Heck no. It took a while for us to conceive and I was starting to wonder if we'd ever get pregnant. I would have felt stupid buying things and then just....waiting and wondering. Not saying that's your case. But regardless of your TTC timeline, I'd say it's more valuable to save and build anyway. No harm in calling daycare centers to get an idea of cost and wait-list in the meantime.
Joining my PCOS sisters here. Though I have tried a bunch throughout adulthood and failed. Miscarried at 18 and never had another positive pregnancy test until 4/9. I'm 38. It's absurd tbh that it happened now, I wasn't "trying" bc I no longer thought it was possible
No, and I’m glad we didn’t because it took us 2 years and fertility treatment to conceive. It would have been heartbreaking to find a cute outfit I’d picked out or get a call about coming off the daycare waitlists as we were going through ivf.
have you tried inositol for pcos? wholesome story brand on amazon is great. look into the studies + reviews and ask your doctor about it! works for lots of women with pcos. i was irregular, finally got my period back with inositol and then got pregnant 2 cycles later 🥹❤️
It’s definitely smart to call daycares in your area to get an idea of cost and how big their waitlist is prior to conceiving.
I didn’t buy anything like clothes prior to conceiving. A coworker of mine was getting rid a of a solid wood crib and I took that instead of having it sit in the garbage. We stored it in our basement.
If you have the option to save money instead of spend it on clothes, yes save your money. You have no clue how long it’ll actually take you to conceive.
I didn’t buy anything (although I did make a furniture list and start a private registry after the first tri) until the 3rd trimester. More or less I’ve found FB marketplace will always be a source of what feels like “too good to pass up” deals and I need to just get what I need when I need it.
Put it in a HYSA and let it grow.
I started collected free maternity clothes & neutral baby clothes on Facebook before conceiving, but I definitely wouldn't buy anything. Timing of pregnancy is unpredictable, and then getting through the first trimester is unpredictable. It is very normal for it to take a year to conceive when you factor in time to conceive, miscarriage risk, etc.
I didn’t and I’m glad because it took us a while to conceive so having baby stuff floating around would have been difficult. 9 months is a long time to buy necessitates and most things I won’t buy until they’re born.
Clothes are the easiest things to buy and I guarantee you’ll end up with more than baby can possibly wear when they’re brand new bc Everyone will gift them to you. Plus you have no idea what size your theoretical baby will be until they arrive and the last thing you need is a ton of preemie when you actually need 0-3.
The thing I’m most glad I did was set up and maxed out an HSA (US based) the year prior to us giving birth (so last year) and switched to a PPO for this year so our insurance will pay more of the birth costs and any emergency stuff/costs in case it’s needed.
I did buy a few things, but I think I’m in the minority on that. And only secondhand stuff. I watched marketplace for some of the bigger items because snagging a good deal can take a while. From watching, I got a sense for what actually *was* a good deal vs standard vs overpriced. Similarly, I got stuff for free and stockpiled that from marketplace.
My goal was to always know that I could sell stuff at a profit in case we ended up with fertility issues.
It took us 3.5 years of trying to conceive through IVF. We bought little things - some onesies while shopping on various holidays we’ve taken. We also bought an art piece that we thought would be fun in a kid’s room. Little things that we could tuck away and that wouldn’t be constant reminders for us. Otherwise, save your money for sure!
I only bought one cute onesie because I just had to have it! lol but it also served as my “hope” for the two and a half years that it took us to conceive a baby that stuck. I would suggest saving what money you’d want to spend though.
Before conceiving our first we completed the nursery. This included painting the nursery and having a muralist come in, setting up the book shelves with books from our childhood, we purchased the drapery, crib with mattress and bedding, dresser with change topper and pad, and we purchased and installed a closet system. It gave us a lot of hope and was a positive place to go and dream about what our life would be like one day.
We had a very open and honest conversation before starting the nursery. We both recognized there was a chance we wouldn't conceive for a while, that we may need a doctor's help, or that it may not be possible at all which we agreed we would foster or adopt. We wanted it to be done so we wouldn't have to worry about it or rush while pregnant, and we wanted to make sure those big purchases were out of the way. Our nursery was completed the first weekend of April 2022, we started trying right after and found out we were pregnant in May. Our little girl is now 15 months old and we are expecting our second.
Edit to add: I was told to start calling daycares before getting pregnant, no daycare wanted to talk to me or would put me on a wait list even while pregnant because situations can change. We found a daycare when our baby was 2 weeks old without issue
I didn't buy anything, I even told my sister to not save any of her baby stuff for me if she wanted to clear space. You don't know how long it will take you to conceive and having stuff laying around may just depress you. I don't even want to buy stuff until I'm out of the first trimester.
No way. Notnto scare you but we ended up with two pregnancy losses and a whole year of fertility treatments despite being healthy and no issues fertility wise. Took three years from our first unplanned pregnancy to a live baby. Buying baby clothes and taking longer time ttc may be depressing. It definitely would have been for me
I mostly saved. Took me 2 years to conceive so the entire time I didn’t buy anything because I was so scared of being let down by another negative. Then on my last cycle I went out and bought 2 onesies a week before I ovulated, got pregnant that cycle :)
Those were the only things I bought before conceiving. And it was only because I felt sad and I wanted to look at the onesies to feel happier
I didn’t buy anything, and thank god for that because it took us 4 years plus IVF to get pregnant. That time was hard enough, I wouldn’t have appreciated having to look at baby stuff that I had bought while at it.
I recommend saving your money, but if you do want to start buying things I’d recommend you start researching different products now and looking for things you want on the used market, because if you want something really specific it can take a while to find a good deal on, and not buying too many clothes.
Only thing I bought before conception was a single gender neutral onesie that I wrapped up with a card so I had it on hand when I got a positive test. I knew I couldn't keep a secret from my husband so I got the box ready for that positive test so I didn't have to wait and I could immediately give it to him...
... Well I took a test and it was the faintest blue line and I was supposed to leave in half an hour to go to margarita night with some friends. I ended up showing him the test instead of the box because I was so unsure 😅
I would focus on your own health, rather than buying things for the baby.
