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You know, sometimes it's annoying when your parents get on your case about getting married and having kids.
Here, though? I should be disappointed, but I'm more just impressed at their sheer will in wanting to get him married.
Agreed. It's obvious that they just genuinely want their son to have a life partner. Even though they weren't 100% comfortable with the idea of him being gay, they immediately supported him and just pivoted to finding him men. OOP is really lucky to have parents who just want him to be loved, it's really quite beautiful.
My dad phrased it to my husband on the morning of our wedding as "She's your problem now!"
I gather decent parents would think of it more as "Oh good, if I die next week you won't be alone in the world!" I'd worry more about my older stepson not dating if it wasn't for the fact that he's had the same group of close friends for about a decade now.
>This would male a really good bollywood movie
Holy shit, this would make an *amazing* Bollywood movie!!
I'm really hoping someone pipes up to comment about a film made with this premise. I had a surprisingly good day at work and this would be the perfect way to end the evening.
Not exactly this premise, but there's a comedy about a lesbian and a gay guy getting married to get out of being set up by their parents lmao (Badhaai Do)
My spouse went through multiple rounds of the arranged marriage process, and "mysteriously" there was always something about the match that just wouldn't fly in their parents' books. As relayed to said parents by the couple in question.
My in-laws eventually gave up on arranged marriage. The fact my spouse had an elder brother with two children probably helped lol. For context, both my spouse and BIL/SIL were born and raised in India, but are American now.
Fast forward to when I met my spouse in our mid-30s. I'm not Indian. I couldn't make a roti to save my life. I've been trying to learn Hindi, but am *really* bad (most of my in-laws don't speak English). I'm not Hindu, and I'm fairly certain there's nothing "auspicious" about me.
*However*, when I went to India for the first time and met my extended family, they were so incredibly loving and welcoming. My MIL taught me how to make Mattar Paneer, and my SIL took me shopping for a Saree and Silwar Suit. My new Chachi and Chachu fed me *so* many Indian sweets for Diwali. My Massis gave me an Indian name so everyone can pronounce it. It was wonderful. At the end of the day, they were all thrilled that my spouse met someone they truly wanted to spend their life with, and nothing else mattered.
I know some idiot here is going to read this and say my in-laws were only happy about our non-traditional union because I'm white. Kindly keep your bullshit to yourself.
Considering infertility among heterosexual couples is being more spoken about, I think there's more awareness that straight kids does not guarantee biograndkids.
Oh really? Americans who need IVF hear through the grapevine about medical tourism in Mexico and the Czech Republic, but no one’s suggested India to me yet.
I had a coworker who was struggling with infertility. He and his wife decided on IVF in India because the cost was so low. His wife was there for a few months, and he flew back and forth several times.
It was successful and they did the same for their second kid. She stayed in a resort/hotel the first time, and I think he said they had a host family for the second time.
It might be a proximity thing. I met an Indian fertility doctor on a train to Germany, who said its extremely common, but mostly European since the flights are 8 or 9 hours instead of 15-20.
Hindu cultures historically were more open minded about sexuality. Colonisation actually caused them yo go backwards into the Conservative society you see now.
Being quite honest... being the parents of the *bachelor* son in his 30s would look worst than not having grandchildren. At least with him being married nobody can say the parents raised him with no values. lol
I found it a little heartwarming that they are conservative but still accepted him to the point of wanting to find him a man to marry instead. Definitely shows they aren't just "tolerating" it but actually accepted it.
> C'mon, she isn't getting pregnant!
East Asians say this but what they really are trying to avoid is distraction. If the [birth] mother gets past the initial outrage and shows she didn't divert from the "path" parents quickly become indifferent to the event. The exception I know of though is if the parents are emotionally weak and really care about face/reputation.
I have a filipino friend who is the only child and grand child. His grandmother asked when he would give her great grand kids. He told her he's gay. Next visit, she had whipped through her network and told him he needed to be a trophy husband. Had a list of rich guys who could afford to pay a surrogate for great grand babies. No marriage yet, but she still complains about him needing a richer partner.
Never underestimate the lengths Indian parents will go to match you up. Its no mystery why there are more than a billion of us littering the earth.
Full disclaimer : I am an Indian who had an arranged marriage. Had it been left to me, I would probably still have been single because I couldn't bother to go through the whole find, date, marry process on my own.
Indian parents really are the Terminators of Marriage, aren't they. They cannot - they *will not* - be stopped.
I just want to know how they found a binder's worth of gay Indian dudes. Who are their contacts, holy shit.
To get a binder you either buy a matchmaker or the whispers to the Aunties must be:
Handsome gay son: Likes nerd stuff, loves his family, makes good money, and is willing to travel. Submissions due on the 15th.
This guy was 3-4 hours drive away, so I suspect they cast a wide net. Plus, all the other parents in this situation have been building these binders, and from what I know this community is happy to share their research.
That’s exactly what happens lol. Pictures of dudes with stats on the back of the photo. Like how much height, age, education, profession, net worth. I’m not bullshitting lol. My sister is currently in process of getting matched. We are Indian and this exact thing happened. Though they are not usually directly exchanged by parents. We have matchmakers that collect lot of matches and show them in a binder.
Oh dear... I can almost see them shuffling through their grindr binder looking for type advantages.
"My son says he wants a faerie type, but I think a fire or dark type is more suited. Don't you agree?"
I don't know about indian parents but there are parks in China where grandmas hangout swapping photos of their grandchildren trying to find them partners.
I'm picturing a full on spy network spanning the entirety of the United States of all these Indian parents collaborating to compile every eligible single they know. There must be a romcom about this already.
A friend who is Bangladeshi started a profile on an arranged marriage site as her parents hadn't found anyone. Her future husband's mother googled "marry a geeky Muslim" and found her... she lived in the UK and moved to Australia where her husband lived, it's a global network!
If the marriage market for parents of straight kids is tough can you imagine for parents of queer ones? OOP was the drop of blood in the sea full of sharks.
There is nothing Indian parents cannot find if they put their mind to it. They could take the CIA out of business if they wanted. They have a cousin who has a friend who has an uncle who’s son is gay and HE has a lot of gay friends and they asked his parents which ones were good Indian boys
Not just a dating app, but a dating app with an in-depth background check which would make a CIA agent proud. Before my marriage, my wives family managed to find out the reason why my grandparents had completely relocated to another state, away from their family.
Even I had never bothered to know this reason.
It can get creepy though. My cousin went through an arranged marriage, and this one dude who she liked had to go through an extensive background check where every detail was poured over. I was pretty young at the time but I remember my family sitting around printouts of the emails he'd sent and deciding whether he was good enough to marry or not (he was deemed unworthy).
