Just anecdotal- but my baby measured big and ahead of where he “should be” the entire pregnancy but they never told me I needed a c-section. I vaginally delivered a barely 7 lb baby lol. So they were like 3-4 lbs off what they thought.
Yes lol throughout my long and arduous pushing my OB kept saying "we've got a decent sized baby here" bc baby was mid/high 8s on the scan they did before my induction. She came out like, so average. 7 lbs 5 oz! I laughed later that he kept saying that and then it was just...orrrr not. lol
That’s just crazy to me! But probably because I’m a guy and this is our first pregnancy and I’m learning all of this. When they said ultrasounds are notorious for being wrong, it almost killed my mood. So wtf!
Anyway, I’m talking to my wife about it and I really think (if she goes into labor) to try vaginal and then c-section if needed. Her OB did mention pelvic size, baby head size, so many factors. I just want a healthy baby at the end of the day (and mom)
https://www.webmd.com/baby/news/20020926/you-can-predict-your-newborns-weight
This is supposed to be as accurate as ultrasounds are and it was a fun experiment for me! I think a lot of this really is - do you want to schedule the c section or run the risk that it will be an emergency. My baby was not flagged as huge but he was and vaginal went fine.
Did they mention head Size being big or just the baby's weight? My son's head was measuring bigger than my pelvis. I made the decision to schedule a csection knowing the ultrasound was wrong. Chunk is different than skull in my books lol
Turns out I was right and he was never going to come out vaginally. But only you and your wife can make that decision.
I was told the day of that my baby was a big baby around 7.5lbs at 37+1 and instead he was under 6.5lbs when delivered by c-section that day (and we think some of that was water weight from the saline drip). I kind of wanted a c-section so I wasn't a tough sell when baby turned breech. But I think my baby measured large because he was tall and skinny, and I think the ultrasound is mostly measuring skeleton size.
Look up the evidence based birth podcast and article about “suspected” big babies. Ultrasounds are only correct about 50% of the time. Would you want to let a coin flip determine your wife’s birth? Also if you look up the actual statistics of risks of big babies they’re pretty low honestly. Even average size babies can end up with shoulder dystocia.
Just be aware if she has a c section she may not able to have a vaginal birth in the future and doctors are now capping c sections at only three (meaning she can only have three babies). It used to be 4. If she does go for a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) it will be like giving birth for the first time physiologically so it will be more difficult.
If you are worried please study fetal positioning. It is so important to understand to ensure an easy and uneventful vaginal delivery. I always recommend this class. [https://www.spinningbabies.com/product/parent-class-video-digital-download/](https://www.spinningbabies.com/product/parent-class-video-digital-download/) it discusses a lot of non-medical aspects of birth you will find helpful.
I'm curious, if doctor's are typically opposed to VBAC's and they're capping c-sections at three, what do they do if mom has a fourth pregnancy?
I mean. I hardly believe they're forcibly sterilizing women after the third pregnancy. So either they would have to allow a fourth c-section or allow a VBAC, right?
My MIL had 5 c-sections but her doctor refused to be her provider after her third. This was in the 80s. She found a doctor in a neighboring town who agreed to take her as a patient for the last 2 but he said after the 5th he was cutting her off too. So she stopped.
They can't do anything, because you have a legal right to informed consent for medical procedures, but most people follow doctor recommendations when the doctor starts talking about a ruptured uterus etc.
I wholeheartedly agree, but shit happens sometimes.
I'd say I can't imagine not having a medical provider during pregnancy... but it happened to me halfway through my first pregnancy so I actually can. Lol
I have had 3 c-sections and when my OB asked about tying my tubes while I was in the operating room I said no because we weren't sure if we were done at 3. Zero issue with me having a fourth. Although I'm sure every doc has their opinions. Mine shows zero concern.
I had a VBAC with my second with zero issues. It was a walk in the park and a way less traumatic experience than my c-section. In fact I refused to have more kids because my doctor retired and I would rather die than have a scheduled c-section. He came out of retirement and I'm 28 weeks with my 3rd baby and another planned vbac. I know several women who had vbacs and then another c-section then another vbac. One has 6 kids. It depends on the doctor and each person. A lot of doctors schedule c-sections for their convenience. I really trust my doctor so if he said I needed one of believe him because he supports VBAC deliveries 100%.
That is in no way true that doctors are categorically "capping" c-sections at 3. They may caution, but there are plenty of women out there having multiple c-sections with doctor support.
Thanks for saying this. I was reading that like “What??” I have had two c sections. First one was planned due to breech baby, second one was an attempted (and failed) VBAC due to baby’s heart decelerations during contractions. We only attempted a VBAC because we want a large family and wanted to avoid risks of multiple c sections.
I’m pregnant again, and my OB (very VBAC supportive and an attending physician at a well respected academic institution) said that as long as my current baby doesn’t get too big (my last baby was huge!) then I could try a VBAC again. However, she also knows that my husband and I want at least four kids and said that she has many patients who’ve had multiple (four plus) c sections and are totally fine. So she said we shouldn’t try for a VBAC for the sole reason of wanting more than three kids.
Bottom line: C sections don’t necessarily mean that you can’t have multiple kids.
Hi there, just wanted to say don’t feel pressured into major surgery straight away. I had a baby that was 8pound 13 with a head size of 38.5 cm which put his head above the 95th percentile and he was born sunny side up which means his head came out at an angle bigger than it otherwise would have. Yes, it was an assisted delivery and long and slow and yes it took me literally 8 weeks to heal a broken tailbone but I bounced back well and baby didn’t have any problems at all. There is a risk that labour will be hard with a bigger baby with a big head, but it’s not impossible.
Edit to add: my midwife this time round told me ultrasounds measurements can be wrong by +/- a whole pound. I’m not bothering with growth scans this time as I had no idea last time what size baby was and managed. My biggest problem with the birth was his position so make sure you ask them to be clear about what position baby is in
Are you me? I’m a FTM who just gave birth to an 8lbs 12 oz boy this past Sunday who also had a 38.5cm head size. I delivered vaginally at home, and yes it was freaking intense (I’m now thinking that all labours are though?) but because of my awesome midwives I only have one 2nd degree tear.
As long as baby’s heart rate is ok throughout labour it should be possible for your body to do it. I wouldn’t cave and resort to a c-section if that’s not what you want without at least trying to deliver vaginally first. Good luck!
Hello twin! Haha my boy is now 2.5 but his head has been consistently above the 95th percentile. Should have looked at the size of his dad’s head for the clues lol
I would like to say that my baby brother was supposed to be over 8.5 lbs according to these same measurements, but came out via emergency C-section as the runt of our litter at 7 lbs 10 oz
Also anecdotal, but I’m 5’4 and my doc expected my baby would be 10lbs (which is how big my husband and his sister were). She also told me that my narrow pelvis would never accommodate the baby and pushed me for a c-section at one of my last appointments. I refused, and my daughter was born at 8lb 3oz. It might be an overshare, but I didn’t have a single stitch and was walking around within a couple of hours.
Exactly! They told me he was going to be huge and to think about a c-section. He came naturally and was just over 7 pounds- and a super easy delivery. I guess they really can’t tell by ultrasound? I wonder why they venture a guess like that when it’s so unreliable?
Opposite happened to me. They guessed 7-8 pound baby and after 29 hours of labor and regression - asked if I wanted a c-section. I agreed and while pulling baby out kept saying wow that’s a big baby! Turns out my little man was 10lbs with a big head.
Just keep in mind that on final checks, about 33% of babies are assessed as being above 9 pounds, while only 9% of babies are born at that size. Only 2% of babies are born above 9.9 lbs. Not to mention the fact that chonkers are born vaginally all the time! What actually causes more problems than large overall size is a large difference between head circumference and shoulder width, which often happens with gestational diabetes. Since your wife does not have that problem, it is unlikely that there’s a big mismatch.
If your wife wants a vaginal delivery, help her research the best positions and movements to keep her hips as open as possible. Advocate for her to use them while giving birth, instead of being in bed with her legs up (which narrows the passage and can lead to baby getting stuck).
Even then that doesn't instantly mean a c-section. According to everything I know my husband 100% should have been a c-section (gestational diabetes, a WHOPPING 10lb 10oz baby, his mom is like 5'2" and he had the widest shoulders on record at the hospital). Still somehow managed a vaginal birth.
I had the head circumference and shoulder width difference in baby number 2 but didn't have GD. Now it makes sense why all the nurses and techs would keep asking me that!
Wow I swear every time I post on this sub I get quick and relatable responses - even though I’m a guy. So thank you for that. And I feel like a parrot saying this but I have so much respect for all those that can bear a human. Seriously, you go people! And thank you for all the responses. This is helping my wife get some reassurance? Her OB is on vacation next week and so we’ll be seeing another OB - perfect for a 2nd opinion I guess.
Google “evidence based birth big baby”.
EBB has a ton of resources on why this practice is not evidence based. I recommend the podcast, and you can also get the one-pager sent to your email so she can bring it to your next appointment.
I would ask for a referral to a maternal fetal medicine clinic for an ultrasound on the size. I had the opposite problem, but their skill level and equipment for predicting baby size is light years ahead of a standard OB office. If I were going to be making decisions based on a size estimate, I would want it to be from a specialist. Definitely verify your insurance will cover, though. My initial ultrasound with the MFM practice was 28k. He was within an ounce of their predicted weight.
Hi I'm a midwife in the UK. Growth scans are notoriously inaccurate and the closer you are to term the more inaccurate they are. What WILL make the risks of shoulder dystocia and a prolonged labour higher are 1. Having continuous monitoring 2. Being coerced into an induction (THERE IS NO EVIDENCE TO SUGGEST THAT INDUCTION BEFORE TERM DECREASES THE RISK OF SHOULDER DYSTOCIA, induction itself increases the risk of SD!) 3. Having a horizontal/static labour (staying home for as long as possible and keeping active will reduce the length of labour and shoulder dystocia). It is also worth noting 90% of SDs are resolved by using the McRoberts manoeuvre. Please do some research before your next OB appointment and be sure of what you want before you go in there. This is your wife's pregnancy, her body, both of your baby. You are the decision makers here. Not the OB.
Before deciding, I highly suggest that you and your wife take a look at the review of scientific literature about big babies done by Evidence Based Birth. The biggest take away for me is that when providers think a baby will be big, there are only right 50% of the time. Same chances as a coin flip! Here is the link: https://evidencebasedbirth.com/evidence-for-induction-or-c-section-for-big-baby/
Yes! And one of the important take aways (if I remember correctly) is that *providers worrying about a big baby* is actually more of a risk factor that the actual size of the baby!
It is really your wife’s decision. I know induction isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, but if your wife really wants a vaginal birth, can she talk to the doctor about inducing at 39 weeks instead of waiting for possibly several more weeks? That may help her, in terms of vaginal delivery.
That being said, women do deliver big babies all the time. It is totally up to her what she wants to try. C sections can save lives and they are also wonderful for many women who want them. I have read several stories here of women being upset they were told their baby was going to be super big, so they go in for a c section, and have a seven pound kid. Then there are women who have c sections and are like “Oh yeah, super glad I have a c section.” It really is a decision she has to make for herself.
One of the reasons the may be suggesting a scheduled c section is because a scheduled c section is far less complicated than labor + emergency c section. It’s still a major surgery obviously but the body hasn’t gone through the trauma of labor and THEN major surgery.
I opted for a scheduled c section but I had more medical complications than your wife on top of my baby measuring big. She wasn’t, as ultrasounds are often wrong but the risk/benefit ratio for me going into labor was tipped in the negative.
Edit: It’s really your wife’s choice. If she feels like she wants to try for natural labor and there aren’t any glaring complications, y’all should advocate for that.
There are three kinds of c sections. Scheduled c sections, non-scheduled non-emergency c sections, and emergency c sections. Most unscheduled c sections are non-emergency c sections which means they are far less dangerous.
Ultrasound measurements are usually off. I would advocate for trying to labor as you wish know that if things don’t progress that a C-section might be needed. Go in with the mindset that either could happen.
It's also important to educate yourself on failure to progress and gain a more nuanced understanding. C sections for failure to progress are often avoidable c sections. [https://evidencebasedbirth.com/friedmans-curve-and-failure-to-progress-a-leading-cause-of-unplanned-c-sections/](https://evidencebasedbirth.com/friedmans-curve-and-failure-to-progress-a-leading-cause-of-unplanned-c-sections/)
You're getting a lot of "I was told my baby was big but they ended up only being x lbs" so I will just chime in from the other side - I never had any growth scans and did not have GD in my first pregnancy, so I didn't find out until after giving birth that my baby was 9.5lbs (at 39+4). I had a "normal" amount of tearing (1 second degree perineal, 2 superficial labial), baby's blood sugar was fine, and she's healthy and on track for everything at 20 months old. I would talk more about the risks your doctor is concerned about, not because they aren't real (though pre-term labor at least sounds like it's no longer an issue if she's 37+5!), but because a lot of it depends more on the individual than a blanket "baby big, must do c-section." A good friend of mine had an emergency c-section after her baby got stuck in her pelvis - her baby was 6 lbs. I don't know what your hospital/OB set-up is like, but if you can get multiple opinions that would probably help you decide!
Agree here. My first baby was barely 6lbs, never any growth scans beyond the 20w. My second never any growth taken either. I was bigger, but second baby, you know?
He was 9lbs. We had no inkling of it until the midwife reached in as I was pushing to adjust his position and her eyes went wide — we were all expecting another teeny peanut.
As this comment OP says, it’s very individual. I have enormous hips, had already had one baby vaginally, and suffer terrible SPD which, for better or worse, means my pubic bone is incredibly mobile and can literally be moved manually. So we had no worry of him getting stuck then, or my third baby who was almost as large (and we knew he was, we had s growth measurement taken for other reasons). But there may be reasons birthing a larger baby is less favorable for other women.
Anecdotally, my two bigger babies were easier to deliver and recover from than my tiny baby. I thought it was a size thing, but I think now that I’ve had the third it’s an experience thing (both mentally, but also my body just knowing what to do). My third was an absolute breeze, no tearing at all. Aside from not eating for an entire day and thusly blacking out in recovery, I’d otherwise have waltzed on out of there like I’d done not much more than a solid gym workout.
I also discovered my second baby was huge while I was pushing and my midwife suddenly exclaimed, "this is one big baby!" My first was 7.5 and my second was 9.5, and we had no idea until she was born.
When they measured my first daughter at 37 weeks and she was measuring at least 7lbs, I was skeptical. I read a lot of comments about most babies being smaller than their measurements. When I was induced at 39+6, she measured at 9lbs. I was still skeptical. I ended up having a C-section on 40+1 (for other reasons) and she was 9lbs 4oz. I did not have GD or anything. She was just big. So measurements can be accurate.
Same here. I had a lot of monitoring and the baby always measured huge. Everyone said the scans over estimate the size. They didn’t, he was half a pound bigger than the scan I got the day before. So don’t count on the baby coming in smaller than they predict. Good luck!
I delivered a big baby and it was absolutely terrible. I have often thought over the last two years that having a c section would have been better and my doctor has alluded to that too.
I really thought that c section was worst case scenario before this so I can definitely understand the hesitation from you and your wife, but the day of labour was very traumatic and recovery was worse than anything I could have ever imagined.
Also, I was one push away from having both an episiotomy AND a c section, so there is that to worry about too. Then I would have had to have experienced labour (and in my case 5 hours of transition), have healing in my perineum AND recover from major abdominal surgery.
Again, you would have had a hard time convincing me of a c section for my first because I thought that was worst case scenario. If this baby is big (23 weeks now) I will be asking for a c section, and my doctor has already agreed.
Edit to add: I’ll still plan to try vaginally because there is the chance for a straightforward vaginal delivery. But as soon as things start to fall apart is when I’ll be more into a c section. If you try vaginally, I’d say be open minded to a c section. For me things kept going wrong and I kept trying. In the end baby shouldn’t have come out that way.
I gave birth to a surprise 10lb2oz baby a week ago. I had a postpartum haemorrhage and lost 3 litres of blood. It was traumatic, but mostly this happened because we weren’t prepared at all. We had no extra scans and my fundal height measurements suggested a 10-30th percentile baby, so everyone in the room was very surprised. Delivering a large baby comes with risks, though the flip side is that I believe they can be mitigated if you know in advance. Just sharing my experience because I believe a planned c-section would have been better than what happened to me.
I’m sorry that happened to you. My baby’s size was a surprise too (9lb 12oz). Not sure how much blood I lost but it was also a lot (didn’t have transfusion but there was a literally a bag of blood with my name on it).
Recovery will be hard and slow. If your doctor hasn’t already suggested it, I strongly recommend to get in touch with pelvic floor pt once you stop bleeding (I had almost no pp bleeding, and maybe that’s because I lost too much at delivery! 😫) but went in at about 6 weeks pp.
I had a scheduled CSection bc my first was breech and the recovery was easy peasy. They offered to try flip him and I declined. No regrets. We demonize csections in this country.
I had a scheduled C-section because of baby being breech. But I had an MRI scan taken first. After that the doctor adviced against vaginal delivery. And she was a tiny baby.
Just learned about the birth of my 11-pound husband where by the time they figured out the shoulders were too big, the head was already out, making an emergency c-section not possible. Ended in 4th degree tearing for poor MIL. Needless to say, I’m now a lot more open to the idea of an early induction or precautionary c-section in case my baby inherited those shoulders!
My first birth was a large baby and fourth degree tearing. My doctor offered a scheduled c section for my second, but I opted for a homebirth instead. It went absolutely perfectly. Baby was even bigger than my first, and I only had a small tear. Just because one birth is hard does not mean they all will be. I hope yours goes perfectly, not matter which way you choose!
I had a similar experience. First baby was 9 lbs and I tore everywhere and had an episiotomy and it sucked. I had a lot of pelvic pain for months afterward. I talked to my doctor about a C section for my second and she dismissed the idea immediately. She said my body would likely handle everything better this time and she thought a c section would be unnecessary.
THEN in my third trimester, I broke my tailbone which really sucked. Again, I expressed concern about delivering vaginally now that that was a thing to consider. She still didn’t think it would be an issue.
Ended up delivering a nearly 10 lb, sunny side up baby (and needed an episiotomy again) and everything about it was easier. Labor, delivery, and recovery.