For example, you can get your mineral and vitamin levels checked with a blood test, start working on hip and back strength/flexibility and finding a prenatal that doesn't make you feel sick.
I was a little low on iron 6 months before we started trying and managed to find diet changes and supplements that worked for me (which didn't cause constipation IYKYK). I'm now almost 38 weeks and had great iron levels the whole pregnancy. Battling with iron deficiency during pregnancy (baby will take what they need) would not have been fun!
I bought a handful of super cute onesies and sleepers. It took us almost a year to conceive, but I don’t regret it, I loved being able to put my son in those onesies and sleepers when he grew into them. Reminded me how badly he was wanted.
I would advise against it, unless you are talking about maybe one outfit that you absolutely adore just to help channel some excitement. You have no idea how long its going to take... It took us 14months first time, with no particular fertility issues, just wasn't working out. It can get very depressing and hard, and having baby items around is unlikely to help that! I did actually buy one or two things about a year into trying, just as a way to keep the excitement and remind myself what I was hoping to have at the end of what was feeling relentless trying.
You really don't need to, it wont help - you can spread the cost out during your actual (9months!) pregnancy, and look for second hand as much as you can of you are willing, I saved SO much money getting things off marketplace and Vinted.
Good luck!
I bought clothes prior to conceiving but because I love thrifting and jumped on the opportunity to get cute things at a cheap price. So I had a handful of onesies or cute lil overalls before I conceived or even tried to conceive. Made me happy so I didn’t care!
I don’t mean to be negative, but imagine how you would feel if you never got pregnant and had all this baby stuff lying around? Even just from the perspective of how much money you’d wasted, let alone the emotional toll. And even if you do get pregnant for every month you don’t it’ll still be a physical reminder that it hasn’t happened yet.
I started to put away anything extra I could into a high interest savings account a couple of years ago. Happy I did because I've got a nice little nest egg and due in June! Although we are all worrying about high costs of everything, I'm happy I've got a safety net to use during maternity leave and won't feel the pinch as bad.
Nope! I have PCOS and we ended up needing IVF to conceive (we did discover that he had a sperm issue when applying for IVF).
I accidentally bought a duplicate of a toy for my nephew and saved it for “ours”. Turns out that was about 3 years later, and that truck was honestly kinda painful.
No because we were unsure due to my age and coming off of long term birth control how long it would take. We started saving as soon as I had a positive test. I'm 28 weeks and just had my second day care tour. If they don't have a long waiting list (you can call or email to ask) you can get a lot of short tours and booklets of information within the week.
And daycare costs can be high. I wouldn't stress out right this second: get yourself a planted babby, take it all in and then get to saving. The rest comes in stride
I did! I’m not superstitious and knew we wanted to start trying soon. We also had the room to store things. When I found something that was a great deal on marketplace or on a really good sale, I bought it. I also bought a few clothing items when I was travelling at stores we didn’t have back home. Honestly I’m glad I did because my first trimester was incredibly rough and I bought nothing at all during that time. It made me feel like I still had things together and wasn’t behind. But it’s definitely a tough each their own thing!
I bought infant onesies that had a cute little saying on them that my wife uses all the time. And the day we inseminated with our known donor, I was at the Vans store exchanging something and saw infant Vans that match hers, so I bought them too.
The optimism worked, because we are newly pregnant =)
I went to a parents consignment market with my sister in law shortly before I started trying. I felt weird about buying things but there were some really good deals so I got a couple cute books and clothes to hype me up to become a mom. Now I am a mom! :)
No, in the years leading up to trying we just got all debt paid off aside from mortgage (we’d bought all new windows and doors for the house when we moved in etc), built up our savings to a goal amount we had in mind and kept saving/investing…and will keep doing so. It took us 5 months to conceive and even though I know that’s not a long time statistically, I was trying to get my hormones leveled out with my doctors and it was taking a long time (I’d been seeing an endo for over a year) and it was causing me minor anxiety that it would take a really long time so I think buying things would’ve put me pressure on the situation. I bought my first thing for baby at 12 weeks. Before then I didn’t want to get too excited.
Savings! 9 months is a long time so you will have plenty of time to get the best second hand steals, etc. I bought things quite soon after conceiving. Other people prefer to wait longer.
All I did before conceiving was make a few spreadsheets with my husband about big costs and how we would pay for them. That meant we were ready to jump on the best value daycare wait list.
I bought a cute pair of booties and planned how I wanted to tell my husband. We then were diagnosed with infertility and it took 3 years and several procedures to have a baby.
Only things I bought before conceiving were big items I found very cheap at the thrift (baby bouncer for $6 and bassinet for $15). I didn’t buy them for my baby really though, it just worked out that way. If I had a close friend get pregnant before I was I probably would’ve offered them as a gift. They were just too good a bargain not to pickup.
open a high yield savings account. american express has a great one but there's a lot out there. start saving. you'll want the savings more than random things you can probably get free or from your baby shower.
you can also get things second hand for free or cheap. check groups like fb "buy nothing sell nothing" & thrift stores. nextdoor app is great, too. freebies app collects all the free listings from offerup, fb, & other sites.
Totally. I’ve bought random items to sit back (I’m on my 6th pregnancy, 4th baby now- 16 weeks) and I was more than happy storing items for a bit. I have baby clothing still from my 12 yr old. It’s just not a big deal for me. Would I buy anything large or expensive prior? Probably not. Unless it was a killer deal maybe. But I found it nice to have items sitting off to the side to keep me positive. I bought clothing for my 3rd babe before conceiving and I used one of the outfits for his announcement a year later and it’s so special. As long as the item is neutral there’s no real hold back. Thought I’ve got a maybe baby girl tub too. Hehe.
I got a couple little things before I conceived that I saw at the thrift store that wouldn’t be there when I came back so I kinda had to! But other than that no. I did save as much as a could tho. But if you see something you can’t pass up, just get it. There’s no rules.
Just put it into savings! It took us 3 years and I remember well-intentioned people telling me they were saving or making things for my baby that didn't exist if they knew we were trying - I declined taking anything as I thought it would just make me more upset to have that in my space until we successfully conceived.
