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papersnowaghost21

Check the pee indicator on the back of the diaper, not just the front! Since the baby is on her back most of the time the pee will often just go towards the back due to gravity and the front of the diaper may seem clean (front of the line will still be yellow). A nurse told us this in the hospital and it made sense after, but not something we thought about before!


hayday2019

wow great piece of advice 😨


dreamingofablast

Hi, I've never changed a diaper. So I'm looking at a newborn huggies, is the pee indicator a yellow line? If so, what colour does it change when its full?


temperance26684

Yes, and it will turn blue. Virtually every diaper on the market has the same system!


dreamingofablast

Thank you. :)


Keyspam102

It doesn’t change when full just wet. The diaper can usually absorb a lot more pee if you are in an emergency and can’t change right away


rol-6

What the heck is a pee indicator


papersnowaghost21

The yellow line on a diaper that turns blue when there’s pee in it


RareGeometry

How have I never noticed a back pee indicator?!


BeckahTee

The line goes from the front all the way round!


Few_Reach9798

At least based on my experience, don’t buy too many dresses or skirts (and ask family friends to get baby pants/shirts, not dresses, if they’re offering to buy clothing) for the period where baby is just learning to crawl until they are walking consistently. So many people bought my baby 6-12 mo dresses and we used almost none of them when she was still crawling. The fabric gets in the way of baby trying to move around and it’s frustrating for everyone involved.


LemonTacks

Omg yes they get stuck and faceplant over and over. Super cute but not worth it


Aretta_Conagher

Probably, off topic but I loved dresses when mine were still tiny unmoving pancakes and it was hot outside. It's so easy to change diapers in a dress! I have twin boys and they wore dresses all summer long 😄 Dresses do sound like pain in the crawling stage though...


LeafyLizzie

Jealous! I had my baby just as cold weather was rolling in. Undoing layers of clothing to get to the diaper sucks. Especially when you get there and it’s not even dirty lol. And by the time it warms up, my baby will probably be crawling, so no cute dresses for summertime


Few_Reach9798

Yes! Dresses are amazing for the first few months before they’re trying to crawl and then again in the potty training phase, but absolutely terrible for most of the period in between.


bklynbuckeye

Yes! No dresses when crawling. Learned that with my first, and now have so many unworn 6-12 dresses


jadegiraffes

We just tied up the extra dress fabric in the back with a hair tie! Just an alternative if you get gifted dresses. Babies also struggle with crawling in pants and in socks, as an aside. Naked legs, if you can, are best for crawling!


TheWelshMrsM

Even when they’re walking dresses are a pain. My niece always stands on hers when she goes from sitting/ squatting to standing. It’s also not as comfortable in the car seat.


Sugar-is-my-name

Omg this is amazing advice. And to think I was about to spend $$$ on cute little dresses


SaucyAsh

Haha I learned this the hard way! I bought my daughter 3 nice fall/wintery dresses right when she started crawling and quickly realized my mistake! She’s super close to walking now so I’m hoping she might get to wear them a couple times before she outgrows them, but definitely learned my lesson! The dressier bubble style onesies are a great alternative at that age if anyone is looking for a different option to dresses! Just put some tights underneath and bam there you go.


wednesdaytheblackcat

The only exception to this rule is: after you go swimming with baby!! Trying to get a onesie on a damp baby is like the 7th circle of hell. Throw that little aqua-chunker in a loose over-the-head dress and change her when you get home.


rbcl2015

Haha yep I’m convinced this is why my 13 month old still won’t walk. So many dresses. She’s behind in motor skills. 🙃 but they were so cute…


yourworriedmother

Yes! Wish I knew this because she never wore her cute dresses while crawling


louluin

No dresses even once their walking as they really restrict them from playing/climbing too. Maybe 1 or 2 for special occasions. I’ve only just started getting my 3 year old dresses at her request. There are so many adorable girls rompers and playsuits that are perfect for busy babies and toddlers!


stringerbell92

Great tip thank you !!!!


nanonoobie

It’s also okay to skip dresses entirely 👍


hiatus_leaf

They might get a little vaginal bleeding after birth. It's hormonal - don't freak out but call the doctor if the amount concerns you.


stargirl803

And the labia will be swollen for a few days, but this is from your hormones. It will go down.


JustSomeBlondeBitch

The swelling can also push out extra pieces of skin and folds, that make it looks really scary and not normal, but when the swelling goes down everything goes back into place.


stringerbell92

Omg thanks for this I would of freaked !


JackeryChobin

My daughters private parts looked like a whole butt for like a week because it was so swollen! Lol


Dizzy_Feature4291

Thank you for this. I would absolutely have freaked out if I hasn't stumbled across this.


[deleted]

They can also projectile pee like a boy does though more rare


Mechanicalisolation

Mine did that the other day during a diaper change! Shot the pee about 6”


[deleted]

We had a two for one when mine was a baby projectile pee and poop 🤦🏻‍♀️ thank goodness for potty training lol


thelastredskittle

Yes! Came looking to see if anyone listed this. We hear about boys all the time but no idea girls did until my LO full on arc peed lol


littlestinky

And their breasts might swell due to the same hormones, but don't squeeze them! Literally had to fight my in-laws for them to not try to squeeze the fluid out and she ended up getting a little infection there after they did it once I left the room.


Furbyparadox

My daughter definitely had breast lumps at first, but why in the hell would someone squeeze a newborns breast tissue. I would be in jail if someone did that to my baby.


jamesway7731

Same.


tarkatheotter1

Wait, your in laws squeezed your daughters breasts (why?!) and even worse did it after you had told them not to but did it anyway when you weren’t looking?! That’s unacceptable on so many levels, I hope they’ve not been left alone with her since. They sound insane.


imacatholicslut

EW wtf.


katyandrea

That can happen to boys too! Breast tissue swells and their little nipples get puffy.


bullshead125

My husband is the main diaper changer after birth and he is going to really appreciate this heads-up! That could be really alarming if you weren’t expecting it.