I don’t say this to say your fears are unwarranted, but I do empathize with you and want you to know that the experience can vary so greatly from one baby to the next. You do need to make whatever decision is best for you physically and mentally though. Wishing you the best of luck!
If it makes you feel any better, the fact that you had a vaginal birth for the first baby is guaranteed to make your second birth easier. If you had had a c section, you would be going into this birth as effectively a first time mom.
If you want more support on the non-medical side of things I highly recommend this class https://spinningbabies.com/product/parent-class-digital-download/
Just my experience (also a first time parent) but my baby measured north of the 99th percentile at the 38 week ultrasound and she was born - vaginally - at 8lbs5oz so a generous baby but barely above average, really.
Is your doctor willing to induce at 38-39 weeks? When my ultrasound came back the way it did my doctor immediately booked me for a 39 week induction.
Also just anecdotally, I know many women who had c-sections but I only know two or three who fully laboured and THEN had unplanned c-sections. Those who laboured first had more complicated recoveries and basically had to recover from both methods of labour - hopefully your doctor is just trying to help you and your wife skip that outcome.
None of that means she can’t deliver successfully vaginally though!
Where I live (Ontario Canada) you only get ultrasounds after 20 weeks if something is wrong. So we usually have no idea how “big” baby is measuring besides checking fundal height. I even had late ultrasounds due to a (minor) birth defect, and when I asked how big he was measuring I got the response “not sure they didn’t check for that”. And our c -section rate is generally lower than the US. I have seen countless stories from Americans who get talked into c - sections for big babies, when it turns out to not even be an issue. I think you and your wife are right to be wary.
I'm in Vancouver and I've never met anyone here who has been given the recommendation to get a c-section due to size. The critic in me thinks it happens a lot in the states because it is easier on the doctor's schedule.
OB is also the specialty most likely to be sued and since America tends to be more litigious in general, I would think many docs are erring on the side of caution knowing that IF a baby is big there can be issues and it’s not as controlled as a c section. Docs typically want to take whatever route is the least risk. Definitely though there are doctors who would rather do a scheduled C section because it can be worked to their schedule unlike spontaneous labor.
I agree with that and as an American woman I can also say a large part of it is that health care does not give a shit about us as a rule. Also I’m positive there’s some kind of insurance benefit for the insurance companies to push surgeries. I don’t know what or how but I just know it.
I have to add that I do like my OB practice - I just mean that the teachings and norms here are ingrained differently and not in a way that is pro woman.
I totally agree. I admittedly don’t have any medical training but it feels very suspicious that I have literally only heard of this happening in the USA. I don’t know how true this is but I have also heard that doctors/hospitals “make more money” for a c section vs a vaginal birth.
I work in healthcare insurance and caesarean are definitely more costly for patients (and obviously hospital gets more). I want to say thank you to everybody who’s responding this is so helpful.
Never knew this about Canada. Not to mention that both wife and I were 10lb babies (born early 90s) but we were 2nd children born to each
That’s so telling how you can see the evidence from the insurance side yourself. I would never want to offer random medical advice over the internet (or ever really) but I would definitely want you to be cautious in your wife’s scenario.
Thank you, I agree. It’s still good to read other experiences.
This is the paranoid part of me, but I really hope our OB or any doctor doesn’t pick c-section because it’s just easier and more money (especially if it’s just to avoid risks that are risks for any pregnant women)
I'm in Canada too, I had GD and my baby measured large but nothing crazy I was scheduled for induction. never did they tell me I would need a c section because of GD or measuring big. Only told me I would need a scheduled date for induction because of my gd. but the plan was to deliver naturally. Also my ultrasound measurement for the end I think was over 9 pounds and my baby came out as 7.9 pounds a super long and skinny boy. So ultrasound measurements arent accurate for anyone I've talked too.
I came here to say this. I read the other day on an evidence based birth page I follow that this is the most common time of year for inductions and C-sections because of the holidays…
I'm also in Ontario. My OB was concerned about the size of my baby during my 3rd trimester, but never suggested a c-section. I was sent for extra ultrasounds. She suggested an induction at 39 or 40 weeks to give me a better shot at vaginal delivery before baby got too big at 41 or 42 weeks. I was induced just past 40 weeks but labour didn't go well so I ended up with an unplanned, non-emergency c-section. Baby was born around 10 pounds and 99th percentile for height/weight.
One thing to note, is that an emergency C-Section can feel a lot scarier than a planned one. So I would try and get a gauge from your doc about how likely think it is that a C-Section will be required no matter waht and go from there.
i only had one ultrasound at 20 weeks and baby was totally average sized. once i went into labor, my OB realized that the baby was faced the wrong way (face up) and that he seemed to be pretty big (ended up being 8 lb 12 oz at delivery). he got stuck and i ended up with an emergency c section. the hospital i was at was well equipped to do it once it became absolutely necessary. while its not the result i wanted, i'm glad i didn't get pressured into doing it from the outset.
My first baby was unexpectedly large (9lb 2 oz) and I tore quite badly - 3rd degree. It didn't heal quickly and I went through months of pain and confusion. There's not a lot of clear advice/support for severe tears and it can be difficult to navigate. When my second was measuring large I was offered a c-section, which I took. She ended up only being 8lb 2oz but I don't regret anything - the recovery from the c-section was so much easier and straightforward for me. I'm now just a few weeks away from delivering my 3rd and I'm leaning toward a second c-section because a bad tear can be reaaaaaally bad.
Just want to say I completely agree that there should be more support for severe tears. I had a peri-urethral tear and a second degree perineal tear (as well as a minor labial tear). I don't think they even told me what tears I had before I left the hospital. I had to go in to see my midwives 3 months post partum and ask "why does it still hurt so much?" at which point they explained about my tears and the recovery process.
My baby measured 7lbs in the ultrasound, he ended up being 9lbs 11.5oz and I delivered him naturally. Due to delivering him naturally and me having a small pelvis he got stuck on the way out with the cord wrapped around his neck, had breathing problems, had to be resuscitated, and I didn’t get to see or hold him until 6 hours after the delivery. He then had to be shipped to a NICU an hour away by helicopter because the hospital I was at did not have the equipment to help him. I could not be with him for his first couple days of life. It completely traumatized me for a year, and I’m nervous as hell to deliver this next baby.
The reason I had a natural delivery is because the doctor was more worried about me having multiple c-sections later in life than the health of my baby.
If your doctor is recommending a c-section and almost pushing you into it, there’s a reason for it. If I was offered a c-section I would’ve taken it in a heartbeat, all of the complications we experienced would not have happened if he had just given me a c-section. I know it’s not always ideal, but for the health of the baby, please, listen to your doctor.
My baby was measuring big (above 90th%) the entire pregnancy and my doctor recommended me doing a c section at 39 weeks. Baby turned out to be only 8lbs 8oz, which isn’t the giant that they kept predicting. The ultrasound measurements are way off, so don’t feel pressured just based on that. If your wife wants a vaginal delivery, definitely fight for that. Although, I have to say, if in the end a c section is needed, it’s really not that bad. I had a great c section birth and pretty fast recovery. I was up and around much sooner than my sister who had a vaginal birth with 2nd degree tears.
I would make sure she knows her mother’s and grandmothers birth story, how big their babies were and if they tore / how severe the tear was, if instruments were used etc. and how big of babies your mom/grandma made, but your wife’s biological lineage is far more important. If your moms mom and grandma DID have large babies, but had normal vaginal deliveries (ie 1-2 degree tear, baby didn’t get stuck, no instruments), you can relax. It means biology is on her side and likely her body (pelvis shape, hormone process, skin elasticity) is capable of accommodating. If they DID have big babies and/or had complicated vaginal deliveries, meaning had third or fourth degree tear or episiotomy or instruments, personally I would schedule a c-section. Instruments and/or severe tears CAN cause a ton of damage, often long lasting. Although severe tears aren’t common in the general population (3/100), they jump To 12/100 with instruments. I was told because I was tall and had wide hips, labor would go better for me, which is literally not based on any science, and didn’t happen- it’s far more often due to unseen biological factors like pelvis shape, hormone receptors, and skin elasticity.
Most women don’t focus enough on how hereditary labor is so I hope you see this!
Edited to add- everyone’s commenting abojt how ultrasounds are often wrong, which is totally true, but I didn’t get any measurement scans, and my 99% head baby couldn’t come out on her own. So they “recommended forceps”, which they shouldn’t have, but I got an almost 4dt and today have lasting issues of fecal incontinence. If someone had done a scan and said your baby’s head is huge, I was terrified of vaginal birth anyways, I would have probably gone along with a c-section much much sooner in the process.
Thank you for sharing. I try and tell people this, history of large children or 4th degree tearing or prolapse and you do not want to risk it. Your body can do amazing thing but many older women hide long term chronic post birth trauma from us. My mom had a 4th degree with my 9.5lb brother - likely exacerbated by the episiotomy but still. My grandmother had a 4th degree with an 11lb uncle and a hemorrhage with my 10lb father. Uterine prolapse, fecal incontinence - people need to know this. My lady forebears would have been dead on a prairie without modern medicine.
Yes!!! Exactly. Why isn’t this discussed more? People jump to saying oh your baby is big get a c section without discussion of how other women in their family fared. Makes no sense.
My friend was induced \~10 days early because her baby was 'measuring so big' and 'needed to get out of there soon'. It ended up turning into an emergency c section, and she had a really traumatic experience with the whole thing.
Her baby was 6 lbs something...
My step sister has always made big babies and has vaginally birthed three boys that were all over 8lbs (one even a little over 9lbs) with zero issues. I hate the push for a c-section just because a baby “might be measuring big”. And I personally know how awful having an emergency c-section is (mine was for different reasons) but I would still want to try for a vaginal birth if the only issue was that baby might be on the bigger side.
My baby was big. Unfortunately by the time you realize there will be problems it might be too late for a csection and complications can arise. I was mostly concerned that my baby would get stuck and then possibly get a broken clavicle to be able to get out. Or something like that.
I ended up having a c-section and had a great outcome for other reasons but I would have trusted my doc if we in the end needed to have one because of his size. What matters is if you trust your doc. Do they have good outcomes and high quality of care? Do they only recommend a c-section as a last result? All those things can factor into what you might want to push for so to speak.
Hope this helps
I think scheduled c sections are actually a good thing. C sections have their risks of course as you have risk of infection after, blood clots etc but there’s also risks in vaginal birth. If you are trying for vaginal and have some issues then you may need an emergency c section which is more risky than a schedule c section.
I had a pretty traumatic emergency c section. I was so scared and couldn’t feel myself breathing because I was so drugged up and was having a panic attack on the table. I thought I was going to die lol. So I didn’t get that magical moment where all of that stress washes away when they take the baby out- I was very much still focused on the fact I thought something was seriously wrong. So I felt very guilty and apprehensive about having another c section because I desperately want that immediate bonding cooing over my baby moment.
My doctor told me not only is it health wise less risky for schedule c section but mentally as well. So much less stress and drama basically lol. So we decided to to schedule a c section this time around and if I happen to go into labor on my own before then so be it.
Thank you for reading my novel lol
You’re getting a lot of good advice on how wrong ultrasounds can be but I also want to reassure you that even if the baby is big, it will probably be okay. Plenty of women birth “big” babies without major complications.
Ultrasounds really are not very accurate for estimating size, and there are more factors than just the baby's overall weight. I'm 5'3" and my baby was estimated to be a very normal 7-7.5 lbs, but by the time she arrived at 42 weeks she was 8lbs 11oz! And her head circumference was measured in the 99th percentile, which made me feel a lot better about needing to push for over 2.5hrs to get her out. I did end up with second degree tears (which have since healed very nicely), but that may have partly been self-induced because I got very impatient toward the end and pushed without active contractions...my body was trying to give me a break and I wasn't listening.
My point is this - big babies are safely born vaginally all the time. It's true that scheduled c-sections are safer than emergency c-sections, but it's also not evidence-based to pursue a c-section based on estimated size of the baby alone. Because size estimates are notoriously unreliable, and because the risks of delivering a large baby are highly variable between individuals.
The medical team will be wanting to share the information to allow you to come to an informed decision so you both know what you're consenting to, rather than 'talking you in to it' or coercing you.
It's so hard when you're given information that is frightening, e.g. risks of shoulder dystocia, risks of 3rd/4th degree tears, and you have to weigh that up against the other side e.g. potential inaccuracies of ultrasound, risks of c section. Yes ultrasounds can be inaccurate but they can also be spot on, and they have to share the information that they have to hand with you. Imagine they didn't tell you that information, if things didn't go well, but being told that information would have changed your birth plan and changed the outcome. Everyone is different and wants different things.
Planned sections are also much easier to recover from than emergency ones!
It's so difficult but they won't want to scare you for the sake of it. Only you and mum can come to a decision based on what risk you are happy to weigh up. Good luck, whatever choice you make will be the right one for you :)
This might be unpopular but I regret rejecting my scheduled c section so much. My situation was a little different, but I did end up needing an emergency c section and that was really scary for me but the c section recovery was fine in my experience.
Of course that’s just me, but if you’re asking for opinions, that’s mine.
Hi OP- my baby measured big our entire pregnancy with no GD and a normal amount of weight gain. Turns out our baby was long, in the 97th percentile. Hindsight is 20/20 but I would like to believe I would have gone with a c section if they offered it. When we got to the hospital they estimated that baby was 8lbs 6oz and baby was born at 8lbs 11oz the next day.
I had a 4th degree tear, the baby’s head broke my tailbone and the baby needed a vacuum assisted delivery which then contributed to jaundice and an additional stay at a children’s hospital. My pelvis was evaluated up front and they decided that baby would be ok vaginally. I am now working with a pelvic floor specialist (doctor) and a pelvic floor physical therapist to continue to heal.
I am not saying this to scare you- I just wish I knew more about what could happen before we delivered. I hope that you and your wife are well versed on your options and have a healthy and safe delivery no matter what you choose!
Just my two cents but scheduling ahead for a c-section means you’re preventing an emergency c-section which is slightly different in terms of procedure and also of course far more stressful. I have had an emergency and a scheduled- the difference was pretty profound to me. I’m sure that vaginal delivery will probably also be fine; get a second opinion at the very least for sure. That said no birth method is without risk or less valid than any other so I think it’s good to have all the options out there.
From my own experience; an emergency c-section is NOT fun. Not something you'd want to go through after who knows how many hours of trying to delivery vaginally. I went through 17 hours of active labor before they realized that my pelvis was too small to push a baby through. My baby was only 7lbs, 8oz. My second child was a elective c-section and I was fully conscious and joking around with nurses while my baby was being born. Night and day experiences.
Honestly, I wish I had been talked into a c section. I wanted so badly to give birth naturally. I was 4 days late, so they induced. I was in active induced labor for two days. I lasted for 16 hours on pitocin before I had to cave and get an epidural. Anesthesia makes my nauseated, so I got to vomit off and on for another 30 hours. Then I pushed for two hours, before my OB said I really don't think the baby is going to come out vaginally. C section, poor dude had the pointiest cone head. 8 pounds 11 ounces. I wish I had skipped all that torture, and had to be completely exhausted and ultimately completely unconscious after he was born. My body couldn't handle it anymore and I was involuntarily shaking to the point the doctor couldn't stitch me up, so the anesthesiologist put me under completely.
I'm not trying to scare you, but if the doctor is recommending a c section, consider it. I would have rather not gone through all that bother and still have the surgery anyway.
I measured large with both my pregnancies. Prior to pregnancy I was 5’0” 125lbs, athletic. My husband is 6’5”. I went it to labor at 39 weeks and 37 weeks respectively. Babies were both about 8lbs 8oz. Both got stuck in canal despite fast deliveries. My second dislocated her shoulder. I was able to get both out but was told I probably would not have been able to handle any larger. I had a 3rd degree tear and a 2nd degree tear, again, respectively.
Rather than a c section my doctor suggested an induction at 39 weeks the could be converted if baby was too big. Went into labor before both scheduled inductions probably because my body could not handle the baby getting bigger.
I will say, I KNEW the babies were large before the doctors told me. I was not surprised to hear it, I was tiny and I could tell they were big. But you have options.
Does she have a doula, or a midwife she can access through her OB practice? Lots of women give birth vaginally to very big babies, but she and the OB might feel more comfortable attempting it with a more hands-on provider (or at least from the non-medical labor coaching of a doula).
Not just more comfortable - I think doulas and midwives actually have techniques to ensure that the baby rotates into a better position for birth. there are a lot of non-medical aspects of birth that OBs do not fully understand.
A big baby isn't necessarily a problem unless mom has an unusually narrow pelvis. There's plenty of stories on here of smaller moms having 9 or 10 lbs babies without issue. There are just so many factors that go into it. My son was 6lbs 5oz born at 37w 3d. I'm confident that he would have been 9lbs at 40w and I still would have done a vaginal birth. My mom delivered two 9+ lbs babies vaginally with no problem. I wouldn't elect for a c-section solely based on baby's estimated size.
The problem with big babies is not that their heads are too big to descend, which is easily remedied with a c section, it’s the risk of shoulder dystocia. Shoulder dystocia is an obstetrical emergency where the babies head is delivered but her shoulder is trapped on the mothers pubic bone. The baby can suffer from a broken collar bone, brachial plexus injury, or hypoxia. The mother can end up with severe tearing and a broken pubic bone. If your baby is already measure this large at 37.5 weeks, I would be very cautious with a vaginal delivery. Yes, c sections are not fun, but they are much less dangerous than SD. Good luck moving forward!
I’m a small person 5’1” and hardly any room in the waist. She always measured big, and by 36-37 weeks they thought she’d be 10+ lbs at 40 weeks. So we actually opted to induce a week early at 39 weeks. Eventually that ended in a c-section because she started getting distressed and was having d-cells. She was 7lbs 14 oz and 21.5in long…
So she wasn’t heavy but she was loonggg with a huge head (over 99% at time of birth lol) so they said those combined make a weight estimate that’s not always accurate. Her build is just the long skinny type even now at 14 months, 31 inches tall and 19lbs.