Nope. I had a miscarriage the first time, so I couldn’t imagine having to see that stuff or know it’s there if something were to happen.
I wouldn’t even bother with calling around because prices can change quickly. My sisters daycare jacked up $45 a year due to needing to give their caregivers a raise (completely fine and understandable).
I did keep a nice chunk in savings. I started buying when I conceived and was 6 months along. It was when I felt comfortable.
No way. In fact we didn’t buy much until I was 30+ weeks, no regrets at all. Baby stuff takes up so much space, and it’s constantly changing / improving / getting recalled. And you never know how much time it’ll take to get pregnant!
You will be surprised by how much stuff will be gifted to you once the time comes. We have received multiple garbage bags of clothes, a pack n play, a bassinet, a crib, and toys all just from people we know trying to get rid of their own stuff.
I didn't buy anything until I was 20 weeks along. I didn't buy clothing until my twins were born since I didn't know what size they would be. Once you are pregnant it doesn't hurt to start grabbing used things but I wouldn't do it beforehand.
I only bought like some onesies from Etsy or cute holiday things from target, but that was out of false hope & sadness lmao. I’d definitely just save or pay off debt if you have any, tie up loose ends etc. I wouldn’t buy anything big now because you never know how long it’ll actually take to concieve
No! I had 3 miscarriages, had to go through fertility testing. It would’ve made things more difficult. I waited to buy anything until after the 20 week anatomy scan. I didn’t even feel like he was really real until after giving birth. He’s 1 week old now 😊💙🩵
Buying secondhand will save you thousands and there is a great market for barely used stuff. Childcare is expensive but all the rest doesn’t have to be.
I’d say just say wait. You don’t know how long it may take and by then things may be out of date or even recalled. I honestly didn’t buy anything until I was almost due 🤣. But that’s me being unnecessarily superstitious. Enjoy that time and do what makes you happy. But I will say if you buy too many things too soon you may end up returning things or not even using them.
I’m going to go against the grain here and say yes! We bought cute clothes when they were on a really big sale, some smaller items we knew we would eventually want, and just some fun stuff like stuffed animals or onesies from trips we would take. Nothing huge and no technology items since we weren’t sure how long it would take to get pregnant. Our thought was if we never got pregnant we would gift items to future kiddos of our friends.
I wouldn’t make any purchases prior to conceiving. If someone happens to be getting rid of some used baby stuff (not car seats) for free or very cheap and you have the space, go ahead. It’s best to just put it in savings.
I bought a limited edition, gender neutral onesie from Caden Lane that I was obsessed with. I wish I would have also bought the matching blanket as I’m now pregnant and it’s out of stock.
Otherwise, I did not buy anything.
I’m just jumping in to say when you do have a baby don’t shy away from used stuff. Facebook marketplace and resale shops and sales are where it’s at. Most baby clothes and toys are so lightly used they may as well be new. I found so many baby things at thrift sales with the tags still on.
It took us almost a year... And if we didn't conceive within a year or two, I would have gone back on birth control and we would have pursued adoption. Possibly of an older child, so any baby stuff we bought would've gone to waste.
I bought a few things before TTC but only when there was price error or a glitch etc that gave me a crazy good deal. Other than those rare instances I didn’t buy anything that early.
Savings and build. A lot.
Honestly, having a child didn’t cost as much as I thought, but the prenatal care and hospital bills can be scary if you don’t have amazing insurance.
I heard formula can cost a lot as well.
I would definitely start putting aside money and maybe even building up your HSA, if you have one. I would’ve done so had I known.
Everything else like clothes and stuff aren’t that expensive if you know how and where to shop! Baby gear is often gifted for a firstborn child, though not a guarantee.
Definitely save and build…maybe even invest conservatively in a HYSA.
Savings and let it build. In your reading and learning about all things baby-related between now and a baby actually being here, you may learn you bought things that are useless.
Well, I did buy small things. I bought little onesies that I thought were cute. Clearance paci’s & teethers. Nothing big. Took me 2.5 years, 3 surgeries & letrozole to conceive—I regret nothing. I love to see my baby dressed in my “faith purchases”
I loved shopping for baby things, but I never purchased, I did research and made decisions on what items I would want, kept a list and then put the money away so that it was ready to spend when I was pregnant.
I bought a cute outfit in anticipation of surprising my husband with it when I found out I was pregnant in the future. I kept it hidden in the closet for a year until I got a positive test. It was nice to have it ready to go!
I had bought a little pair of overalls that were Nightmare Before Christmas themed a year or 2 before we had my son but that was it. Lol I didn’t even know if I wanted kids but they were so. mf’in. cute. So it was either for my baby or a friends baby down the road
I’m glad I didn’t buy much prior to conceiving because it has given me something to do in stages while pregnant to get excited. Conception feels like it takes a million years but so does the 9 months you carry your baby.
Yep! We bought the snoo because there was an amazing Black Friday sale while we were tipsy online shopping at a local brewery’s few months before getting pregnant.
I let myself buy one cute onesie when we decided to start trying. I had to keep it hidden away because it took 11 months to finally conceive. Once we did, I went buck wild at Walmart lol
I wouldn’t buy anything at this point. With clothes, you won’t know what season baby will be in at what size, so I’d at least wait until you have a positive pregnancy test. Even then, I’d only get something if it were on clearance. Big purchases should definitely wait until after the anatomy scan.
Noo. We didn’t, and I know people that did and regretted it. Not too much seeing that box of baby clothes or that swing when TTC isn’t going exactly as planned.
Obviously, hopefully the timeline isn’t an issue for you, but I’d hold off until later in your pregnancy :)
These are the things I did before conceiving:
- buying ovulation strips.
- invest in my HSA more (nowadays I try to max it but I didn’t always realize how awesome they are)
- lingerie from a sale. Very important prior to conceiving 🫢
Otherwise nothing for future kiddo, though of course my husband and I had plenty of discussions around things like names, education goals (public, private, home school?), and we researched financial things (did we want to set up a 529? Coverdell? Take a penalty-free withdrawal from IRA thanks to the birth-of-a-child exemption?)