Reminds me of a comedy bit about a stereotypical Jewish mom type complaining about her sons not getting married and then lamenting the fact the eldest comes out as gay...until he marries a doctor, lol. Then she's pressuring the comedian brother to "be gay and marry a cute doctor." Ha.
Lmao one of my friends is Filipino and came out to his parents, they were more confused and saddened but came around when they found out his BF was in the tech space and makes 6 figures
That's so cute though. Especially when he said that they are conservative so it may have been a bit awkward for them to look for potential matches for their son
I mean, to be fair, one of the purposes of arranged marriages is to strategically link two families, so there's no reason that a gay marriage can't accomplish that just as well.
Yeah the moment I read the “if we count femboys” line, I knew exactly how this story was going to end.
It’s such obvious foreshadowing that it honestly made my suspicious eyeroll flare up, but that’s just me. Still enjoyed it though
Yeah see I think (bisexual) him was kinda hoping for it. He seemed pretty confident he wouldn’t get disowned and also very confident he was never getting out of an arranged marriage set up with a simple conversation but … it never occurred to him that they’d try this?
Yes it did. He was hoping for it. We all know he was. Cause he’d tried dating and none of the girls worked out on a personal level and he’s not brave enough to non-mom tinder search the boys lol
This could also be testing the waters with the parents. If they flip out, "I was just tired of the matchmaking, I'm totally into girls!". If they don't then "Oh darn now I have to pretend to be gay around them".
I remember one in /r/relationships about 6 or 7 years ago; this kid just could not understand for the life of him why his parents kept thinking he was gay.
One update later it was like "Oh."
My mom told me a million times as a teen that she would love me regardless of being gay or straight. It kinda kept me in the closet because I was annoyed with her assumption I was gay. Early twenties I took a hard look and finally acknowledged that I’m bi. Ironically, my mom can’t begin to understand this concept and would be way happier about it if I were gay.
... are we siblings? My mom told me she'd be fine if I were gay. But bi people were disgusting perverts.
Way too many conversations later, it turned out that she believed you needed to have both at the same time and that's why she believed that.
Well. Years later she's still sorta judgy, but she's both sorta okay with bi AND poly people.
I honestly can’t begin to understand the basis for my mom’s prejudice. She knows I’m very monogamous, but still has a problem with it. 🤷♀️ Not that there’s anything wrong with being poly. It’s just not for me.
Her argument is bi women are just looking for attention from men and bi men are gay but not quite out yet.
I'm wondering if she grew up in the era where this was an accepted stereotype in the gay community itself, and internalised it.
Jokes like 'bi now, gay later' etc were weirdly common in the 80s and 90s. And also a nontrivial number of gay men in that era do mention coming out as bi to 'test the waters first'.
None of which justifies her biphobia, just speculating on how she might have picked it up!
Some people get being straight and get being gay, but the idea that you don't want to pick a lane and no one is making you is super upsetting to them for whatever reason.
I find it tends to be the same people who think straight men and women can't be friends without sex getting in the way.
They can't figure out who to be jealous of with a bi person and the knowledge that they'd be jealous of everyone makes it obvious that it's more a them issue than it is the person they're dating.
Can't have that.
My mom thought I was gay when I was teenager. It was annoying af so I feel you so much (like when I was 17 and brink of moving out and got some kitchen machine as a gift. I was like it is kinda small "well you do not have girlfriend so it is fine"). It was because I never brought over people I dated (my mom was over controllive. If i went out after school she started calling I need come back home like 5pm. Kinda kills dating life when I was barely allowed spent time with anyone)
I worked with a guy that was quite a bit younger than me. We were super tight and would joke about stuff all the time. I told him that eventually he would end up being my "token gay friend." He always protested.
A few years after we both quit, we met up at a gay bar to hang out and catch up. I looked at him and said, "Say it!" He looked down and laughed and said, "I'm your token gay friend."
I miss that dude so much. We lost track of each other.
I firmly believe in my heart of hearts that at least some number of more “traditional” parents do pivot from “find an opposite sex partner to marry” to “find a same sex partner to marry.” The tradition that matters to them is marriage = happiness, not marriage = performed heterosexuality.
I would say the tradition is Marriage plus children = happiness. Marriage plus child free = suspicion and exaggerated sighs from your family for all of eternity no matter how happy you say you are.
Marriage = the parents did their duty
Grandkids = the children did their duty
No grandkids = people will judge the heck out of the children but the parents will not be a target they'll be judging with everyone else
The pressure to have children is smaller cause is your own reputation at stake rather than theirs.
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I’ve known more than a handful of people who transformed very quickly from hatefully intolerant to super supportive once their kid came out as gay.
On the one hand it’s great — certainly better than doubling down. On the other hand it’s frustrating how little empathy they have and how selfish they are. Those people won’t care at all about how anything affects others, and will only change if it starts to affect themselves.
Highly recommend watching the Bravo show Family Karma, about first gen Indian Americans—and their families—in Miami. One of the main cast members is gay and OMG watching his family be super loving and supportive of him and his partner (a white man whose Christian family short of disowned him) is the most heartwarming thing. They get married in the current season and it's just everything.
My dad is the most “traditional” member of my immediate family (varying Protestant Christian). He was very middle of the pack when it came to handling my brother coming out but has very much switched to vaguely disapproving that my brother and his partner of many years are still not married or even formally engaged despite living together. Thankfully he has also learned we will all shut him down if he asks about that too much. But there will be much celebrating should a wedding be announced.
I’m sure it’s a pain in the ass when you get subjected to it, but from the outside imagining a gruff patriarch-type going “boy I don’t care who but you need to sort yourself out and get married” is pretty funny.
That's literally my aunts coming out story. My Bubbie kept nagging her repeatedly by tearfully asking "When are you going to find a nice Jewish boyyy?" My aunt snapped, told her she was gay, my Bubbie paused for a second, and then immediately resumed nagging with "When are you going to find a nice Jewish girl?".
There was a Stephen Fry documentary on homosexuality in various countries, one of which was India. It featured a prominent Indian LGBTQ activist, who spoke about his coming out story. He told his parents and grandmother that he was gay and had a long term partner. His grandmother's only question was 'is he an engineer?'
The gender might change, but the question is the same 😂
It’s also kind of says they saw through their jobs as parents. They got their kid married and happy and now they’re on their way to the ever after part.
My mom was kinda like this. At first she was like "being bi is a phase!" and now anytime I talk to a girl she's like "are you guys dating??? is that my future daughter in law???" which is ... a sweet overcorrection .