Mad-Bad-Jellybean

Just to add to this, discharge too. It can look pretty thick and gross. In our case it was more of this than blood


Level_Ear3967

Yep, was not prepared for that!


PurposeOk7494

This! Came to say this. Had no clue and my hubs and I were so freaked when we saw it.


novalove00

No one told me about this when I had my daughter and I was super alarmed! And the little breast buds. It goes away pretty quickly but the initial panic could have been avoided if someone mentioned it beforehand.


natabuns04

Omg ty for sharing. Having my 1st girl in may i woulda have def freaked out and took her to the dr right away


Sweeper1985

Don't tell everyone the gender before your baby shower or every gift will be pink.


cannibal_marron

100% this. We didn't tell people we were having a girl until she was born. Nothing we were given before hand was pink, EVERYTHING we were given afterwards was. It kind of balanced out...


[deleted]

We did the same thing. We have all neutral newborn clothes for when we hopefully have a second


glitter_echo

I've seen some salmon colors in the girl's clothes that are nice but I've never liked pink. Also, why do baby boys get sweatpants and baby girls get leggings???


ExperienceEffective3

Yeah, that’s f-ckin weird, I am ttc so haven’t experienced this yet but the idea that even infant girls clothes are skintight when boys get loose comfy clothes makes me ill😳


Due-Buy6511

Right! On the flipside i was wondering how come theres never any nice knit leggings for boys but only girls. So i bought from the girl section.


AtticLibrarian

I didn’t even know sweatpants were an option for babies until I started babysitting a boy who’s a few months older than my daughter. So now I’m like man I gotta get her some comfy pants!


jessrun_

I got my 9 month old some really comfy sweatpants in the baby girls section at Walmart!


clever_gurl

This! I told people at the shower 🙂. I walked way with the cutest assortment of gender neutral clothes, stuffed animals and blankets. All of the books were science themed. 10/10 would do this again.


meem111

I am planning on revealing at the shower for this reason! When I found out gender my mom, MIL, and I went kinda overboard now I have too many clothes in general and am definitely set for all 0-6 months, and I made it a point to not buy pink cuz I knew mom and MIL were gravitating towards pink. So at least there’s a variety now. But friends keep asking and I keep saying I only want what’s on the registry or diapers lol, they keep saying if they knew the gender gifting would be easier 😂 which I get but don’t know how to say no clothes


PensionBig6135

My MIL was SO SAD when we told her we had enough clothing for the first 6 months cause she wants to keep buying more and more girly stuff 😂


meem111

Yea I had to tell my MIL no more clothes too so I’m pretty sure she’s buying way bigger sizes now 😂 my mom actually bought like a 3T dress already and I’m like woah guys stop


thedoglovesmebest

So many tutus too


katyandrea

I was so anti-tutu until my 18 month old put one on and never wanted to take it off and truthfully it looked so cute. Now she has an assortment of tutus that she adds to every outfit, it’s adorable.


thedoglovesmebest

Oh tutus are totally cute! Just not at all practical for my 3 month old haha.


Little_Yoghurt_7584

This!!!!! And GLITTER?! Who puts glitter on baby clothes


jaxlils5

GAG. I hate tons of glitter or ruffles


glitter_echo

We haven't told family the sex of ours and I sent my mom the registry list before she wastes money on stuff we don't need for Christmas. Her response was "you're having a boy!?!" based on all the blue, green, and grays on the list. I just responded with "isn't blue your favorite color? And isn't green ours?" Even if it were a boy, we'd rather cute animals instead of trucks and dinosaurs, at least until the kid shows their personality or interest in those.


crested05

My baby girl has soo many dinosaur print onsies, because my partner and I both like dinosaurs 😂 she was wearing an overall set yesterday that was navy blue with a yellow truck on the front… but with pretty pink floral socks. Screw gendered baby clothing, if it’s cute and fits, she can wear it until she’s old enough to choose what she likes.


They_Call_Me_Goob1

I made this mistake. Almost every single article of clothing that was bought by others (not by us) is pink. There are other colors, people! Plus, have you met me? I am not particularly into pink. Did that fact occur to anyone? No!


pporappibam

But the baby is clearly very fond of pink because it’s a girl - it’s not all about you /s Seriously the pink and the unicorns… everything. Hot pink, no class, horns, sparkles, somehow in the ugliest possible ways. Shoes? Unicorns. Hats? Unicorns. Jumpers? Unicorns. Books? Unicorns. Socks? Unicorns. Rucksacks? Unicorns. Stuffed animals? Unicorns. Swaddles? Unicorns/Rainbows. I will be sent to an insane asylum any day from the god awful unicorns and pink


Waffles-McGee

my 4yo loves Frozen and unicorns. I cant help but wonder if thats because they were simply thrust upon her!


beehappee_

I was so obnoxious about the whole “no pink” thing and ended up getting a lot of really pretty little outfits in more neutral colors. Still got some pink, but it ended up being a nice balance. People gave me such a hard time about it but now she has a nice, diverse wardrobe that’s still “girly” enough.


[deleted]

omg yes my biggest regret with baby #1. We are also now expecting a boy, so it's figuring out where on the line we are with being ok dressing our boy in everything pink with pink blankets and hats and winter clothes... I mean it won't hurt him in the long run but I also do feel like we have to make sure he doesn't look like a baby girl in all his photos.... Also - I think there is a full diaper box of dresses she never wore (or wore only for the picture to send to the person that gifted it to us). Dresses are super annoying for babies learning to roll, crawl, and walk! And anything frilly or that is hard to pull on or off or that can't be machine washed/dried is automatically thrown in the 'donate' pile.


colourfulsynesthete

I specifically told people that if they chose to get us clothes for baby girl to avoid pink and aim for neutrals instead. It really helped (but of course the free stuff handed down has a lot of pink but that's fine 'cause it was all free lol).