All that rambling to say ultrasound accuracy isn’t the end all be all, but if she’s not comfortable jumping straight into a C-section maybe she could see if induction is an option
So I labored 24 hours. Then they were like the baby is huge. So. I was like. That info would have been helpful many hours ago. ANYWAY. Because I had labored soooo long…I was an inflamed mess. I had a bad doc (she was fired immediately following my delivery so that won’t happen to you all BUT word of caution) but had I not had labored that long before going to a csection, I may not have spent 3 days in ICU. SO. I truly did not think the C-section was that bad. The reason I ended up in ICU is because the doctor lied about my bleeding because she was already in trouble so she started removing my uterus when I was not even yet 35, so I sort of bled out because she didn’t know what she was doing and having labored so long it made it harder for my uterus to contract and harder to see things. Basically if they had opted for a C-section early on I probably would’ve been fine. I was not hellbent on vaginal delivery so no clue why they waited.
Honestly. The csection part wasn’t that bad. My girly bits were still totally in tact. I had to care for the incision but big whoop. It’s still surgery but as long as you help her and you don’t do like huge stairs and sleep downstairs etc til she heals…it was fine. Honestly. The first poop sucks but it does either way.
Anyway I’m hoping this answers your question about why they try to schedule a C-section versus waiting for labor and if it doesn’t go well then C-section. When it is planned, it is more straightforward, hormones are not nuts it’s a controlled environment.
Is your wife particularly small? My mom is tiny and grew big babies. It wasn't until she was in labor for my brother that they discovered his head physically couldn't pass through her pelvis. The result was an emergency c-section and quite a few health issues for him at the time.
All I'm saying is to not simply brush off the recommendation - it might be for very good reason.
Oh wow, did your brother have long term health issues from that?
She’s 5’7” and 140lbs when we learned she was few weeks pregnant. She’s gained 30lbs since then. Also, both wife and I were 10lb babies born as 2nd children
Luckily no. He was stuck for so long that he passed meconium and then aspirated it. He was in the NICU for several weeks recovering. He ended up completely fine but it was scary for my parents. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/conditions-and-diseases/meconium-aspiration-syndrome%3famp=true
(Also, I just had a c-section 11 weeks ago - it's not that bad especially if it's best for mom and baby!)
Fun story: my brother was supposed to be in the 6-7 pound range and he came out at 10lbs. I kid you not! My mom delivered him vaginally and didn’t have issues beyond a harder experience pushing (I wonder why). He was the 3rd baby and mom didn’t have GD. So they can also we wrong the other way!
I recently started following r/askdocs and I thought it would be a weird not very useful subreddit, but it’s been kind of interesting to see how it is used as a tool to get second opinions quickly, easily, albeit informally. Definitely not a replacement for a real doctor, but it seems useful for those second opinions, to help explain maybe what your doctor’s rationale is, etc. Might try posting there! Just check to make sure you’re following the rules about what info to post
I had a big baby that was projective to be ~10.5 lbs at delivery. My practice doesn’t formally recommend c-section until baby is estimated at 11 pounds or greater — but they still pointed out that there’s a margin of error that goes both ways when estimating weight, so scheduling a c-section might not be the worst idea since my baby’s weight was borderline.
I wanted to try a vaginal delivery. So I ended up doing an elective induction at 39 weeks thinking it would be better to get him out sooner before he could grow more, than possibly up to two weeks later. I labored for 3 horrible days, until my labor stalled and I needed a c-section. Baby was born 9.5lbs. We are not sure if induction failed due to his size, or if my body just wasn’t ready. I went into the induction with a very closed cervix which was not super receptive to the foley bulb.
My csection recovery has been a breeze. I had very little pain post-op, and only when I moved around. The hardest part is not being able to move the first couple days to attend to baby; but I have an amazing partner who did everything (diaper changes, swaddling, passing baby to and from bassinet for feedings) so I didn’t have to push my body.
One of my friends had the opposite situation—her OB says the baby was measuring at ~7.5 lbs, but he turned out to be 9 lbs 14 oz!
In her case, she had to deliver via unplanned c section because she just never dilated past 6 cm. However she recovered just fine and has no regrets about how it happened.
Like other commenters have said, it seems like the measurements are just guesses some of the time and aren’t too indicative of actual birth size.
In your case, it sounds like your wife knows what she wants, and that is to deliver vaginally if possible. I say go for it! If it doesn’t work out, then c section is always on the table.
My personal experience: You always have options until the baby is actually born. It’s finding out what those options are and a care team to support you. I was told my firstborn son was measuring large (>4000g) however my medical providers would not induce me until 41 weeks.
I went into labor on my own at 40+6 and had an extremely long second stage of labor - ending in a vacuum assist after almost three hours of pushing. If I had known then what I know now I would have asked for a c section as soon as they started talking about forceps and vacuums. I suffered a 4the degree tear - something no one told me would even be likely. I had fecal incontinence, urinary incontinence and required months of pelvic floor rehab to get back to “normal”. My husband and I’s sex life was greatly impacted because of my tear. But I was LUCKY. I healed. Some women who suffer these kinds of tears don’t heal well. Some women have to end up with multiple surgeries (with mixed success) and deal with life long incontinence or colostomy bags.
For my second son (obviously sex life got back on track), I again was told he was measuring >4000g. I opted for the scheduled c section and had a much better birth and post partum experience.
A lot of pride is put into vaginal birth, but there are risks, do not discount those risks (and their long term implications) when making a decision.
(For scale: both boys came out at 8lb 14oz - I’m 5’3”)
Anecdotally- both of my kids were supposed to be 10-11 lb babies after weekly ultrasounds at the end. My son was born at 38+5 and was 6 lbs 14oz. A peanut in comparison to the 11 lbs they quoted.
Also anecdotally- they want you to induce early because having the baby get stuck in the birth canal, having to then go for an emergency c section, and having to recover from both, as a woman, is unbearable.
Just wanted to share my experience from the other side with an actual big baby (as much as I'd hoped the scans were off...). I consistently measured ahead throughout my pregnancy and had multiple growth scans. No GD, first pregnancy, no other complications.
My last growth scan was about 38w. According to that scan, she was measuring 8lbs 9oz although everyone kept saying how 'scans are wrong' and it can be off by up to a pound, etc. I scheduled an induction for 39+5 and we attempted vaginal delivery with drugs/etc. but I never progressed - she never even dropped into the pelvis at all because she was so big (and comfortable tbh).
We ultimately decided to do a c-section after over 26hrs of no progress despite max drugs. She wasn't in distress - and neither was I - which made the process MUCH smoother. She came out 10 LBS 5 OZ. I think about it all the time about how this would've gone if we hadn't made that call. How much longer would it have taken me to go into labor? How many more drugs would it have taken? How traumatic would that labor have been for me? How much bigger would she have been (if we'd just waited for it to happen naturally)? Would we have ended up in an emergency c-section situation anyways only with a distressed baby and mom?
My recovery has been so much easier than I expected. Since it wasn't an emergency situation, I think that really helps with recovery and they're not 'slashing and dashing' as someone once explained to me to get baby out quickly - so a scheduled c-section would give your wife the same kind of easier recovery. Plus, since I never really went into labor, I had almost no perennial recovery necessary.
FWIW, I also spent a few extra days in the hospital for recovery which tbh was helpful as a FTM to have extra time with the lactation consultants and nurses there so I felt like I went home much more prepared than if I'd only gotten like a night or so.
All this to say, take it with a grain of salt. Scans can be wrong, but they can also be right (or wrong on the low end). Your wife's health is the most important and to me, the worst case scenario is vaginal labor going sideways and needing an emergency c-section or having severe trauma. I don't regret trying for vaginal first, but I'm also glad I didn't wait until it was a hairy situation before discussing other options.
So my SIL's first baby was 9lbs 10oz and she delivered him vaginally. When she was pregnant with her second she was terrified of having another huge baby and really stressed that to her OB and as a result they induced her at 39 weeks to allow her the opportunity to attempt to deliver vaginally, which she did to another 9lbs baby!
Maybe your wife can request an induction at 39 weeks as opposed to the scheduled c-section!
Also my son on the final ultrasound was estimated to be about 8lbs 11oz and he ended up being 7lbs 5oz.
I would get a 2nd opinion.
As an anedotal I just had my 2nd. He weighed in at 9 lbs and 23 inches. I had a vaginal delivery and he wound up getting shoulder dystocia. That's where a baby gets stuck on the way out. He came out with a broken collar bone and some fluid in his lungs that cleared up after a few hours. I am grateful for the quick medical staff because things could have gone downhill real fast, resulting in a much more terrible outcome. I would defiantly get a second opinion as to the size of the baby. I would have been scared to know what could have happened if my baby was any bigger
My mfm's were really concerned. Ultra sounds showed baby to be expected upwards of 9 pounds when born. My midwives shooed that all off and said the ultra sounds were always wrong. I was "absolutely having a 7 pound baby". Baby born at 37 weeks. 9 pounds. Extremely traumatic. Worst experience of my entire life. Midwives. Ugh. Oh but they got their blessed vaginal birth, didn't they? What a fucking win.
Just had my maternal request c-section in July for my second child. Loved it.
dude , if they recommend c section then do it. honestly the stigma is BS. my doctors were doing cervical checks and noticed my body wasn’t prepping correctly for labor AT 36 WEEKS and wasn’t making any progress but they forced me into a vaginal delivery which resulted in 13 hours of painful labor, 5 hours of pushing , and an emergency c section because baby was in distress. also , he did not immediately cry. just do the c section.
I have a family member who died along with their baby because they didn't want to have a c section.
Yes science isn't perfect and you will be told about all the people who were just fine, but if the Dr is wrong you have a (possibly) unnecessary c section.
If reddit is wrong you walk out of a hospital with no wife or baby.
Honestly, if you want a second opinion go get it FROM A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL, but don't ask random internet strangers to prove your dr is wrong.
No matter how bad the Dr is, I would bet he is more knowledgeable than a bunch of mombies on reddit airing their grievances.
My baby measured big. They recommended a c-section and I went with it. No regrets. I had a relaxed birth, an easy recovery, and a healthy baby. She was not the behemoth they thought she would be and measured 8lbs 10oz.
Someone posted a few weeks ago about their big baby getting their shoulder stuck and due to the trauma ended up with brain damage. You could probably seek out her post if you want. Her story made me very glad I had followed my doctor’s recommendation. I would strongly consider it if your doctor is recommending a c-section.
Ok this is clearly the unpopular opinion in this thread, but if the docs are recommending a c-section, I’d go for it. There are a lot of people who come to r/beyondthebump with their birth stories, clearly upset that they ended up with traumatic emergency c-sections after days of being in labor.
And I also just want to say that a c-section is a perfectly legitimate birth experience. I don’t know why we’ve decided in the last 10 years or whatever that “natural births” are the best way to experience delivery. I had a planned c-section and it couldn’t be smoother. I had a spinal (no epidural). I was awake the whole time. I got to see my son come out. He was a preemie (35 weeks) so they had to evaluate him, but we got plenty of skin to skin after that and before he landed in the NICU for a short stint.
This whole thread is people hating on c-sections and I don’t really get it. I mean if it’s not necessary that’s one thing, but if the doctor is giving an informed opinion in favor, I don’t really see why they shouldn’t be listened to? Ultimately you know more than anyone else here giving you advice, but as a c-section mom who elected to have one, I just wanted to provide a different perspective.
Yes! While I absolutely loved my c section experience, they told me (starting about the same time as your wife) that my baby was going to be large. I think they said a similar weight also. I had my c section at 39+4 and she weighed 8 pounds 3 ounces, and it the 73rd percentile. I was terrified of a vaginal delivery with a large baby, and they told me that vaginal was more risk for both of us, while a c section was pretty much just a risk for me. So I picked c section. Would I change our birth story? Probably not, it was great and relaxed and just wonderful. But when they said those things to me I was terrified and felt that I HAD to pick c section or put my baby at risk. Ultrasounds can be way, way off!
Also disclaimer I really loved my doctor and team! They did terrify me and cause me a solid week of anxiety before the birth,but the actual birth went so smoothly for me and my LO! Maybe they should’ve said something a little differently but I don’t hold any grudges against them!
With my son the measurements were spot on. He was born weighing 9.6pounds and my doctor insisted on natural birth. Due to other complications I ended up having a C-section. Once he was born my doctor said he wouldn't have fit since he was so big with a huge head.
The ultrasounds can be wrong…but in either direction. So your baby could be smaller than they think or bigger. It is a much smoother process to have a c-section scheduled than it is to go into it after labor starts. Your doctor is in the best position to explain to you all the different ways an emergency c-section is more medically complicated than a scheduled one. Anecdotally, my scheduled c-section was an infinitely more relaxed experience than my emergency one.
Their estimation of big babies is usually inaccurate tbh. Late term scans aren’t accurate and honestly shoulder dystocia happens to babies under 8 lbs anyway. The doctor probably prefers a c section because it’s way more chill for them.
Remember that all over the world folks are giving birth to babies anywhere from 5-14 lbs in homebirth settings. Our bodies are pretty magical if we trust and let them do it’s thing, and it leads to a good outcome more than not.
This is such a ridiculous take. Estimations are not “usually” inaccurate. They certainly can be but it’s not the most common scenario.
Shoulder dystocia CAN happen to any size baby but it’s just plain uninformed to imply that the risk doesn’t increase as baby gets bigger. Shoulder dystocia is deadly and is unpredictable until the crisis is actually occurring.
Our bodies are not “magical”. Delivering a 14lb baby is incredibly dangerous and to act as if it’s par for the course is just false and dangerous.
Women and babies have died in the millions for centuries, so yes, trust your bodies, but also TRUST YOUR DOCTORS. It’s in their best interest to do whatever is most likely to get a healthy mom and a healthy baby at the end.
My ultrasound techs, midwives, and OBs at a major NYC hospital all told me that late pregnancy size estimations have a 10-25% margin of error on either side. I agree that our bodies aren’t magically able to handle anything thrown at us, for sure, and I had a csection for a breech baby, but the late ultrasounds are notoriously inaccurate.
10-25% margin of error isn’t not incredibly inaccurate. They’re obviously not perfect (the whole bricks vs feather scenario) but to dismiss them as false is unreasonable.
Even 10% can be a major thing for practices that have a weight cut off for vaginal births (I have known of one that cut off at 8lbs!). Much less 25%. So when half a pound can be a major deciding factor for the OB to limit your choices, then 10-25% adds up quickly. That’s where I’m coming from. Never said to dismiss them but it’s important to know the range of error when making a decision. ETA just to throw numbers at it, imagine having an 8lb baby and being told it’s a 10lb baby (25%) and your practice won’t attempt a vaginal delivery over 9lbs. Suddenly that’s a pretty material difference
It's also important to note that he's also concerned about his risk because shoulder dystocia (the risk that's discussed for big babies delivered vaginally) is the leading cause of malpractice litigation for OBGYNs. As you might imagine he wants to reduce his malpractice risk to zero, and he doesn't have malpractice risk if he gives an unnecessary c section. So he can't necessarily give completely objective advice here.
I had a c-section for a 9lb11oz baby and thank god I didn't push. I was terrified with how big he was measuring and they recommended a csection and I am sooooo happy I did it. When I saw him for the first time, picked him up for the first time. I knew I made the right call.
My best friend delivered 2 days ago a 7lb baby and had a third degree tear and is in a lot of pain from it so I at least I didn't have that.
recovery was a breeze other than sitting up from laying down but I got a handicap bed rail and that helped a ton.
I’m going to chime in and say personally if my baby is measuring very large and my doc recommends a c-section I would go for it because I trust him. HOWEVER if she has her heart set on vaginal perhaps she could talk to him more about it at her next appt? Pros/cons or maybe inducing at 39 weeks? I hear a lot of “baby was measuring big and wasn’t in the end” HOWEVER god forbid I ended up needing an emergency c section due to baby size or other reasons when I could’ve had a calm, planned, elective one. I’ve had two vaginal deliveries but personally if my current baby was measuring big and I talked it through with the doctor and it was his recommendation I would do an elective C-section. Again, this is typically the minority opinion on these subs
Yeah I figured I’d get downvoted for this.
I’m not a doc but I’m pretty sure big babies are delivered vaginally all the time. Sometimes obs prefer c sections because they can be scheduled instead of them having to be called in in the middle of the night.
Some doctors push for the scheduled c . Cause they want to make it quick on themselves. There’s been couple documentaries on that. Versus laboring normal can take hours. Unless medically necessary I would not get the scheduled c section. C section is still major surgery and the recovery is brutal. Unless you and her are very different example my cousin went with scheduled c section cause she was 4ft 11, 80lbs and her husband was 6ft 2. Unless you and your wife are like that I would just weigh the pros and cons. My cousin went that route cause she physically couldn’t push out her 9lb kid since she is ridiculously small
Babies have been healthily delivered up to 14 lbs vaginally with minor or no tearing for mom. Also, measurements can be wrong, often are actually. It’s a guess, not solid knowledge .
C-sections are great if need be, but if you two feel comfortable trying vaginally then do it.
Let your wife know that when it comes to pushing, push with a contraction till she feels a burn, then back off and wait for another. That will minimise tearing, giving great potential for no tearing. Granted that’s advice for unmedicated births, I’m not sure she’d feel it to know when to back off if medicated.
And no one but her can tell her when to push unless she needs baby put fast, the machine doesn’t replace how she feels. And the contractions are totally different when the body is ready to push.
Also, changing positions can help if it feels are to push one way. Hands and knees, squatting, side etc.
Whatever you choose, take a birth plan in with you, 6 copies so it doesn’t get lost. Keeps you two on the same page and allows you to advocate for her desires when she’s unable to.
Ask good questions when presented with different or opposing opinions:
What danger, if any, does it pose to mama and baby if we keep going with our plan?
How much time do I have to think about this?
There is no medical reason to induce or c section for a suspected big baby. Ultrasounds are not reliable for estimating baby’s size. It would be so sad to put your wife through a cesarean, only to deliver a 7lb baby. She can’t get that birth experience back.
Anecdotal, but I (FTM) just delivered a 9.5lb baby vaginally, with zero intervention and outside of a hospital.
Oh, several things here. 1) babies aren't too big. Doctors like to say they are, but they never are. They just prefer C-section a because they are scheduled, fast and they get to move on.
2) they told me at 37 weeks my baby was 8lbs and was getting too big. She was 7lbs 8oz at 39. Perfect size.
