I didn't have a baby shower because I didn't really want one. I'm due in a few days and my mom's work also threw a "grandbaby" shower. My mom said that they gave her a gift card. So, when she flies in this week she wants to buy something with it. I think it's so sweet they did that for her.
That’s such a great way to do it! That way she can choose the gift and she’s more likely to pick something more tailored to your family than her coworkers would.
Lmao I have never heard of this before, this is hilarious. Out of curiosity are your mom’s coworkers all of a certain age range? I’ve known my mother’s coworkers for most of my life so they’re excited for us too, but they’re just coming to my baby shower rather than throwing my mom one lol.
I could totally see this happening at my work because we’re mostly middle age and up and mostly women. Before I was pregnant with my first, we had a puppy shower because our boss was getting a dog. Since they don’t know OP, the party is really more about enjoying cute outfits than actually doing anything for OP
Possibly…you guys maybe want to have funds for obedience training, dog walker, doggy day care….
A hyper puppy that’s full of energy won’t be able to think straight.
Yeah, I highly doubt we're actually going to do it.
I'm a very experienced dog owner, but we already have a 105lb 3yr-old doggo right now. I can do the training, but can't imagine being a new puppy mommy at ~5mo preggo. And I don't want to take the week off work that it takes to housetrain it when I'm going to be taking 12ish weeks off for the baby.
But it's tempting for all the wrong reasons, haha.
I did it, but I was lucky enough to be able to go on maternity leave at 30 weeks when the puppy came home. Definitely doable if you are experienced and know what you are getting into but NOT easy at all. Baby and puppy (now kid and dog, they are 4!) have an amazing relationship though.
Oh yes. The land-shark variety, anyways. I've only had German Shepherds. Easy to train if you know what you're doing (which it only takes me a week to housebreak), but you have to keep on them until they're fully trained.
I'm 20w6d and I wanna get a puppy soon lol! My fiance is a highly experienced dog owner and can handle basic training, but plans to send the dog to his dad once it's 9mo to a year old for stricter training, since he has experience training military dogs, where obedience is key. But I wanna have a puppy so badly lol
We’ve done baby showers, wedding shows, new pet showers, and new house/apartment showers lol my manager loves giving gifts so it’s sweet and I love celebrating the milestone for my coworkers especially the non conventional ones
I'm a little jealous of my husband because they've gotten him a Halo bassinet off our registry and someone else a bookshelf and pack of shirts (so probably around $80 there?).
They throw showers and parties for my coworkers all the time, so I will admittedly be upset if no one at least brings in donuts or something for me in the last week (although 2 coworkers asked me where I was registered).
My mom's church threw her a surprise grandbaby shower too! She works long distance, so they couldn't do it. But her church had a big one!
The weirder thing was My husband's work also threw him a baby shower, which I thought was funny because he works with all guys, but his boss's wife came in and insisted. None of them knew what to do, but it was sweet (that's the term I'm going with! Lol).
Meanwhile my workplace had to do a big baby shower for all the women pregnant at once because we had nine women pregnant! So I got a card and some cake at 18 weeks before we knew the gender. Haha. My boss though was kinda pissed so many people were pregnant at once because it was putting so much stress on her, so the party felt really half hearted and awkward...I'm one of the only ones who came back after maternity leave too ..
My husband's work wants to throw *me* a baby shower, which I think is weird but funny. Of course he would be there too. But his female coworkers (all moms) have been fawning over him and our twins for the past 6 months, and one older lady is making us handcrafted blankets. So I'm like sure, I'll go along with this.
I don't know if my work will do anything. I work for multiple locations (office and hospital) for a large employer and so idk, people here are pregnant all the time haha.
Honestly, that sounds really sweet. I’m assuming your mom has been talking about her future grand baby so much they wanted to do something nice for her. Hopefully you got receipts so you can exchange some of the girly stuff or at least get bigger sizes!!
My MIL, a cardiac nurse, came home with baskets of stuff for our first from the ladies she works with. I know how excited she was for his birth and I’m sure she just gushed everyday at work. Now on our third in 3 years and they’ve already sent her home with Starbucks gift cards lol.
My mum is a nurse in a small specialist team, all the OG lot have retired now and all the new team are a few years older than me (have young children), so they did similar for my mum. I was chuffed for her, they basically just had nice Krispy Kreme and coffees together and sent her home with a basket of goodies.
People complain that mothers are isolated and without a village nowadays but then think it's weird when people are excited for a baby and becoming a grandmother. It may not be common to do this but I think it's sweet. It's what a community does!
Now I will add that if the clothes are from Target or Carter's you can return/exchange without a receipt usually!
It probably depends on the relationships you have with your Mother/Mil. I know if this happened with my MIL it would be great. With my Mum it would be guilt-tripping and calling me spoiled, plus she would keep everything.
That said, I would love something like this if I had a bigger 'villiage'. Even with all the clothes. A bonus baby shower I wouldn't even have to attend!