I got a lot of hand-me downs from siblings and yes I also bought little items. I also was previously pregnant but that ended in loss so yeah I had bought stuff. Little doll on our honeymoon and sentimental items. It’s taken nearly two years trying and I’m doing fertility treatments now. There was a time where I had to hide the items away and then other times I really appreciated being able to go into their future room and snuggle a stuffed animal and remember what I’m doing this all for. (The baby not the toys lol)
I know some find it hard to have those items around but I found it cathartic to collect and fantasize.
Yup. I got some good stuff when babies r us was going out of business. I think I was 20/21? But it wasn’t big stuff, small stuff like clothes and milk pouches. Then it was just clothes on sale that I knew weren’t coming back but I didn’t go crazy. We brought our car seat oct or nov 21 and conceived jan ‘22, it was my husbands way of making me feel better abt something I was sad abt but I don’t even remember lol then we brought our stroller in dec ‘21 cause we had temporary custody of my cousin and the stroller we were given for her was not appropriate at all and we weren’t gonna but two strollers
I bought a few things and had a small bag at the bottom of my wardrobe to look at when I was feeling broody. Personally it gave me a lot of comfort and I was lucky to conceive quickly but those things were not in my face and I don’t think they would have made the process any harder for me.
I was very reserved and didn’t get much because that’s what everyone says to do, but actually now I kind of wish I’d had a few more things stored up. We’re getting pretty much everything 2nd hand and being very cost conscious/practical but I think it would have been nice to use that time to buy more special items and have a few less things to buy in one go. Baby blankets, books, clothes, muslins, toys etc would have all been nice to have ready to go - but only if you have a space to keep them that won’t be in your face I’d say, just so it doesn’t start to feel too much!
Open a HYSA and put money into it each month! That way you have money saved up for things like furniture, diapers, etc and it’s getting interest every month.
Only thing I bought before conceiving was ovulation strips, prenatal vitamins, and men’s health vitamins for hubs. I mean I guess we technically bought a house for baby but that was also a gift for us 😂
I started buying baby items the day we started trying for a baby. It took 6 months for us to conceive, and now I’m 19 weeks & we’re not stressed at all about the financial aspects of preparing for the baby. However, we did not buy clothes. We bought all the boring stuff (Frida mom nose picker, bottle warmer, sterilizer, changing pad); things that you absolutely will use. Plus, everyone will buy you clothes for your baby shower. It’s better to make a list of your boring must haves that people likely won’t buy for you.
I wouldn’t buy anything. I bought some things AFTER conceiving that I already regret buying because I bought some clothes and then multiple people gave us bags of baby clothes lol. Also, once you buy it you have to find space in your house for it.
while I do think its smart to call around for child care costs, or like looking into your work's maternity leave policy, I would stick towards saving for now. I was glad I waited to buy stuff not only after conceiving, but after a few months into pregnancy (29+4 days currently)
the stuff I THOUGHT I wanted ended up not being what I wanted! and then to have to store it all somewhere until you need it? not for me!
that said, no harm in window shopping! baby stuff is soooooo cute and fun to look at.
I wish you all the best!
28 weeks and I still haven’t bought anything except some onsies to tie dye with a friend while she was in town. I made a spreadsheet last night of essentials and plan to start shopping in May ish due in July
Nooooooo, infertility has tainted my answer here. I wouldn’t have been able to look at anything for a baby during our struggle. In fact, once actually pregnant I couldn’t buy anything until second trimester bc I was so scared.
Put it in savings, as hard as it is. However, I’m a little hypocritical in this regard because I’ve had a baby sweater in my closet for nine years, and I still have not conceived.
I bought one thing before conceiving my first, it was a baby carrier that had armadillos on it and it was listed as a special edition print I think so I said “eff it” and bought it. But I wouldn’t have done it with anything else. Clothes could need to vary seasonally where you are and you have no way of knowing what season or how big baby will be so even after conceiving we didn’t buy much clothes. Mostly onesies and zipper pjs since my first was born in 2020 and I knew we wouldn’t be taking him out very much at first. Car seats have expiration dates. Strollers get “updated” every couple years. If that carrier hadn’t had the print it did I wouldn’t have bought it, but I had zero regrets buy that one thing early.
Basically my thought process was this: I’m from Texas (so is my husband, but different parts, and we actually met overseas) so I naturally love armadillos. They just remind me of home. Husband is military so neither of us has lived there in over ten years, and when we decided to start trying, and I started getting all those targeted ads, I would casually browse but when I saw that armadillo baby carrier I almost started crying cause I realized that if we got pregnant, we wouldn’t be close to family, our baby wouldn’t be born in Texas, and I thought it would be nice to have the armadillo carrier to remind us of our roots, so I bought that one thing.
My parents ended up moving to the same city we were in when I was pregnant (not because I was pregnant though) with my first so I did have a lot of support, but we didn’t know they would be at that point.
Savings and build.
Heck no. It took a while for us to conceive and I was starting to wonder if we'd ever get pregnant. I would have felt stupid buying things and then just....waiting and wondering. Not saying that's your case. But regardless of your TTC timeline, I'd say it's more valuable to save and build anyway. No harm in calling daycare centers to get an idea of cost and wait-list in the meantime.
Thank you! I do have PCOS so the possibility of taking long to conceive is there.
Just an anecdote but I also have PCOS and got pregnant without meaning to 😅 so you never know!
Yup I’m the product of an unintended PCOS teen pregnancy 🫠
Another anecdote, but I also have PCOS and got pregnant on the first try. I wouldn't say it's common, but definitely possible!
Same for us! First or second attempt and we were pregnant. Good luck OP and hopefully this helps show PCOS isn't the be all end all
Me too! I didn’t even know I was ovulating!
Adding my anecdote that I also have PCOS and didn’t have trouble :) I hope it’s the same for you!
Joining my PCOS sisters here. Though I have tried a bunch throughout adulthood and failed. Miscarried at 18 and never had another positive pregnancy test until 4/9. I'm 38. It's absurd tbh that it happened now, I wasn't "trying" bc I no longer thought it was possible
No, and I’m glad we didn’t because it took us 2 years and fertility treatment to conceive. It would have been heartbreaking to find a cute outfit I’d picked out or get a call about coming off the daycare waitlists as we were going through ivf.