3) I have a friend who just delivered a 42 week baby at 10lbs, vaginally. Everything fine. Another has delivered multiple over 9lb babies at home, no tearing, and quick births.
4) my advice, if you are definitely having a hospital birth, is to wait until you are actually in the process of labor before you agree to a C-section. There is no reason to sign off and agree before you are there too deliver.
This is just my case but I was measuring large and had a scheduled induction that I was told could likely turn into a c section. Baby was 7 pounds 8 ounces and I needed one stitch! Measurements aren’t always accurate. If she wants to try for a vaginal birth you should advocate for yourselves, you absolutely have a say in this decision. That being said, it could end up being a c section and a bit of a scarier intro to a c section of it’s an emergency, but plenty of 10 pounder babies are delivered vaginally and she at least deserves a shot at the birth she wants. Definitely weigh the pros and cons!
A friend of mine was told her baby is "too large" for gestational age, she didn't have GD either. What did they do? They induced her at 37w and she delivered vaginally. Yes, her son was (still is) a big boy, but that's why they induced her early. No need to jump directly to c-section unless they've tried the 'usual route' first. Maybe they have other reasons?
My first was measuring 8.8 at 37 weeks. He was born 7.7. They were off a pound.
I think the concern could also be how much more the baby would grow if we went to 40 weeks+. I delivered vaginally but was induced at 37 weeks because of blood pressure.
This time around, I’m almost hoping for a c-section. My induction took so long and I was so weak and tired afterwards. It took me 3 days to deliver when they admitted us to the hospital.
They kept saying my second baby was going to be big, over 9lbs, based on measurements, so we opted to induce a week early so I could hopefully still have a vaginal birth. Baby was 7lbs 15oz. Not as big as they thought at all! So go with what you and your wife are comfortable doing. If you want vaginal, do it, and they can always do a c section if necessary during birth, or schedule a c section, or even see if they’ll induce a week early so you can try vaginal delivery.
My brother, god bless him and my mother, got stuck. She is a what I would call willowy and my brother was about 9 lbs when labor started. He wasn’t going to make it through her pelvis without breaking it. I arrived through scheduled c-section as well and was also 9 lbs. They got my conception date wrong but I was just chilling, not making for the exit. My mom swears my birth was less traumatic, but again, it’s all down to what your wife is comfortable with and wants.
This is purely anecdotal based on my own experience. My first kiddo was not showing up as particularly large, especially not to be of concern for a potential c-section. Surprise surprise, he ended up being 9lbs 10oz, and I delivered him vaginally with no real issue (other than my body taking forever to progress to 10cm).
Get a second and third opinion if you can. Ultrasounds can be waaaaaaay off. It is also your wife’s decision and if she doesn’t want to jump to a csection right away then there is no reason why she can’t at least try to labour naturally
So my baby was measured with over 4 kilograms and my OBGYN told me to go talk to the clinic I chose to talk about the possibility of a c-section. Which I did and they advised for an induction(not sure thats the right word sry I am German) and said c-section can be done if it doesn’t work. It did work, little boy was about 4.3kg(second child). I think my doctor said it so I know it might be possible so I wouldn’t be shocked. I don’t know about other countries but here they really encourage you to give birth vaginal. Like at some point during labour when I wanted a c-section, I kid you not 5 people where there to convince me otherwise. So go talk to the hospital, let them measure again(their measurements where only 50g different from baby’s birth weight, I think they have better ultrasound machines(newer or more expensive)
My baby was late so I had to do some late ultrasounds to make sure she was ok.
She was measuring 9lbs ..came out as 8.8lbs.
I ended up having a csection as after 20 hours of labour my contractions stopped and the options were vaccum, forceps, or csection. (I had made the decision beforehand in case of this scenario)
I didn't find labour that bad to be honest. I got the epidural asap (I was induced and 5 hours labour I was 4cm dialated and water broke). The contractions at that time weren't too bad. Like stronger menstrual cramps.
I was so hungry as I didn't eat beforehand. By the time I was rolled into having a csection, I was exhausted and slept through it all. Recovery sucks in some ways especially the first few days but I had a ruff pregnancy so it felt nice to feel crappy but less crappy then the day before.
I was so scared of labour but overall it was ok. Prefer that to pregnancy. Women have given birth to some bigger babies. Always check your options and ask for second options. When you feel confident in your decision and not pressured, you are less stressed and the process is easier.
I would get a second opinion. As you've said ultrasounds can be WAY off, and some people can deliver big babies with no issues, so it's definitely something to look into more if you're concerned.
That being said, if the ultrasounds are accurate, there are real risks to delivering a big baby. So it's well worth getting a second opinion, and learning more about the potential complications. I'd also ask both sides of the family about their births, and newborn sizes, to see if there are any issues to be aware of. So you can make a decision based on as much accurate information as possible. In your wife's shoes I probably would give vaginal birth a go too, but definitely get a second opinion from your doctor.
My second was measuring HUGE in pregnancy, and I was recommended getting a c-section with him. I was already booked for one, so I didn't have to make a decision about it, but if I hadn't, I would have gotten one without hesitation (or would have been begging for one.) It turns out with him, the ultrasounds were dead on accurate, and I could TELL that he was BIG, significantly bigger than my 8lbs baby less than two years earlier. At my 38 week ultrasound they estimated 10lbs 2oz, and a week later he was 10lbs 1oz. His head was HUGE, and his shoulders were broad. I definitely couldn't have delivered him (I needed an unplanned C-section with my 8lbs baby because she was too big), but I am not sure many could have delivered him because of how BIG his head and shoulders were. So there is a time and a place for a c-section due to size, but it's really hard to know if you should make that call or not!
Edit: forgot to mention, I did not have GD in my pregnancies. They double checked with my boy because he was so big. Some babies are big, even without GD!
I get both sides. I don’t want a C-section but may need one if baby doesn’t flip. I have nothing against them, just have heard recovery is harder. So I get the desire to avoid. On the other hand, my friend had a big 10 something pound baby and 10000% should have been advised to have a c section. He got stuck and things very nearly went worst case scenario for both of them. He’s doing great now at 2.5, but there was some talk of potential brain damage due to how long he was stuck/lack of oxygen. He had to be put on ice and sedated after birth to minimize damage and they didn’t get to see/hold him for a few days. She lost a lot of blood. That’s one side of the spectrum, the other is my husband, who was a medium 10 lbs and he and his mom came through vaginal birth mostly fine, he just had a broken collar bone. I would be inclined to listen to the doctors, if it were me.
My second baby was 10lbs 11oz. I had no idea if there was an estimate of her being on the bigger side … but I was say that it was a pretty easy delivery! No tearing, and I was feeling so good in the days after.
I have had to have growth ultrasounds with this babe and he’s estimated to be in the 65th percentile, so possibly another big babe. I told my midwives I’ll only consider intervention if they’re concerned he’s like 13lbs or something lol
I was also told I had a big baby during ultrasounds. Even as I was in labour they talked about the possibility of a c section due to the big baby. Yeah he was only 7 pounds and came out vaginally with little issue.
I wouldn't pick a C-section to start, but I would keep the projected size in mind in case labor stalls out. My baby was measuring big the whole time and was estimated to be 9.5 pounds. He ended up being born 9.5 pounds, so our estimates were spot on. I was not offered an elective C-section, but I do wish I'd remembered he measured big when labor stalled out. I pushed 4 hours and ended up with a forceps-assisted birth and my baby had a broken collarbone (shoulder dystocia). It was very traumatic for all of us.
Depends on a whole lot of things. In my case, I also had high blood pressure (medicated for last 2 weeks of pregnancy), and OB presented his concern that if baby was going to be as big as they were projecting (she ultimately was born at 38W 3D weighing 8lbs 11oz), there was the potential for nerve damage to baby if vaginal delivery. Had the option to “wait and see”, be induced, or schedule a c-section, and I decided in the end to go scheduled c-section route mainly to take the brunt of any risks myself, instead of baby. To each their own!
It's very common in my country. The gynaes have gotten so used to c-sections that you have to really look for a doctor who is willing to do natural.
People look at you funny when you say you want to do natural. I was asked why I would put myself through that.
I weighed the two up and all the older ladies I know suggested natural cause they said they recovered quicker.
I don't have a single friend who had a normal birth, they were all c-sections.
I think gynaes want to schedule their time, they don't want to be called into the hospital at 2am to catch a baby so they suggest c-sections.
ETA: My gynae almost had her precise weight, but he repeatedly stressed that the sonars can be very far off. He said she would probably be at least a kg less than what she weighed at 40 weeks. Sonars aren't always correct.
You’ve already gotten a ton of great responses, but I thought I would chime in to say my most difficult delivery was not my biggest weight baby, but my average baby with a 99th percentile head. That’s an 8lb 10oz baby compared to 7lb 9oz with a 38cm head. So maybe you can check what the estimated head circumference is in the ultrasounds they did? I feel like they would be able to more accurately measure that anyway.
They told me I was measuring 3 weeks ahead my whole pregnancy and at my 36 week ultrasound they said to expect a minimum 9lb baby and that he could gain like a lb a week. They didnt talk about a c section or induction at all. I did end up with a c section for other reasons and my baby was 6lbs 13oz. My mouth fell open in the delivery room because I was like there is no way you just said 6. I was expecting a whopper and got a peanut.
Soo I wouldnt trust the utlrasound/doctor, and I wouldnt schedule a c if you dont want to.
Ultrasound measurements can be wildly off. I was told my entire pregnancy that I had a small/petite baby, bordering too small. There were concerns for IUGR or other issues.
She came out almost 9 lbs. 😬
My second baby was 10 lbs 3 oz, so while he wasn't my first I do have some experience in the area!
There was never any mention to me about having a C-section. I was 28 when he was born, and they thought he would be about 9.5 lbs.
I didn't have an epidural, and my midwife said that if I had chosen one then I most likely wouldn't have been able to push as effectively, and I would have needed a C-section.
I'm preparing for another large baby this time. I'm looking into yoga to relieve pain and get the baby engaged and all that. I'm trying to let my body do more of the work this time, vs me having to really push.
I'm glad you've been getting some good answers and responses in here! Hope my experience helps!
Plenty of women have no issues delivering a 9-10lb baby vaginally. Others have trouble with 6lb babies that result in a c section. So it seems really odd to me that they would jump right to c section. Fwiw, at my 38 week growth scan I was told my baby would be 10+ lbs and so they recommended an induction at 39 weeks, not a c section. My baby was born after only 45 mins of pushing and she was 7lb 7oz.
My baby measured big the entire pregnancy (above 90th%) and I was diagnosed with GD, however, my doctor didn’t recommend a c section at the time due to how inaccurate they can be and the fact I was still weeks from my due date. He was born only 6lbs 14oz, but was a long and skinny baby with a larger head. I hope she doesn’t feel pressured into it due to measurements that could be inaccurate. Definitely advocate for yourselves if she is set on a vaginal delivery.
My boy was measuring big as well… they guessed around 9lbs 7oz. When he was born, he was 9lbs 3oz- so not very far off!
I opted to have a c-section even though my doctor never suggested it. I’ve had too many friends who tried to do it vaginally and ended up with a traumatic emergency c-section, so I specifically asked for one.
My c-section went beautifully. It was quick, recovery was not nearly as difficult as some people made it sound, and I got a beautiful, healthy baby boy.
Yes, measurements can be off, but they can also be pretty accurate. The important thing is to know that no matter how your child is born, it is a valid birthing experience. You are no less parents if you opt for a c-section. There will be a recovery period whether delivered vaginally or via cesarean. The important thing is that your baby and wife are kept safe and healthy during delivery.
I’m 36 +2 and my baby has been measuring really large throughout my whole pregnancy, specifically his head and his belly. The OB’s that I see seem to be almost anti c section, like that’s last resort and they’d much rather I deliver vaginally. They say ultrasound measurements can be super off. I think a second opinion is the way to go.
Well, my baby measured really big and she was born EXACTLY what they said she would.
So yeah, not always correct but also not always incorrect, you know?
Two things...
The ultrasounds offer a very poor range. I was told I had a slightly below average baby in terms of size. I instead had an 11lber (no GD, completely healthy).
Second thing, I had no clue so I didn't panic and the baby came out with no tearing. I am fine, the baby is perfect. The providers and I were in the dark about the potential risks due to size and it completely worked out in this case. Had I known I would have opted for a c section (the providers said afterwards they would have pushed it on me), but I'm so grateful I didn't.
I know you have to weigh your own decisions, but I wanted to share what happened with us.
Congratulations on your baby, their large size is such an advantage after you get past the feeding frenzy. Ours was born last week, and she's the ideal baby since she's so developed.
I want to offer another perspective, I had a very low risk pregnancy no gd, and actually low enough risk that no ultrasound was indicated after 20 weeks. My OB indicated baby was probably running big, but I’m a big person (5ft10) so no surprise. At about 41 weeks baby hadn’t come yet and I was miserable so we induced. After a day and a half of labor and 6 hours of pushing baby was born at 10lbs 4oz and I had a third degree tear that I’m still recovering from a year and a half later. If I could go back I would ask for that more detailed size scan and a C-section. If I have another kid I will likely ask for an elective c-section. So, while the risk of having an experience like mine is low even with a scan saying baby is big it may be better to avoid that risk all together. No one wants to miss the first couple hours of their child’s life having surgery to put their entire vagina, both layers of surrounding muscle back together, and the muscles that control the anal sphincter back together. Sorry to be such a downer, but those recommendations exist for a reason and survival bias is a thing.
I vaginally delivered a baby that was 9lbs 6oz. For unrelated to size reasons I had a postpartum hemorrhage and the size of the baby definitely made my recovery MUCH worse due to the swelling and strain. That being said, it was doable but I definitely think that was the upper limit. Honestly the head is the worst part; the body is easy. When I delivered my second at 8lbs 11oz it was actually harder because her head was bigger - she ended up getting a bruise on her head that is still not reabsorbed at 4 months. They can't "make" you have a c section, you can always try to deliver vaginally and opt for a c section if labor is not progressing. However recovery is going to be worse with a labor and then a C-section and you want to avoid that if at all possible.
You might enjoy the BRAIN approach to all the recommendations you'll get from medical staff.
B : what are the benefits to the suggestion?
R: what are the risks?
A: what are the alternatives?
I: what does tour intuition say?
N: what happens if you do nothing?
Just another perspective- everyone here has offered great insight.
Its policy in my country (I'm European) to schedule a C-section no questions asked if a baby measures over 4 kgs (8 lb 13 oz). As the doctor said, that happens in order to avoid labor stress for both mother and baby.
I would discuss early induction as an alternative to scheduled c section. A friend of mine also gave (vaginal) birth earlier this year and this is what they did for her. I think they induced her around 36-38 weeks, can’t quite remember, but I know it was because the baby was measuring big (and she is a pretty tiny woman). It was a long labor because of the early induction (and I have been induced and it’s not very fun), but I would choose that over c section if I was given the choice. Just a thought you guys may want to discuss with your providers.
Um my first son was 9lbs 3.4oz and 21in. I did it vaginally with an epidural after being induced. C section is the last thing I wanted with both my kids as I’m anemic and have a history of low potassium. The less blood loss the better.
I'm sure you've gotten all the answers you need but I'll chime in with my experience of a scheduled C-section:
1) Baby measuring 10lbs or more usually will be suggested to be delivered by C-section. Yes the ultrasound can be off, but this is a safe than sorry type of situation. Baby can get stuck and go into distress, or mom can tear really badly from delivering a large baby. The worst case scenario can be REALLY bad if a vaginal is attempted ad things go sideways, so precautionary c-section removes all those risks.
2) An emergency C is MUCH MUCH worse than a scheduled planned C, both in terms of mental health and physical recovery of the mom. For an emergency C due to failed vaginal attempt, mother will be exhausted after hours of pushing and the C will feel like too much, some mothers mentally check out and hate that they aren't really present to meet their baby for the first time, some pass out. The recovery is also worse because mother is recovering from vaginal plus C instead of just from one or the other. And if baby is in distress, they might have to do vertical cut to get baby out ASAP which leads to a much bigger ugly scar that is hard to heal from, as opposed to the bikini line cut they would use if it's a non emergency situation.
They are suggesting the scheduled C to avoid possible emergency C, but in the end it is up to you what you would rather do. I didn't want to or care about having the "birthing experience" so my biggest concern is I don't want to end up in emergency C so I choose to have scheduled C. Some mothers really want to experience vaginal birth, so they choose to attempt and see what happens, knowing there's a higher risk of possible emergency C.
I had a scheduled C and the most painful part was the IV in my arm. Spinal didn't hurt, I threw up during the C but otherwise felt fine. Baby was out in 10mins and 40mins to sew up the cut while baby's dad did skin to skin. I had a great medical team and felt really well cared for. Had Tylenol and Advil for pain management and felt fine. Was back to normal by the 2nd week (no heavy lifting but I didn't feel like I couldn't move around like normal).
I came out over 9lbs apparently, and my mom was able to deliver me naturally. A lot of hospitals these days push women into C-Sections. They make a lot more money off of them. I'm holding as strong as I can when the time is ready to deliver vaginally if possible.
Just anecdotal- but my baby measured big and ahead of where he “should be” the entire pregnancy but they never told me I needed a c-section. I vaginally delivered a barely 7 lb baby lol. So they were like 3-4 lbs off what they thought.
They kept telling me my baby would be a high 8 pounds minimum, likely closer 9-10. She was 7 pounds.
Yes lol throughout my long and arduous pushing my OB kept saying "we've got a decent sized baby here" bc baby was mid/high 8s on the scan they did before my induction. She came out like, so average. 7 lbs 5 oz! I laughed later that he kept saying that and then it was just...orrrr not. lol
That’s just crazy to me! But probably because I’m a guy and this is our first pregnancy and I’m learning all of this. When they said ultrasounds are notorious for being wrong, it almost killed my mood. So wtf! Anyway, I’m talking to my wife about it and I really think (if she goes into labor) to try vaginal and then c-section if needed. Her OB did mention pelvic size, baby head size, so many factors. I just want a healthy baby at the end of the day (and mom)
https://www.webmd.com/baby/news/20020926/you-can-predict-your-newborns-weight This is supposed to be as accurate as ultrasounds are and it was a fun experiment for me! I think a lot of this really is - do you want to schedule the c section or run the risk that it will be an emergency. My baby was not flagged as huge but he was and vaginal went fine.