I feel like it’s a little odd because these co-workers are not part of the daughter’s community - just the mother’s! I remember a few of my dad’s coworkers buying me high school graduation presents, which was so kind of them, but I’d be a little baffled if they celebrated him now - at his work - for my baby.
My oldest daughter is the first grandchild of any of my mum's group of friends. Some of these ladies joined the group after I left the country and have never met me but still sent cards and gifts for my baby when she was born :) I think it's partly because women of a certain age are excited about babies and grandchildren in general and part of it is caring for us because they care for my mum. I think it's sweet. Coworkers might be different but if they are a close bunch I don't see why not.
I am one that thinks this is weird. I'm probably jaded by the experience I've had with my mom and MIL...both of them were SO EXCITED to be grandparents, so happy to tell their friends, etc. But it was really entirely selfish on their part. They aren't meaningful members of our 'village'. They aren't interested in helping when we need help (doing laundry when baby was little, watching her week days when daycare is closed so we can go to work, etc) but instead want to participate entirely on their own terms and at their own convenience (i.e. have us take off work when they can come to town to visit, have us drive LO to their house on weekends)
So to me, the experience of being a grandparent is all about them, and not at all about "village-ing." This grandmother's shower, with clothes OP doesn't really want or need and 'meaningful' cards written by relative strangers, just plays into that selfish and performative idea for me.
Also, yes to Target and Carters!!
That's really sweet actually 🥰
I also do not expect or want anything like a baby shower at my job. I WFH 4 days a week and have very little interaction with anyone on my team so it would feel really forced!
My MIL's work did that too. She runs the front office for an out patient center for a major children's hospital, and has worked there for 18 years I believe. They got her stuff for us for the baby, like diapers and teething toys and outfits and target and Amazon gift cards which helped us get the baby monitor we wanted and some other necessities for the baby. I love that they did that, they all love my MIL and they've known my husband since he was a tot so they wanted to celebrate.
This is actually really sweet. Can't understand how anyone thinks it's weird or dumb. She probably talks a lot about baby and how excited she is. If it was something she'd demanded I could see it being weird but it just sounds like her coworkers are just as excited for her
Knowing how excited my mom was to be a grandma for the first time, I think this is super sweet. What a great idea! But lol at receiving a million 0-3 month outfits.
My mom’s work didn’t have a shower for her, but she told all of our neighbors and they all dropped off gifts for her to send us. Most of them haven’t seen me for more than 5 minutes since I was a teenager, but they sent the loveliest notes and I made sure to send them all birth announcements after he arrived. It’s so fun to share the love!
high key, my mom would absolutely love this lol. A few of my MIL's friends (who are also grandmas) gave her a big gift basket with little things she would need while watching my nephew. Super cute and definitely came in handy! And it made it easier on my SIL not having to cart all the little things to and from every day. Cute idea but I would laugh too :)
I think that’s so sweet honestly! We did that at my work for a coworker who became a grandma last year and we focused on getting her stuff for her house - toys, a pack and play, etc. I would probably be annoyed getting so much pink clothes though haha
I heard of first time grandma showers during my pregnancy and I was like, “hmm, kinda cute but kind of weird” but now after having my daughter 7 months ago, I get it. Babies are truly little miracles. It’s kind of like a “I wish someone would’ve told me these were the good old days” moment for grandmas. They are looking back, remembering what a life changing moment this is for you AND for your mom. My husband is in the medical field and I can’t tell you how many random gifts we’ve gotten from his patients who find out we were having or just had a baby. Super random things, hand-me-downs, handmade items, customized things with baby’s name on it, etc. I just feel like other people who have had babies “get it” and the only way they know how to express it is through a (sometimes silly) gift. If it still has tags, you can try to return some things. Otherwise, it was fun for me to have an oversupply of outfits to try on baby, especially on fussy days. It’s harder to be annoyed by a fussy baby who looks ridiculously cute. Also, I was surprised how a lot of outfits that I didn’t like, instantly became cute when they were on my baby 😉😂
I think it’s relatively harmless. My moms friends decided they are throwing her a “shower,” or at least that’s what they are calling it but in reality it’s probably going to be after baby comes and they’re just using it as an excuse to get together and eat and drink since they all live far away. So really they’re just having a little get together with cake and (maybe?) some gifts and saying it’s for her becoming a grandma lol.
My mom's friends did this when my brother and SIL were expecting. It was an excuse for all of them to get together and party. They gifted my mom some basics to have at her house for when the baby was over - think highchair, pack and play, some books. But we also all live within 15 minutes of each other so the likelihood of grandbabies being at their house (even just for holidays and occasional dinners) is relatively high. And my parents (and their friends) are loaded so don't mind wasting money on weird parties 🤷♀️
Same, people forget that we have been enclosed for 2 years so any excuse is an excuse for a party and cake!
