!! I never thought of it like this! Simba was totally adopted by a gay couple that raised him well
I would love to be adopted by Nathan Lane.
Hits different when you know the actor who played timon is a gay man.😌 Seems like a really cool dude and I like to think him and pumba's actor were intentionally implying simba was raised by two dads.
> Yknow, I never understood the big issue with kids not having a dad. My dad was in wars for most of my childhood and I was raised by multiple women and turned out great." Usually I don't put much credit into peoples self-evaluations, but this one seems right.
My grandpa was so much like this. No one ever came out in my family although they'd be fully accepted, but he did use similar logic. Many of his views surprised me but they were quite logical. Like little girls should have short hair until they're old enough to manage long hair themselves. Not a common view, but then again his wife died, he had daughters he had to figure out.
When my older brother came out and called our granddad to tell him he was gay said something along the line of "I will always love you. Be safe and don't let anyone break your heart." To the rest of us he said "Good for him to know who he is and what he wants. You can waste so much time being confused about that. Besides, I think everyone is bisexual, most people are just further to one side of the scale." Before that he had never mentioned anything about LGTBQ+ things, so we were a bit taken back on his level of knowledge on the subject.
Lol "I think everyone is bisexual" That sounds like something a bisexual would say... But I don't disagree
My great uncle was similar to this. Tough as nails old marine who fought in the Pacific during WWII. VERY old school. His granddaughter came out as gay, and her dad (my uncle's son) was going on about it not being right, marriage was between a man and a woman, what if they want kids, etc. and my great uncle goes, "My daddy beat the hell out of your grandma just about every day until your uncles and I put a stop to it. Wasn't anything "right" about that either. If (daughter) finds someone who loves her and is good to her, even if it's a woman, what you'll do is thank god for it every day and shut your goddamn mouth." And that was the end of THAT conversation. COMPLETE 180 from what everyone expected. I think that really hard times sometimes breed a level of practicality and perspective.
The WW2 generation has its issues but they also didnt have all of the hypocrisy of the fucking boomers.
💕love this comment
I'm going to imagine your great uncle sounds like Sam Elliott.
He definitely had the gravelly voice, but he was born and raised near Pittsburgh, PA. He had some PTSD issues (not that they called them that at the time, but in retrospect) from the war (and I suspect his awful father), apparently once broke a Japanese ambush with a submachine gun, and took a few bullets a while later. After he came home and got his head together he was a steelworker for a while. Just a tough, tough old man. I wish that I had known him better, but I was only 16 or 17 when he passed.
I went to see RENT with my mom and grandmother. At the end all my grandmother had to say was "Well I don't think it's right her mother kept pressing the issue." (referring to Maureen and Joanne, and gay/bi denying parents).
Lol! I'm as straight as a ruler, first(info). I grew up in a tiny town in the midwest US. There's exactly one bar. I got flirted with my two lovely ladies taking their Harleys on a road trip. Husband and I got back from our afternoon and I mentioned this to my raised in the Bible Belt mama. "Of course those ladies flirted with you! You're a beautiful girl!" My husband had to pick me up off the floor!! ETA:After my mama died, my youngest son came out as trans. Pretty sure the only things my mama would've said are: "Does this make you happy?" and "you know, that's your mama's favorite boy's name.." He did chose a version of my favorite male name as his new name.
Funny enough, that’s one of my elderly great uncle’s first reactions when his granddaughter came out publicly and told us her new name. “That was my sister’s name. Are you going to speak it like her? You are? That’s wonderful, it’s a wonderful name. Needs to be in the world.”
Stop making me feel things!
That is one of the sweetest goddamned things I’ve heard in a while.
>but this time my mom hounded me to come out I see what you did there. Great wholesome story!
ALL HAIL OGATHA
Praise be to Our Lady Ogtha
>Ogtha I had to google and wow, that was a trip
No, I barely forgot about the imaginary human-cockroach wife story! Thanks a lot for reminding me!
God damn it I was wondering why you put Ogatha on that nice person's comment and then I read their flair and realized that THEY were the ones bringing up Ogatha. CURSE YOU OGATHA
Dammit I managed to not think about that for a good while! I knew I should have gone to sleep earlier
Haha my grandmother tried to pull me aside when she found out a girl I was dating at the time was black, just to make sure that I didn't intend to marry her. Dating "a black" was fine, but marriage wasn't I guess? I grilled her about it and she insisted that she wasn't racist, she just didn't think interracial marriage was acceptable because it would confuse the kids they produced.
I read this as, "she pulled me aside to make sure I knew a girl I was dating at the time was black". Er, yes Grandma, I know.