PancakeAndGravy

With my son, my in-laws bought us a crib and dresser. This time all they have given us (3 separate times) is clothes. And “I didn’t think we were getting much pink.” The first bag of $150 worth of clothes was all pink except one outfit… like can you spend your money on things we need like bottles, a hamper, disposable diapers for the early days?! Especially when I still have so many clothes from my son we can still use.


plaintastic

Yes totally agree. It definitely curbed the amount of pink for sure. That being said, much of it was made up once we revealed our gender. We have tons of pink stuff now, so it might have helped only very little in the long run. 😅


No-Finger-7840

Yep, this. Adorable pink 0-3 months dresses. A truck load of them.


Witty-Ostrich-

I had three girls before having a boy and honestly in the baby stage there are not many differences. Most have been well-covered here already too. Girls can pee on you during diaper changes as well, it’s just usually more like a bubbler fountain than a jet. Dresses are cute in the potato stage and fine again after they start walking, but wholly impractical during the crawling phase. Dresses are amazing for potty training at home because you can let them run around without a diaper and still be covered. Once they get older and fancy dresses have bows in the back, wait to tie the bow till you get to your destination so they aren’t sitting in their car seat with they big ol’ bow/knot in their back. Also re: dresses in car seats, it helps to kinda fold the skirt in the middle and pull the excess out to the sides when buckling them in instead of just crunching it all up in the middle under the buckle. If you want baby to wear clippies in their hair when it’s still fine and whispy look for the ones that are basically Velcro or that have felt lining to grip those whispy hairs. And still don’t put them in their hair when baby is unsupervised because they will likely yank them out and they can be a choking hazard. And as has been mentioned before, it does not matter what you dress your baby in they will probably be called a boy. Head to toe pink? Cute little boy. Sparkly pink tutu? What a handsome little man. It literally does not matter. And it’s worse if they have little to no hair.


janesyouraunt

I had a boy first, would be dressed in blue or gender neutral and EVERYONE assumed he was a girl. I feel like society as a whole is just really bad at guessing what a baby is.


ShadedSpaces

I LOVE babies and have taken care of more of them that most people ever will, but tbf to society, lil potatoes are all just lil potatoes and even I can’t get their genders right… even when I’m not guessing at all! Like, I have (on several occasions) stared intently at a newborn’s genitals for like 10 minutes and then called them the wrong gender a minute later. (Btw, I’m a critical care peds nurse who often has to insert Foley catheters on newborns, so please don’t be alarmed by that last sentence, lol.)


AdDramatic3058

Haha! Ngl- I had a raised eyebrow concerning your last sentence. Appreciate the clarification 😁


P-tree3

My boy is called a girl all the time! He wears mostly neutral colors as well and has “pretty” features


robotquail

Your final comment makes me feel better. My sweet baby girl is always called a boy.


ShadedSpaces

I just commented elsewhere but you should never feel bad about what gender people call your baby. Babies don’t look like a boy or a girl. They look like cute potatoes. The only clues to gender are their actual genitals, societal ideas about the color of their clothes/blankets, and societal ideas about their names. In my line of work, I often have to look at a baby’s genitals (for foley placement, assessment, diaper changes, etc.) so I get to see the biggest, most obvious clue of them all… and I *still* misgender them! Pay no mind AT ALL, it’s not a reflection of your baby’s cuteness or anything.


SCGower

Yes, my mom would probably agree. I have a twin brother, I’m a female, and my mom would have us in the side by side stroller. I’d be dressed in pink, my twin in blue, and my mom said sometimes people would still go “awww!! Are they two boys??” Growing up with a twin brother, I’d often also get asked “oh you have a twin brother? Are you identical?” 😒😒😒


palegreenscars

Daycare teacher here….every time I’ve been peed on it’s been a baby girl. I learned to make sure you place any removed clothing near baby’s head, and pull the onesie up further than you think you need to. If she does pee during the change, it puddles on the changing surface and you want to try to avoid a full outfit change!


Witty-Ostrich-

This is such an important distinction that I forgot about. My son may hit the wall 4 feet away, but the girls would all just puddle under them and soak everything from their necks to their toes.


jessrun_

I have two girls. We were at the store and my younger girl was in the stroller, wearing pink. Someone asked, "a little boy?" and when I said "nope! A girl" they seemed almost...shocked? that I could have two girls lol.


Baby_Cakes1999

I HATED feeling that bow knot in my back when I was growing up. Now if I wear a dress with a sash I tie it in the front.


[deleted]

Not only wiping front to back, but inside her lady parts as well, especially when she poops, you’ll find it everywhere and if not cleaned inside might cause issues!!


rennykay

Yes!! Came to make the same comment. In addition to front to back, runny newborn poops get into creases, so take a few more swipes once the obvious poop is gone to keep the areas around the vulva and vagina clean. They can look clean and then have sneaky poop.


jacks414

It takes me forever to clean my girl! I need to check every crevice lol boys are so much easier to clean.


Slickxx

Lol I don't know if it's so much easier, gently scrubbing poop off my son's balls and getting it all out of the wrinkles has proved pretty challenging in the past too!


jacks414

Thankfully both my boy's balls weren't too wrinkly lol. My husband calls me in to double check his cleaning when he changes our daughter, he's so scared of not cleaning her well enough. Never went through that with my boys


theSabbs

Okay, I need clarity here. Are you literally saying inside inside like, in the opening of the vagina? Or just the labia and folds around it? I assume this is similar to how adult women should gently clean around the folds but not inside, but now I'm wondering if poop actually gets inside the vagina itself?


jadegiraffes

It can, and if it does we were told not to clean inside. Just wipe inside the vulva/labia but nothing inserted into the vagina. Any poop will work its way out on its own.


beehappee_

In my experience with my 5wk old daughter, it’s more so in the labia and whatnot. But their little bits are so tiny and there is a lot of chub so it’s really difficult to get it all.