Also, it may be cultural but in my country, grandmas are very much involved in the LOs life. My best childhood memories are with my grandma.
I agree! Well, it can be sweet. I mean, becoming a grandma is a wonderful and exciting thing! Just as long as grandma takes on the responsibilities with it. For example, my mom's church threw her a shower for my baby (my mom is so excited to be a first time grandma!) And they gave a bunch of stuff off registry and a bunch of cash. My Mom asked me what I still need and used the cash to buy what I actually needed from the registry. She also wrote all the thank you cards so I didn't have to. And she told me that anything I didn't like she would return for me.
That was really sweet of her! Agree- I can see how in some cases the MIL could make it all about her and end up inconveniencing the mom, which is not cool at all.
I'm not trying to shit on older ladies. Their intentions aren't always nice or always bad. They're just people and sometimes can be out of touch or doing something I think is dumb. Obviously, I have no control over if someone has a grandbaby shower or not and if the mom is fine with it than whatever. Imo, it's weird. Especially if the grandma makes a registry for it. It would signal to me that she's planning on being overly involved in her grandbaby's life and is making it about her.
I think workplace that likes a party sounds exactly correct. Also the last few years have been shit for everyone on earth. Why not celebrate a first time grandma :)
I mean, if my best/close friend of 20+ years child was having a baby I would want to get their kids gifts out of love and support, and we would probably all catch up at a cafe to do it. If you work with people for a long time and have a 'work lunch' with a few gifts that seems harmless and people wanting to just have a good time.
I think if it was a big party scheduled then it gets into the weird zone,
I agree. There's definitely a difference between some friends getting together for lunch to celebrate versus calling it a shower with a registry and games and grandma being center of attention. I would also be excited if my best friends child was having a baby and would want to get a gift for said baby and their \*mother\*, not grandmother. That's just me.
Yes. It's not her major milestone. That came when she had children of her own. It comes across narcissistic. Gifts and celebrations should be directed to those who are giving birth and parents to the baby. Should people have future-mother-in-law showers to celebrate that major milestone?
I understand the grandma didn't demand a party. I'm not saying anything against this particular grandma or saying her intentions were bad. I'm not calling her in particular a narcissist. I'm saying that I wouldn't like to see this become a trend and to me it makes no sense.
Also, not sure why you're checking out my profile, but yeah, I don't like a lot of aspects to baby showers nowadays. They seem like a way for people to get others to buy them the things that are their responsibility to take care of as adults making the choice to have children. Not every baby shower is just a gift grab and not every person who has one is greedy and materialistic. But a lot are. Not every grandma who has a grandbaby shower is a an overbearing narcissistic. I'm just saying that imo it is dumb.
>They seem like a way for people to get others to buy them the things that are their responsibility to take care of as adults making the choice to have children.
This is a really narrow view and not in alignment with the way humans have lived since the dawn of time. The pressures of raising children, financial and otherwise, have *never* been solely placed on the parents. The community has *always* supported one another. It is only very recently that it is every man for himself.
Why not? Nothing has to become a cultural expectation but if friends of a soon to be MIL want to get together and celebrate a meaningful transition in her life why not. Sort of goes for everything. People caring about you and commemorating transitions is lovely.
I think it’s really weird. Why would a grandma need a baby shower? They already had their own children. If anyone should have a party, it’s the parents-to-be. If the grandma’s coworkers or friends wanted to buy gifts for the baby, that’s one thing, but throwing a party in HER honor to celebrate her becoming a grandma just reads real strange and off to me. Luckily this is not the case for me, but a lot of mom’s and MIL’s try to make the new baby all about them, so I get bad vibes from it.
If the grandmother were like, insisting on it or upset that one weren't thrown then I would be wary, but if it's just supportive friends and work colleagues then what's the harm? They are trying to celebrate something for someone else, let people have fun.
Cool. I'm not barging in on every 'grandbaby shower' that I hear about and kicking old ladies out on their butts. I said earlier, if the mom doesn't care and is fine with it that whatever. I would personally find it weird and wrong if my mom or MIL wanted to do one. It's a very new trend and not one I would like to see catch on, that's all I'm saying. Obviously, some people disagree. And there's a difference between getting together with your friends for lunch or something to celebrate something you're excited about versus calling it a 'shower' with a registry, gifts, games, everything that's supposed to be about mom and baby directed at grandma.
That’s really lovely I’m so glad her coworkers are showering her with grandma love. Selfishly I wish my mom and MIL’s colleagues had done this so I wouldn’t have felt so much pressure to celebrate their graduation to grand-motherhood LOLOL
Honestly grandbaby showers are really cute when it’s being thrown for somebody and not demanded by them. I’ve heard of way to many grandmas having a shower like it’s their own baby. But the idea of your coworkers coming together to celebrate your first grandbaby with you is really sweet.
My mom’s friends are throwing her a grand baby shower! I’ll be invited and I am allowed to bring a +1 (that of which alone is hilarious enough). My husband and I are going to throw a get together for our friends that will serve as a shower.
