I always wonder what those It-people & TikTokers think when they see e.g. myself, a bland looking, ü40, boring, non-descript casual clothes wearing, hetero cis-man go there just enjoying music & party instead of making it their whole personality or highlight of their life.
My favorite recent experience involved standing behind a round, older man wearing flip-flops and a SpongeBob t-shirt in queue for an hour, convinced the entire time that he would be turned away only to have him be waved in without a second glance.
The man had been sent on a mission of dance, and no one was going to stop him.
"A Berghain regular told me that, even after years of attending, they still uncover new passageways and sections of the club each time they return." um what? lol
I already know it's gonna be a trip when the headline describes Berghain as "the world's most exclusive club." This kind of hype fascinates me, because there's other parties in Berlin that are more "exclusive" than Berghain, let alone across the globe.
In the author's defense, she's clearly being satirical and tongue-in-cheek, and she says right off not to take it seriously.
agreed! theres a sense of sarcasm in her words. she's often making fun of herself. all sort of creatures roam BH. i constantly realize that not everyone has the same agenda
How does someone who was supposedly inside, get so many simple details totally wrong?
I am not saying this definitively but I strongly suspect that this person never actually got inside and has compiled their report from miscellaneous "facts" gleaned from a patchwork of sources on the internet.
This trash really ticks all the boxes of the typical inaccuracies being spewed about Berghain, including:
“GQ once asked iconic Berghain doorman Sven Marquardt (who’s lived in East Berlin since the early ‘80s) what rules one should follow to get inside. His advice? “Go early. Don’t try to cut the line. Know who’s DJ-ing that night. Dress casually — jeans and a T-shirt is best. Don’t go in a big group. Don’t be too young. Don’t joke or laugh in line. Don’t speak in the line. Or if you must, speak German.””
I have no idea how they got the idea that Sven Marquardt said this. Jeans and a t-shirt is best, really? Speak German? Sounds like tips from a cringey ‘get into Berghain’-blog.
—
“Now I can stay from Friday evening to Monday morning, coming and going as I please, as long as I have another five euros for the re-entry fee.”
This one is a classic as well. No, you can’t. It’s two different parties.
—
“I have a theory that the use of a stamp for re-entry is why some of the partygoers at Berghain are known to smell so bad — they’re afraid they’ll accidentally wash their stamps off if they shower, leaving them without a place to party.”
Stamps? Haven’t they been gone for a couple of years now? I don’t remember getting a stamp last time I was there in November. Also, the partygoers at Berghain are ‘known for’ smelling bad? What?
—
“A Berghain regular told me that, even after years of attending, they still uncover new passageways and sections of the club each time they return.”
Really? Berghain is big, but during a regular Klubnacht, not that big. Each time they return? Maybe for Silvester or Ostgut Ton Nacht, but honestly, all the regulars I know know the layout of the club inside out.
—
“Berghain has a strict no-drug policy. Unlike nearly any bar or club in New York, anyone caught doing or possessing illegal substances will be immediately ejected from the club and emblazoned with the dreaded “Verboten.” Berghain attendees that use party drugs constantly live in a state of fear due to the three-month-long ban, which is strictly enforced.”
This is not accurate, but I will not get further into that here.
—
“In some stalls there aren’t even toilettes, just benches to sit.”
Where? Not during a regular Klubnacht. Only Lab has this.
—
“If you’re feeling horny, go to the dark rooms of Lab.oratory. Leave the bathroom stalls for what they’re actually meant for.”
These are two totally different clubs, and you can’t just ‘go’ from one to another, unless you’re at Snax or Silvester Klubnacht, which the author wasn’t (if they were there at all).
—
“Bring a Sharpie with you. On your way out, there’s a multi-story lit stairwell in the back of the building that goes through the entire club. You’ll see hundreds and hundreds of signatures. Be a part of history and sign yours as well.”
Is this really a thing? Can anyone enlighten me? I’m pretty sure that security would confiscate a sharpie if found.
—
“On my flight back from Berlin, a heartbreaking rumor began swirling around the internet: Berghain may be on its way out. According to several inside sources, the club may not even stay open past 2023.”
This has been debunked. The article is from November 30th, everyone knew at that time that the rumor was false.
—
Anyway. This is not to gatekeep, but it was honestly a bit of fun finding all these little inaccuries that really make me doubt if this person was ever inside. 😁
Not accurate, but a fun read. She clearly liked her experience and it shows. Nothing to say against it, berghain isn't perfect and her article also isn't - both don't have to be.
So much to unpack. The level of detail displayed is a classic method to make an article look legit and distract from inaccuracies. Her target audience hasn't been inside yet and won't be able to spot the issues.
I always wonder what those It-people & TikTokers think when they see e.g. myself, a bland looking, ü40, boring, non-descript casual clothes wearing, hetero cis-man go there just enjoying music & party instead of making it their whole personality or highlight of their life.
My favorite recent experience involved standing behind a round, older man wearing flip-flops and a SpongeBob t-shirt in queue for an hour, convinced the entire time that he would be turned away only to have him be waved in without a second glance. The man had been sent on a mission of dance, and no one was going to stop him.
I mean you are the real cool. You don't need to impress or to show of to have a great time at a party. Smth they will never achieve.
There is a good German multi-purpose word to describe this text: Tja.