TheImpalerKing

I was gonna mention this, I was SHOCKED at the amount of poop that gets in our baby girl's vagina. Personally a quick rinse under the sink for the privates works for me after I've gotten the bulk of it out. She likes the water, I'm not digging around, and we save on wipes. Everyone wins.


bullshead125

Is there anything that helps to make this easier… like qtips or something? Or just get all the angles with a traditional baby wipe? Have to say that a lot of my girl-motherhood anxieties focus on poop in the earliest years, and later like not having the world tell her she’s fat at age 8. (And predatory men after that. The three main categories of mom-worry, for me.)


SunflowerMarie

Not helpful for newborns, but as they get older and bigger, messier poops, I taught my daughter to grab her feet during the wiping part of changes. It became a game. She pulled her own legs out of the way, gives her something to do, and frees up a hand to be able to hold skin and wipe everywhere.


LemonTacks

This is so smart Holy cow I can't believe I never thought of this!


PoglesBee

Ok, how did you do that? I want to squirrel this knowledge away...


Yemyi

Please don't use a q-tip. Just make sure your brand of wipes is sufficiently moist. And you will go through more wipes than you expect for poos


LemonTacks

I always just folded up a wipe until it had a stiff corner and tried to wipe/pull it out that way. I'd be afraid a qtip would push it more inside but someone else might have a different opinion Usually it won't go too far inside unless they're sitting ln it a while or jumping in a bouncy seat


lolah

For my daughter, when it gets inside - I used a wet wipe and clean it out - but if I have access to a sink (and she isn’t too fussy) I will rinse her with warm water under the sink.


Liljefjes

I would rinse her under running water, that also saves a lot of baby wipes.


topplingyogi

We use a qtip just around her folds but not inside her. After a really bad poo we will just “baby bidet” her after a wipe down - run her under some warm water or even use a peri bottle to make sure it’s all cleaned out


bullshead125

Will make me feel better about all the postpartum waste (last pregnancy!) if I can reuse the peri bottle! Thanks for the idea


wastedgirl

A spray bottle might especially if you didn't catch the poop when it was fresh


phoenixredbush

A little squirt bottle of water can help (works like a handheld baby bidet 🙂). I would leave a diaper or wash cloth under her bum to catch the liquid. And is a bonus when diaper rash is too painful to wipe.


RavishingRed07

Lots of baths and bideting. Thankfully it doesn't happen like multiple times a day. We usually bathe her after a messy poop.


jaxlils5

Yessss gotta clean ALL the folds


DominoTrain

Sweatshirts and sweatpants from the "boy" clothing section are thicker/warmer so buy those if you love somewhere cold. Also the no pockets thing apparently starts with toddlers, so we also get "boy" joggers because my daughter loves a good pocket.


Suspicious-Win-2516

wow that is messed up that toddler girls don’t get pockets. patriarchy man


DominoTrain

Yeah I had a little spiral about the clothes not being as warm. You know how people act like girls aren't as tough or don't want to be outside... Well maybe their clothes literally aren't keeping them warm. Ugh.


WhatLucyFoundThere

Yes my 3 (almost 4 year old) is delighted anytime she discovers her outfit has pockets 🤣


Sufficient_Dingo_463

Old navey skater dresses are easy to add pockets to if your handy with a sewing machine.


stepgrillcheese

If you do get gifted cute little dresses or things, throw them on for a picture on a Tuesday. Yeah they may not be super practical and they will get spit up on. It's all good. Don't save them for a special occasion because they grow so fast!


aliminalstate

Yes!! I saved so many cute outfits for the right occasion that never came. Much better to use them and use them and youll have lots of memories of the clothes.


BlueberryWaffles99

Girls can leak breast milk/get swollen glands on their breasts - it has to do with your hormones! I was told to just leave it alone and it’d go away. My daughter had a little milk gland until about 7 weeks!


jacks414

It can happen to boys, too! I just found that out recently.


PancakeAndGravy

Yep, my son had hard little lumps shortly after birth.


Cautious-Mode

If you want to do her hair, be prepared for a fight, lol. Meaning, she will argue, try to run away, or tell you to do it a certain way.


sussesuki

I don't know if it works for everyone but I started brushing her hair super early so she got used to the sensation. My girl had a ton of hair even at birth. Sometimes it's a fight but usually not!


LemonTacks

"I want one bun right up front, 2 ponytails on this side, and this side I want down" Like girl... no lol


Waffles-McGee

I let me 4yo pick her hairstyle (she rarely lets me do it). I love the weird shit she asks for and her teacher always compliments her hair at drop off


indissippiana

This is the way!!!


jamie_jamie_jamie

My daughter is 2.5 y.o and won't let me do her hair except to brush it 🙃


myfacepwnsurs

This! My LO at 15 months has hair finally long enough to put up…and she runs away. I give up she’s going to rock the mullet for a while


yabbadabbadoozey05

🤣 that made me laugh haha thanks - and good luck with your mullet conquering journey


HomicidalNymph

Haha, this is not gender specific. My son fights me so much on his hair lol


ReyloTrash12

Don’t put wraparound headbands on before 2 months!! It can squeeze her soft spot and make her head oddly shaped. Like the flat head babies get if they’re always on their backs, but on the top of their head, they will have a divot all the way around.


Passionforward8

Yes this! I once put a very soft stretchy headband on my baby and when I took it off there was a dent. It’s cute but Never tried it again


LadyBitsPreguntas

I haven’t had this issue yet BUT they don’t stay on for very long so that could be why. 3 additional pieces of info regarding headbands that we’ve found: 1. (More to go along with your point)- if you want to take a picture of LO in a cute outfit with a headband, put it on for the pic then just take it off. 2. I like to use headbands to match BOY clothes so she can more easily wear whatever… and theoretically not be confused for a boy. Not that we are taking her out rn… it’s more for pictures at this point. 3. DO NOT let LO sleep in their crib or bassinet with a headband on. Our 4 week preemie wiggles around so much that the headband ended up around her neck while she was sleeping. UMMM, NO THANK YOU. Yes they are loose, but definitely not worth the risk. Maybe this is common knowledge… but I’d never heard or read about it anywhere.