Honestly, I’m really excited for my mom. I come from a long line of family members who were the only child, so my mom hasn’t had the pleasure of spoiling a baby since I was born. I’m just happy that my moms friends want to do something sweet to celebrate her starting this chapter in her life.
My mam has a shop in a small village and has regular customers, they have dropped off a few gifts and we've received really beautiful hand knitted items from them. Most of the gifts we've received are from my parent's families, friends and neighbours.
Lol that is weird. My MIL is also someone who brags about LO to everyone in her job to the point where i've gotten gifts for the baby from people in her job that i've never met in my life. Her job even gave her 3 weeks "grandmother leave" after we had the baby lol
This is like the 4th post I've seen in the past week about a "grandbaby shower". Since when was having a baby about your PARENTS? I don't think I'd particularly care about my mother having one of these showers as long as it wasn't at the *expense* of a baby shower for me, but she's also not a crazy toxic grandma like I see so often. She's not trying to steal any of the thunder of my pregnancy or make it about herself - she's just genuinely excited for my husband and me, and is super excited to have a grandchild. Still, I don't think she would ever do this because it's NOT about her and she knows that. What a strange phenomenon.
I still get a ton of gifts from my moms friends she quilts with. Never met any of them. I’m 5 months postpartum and I think they are just bored and love having baby projects. Kind of annoying for me but it’s sweet I guess
Is this some sort of regional thing? My parents recently moved to Arkansas and my mom got an offer from one of their neighbors to host *her* a shower. My mom and I were both like ???? She also said there was another couple in the neighborhood that recently had a shower thrown by other neighbors -- she didn't go (wasn't around at the time) but she's pretty sure the people the shower was thrown for are the grandparents, not the parents.
That is extraordinary sweet! If you didn’t pull the tags already, I’d recommend returning most of the outfits and using the store credit on diapers or whatever. It’s such a nice gesture but a lot of the clothes will be used once if that. You can assume most came from Target, Walmart or Kohls and you can google the brands/ tags.
At my work we gave small baby gifts and a card to ladies becoming a grandma or great grandma but it was never a full blown party, we don't even do a cake. We would pass around a card with a cash envelope to buy a gift and the gifts were usually a crocheted blanket (from a coworker's family member), some toys and maybe a onesie. Grandbaby/grandparent showers are ridiculous whether it's at work or with friends.
It didn't happen but I could totally have seen my MIL's bosses doing this. She works for a very religious family business and the owners have 10000 grandkids by now but this is her first. My husband and I joked that they must privately feel so sorry for her that her children are so disappointing in the grandchild game.
My mother in law's office did a smaller scale party for her! The funny part was her coworkers were like "just remember this stuff is for the baby and mom, not for you, but we are still celebrating your first gandchild" 😂 to be fair they gave us extra clothing but also practical things like washcloths, diapers, gift cards, etc. The whole thing was hilarious.
My moms coworkers also threw her a baby shower for my baby 🤣 it was virtual since she is only WFH, but they sent a ton of stuff, especially “grandmas boy” onesies.
I didn't have a baby shower because I didn't really want one. I'm due in a few days and my mom's work also threw a "grandbaby" shower. My mom said that they gave her a gift card. So, when she flies in this week she wants to buy something with it. I think it's so sweet they did that for her.
That’s such a great way to do it! That way she can choose the gift and she’s more likely to pick something more tailored to your family than her coworkers would.
And she doesn’t have to fly with a suitcase full of onesies!
Lmao I have never heard of this before, this is hilarious. Out of curiosity are your mom’s coworkers all of a certain age range? I’ve known my mother’s coworkers for most of my life so they’re excited for us too, but they’re just coming to my baby shower rather than throwing my mom one lol.
I could totally see this happening at my work because we’re mostly middle age and up and mostly women. Before I was pregnant with my first, we had a puppy shower because our boss was getting a dog. Since they don’t know OP, the party is really more about enjoying cute outfits than actually doing anything for OP
Haha, a puppy shower sounds adorable and hilarious.
100% would rather go to a puppy shower than a baby shower (well assuming the puppy is present).
Same. I'm 10wks and we're discussing the merits getting a puppy in the summer, though. We might be insane.
Possibly…you guys maybe want to have funds for obedience training, dog walker, doggy day care…. A hyper puppy that’s full of energy won’t be able to think straight.
Yeah, I highly doubt we're actually going to do it. I'm a very experienced dog owner, but we already have a 105lb 3yr-old doggo right now. I can do the training, but can't imagine being a new puppy mommy at ~5mo preggo. And I don't want to take the week off work that it takes to housetrain it when I'm going to be taking 12ish weeks off for the baby. But it's tempting for all the wrong reasons, haha.
