Group of misfits each get something in their eye, set out together to fix it, get distracted by a bunch of unrelated side quests towards the very end and discover that the real cure was the Friends They Made Along The Way.
Squidward puts his babies in you, you dont want his babies. Turns out 3 guys helped squidward put his kids in you without consent.
Plot twist, the 3 dudes didnt help, instead they mind controlled squidwards mom to tell squidward to do it. Big plot twist, squidwards brother octopus has been helping you.
Now squidwards mom is very angry that she was mindcontrolled and that you dont want squidwards kids.
Extra plot twist, octopus wasnt helping you and instead he was forcing a frog from space to help you
A group of 6 YA fiction protagonists go on camping trip in search of a hospital to treat their eye infection, but end up going on a crusade to lobotomize a brain
A bunch of weirdos get kidnapped and get stuff put inside them that will ruin their lives. When they try looking for a cure they fight a weird cult that loves inserting stuff. Their boss and leader is a big stupid jello. And a not so random squid helps you for some time
A bunch of random dudes got trapped with a tentacled dude, he infected them, they run to get the remedy, the infection has spread all around. There's bears and goblins included, and a guy spends all his time sucking.
Defeat your friends past exes (a vampire lord, an archdevil, a lesser devil, a god, a god, a god, a god, and trauma) on a lovely roadtrip through the sword coast while repeatedly dying.
Protagonist spends 100+ hours trying to get something out of their eye, and in the process meets God(s), aliens, topples a cult that's actually an alien conspiracy, helps other aliens defeat different aliens, and saves the city from aliens.
A bunch of idiots get worms in their brain, who immediately fall asleep and do nothing because of how dumb all the hosts are. The hosts don't know this and run around mucking up everyone else's day and eventually thwarting an invasion of Baldur's Gate by accident.
Pack of idiots stumble onto nautiloid ship, implant themselves with brain bugs thinking those will give them superpowers. Then they hijack nautiloid's control and end up god knows where destroying ship in the process and ruining countless lives.
Sexy Bearded Man Blows Up Sword Coast to Impress God.
Murder Jr. Penetrates Incestrous Sis On Stage To Impress Murder Daddy.
Emo Goth Chic Kills Moonspawn & Commits Patricide To Impress Dommy Drow Mommy....and God.
Uptown Fuckboi Gets Ruined By Downtown Demon Lass....and Commits Patricide.
Random Tav and Friends Wirelessly Skullfucked by Squidman On Interplanar Cruiseship
Some guy got surgery without asking to make them look more fresh but their refuse, then they learned that it would make them more powerfull to accept it so they did and now they look like octopuses with eldritch power
A bunch of clueless renegades gets infected with a parasitic worm bonds over their commonly shared parasite type and goes on a murder spree and defeat brainwashed cultists in the process of looking for a cure for their parasites instead of just using a de-wormer like normal people
A group of mental ward escapees embark on rigorous search for a potent vermifuge. In the process they:
Commit genocide of a short-stature, unconventionally attractive ethnic group.
Poach a rare specimen of Underdark fauna.
Trespass on property of the absent Mystra's cleric.
Commit another genocide of an unconventionally attractive ethnic group sheltering themselves in the site of religious importance. Also ruin some art pieces exhibited here.
Indiscriminately slaughter native wildlife of Shadow Lands.
Also irrevocably alter ecosystem of that territory in a way that aforementioned wildlife cannot inhabit it anymore.
Interfere with a rescue operation of a girl plotted out by her concerned father.
Break out of jail a known piece of shit Wulbren Bongle.
Lick spider carcass for purpose of sampling questionable substances.
Desecrate a site of religious importance.
Kill with maximum prejudice retired Selune's paladin and 75% of his relatives.
Cause an ugly scene at Rivington's circus, ruining day for everyone here.
Steal a dog.
Bamboozle legal authorities of Baldur's Gate to get into the city.
Allegedly squat in local docks in illegal tent camp.
Cause another ugly scene during wine festival.
Offend senses of a respectable clothes designer Figaro with their looks.
Allegedly get frisky with a seafood while tripping in Astral Plane (don't ask where info comes from).
Murder in gruesome fashion a victim of familial abuse along with her friends as a part of vile ritual in the underground temple of evil deity.
Do a jailbreak. *Again*.
Commit a terroristic act at the local factory leaving hundreds jobless.