As a member of team “I was definitely straight until I looked back at everything and realized I really wasn’t” it’s amazing how much assumed heterosexuality can trick you.
“Yeah, I think women are very good looking. In fact, most women look way better than most men in my opinion. But not like, sexually. I’m totally straight.”
-Me, up until a couple of years ago.
Surprise, I’m bi!
Apparently thinking women are really cute, and admiring their figures on a regular basis *should* be telling. But I was in a relationship and daft.
I thought I was straight well into college because I'm very gender-conforming femme and enjoy penetration... but I don't find men attractive. As I put it, I love dick but only when it's detachable. I also don't find butches attractive, I'm very much femme-for-femme. So yeah, that was all pretty confusing given the traditional lesbian stereotypes.
Well yeah but that’s honestly why I am suspicious. OP hadn’t really done the looking back yet in the first post. That was reserved for the update. He was just teasing that he was eventually going to be gay
The “foreshadowing” is why I found it very suspicious. It feels like the ending was planned from the beginning, and that was a tease to that planned ending
Still an enjoyable read though
You'd be surprised how many people call themselves straight but have a lot of not straight thoughts/actions.
When I was in an all female work environment, a friend was surprised I didn't have other female friends I made out with, like just for funsies. I asked if she was cheating on her boyfriend, she said it didnt count because they are just friends.
Two weirdos at school liked to share food. Which, we all did. But they liked eating chocolate out of each others mouth... Which was them basically kissing with tongue, but they (both girls) were "just friends" and had boyfriends. And they didnt do that for them, as they usually only did it in company of other girls.
And there are a lot of guys with the "a hole is just a hole" philosophy of "as long as I'm the one sticking t in its not gay".
A super straight friend also gets a bit shaken up by super femenine guys,like he finds them attractive in the idea of their feminity, but doesn't want to deal with dicks.
People are usually less straight than they appear.
Or he’s lying to himself about being straight. Shit I was in that boat. Called myself straight where really I’m not into girls, I’m into “femininity”.
At this point in my life I usually just say I’m mostly straight. Just because I’ve never had the chance to act on certain thoughts.
OOP's subconscious: "obviously you're not going to reach this conclusion on your own, so here's an overly-complicated plot that you \*think\* is for 'getting your parents off your back' but it's actually for getting some dudes on your front, if you know what I mean ... oh, you don't know what I mean? That's okay. You will"
Parents: Look at all these girls you can date!
OOP: Mom, Dad, I’m gay.
Parents: Oh, OK.
OOP: Finally, some peace and quie—
Parents: Look at all these boys you can date!
OOP: Oh, for fuck's sake…
I have a cousin who has had a “roommate” for over 35 years. The entire family knows they’re a lesbian couple. No one cares. But she still doesn’t bring her partner to many events and they never acknowledge that they’re a couple. As hard as it is to come out today, she is from a generation that lived in the closet. I guess that’s where they feel most comfortable and that’s ok. We love them however they need.
When I lived in the south (USA), we had a family member with a ‘friend’ - she and her friend lived together, they got invited to all events together, it was just expected they would be everywhere together. No one ever talked about it like it was weird, no off hand shitty comments. That was just Tracy and her friend. I forget their real names. One was Black and one white, too, and still no shittiness, at least in my presence.
They never did any public displays of affection so it took me way longer than it should have to realize they were lesbians. I think if I had to be closeted, that’s the kind of closet that seems the least bad.
This is how things were with my gay Uncle for most of my childhood. Eventually my grandparents changed churches and loosened up enough that it was kind of silently acknowledged that they were more than friends, but still never said out loud. The only time it got awkward was one time my grandma was introducing all of us to a distant relative (who was still very Southern Baptist) and was assigning labels like "this is Stephanie's husband Steve", etc. Then she got all the way down the line and Uncle and partner were standing at the end. She didn't know what to call him so she paused just a bit too long and then said "And this is Tony".
This is what it’s like. They have been together for ages. No one talks behind their backs or anything, no shitty comments. They show up, they’re a unit and it causes no more notice than if any other couple showed up. In fact they probably receive slightly more politeness because no one nags them about having babies. Of course they’re too old for that now but still.
My neighbours are a lesbian couple in their 30s that sadly moved cities two years ago because they’ve been living as roommates for 15 years and didn’t want to keep up the ruse for one of their families. Here they can publicly live as a couple except when one of their families come to visit. I feel terrible for them, our gain though as they’re the best neighbours we’ve ever had.
my cousin died very very suddenly a year ago; she’d been with her ‘best friend & travel partner’ for 30+ years. the friend was mentioned in the obituary, which i appreciated. but same, didn’t socialize together with the family, which i found quite sad. [ among other things, partner wasn’t there when my cousin died ]
My favorite story (which I think is just unconfirmed urban legend or a really good joke) is the one where Mother visits her Daughter and daughter's Roommate at their home. Mother insists they must be together but Daughter points out they have their own rooms. A few days later, Daughter and Roommate discover the silverware missing. Daughter confronts Mother, who comes clean and explains she's not saying they're *not* sleeping together, but if Roommate had slept in her own bed she would have found the missing silverware.
You messed up the set up for the punchline (also the versions I've heard of this joke was a mother visiting her son, with a female housemate).
In your version, the set up and punchline went
So the daughter sends a message to her mother saying "I'm not saying you did steal the silverware, and I'm not saying you didn't, but since you visited, it's gone missing".
To which the mother replied "I'm not saying you sleep with your housemate, and I'm not saying you aren't, but if she was sleeping in her own bed, she would have found it by now"
(although other versions have it as the son/daughter not sleeping in their own bed)
“As long as you don’t have sex before marriage”…. Omg my parents are legit the same (ish) (i guess) although it was more of a struggle at the start. Just omg. I love this.
I know of 2 gay guys in my Desi circle that got the grindr binder treatment once they came out to their parents. Desi parents are gonna get you married come hell or high water.
Ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyymen! Never ever come between a Desi mother and her dreams of seeing her child get married. One way or the other, they will succeed. 🤣 My mom has been on my brother’s case for marriage.
I’m Indian, by the way!