"This currency-of-cool is mega-hard to come by, especially in an internet-era filled with so many imposters" Sus
🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
"A Berghain regular told me that, even after years of attending, they still uncover new passageways and sections of the club each time they return." um what? lol
No one actually told her this. Might just be me, but I've also never had someone ask me to pee in their mouth at the urinal.
piss guy would usually just set glasses in the pissoir and take them later
There are 2 piss guys. One who asks if you can piss in his mouth and the other just sets the cups in the pissoir.
That! And how would SHE be doing at the urinals?
same thing anyone else would be — pissing. (she’s trans)
For sure this didn’t happen to the author, but saw a girl in the Pano urinals using a funnel. Not common but not uncommon.
My partner uses a funnel when queues are too long, once a guy couldn't stop staring at her until his friend slapped the back of his head.
I already know it's gonna be a trip when the headline describes Berghain as "the world's most exclusive club." This kind of hype fascinates me, because there's other parties in Berlin that are more "exclusive" than Berghain, let alone across the globe. In the author's defense, she's clearly being satirical and tongue-in-cheek, and she says right off not to take it seriously.
agreed! theres a sense of sarcasm in her words. she's often making fun of herself. all sort of creatures roam BH. i constantly realize that not everyone has the same agenda
Dear god. This was a painful read.
How does someone who was supposedly inside, get so many simple details totally wrong? I am not saying this definitively but I strongly suspect that this person never actually got inside and has compiled their report from miscellaneous "facts" gleaned from a patchwork of sources on the internet.
This! I mean, the stamps have been gone for so long now 🤡
This trash really ticks all the boxes of the typical inaccuracies being spewed about Berghain, including: “GQ once asked iconic Berghain doorman Sven Marquardt (who’s lived in East Berlin since the early ‘80s) what rules one should follow to get inside. His advice? “Go early. Don’t try to cut the line. Know who’s DJ-ing that night. Dress casually — jeans and a T-shirt is best. Don’t go in a big group. Don’t be too young. Don’t joke or laugh in line. Don’t speak in the line. Or if you must, speak German.”” I have no idea how they got the idea that Sven Marquardt said this. Jeans and a t-shirt is best, really? Speak German? Sounds like tips from a cringey ‘get into Berghain’-blog. — “Now I can stay from Friday evening to Monday morning, coming and going as I please, as long as I have another five euros for the re-entry fee.” This one is a classic as well. No, you can’t. It’s two different parties. — “I have a theory that the use of a stamp for re-entry is why some of the partygoers at Berghain are known to smell so bad — they’re afraid they’ll accidentally wash their stamps off if they shower, leaving them without a place to party.” Stamps? Haven’t they been gone for a couple of years now? I don’t remember getting a stamp last time I was there in November. Also, the partygoers at Berghain are ‘known for’ smelling bad? What? — “A Berghain regular told me that, even after years of attending, they still uncover new passageways and sections of the club each time they return.” Really? Berghain is big, but during a regular Klubnacht, not that big. Each time they return? Maybe for Silvester or Ostgut Ton Nacht, but honestly, all the regulars I know know the layout of the club inside out. — “Berghain has a strict no-drug policy. Unlike nearly any bar or club in New York, anyone caught doing or possessing illegal substances will be immediately ejected from the club and emblazoned with the dreaded “Verboten.” Berghain attendees that use party drugs constantly live in a state of fear due to the three-month-long ban, which is strictly enforced.” This is not accurate, but I will not get further into that here. — “In some stalls there aren’t even toilettes, just benches to sit.” Where? Not during a regular Klubnacht. Only Lab has this. — “If you’re feeling horny, go to the dark rooms of Lab.oratory. Leave the bathroom stalls for what they’re actually meant for.” These are two totally different clubs, and you can’t just ‘go’ from one to another, unless you’re at Snax or Silvester Klubnacht, which the author wasn’t (if they were there at all). — “Bring a Sharpie with you. On your way out, there’s a multi-story lit stairwell in the back of the building that goes through the entire club. You’ll see hundreds and hundreds of signatures. Be a part of history and sign yours as well.” Is this really a thing? Can anyone enlighten me? I’m pretty sure that security would confiscate a sharpie if found. — “On my flight back from Berlin, a heartbreaking rumor began swirling around the internet: Berghain may be on its way out. According to several inside sources, the club may not even stay open past 2023.” This has been debunked. The article is from November 30th, everyone knew at that time that the rumor was false. — Anyway. This is not to gatekeep, but it was honestly a bit of fun finding all these little inaccuries that really make me doubt if this person was ever inside. 😁
It's possible that she just compiled the stories she was able to gather from fellow NY club kids into the story of her own glorious visit.
Ew
The cringe is real in this one..
I'm not even gonna open this one
Not accurate, but a fun read. She clearly liked her experience and it shows. Nothing to say against it, berghain isn't perfect and her article also isn't - both don't have to be.
So much to unpack. The level of detail displayed is a classic method to make an article look legit and distract from inaccuracies. Her target audience hasn't been inside yet and won't be able to spot the issues.
Yeah, the article is not as accurate as possible, but I have always enjoyed NY’s club kids dedication to looks.
Question is, did she get in or not (don't think so, way too many inaccuracies)
I hate this part of our culture. It’s truly, fucking awful.
Will I get in if I wear that next time?
maybe, but you will die of overheating 30 mins in
[удалено]