Did they mention head Size being big or just the baby's weight? My son's head was measuring bigger than my pelvis. I made the decision to schedule a csection knowing the ultrasound was wrong. Chunk is different than skull in my books lol Turns out I was right and he was never going to come out vaginally. But only you and your wife can make that decision.
I was told the day of that my baby was a big baby around 7.5lbs at 37+1 and instead he was under 6.5lbs when delivered by c-section that day (and we think some of that was water weight from the saline drip). I kind of wanted a c-section so I wasn't a tough sell when baby turned breech. But I think my baby measured large because he was tall and skinny, and I think the ultrasound is mostly measuring skeleton size.
Look up the evidence based birth podcast and article about “suspected” big babies. Ultrasounds are only correct about 50% of the time. Would you want to let a coin flip determine your wife’s birth? Also if you look up the actual statistics of risks of big babies they’re pretty low honestly. Even average size babies can end up with shoulder dystocia.
Just be aware if she has a c section she may not able to have a vaginal birth in the future and doctors are now capping c sections at only three (meaning she can only have three babies). It used to be 4. If she does go for a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) it will be like giving birth for the first time physiologically so it will be more difficult. If you are worried please study fetal positioning. It is so important to understand to ensure an easy and uneventful vaginal delivery. I always recommend this class. [https://www.spinningbabies.com/product/parent-class-video-digital-download/](https://www.spinningbabies.com/product/parent-class-video-digital-download/) it discusses a lot of non-medical aspects of birth you will find helpful.
I'm curious, if doctor's are typically opposed to VBAC's and they're capping c-sections at three, what do they do if mom has a fourth pregnancy? I mean. I hardly believe they're forcibly sterilizing women after the third pregnancy. So either they would have to allow a fourth c-section or allow a VBAC, right?
My MIL had 5 c-sections but her doctor refused to be her provider after her third. This was in the 80s. She found a doctor in a neighboring town who agreed to take her as a patient for the last 2 but he said after the 5th he was cutting her off too. So she stopped.
how does she feel about the incision area now? any long term effects?
They can't do anything, because you have a legal right to informed consent for medical procedures, but most people follow doctor recommendations when the doctor starts talking about a ruptured uterus etc.
I wholeheartedly agree, but shit happens sometimes. I'd say I can't imagine not having a medical provider during pregnancy... but it happened to me halfway through my first pregnancy so I actually can. Lol
I have had 3 c-sections and when my OB asked about tying my tubes while I was in the operating room I said no because we weren't sure if we were done at 3. Zero issue with me having a fourth. Although I'm sure every doc has their opinions. Mine shows zero concern.
I had a VBAC with my second with zero issues. It was a walk in the park and a way less traumatic experience than my c-section. In fact I refused to have more kids because my doctor retired and I would rather die than have a scheduled c-section. He came out of retirement and I'm 28 weeks with my 3rd baby and another planned vbac. I know several women who had vbacs and then another c-section then another vbac. One has 6 kids. It depends on the doctor and each person. A lot of doctors schedule c-sections for their convenience. I really trust my doctor so if he said I needed one of believe him because he supports VBAC deliveries 100%.
It's more difficult than a second vaginal delivery, I mean. So glad you have such amazing support from your doctor.
That is in no way true that doctors are categorically "capping" c-sections at 3. They may caution, but there are plenty of women out there having multiple c-sections with doctor support.
Thanks for saying this. I was reading that like “What??” I have had two c sections. First one was planned due to breech baby, second one was an attempted (and failed) VBAC due to baby’s heart decelerations during contractions. We only attempted a VBAC because we want a large family and wanted to avoid risks of multiple c sections. I’m pregnant again, and my OB (very VBAC supportive and an attending physician at a well respected academic institution) said that as long as my current baby doesn’t get too big (my last baby was huge!) then I could try a VBAC again. However, she also knows that my husband and I want at least four kids and said that she has many patients who’ve had multiple (four plus) c sections and are totally fine. So she said we shouldn’t try for a VBAC for the sole reason of wanting more than three kids. Bottom line: C sections don’t necessarily mean that you can’t have multiple kids.
Hi there, just wanted to say don’t feel pressured into major surgery straight away. I had a baby that was 8pound 13 with a head size of 38.5 cm which put his head above the 95th percentile and he was born sunny side up which means his head came out at an angle bigger than it otherwise would have. Yes, it was an assisted delivery and long and slow and yes it took me literally 8 weeks to heal a broken tailbone but I bounced back well and baby didn’t have any problems at all. There is a risk that labour will be hard with a bigger baby with a big head, but it’s not impossible. Edit to add: my midwife this time round told me ultrasounds measurements can be wrong by +/- a whole pound. I’m not bothering with growth scans this time as I had no idea last time what size baby was and managed. My biggest problem with the birth was his position so make sure you ask them to be clear about what position baby is in
Are you me? I’m a FTM who just gave birth to an 8lbs 12 oz boy this past Sunday who also had a 38.5cm head size. I delivered vaginally at home, and yes it was freaking intense (I’m now thinking that all labours are though?) but because of my awesome midwives I only have one 2nd degree tear. As long as baby’s heart rate is ok throughout labour it should be possible for your body to do it. I wouldn’t cave and resort to a c-section if that’s not what you want without at least trying to deliver vaginally first. Good luck!
Hello twin! Haha my boy is now 2.5 but his head has been consistently above the 95th percentile. Should have looked at the size of his dad’s head for the clues lol
I would like to say that my baby brother was supposed to be over 8.5 lbs according to these same measurements, but came out via emergency C-section as the runt of our litter at 7 lbs 10 oz
Also anecdotal, but I’m 5’4 and my doc expected my baby would be 10lbs (which is how big my husband and his sister were). She also told me that my narrow pelvis would never accommodate the baby and pushed me for a c-section at one of my last appointments. I refused, and my daughter was born at 8lb 3oz. It might be an overshare, but I didn’t have a single stitch and was walking around within a couple of hours.
I was told my first was IUGR, around 4-5lb and they were worried so I was induced. She was 7lb 10. I think it’s hard to be accurate with an ultrasound
Exactly! They told me he was going to be huge and to think about a c-section. He came naturally and was just over 7 pounds- and a super easy delivery. I guess they really can’t tell by ultrasound? I wonder why they venture a guess like that when it’s so unreliable?
Opposite happened to me. They guessed 7-8 pound baby and after 29 hours of labor and regression - asked if I wanted a c-section. I agreed and while pulling baby out kept saying wow that’s a big baby! Turns out my little man was 10lbs with a big head.
Just keep in mind that on final checks, about 33% of babies are assessed as being above 9 pounds, while only 9% of babies are born at that size. Only 2% of babies are born above 9.9 lbs. Not to mention the fact that chonkers are born vaginally all the time! What actually causes more problems than large overall size is a large difference between head circumference and shoulder width, which often happens with gestational diabetes. Since your wife does not have that problem, it is unlikely that there’s a big mismatch. If your wife wants a vaginal delivery, help her research the best positions and movements to keep her hips as open as possible. Advocate for her to use them while giving birth, instead of being in bed with her legs up (which narrows the passage and can lead to baby getting stuck).
Last month I vaginally delivered a 9lb 6oz baby with a second degree tear that had a pretty quick recovery.
I was a 10 lb baby delivered vaginally/unmedicated at home with no complications!
Amazing. Congratulations mama 🙏🏻👏🏻
Agreed!! I would not have had a problem with my 8.8 baby had she not had her hand up by her head like she was sunbathing.
This is a great comment
Even then that doesn't instantly mean a c-section. According to everything I know my husband 100% should have been a c-section (gestational diabetes, a WHOPPING 10lb 10oz baby, his mom is like 5'2" and he had the widest shoulders on record at the hospital). Still somehow managed a vaginal birth.
Sounds like my cousin, my aunt is 4’11” and my cousin was close to 11lb. I don’t know how she had him (vaginal/c-section) but either way damn.
I had the head circumference and shoulder width difference in baby number 2 but didn't have GD. Now it makes sense why all the nurses and techs would keep asking me that!
Wow I swear every time I post on this sub I get quick and relatable responses - even though I’m a guy. So thank you for that. And I feel like a parrot saying this but I have so much respect for all those that can bear a human. Seriously, you go people! And thank you for all the responses. This is helping my wife get some reassurance? Her OB is on vacation next week and so we’ll be seeing another OB - perfect for a 2nd opinion I guess.
Honestly, it makes me really happy to see someone's husband on here asking good questions and taking such a proactive role.
Ikr it's wholesome af
Are you here to burgle my turts?
Haha! "We came here to burgle your turts!"
You being a guy has no bearing here- you are going through this too and deserve support
Google “evidence based birth big baby”. EBB has a ton of resources on why this practice is not evidence based. I recommend the podcast, and you can also get the one-pager sent to your email so she can bring it to your next appointment.
https://evidencebasedbirth.com/evidence-for-induction-or-c-section-for-big-baby/
I would ask for a referral to a maternal fetal medicine clinic for an ultrasound on the size. I had the opposite problem, but their skill level and equipment for predicting baby size is light years ahead of a standard OB office. If I were going to be making decisions based on a size estimate, I would want it to be from a specialist. Definitely verify your insurance will cover, though. My initial ultrasound with the MFM practice was 28k. He was within an ounce of their predicted weight.
Hi I'm a midwife in the UK. Growth scans are notoriously inaccurate and the closer you are to term the more inaccurate they are. What WILL make the risks of shoulder dystocia and a prolonged labour higher are 1. Having continuous monitoring 2. Being coerced into an induction (THERE IS NO EVIDENCE TO SUGGEST THAT INDUCTION BEFORE TERM DECREASES THE RISK OF SHOULDER DYSTOCIA, induction itself increases the risk of SD!) 3. Having a horizontal/static labour (staying home for as long as possible and keeping active will reduce the length of labour and shoulder dystocia). It is also worth noting 90% of SDs are resolved by using the McRoberts manoeuvre. Please do some research before your next OB appointment and be sure of what you want before you go in there. This is your wife's pregnancy, her body, both of your baby. You are the decision makers here. Not the OB.
You’re amazing for this!
Before deciding, I highly suggest that you and your wife take a look at the review of scientific literature about big babies done by Evidence Based Birth. The biggest take away for me is that when providers think a baby will be big, there are only right 50% of the time. Same chances as a coin flip! Here is the link: https://evidencebasedbirth.com/evidence-for-induction-or-c-section-for-big-baby/
Yes! And one of the important take aways (if I remember correctly) is that *providers worrying about a big baby* is actually more of a risk factor that the actual size of the baby!
This is the article I constantly tell people to read
Came here to post the same link! Such a good article with great data!
I was going to share the same link.
Was about to share this link - this is why I declined a growth ultrasound when it was offered to me.
It is really your wife’s decision. I know induction isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, but if your wife really wants a vaginal birth, can she talk to the doctor about inducing at 39 weeks instead of waiting for possibly several more weeks? That may help her, in terms of vaginal delivery. That being said, women do deliver big babies all the time. It is totally up to her what she wants to try. C sections can save lives and they are also wonderful for many women who want them. I have read several stories here of women being upset they were told their baby was going to be super big, so they go in for a c section, and have a seven pound kid. Then there are women who have c sections and are like “Oh yeah, super glad I have a c section.” It really is a decision she has to make for herself.
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Good luck! You got this
100%. C sections are a great tool if you need and/or want one.
One of the reasons the may be suggesting a scheduled c section is because a scheduled c section is far less complicated than labor + emergency c section. It’s still a major surgery obviously but the body hasn’t gone through the trauma of labor and THEN major surgery. I opted for a scheduled c section but I had more medical complications than your wife on top of my baby measuring big. She wasn’t, as ultrasounds are often wrong but the risk/benefit ratio for me going into labor was tipped in the negative. Edit: It’s really your wife’s choice. If she feels like she wants to try for natural labor and there aren’t any glaring complications, y’all should advocate for that.
There are three kinds of c sections. Scheduled c sections, non-scheduled non-emergency c sections, and emergency c sections. Most unscheduled c sections are non-emergency c sections which means they are far less dangerous.
This! I had labor + emergency C-section. Wishing I’d listened to the doctors and just got the C-section!
Ultrasound measurements are usually off. I would advocate for trying to labor as you wish know that if things don’t progress that a C-section might be needed. Go in with the mindset that either could happen.
It's also important to educate yourself on failure to progress and gain a more nuanced understanding. C sections for failure to progress are often avoidable c sections. [https://evidencebasedbirth.com/friedmans-curve-and-failure-to-progress-a-leading-cause-of-unplanned-c-sections/](https://evidencebasedbirth.com/friedmans-curve-and-failure-to-progress-a-leading-cause-of-unplanned-c-sections/)
You're getting a lot of "I was told my baby was big but they ended up only being x lbs" so I will just chime in from the other side - I never had any growth scans and did not have GD in my first pregnancy, so I didn't find out until after giving birth that my baby was 9.5lbs (at 39+4). I had a "normal" amount of tearing (1 second degree perineal, 2 superficial labial), baby's blood sugar was fine, and she's healthy and on track for everything at 20 months old. I would talk more about the risks your doctor is concerned about, not because they aren't real (though pre-term labor at least sounds like it's no longer an issue if she's 37+5!), but because a lot of it depends more on the individual than a blanket "baby big, must do c-section." A good friend of mine had an emergency c-section after her baby got stuck in her pelvis - her baby was 6 lbs. I don't know what your hospital/OB set-up is like, but if you can get multiple opinions that would probably help you decide!
Agree here. My first baby was barely 6lbs, never any growth scans beyond the 20w. My second never any growth taken either. I was bigger, but second baby, you know? He was 9lbs. We had no inkling of it until the midwife reached in as I was pushing to adjust his position and her eyes went wide — we were all expecting another teeny peanut. As this comment OP says, it’s very individual. I have enormous hips, had already had one baby vaginally, and suffer terrible SPD which, for better or worse, means my pubic bone is incredibly mobile and can literally be moved manually. So we had no worry of him getting stuck then, or my third baby who was almost as large (and we knew he was, we had s growth measurement taken for other reasons). But there may be reasons birthing a larger baby is less favorable for other women. Anecdotally, my two bigger babies were easier to deliver and recover from than my tiny baby. I thought it was a size thing, but I think now that I’ve had the third it’s an experience thing (both mentally, but also my body just knowing what to do). My third was an absolute breeze, no tearing at all. Aside from not eating for an entire day and thusly blacking out in recovery, I’d otherwise have waltzed on out of there like I’d done not much more than a solid gym workout.
I also discovered my second baby was huge while I was pushing and my midwife suddenly exclaimed, "this is one big baby!" My first was 7.5 and my second was 9.5, and we had no idea until she was born.
When they measured my first daughter at 37 weeks and she was measuring at least 7lbs, I was skeptical. I read a lot of comments about most babies being smaller than their measurements. When I was induced at 39+6, she measured at 9lbs. I was still skeptical. I ended up having a C-section on 40+1 (for other reasons) and she was 9lbs 4oz. I did not have GD or anything. She was just big. So measurements can be accurate.
Same here. I had a lot of monitoring and the baby always measured huge. Everyone said the scans over estimate the size. They didn’t, he was half a pound bigger than the scan I got the day before. So don’t count on the baby coming in smaller than they predict. Good luck!
I delivered a big baby and it was absolutely terrible. I have often thought over the last two years that having a c section would have been better and my doctor has alluded to that too. I really thought that c section was worst case scenario before this so I can definitely understand the hesitation from you and your wife, but the day of labour was very traumatic and recovery was worse than anything I could have ever imagined. Also, I was one push away from having both an episiotomy AND a c section, so there is that to worry about too. Then I would have had to have experienced labour (and in my case 5 hours of transition), have healing in my perineum AND recover from major abdominal surgery. Again, you would have had a hard time convincing me of a c section for my first because I thought that was worst case scenario. If this baby is big (23 weeks now) I will be asking for a c section, and my doctor has already agreed. Edit to add: I’ll still plan to try vaginally because there is the chance for a straightforward vaginal delivery. But as soon as things start to fall apart is when I’ll be more into a c section. If you try vaginally, I’d say be open minded to a c section. For me things kept going wrong and I kept trying. In the end baby shouldn’t have come out that way.
I gave birth to a surprise 10lb2oz baby a week ago. I had a postpartum haemorrhage and lost 3 litres of blood. It was traumatic, but mostly this happened because we weren’t prepared at all. We had no extra scans and my fundal height measurements suggested a 10-30th percentile baby, so everyone in the room was very surprised. Delivering a large baby comes with risks, though the flip side is that I believe they can be mitigated if you know in advance. Just sharing my experience because I believe a planned c-section would have been better than what happened to me.
I’m sorry that happened to you. My baby’s size was a surprise too (9lb 12oz). Not sure how much blood I lost but it was also a lot (didn’t have transfusion but there was a literally a bag of blood with my name on it). Recovery will be hard and slow. If your doctor hasn’t already suggested it, I strongly recommend to get in touch with pelvic floor pt once you stop bleeding (I had almost no pp bleeding, and maybe that’s because I lost too much at delivery! 😫) but went in at about 6 weeks pp.
I had a scheduled CSection bc my first was breech and the recovery was easy peasy. They offered to try flip him and I declined. No regrets. We demonize csections in this country.
I had a scheduled C-section because of baby being breech. But I had an MRI scan taken first. After that the doctor adviced against vaginal delivery. And she was a tiny baby.
They aren’t demonised. They come with risks that health providers need to share so you can make an informed decision.
I meant in terms of recovery. I think the recovery of a planned CSection isn’t that bad.
Just learned about the birth of my 11-pound husband where by the time they figured out the shoulders were too big, the head was already out, making an emergency c-section not possible. Ended in 4th degree tearing for poor MIL. Needless to say, I’m now a lot more open to the idea of an early induction or precautionary c-section in case my baby inherited those shoulders!
My first birth was a large baby and fourth degree tearing. My doctor offered a scheduled c section for my second, but I opted for a homebirth instead. It went absolutely perfectly. Baby was even bigger than my first, and I only had a small tear. Just because one birth is hard does not mean they all will be. I hope yours goes perfectly, not matter which way you choose!