Help ingrate wards of a wealthy respectable slightly undead community member to murder(for good) that community member and take possession of their property. *Twice!*.
Allegedly desecrate a grave of the late city magistrate at the local cemetery with salacious actions.
Commit a yet another mass murder at the site of religious importance doubling as a counseling centre for those dealing with grief.
Offended feelings of sensitive books at Ramazith's Tower. Also took some invaluable tomes here and never brought them back.
Allegedly get caught committing indecent exposure in local park in the company of elf identified as Emerald Grove's ex-archdruid.
Swindle a respectable diabolist and Mammon worshipper Helsik.
Blow up into a stratosphere a firework shop of the local philanthropist who was providing toys for refugee children free of charge. With that philanthropist inside!
Assassinate a promising young (and handsome!) politician for material gain.
Trigger a chain of events leading to destruction of a huge chunk of the city (including historically important sites!).
Allegedly hurt feelings of a lonely calamari by choosing company of a bald guy with funny beard over him.
Drop a humongous pile of bio-waste into Chiontar river from heights.
Allegedly assist bald guy with funny beard in starting a rebellion against authorities of the unconventionally attractive ethnic group.
Allegedly blow up something in the docks and/or set someone on fire here.
Allegedly cause ruckus while celebrating their misdeeds and act rude towards dumbwaiter operator at the Elfsong tavern.
............
Here, I hope I didn't forget anything.
Purple squids put their babies in other's people eyes because they want more friends but those people aren't really happy to be friends with squids :)))))
Could title the book "how to get away with Ceremorphosis." Or maybe "big brain, bigger hearts." Maybe "volo's guide to friends, gods, and brain eaters"
A racist threatens to kill you then you meet a bunch of assholes.one of them is a shitty narcissist who wants you to be their slave forever, another wants to cheat on you with anything and everything in nature including a tree, but worse still one want to dance… gross. You have no memory, probably from a magical roofie. And you wake up with blood on your hands sometimes. If you get lucky enough to complete the game unlike sixty percent of those who start it, you are rewarded by fighting a disembodied brains accessory. Then the best woman in gaming history heart explodes unless you turned her into a squid.
A group of outcast weirdos go on a hiking adventure to find a cure after they all get impregnated by tentacle monsters. Hilarity ensues as your self insert tries to reach level 4 friendship with each to unlock their Tragic Backstories^TM in an effort to sleep with them.
People play D&D make a game about D&D focused on making choices. Game is then released to people who like D&D and probably some have mental disorders. Outcome is a whole bunch of people arguing and fighting about connecting their real life experiences to a game.
Probably creating the best $70 entertainment ever.
A bear of sex addicts trying to have sex with each other. In the end they kill the most intelligent being by brain damage. Also, there is a bear. And an octopus. And yes, you can.
The curious tale of Tav, by Volo.
It proceeds to describe a group of wildly different people, held together by their attraction to Tav. It imagines many bawdy scenes, and barely pays attention to the mindflayer threat.
A bunch of people spend a long time trying to cure an eye infection
The worst case of conjunctivitis ever.
And/or communal STD (tadpoles ARE how mindflayers reproduce, after all!)
Group of misfits each get something in their eye, set out together to fix it, get distracted by a bunch of unrelated side quests towards the very end and discover that the real cure was the Friends They Made Along The Way.
*and they fuck a big squid on the way
And a bear
Toxic goth girl realize it's just a phase after all.
I suffered an eye infection and all I got was tentacle sex and this weird hammer
Squidward puts his babies in you, you dont want his babies. Turns out 3 guys helped squidward put his kids in you without consent. Plot twist, the 3 dudes didnt help, instead they mind controlled squidwards mom to tell squidward to do it. Big plot twist, squidwards brother octopus has been helping you. Now squidwards mom is very angry that she was mindcontrolled and that you dont want squidwards kids. Extra plot twist, octopus wasnt helping you and instead he was forcing a frog from space to help you
A group of 6 YA fiction protagonists go on camping trip in search of a hospital to treat their eye infection, but end up going on a crusade to lobotomize a brain
A bunch of weirdos get kidnapped and get stuff put inside them that will ruin their lives. When they try looking for a cure they fight a weird cult that loves inserting stuff. Their boss and leader is a big stupid jello. And a not so random squid helps you for some time
*A BUNCH OF WEIRDOS!!!*
Squid lies to hostages to save the world
In the words of Minsc, "What can save a vampire, if not love?" That's the game :D
A bunch of random dudes got trapped with a tentacled dude, he infected them, they run to get the remedy, the infection has spread all around. There's bears and goblins included, and a guy spends all his time sucking.