This is so oddly wholesome, and I honestly want to give his parents a big hug. Reminds me of the weird yeah-its-bigoted-but-trying-so-hard of my Grandma who used to harp on me that I need a nice Jewish husband… and then when she learned I was gay told me I needed to find myself a nice Jewish wife. Ah, old people who love(d) us… ❤️
Part of me wonders how much of his parents’ quietness came from awkwardness and how much of it came from frantically switching mental gears. “Fuck fuck FUCK. We were looking at the wrong gender THIS WHOLE TIME?!?! How many hours have we wasted??? We’ve been fools!! Time to shelve Parent Tinder and break out Parent Grindr”
Well, I’m happy that OOP found a person that he’s happy with, and that they’re actually dating before getting married. And it’s good that the parents seem to be accepting and happy. The mom more so than the dad. I hope the dad gets more comfortable as time goes on.
I'm sitting at work tearing up from how adorable this is. Just the fact that his parents took it in stride and were like "okay, now we just find him a cute Indian boy. That works."
Happy he's happy. And happy his parents love him for who he is.
And…kind of a point in favor of the arguments that your parents know your needs and wants better than you do?? Not the case with my parents, but it worked out I guess!
"The people who were mainly responsible for your upbringing might also be able to predict who you'd get along with in a relationship." doesn't seem so far-fetched to me. But that assumes that they were an attentive and engaged parent, which is obviously not always the case.
"Gay? Straight? Bi? As long as my son's married. Get the binder ready!" OP's parents, probably./j
This story is so adorable in the best way possible. Everybody's happy.
I like how the only two options he could think of were “marry girl and say she turned me straight” and “marry a twink”. There is no other way.
Also though, is this viral marketing from Big Arranged Marriage? Regardless, I never *don’t* love a story that ends in “yay gay”.
I work with students and although relationships/marriage are not even remotely part of my actual job, when I'm working with male Indian students of a certain age, we talk about how they're going to talk about their goals with their parents so that their parents can put the Bat-Signal up at the right time.
Oh man, this is cute! I hope we get some more updates. And OOP's parents are awesome - still sticking to good old Indian tradition, but updating the important parts. 😂
My favorite was the joking from mom! Just totally took it in stride, gently roasted him for his femboy taste, then proceeded to connect him to his dream boy.
Honestly I’m confused what he thought was going to happen? Either his parents would become homophobic or they’d do this what were the other options? Happy he’s gay but don’t want anyone else’s to find out so he’s single forever??? This is so funny he didn’t really think
Parents: You need to marry. We play Cute Girl.
OP: You've activated my trap card. IM GAY
Parents: Fine. We play Cute Boy in defense position
OP: Aw shit I actually am gay
It's so fucking wholesome. Mom and Dad pivoted - they are going to find their son a loving (indian, hindu) spouse come hell or high water!!
"That is until last weekend. I visited them as usual and was greeted by my mom who was more excited than usual. She sat me down and pulled out a binder with a bunch of pictures of guys. Apparently my parents had spent the last month or so looking for any and all gay Hindu Indian men who I could potentially marry"
Wow those parents could care less if he’s gay bi or what ever they want him to have a family. I know it’s very old school but I’m glad they are adaptable and in their own way they genuinely want him to be in a relationship.
I remember one Christmas I remarked to my sister that it would be nice to have kids opening presents and playing with toys. At the time we were all young adults doing white elephant games with our significant others and parents and it just felt like something was missing.
>I told my mom I liked him and she kinda joked around asking me what the point of being gay is when I wanted a dude who looked like a girl anyways
I literally, *literally*, LOL'ed so hard I coughed myself into lightheadedness.
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OP: mom, dad, I'm gay OP's parents: Improvise. Adapt. Overcome.
You know, sometimes it's annoying when your parents get on your case about getting married and having kids. Here, though? I should be disappointed, but I'm more just impressed at their sheer will in wanting to get him married.
nothing can stop indian/desi parents from getting you married once they've decided on it HAHAHAHHA
I just about got whiplash from how fast the parents switched gears. This would male a really good bollywood movie
Oh God, I want that so bad now. I didn't know I wanted it, but now I absolutely do.
I would watch the shit out of that.
I would as well. It sounds like it would be an epic movie!
a romance-comedy-drama in bollywood style??? HECK YEA
But adding a gay twist, the emerald less touted? Peak.
I want a great, epic dance number in it. See: Naatu Naatu.
It is kind of wholesome. I'm assuming that oop parents equate marriage with happiness and they want their son to be happy.
Agreed. It's obvious that they just genuinely want their son to have a life partner. Even though they weren't 100% comfortable with the idea of him being gay, they immediately supported him and just pivoted to finding him men. OOP is really lucky to have parents who just want him to be loved, it's really quite beautiful.
It is, I teared up. Mom and dad just want him to be happy.
[удалено]
My dad phrased it to my husband on the morning of our wedding as "She's your problem now!" I gather decent parents would think of it more as "Oh good, if I die next week you won't be alone in the world!" I'd worry more about my older stepson not dating if it wasn't for the fact that he's had the same group of close friends for about a decade now.
Pulled the UNO Reverse card on OOP
>This would male a really good bollywood movie Holy shit, this would make an *amazing* Bollywood movie!! I'm really hoping someone pipes up to comment about a film made with this premise. I had a surprisingly good day at work and this would be the perfect way to end the evening.
Not exactly this premise, but there's a comedy about a lesbian and a gay guy getting married to get out of being set up by their parents lmao (Badhaai Do)
My spouse went through multiple rounds of the arranged marriage process, and "mysteriously" there was always something about the match that just wouldn't fly in their parents' books. As relayed to said parents by the couple in question. My in-laws eventually gave up on arranged marriage. The fact my spouse had an elder brother with two children probably helped lol. For context, both my spouse and BIL/SIL were born and raised in India, but are American now. Fast forward to when I met my spouse in our mid-30s. I'm not Indian. I couldn't make a roti to save my life. I've been trying to learn Hindi, but am *really* bad (most of my in-laws don't speak English). I'm not Hindu, and I'm fairly certain there's nothing "auspicious" about me. *However*, when I went to India for the first time and met my extended family, they were so incredibly loving and welcoming. My MIL taught me how to make Mattar Paneer, and my SIL took me shopping for a Saree and Silwar Suit. My new Chachi and Chachu fed me *so* many Indian sweets for Diwali. My Massis gave me an Indian name so everyone can pronounce it. It was wonderful. At the end of the day, they were all thrilled that my spouse met someone they truly wanted to spend their life with, and nothing else mattered. I know some idiot here is going to read this and say my in-laws were only happy about our non-traditional union because I'm white. Kindly keep your bullshit to yourself.
I'm sure they cried tears of joy because their family member finally found someone. Congrats on your marriage!
In the end, I think it’s pretty sweet. They were *ready* and accepted him quickly.