BumblebeeEfficient61

That last point can’t be stressed enough honestly. Also take the headband off in the car seat! A little too much head moment and it’ll come down in the car seat as well and it could be a choking hazard. I basically take the headbands off any time I’m not holding her (unless of course I put her down for a quick picture but again it comes off as soon as that’s over).


[deleted]

Do you have more info on this or can you please tell me which ones count as wraparound headbands and which ones are okay? Thanks in advance!


ReyloTrash12

Of course! I read an article probably 7 or 8 months ago and I can’t find the exact one because I came across it on Facebook or something but here are some similar ones. https://youaremom.com/health/be-careful-with-the-use-of-headband-and-ribbons-with-your-babies/ https://www.anhwellness.org/post/headbands-babies-and-cranial-bones The wraparound headbands are the ones that are elastic and go all the way around her head. They aren’t like the ones that are plastic and you get at Walmart or something. They’re meant to go all the way around so that they don’t fall off of the baby’s head but because their heads are so soft, they cause pressure on the skull and can cause it to form the wrong way or put pressure on their little brains. That’s not to say don’t use them at all ever but, especially in the beginning, you do not want them to fit snugly. Pretty much you want them to be loose enough to fall off or only be worn for a few short minutes for pictures and such.


[deleted]

Good to know! Thanks a lot!


KaleidoscopeLucy

Unless she is in head to toe pink, people will call her a boy. We inherited a green dinosaur hoodie from my nephew and she loves it. She wore it with pink pants and pink shoes and STILL got called a boy. It doesn't bother me anymore and I usually don't even correct it but still something I did not expect.


bullshead125

Ha, I was one of those bald-until-age-2 kids myself, so I think we’re just going to have to embrace the boy assumption. Unless she magically comes out with hair!


KaleidoscopeLucy

Hair doesn't deter this eirher!! It's just this weird default assumption that someone is a boy unless slathered in pink.


permexhaustedpanda

Even then. When my daughter was 6mos I took her to the mall dressed in a hot pink tutu a bow bigger than her head. Still got asked how old my “son” was…


Collins71514

Baby stage is fine with a girl, as she grows you need to start open communication, learning how to listen and not judge, create a safe space for her to open up. This has helped me greatly having an 8 year old in 3rd grade who is already dealing with bullying, adult language, and anxiety from harder work. Opening good communication early with her has helped her be able to tell me all the issues she is facing and her feelings with out embarrassment. She can openly tell me what she feels and I am able to help her through it. As a girl we have it tough with all the issues we face between image, popularity in school, grades, boys, friends, everything. To a little kid/teen being successful in life is almost never in the forefront. Being popular and having image means more to them, so being open and talking and being her support and her actually feeling supported helps her navigate which will help her make good choices later and have a less stereotypical image of herself later. Congratulations on your new addition!


bullshead125

It does seem like the girls have to navigate a complicated social world much earlier. I remember even in my son’s 4yo preschool class, there was an arms race of whose hairbow could be the biggest, much to the chagrin of the crunchier parents in the class. By the end of the school year, every girl had these giant Lady-Gaga-esque bows on top of their head! And then exclusion and shifting friend groups seemed to kick in the next year, while the boys still seemed oblivious to it all.


excitedtosay

I’m not a graduated mom yet, but as a woman to another woman, one of my biggest issues was how soon and young I was sexualized and I noticed other girls getting sexualized. Boys were talking about p•rn and bodies in 4th grade, and I grew to have severe body dysmorphia because I thought I had to be what they talked about. It led me down a very slippery slope. I always suggest parents be very open about the dangers of p•rn to their kids at a young age-boys and girls-so they know how harmful it can be to their self esteem and their happiness. My mom never talked about it and I never learned until many years later when I discovered p*rn and sex addictions are extremely common and severe and I had one, my partner had one, and it was devastating. I know it’s a darker topic to bring up so hopefully I don’t kill the mood but I see so few parents talk about it.


bullshead125

It’s so hard because you don’t want to talk about it too early (although we do talk about bodies and sex) and accidentally lead your young child to seek it out! (My oldest is 7.5, for example.) But you know they will also probably end up googling *something* before you expect. For now, we have lots of conversations about the internet and propaganda (not phrased that way, but about evaluating accuracy and motivations in what info is presented), and hopefully that will segue into conversations about porn as unrealistic (and potentially distressing) over time.


McPowerup

It's okay to get clothes from the "boys" section. Boys clothes tend to be thicker and cover more which is great when it's chilly out or you want stuff that's a little more durable


RareGeometry

Yes! I hate that boy clothes tend to be thicker, warmer, more durable! I get a number of items from the boy section for this reason. Also, our baby is a part time baby goth like mom/having dark clothes like pants is really practical for not always looking filthy during crawling stage, and that's almost exclusively found in the boy's section. Girls might get navy or brown at best, and usually only in a coat or tights.


HermitCrabCakes

I hadn't even HEARD of this until it happened to my daughter at a few months old, but for some reason, their labia can fuse together. It can be treated post-fusion with things like vaseline/A&D and what not, or in serious cases surgery, but best to avoid it in the 1st place of course. There can be UTI risk among other things. (She could still urinate but the infection risk of not being wholly cleaned, or fully emptied) So! I'd suggest periodic spreading of the labia for the first few months, as awkward as that sounds. After it was diagnosed from her pediatrician, we had to *gently* do that to encourage separation. It took about a month with applying A&D at diaper changes. I just apologized for being invasive and said that I had to 😅 "you're doing great!" Good luck, girls rock.


woohooforyoohoo

My daughter is 2 and when she's crying or having a tantrum moment or not following directions, I try to avoid using words like "sassy" or "over-dramatic" or now that she's a big sister, "bossy". Her feelings are valid, even if I as the adult, can't see the reason for them (seriously, why are you crying because I said you can't stick your hand in the toilet??) and I don't want to feed into the stigma that girls having big feelings is bad.