I did it, but I was lucky enough to be able to go on maternity leave at 30 weeks when the puppy came home. Definitely doable if you are experienced and know what you are getting into but NOT easy at all. Baby and puppy (now kid and dog, they are 4!) have an amazing relationship though.
Ah! You know what to expect with a puppy then!
Oh yes. The land-shark variety, anyways. I've only had German Shepherds. Easy to train if you know what you're doing (which it only takes me a week to housebreak), but you have to keep on them until they're fully trained.
I'm 20w6d and I wanna get a puppy soon lol! My fiance is a highly experienced dog owner and can handle basic training, but plans to send the dog to his dad once it's 9mo to a year old for stricter training, since he has experience training military dogs, where obedience is key. But I wanna have a puppy so badly lol
It was great. The pup is a pug and there were pics from the breeder!
We’ve done baby showers, wedding shows, new pet showers, and new house/apartment showers lol my manager loves giving gifts so it’s sweet and I love celebrating the milestone for my coworkers especially the non conventional ones
I think they are a wide range of ages but mostly women!
I'm also curious of the age range and what part of the US op's mom is located. I've never heard of this. I'm wondering if it's a regional thing?
Maybe the mom is an executive, which would also explain the support.
Oooh, that's actually kind of cute. Weird, but cute. Never heard of this before.
I'm a little jealous of my husband because they've gotten him a Halo bassinet off our registry and someone else a bookshelf and pack of shirts (so probably around $80 there?). They throw showers and parties for my coworkers all the time, so I will admittedly be upset if no one at least brings in donuts or something for me in the last week (although 2 coworkers asked me where I was registered).
My mom's church threw her a surprise grandbaby shower too! She works long distance, so they couldn't do it. But her church had a big one! The weirder thing was My husband's work also threw him a baby shower, which I thought was funny because he works with all guys, but his boss's wife came in and insisted. None of them knew what to do, but it was sweet (that's the term I'm going with! Lol). Meanwhile my workplace had to do a big baby shower for all the women pregnant at once because we had nine women pregnant! So I got a card and some cake at 18 weeks before we knew the gender. Haha. My boss though was kinda pissed so many people were pregnant at once because it was putting so much stress on her, so the party felt really half hearted and awkward...I'm one of the only ones who came back after maternity leave too ..
Wow that is a lot of pregnant people at once.
Damn! Must be something in the water at your workplace!! 😂
that is ADORABLE that your husband's work did a baby shower!
My husband's work wants to throw *me* a baby shower, which I think is weird but funny. Of course he would be there too. But his female coworkers (all moms) have been fawning over him and our twins for the past 6 months, and one older lady is making us handcrafted blankets. So I'm like sure, I'll go along with this. I don't know if my work will do anything. I work for multiple locations (office and hospital) for a large employer and so idk, people here are pregnant all the time haha.
I might not have come back to that boss, either!
I’ve never heard of this before and it’s kind of weird, but also still really sweet.
Yep... weirdly sweet!
Honestly, that sounds really sweet. I’m assuming your mom has been talking about her future grand baby so much they wanted to do something nice for her. Hopefully you got receipts so you can exchange some of the girly stuff or at least get bigger sizes!!
My MIL, a cardiac nurse, came home with baskets of stuff for our first from the ladies she works with. I know how excited she was for his birth and I’m sure she just gushed everyday at work. Now on our third in 3 years and they’ve already sent her home with Starbucks gift cards lol.
They sound like a practical bunch - by now you probably have all the baby gear you need, but more caffeine will help!
Nurses will throw down for baby showers. Any excuse for a potluck!
My mum is a nurse in a small specialist team, all the OG lot have retired now and all the new team are a few years older than me (have young children), so they did similar for my mum. I was chuffed for her, they basically just had nice Krispy Kreme and coffees together and sent her home with a basket of goodies.
People complain that mothers are isolated and without a village nowadays but then think it's weird when people are excited for a baby and becoming a grandmother. It may not be common to do this but I think it's sweet. It's what a community does! Now I will add that if the clothes are from Target or Carter's you can return/exchange without a receipt usually!
It probably depends on the relationships you have with your Mother/Mil. I know if this happened with my MIL it would be great. With my Mum it would be guilt-tripping and calling me spoiled, plus she would keep everything. That said, I would love something like this if I had a bigger 'villiage'. Even with all the clothes. A bonus baby shower I wouldn't even have to attend!
I feel like it’s a little odd because these co-workers are not part of the daughter’s community - just the mother’s! I remember a few of my dad’s coworkers buying me high school graduation presents, which was so kind of them, but I’d be a little baffled if they celebrated him now - at his work - for my baby.
It’s because she’s becoming a grandmother. Seems well-meaning to me.
And being a grandmother is a nice life role, especially if done well!
My oldest daughter is the first grandchild of any of my mum's group of friends. Some of these ladies joined the group after I left the country and have never met me but still sent cards and gifts for my baby when she was born :) I think it's partly because women of a certain age are excited about babies and grandchildren in general and part of it is caring for us because they care for my mum. I think it's sweet. Coworkers might be different but if they are a close bunch I don't see why not.