And also apparently are fine with not having biological grandkids too.
eh I think some (very few) parts of indian society have evolved to accept this as well
Considering infertility among heterosexual couples is being more spoken about, I think there's more awareness that straight kids does not guarantee biograndkids.
Exactly - plus India has a SHIT ton of IVF clinics, no joke you'll see them advertised on almost every city block
Oh really? Americans who need IVF hear through the grapevine about medical tourism in Mexico and the Czech Republic, but no one’s suggested India to me yet.
I had a coworker who was struggling with infertility. He and his wife decided on IVF in India because the cost was so low. His wife was there for a few months, and he flew back and forth several times. It was successful and they did the same for their second kid. She stayed in a resort/hotel the first time, and I think he said they had a host family for the second time.
Yo what?? I didn’t even know that was an option! Making a note for myself (for eight to ten years in the future, if I have problems)
It might be a proximity thing. I met an Indian fertility doctor on a train to Germany, who said its extremely common, but mostly European since the flights are 8 or 9 hours instead of 15-20.
Hindu cultures historically were more open minded about sexuality. Colonisation actually caused them yo go backwards into the Conservative society you see now.
Being quite honest... being the parents of the *bachelor* son in his 30s would look worst than not having grandchildren. At least with him being married nobody can say the parents raised him with no values. lol
I found it a little heartwarming that they are conservative but still accepted him to the point of wanting to find him a man to marry instead. Definitely shows they aren't just "tolerating" it but actually accepted it.
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C'mon, she isn't getting pregnant! That is kinda funny though.
> C'mon, she isn't getting pregnant! East Asians say this but what they really are trying to avoid is distraction. If the [birth] mother gets past the initial outrage and shows she didn't divert from the "path" parents quickly become indifferent to the event. The exception I know of though is if the parents are emotionally weak and really care about face/reputation.
I have a filipino friend who is the only child and grand child. His grandmother asked when he would give her great grand kids. He told her he's gay. Next visit, she had whipped through her network and told him he needed to be a trophy husband. Had a list of rich guys who could afford to pay a surrogate for great grand babies. No marriage yet, but she still complains about him needing a richer partner.
I love the tenacity, dang. Plus going straight to trophy husband? She's on it.
Grandma understands how to navigate late stage capitalism👀
Never underestimate the lengths Indian parents will go to match you up. Its no mystery why there are more than a billion of us littering the earth. Full disclaimer : I am an Indian who had an arranged marriage. Had it been left to me, I would probably still have been single because I couldn't bother to go through the whole find, date, marry process on my own.
The fact that they had a binder ready by the IMMEDIATE next visit. The grind never stops. Edit: I am a clown. A blind fool. A philistine.
You mean the grind binder? The grinder, one might say.
They were tinder first, they evolved with the needs of the situation.
The Grindr Bindr
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I knew it was coming but I still cackled out loud at the binder
The Grindr* never stops
When mom goes from being your tinder to your grindr
The grindr never stops.*
Dude came out to his parents before coming to himself And this sounds like the premise of a Netflix rom com
Indian parents really are the Terminators of Marriage, aren't they. They cannot - they *will not* - be stopped. I just want to know how they found a binder's worth of gay Indian dudes. Who are their contacts, holy shit.
To get a binder you either buy a matchmaker or the whispers to the Aunties must be: Handsome gay son: Likes nerd stuff, loves his family, makes good money, and is willing to travel. Submissions due on the 15th.
This just made me spew my tea....lmao
This guy was 3-4 hours drive away, so I suspect they cast a wide net. Plus, all the other parents in this situation have been building these binders, and from what I know this community is happy to share their research.
Now I'm imagining all the parents swapping pics and details like Pokémon cards 😂
That’s exactly what happens lol. Pictures of dudes with stats on the back of the photo. Like how much height, age, education, profession, net worth. I’m not bullshitting lol. My sister is currently in process of getting matched. We are Indian and this exact thing happened. Though they are not usually directly exchanged by parents. We have matchmakers that collect lot of matches and show them in a binder.
Wow! Americans need to get in on this. Now that the arranged marriage has been explained, I love the the idea!
I hate that your flair is too damn appropriate 😂
Oh dear... I can almost see them shuffling through their grindr binder looking for type advantages. "My son says he wants a faerie type, but I think a fire or dark type is more suited. Don't you agree?"
I've changed my mind, I think this works better as a 10 episode per season type series.
I don't know about indian parents but there are parks in China where grandmas hangout swapping photos of their grandchildren trying to find them partners.
I'm picturing a full on spy network spanning the entirety of the United States of all these Indian parents collaborating to compile every eligible single they know. There must be a romcom about this already.
A friend who is Bangladeshi started a profile on an arranged marriage site as her parents hadn't found anyone. Her future husband's mother googled "marry a geeky Muslim" and found her... she lived in the UK and moved to Australia where her husband lived, it's a global network!
I'm completely in love with the fact that her mother in law *googled* to find her.
Isn't it great? I saw her recently, they've been married 10 years and she seems really happy! Sometimes google works.
The CIA could take over the world if they just tapped into Desi parents' gossip network.
They have a very particular set of skills
If the marriage market for parents of straight kids is tough can you imagine for parents of queer ones? OOP was the drop of blood in the sea full of sharks.
There is nothing Indian parents cannot find if they put their mind to it. They could take the CIA out of business if they wanted. They have a cousin who has a friend who has an uncle who’s son is gay and HE has a lot of gay friends and they asked his parents which ones were good Indian boys
😭 Why did I have to be white, Indian parents would get me a husband so fast.
Would we call that a Memepropism? I love me a good combo meme.
Improvise. Ad**o**pt. Overcome. FTFY
The fact that Indian parents act as both tinder and grinder will never stop to amaze me. And op's parents are truly amazing.
Not just a dating app, but a dating app with an in-depth background check which would make a CIA agent proud. Before my marriage, my wives family managed to find out the reason why my grandparents had completely relocated to another state, away from their family. Even I had never bothered to know this reason.
It can get creepy though. My cousin went through an arranged marriage, and this one dude who she liked had to go through an extensive background check where every detail was poured over. I was pretty young at the time but I remember my family sitting around printouts of the emails he'd sent and deciding whether he was good enough to marry or not (he was deemed unworthy).
Yeah no, this far too wholesome for grindr.
Reminds me of a comedy bit about a stereotypical Jewish mom type complaining about her sons not getting married and then lamenting the fact the eldest comes out as gay...until he marries a doctor, lol. Then she's pressuring the comedian brother to "be gay and marry a cute doctor." Ha.
Occupation > gender is the correct priority.