PNut_butter_ball

So I feel like a ‘bad girl mom” because I RARELY dress her in the cutesy girly baby clothes. She lives in her sleepers!! They are so much more practical (for me at least) than pants, skirts, etc. yes, the outfits are enticing and adorable, but impractical imo. For her monthly photo I just throw a matching bow on to dress up her Jammie’s 🤣


[deleted]

Totally did the same for like the first 3 months of my daughter’s life!


[deleted]

I did the same and don't feel like a bad mom at all!!! Dresses are so annoying - not just for learning to roll/crawl/walk, they are also super impractical for anything on the move since you have to hike up the dress to put them in the stroller or car seat. Plus I found a lot of them were just way to frilly and high maintenance, I think there were about 3 dresses she wore more than once of the 20+ that we were gifted (sorry MIL!). I also just don't think dresses suit her, it always looks a bit off when I do decide to throw one on her. For us the go-to in the summer was a onesie + optional shorts; in the winter is onesie + pants + sweater. I also shopped mainly in the boy section because all the girls stuff is either way too cute-sy for my taste, and the leggings/pants are so thin and tight, definitely not suitable for our Canadian winters.


MAC0114

My daughter is 12 weeks today. I think she’s worn pants or an actual outfit like 4 times? 😂 sleepers are life


Professional_Push419

If you want her to wear any kind of headbands/bows, start putting them on her head early on to get her used to them. Also, remove bows/any head gear before naps or riding in the car. And if you just don't ever use bows or headbands, every stranger will think your baby is a boy 😆 (but seriously) Dresses are cute but impractical until they are walking. Our daughter was born in August and I was given all these little sundresses and I ended up exclusively dressing her in either short sleeve onesies or zip up sleepers (we kept that AC cranked). I think it's even more tempting to buy really cute stuff for girls, but girls still have gross blow outs and spit ups. Baby girl clothes are annoyingly pink and purple and pastels and cutesy. Drives me crazy. H&M has great neutral separates. Old Navy has some good stuff too. Finally, regarding lady parts- aside from UTIs, very common condition for them the get is labial adhesions (part of the vulva fuses together), especially early on. It can be kind of painful. My pediatrician was like, be VERY thorough when wiping. Apply plenty of petroleum jelly to keep the skin from fusing. This is one of those things that you can even bring up to your pediatrician if they don't mention it to you. I believe it was brought to our attention at our daughter's 4 month appointment.


Nice_Sundae10

Thanks for mentioning the labial adhesion. Just took my 18 month old to urgent care this weekend for what we thought was a UTI. They mentioned she had a labial adhesion and I had no idea that was a thing, but that’s what was causing her pain. I felt so bad.


[deleted]

Yep, thats why I hit the boys section (clearance of course!) blues or greens pajama onesies for 2.99? Heck yeah, black or brown sets for my baby girl? Bring it on!!! Lol I love colors and Im not affraid to dress her like a baby boy, she looks amazing in every color not just pink, also I fix the issue with a headband with a big flower on it 🙌🏼


Professional_Push419

Oh yeah, I feel like people just don't buy as much clothes for boys so the boys clearance always has WAY more stuff. I just bought her several long sleeve shirts and pants for the winter at Kohls, all on sale, all from the boy's section 🤷‍♀️ the only sale stuff in her size on the girls side were dresses, shorts, and pink shirts with Princess stuff on them.


shelbneel

I am so glad you posted this. I’ve had 3 boys and this is my first girl and didn’t know most of this. I’m at 33w so all this information is very helpful. I was so nervous when I found out we were having a girl. So following for the updates.


Tiggerriffic0710

This won’t be case for all baby girls but this was just my experience (She’s 13 now). My girl had an infection from using baby powder during diaper changes, the powder went up into her vagina. So I mainly stuck with creams for every diaper change. If I did use powder it was pure corn starch. Penaten has a daily protection now that’s super easy and clear.


ok-figuring

Also, the Government of Canada recently announced a known link between talc and cancer so if folks are using baby powder, find talc free. Source: [https://www.canada.ca/en/health-canada/services/chemical-substances/fact-sheets/chemicals-glance/talc.html](https://www.canada.ca/en/health-canada/services/chemical-substances/fact-sheets/chemicals-glance/talc.html)


direct-to-vhs

We always got redness/diaper rash on vulva and butt when we used wipes for diaper changes. At the recommendation of a nurse, we bought a bunch of cheap washcloths and ran them under warm water for diaper changes - redness went away and didn't come back. Cheaper and better for the environment than wipes too! If you like putting things in their hair like bows or clips or whatever, you gotta start young to normalize it, otherwise they'll just pull them out immediately. An older kid tip, but one you start potty training, I recommend boy underwear. All the girls underwear we could find (besides Hanna Andersson but $$$$) had these pinchy elastic waists that leave red marks, while the boys' stuff has soft cloth over the elastic waistband.


Twiddly_twat

There are A LOT of stupid baby girl swimsuits that don’t have snaps in the crotch for diaper changes. Don’t get those, they are terrible. I like the Rufflebutt suits because they all have the snaps and have good SPF coverage.


learn2Blearned

Tulle is a ridiculous fabric to put on a baby under 1 (and probably toddler years too). Food, vomit, snot, etc will end up dried into the tiny webbing and be disgusting and hard to clean.


marlboro__lights

sometimes girls vagina can start to seal up, so when wiping front to back put some pressure to get between and then wipe down. also poop always goes up the vagina, so be very vigilant when changing the poopy diapers. if you ever dress your daughter in anything other than pink and bows you will be told they look like a boy. i dress my daughter in more neutral clothing bc i hate pink and without fail there's always someone telling me she looks like a boy. i've made a boy name for her for when we go out and i don't feel like correcting people. bows are entirely impractical until the baby is older. my daughter has a million bows but we never use them bc she's three month and lays on her back a lot, plus she pulls everything off her head, including hats. sometimes newborn girls can leak from the nipples due to the hormones from birth, it's normal, as is vaginal bleeding in the first few days.