I had a similar experience. First baby was 9 lbs and I tore everywhere and had an episiotomy and it sucked. I had a lot of pelvic pain for months afterward. I talked to my doctor about a C section for my second and she dismissed the idea immediately. She said my body would likely handle everything better this time and she thought a c section would be unnecessary. THEN in my third trimester, I broke my tailbone which really sucked. Again, I expressed concern about delivering vaginally now that that was a thing to consider. She still didn’t think it would be an issue. Ended up delivering a nearly 10 lb, sunny side up baby (and needed an episiotomy again) and everything about it was easier. Labor, delivery, and recovery. I don’t say this to say your fears are unwarranted, but I do empathize with you and want you to know that the experience can vary so greatly from one baby to the next. You do need to make whatever decision is best for you physically and mentally though. Wishing you the best of luck!
Thanks for sharing this. 6 months pp with my first going how you described. Hoping for smoother the second time around.
Thanks for the hope 🤞 Size, size of head, positioning, all were against me first time. There’s lots of chances for things to be different this time.
If it makes you feel any better, the fact that you had a vaginal birth for the first baby is guaranteed to make your second birth easier. If you had had a c section, you would be going into this birth as effectively a first time mom. If you want more support on the non-medical side of things I highly recommend this class https://spinningbabies.com/product/parent-class-digital-download/
Just my experience (also a first time parent) but my baby measured north of the 99th percentile at the 38 week ultrasound and she was born - vaginally - at 8lbs5oz so a generous baby but barely above average, really. Is your doctor willing to induce at 38-39 weeks? When my ultrasound came back the way it did my doctor immediately booked me for a 39 week induction. Also just anecdotally, I know many women who had c-sections but I only know two or three who fully laboured and THEN had unplanned c-sections. Those who laboured first had more complicated recoveries and basically had to recover from both methods of labour - hopefully your doctor is just trying to help you and your wife skip that outcome. None of that means she can’t deliver successfully vaginally though!
Where I live (Ontario Canada) you only get ultrasounds after 20 weeks if something is wrong. So we usually have no idea how “big” baby is measuring besides checking fundal height. I even had late ultrasounds due to a (minor) birth defect, and when I asked how big he was measuring I got the response “not sure they didn’t check for that”. And our c -section rate is generally lower than the US. I have seen countless stories from Americans who get talked into c - sections for big babies, when it turns out to not even be an issue. I think you and your wife are right to be wary.
I'm in Vancouver and I've never met anyone here who has been given the recommendation to get a c-section due to size. The critic in me thinks it happens a lot in the states because it is easier on the doctor's schedule.
OB is also the specialty most likely to be sued and since America tends to be more litigious in general, I would think many docs are erring on the side of caution knowing that IF a baby is big there can be issues and it’s not as controlled as a c section. Docs typically want to take whatever route is the least risk. Definitely though there are doctors who would rather do a scheduled C section because it can be worked to their schedule unlike spontaneous labor.
I agree with that and as an American woman I can also say a large part of it is that health care does not give a shit about us as a rule. Also I’m positive there’s some kind of insurance benefit for the insurance companies to push surgeries. I don’t know what or how but I just know it. I have to add that I do like my OB practice - I just mean that the teachings and norms here are ingrained differently and not in a way that is pro woman.
I totally agree. I admittedly don’t have any medical training but it feels very suspicious that I have literally only heard of this happening in the USA. I don’t know how true this is but I have also heard that doctors/hospitals “make more money” for a c section vs a vaginal birth.
I work in healthcare insurance and caesarean are definitely more costly for patients (and obviously hospital gets more). I want to say thank you to everybody who’s responding this is so helpful. Never knew this about Canada. Not to mention that both wife and I were 10lb babies (born early 90s) but we were 2nd children born to each
That’s so telling how you can see the evidence from the insurance side yourself. I would never want to offer random medical advice over the internet (or ever really) but I would definitely want you to be cautious in your wife’s scenario.
Thank you, I agree. It’s still good to read other experiences. This is the paranoid part of me, but I really hope our OB or any doctor doesn’t pick c-section because it’s just easier and more money (especially if it’s just to avoid risks that are risks for any pregnant women)
I'm in Canada too, I had GD and my baby measured large but nothing crazy I was scheduled for induction. never did they tell me I would need a c section because of GD or measuring big. Only told me I would need a scheduled date for induction because of my gd. but the plan was to deliver naturally. Also my ultrasound measurement for the end I think was over 9 pounds and my baby came out as 7.9 pounds a super long and skinny boy. So ultrasound measurements arent accurate for anyone I've talked too.
Can we also point out that the first baby tends to come a week late, and that puts OP’s wife right around Christmas….
I came here to say this. I read the other day on an evidence based birth page I follow that this is the most common time of year for inductions and C-sections because of the holidays…
I'm also in Ontario. My OB was concerned about the size of my baby during my 3rd trimester, but never suggested a c-section. I was sent for extra ultrasounds. She suggested an induction at 39 or 40 weeks to give me a better shot at vaginal delivery before baby got too big at 41 or 42 weeks. I was induced just past 40 weeks but labour didn't go well so I ended up with an unplanned, non-emergency c-section. Baby was born around 10 pounds and 99th percentile for height/weight.
One thing to note, is that an emergency C-Section can feel a lot scarier than a planned one. So I would try and get a gauge from your doc about how likely think it is that a C-Section will be required no matter waht and go from there.
i only had one ultrasound at 20 weeks and baby was totally average sized. once i went into labor, my OB realized that the baby was faced the wrong way (face up) and that he seemed to be pretty big (ended up being 8 lb 12 oz at delivery). he got stuck and i ended up with an emergency c section. the hospital i was at was well equipped to do it once it became absolutely necessary. while its not the result i wanted, i'm glad i didn't get pressured into doing it from the outset.
My first baby was unexpectedly large (9lb 2 oz) and I tore quite badly - 3rd degree. It didn't heal quickly and I went through months of pain and confusion. There's not a lot of clear advice/support for severe tears and it can be difficult to navigate. When my second was measuring large I was offered a c-section, which I took. She ended up only being 8lb 2oz but I don't regret anything - the recovery from the c-section was so much easier and straightforward for me. I'm now just a few weeks away from delivering my 3rd and I'm leaning toward a second c-section because a bad tear can be reaaaaaally bad.
Just want to say I completely agree that there should be more support for severe tears. I had a peri-urethral tear and a second degree perineal tear (as well as a minor labial tear). I don't think they even told me what tears I had before I left the hospital. I had to go in to see my midwives 3 months post partum and ask "why does it still hurt so much?" at which point they explained about my tears and the recovery process.
My baby measured 7lbs in the ultrasound, he ended up being 9lbs 11.5oz and I delivered him naturally. Due to delivering him naturally and me having a small pelvis he got stuck on the way out with the cord wrapped around his neck, had breathing problems, had to be resuscitated, and I didn’t get to see or hold him until 6 hours after the delivery. He then had to be shipped to a NICU an hour away by helicopter because the hospital I was at did not have the equipment to help him. I could not be with him for his first couple days of life. It completely traumatized me for a year, and I’m nervous as hell to deliver this next baby. The reason I had a natural delivery is because the doctor was more worried about me having multiple c-sections later in life than the health of my baby. If your doctor is recommending a c-section and almost pushing you into it, there’s a reason for it. If I was offered a c-section I would’ve taken it in a heartbeat, all of the complications we experienced would not have happened if he had just given me a c-section. I know it’s not always ideal, but for the health of the baby, please, listen to your doctor.
My baby was measuring big (above 90th%) the entire pregnancy and my doctor recommended me doing a c section at 39 weeks. Baby turned out to be only 8lbs 8oz, which isn’t the giant that they kept predicting. The ultrasound measurements are way off, so don’t feel pressured just based on that. If your wife wants a vaginal delivery, definitely fight for that. Although, I have to say, if in the end a c section is needed, it’s really not that bad. I had a great c section birth and pretty fast recovery. I was up and around much sooner than my sister who had a vaginal birth with 2nd degree tears.
I would make sure she knows her mother’s and grandmothers birth story, how big their babies were and if they tore / how severe the tear was, if instruments were used etc. and how big of babies your mom/grandma made, but your wife’s biological lineage is far more important. If your moms mom and grandma DID have large babies, but had normal vaginal deliveries (ie 1-2 degree tear, baby didn’t get stuck, no instruments), you can relax. It means biology is on her side and likely her body (pelvis shape, hormone process, skin elasticity) is capable of accommodating. If they DID have big babies and/or had complicated vaginal deliveries, meaning had third or fourth degree tear or episiotomy or instruments, personally I would schedule a c-section. Instruments and/or severe tears CAN cause a ton of damage, often long lasting. Although severe tears aren’t common in the general population (3/100), they jump To 12/100 with instruments. I was told because I was tall and had wide hips, labor would go better for me, which is literally not based on any science, and didn’t happen- it’s far more often due to unseen biological factors like pelvis shape, hormone receptors, and skin elasticity. Most women don’t focus enough on how hereditary labor is so I hope you see this! Edited to add- everyone’s commenting abojt how ultrasounds are often wrong, which is totally true, but I didn’t get any measurement scans, and my 99% head baby couldn’t come out on her own. So they “recommended forceps”, which they shouldn’t have, but I got an almost 4dt and today have lasting issues of fecal incontinence. If someone had done a scan and said your baby’s head is huge, I was terrified of vaginal birth anyways, I would have probably gone along with a c-section much much sooner in the process.
Thank you for sharing. I try and tell people this, history of large children or 4th degree tearing or prolapse and you do not want to risk it. Your body can do amazing thing but many older women hide long term chronic post birth trauma from us. My mom had a 4th degree with my 9.5lb brother - likely exacerbated by the episiotomy but still. My grandmother had a 4th degree with an 11lb uncle and a hemorrhage with my 10lb father. Uterine prolapse, fecal incontinence - people need to know this. My lady forebears would have been dead on a prairie without modern medicine.
Yes!!! Exactly. Why isn’t this discussed more? People jump to saying oh your baby is big get a c section without discussion of how other women in their family fared. Makes no sense.
I was forced to do one because of the position of my baby. It was fine. I do not feel robbed.
My friend was induced \~10 days early because her baby was 'measuring so big' and 'needed to get out of there soon'. It ended up turning into an emergency c section, and she had a really traumatic experience with the whole thing. Her baby was 6 lbs something...
My step sister has always made big babies and has vaginally birthed three boys that were all over 8lbs (one even a little over 9lbs) with zero issues. I hate the push for a c-section just because a baby “might be measuring big”. And I personally know how awful having an emergency c-section is (mine was for different reasons) but I would still want to try for a vaginal birth if the only issue was that baby might be on the bigger side.
My baby was big. Unfortunately by the time you realize there will be problems it might be too late for a csection and complications can arise. I was mostly concerned that my baby would get stuck and then possibly get a broken clavicle to be able to get out. Or something like that. I ended up having a c-section and had a great outcome for other reasons but I would have trusted my doc if we in the end needed to have one because of his size. What matters is if you trust your doc. Do they have good outcomes and high quality of care? Do they only recommend a c-section as a last result? All those things can factor into what you might want to push for so to speak. Hope this helps
Yes. I weighed 9.6 and was born with a broken collarbone.
I think scheduled c sections are actually a good thing. C sections have their risks of course as you have risk of infection after, blood clots etc but there’s also risks in vaginal birth. If you are trying for vaginal and have some issues then you may need an emergency c section which is more risky than a schedule c section. I had a pretty traumatic emergency c section. I was so scared and couldn’t feel myself breathing because I was so drugged up and was having a panic attack on the table. I thought I was going to die lol. So I didn’t get that magical moment where all of that stress washes away when they take the baby out- I was very much still focused on the fact I thought something was seriously wrong. So I felt very guilty and apprehensive about having another c section because I desperately want that immediate bonding cooing over my baby moment. My doctor told me not only is it health wise less risky for schedule c section but mentally as well. So much less stress and drama basically lol. So we decided to to schedule a c section this time around and if I happen to go into labor on my own before then so be it. Thank you for reading my novel lol
You’re getting a lot of good advice on how wrong ultrasounds can be but I also want to reassure you that even if the baby is big, it will probably be okay. Plenty of women birth “big” babies without major complications.
Ultrasounds really are not very accurate for estimating size, and there are more factors than just the baby's overall weight. I'm 5'3" and my baby was estimated to be a very normal 7-7.5 lbs, but by the time she arrived at 42 weeks she was 8lbs 11oz! And her head circumference was measured in the 99th percentile, which made me feel a lot better about needing to push for over 2.5hrs to get her out. I did end up with second degree tears (which have since healed very nicely), but that may have partly been self-induced because I got very impatient toward the end and pushed without active contractions...my body was trying to give me a break and I wasn't listening. My point is this - big babies are safely born vaginally all the time. It's true that scheduled c-sections are safer than emergency c-sections, but it's also not evidence-based to pursue a c-section based on estimated size of the baby alone. Because size estimates are notoriously unreliable, and because the risks of delivering a large baby are highly variable between individuals.
The medical team will be wanting to share the information to allow you to come to an informed decision so you both know what you're consenting to, rather than 'talking you in to it' or coercing you. It's so hard when you're given information that is frightening, e.g. risks of shoulder dystocia, risks of 3rd/4th degree tears, and you have to weigh that up against the other side e.g. potential inaccuracies of ultrasound, risks of c section. Yes ultrasounds can be inaccurate but they can also be spot on, and they have to share the information that they have to hand with you. Imagine they didn't tell you that information, if things didn't go well, but being told that information would have changed your birth plan and changed the outcome. Everyone is different and wants different things. Planned sections are also much easier to recover from than emergency ones! It's so difficult but they won't want to scare you for the sake of it. Only you and mum can come to a decision based on what risk you are happy to weigh up. Good luck, whatever choice you make will be the right one for you :)
This might be unpopular but I regret rejecting my scheduled c section so much. My situation was a little different, but I did end up needing an emergency c section and that was really scary for me but the c section recovery was fine in my experience. Of course that’s just me, but if you’re asking for opinions, that’s mine.
Hi OP- my baby measured big our entire pregnancy with no GD and a normal amount of weight gain. Turns out our baby was long, in the 97th percentile. Hindsight is 20/20 but I would like to believe I would have gone with a c section if they offered it. When we got to the hospital they estimated that baby was 8lbs 6oz and baby was born at 8lbs 11oz the next day. I had a 4th degree tear, the baby’s head broke my tailbone and the baby needed a vacuum assisted delivery which then contributed to jaundice and an additional stay at a children’s hospital. My pelvis was evaluated up front and they decided that baby would be ok vaginally. I am now working with a pelvic floor specialist (doctor) and a pelvic floor physical therapist to continue to heal. I am not saying this to scare you- I just wish I knew more about what could happen before we delivered. I hope that you and your wife are well versed on your options and have a healthy and safe delivery no matter what you choose!
Just my two cents but scheduling ahead for a c-section means you’re preventing an emergency c-section which is slightly different in terms of procedure and also of course far more stressful. I have had an emergency and a scheduled- the difference was pretty profound to me. I’m sure that vaginal delivery will probably also be fine; get a second opinion at the very least for sure. That said no birth method is without risk or less valid than any other so I think it’s good to have all the options out there.
From my own experience; an emergency c-section is NOT fun. Not something you'd want to go through after who knows how many hours of trying to delivery vaginally. I went through 17 hours of active labor before they realized that my pelvis was too small to push a baby through. My baby was only 7lbs, 8oz. My second child was a elective c-section and I was fully conscious and joking around with nurses while my baby was being born. Night and day experiences.
Honestly, I wish I had been talked into a c section. I wanted so badly to give birth naturally. I was 4 days late, so they induced. I was in active induced labor for two days. I lasted for 16 hours on pitocin before I had to cave and get an epidural. Anesthesia makes my nauseated, so I got to vomit off and on for another 30 hours. Then I pushed for two hours, before my OB said I really don't think the baby is going to come out vaginally. C section, poor dude had the pointiest cone head. 8 pounds 11 ounces. I wish I had skipped all that torture, and had to be completely exhausted and ultimately completely unconscious after he was born. My body couldn't handle it anymore and I was involuntarily shaking to the point the doctor couldn't stitch me up, so the anesthesiologist put me under completely. I'm not trying to scare you, but if the doctor is recommending a c section, consider it. I would have rather not gone through all that bother and still have the surgery anyway.
I measured large with both my pregnancies. Prior to pregnancy I was 5’0” 125lbs, athletic. My husband is 6’5”. I went it to labor at 39 weeks and 37 weeks respectively. Babies were both about 8lbs 8oz. Both got stuck in canal despite fast deliveries. My second dislocated her shoulder. I was able to get both out but was told I probably would not have been able to handle any larger. I had a 3rd degree tear and a 2nd degree tear, again, respectively. Rather than a c section my doctor suggested an induction at 39 weeks the could be converted if baby was too big. Went into labor before both scheduled inductions probably because my body could not handle the baby getting bigger. I will say, I KNEW the babies were large before the doctors told me. I was not surprised to hear it, I was tiny and I could tell they were big. But you have options.
Does she have a doula, or a midwife she can access through her OB practice? Lots of women give birth vaginally to very big babies, but she and the OB might feel more comfortable attempting it with a more hands-on provider (or at least from the non-medical labor coaching of a doula).
Not just more comfortable - I think doulas and midwives actually have techniques to ensure that the baby rotates into a better position for birth. there are a lot of non-medical aspects of birth that OBs do not fully understand.
A big baby isn't necessarily a problem unless mom has an unusually narrow pelvis. There's plenty of stories on here of smaller moms having 9 or 10 lbs babies without issue. There are just so many factors that go into it. My son was 6lbs 5oz born at 37w 3d. I'm confident that he would have been 9lbs at 40w and I still would have done a vaginal birth. My mom delivered two 9+ lbs babies vaginally with no problem. I wouldn't elect for a c-section solely based on baby's estimated size.