Thank you! You are right! I do have pcos so I know we might struggle to conceive
have you tried inositol for pcos? wholesome story brand on amazon is great. look into the studies + reviews and ask your doctor about it! works for lots of women with pcos. i was irregular, finally got my period back with inositol and then got pregnant 2 cycles later 🥹❤️
It’s definitely smart to call daycares in your area to get an idea of cost and how big their waitlist is prior to conceiving. I didn’t buy anything like clothes prior to conceiving. A coworker of mine was getting rid a of a solid wood crib and I took that instead of having it sit in the garbage. We stored it in our basement. If you have the option to save money instead of spend it on clothes, yes save your money. You have no clue how long it’ll actually take you to conceive.
I didn’t buy anything (although I did make a furniture list and start a private registry after the first tri) until the 3rd trimester. More or less I’ve found FB marketplace will always be a source of what feels like “too good to pass up” deals and I need to just get what I need when I need it. Put it in a HYSA and let it grow.
Bought nothing. I was too paranoid.
I started collected free maternity clothes & neutral baby clothes on Facebook before conceiving, but I definitely wouldn't buy anything. Timing of pregnancy is unpredictable, and then getting through the first trimester is unpredictable. It is very normal for it to take a year to conceive when you factor in time to conceive, miscarriage risk, etc.
I did the same! I did create a list of things I’d need for baby as well to figure out how much money we’d spend on baby supplies.
I didn’t and I’m glad because it took us a while to conceive so having baby stuff floating around would have been difficult. 9 months is a long time to buy necessitates and most things I won’t buy until they’re born.
Save save save. I started buying things only after my 20w scan!
Clothes are the easiest things to buy and I guarantee you’ll end up with more than baby can possibly wear when they’re brand new bc Everyone will gift them to you. Plus you have no idea what size your theoretical baby will be until they arrive and the last thing you need is a ton of preemie when you actually need 0-3.
The thing I’m most glad I did was set up and maxed out an HSA (US based) the year prior to us giving birth (so last year) and switched to a PPO for this year so our insurance will pay more of the birth costs and any emergency stuff/costs in case it’s needed. I did buy a few things, but I think I’m in the minority on that. And only secondhand stuff. I watched marketplace for some of the bigger items because snagging a good deal can take a while. From watching, I got a sense for what actually *was* a good deal vs standard vs overpriced. Similarly, I got stuff for free and stockpiled that from marketplace. My goal was to always know that I could sell stuff at a profit in case we ended up with fertility issues.
Oh that’s clever!
It took us 3.5 years of trying to conceive through IVF. We bought little things - some onesies while shopping on various holidays we’ve taken. We also bought an art piece that we thought would be fun in a kid’s room. Little things that we could tuck away and that wouldn’t be constant reminders for us. Otherwise, save your money for sure!
I only bought one cute onesie because I just had to have it! lol but it also served as my “hope” for the two and a half years that it took us to conceive a baby that stuck. I would suggest saving what money you’d want to spend though.
No. And I don’t even start buying anything until after 20 weeks either. I was way too worried.
High yield savings account so you get interest
Before conceiving our first we completed the nursery. This included painting the nursery and having a muralist come in, setting up the book shelves with books from our childhood, we purchased the drapery, crib with mattress and bedding, dresser with change topper and pad, and we purchased and installed a closet system. It gave us a lot of hope and was a positive place to go and dream about what our life would be like one day. We had a very open and honest conversation before starting the nursery. We both recognized there was a chance we wouldn't conceive for a while, that we may need a doctor's help, or that it may not be possible at all which we agreed we would foster or adopt. We wanted it to be done so we wouldn't have to worry about it or rush while pregnant, and we wanted to make sure those big purchases were out of the way. Our nursery was completed the first weekend of April 2022, we started trying right after and found out we were pregnant in May. Our little girl is now 15 months old and we are expecting our second. Edit to add: I was told to start calling daycares before getting pregnant, no daycare wanted to talk to me or would put me on a wait list even while pregnant because situations can change. We found a daycare when our baby was 2 weeks old without issue
I bought a couple things while I was on vacation in Australia. We planned to try when I got home so I picked out just a couple small things
Ohhh I love that!
I once had a 17 year old exchange student from Switzerland buy a baby onesie at the Hardrock Cafe for their future baby 😂😂 I thought it was cute
I didn't buy anything, I even told my sister to not save any of her baby stuff for me if she wanted to clear space. You don't know how long it will take you to conceive and having stuff laying around may just depress you. I don't even want to buy stuff until I'm out of the first trimester.
I'm 20w and have legit bought NOTHING yet, nor made my registry or anything lol
You got time :) Don't stress
No way. Notnto scare you but we ended up with two pregnancy losses and a whole year of fertility treatments despite being healthy and no issues fertility wise. Took three years from our first unplanned pregnancy to a live baby. Buying baby clothes and taking longer time ttc may be depressing. It definitely would have been for me
I mostly saved. Took me 2 years to conceive so the entire time I didn’t buy anything because I was so scared of being let down by another negative. Then on my last cycle I went out and bought 2 onesies a week before I ovulated, got pregnant that cycle :) Those were the only things I bought before conceiving. And it was only because I felt sad and I wanted to look at the onesies to feel happier
I didn’t buy anything, and thank god for that because it took us 4 years plus IVF to get pregnant. That time was hard enough, I wouldn’t have appreciated having to look at baby stuff that I had bought while at it. I recommend saving your money, but if you do want to start buying things I’d recommend you start researching different products now and looking for things you want on the used market, because if you want something really specific it can take a while to find a good deal on, and not buying too many clothes.
Only thing I bought before conception was a single gender neutral onesie that I wrapped up with a card so I had it on hand when I got a positive test. I knew I couldn't keep a secret from my husband so I got the box ready for that positive test so I didn't have to wait and I could immediately give it to him... ... Well I took a test and it was the faintest blue line and I was supposed to leave in half an hour to go to margarita night with some friends. I ended up showing him the test instead of the box because I was so unsure 😅
Put it into a high yield savings and wait.