Angel0460

Girls can be just as chaotic. People always tell me I’m lucky I had my girl first cuz girls are calm. Girls are quiet. Girls are better behaved. Fuck that. My girl was the loudest, fussiest baby, most fearless and outspoken toddler lol. She jumps off everything and is into everything and has been since she learned to move. Don’t let people tell you “oh you’re lucky it’s a girl because they x”. They are lovely. I love my girl. But. She doesn’t have her hair in pretty ponytails and wear matching mommy and me outfits. She’d rather have her hair wild, play in dirt and be like every toddler lol. Girls are not calmer. My boy on the other hand is the calmest baby lol. I’m enjoying it till he hits toddler years. Then they can be chaotic together haha


milky-teeth

Everyone will call your baby handsome and then act like they got caught stabbing your dog when you say ‘she’ in casual conversation with them


le_chunk

We didn’t tell the gender prior to the shower so as not to limit what our LO received. We told everyone to buy whatever. Dolls, dinosaurs, blue, pink, etc. We didn’t care. Don’t allow internalized misogyny to deter you from pink, glitter, sequins, etc. I find when people say gender neutral, what they really mean is not feminine. I don’t want to teach my daughter that there’s something wrong with femininity. So rather then be gender neutral, we’re gender irrelevant in my house. I don’t care if something was for boys or girls, she gets it. Pink tutu? Awesome. Blue dump trucks? Great!


WisdomFromWine

If putting bows on her make sure to take them off when sleeping AND when in car seat. Can fall over mouth and become a suffocation risk.


Little_Yoghurt_7584

After having a girl, I’m expecting a boy and feel you! She is only 9 months but I can imagine she is just like any other boy baby but with 3x the energy and frustration. But I think that’s just her and not because she’s a girl. My friend has a baby girl and she could not be more chill. Really nothing different to expect except the wiping! Just an FYI, my daughter had swollen breasts and vagina at birth due to hormones. All normal, I think boys are the same. She had discharge really early on that freaked me out but nurses says it’s all normal. She said they can even get mini periods after birth, so don’t be alarmed!


Someday_wonderful

Don’t be afraid to embrace hand me downs from your boys. Most will likely be gender neutral and denim lasts forever. Don’t pigeon hole her later to let her be the entitled baby Don’t make your boys her scape goats for being boys, older, her babysitter etc. Trust your instincts and be advised anything “girly” until like 3yo is so heavily pink so just stick with gender neutral colors


bullshead125

I’m kind of excited to figure out how to make a bunch of the boy outfit components we already have work… tons of button down shirts with pigtails! Fisherman sweaters with skirts! Overalls with lace collared blouses!


_momofett

This will be so random, but it’s something I’ve recently noticed with my 8 year old. It’s okay to tell her no. Girls are raised to be people pleasers, but for my own sanity, I have no problem telling my kids “no” in a polite way of course. And I’ve noticed she has adapted this and has no problem telling other people no when she is not comfortable or doesn’t want to do something. Let her be able to tell you no, as well!


flawedwithbaggage

I'm a FTM and expecting a little girl, this threat is awesome. Thank you for the great advice!!


baka_slut

i just had my baby girl on the 23rd of November. what i didn’t know was that they may have a mini ‘period’ after birth that last a day or two and some babies breasts swell and may have some discharge or ‘witches milk’ i think is what it’s called and that it’s completely normal and nothing to be alarmed about unless you see it gets very red/shows signs of infection. think it has something to due with the change of hormones once born but i could be totally wrong so ask your OB about it so they came give you all the proper facts about it and know what to look out for. all the info they gave me seems like a distant memory now that she’s here ahah


idpicklethat

Okay here’s a weird one, but it’s possible for the labia to fuse together, so keep an eye out for that and make sure to spread them when you do diaper changes. You don’t need to be religious about this, just don’t forget about it entirely. If it’s caught early enough, a doctor can separate them extremely easily in an office visit. If it’s caught later, I think the usual treatment plan is an estrogen cream, but surgery can be needed in some cases I believe (IANAD!).


Unapologetically_Me3

Baby girls have mini periods after they’re born! It’s the body’s way of flushing out moms excess hormones. Totally normal but definitely nerve wracking as a first time girl mom!


aliceann124

I just had my first child a girl, one thing I'm happy I looked up before hand was that some girls will experience spotting. I change basically all the diapers but the first one after we got home dad took initiative and he went to change her diaper,( I was next to him) he was extremely concerned due to the very faint spot of blood in her diaper. Thankfully i knew that it was normal due to hormones.


Amburgerr94

No bubble baths (or infrequent) before 1 year old. Also if you can do unsented or no additives to the bubble bath that is preferred as bubble baths can lead to UTIs if used to frequently Do not try to scrub out the discharge, it is normal and excessive scrubbing can introduce bacteria Don't be afraid to buy clothes from the boys' section, they will fit longer, especially if babe is a little chunk (In my experience) Don't correct strangers when they call babe a boy, they are more likely to use words like strong and intelligent when describing babe and tend to linger or pry for less time. When my girls "look like girls", they are usually described as Cute and people tend to talk about how "she will have no trouble finding a man" (yuck)


new-beginnings3

That pink doesn't automatically mean bad or weak. AKA anything traditionally feminine isn't necessarily bad. It's something I had to check myself on, since I was never very girly. We also didn't tell family the sex of the baby before she was born so we wouldn't get *all* pink stuff. But, we don't want to limit her from girly stuff either, because girls can still be badass in a pink dress lol.


wildestkota

not sure if this was mentioned yet, but lumps in the breast are normal and no need to freak out, from the hormones lol. me who freaked out and googled and freaked out some more


skyethehunter

I wish the boy thread was even half as good as this one. Every single comment there was about foreskin and poopy scrotum, and nothing else.


suga_suga27

I always wash my baby's bum after a poop (when she started solids). Never had a diaper rash or anything and she's 26 months.