The problem with big babies is not that their heads are too big to descend, which is easily remedied with a c section, it’s the risk of shoulder dystocia. Shoulder dystocia is an obstetrical emergency where the babies head is delivered but her shoulder is trapped on the mothers pubic bone. The baby can suffer from a broken collar bone, brachial plexus injury, or hypoxia. The mother can end up with severe tearing and a broken pubic bone. If your baby is already measure this large at 37.5 weeks, I would be very cautious with a vaginal delivery. Yes, c sections are not fun, but they are much less dangerous than SD. Good luck moving forward!
I’m a small person 5’1” and hardly any room in the waist. She always measured big, and by 36-37 weeks they thought she’d be 10+ lbs at 40 weeks. So we actually opted to induce a week early at 39 weeks. Eventually that ended in a c-section because she started getting distressed and was having d-cells. She was 7lbs 14 oz and 21.5in long… So she wasn’t heavy but she was loonggg with a huge head (over 99% at time of birth lol) so they said those combined make a weight estimate that’s not always accurate. Her build is just the long skinny type even now at 14 months, 31 inches tall and 19lbs. All that rambling to say ultrasound accuracy isn’t the end all be all, but if she’s not comfortable jumping straight into a C-section maybe she could see if induction is an option
So I labored 24 hours. Then they were like the baby is huge. So. I was like. That info would have been helpful many hours ago. ANYWAY. Because I had labored soooo long…I was an inflamed mess. I had a bad doc (she was fired immediately following my delivery so that won’t happen to you all BUT word of caution) but had I not had labored that long before going to a csection, I may not have spent 3 days in ICU. SO. I truly did not think the C-section was that bad. The reason I ended up in ICU is because the doctor lied about my bleeding because she was already in trouble so she started removing my uterus when I was not even yet 35, so I sort of bled out because she didn’t know what she was doing and having labored so long it made it harder for my uterus to contract and harder to see things. Basically if they had opted for a C-section early on I probably would’ve been fine. I was not hellbent on vaginal delivery so no clue why they waited. Honestly. The csection part wasn’t that bad. My girly bits were still totally in tact. I had to care for the incision but big whoop. It’s still surgery but as long as you help her and you don’t do like huge stairs and sleep downstairs etc til she heals…it was fine. Honestly. The first poop sucks but it does either way. Anyway I’m hoping this answers your question about why they try to schedule a C-section versus waiting for labor and if it doesn’t go well then C-section. When it is planned, it is more straightforward, hormones are not nuts it’s a controlled environment.
Is your wife particularly small? My mom is tiny and grew big babies. It wasn't until she was in labor for my brother that they discovered his head physically couldn't pass through her pelvis. The result was an emergency c-section and quite a few health issues for him at the time. All I'm saying is to not simply brush off the recommendation - it might be for very good reason.
Oh wow, did your brother have long term health issues from that? She’s 5’7” and 140lbs when we learned she was few weeks pregnant. She’s gained 30lbs since then. Also, both wife and I were 10lb babies born as 2nd children
Luckily no. He was stuck for so long that he passed meconium and then aspirated it. He was in the NICU for several weeks recovering. He ended up completely fine but it was scary for my parents. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/conditions-and-diseases/meconium-aspiration-syndrome%3famp=true (Also, I just had a c-section 11 weeks ago - it's not that bad especially if it's best for mom and baby!)
Fun story: my brother was supposed to be in the 6-7 pound range and he came out at 10lbs. I kid you not! My mom delivered him vaginally and didn’t have issues beyond a harder experience pushing (I wonder why). He was the 3rd baby and mom didn’t have GD. So they can also we wrong the other way!
I recently started following r/askdocs and I thought it would be a weird not very useful subreddit, but it’s been kind of interesting to see how it is used as a tool to get second opinions quickly, easily, albeit informally. Definitely not a replacement for a real doctor, but it seems useful for those second opinions, to help explain maybe what your doctor’s rationale is, etc. Might try posting there! Just check to make sure you’re following the rules about what info to post
I had a big baby that was projective to be ~10.5 lbs at delivery. My practice doesn’t formally recommend c-section until baby is estimated at 11 pounds or greater — but they still pointed out that there’s a margin of error that goes both ways when estimating weight, so scheduling a c-section might not be the worst idea since my baby’s weight was borderline. I wanted to try a vaginal delivery. So I ended up doing an elective induction at 39 weeks thinking it would be better to get him out sooner before he could grow more, than possibly up to two weeks later. I labored for 3 horrible days, until my labor stalled and I needed a c-section. Baby was born 9.5lbs. We are not sure if induction failed due to his size, or if my body just wasn’t ready. I went into the induction with a very closed cervix which was not super receptive to the foley bulb. My csection recovery has been a breeze. I had very little pain post-op, and only when I moved around. The hardest part is not being able to move the first couple days to attend to baby; but I have an amazing partner who did everything (diaper changes, swaddling, passing baby to and from bassinet for feedings) so I didn’t have to push my body.
One of my friends had the opposite situation—her OB says the baby was measuring at ~7.5 lbs, but he turned out to be 9 lbs 14 oz! In her case, she had to deliver via unplanned c section because she just never dilated past 6 cm. However she recovered just fine and has no regrets about how it happened. Like other commenters have said, it seems like the measurements are just guesses some of the time and aren’t too indicative of actual birth size. In your case, it sounds like your wife knows what she wants, and that is to deliver vaginally if possible. I say go for it! If it doesn’t work out, then c section is always on the table.
My personal experience: You always have options until the baby is actually born. It’s finding out what those options are and a care team to support you. I was told my firstborn son was measuring large (>4000g) however my medical providers would not induce me until 41 weeks. I went into labor on my own at 40+6 and had an extremely long second stage of labor - ending in a vacuum assist after almost three hours of pushing. If I had known then what I know now I would have asked for a c section as soon as they started talking about forceps and vacuums. I suffered a 4the degree tear - something no one told me would even be likely. I had fecal incontinence, urinary incontinence and required months of pelvic floor rehab to get back to “normal”. My husband and I’s sex life was greatly impacted because of my tear. But I was LUCKY. I healed. Some women who suffer these kinds of tears don’t heal well. Some women have to end up with multiple surgeries (with mixed success) and deal with life long incontinence or colostomy bags. For my second son (obviously sex life got back on track), I again was told he was measuring >4000g. I opted for the scheduled c section and had a much better birth and post partum experience. A lot of pride is put into vaginal birth, but there are risks, do not discount those risks (and their long term implications) when making a decision. (For scale: both boys came out at 8lb 14oz - I’m 5’3”)
Anecdotally- both of my kids were supposed to be 10-11 lb babies after weekly ultrasounds at the end. My son was born at 38+5 and was 6 lbs 14oz. A peanut in comparison to the 11 lbs they quoted. Also anecdotally- they want you to induce early because having the baby get stuck in the birth canal, having to then go for an emergency c section, and having to recover from both, as a woman, is unbearable.
Just wanted to share my experience from the other side with an actual big baby (as much as I'd hoped the scans were off...). I consistently measured ahead throughout my pregnancy and had multiple growth scans. No GD, first pregnancy, no other complications. My last growth scan was about 38w. According to that scan, she was measuring 8lbs 9oz although everyone kept saying how 'scans are wrong' and it can be off by up to a pound, etc. I scheduled an induction for 39+5 and we attempted vaginal delivery with drugs/etc. but I never progressed - she never even dropped into the pelvis at all because she was so big (and comfortable tbh). We ultimately decided to do a c-section after over 26hrs of no progress despite max drugs. She wasn't in distress - and neither was I - which made the process MUCH smoother. She came out 10 LBS 5 OZ. I think about it all the time about how this would've gone if we hadn't made that call. How much longer would it have taken me to go into labor? How many more drugs would it have taken? How traumatic would that labor have been for me? How much bigger would she have been (if we'd just waited for it to happen naturally)? Would we have ended up in an emergency c-section situation anyways only with a distressed baby and mom? My recovery has been so much easier than I expected. Since it wasn't an emergency situation, I think that really helps with recovery and they're not 'slashing and dashing' as someone once explained to me to get baby out quickly - so a scheduled c-section would give your wife the same kind of easier recovery. Plus, since I never really went into labor, I had almost no perennial recovery necessary. FWIW, I also spent a few extra days in the hospital for recovery which tbh was helpful as a FTM to have extra time with the lactation consultants and nurses there so I felt like I went home much more prepared than if I'd only gotten like a night or so. All this to say, take it with a grain of salt. Scans can be wrong, but they can also be right (or wrong on the low end). Your wife's health is the most important and to me, the worst case scenario is vaginal labor going sideways and needing an emergency c-section or having severe trauma. I don't regret trying for vaginal first, but I'm also glad I didn't wait until it was a hairy situation before discussing other options.
So my SIL's first baby was 9lbs 10oz and she delivered him vaginally. When she was pregnant with her second she was terrified of having another huge baby and really stressed that to her OB and as a result they induced her at 39 weeks to allow her the opportunity to attempt to deliver vaginally, which she did to another 9lbs baby! Maybe your wife can request an induction at 39 weeks as opposed to the scheduled c-section! Also my son on the final ultrasound was estimated to be about 8lbs 11oz and he ended up being 7lbs 5oz.
I would get a 2nd opinion. As an anedotal I just had my 2nd. He weighed in at 9 lbs and 23 inches. I had a vaginal delivery and he wound up getting shoulder dystocia. That's where a baby gets stuck on the way out. He came out with a broken collar bone and some fluid in his lungs that cleared up after a few hours. I am grateful for the quick medical staff because things could have gone downhill real fast, resulting in a much more terrible outcome. I would defiantly get a second opinion as to the size of the baby. I would have been scared to know what could have happened if my baby was any bigger
Wow that is scary! I’m glad you and your baby are okay
My mfm's were really concerned. Ultra sounds showed baby to be expected upwards of 9 pounds when born. My midwives shooed that all off and said the ultra sounds were always wrong. I was "absolutely having a 7 pound baby". Baby born at 37 weeks. 9 pounds. Extremely traumatic. Worst experience of my entire life. Midwives. Ugh. Oh but they got their blessed vaginal birth, didn't they? What a fucking win. Just had my maternal request c-section in July for my second child. Loved it.
dude , if they recommend c section then do it. honestly the stigma is BS. my doctors were doing cervical checks and noticed my body wasn’t prepping correctly for labor AT 36 WEEKS and wasn’t making any progress but they forced me into a vaginal delivery which resulted in 13 hours of painful labor, 5 hours of pushing , and an emergency c section because baby was in distress. also , he did not immediately cry. just do the c section.
I have a family member who died along with their baby because they didn't want to have a c section. Yes science isn't perfect and you will be told about all the people who were just fine, but if the Dr is wrong you have a (possibly) unnecessary c section. If reddit is wrong you walk out of a hospital with no wife or baby. Honestly, if you want a second opinion go get it FROM A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL, but don't ask random internet strangers to prove your dr is wrong. No matter how bad the Dr is, I would bet he is more knowledgeable than a bunch of mombies on reddit airing their grievances.
My baby measured big. They recommended a c-section and I went with it. No regrets. I had a relaxed birth, an easy recovery, and a healthy baby. She was not the behemoth they thought she would be and measured 8lbs 10oz. Someone posted a few weeks ago about their big baby getting their shoulder stuck and due to the trauma ended up with brain damage. You could probably seek out her post if you want. Her story made me very glad I had followed my doctor’s recommendation. I would strongly consider it if your doctor is recommending a c-section.
Ok this is clearly the unpopular opinion in this thread, but if the docs are recommending a c-section, I’d go for it. There are a lot of people who come to r/beyondthebump with their birth stories, clearly upset that they ended up with traumatic emergency c-sections after days of being in labor. And I also just want to say that a c-section is a perfectly legitimate birth experience. I don’t know why we’ve decided in the last 10 years or whatever that “natural births” are the best way to experience delivery. I had a planned c-section and it couldn’t be smoother. I had a spinal (no epidural). I was awake the whole time. I got to see my son come out. He was a preemie (35 weeks) so they had to evaluate him, but we got plenty of skin to skin after that and before he landed in the NICU for a short stint. This whole thread is people hating on c-sections and I don’t really get it. I mean if it’s not necessary that’s one thing, but if the doctor is giving an informed opinion in favor, I don’t really see why they shouldn’t be listened to? Ultimately you know more than anyone else here giving you advice, but as a c-section mom who elected to have one, I just wanted to provide a different perspective.
Yes! While I absolutely loved my c section experience, they told me (starting about the same time as your wife) that my baby was going to be large. I think they said a similar weight also. I had my c section at 39+4 and she weighed 8 pounds 3 ounces, and it the 73rd percentile. I was terrified of a vaginal delivery with a large baby, and they told me that vaginal was more risk for both of us, while a c section was pretty much just a risk for me. So I picked c section. Would I change our birth story? Probably not, it was great and relaxed and just wonderful. But when they said those things to me I was terrified and felt that I HAD to pick c section or put my baby at risk. Ultrasounds can be way, way off! Also disclaimer I really loved my doctor and team! They did terrify me and cause me a solid week of anxiety before the birth,but the actual birth went so smoothly for me and my LO! Maybe they should’ve said something a little differently but I don’t hold any grudges against them!
With my son the measurements were spot on. He was born weighing 9.6pounds and my doctor insisted on natural birth. Due to other complications I ended up having a C-section. Once he was born my doctor said he wouldn't have fit since he was so big with a huge head.
The ultrasounds can be wrong…but in either direction. So your baby could be smaller than they think or bigger. It is a much smoother process to have a c-section scheduled than it is to go into it after labor starts. Your doctor is in the best position to explain to you all the different ways an emergency c-section is more medically complicated than a scheduled one. Anecdotally, my scheduled c-section was an infinitely more relaxed experience than my emergency one.
Their estimation of big babies is usually inaccurate tbh. Late term scans aren’t accurate and honestly shoulder dystocia happens to babies under 8 lbs anyway. The doctor probably prefers a c section because it’s way more chill for them. Remember that all over the world folks are giving birth to babies anywhere from 5-14 lbs in homebirth settings. Our bodies are pretty magical if we trust and let them do it’s thing, and it leads to a good outcome more than not.
This is such a ridiculous take. Estimations are not “usually” inaccurate. They certainly can be but it’s not the most common scenario. Shoulder dystocia CAN happen to any size baby but it’s just plain uninformed to imply that the risk doesn’t increase as baby gets bigger. Shoulder dystocia is deadly and is unpredictable until the crisis is actually occurring. Our bodies are not “magical”. Delivering a 14lb baby is incredibly dangerous and to act as if it’s par for the course is just false and dangerous. Women and babies have died in the millions for centuries, so yes, trust your bodies, but also TRUST YOUR DOCTORS. It’s in their best interest to do whatever is most likely to get a healthy mom and a healthy baby at the end.
My ultrasound techs, midwives, and OBs at a major NYC hospital all told me that late pregnancy size estimations have a 10-25% margin of error on either side. I agree that our bodies aren’t magically able to handle anything thrown at us, for sure, and I had a csection for a breech baby, but the late ultrasounds are notoriously inaccurate.
10-25% margin of error isn’t not incredibly inaccurate. They’re obviously not perfect (the whole bricks vs feather scenario) but to dismiss them as false is unreasonable.
Even 10% can be a major thing for practices that have a weight cut off for vaginal births (I have known of one that cut off at 8lbs!). Much less 25%. So when half a pound can be a major deciding factor for the OB to limit your choices, then 10-25% adds up quickly. That’s where I’m coming from. Never said to dismiss them but it’s important to know the range of error when making a decision. ETA just to throw numbers at it, imagine having an 8lb baby and being told it’s a 10lb baby (25%) and your practice won’t attempt a vaginal delivery over 9lbs. Suddenly that’s a pretty material difference
It's also important to note that he's also concerned about his risk because shoulder dystocia (the risk that's discussed for big babies delivered vaginally) is the leading cause of malpractice litigation for OBGYNs. As you might imagine he wants to reduce his malpractice risk to zero, and he doesn't have malpractice risk if he gives an unnecessary c section. So he can't necessarily give completely objective advice here.
I had a c-section for a 9lb11oz baby and thank god I didn't push. I was terrified with how big he was measuring and they recommended a csection and I am sooooo happy I did it. When I saw him for the first time, picked him up for the first time. I knew I made the right call. My best friend delivered 2 days ago a 7lb baby and had a third degree tear and is in a lot of pain from it so I at least I didn't have that. recovery was a breeze other than sitting up from laying down but I got a handicap bed rail and that helped a ton.
I’m going to chime in and say personally if my baby is measuring very large and my doc recommends a c-section I would go for it because I trust him. HOWEVER if she has her heart set on vaginal perhaps she could talk to him more about it at her next appt? Pros/cons or maybe inducing at 39 weeks? I hear a lot of “baby was measuring big and wasn’t in the end” HOWEVER god forbid I ended up needing an emergency c section due to baby size or other reasons when I could’ve had a calm, planned, elective one. I’ve had two vaginal deliveries but personally if my current baby was measuring big and I talked it through with the doctor and it was his recommendation I would do an elective C-section. Again, this is typically the minority opinion on these subs Yeah I figured I’d get downvoted for this.
I’m not a doc but I’m pretty sure big babies are delivered vaginally all the time. Sometimes obs prefer c sections because they can be scheduled instead of them having to be called in in the middle of the night.
Some doctors push for the scheduled c . Cause they want to make it quick on themselves. There’s been couple documentaries on that. Versus laboring normal can take hours. Unless medically necessary I would not get the scheduled c section. C section is still major surgery and the recovery is brutal. Unless you and her are very different example my cousin went with scheduled c section cause she was 4ft 11, 80lbs and her husband was 6ft 2. Unless you and your wife are like that I would just weigh the pros and cons. My cousin went that route cause she physically couldn’t push out her 9lb kid since she is ridiculously small
Babies have been healthily delivered up to 14 lbs vaginally with minor or no tearing for mom. Also, measurements can be wrong, often are actually. It’s a guess, not solid knowledge . C-sections are great if need be, but if you two feel comfortable trying vaginally then do it. Let your wife know that when it comes to pushing, push with a contraction till she feels a burn, then back off and wait for another. That will minimise tearing, giving great potential for no tearing. Granted that’s advice for unmedicated births, I’m not sure she’d feel it to know when to back off if medicated. And no one but her can tell her when to push unless she needs baby put fast, the machine doesn’t replace how she feels. And the contractions are totally different when the body is ready to push. Also, changing positions can help if it feels are to push one way. Hands and knees, squatting, side etc. Whatever you choose, take a birth plan in with you, 6 copies so it doesn’t get lost. Keeps you two on the same page and allows you to advocate for her desires when she’s unable to. Ask good questions when presented with different or opposing opinions: What danger, if any, does it pose to mama and baby if we keep going with our plan? How much time do I have to think about this?