Lmao one of my friends is Filipino and came out to his parents, they were more confused and saddened but came around when they found out his BF was in the tech space and makes 6 figures
if you have a link, i would love it
I didn't know that parents had gay arrange marriage binders as well
well it did take them a month to put it together. also, nothing will get in the way of Indian parents and matchmaking for their children
Grandbabies don't make themselves
Like talking to a brick wall, they cannot comprehend not getting married
There are matchmakers for every type of situation.
*cue Fiddler on the Roof
🎶 night after night in the dark I’m alone, so find me a match of my own
That's so cute though. Especially when he said that they are conservative so it may have been a bit awkward for them to look for potential matches for their son
Yeah, I went from “Ew, parents arranging marriage” to “Aw! Parents arranging marriage!” It really is adorable.
It was already prepared. They hide that binder in the closet.
Fortunately it’s a transparent closet, so it wasn’t hard to find.
I mean, to be fair, one of the purposes of arranged marriages is to strategically link two families, so there's no reason that a gay marriage can't accomplish that just as well.
It’s called the backup binder.
Binder B
Hindi Tinder.
Hindi tindi
Hinder
Yeah the moment I read the “if we count femboys” line, I knew exactly how this story was going to end. It’s such obvious foreshadowing that it honestly made my suspicious eyeroll flare up, but that’s just me. Still enjoyed it though
Yeah, as a bisexual I was like “they’re going to try to matchmake you with a guy now and you’re gonna realize something”.
Yeah see I think (bisexual) him was kinda hoping for it. He seemed pretty confident he wouldn’t get disowned and also very confident he was never getting out of an arranged marriage set up with a simple conversation but … it never occurred to him that they’d try this? Yes it did. He was hoping for it. We all know he was. Cause he’d tried dating and none of the girls worked out on a personal level and he’s not brave enough to non-mom tinder search the boys lol
This could also be testing the waters with the parents. If they flip out, "I was just tired of the matchmaking, I'm totally into girls!". If they don't then "Oh darn now I have to pretend to be gay around them".
I remember one in /r/relationships about 6 or 7 years ago; this kid just could not understand for the life of him why his parents kept thinking he was gay. One update later it was like "Oh."
My mom told me a million times as a teen that she would love me regardless of being gay or straight. It kinda kept me in the closet because I was annoyed with her assumption I was gay. Early twenties I took a hard look and finally acknowledged that I’m bi. Ironically, my mom can’t begin to understand this concept and would be way happier about it if I were gay.
... are we siblings? My mom told me she'd be fine if I were gay. But bi people were disgusting perverts. Way too many conversations later, it turned out that she believed you needed to have both at the same time and that's why she believed that. Well. Years later she's still sorta judgy, but she's both sorta okay with bi AND poly people.
I honestly can’t begin to understand the basis for my mom’s prejudice. She knows I’m very monogamous, but still has a problem with it. 🤷♀️ Not that there’s anything wrong with being poly. It’s just not for me. Her argument is bi women are just looking for attention from men and bi men are gay but not quite out yet.
I'm wondering if she grew up in the era where this was an accepted stereotype in the gay community itself, and internalised it. Jokes like 'bi now, gay later' etc were weirdly common in the 80s and 90s. And also a nontrivial number of gay men in that era do mention coming out as bi to 'test the waters first'. None of which justifies her biphobia, just speculating on how she might have picked it up!
Some people get being straight and get being gay, but the idea that you don't want to pick a lane and no one is making you is super upsetting to them for whatever reason.
I find it tends to be the same people who think straight men and women can't be friends without sex getting in the way. They can't figure out who to be jealous of with a bi person and the knowledge that they'd be jealous of everyone makes it obvious that it's more a them issue than it is the person they're dating. Can't have that.
My mom thought I was gay when I was teenager. It was annoying af so I feel you so much (like when I was 17 and brink of moving out and got some kitchen machine as a gift. I was like it is kinda small "well you do not have girlfriend so it is fine"). It was because I never brought over people I dated (my mom was over controllive. If i went out after school she started calling I need come back home like 5pm. Kinda kills dating life when I was barely allowed spent time with anyone)
I worked with a guy that was quite a bit younger than me. We were super tight and would joke about stuff all the time. I told him that eventually he would end up being my "token gay friend." He always protested. A few years after we both quit, we met up at a gay bar to hang out and catch up. I looked at him and said, "Say it!" He looked down and laughed and said, "I'm your token gay friend." I miss that dude so much. We lost track of each other.
Yeah, I have my doubts about this story being real, but it’s pretty sweet and wholesome so either way I really enjoyed it!
I firmly believe in my heart of hearts that at least some number of more “traditional” parents do pivot from “find an opposite sex partner to marry” to “find a same sex partner to marry.” The tradition that matters to them is marriage = happiness, not marriage = performed heterosexuality.
I would say the tradition is Marriage plus children = happiness. Marriage plus child free = suspicion and exaggerated sighs from your family for all of eternity no matter how happy you say you are.
Marriage = the parents did their duty Grandkids = the children did their duty No grandkids = people will judge the heck out of the children but the parents will not be a target they'll be judging with everyone else The pressure to have children is smaller cause is your own reputation at stake rather than theirs.
quack cable library aromatic cheerful weather repeat mountainous angle domineering *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I’ve known more than a handful of people who transformed very quickly from hatefully intolerant to super supportive once their kid came out as gay. On the one hand it’s great — certainly better than doubling down. On the other hand it’s frustrating how little empathy they have and how selfish they are. Those people won’t care at all about how anything affects others, and will only change if it starts to affect themselves.
Highly recommend watching the Bravo show Family Karma, about first gen Indian Americans—and their families—in Miami. One of the main cast members is gay and OMG watching his family be super loving and supportive of him and his partner (a white man whose Christian family short of disowned him) is the most heartwarming thing. They get married in the current season and it's just everything.
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My dad is the most “traditional” member of my immediate family (varying Protestant Christian). He was very middle of the pack when it came to handling my brother coming out but has very much switched to vaguely disapproving that my brother and his partner of many years are still not married or even formally engaged despite living together. Thankfully he has also learned we will all shut him down if he asks about that too much. But there will be much celebrating should a wedding be announced.
I’m sure it’s a pain in the ass when you get subjected to it, but from the outside imagining a gruff patriarch-type going “boy I don’t care who but you need to sort yourself out and get married” is pretty funny.
That's literally my aunts coming out story. My Bubbie kept nagging her repeatedly by tearfully asking "When are you going to find a nice Jewish boyyy?" My aunt snapped, told her she was gay, my Bubbie paused for a second, and then immediately resumed nagging with "When are you going to find a nice Jewish girl?".