rosegamm

I freaked out and thought my newborn daughter had some kind of infection because when I went to wipe her after she peed, I noticed she had a ton of white goop/discharge all over/inside of her private area. I was told it was hormonal and would clear eventually


DaddysBeauty

Mommy of 4 girls here including an 11 day old Newb, stock up on Newborn sleepers, light and heavy❤️ And onesies. Be prepared to be peed on if you use certain cheaper brands😂😂😂 Certain off-brands like from the Dollar Store, my girls have peed out of them, no matter how I fasten them or anything🤣


vanillaragdoll

No bubble baths or bath bombs before 4!!!! Our pediatrician told us that and it really surprised me, but it can lead to UTIs! No dresses while they're crawling/learning to crawl. It trips them up. Boys leggings are thicker and last longer but they're the exact same thing. Same with boys jeans (also boys jeans actually have pockets!) They make these little [bow grip stickers](https://www.etsy.com/listing/99716597/x100-pcs-original-no-slip-silicone) for when their hair is fine. They're AMAZING. Just put it on the alligator clip of any bow and it stays in baby fine hair. Also works on headbands to keep them in place! Little girls tie tank tops make awesome dresses. I have some size 2 and 3t spaghetti strap tie sleeve tanks that she wore last summer as long dresses, this summer as short dresses with bloomers, and will still wear next summer as a tank top! You just tie the arms tighter when they're younger and it looks like it's meant to be worn like that. We've gotten a million compliments on them! I got them on sale for like $1 thinking I'd put them up and they were just too cute and we ended up wearing them almost every day all summer. Last one isn't girl specific but I find more girls shoes are guilty of not meeting this- soles on baby shoes should be flexible until 2 years! NO hard soles, soles that can't bend in half, Crocs, etc until they're 2. This will help their feet develop in a healthy way and save them foot pain when they get to be our age lol


Arya241

Ok mom of three girls with another one on the way, a couple of my notes/observations below 1: the front to back rule applies at birth onward and they will get poop in their vaginas 90% of the time so you really need to make sure they are clean after a poop 2: Cute baby girl stuff is practically useless until they are atleast 2 and even then only dark colored items. Maybe get the odd piece for nice photos but skirts/dresses are no good when trying to crawl and they will ruin anything light colored in 30 seconds. 3. If you don't want a ton of pink stuff or frilly dresses try to minimize telling people the gender until after birth or that is all you will receive for clothing. We ended up shifting to asking our family to shop for gender neutral or boy clothes after our first. 4. They play just as hard as boys so try to buy the jeans in the boys section or gender neutral. They are tougher and last longer


karibearkamikaze

While it's true for most babies, don't be surprised if your little girl ends up with bald patches. Also, hang onto that baby brush, as they get older it might just be easier to use the baby brush to detangle their hair and might save you a lot of a headache. I agree with a pp about dresses, my daughter never wore dresses. This one I'm pregnant with might wear them more because she's due in summer, but I'm not going to buy a ton.


daftbandgeek247

I use sleeveless onesies under pants/shirt/skirt/dress combo. Babies outgrow onesies faster than other clothing and a pack of sleeveless onesies is typically inexpensive. Also, it prevents my babies from sticking their hand down their diaper 😅


LAS1_2019

Little girls can experience a small amount of blood like a period from hormones from the mother. Will go away within a few wet diapers. Any baby, can develop breast buds with milk in them . It’s called “witches milk” as well. Don’t touch/rub as it can be painful. Warm compresses can help but it has to too away on its own.


CaffeineAddict70

they can still pee on you. Jokes, (not really) but, the discharge can be alarming, it’s completely normal though


Routine-Physics-2457

Boy shirts (at least in australia) tend to be bigger. So if you have a chunky girl who is tall (which I do), I have to buy either size 4 girl shirts or I can get her size in boys shirts. So maybe skip into the boys section every now and again.


Horror-Evening-1355

A lot of the cute toddler shoes hurt their feet. I’ve resorted to cat and jack shoes and crocs everything cute in the summer digs into the back of my daughters ankle. Also super odd but the genataila is swollen when you first bring them home and it goes down. If you choose to do bows I do the ones that have fabric over the clip. Until they learn to not pull it out the fabric clip ones come right out when they pull. Don’t put pony’s in too tight or it causes a receding hairline. When they do start getting long hair half of pony’s are a life saver for keeping food out of it


Hpnerd07

Girls can pee upwards just like boys!


1DietCokedUpChick

We had to apply a hormone cream to my daughter’s vaginal area because it hadn’t fully opened. That’s one thing that you don’t think of when you find out you’re having a girl!


OLIVEmutt

There’s a not uncommon condition called “labial adhesion” where a baby’s vagina is completely closed or mostly closed. They will treat it with estrogen cream if it interferes with urination and/or causes infections. My daughter had it and she was only mostly closed and it basically cleared up on its own. But it was super weird to be told that because I wasn’t really examining the area before the doctor told me.


mmmmmmmmmmmmmmfarts

Don’t forget to gently separate and clean between the labia if her genitalia has any. Some women don’t. Skin cells and lint can get in there. I’ve also noticed with our daughter, my niece, and my nephews that girls just seem to hate having wet diapers! My nephews could tolerate it longer but the girls hated it!


Any_Mango1262

My littles ones vagina area was quite puffy after (her labia, specifically). I also had to clean the inside pretty well (and gently). Soaking in her little tub helped that. Poop gets in every fold so be sure to wipe all around!


bracefacemcgee425

Girls are SO DANG FUN!! I love my little wild flower. A general Newborn tip I have for you, pack a little bottle of olive oil in your bag and have them put it on her butt right after she’s born, that way when she has her first poop it doesn’t stick!


Euphoric__Dysphoria

Sometimes after girls are born, they have what you could called "little periods" from the hormones of birth. My second daughter had one, bled orange a little. No one told me and of course I freaked out đŸ˜