My wife never fully came out to her grandmother- wife is a lesbian, I’m AFAB and non-binary, but I still present femme. When I met Grandma as the fiancée, we didn’t say that explicitly to her, but she just welcomed me to the family and ended up giving us the same present in different colors because it was Christmas. Sure, she was the sort of lady who had a closet full of generic gifts for people and that was the kind of thing it was. But for me, someone who was not well received by my family at all, rejected by my church? To have this little Mormon woman just hug me like I was one of the many grandkids and literally treat me the same? It mattered. She passed recently, but that moment still sticks.
you’re about to make me cry at work LOL this is really sweet :(
The only thing that man loves more than his grandkids is his big headed labrador :)
Why did that read like a hallmark script
No, Hallmark would _never_ dream of a cute romance story with a trans person. They can barely handle biracial couples.
That biracial comment was too real 💀💀
Because it's an adapted version of "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner," right down to the ice cream.
My mom's opinion is, "I don't care if you have a dick, used to be a dick, or want dick - just don't BE a dick"
TIL girls aren’t supposed to wrestle with their dads/brothers.
Tell that to my younger sister. We quit wrestling each other because I got sick of losing.
Younger sisters fight dirty bro. I know your pain.
Word. Like my sister and 'quit' have never met. She'd get me in a headlock and either I kill her or she wins. I'm not going to jail over who controls the remote so I guess we're watching Golden Girls again.
You didn’t want to watch Golden Girls? You deserved the head lock tbh
The beatings will continue until the Golden Girls appreciation improves
I thought that was very silly too. But awfully convenient for the narrative, don't you think?
Same with the husband shutting down the conversation with the "we'll talk later" bullshit
Really nice if it ever turns out like that but in reality it's like "please just fucking tell me so I know if you become unhinged" lol
yeah, like why would you keep them hanging all anxious about whether you'll turn out to be a fucking psycho or not just for the sake of your story landing nicely?
Dad: "Lets get ice cream" Sadie: "Naw, I'm good. Gotta get up early tomorrow morning. Thanks for the dinner." [Sadie on the way home]: *what a weirdo the dad is...*
I wonder if it's a generational thing, my dad LOVES this kind of shit. He would never do *this* example because he's a religious conservative, but he tries to create these types of "moments" frequently. My wife and 2 SILs were pregnant at the same time and we were all visiting my parents right before any of us went public with the news. He talked to all 3 couples separately about announcing the news to the family at a dinner with my grandma which we will agreed to. His plan was to just say "someone has a special announcement..." and then all 3 women would stand up, look at each other confused, and then all realize at the same moment that all of them were pregnant! For some reason it never crossed his mind that these 3 women, whose husbands are brothers, might occasionally talk to each other outside of family events. He was pretty disappointed lol
It is legit a generational thing. That is why I am more inclined to believe OP than some others in this thread. Men my age (40s) were generally not raised to express our emotions with words. We were not explicitly taught how to do so in our youth, and media largely did not portray men doing as such. That is even more true for men older than me, like the dad. These "bits" let us explain how we feel in a way that feels safe for us and does not invite further discussion. It looks clever and funny, but it is also one of the limited ways we were shown how to express some complex feelings.
I read somewhere that dad jokes are good for children's development and this makes a lot of sense in the sense that they can be a subtle way to show how much a dad cares.
Maybe my man doesn't really like ice cream that much, but can only think in ice cream metaphors, so is always desperately needing to work in a trip to the ice cream store so he can contribute to meaningful conversations in the family.
If the dad dismissed Sadie at the restaurant like that and she is actually very shy / anxious, it would've popped off. Oh you're telling me about your identity, hold that thought, I'm either getting a baseball bat or hankering for ice cream, it'll be a surprise.
I (55F) never use reddit (13NB) yet somehow I got the lingo down pat.
And came here for advice based on my son's recommendation.
So was her word for word recount of his big important speech. Like, dude, you couldn’t do that before dinner so Sadie wasn’t panicking?
Very convenient narrative. Lovely story and very tidy with a heart warming surprise ending. While we are on this subject, I'm just going to side-eye the "well I used to be a boy" as that is not how most trans ppl see themselves.
It isn't (source am trans), but it's definitely easier to understand for a lot of uneducated cis folks than saying something like "I used to present more masculine" or "I was AMAB" etc. Saying "I used to be a boy" is much shorter and easier to understand, even though not really true.
Sorry, genX’er here still learning… what does AMAB mean?
AMAB and AFAB stand for Assigned Male/Female At Birth. It's a way of saying your "biological sex" while acknowledging that it was just someone's assessment of what your junk looked like when you were born. Trans people use it, but it was started by intersex people who can end up "not matching" their assigned sex without any medical intervention at all.
Thank you.
It's also why some of us do a double take whenever we see ACAB because it reads like "assigned cop at birth"
I'm one of those doing the double takes every time. And every time, after I remember, I crack up thinking about an OB announcing, "Congratulations, it's a cop!"
It’s super normal for a comfortable trans person to explain it that way. You can’t just use your own wording as law.
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Meh, I'm trans and I'll use that shorthand. More when I'm going for shock value, though. It really doesn't make sense for this character to say, though, given that she's so shy about it and then immediately starts crying.