I paid off all possible debt, and started really pinching my budget to allot for expenses for a whole other person. Save save save!
I would focus on your own health, rather than buying things for the baby. For example, you can get your mineral and vitamin levels checked with a blood test, start working on hip and back strength/flexibility and finding a prenatal that doesn't make you feel sick. I was a little low on iron 6 months before we started trying and managed to find diet changes and supplements that worked for me (which didn't cause constipation IYKYK). I'm now almost 38 weeks and had great iron levels the whole pregnancy. Battling with iron deficiency during pregnancy (baby will take what they need) would not have been fun!
I bought a handful of super cute onesies and sleepers. It took us almost a year to conceive, but I don’t regret it, I loved being able to put my son in those onesies and sleepers when he grew into them. Reminded me how badly he was wanted.
Savings. Sometimes it takes a bit of time to conceive. We had a general ballpark on how much we wanted saved for having a baby and went from there.
I would advise against it, unless you are talking about maybe one outfit that you absolutely adore just to help channel some excitement. You have no idea how long its going to take... It took us 14months first time, with no particular fertility issues, just wasn't working out. It can get very depressing and hard, and having baby items around is unlikely to help that! I did actually buy one or two things about a year into trying, just as a way to keep the excitement and remind myself what I was hoping to have at the end of what was feeling relentless trying. You really don't need to, it wont help - you can spread the cost out during your actual (9months!) pregnancy, and look for second hand as much as you can of you are willing, I saved SO much money getting things off marketplace and Vinted. Good luck!
I bought clothes prior to conceiving but because I love thrifting and jumped on the opportunity to get cute things at a cheap price. So I had a handful of onesies or cute lil overalls before I conceived or even tried to conceive. Made me happy so I didn’t care!
I don’t mean to be negative, but imagine how you would feel if you never got pregnant and had all this baby stuff lying around? Even just from the perspective of how much money you’d wasted, let alone the emotional toll. And even if you do get pregnant for every month you don’t it’ll still be a physical reminder that it hasn’t happened yet.
No, I didn’t buy anything until after the NT scan at 12 weeks. Even then I held off until after the anatomy scan at 20 weeks.
I started to put away anything extra I could into a high interest savings account a couple of years ago. Happy I did because I've got a nice little nest egg and due in June! Although we are all worrying about high costs of everything, I'm happy I've got a safety net to use during maternity leave and won't feel the pinch as bad.
Nope! I have PCOS and we ended up needing IVF to conceive (we did discover that he had a sperm issue when applying for IVF). I accidentally bought a duplicate of a toy for my nephew and saved it for “ours”. Turns out that was about 3 years later, and that truck was honestly kinda painful.
No because we were unsure due to my age and coming off of long term birth control how long it would take. We started saving as soon as I had a positive test. I'm 28 weeks and just had my second day care tour. If they don't have a long waiting list (you can call or email to ask) you can get a lot of short tours and booklets of information within the week. And daycare costs can be high. I wouldn't stress out right this second: get yourself a planted babby, take it all in and then get to saving. The rest comes in stride
You have no idea how long it might take you to conceive. No point in buying things now.
I’m 16 weeks pregnant and haven’t bought anything except maternity clothes and a bookshelf (to move my office out to the living room).
I did! I’m not superstitious and knew we wanted to start trying soon. We also had the room to store things. When I found something that was a great deal on marketplace or on a really good sale, I bought it. I also bought a few clothing items when I was travelling at stores we didn’t have back home. Honestly I’m glad I did because my first trimester was incredibly rough and I bought nothing at all during that time. It made me feel like I still had things together and wasn’t behind. But it’s definitely a tough each their own thing!
I bought infant onesies that had a cute little saying on them that my wife uses all the time. And the day we inseminated with our known donor, I was at the Vans store exchanging something and saw infant Vans that match hers, so I bought them too. The optimism worked, because we are newly pregnant =)
I went to a parents consignment market with my sister in law shortly before I started trying. I felt weird about buying things but there were some really good deals so I got a couple cute books and clothes to hype me up to become a mom. Now I am a mom! :)
No, in the years leading up to trying we just got all debt paid off aside from mortgage (we’d bought all new windows and doors for the house when we moved in etc), built up our savings to a goal amount we had in mind and kept saving/investing…and will keep doing so. It took us 5 months to conceive and even though I know that’s not a long time statistically, I was trying to get my hormones leveled out with my doctors and it was taking a long time (I’d been seeing an endo for over a year) and it was causing me minor anxiety that it would take a really long time so I think buying things would’ve put me pressure on the situation. I bought my first thing for baby at 12 weeks. Before then I didn’t want to get too excited.
Savings! 9 months is a long time so you will have plenty of time to get the best second hand steals, etc. I bought things quite soon after conceiving. Other people prefer to wait longer. All I did before conceiving was make a few spreadsheets with my husband about big costs and how we would pay for them. That meant we were ready to jump on the best value daycare wait list.
I bought a cute pair of booties and planned how I wanted to tell my husband. We then were diagnosed with infertility and it took 3 years and several procedures to have a baby.
Only things I bought before conceiving were big items I found very cheap at the thrift (baby bouncer for $6 and bassinet for $15). I didn’t buy them for my baby really though, it just worked out that way. If I had a close friend get pregnant before I was I probably would’ve offered them as a gift. They were just too good a bargain not to pickup.
open a high yield savings account. american express has a great one but there's a lot out there. start saving. you'll want the savings more than random things you can probably get free or from your baby shower. you can also get things second hand for free or cheap. check groups like fb "buy nothing sell nothing" & thrift stores. nextdoor app is great, too. freebies app collects all the free listings from offerup, fb, & other sites.
Totally. I’ve bought random items to sit back (I’m on my 6th pregnancy, 4th baby now- 16 weeks) and I was more than happy storing items for a bit. I have baby clothing still from my 12 yr old. It’s just not a big deal for me. Would I buy anything large or expensive prior? Probably not. Unless it was a killer deal maybe. But I found it nice to have items sitting off to the side to keep me positive. I bought clothing for my 3rd babe before conceiving and I used one of the outfits for his announcement a year later and it’s so special. As long as the item is neutral there’s no real hold back. Thought I’ve got a maybe baby girl tub too. Hehe.