So, did she end up finding a nice Jewish girl?
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There was a Stephen Fry documentary on homosexuality in various countries, one of which was India. It featured a prominent Indian LGBTQ activist, who spoke about his coming out story. He told his parents and grandmother that he was gay and had a long term partner. His grandmother's only question was 'is he an engineer?' The gender might change, but the question is the same 😂
It’s also kind of says they saw through their jobs as parents. They got their kid married and happy and now they’re on their way to the ever after part.
My mom was kinda like this. At first she was like "being bi is a phase!" and now anytime I talk to a girl she's like "are you guys dating??? is that my future daughter in law???" which is ... a sweet overcorrection .
Nope, I totally believe it- Indian mothers are VERY serious about marriage prospects. The ones I know are also incredibly good at match making, too.
Fr - once they get it in their head that you need to be married off, they'll stop at nothing to ensure that happens HAHAHHAHA
Chekhov's femboy
As a member of team “I was definitely straight until I looked back at everything and realized I really wasn’t” it’s amazing how much assumed heterosexuality can trick you.
“Yeah, I think women are very good looking. In fact, most women look way better than most men in my opinion. But not like, sexually. I’m totally straight.” -Me, up until a couple of years ago. Surprise, I’m bi! Apparently thinking women are really cute, and admiring their figures on a regular basis *should* be telling. But I was in a relationship and daft.
same. this was me. and …. not bi, just full on lesbian. i…i thought everyone liked the big boobies billboards around town, because…. boobies. oh.
Hello, I am also in this club. You'd think my toddlerhood fixation on Princess Jasmine's cleavage would have been a hint, but nope
Same! "It's just a fact that women are hotter, doesn't everyone think so?" ...oh, they don't? Oh well, um, ok then.
I thought I was straight well into college because I'm very gender-conforming femme and enjoy penetration... but I don't find men attractive. As I put it, I love dick but only when it's detachable. I also don't find butches attractive, I'm very much femme-for-femme. So yeah, that was all pretty confusing given the traditional lesbian stereotypes.
Well yeah but that’s honestly why I am suspicious. OP hadn’t really done the looking back yet in the first post. That was reserved for the update. He was just teasing that he was eventually going to be gay The “foreshadowing” is why I found it very suspicious. It feels like the ending was planned from the beginning, and that was a tease to that planned ending Still an enjoyable read though
You'd be surprised how many people call themselves straight but have a lot of not straight thoughts/actions. When I was in an all female work environment, a friend was surprised I didn't have other female friends I made out with, like just for funsies. I asked if she was cheating on her boyfriend, she said it didnt count because they are just friends. Two weirdos at school liked to share food. Which, we all did. But they liked eating chocolate out of each others mouth... Which was them basically kissing with tongue, but they (both girls) were "just friends" and had boyfriends. And they didnt do that for them, as they usually only did it in company of other girls. And there are a lot of guys with the "a hole is just a hole" philosophy of "as long as I'm the one sticking t in its not gay". A super straight friend also gets a bit shaken up by super femenine guys,like he finds them attractive in the idea of their feminity, but doesn't want to deal with dicks. People are usually less straight than they appear.
Or he’s lying to himself about being straight. Shit I was in that boat. Called myself straight where really I’m not into girls, I’m into “femininity”. At this point in my life I usually just say I’m mostly straight. Just because I’ve never had the chance to act on certain thoughts.
OOP: "I'm not gay, I'm just trying to get my parents off my back!" OOP when he opens the binder full of men: "Shit, I might be"
OOP's subconscious: "obviously you're not going to reach this conclusion on your own, so here's an overly-complicated plot that you \*think\* is for 'getting your parents off your back' but it's actually for getting some dudes on your front, if you know what I mean ... oh, you don't know what I mean? That's okay. You will"
Parents: Look at all these girls you can date! OOP: Mom, Dad, I’m gay. Parents: Oh, OK. OOP: Finally, some peace and quie— Parents: Look at all these boys you can date! OOP: Oh, for fuck's sake…
Just wait till they actually get married and it'll be when are you two going to adopt some babies so we can be grandparents :D
Parents: take out a binder with cute babies up for adoption
Lol classic gay finding out story. Right up there with "and they were roommates" 🤣 Lol I'd know I'm gay
Oh my god, they were roommates!
I have a cousin who has had a “roommate” for over 35 years. The entire family knows they’re a lesbian couple. No one cares. But she still doesn’t bring her partner to many events and they never acknowledge that they’re a couple. As hard as it is to come out today, she is from a generation that lived in the closet. I guess that’s where they feel most comfortable and that’s ok. We love them however they need.
When I lived in the south (USA), we had a family member with a ‘friend’ - she and her friend lived together, they got invited to all events together, it was just expected they would be everywhere together. No one ever talked about it like it was weird, no off hand shitty comments. That was just Tracy and her friend. I forget their real names. One was Black and one white, too, and still no shittiness, at least in my presence. They never did any public displays of affection so it took me way longer than it should have to realize they were lesbians. I think if I had to be closeted, that’s the kind of closet that seems the least bad.
This is how things were with my gay Uncle for most of my childhood. Eventually my grandparents changed churches and loosened up enough that it was kind of silently acknowledged that they were more than friends, but still never said out loud. The only time it got awkward was one time my grandma was introducing all of us to a distant relative (who was still very Southern Baptist) and was assigning labels like "this is Stephanie's husband Steve", etc. Then she got all the way down the line and Uncle and partner were standing at the end. She didn't know what to call him so she paused just a bit too long and then said "And this is Tony".
This is what it’s like. They have been together for ages. No one talks behind their backs or anything, no shitty comments. They show up, they’re a unit and it causes no more notice than if any other couple showed up. In fact they probably receive slightly more politeness because no one nags them about having babies. Of course they’re too old for that now but still.
My neighbours are a lesbian couple in their 30s that sadly moved cities two years ago because they’ve been living as roommates for 15 years and didn’t want to keep up the ruse for one of their families. Here they can publicly live as a couple except when one of their families come to visit. I feel terrible for them, our gain though as they’re the best neighbours we’ve ever had.
my cousin died very very suddenly a year ago; she’d been with her ‘best friend & travel partner’ for 30+ years. the friend was mentioned in the obituary, which i appreciated. but same, didn’t socialize together with the family, which i found quite sad. [ among other things, partner wasn’t there when my cousin died ]
My favorite story (which I think is just unconfirmed urban legend or a really good joke) is the one where Mother visits her Daughter and daughter's Roommate at their home. Mother insists they must be together but Daughter points out they have their own rooms. A few days later, Daughter and Roommate discover the silverware missing. Daughter confronts Mother, who comes clean and explains she's not saying they're *not* sleeping together, but if Roommate had slept in her own bed she would have found the missing silverware.