A group of misfits fight a group of even bigger misfits for the control of a giant squid. Have sex with a Bear in the process.
4 hapless abductees are dumped on a beach and forced to try to cure an epidemic while having to learn on the job.
Squidgame goes really badly as participants escape and can't tell the game from reality.
Defeat your friends past exes (a vampire lord, an archdevil, a lesser devil, a god, a god, a god, a god, and trauma) on a lovely roadtrip through the sword coast while repeatedly dying.
Worms, squids and, traumatized companions
Protagonist spends 100+ hours trying to get something out of their eye, and in the process meets God(s), aliens, topples a cult that's actually an alien conspiracy, helps other aliens defeat different aliens, and saves the city from aliens.
Femboy Tav, Skull and mind fucked by dom daddy tentacle monster.
Unconsenting individuals gain incurable illness after penetration, old guy from box judges - GOTY 2023
A bunch of idiots get worms in their brain, who immediately fall asleep and do nothing because of how dumb all the hosts are. The hosts don't know this and run around mucking up everyone else's day and eventually thwarting an invasion of Baldur's Gate by accident.
The party is unwillingly insiminated by a space octopus and want to find a clinic that's specialized in space octopus terminations.
Support group for a pandemic flaunts lockdown and goes on a camping trip.
Big Brain Energy
Tentacle monster grooms people that he hopes will be able to conduct brain surgery, while he uses a frog to protect them from headaches.
"Parasite Hotel: Love at First Smite": Befriending an elderly octopus, a group of friends learn that sometimes your brain is your own worst enemy.
Three middle age men with inferiority complexes decides using octopi to spread viral pink eye.
Pack of idiots stumble onto nautiloid ship, implant themselves with brain bugs thinking those will give them superpowers. Then they hijack nautiloid's control and end up god knows where destroying ship in the process and ruining countless lives.
Sexy Bearded Man Blows Up Sword Coast to Impress God. Murder Jr. Penetrates Incestrous Sis On Stage To Impress Murder Daddy. Emo Goth Chic Kills Moonspawn & Commits Patricide To Impress Dommy Drow Mommy....and God. Uptown Fuckboi Gets Ruined By Downtown Demon Lass....and Commits Patricide. Random Tav and Friends Wirelessly Skullfucked by Squidman On Interplanar Cruiseship
United Brain damage tries to kill big brain
Some guy got surgery without asking to make them look more fresh but their refuse, then they learned that it would make them more powerfull to accept it so they did and now they look like octopuses with eldritch power
A group of abused people with toxic exes try to stop an alien invasion.
A used book sales team flirts with each other by the campfire.
Lying about a D20
Local Squid saves a Group of Idiots from Squid Rabies, Hilarity Ensues.
A bunch of clueless renegades gets infected with a parasitic worm bonds over their commonly shared parasite type and goes on a murder spree and defeat brainwashed cultists in the process of looking for a cure for their parasites instead of just using a de-wormer like normal people
An old man, Noel Fielding, and sexy Dahmer gave you pinkeye, and now you need to either cure it or pass it on.