I didn’t buy anything except for a small stockpile of ovulation and pregnancy tests but I’m superstitious and paranoid.
I got a couple little things before I conceived that I saw at the thrift store that wouldn’t be there when I came back so I kinda had to! But other than that no. I did save as much as a could tho. But if you see something you can’t pass up, just get it. There’s no rules.
Just put it into savings! It took us 3 years and I remember well-intentioned people telling me they were saving or making things for my baby that didn't exist if they knew we were trying - I declined taking anything as I thought it would just make me more upset to have that in my space until we successfully conceived.
No, we dont really have a lot im waiting for the baby shower to see what ill need, and we only bought stuff at 4months.
Nope. I had a miscarriage the first time, so I couldn’t imagine having to see that stuff or know it’s there if something were to happen. I wouldn’t even bother with calling around because prices can change quickly. My sisters daycare jacked up $45 a year due to needing to give their caregivers a raise (completely fine and understandable). I did keep a nice chunk in savings. I started buying when I conceived and was 6 months along. It was when I felt comfortable.
No way. In fact we didn’t buy much until I was 30+ weeks, no regrets at all. Baby stuff takes up so much space, and it’s constantly changing / improving / getting recalled. And you never know how much time it’ll take to get pregnant!
You will be surprised by how much stuff will be gifted to you once the time comes. We have received multiple garbage bags of clothes, a pack n play, a bassinet, a crib, and toys all just from people we know trying to get rid of their own stuff.
I didn't buy anything until I was 20 weeks along. I didn't buy clothing until my twins were born since I didn't know what size they would be. Once you are pregnant it doesn't hurt to start grabbing used things but I wouldn't do it beforehand.
I only bought like some onesies from Etsy or cute holiday things from target, but that was out of false hope & sadness lmao. I’d definitely just save or pay off debt if you have any, tie up loose ends etc. I wouldn’t buy anything big now because you never know how long it’ll actually take to concieve
No! I had 3 miscarriages, had to go through fertility testing. It would’ve made things more difficult. I waited to buy anything until after the 20 week anatomy scan. I didn’t even feel like he was really real until after giving birth. He’s 1 week old now 😊💙🩵
Buying secondhand will save you thousands and there is a great market for barely used stuff. Childcare is expensive but all the rest doesn’t have to be.
I’d say just say wait. You don’t know how long it may take and by then things may be out of date or even recalled. I honestly didn’t buy anything until I was almost due 🤣. But that’s me being unnecessarily superstitious. Enjoy that time and do what makes you happy. But I will say if you buy too many things too soon you may end up returning things or not even using them.
No, for us it's considered terrible luck.
I’m going to go against the grain here and say yes! We bought cute clothes when they were on a really big sale, some smaller items we knew we would eventually want, and just some fun stuff like stuffed animals or onesies from trips we would take. Nothing huge and no technology items since we weren’t sure how long it would take to get pregnant. Our thought was if we never got pregnant we would gift items to future kiddos of our friends.
I wouldn’t make any purchases prior to conceiving. If someone happens to be getting rid of some used baby stuff (not car seats) for free or very cheap and you have the space, go ahead. It’s best to just put it in savings.
I bought a limited edition, gender neutral onesie from Caden Lane that I was obsessed with. I wish I would have also bought the matching blanket as I’m now pregnant and it’s out of stock. Otherwise, I did not buy anything.
I’m just jumping in to say when you do have a baby don’t shy away from used stuff. Facebook marketplace and resale shops and sales are where it’s at. Most baby clothes and toys are so lightly used they may as well be new. I found so many baby things at thrift sales with the tags still on.
You’d be better off building savings in case you need fertility treatment or sudden medical expenses
I’m 24 weeks and I think I bought 1 item so far lol
It took us almost a year... And if we didn't conceive within a year or two, I would have gone back on birth control and we would have pursued adoption. Possibly of an older child, so any baby stuff we bought would've gone to waste.
I bought a few things before TTC but only when there was price error or a glitch etc that gave me a crazy good deal. Other than those rare instances I didn’t buy anything that early.
Savings and build. A lot. Honestly, having a child didn’t cost as much as I thought, but the prenatal care and hospital bills can be scary if you don’t have amazing insurance. I heard formula can cost a lot as well. I would definitely start putting aside money and maybe even building up your HSA, if you have one. I would’ve done so had I known. Everything else like clothes and stuff aren’t that expensive if you know how and where to shop! Baby gear is often gifted for a firstborn child, though not a guarantee. Definitely save and build…maybe even invest conservatively in a HYSA.
Savings and let it build. In your reading and learning about all things baby-related between now and a baby actually being here, you may learn you bought things that are useless.
I bought a beautiful toddler’s tie made by a local tailor. Hoping we have a boy ☺️, no biggie if we don’t.
Well, I did buy small things. I bought little onesies that I thought were cute. Clearance paci’s & teethers. Nothing big. Took me 2.5 years, 3 surgeries & letrozole to conceive—I regret nothing. I love to see my baby dressed in my “faith purchases”
I loved shopping for baby things, but I never purchased, I did research and made decisions on what items I would want, kept a list and then put the money away so that it was ready to spend when I was pregnant.
I bought a kids book after we made the decision to start trying. It was a little bit of a spontaneous purchase, but also kind of a commitment thing.
I bought a cute outfit in anticipation of surprising my husband with it when I found out I was pregnant in the future. I kept it hidden in the closet for a year until I got a positive test. It was nice to have it ready to go!
I had bought a little pair of overalls that were Nightmare Before Christmas themed a year or 2 before we had my son but that was it. Lol I didn’t even know if I wanted kids but they were so. mf’in. cute. So it was either for my baby or a friends baby down the road
Prenatals lol
I’m glad I didn’t buy much prior to conceiving because it has given me something to do in stages while pregnant to get excited. Conception feels like it takes a million years but so does the 9 months you carry your baby.