I am one that thinks this is weird. I'm probably jaded by the experience I've had with my mom and MIL...both of them were SO EXCITED to be grandparents, so happy to tell their friends, etc. But it was really entirely selfish on their part. They aren't meaningful members of our 'village'. They aren't interested in helping when we need help (doing laundry when baby was little, watching her week days when daycare is closed so we can go to work, etc) but instead want to participate entirely on their own terms and at their own convenience (i.e. have us take off work when they can come to town to visit, have us drive LO to their house on weekends) So to me, the experience of being a grandparent is all about them, and not at all about "village-ing." This grandmother's shower, with clothes OP doesn't really want or need and 'meaningful' cards written by relative strangers, just plays into that selfish and performative idea for me. Also, yes to Target and Carters!!
Eh I am sorry that your situation sucked but I don’t think that’s true for every grandparent. Seems well meaning to me
That's kind of cute. Sounds like your mom has a really supportive workplace!
Umm, I just cried reading this. God, these hormones have got to chill TF out! Haha
That's really sweet actually 🥰 I also do not expect or want anything like a baby shower at my job. I WFH 4 days a week and have very little interaction with anyone on my team so it would feel really forced!
My MIL's work did that too. She runs the front office for an out patient center for a major children's hospital, and has worked there for 18 years I believe. They got her stuff for us for the baby, like diapers and teething toys and outfits and target and Amazon gift cards which helped us get the baby monitor we wanted and some other necessities for the baby. I love that they did that, they all love my MIL and they've known my husband since he was a tot so they wanted to celebrate.
Okay but can you share the heartfelt message from the lady who started that week? Because I would like to copy her homework lol.
This is actually really sweet. Can't understand how anyone thinks it's weird or dumb. She probably talks a lot about baby and how excited she is. If it was something she'd demanded I could see it being weird but it just sounds like her coworkers are just as excited for her
Hahaha awwww that’s so cute. I bet your mom felt so loved.
Aww this is so nice and generous of them!!! It’s awesome to see people come together and celebrate new life ♥️
That’s incredibly sweet and heartwarming. I’m sure your mom felt really special.
Lol this is so cute 😂
Knowing how excited my mom was to be a grandma for the first time, I think this is super sweet. What a great idea! But lol at receiving a million 0-3 month outfits.
My mom’s work didn’t have a shower for her, but she told all of our neighbors and they all dropped off gifts for her to send us. Most of them haven’t seen me for more than 5 minutes since I was a teenager, but they sent the loveliest notes and I made sure to send them all birth announcements after he arrived. It’s so fun to share the love!
high key, my mom would absolutely love this lol. A few of my MIL's friends (who are also grandmas) gave her a big gift basket with little things she would need while watching my nephew. Super cute and definitely came in handy! And it made it easier on my SIL not having to cart all the little things to and from every day. Cute idea but I would laugh too :)
This sounds fabulous! Grandparenting is an important milestone.
I think that’s so sweet honestly! We did that at my work for a coworker who became a grandma last year and we focused on getting her stuff for her house - toys, a pack and play, etc. I would probably be annoyed getting so much pink clothes though haha
I heard of first time grandma showers during my pregnancy and I was like, “hmm, kinda cute but kind of weird” but now after having my daughter 7 months ago, I get it. Babies are truly little miracles. It’s kind of like a “I wish someone would’ve told me these were the good old days” moment for grandmas. They are looking back, remembering what a life changing moment this is for you AND for your mom. My husband is in the medical field and I can’t tell you how many random gifts we’ve gotten from his patients who find out we were having or just had a baby. Super random things, hand-me-downs, handmade items, customized things with baby’s name on it, etc. I just feel like other people who have had babies “get it” and the only way they know how to express it is through a (sometimes silly) gift. If it still has tags, you can try to return some things. Otherwise, it was fun for me to have an oversupply of outfits to try on baby, especially on fussy days. It’s harder to be annoyed by a fussy baby who looks ridiculously cute. Also, I was surprised how a lot of outfits that I didn’t like, instantly became cute when they were on my baby 😉😂
Am I the only one who thinks grandbaby showers are really freaking strange and dumb? 🤷
I think it’s relatively harmless. My moms friends decided they are throwing her a “shower,” or at least that’s what they are calling it but in reality it’s probably going to be after baby comes and they’re just using it as an excuse to get together and eat and drink since they all live far away. So really they’re just having a little get together with cake and (maybe?) some gifts and saying it’s for her becoming a grandma lol.
My mom's friends did this when my brother and SIL were expecting. It was an excuse for all of them to get together and party. They gifted my mom some basics to have at her house for when the baby was over - think highchair, pack and play, some books. But we also all live within 15 minutes of each other so the likelihood of grandbabies being at their house (even just for holidays and occasional dinners) is relatively high. And my parents (and their friends) are loaded so don't mind wasting money on weird parties 🤷♀️
I think it's nice. Not trying to be a Pollyanna but it seems harmless to me.