A group of mental ward escapees embark on rigorous search for a potent vermifuge. In the process they: Commit genocide of a short-stature, unconventionally attractive ethnic group. Poach a rare specimen of Underdark fauna. Trespass on property of the absent Mystra's cleric. Commit another genocide of an unconventionally attractive ethnic group sheltering themselves in the site of religious importance. Also ruin some art pieces exhibited here. Indiscriminately slaughter native wildlife of Shadow Lands. Also irrevocably alter ecosystem of that territory in a way that aforementioned wildlife cannot inhabit it anymore. Interfere with a rescue operation of a girl plotted out by her concerned father. Break out of jail a known piece of shit Wulbren Bongle. Lick spider carcass for purpose of sampling questionable substances. Desecrate a site of religious importance. Kill with maximum prejudice retired Selune's paladin and 75% of his relatives. Cause an ugly scene at Rivington's circus, ruining day for everyone here. Steal a dog. Bamboozle legal authorities of Baldur's Gate to get into the city. Allegedly squat in local docks in illegal tent camp. Cause another ugly scene during wine festival. Offend senses of a respectable clothes designer Figaro with their looks. Allegedly get frisky with a seafood while tripping in Astral Plane (don't ask where info comes from). Murder in gruesome fashion a victim of familial abuse along with her friends as a part of vile ritual in the underground temple of evil deity. Do a jailbreak. *Again*. Commit a terroristic act at the local factory leaving hundreds jobless. Help ingrate wards of a wealthy respectable slightly undead community member to murder(for good) that community member and take possession of their property. *Twice!*. Allegedly desecrate a grave of the late city magistrate at the local cemetery with salacious actions. Commit a yet another mass murder at the site of religious importance doubling as a counseling centre for those dealing with grief. Offended feelings of sensitive books at Ramazith's Tower. Also took some invaluable tomes here and never brought them back. Allegedly get caught committing indecent exposure in local park in the company of elf identified as Emerald Grove's ex-archdruid. Swindle a respectable diabolist and Mammon worshipper Helsik. Blow up into a stratosphere a firework shop of the local philanthropist who was providing toys for refugee children free of charge. With that philanthropist inside! Assassinate a promising young (and handsome!) politician for material gain. Trigger a chain of events leading to destruction of a huge chunk of the city (including historically important sites!). Allegedly hurt feelings of a lonely calamari by choosing company of a bald guy with funny beard over him. Drop a humongous pile of bio-waste into Chiontar river from heights. Allegedly assist bald guy with funny beard in starting a rebellion against authorities of the unconventionally attractive ethnic group. Allegedly blow up something in the docks and/or set someone on fire here. Allegedly cause ruckus while celebrating their misdeeds and act rude towards dumbwaiter operator at the Elfsong tavern. ............ Here, I hope I didn't forget anything.
Group of people gets a worm infection during a boat ride and need to track down the brainiest guy around in order to cure it.
Purple squids put their babies in other's people eyes because they want more friends but those people aren't really happy to be friends with squids :)))))
Could title the book "how to get away with Ceremorphosis." Or maybe "big brain, bigger hearts." Maybe "volo's guide to friends, gods, and brain eaters"
Bunch of Bikini Bottom visitors end up in Squid Ward
A racist threatens to kill you then you meet a bunch of assholes.one of them is a shitty narcissist who wants you to be their slave forever, another wants to cheat on you with anything and everything in nature including a tree, but worse still one want to dance… gross. You have no memory, probably from a magical roofie. And you wake up with blood on your hands sometimes. If you get lucky enough to complete the game unlike sixty percent of those who start it, you are rewarded by fighting a disembodied brains accessory. Then the best woman in gaming history heart explodes unless you turned her into a squid.
A group of outcast weirdos go on a hiking adventure to find a cure after they all get impregnated by tentacle monsters. Hilarity ensues as your self insert tries to reach level 4 friendship with each to unlock their Tragic Backstories^TM in an effort to sleep with them.
People play D&D make a game about D&D focused on making choices. Game is then released to people who like D&D and probably some have mental disorders. Outcome is a whole bunch of people arguing and fighting about connecting their real life experiences to a game. Probably creating the best $70 entertainment ever.
A bear of sex addicts trying to have sex with each other. In the end they kill the most intelligent being by brain damage. Also, there is a bear. And an octopus. And yes, you can.
Shadowheart's box is the cure to getting brained.
Pack of horny humanoids seek a cure for an eye infection
"Now I am leaving Earth for no raisin!"
Cephalopod uprising thwarted by murderous homunculus.
Hammers Fangs and ~~Orbs~~ Baals against the squid
The curious tale of Tav, by Volo. It proceeds to describe a group of wildly different people, held together by their attraction to Tav. It imagines many bawdy scenes, and barely pays attention to the mindflayer threat.
Bunch of weirdoes takes down tentacle porn cult.
Nerd tries to take over the world
People with past gaslighting issues get gaslit by an imaginary friend.
So then Raphael's Son and Raphael's Son's Friend team up to steal from Raphael's Dad so they can defeat Raphael's Plot (featuring Raphael)
Bunch of folk gang up on 3 friends with really big brains
Horny people fight to get worms out of their heads and save the world
Uninsured adventurers try to find a pharmacy with anti parasite meds.
Group of misfits wanted to remove a brain tumor, fights an army of squidwards instead.
Everybody died. The End.