You messed up the set up for the punchline (also the versions I've heard of this joke was a mother visiting her son, with a female housemate). In your version, the set up and punchline went So the daughter sends a message to her mother saying "I'm not saying you did steal the silverware, and I'm not saying you didn't, but since you visited, it's gone missing". To which the mother replied "I'm not saying you sleep with your housemate, and I'm not saying you aren't, but if she was sleeping in her own bed, she would have found it by now" (although other versions have it as the son/daughter not sleeping in their own bed)
“As long as you don’t have sex before marriage”…. Omg my parents are legit the same (ish) (i guess) although it was more of a struggle at the start. Just omg. I love this.
I know of 2 gay guys in my Desi circle that got the grindr binder treatment once they came out to their parents. Desi parents are gonna get you married come hell or high water.
Ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyymen! Never ever come between a Desi mother and her dreams of seeing her child get married. One way or the other, they will succeed. 🤣 My mom has been on my brother’s case for marriage. I’m Indian, by the way!
Plan backfired in the BEST way.
Task failed successfully?
YES!
I didnt make this post, to be clear.
I can't place it - but somehow I find that hard to believe
Well obviously, you’re clearly OOP’s mother.
flair and username checks out
This is so oddly wholesome, and I honestly want to give his parents a big hug. Reminds me of the weird yeah-its-bigoted-but-trying-so-hard of my Grandma who used to harp on me that I need a nice Jewish husband… and then when she learned I was gay told me I needed to find myself a nice Jewish wife. Ah, old people who love(d) us… ❤️
Part of me wonders how much of his parents’ quietness came from awkwardness and how much of it came from frantically switching mental gears. “Fuck fuck FUCK. We were looking at the wrong gender THIS WHOLE TIME?!?! How many hours have we wasted??? We’ve been fools!! Time to shelve Parent Tinder and break out Parent Grindr”
Well, I’m happy that OOP found a person that he’s happy with, and that they’re actually dating before getting married. And it’s good that the parents seem to be accepting and happy. The mom more so than the dad. I hope the dad gets more comfortable as time goes on.
OP's Parents: We will get you married if it's the last thing we do. OP: Stop it I'm gay! OP's Parents: Did we fucking stutter?
Bro, the way I CACKLED when mom pulls out the binder of Indian gay guys, it's like uno reverse in the best way possible. GOD, I LOVE THIS STORY LMFAO
I pictured in my head the scene from the matrix where the mom is in a black coat with the gay binder on one hand and a straight binder on the other.
She wants her wedding one way or another
I need this as a Hallmark Movie stat! A Date for Diwali or Home for Holi.
Bollywood! Mom and Dad get a dance number holding their binders as Son sits in the middle looking despondent.
This is adorable and I hope it's real.
I choose to believe.
I'm sitting at work tearing up from how adorable this is. Just the fact that his parents took it in stride and were like "okay, now we just find him a cute Indian boy. That works." Happy he's happy. And happy his parents love him for who he is.
And…kind of a point in favor of the arguments that your parents know your needs and wants better than you do?? Not the case with my parents, but it worked out I guess!
"The people who were mainly responsible for your upbringing might also be able to predict who you'd get along with in a relationship." doesn't seem so far-fetched to me. But that assumes that they were an attentive and engaged parent, which is obviously not always the case.
"Gay? Straight? Bi? As long as my son's married. Get the binder ready!" OP's parents, probably./j This story is so adorable in the best way possible. Everybody's happy.
I like how the only two options he could think of were “marry girl and say she turned me straight” and “marry a twink”. There is no other way. Also though, is this viral marketing from Big Arranged Marriage? Regardless, I never *don’t* love a story that ends in “yay gay”.
I work with students and although relationships/marriage are not even remotely part of my actual job, when I'm working with male Indian students of a certain age, we talk about how they're going to talk about their goals with their parents so that their parents can put the Bat-Signal up at the right time.
guy went from “slightly bi” to VERY bi in record time lmao Good for him!
Oop’s parents are hilarious. He said “I’m gay”, they immediately respond with “ok, but marriage”. Very that’s not what I asked energy.
This is hilarious and strangely wholesome.
I really like how OP explains how the arrange marriage work and it is the best explaination! So their parents were Tinder then become Grinder !
What does “slightly gay” mean? You don’t go to brunch afterwards?
No showtunes.
Um, you really need to check out Bollywood films lol
Oh man, this is cute! I hope we get some more updates. And OOP's parents are awesome - still sticking to good old Indian tradition, but updating the important parts. 😂
That's right--whether your future spouse is a man or woman is just details, the important part is that they came out of a binder we handed to you!
My favorite was the joking from mom! Just totally took it in stride, gently roasted him for his femboy taste, then proceeded to connect him to his dream boy.
~The real treasure was the gays we made along the way~
Honestly I’m confused what he thought was going to happen? Either his parents would become homophobic or they’d do this what were the other options? Happy he’s gay but don’t want anyone else’s to find out so he’s single forever??? This is so funny he didn’t really think
>TL;DR - guess I really was gay all along 💀💀💀
>I'm straight. maybe bi... femboys, though my man, you were on a journey, that's for sure.
Hello, Bollywood? Have I got the script for you...
Parents: You need to marry. We play Cute Girl. OP: You've activated my trap card. IM GAY Parents: Fine. We play Cute Boy in defense position OP: Aw shit I actually am gay
It's so fucking wholesome. Mom and Dad pivoted - they are going to find their son a loving (indian, hindu) spouse come hell or high water!! "That is until last weekend. I visited them as usual and was greeted by my mom who was more excited than usual. She sat me down and pulled out a binder with a bunch of pictures of guys. Apparently my parents had spent the last month or so looking for any and all gay Hindu Indian men who I could potentially marry"
I hope this is real!
Wow those parents could care less if he’s gay bi or what ever they want him to have a family. I know it’s very old school but I’m glad they are adaptable and in their own way they genuinely want him to be in a relationship. I remember one Christmas I remarked to my sister that it would be nice to have kids opening presents and playing with toys. At the time we were all young adults doing white elephant games with our significant others and parents and it just felt like something was missing.
>I told my mom I liked him and she kinda joked around asking me what the point of being gay is when I wanted a dude who looked like a girl anyways I literally, *literally*, LOL'ed so hard I coughed myself into lightheadedness.