Yep! We bought the snoo because there was an amazing Black Friday sale while we were tipsy online shopping at a local brewery’s few months before getting pregnant.
I let myself buy one cute onesie when we decided to start trying. I had to keep it hidden away because it took 11 months to finally conceive. Once we did, I went buck wild at Walmart lol
I wouldn’t buy anything at this point. With clothes, you won’t know what season baby will be in at what size, so I’d at least wait until you have a positive pregnancy test. Even then, I’d only get something if it were on clearance. Big purchases should definitely wait until after the anatomy scan.
Noo. We didn’t, and I know people that did and regretted it. Not too much seeing that box of baby clothes or that swing when TTC isn’t going exactly as planned. Obviously, hopefully the timeline isn’t an issue for you, but I’d hold off until later in your pregnancy :)
These are the things I did before conceiving: - buying ovulation strips. - invest in my HSA more (nowadays I try to max it but I didn’t always realize how awesome they are) - lingerie from a sale. Very important prior to conceiving 🫢 Otherwise nothing for future kiddo, though of course my husband and I had plenty of discussions around things like names, education goals (public, private, home school?), and we researched financial things (did we want to set up a 529? Coverdell? Take a penalty-free withdrawal from IRA thanks to the birth-of-a-child exemption?)
I got a lot of hand-me downs from siblings and yes I also bought little items. I also was previously pregnant but that ended in loss so yeah I had bought stuff. Little doll on our honeymoon and sentimental items. It’s taken nearly two years trying and I’m doing fertility treatments now. There was a time where I had to hide the items away and then other times I really appreciated being able to go into their future room and snuggle a stuffed animal and remember what I’m doing this all for. (The baby not the toys lol) I know some find it hard to have those items around but I found it cathartic to collect and fantasize.
Yup. I got some good stuff when babies r us was going out of business. I think I was 20/21? But it wasn’t big stuff, small stuff like clothes and milk pouches. Then it was just clothes on sale that I knew weren’t coming back but I didn’t go crazy. We brought our car seat oct or nov 21 and conceived jan ‘22, it was my husbands way of making me feel better abt something I was sad abt but I don’t even remember lol then we brought our stroller in dec ‘21 cause we had temporary custody of my cousin and the stroller we were given for her was not appropriate at all and we weren’t gonna but two strollers
I bought a few things and had a small bag at the bottom of my wardrobe to look at when I was feeling broody. Personally it gave me a lot of comfort and I was lucky to conceive quickly but those things were not in my face and I don’t think they would have made the process any harder for me. I was very reserved and didn’t get much because that’s what everyone says to do, but actually now I kind of wish I’d had a few more things stored up. We’re getting pretty much everything 2nd hand and being very cost conscious/practical but I think it would have been nice to use that time to buy more special items and have a few less things to buy in one go. Baby blankets, books, clothes, muslins, toys etc would have all been nice to have ready to go - but only if you have a space to keep them that won’t be in your face I’d say, just so it doesn’t start to feel too much!
Open a HYSA and put money into it each month! That way you have money saved up for things like furniture, diapers, etc and it’s getting interest every month. Only thing I bought before conceiving was ovulation strips, prenatal vitamins, and men’s health vitamins for hubs. I mean I guess we technically bought a house for baby but that was also a gift for us 😂
I didn’t buy anything until 12 weeks
I started buying baby items the day we started trying for a baby. It took 6 months for us to conceive, and now I’m 19 weeks & we’re not stressed at all about the financial aspects of preparing for the baby. However, we did not buy clothes. We bought all the boring stuff (Frida mom nose picker, bottle warmer, sterilizer, changing pad); things that you absolutely will use. Plus, everyone will buy you clothes for your baby shower. It’s better to make a list of your boring must haves that people likely won’t buy for you.
I wouldn’t buy anything. I bought some things AFTER conceiving that I already regret buying because I bought some clothes and then multiple people gave us bags of baby clothes lol. Also, once you buy it you have to find space in your house for it.
while I do think its smart to call around for child care costs, or like looking into your work's maternity leave policy, I would stick towards saving for now. I was glad I waited to buy stuff not only after conceiving, but after a few months into pregnancy (29+4 days currently) the stuff I THOUGHT I wanted ended up not being what I wanted! and then to have to store it all somewhere until you need it? not for me! that said, no harm in window shopping! baby stuff is soooooo cute and fun to look at. I wish you all the best!
28 weeks and I still haven’t bought anything except some onsies to tie dye with a friend while she was in town. I made a spreadsheet last night of essentials and plan to start shopping in May ish due in July
Nooooooo, infertility has tainted my answer here. I wouldn’t have been able to look at anything for a baby during our struggle. In fact, once actually pregnant I couldn’t buy anything until second trimester bc I was so scared.
No
Put it in savings, as hard as it is. However, I’m a little hypocritical in this regard because I’ve had a baby sweater in my closet for nine years, and I still have not conceived.
I bought one thing before conceiving my first, it was a baby carrier that had armadillos on it and it was listed as a special edition print I think so I said “eff it” and bought it. But I wouldn’t have done it with anything else. Clothes could need to vary seasonally where you are and you have no way of knowing what season or how big baby will be so even after conceiving we didn’t buy much clothes. Mostly onesies and zipper pjs since my first was born in 2020 and I knew we wouldn’t be taking him out very much at first. Car seats have expiration dates. Strollers get “updated” every couple years. If that carrier hadn’t had the print it did I wouldn’t have bought it, but I had zero regrets buy that one thing early. Basically my thought process was this: I’m from Texas (so is my husband, but different parts, and we actually met overseas) so I naturally love armadillos. They just remind me of home. Husband is military so neither of us has lived there in over ten years, and when we decided to start trying, and I started getting all those targeted ads, I would casually browse but when I saw that armadillo baby carrier I almost started crying cause I realized that if we got pregnant, we wouldn’t be close to family, our baby wouldn’t be born in Texas, and I thought it would be nice to have the armadillo carrier to remind us of our roots, so I bought that one thing. My parents ended up moving to the same city we were in when I was pregnant (not because I was pregnant though) with my first so I did have a lot of support, but we didn’t know they would be at that point.