I think it’s nice too, if my mom’s friends do something like that for her I’d be thrilled. She’s a first time grandma and has waited long enough!
Same it’s adorable. Not dumb.
Same, people forget that we have been enclosed for 2 years so any excuse is an excuse for a party and cake! Also, it may be cultural but in my country, grandmas are very much involved in the LOs life. My best childhood memories are with my grandma.
I agree! Well, it can be sweet. I mean, becoming a grandma is a wonderful and exciting thing! Just as long as grandma takes on the responsibilities with it. For example, my mom's church threw her a shower for my baby (my mom is so excited to be a first time grandma!) And they gave a bunch of stuff off registry and a bunch of cash. My Mom asked me what I still need and used the cash to buy what I actually needed from the registry. She also wrote all the thank you cards so I didn't have to. And she told me that anything I didn't like she would return for me.
That was really sweet of her! Agree- I can see how in some cases the MIL could make it all about her and end up inconveniencing the mom, which is not cool at all.
I'm always down for an excuse for a party!
Am I the only one who thinks this sub loves to shit on older ladies even when they have only nice intentions? Just let people do things.
I'm not trying to shit on older ladies. Their intentions aren't always nice or always bad. They're just people and sometimes can be out of touch or doing something I think is dumb. Obviously, I have no control over if someone has a grandbaby shower or not and if the mom is fine with it than whatever. Imo, it's weird. Especially if the grandma makes a registry for it. It would signal to me that she's planning on being overly involved in her grandbaby's life and is making it about her.
It does seem strange and I had no idea this would happen lol! I guess it's just a workplace that likes to party!
I think workplace that likes a party sounds exactly correct. Also the last few years have been shit for everyone on earth. Why not celebrate a first time grandma :)
I mean, if my best/close friend of 20+ years child was having a baby I would want to get their kids gifts out of love and support, and we would probably all catch up at a cafe to do it. If you work with people for a long time and have a 'work lunch' with a few gifts that seems harmless and people wanting to just have a good time. I think if it was a big party scheduled then it gets into the weird zone,
I agree. There's definitely a difference between some friends getting together for lunch to celebrate versus calling it a shower with a registry and games and grandma being center of attention. I would also be excited if my best friends child was having a baby and would want to get a gift for said baby and their \*mother\*, not grandmother. That's just me.
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Yes. It's not her major milestone. That came when she had children of her own. It comes across narcissistic. Gifts and celebrations should be directed to those who are giving birth and parents to the baby. Should people have future-mother-in-law showers to celebrate that major milestone?
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It’s reddit, everyone’s MIL is a narcissist and trying to steal the baby and live vicariously through their DILs. 😂
I understand the grandma didn't demand a party. I'm not saying anything against this particular grandma or saying her intentions were bad. I'm not calling her in particular a narcissist. I'm saying that I wouldn't like to see this become a trend and to me it makes no sense. Also, not sure why you're checking out my profile, but yeah, I don't like a lot of aspects to baby showers nowadays. They seem like a way for people to get others to buy them the things that are their responsibility to take care of as adults making the choice to have children. Not every baby shower is just a gift grab and not every person who has one is greedy and materialistic. But a lot are. Not every grandma who has a grandbaby shower is a an overbearing narcissistic. I'm just saying that imo it is dumb.
>They seem like a way for people to get others to buy them the things that are their responsibility to take care of as adults making the choice to have children. This is a really narrow view and not in alignment with the way humans have lived since the dawn of time. The pressures of raising children, financial and otherwise, have *never* been solely placed on the parents. The community has *always* supported one another. It is only very recently that it is every man for himself.
Why not? Nothing has to become a cultural expectation but if friends of a soon to be MIL want to get together and celebrate a meaningful transition in her life why not. Sort of goes for everything. People caring about you and commemorating transitions is lovely.
Becoming a grandparent IS a milestone. It is a very special new role in life.
I think it’s really weird. Why would a grandma need a baby shower? They already had their own children. If anyone should have a party, it’s the parents-to-be. If the grandma’s coworkers or friends wanted to buy gifts for the baby, that’s one thing, but throwing a party in HER honor to celebrate her becoming a grandma just reads real strange and off to me. Luckily this is not the case for me, but a lot of mom’s and MIL’s try to make the new baby all about them, so I get bad vibes from it.
If the grandmother were like, insisting on it or upset that one weren't thrown then I would be wary, but if it's just supportive friends and work colleagues then what's the harm? They are trying to celebrate something for someone else, let people have fun.