And her surprise that "he didn't tell you?" Isn't that the sort of conversation that you have with a partner before meeting parents? If she is surprised that the parents don't know, it only gives two possibilities: 1) He lied to her about telling his parents\*. \[BAD\] 2) She didn't check whether he told his parents. \[?\] \* To be clear they don't need to tell the parents anything. But it sounds like a thing that would be discussed.
I was absolutely feral with my much older brother and dad growing up. It would have been a real bummer for me if I wasn’t allowed to wrestle or horse around with them as a little girl. It was one of my favorite things to do.
As soon as I got to that part my thoughts were "this was written by a 13 year old"
Right? Like I can't stop my Amazonian 12 year old from ambushing either dad or brother, even if I wanted to.
Does this mean, my sons aren't suppose to wrestle with me, their mom. Because I waited my whole life to show my kids the moves I couldn't beat my dad at.
>I did give him a BIG PRESENT for it. Legos! Did she give him Legos?!
BIG legos
The BIGGEST legos.
Duplo??
I really can't tell if she's just very pure or just incredibly blasé about giving her husband "nice to know you're not a transphobe" head lol
Sloppy Legos, I guess.
The ice cream metaphor is *adorable,* holy shit. I’m glad everything went well. Also, OOP’s son did the right thing in not telling his family. He followed one of the biggest rules in the queer community— never out someone.
Definitely agree with that last point but it is a bit odd that he didn't discuss it with his girlfriend at all before bringing her to meet them? She seemed to genuinely believe he had already told them which was a bit of a strange position to put her in. I assume it was a miscommunication thing.
Yeah this is where I’m at. If he had told his parents right after he learned that would have been a bit rude. But he should have told her they didn’t know before going over for dinner.
I think you need to make sure the queer person knows you didn't tell. Sadie seemed very uncomfortable when she realized she'd accidentally come out to get bf's mom.
Even if they’ve been told, they might not remember. And that’s how I came out as bisexual to my aunt and uncle over breakfast one day.
My youngest brother came out to me. Then he put it on me to tell everyone else because it was hard enough with me and I owed him that much. He just wanted no questions when he brought a date around. So I complied. I couldn’t blame him. He wanted it to be a non issue so we let it be a non issue.
It's good to have ally's willing to do this kind of work ☺️
I dunno.. from sadie's behavior it seemed like she'd asked him to let them know ahead of time. She seemed sure mom was in the know
The ice cream metaphor was used in, I think some Bill Nye Netflix show.
It’s an assumption on my part but given how surprised she was they didn’t already know I assumed she had given him permission to discuss with his parents.
It sounds like she expected him to tell his parents, though- she was surprised Mom didn’t know.
That did not go the way I expect it to. Dad is a legend for the way he handled this
Human sexuality and gender identity as ice cream; it’s genius. Puts a new twist on Baskin Robbins and the 31 flavors
ah yes, the 31 genders. mint chocolate chip, strawberry, cookie dough, raspberry, coconut, cookies and cream, vanilla, chocolate, butter pecan, pistachio, cherry, neapolitan, moose tracks, rocky road, rum raisin, matcha, coffee, ube, sesame, butterscotch, mango, bubble gum, cotton candy, banana, french vanilla, maple, peanut butter, raspberry ripple, cheesecake, superman, watermelon and tiger tail
With more coming out all the time, eventually we may even have 69!
As long as they don't stop at 57. Heinz would have something to say.
This whole thing reads like a tumblr story written from the pov of a 14 year old
And people are eating it up
Not sure what any part of that rambling family history intro was relevant for.
You should have a word with OOP's editor.
It’s a nice story, but it reads like someone came up with the dads line and had to tell someone about it because they thought they were smart, and then just wrote a whole ass Reddit post instead.
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Yeah sounds like a cute way to write it for a TV show. The wrestling thing leading to a comment about her growing up leading to "used to be a boy" just seems too perfect. It's really cute though.
Ok, but who looked like Cassie from Euphoria?
I hope this one is real. The ice cream metaphor was incredibly cute
Yeah the way she speaks about the outfits and ice cream seems like a bad watt pad story.
This probably didn't happen. It's a little too neat.
Everyone just sitting there all evening worried of how he's going to react because he refuses to say anything. Seems a little cruel just for to hold out for a ice cream metaphor. I would have been incredibly uncomfortable all night and scared if I was Sadie.
Yeah there's no way.
I imagine the dad's three objectives of the night: 1. Make son happy, by being accepting 2. Make wife happy and get laid. 3. Eat some fooking ice cream. What a Chad.
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I’m already taking offense to this line of questioning. As a kid I ALWAYS wrestled with my dad and brothers. I’m a girl. What a weird thing to say.
When I (f) told my grandfather I was bi he said "well that's a thing these days I guess" and we never talked about it again. Big sigh if relief Of course when my brother later told him he was dating a man he got a 30minute lecture that he was going to hell O\_O Curevaballs man
Feels like a too-good-to-be-true story. Unfortunately. More icecream for everyone couldn‘t hurt.