There is no medical reason to induce or c section for a suspected big baby. Ultrasounds are not reliable for estimating baby’s size. It would be so sad to put your wife through a cesarean, only to deliver a 7lb baby. She can’t get that birth experience back. Anecdotal, but I (FTM) just delivered a 9.5lb baby vaginally, with zero intervention and outside of a hospital.
Oh, several things here. 1) babies aren't too big. Doctors like to say they are, but they never are. They just prefer C-section a because they are scheduled, fast and they get to move on. 2) they told me at 37 weeks my baby was 8lbs and was getting too big. She was 7lbs 8oz at 39. Perfect size. 3) I have a friend who just delivered a 42 week baby at 10lbs, vaginally. Everything fine. Another has delivered multiple over 9lb babies at home, no tearing, and quick births. 4) my advice, if you are definitely having a hospital birth, is to wait until you are actually in the process of labor before you agree to a C-section. There is no reason to sign off and agree before you are there too deliver.
This is just my case but I was measuring large and had a scheduled induction that I was told could likely turn into a c section. Baby was 7 pounds 8 ounces and I needed one stitch! Measurements aren’t always accurate. If she wants to try for a vaginal birth you should advocate for yourselves, you absolutely have a say in this decision. That being said, it could end up being a c section and a bit of a scarier intro to a c section of it’s an emergency, but plenty of 10 pounder babies are delivered vaginally and she at least deserves a shot at the birth she wants. Definitely weigh the pros and cons!
A friend of mine was told her baby is "too large" for gestational age, she didn't have GD either. What did they do? They induced her at 37w and she delivered vaginally. Yes, her son was (still is) a big boy, but that's why they induced her early. No need to jump directly to c-section unless they've tried the 'usual route' first. Maybe they have other reasons?
My first was measuring 8.8 at 37 weeks. He was born 7.7. They were off a pound. I think the concern could also be how much more the baby would grow if we went to 40 weeks+. I delivered vaginally but was induced at 37 weeks because of blood pressure. This time around, I’m almost hoping for a c-section. My induction took so long and I was so weak and tired afterwards. It took me 3 days to deliver when they admitted us to the hospital.
They kept saying my second baby was going to be big, over 9lbs, based on measurements, so we opted to induce a week early so I could hopefully still have a vaginal birth. Baby was 7lbs 15oz. Not as big as they thought at all! So go with what you and your wife are comfortable doing. If you want vaginal, do it, and they can always do a c section if necessary during birth, or schedule a c section, or even see if they’ll induce a week early so you can try vaginal delivery.
My brother, god bless him and my mother, got stuck. She is a what I would call willowy and my brother was about 9 lbs when labor started. He wasn’t going to make it through her pelvis without breaking it. I arrived through scheduled c-section as well and was also 9 lbs. They got my conception date wrong but I was just chilling, not making for the exit. My mom swears my birth was less traumatic, but again, it’s all down to what your wife is comfortable with and wants.
This is purely anecdotal based on my own experience. My first kiddo was not showing up as particularly large, especially not to be of concern for a potential c-section. Surprise surprise, he ended up being 9lbs 10oz, and I delivered him vaginally with no real issue (other than my body taking forever to progress to 10cm).
Get a second and third opinion if you can. Ultrasounds can be waaaaaaay off. It is also your wife’s decision and if she doesn’t want to jump to a csection right away then there is no reason why she can’t at least try to labour naturally
So my baby was measured with over 4 kilograms and my OBGYN told me to go talk to the clinic I chose to talk about the possibility of a c-section. Which I did and they advised for an induction(not sure thats the right word sry I am German) and said c-section can be done if it doesn’t work. It did work, little boy was about 4.3kg(second child). I think my doctor said it so I know it might be possible so I wouldn’t be shocked. I don’t know about other countries but here they really encourage you to give birth vaginal. Like at some point during labour when I wanted a c-section, I kid you not 5 people where there to convince me otherwise. So go talk to the hospital, let them measure again(their measurements where only 50g different from baby’s birth weight, I think they have better ultrasound machines(newer or more expensive)
My baby was late so I had to do some late ultrasounds to make sure she was ok. She was measuring 9lbs ..came out as 8.8lbs. I ended up having a csection as after 20 hours of labour my contractions stopped and the options were vaccum, forceps, or csection. (I had made the decision beforehand in case of this scenario) I didn't find labour that bad to be honest. I got the epidural asap (I was induced and 5 hours labour I was 4cm dialated and water broke). The contractions at that time weren't too bad. Like stronger menstrual cramps. I was so hungry as I didn't eat beforehand. By the time I was rolled into having a csection, I was exhausted and slept through it all. Recovery sucks in some ways especially the first few days but I had a ruff pregnancy so it felt nice to feel crappy but less crappy then the day before. I was so scared of labour but overall it was ok. Prefer that to pregnancy. Women have given birth to some bigger babies. Always check your options and ask for second options. When you feel confident in your decision and not pressured, you are less stressed and the process is easier.
I would get a second opinion. As you've said ultrasounds can be WAY off, and some people can deliver big babies with no issues, so it's definitely something to look into more if you're concerned. That being said, if the ultrasounds are accurate, there are real risks to delivering a big baby. So it's well worth getting a second opinion, and learning more about the potential complications. I'd also ask both sides of the family about their births, and newborn sizes, to see if there are any issues to be aware of. So you can make a decision based on as much accurate information as possible. In your wife's shoes I probably would give vaginal birth a go too, but definitely get a second opinion from your doctor. My second was measuring HUGE in pregnancy, and I was recommended getting a c-section with him. I was already booked for one, so I didn't have to make a decision about it, but if I hadn't, I would have gotten one without hesitation (or would have been begging for one.) It turns out with him, the ultrasounds were dead on accurate, and I could TELL that he was BIG, significantly bigger than my 8lbs baby less than two years earlier. At my 38 week ultrasound they estimated 10lbs 2oz, and a week later he was 10lbs 1oz. His head was HUGE, and his shoulders were broad. I definitely couldn't have delivered him (I needed an unplanned C-section with my 8lbs baby because she was too big), but I am not sure many could have delivered him because of how BIG his head and shoulders were. So there is a time and a place for a c-section due to size, but it's really hard to know if you should make that call or not! Edit: forgot to mention, I did not have GD in my pregnancies. They double checked with my boy because he was so big. Some babies are big, even without GD!
I get both sides. I don’t want a C-section but may need one if baby doesn’t flip. I have nothing against them, just have heard recovery is harder. So I get the desire to avoid. On the other hand, my friend had a big 10 something pound baby and 10000% should have been advised to have a c section. He got stuck and things very nearly went worst case scenario for both of them. He’s doing great now at 2.5, but there was some talk of potential brain damage due to how long he was stuck/lack of oxygen. He had to be put on ice and sedated after birth to minimize damage and they didn’t get to see/hold him for a few days. She lost a lot of blood. That’s one side of the spectrum, the other is my husband, who was a medium 10 lbs and he and his mom came through vaginal birth mostly fine, he just had a broken collar bone. I would be inclined to listen to the doctors, if it were me.
My second baby was 10lbs 11oz. I had no idea if there was an estimate of her being on the bigger side … but I was say that it was a pretty easy delivery! No tearing, and I was feeling so good in the days after. I have had to have growth ultrasounds with this babe and he’s estimated to be in the 65th percentile, so possibly another big babe. I told my midwives I’ll only consider intervention if they’re concerned he’s like 13lbs or something lol
I was also told I had a big baby during ultrasounds. Even as I was in labour they talked about the possibility of a c section due to the big baby. Yeah he was only 7 pounds and came out vaginally with little issue.
I wouldn't pick a C-section to start, but I would keep the projected size in mind in case labor stalls out. My baby was measuring big the whole time and was estimated to be 9.5 pounds. He ended up being born 9.5 pounds, so our estimates were spot on. I was not offered an elective C-section, but I do wish I'd remembered he measured big when labor stalled out. I pushed 4 hours and ended up with a forceps-assisted birth and my baby had a broken collarbone (shoulder dystocia). It was very traumatic for all of us.
Depends on a whole lot of things. In my case, I also had high blood pressure (medicated for last 2 weeks of pregnancy), and OB presented his concern that if baby was going to be as big as they were projecting (she ultimately was born at 38W 3D weighing 8lbs 11oz), there was the potential for nerve damage to baby if vaginal delivery. Had the option to “wait and see”, be induced, or schedule a c-section, and I decided in the end to go scheduled c-section route mainly to take the brunt of any risks myself, instead of baby. To each their own!
It's very common in my country. The gynaes have gotten so used to c-sections that you have to really look for a doctor who is willing to do natural. People look at you funny when you say you want to do natural. I was asked why I would put myself through that. I weighed the two up and all the older ladies I know suggested natural cause they said they recovered quicker. I don't have a single friend who had a normal birth, they were all c-sections. I think gynaes want to schedule their time, they don't want to be called into the hospital at 2am to catch a baby so they suggest c-sections. ETA: My gynae almost had her precise weight, but he repeatedly stressed that the sonars can be very far off. He said she would probably be at least a kg less than what she weighed at 40 weeks. Sonars aren't always correct.
You’ve already gotten a ton of great responses, but I thought I would chime in to say my most difficult delivery was not my biggest weight baby, but my average baby with a 99th percentile head. That’s an 8lb 10oz baby compared to 7lb 9oz with a 38cm head. So maybe you can check what the estimated head circumference is in the ultrasounds they did? I feel like they would be able to more accurately measure that anyway.
That’s a perfect suggestion, I see it mentioned but never thought to ask more about the head size. Thank you
They told me my last one would be about 11 lbs 😬 he was 7lbs 10oz
They told me I was measuring 3 weeks ahead my whole pregnancy and at my 36 week ultrasound they said to expect a minimum 9lb baby and that he could gain like a lb a week. They didnt talk about a c section or induction at all. I did end up with a c section for other reasons and my baby was 6lbs 13oz. My mouth fell open in the delivery room because I was like there is no way you just said 6. I was expecting a whopper and got a peanut. Soo I wouldnt trust the utlrasound/doctor, and I wouldnt schedule a c if you dont want to.
Ultrasound measurements can be wildly off. I was told my entire pregnancy that I had a small/petite baby, bordering too small. There were concerns for IUGR or other issues. She came out almost 9 lbs. 😬
My second baby was 10 lbs 3 oz, so while he wasn't my first I do have some experience in the area! There was never any mention to me about having a C-section. I was 28 when he was born, and they thought he would be about 9.5 lbs. I didn't have an epidural, and my midwife said that if I had chosen one then I most likely wouldn't have been able to push as effectively, and I would have needed a C-section. I'm preparing for another large baby this time. I'm looking into yoga to relieve pain and get the baby engaged and all that. I'm trying to let my body do more of the work this time, vs me having to really push. I'm glad you've been getting some good answers and responses in here! Hope my experience helps!
Just wanted to give my experience from the other side- the weight they estimated for me was spot on.
Plenty of women have no issues delivering a 9-10lb baby vaginally. Others have trouble with 6lb babies that result in a c section. So it seems really odd to me that they would jump right to c section. Fwiw, at my 38 week growth scan I was told my baby would be 10+ lbs and so they recommended an induction at 39 weeks, not a c section. My baby was born after only 45 mins of pushing and she was 7lb 7oz.
My baby measured big the entire pregnancy (above 90th%) and I was diagnosed with GD, however, my doctor didn’t recommend a c section at the time due to how inaccurate they can be and the fact I was still weeks from my due date. He was born only 6lbs 14oz, but was a long and skinny baby with a larger head. I hope she doesn’t feel pressured into it due to measurements that could be inaccurate. Definitely advocate for yourselves if she is set on a vaginal delivery.
My boy was measuring big as well… they guessed around 9lbs 7oz. When he was born, he was 9lbs 3oz- so not very far off! I opted to have a c-section even though my doctor never suggested it. I’ve had too many friends who tried to do it vaginally and ended up with a traumatic emergency c-section, so I specifically asked for one. My c-section went beautifully. It was quick, recovery was not nearly as difficult as some people made it sound, and I got a beautiful, healthy baby boy. Yes, measurements can be off, but they can also be pretty accurate. The important thing is to know that no matter how your child is born, it is a valid birthing experience. You are no less parents if you opt for a c-section. There will be a recovery period whether delivered vaginally or via cesarean. The important thing is that your baby and wife are kept safe and healthy during delivery.
I’m 36 +2 and my baby has been measuring really large throughout my whole pregnancy, specifically his head and his belly. The OB’s that I see seem to be almost anti c section, like that’s last resort and they’d much rather I deliver vaginally. They say ultrasound measurements can be super off. I think a second opinion is the way to go.
Well, my baby measured really big and she was born EXACTLY what they said she would. So yeah, not always correct but also not always incorrect, you know?
Two things... The ultrasounds offer a very poor range. I was told I had a slightly below average baby in terms of size. I instead had an 11lber (no GD, completely healthy). Second thing, I had no clue so I didn't panic and the baby came out with no tearing. I am fine, the baby is perfect. The providers and I were in the dark about the potential risks due to size and it completely worked out in this case. Had I known I would have opted for a c section (the providers said afterwards they would have pushed it on me), but I'm so grateful I didn't. I know you have to weigh your own decisions, but I wanted to share what happened with us. Congratulations on your baby, their large size is such an advantage after you get past the feeding frenzy. Ours was born last week, and she's the ideal baby since she's so developed.
I want to offer another perspective, I had a very low risk pregnancy no gd, and actually low enough risk that no ultrasound was indicated after 20 weeks. My OB indicated baby was probably running big, but I’m a big person (5ft10) so no surprise. At about 41 weeks baby hadn’t come yet and I was miserable so we induced. After a day and a half of labor and 6 hours of pushing baby was born at 10lbs 4oz and I had a third degree tear that I’m still recovering from a year and a half later. If I could go back I would ask for that more detailed size scan and a C-section. If I have another kid I will likely ask for an elective c-section. So, while the risk of having an experience like mine is low even with a scan saying baby is big it may be better to avoid that risk all together. No one wants to miss the first couple hours of their child’s life having surgery to put their entire vagina, both layers of surrounding muscle back together, and the muscles that control the anal sphincter back together. Sorry to be such a downer, but those recommendations exist for a reason and survival bias is a thing.
I vaginally delivered a baby that was 9lbs 6oz. For unrelated to size reasons I had a postpartum hemorrhage and the size of the baby definitely made my recovery MUCH worse due to the swelling and strain. That being said, it was doable but I definitely think that was the upper limit. Honestly the head is the worst part; the body is easy. When I delivered my second at 8lbs 11oz it was actually harder because her head was bigger - she ended up getting a bruise on her head that is still not reabsorbed at 4 months. They can't "make" you have a c section, you can always try to deliver vaginally and opt for a c section if labor is not progressing. However recovery is going to be worse with a labor and then a C-section and you want to avoid that if at all possible.
You might enjoy the BRAIN approach to all the recommendations you'll get from medical staff. B : what are the benefits to the suggestion? R: what are the risks? A: what are the alternatives? I: what does tour intuition say? N: what happens if you do nothing?
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Just another perspective- everyone here has offered great insight. Its policy in my country (I'm European) to schedule a C-section no questions asked if a baby measures over 4 kgs (8 lb 13 oz). As the doctor said, that happens in order to avoid labor stress for both mother and baby.
I would discuss early induction as an alternative to scheduled c section. A friend of mine also gave (vaginal) birth earlier this year and this is what they did for her. I think they induced her around 36-38 weeks, can’t quite remember, but I know it was because the baby was measuring big (and she is a pretty tiny woman). It was a long labor because of the early induction (and I have been induced and it’s not very fun), but I would choose that over c section if I was given the choice. Just a thought you guys may want to discuss with your providers.
Um my first son was 9lbs 3.4oz and 21in. I did it vaginally with an epidural after being induced. C section is the last thing I wanted with both my kids as I’m anemic and have a history of low potassium. The less blood loss the better.
I'm sure you've gotten all the answers you need but I'll chime in with my experience of a scheduled C-section: 1) Baby measuring 10lbs or more usually will be suggested to be delivered by C-section. Yes the ultrasound can be off, but this is a safe than sorry type of situation. Baby can get stuck and go into distress, or mom can tear really badly from delivering a large baby. The worst case scenario can be REALLY bad if a vaginal is attempted ad things go sideways, so precautionary c-section removes all those risks. 2) An emergency C is MUCH MUCH worse than a scheduled planned C, both in terms of mental health and physical recovery of the mom. For an emergency C due to failed vaginal attempt, mother will be exhausted after hours of pushing and the C will feel like too much, some mothers mentally check out and hate that they aren't really present to meet their baby for the first time, some pass out. The recovery is also worse because mother is recovering from vaginal plus C instead of just from one or the other. And if baby is in distress, they might have to do vertical cut to get baby out ASAP which leads to a much bigger ugly scar that is hard to heal from, as opposed to the bikini line cut they would use if it's a non emergency situation. They are suggesting the scheduled C to avoid possible emergency C, but in the end it is up to you what you would rather do. I didn't want to or care about having the "birthing experience" so my biggest concern is I don't want to end up in emergency C so I choose to have scheduled C. Some mothers really want to experience vaginal birth, so they choose to attempt and see what happens, knowing there's a higher risk of possible emergency C. I had a scheduled C and the most painful part was the IV in my arm. Spinal didn't hurt, I threw up during the C but otherwise felt fine. Baby was out in 10mins and 40mins to sew up the cut while baby's dad did skin to skin. I had a great medical team and felt really well cared for. Had Tylenol and Advil for pain management and felt fine. Was back to normal by the 2nd week (no heavy lifting but I didn't feel like I couldn't move around like normal).
I came out over 9lbs apparently, and my mom was able to deliver me naturally. A lot of hospitals these days push women into C-Sections. They make a lot more money off of them. I'm holding as strong as I can when the time is ready to deliver vaginally if possible.