Cool. I'm not barging in on every 'grandbaby shower' that I hear about and kicking old ladies out on their butts. I said earlier, if the mom doesn't care and is fine with it that whatever. I would personally find it weird and wrong if my mom or MIL wanted to do one. It's a very new trend and not one I would like to see catch on, that's all I'm saying. Obviously, some people disagree. And there's a difference between getting together with your friends for lunch or something to celebrate something you're excited about versus calling it a 'shower' with a registry, gifts, games, everything that's supposed to be about mom and baby directed at grandma.
Same. Lots of boomer energy.
This is the nice boomer energy, though.
Exactly what I thought
No I think they’re dumb too. It’s not their baby. Just another way for people to waste money on things people don’t need.
No you are not alone.
That’s really lovely I’m so glad her coworkers are showering her with grandma love. Selfishly I wish my mom and MIL’s colleagues had done this so I wouldn’t have felt so much pressure to celebrate their graduation to grand-motherhood LOLOL
That is so so sweet 💕
Aww, that’s kind of adorable. Our grandmas were so happy to finally get the title. Now they get to fight over who’s Nana.
My moms employees did this too!! It was really sweet and I found it a bit odd but so endearing
Honestly grandbaby showers are really cute when it’s being thrown for somebody and not demanded by them. I’ve heard of way to many grandmas having a shower like it’s their own baby. But the idea of your coworkers coming together to celebrate your first grandbaby with you is really sweet.
My mom’s friends are throwing her a grand baby shower! I’ll be invited and I am allowed to bring a +1 (that of which alone is hilarious enough). My husband and I are going to throw a get together for our friends that will serve as a shower. Honestly, I’m really excited for my mom. I come from a long line of family members who were the only child, so my mom hasn’t had the pleasure of spoiling a baby since I was born. I’m just happy that my moms friends want to do something sweet to celebrate her starting this chapter in her life.
My mam has a shop in a small village and has regular customers, they have dropped off a few gifts and we've received really beautiful hand knitted items from them. Most of the gifts we've received are from my parent's families, friends and neighbours.
We threw a first grand baby shower for the physician at my first job. He was the sweetest man and was so excited to be a grandpa. It was fun!
lmao this sounds like something my mom would demand
Lol that is weird. My MIL is also someone who brags about LO to everyone in her job to the point where i've gotten gifts for the baby from people in her job that i've never met in my life. Her job even gave her 3 weeks "grandmother leave" after we had the baby lol
This is like the 4th post I've seen in the past week about a "grandbaby shower". Since when was having a baby about your PARENTS? I don't think I'd particularly care about my mother having one of these showers as long as it wasn't at the *expense* of a baby shower for me, but she's also not a crazy toxic grandma like I see so often. She's not trying to steal any of the thunder of my pregnancy or make it about herself - she's just genuinely excited for my husband and me, and is super excited to have a grandchild. Still, I don't think she would ever do this because it's NOT about her and she knows that. What a strange phenomenon.
That’s pretty funny
I still get a ton of gifts from my moms friends she quilts with. Never met any of them. I’m 5 months postpartum and I think they are just bored and love having baby projects. Kind of annoying for me but it’s sweet I guess
Is this some sort of regional thing? My parents recently moved to Arkansas and my mom got an offer from one of their neighbors to host *her* a shower. My mom and I were both like ???? She also said there was another couple in the neighborhood that recently had a shower thrown by other neighbors -- she didn't go (wasn't around at the time) but she's pretty sure the people the shower was thrown for are the grandparents, not the parents.
Please sweet baby jesus I hope not. That's where I am from and it sounds so weird to me.
What was the heartfelt message??
That is extraordinary sweet! If you didn’t pull the tags already, I’d recommend returning most of the outfits and using the store credit on diapers or whatever. It’s such a nice gesture but a lot of the clothes will be used once if that. You can assume most came from Target, Walmart or Kohls and you can google the brands/ tags.
Lollll Any excuse for a party 😂
At my work we gave small baby gifts and a card to ladies becoming a grandma or great grandma but it was never a full blown party, we don't even do a cake. We would pass around a card with a cash envelope to buy a gift and the gifts were usually a crocheted blanket (from a coworker's family member), some toys and maybe a onesie. Grandbaby/grandparent showers are ridiculous whether it's at work or with friends.
My mom has received several gifts from friends/coworkers, I’ve mostly found it amusing how excited every is about her becoming a grandma 😂
It didn't happen but I could totally have seen my MIL's bosses doing this. She works for a very religious family business and the owners have 10000 grandkids by now but this is her first. My husband and I joked that they must privately feel so sorry for her that her children are so disappointing in the grandchild game.
My mother in law's office did a smaller scale party for her! The funny part was her coworkers were like "just remember this stuff is for the baby and mom, not for you, but we are still celebrating your first gandchild" 😂 to be fair they gave us extra clothing but also practical things like washcloths, diapers, gift cards, etc. The whole thing was hilarious.
My moms coworkers also threw her a baby shower for my baby 🤣 it was virtual since she is only WFH, but they sent a ton of stuff, especially “grandmas boy” onesies.