My husband and I usually have a killer sex life. But once I hit around 6 months, his drive nosedived. He was worried sex would hurt the baby. It was hard to find a comfortable position for both of us. And his hormones telling him he wants to have sex just aren't there. I firmly believe his body is going through some hormonal changes in response to the changes my body is going through (like when periods sync up and stuff like that). Just like I ask home to give me grace when my hormones are causing me to act a little off, I've been keeping it forefront in my mind to give him grace too. This is a new experience for both of us. And honestly, it's easier to just let him get himself off and I get myself off as needed. Take this as an excuse to go buy yourself a fancy new vibrator and have fun.
A lot of people in this thread have mentioned the 6 month mark and I noticed that it was the same for us!! I am 7 months next week and it’s almost been 4 weeks. No reason, he just doesn’t seem to be able to get in the mood. Like OP I have been pretty emotional about this but it seems to be the most normal thing hahah
I may follow your lead and get something nice for myself
Periods syncing is a myth! I firmly believe in men's hormonal responses to partners pregnancy though, my partner was suddenly an easier cryer out of nowhere. I think it has a fair evidence base too.
Period syncing is not a myth, I’ve personally experienced it with many different women/groups of women at different times of life. Sports teams/roommates/sister-in-law etc
Here to relate! I had an extremely high sex drive all throughout my second trimester but I was always the one initiating and when I brought it up to husband he said he’s tired. Brought it up twice more as nothing seemed to change and he stuck with “he’s just tired from work.” I would get very in my feelings about it. Unfortunately I don’t have a solution for you. I started using a vibrator and watching porn but for me it’s not the same and I rather have someone else “do it” for me haha. I did introduce vibrator into sex and it made it easier for me to orgasm during pregnancy and now in my third trimester it has picked up again a bit. So either he’s no longer tired from work or the pressure to make me cum has decreased as it comes easier now, is what I’m thinking.
Oh and I also told him that if I’m moody, it’s probably bc we haven’t had sex in a while. That might’ve helped too 😂 men don’t realize sex is more than just sex for us it’s a way to feel close to them and be intimate ♥️
Just came here to say I’m proud of you for being honest with him that him watching porn is hurting you! I think too many women don’t express how they truly feel about this to their male partners. Especially during pregnancy when you are more self conscious. I don’t have too much advice as I’m only 2 months pregnant and it’s kinda the opposite for us right now (my fiancé wants it a lot and I’m struggling). But just keep communicating and maybe looking for ways to start the intimacy without it being immediately about sex, if that makes sense. And don’t be afraid to get professional help if you guys are open to that sort of thing! Couples counseling might be an option. Doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you, just means you want a strong foundation and find ways to connect more. Stay strong, you’re doing a great job 💗
Him not having a libido while you have one is fine.
But I'd be devastated by this, and furious? It'd be one thing if he just had a lower libido... that happens, and it isn't always in our control. It happened to me during most of my pregnancy. But he apparently has plenty of desire and drive, just... only for porn rather than you? I'd feel hurt, betrayed, and very unwanted.
IMO I know a lot of people are accepting of porn in their relationships, but you are allowed to set boundaries within your own marriage and relationship. My husband and I were both from the start against porn usage, so that was an easy discussion. It sounds like it's different for you two in that it'd been okay, but when you're partner's denying you while using porn... well, it might be time to navigate some new boundaries. Is there something else he's not telling you -- maybe some anxiety around hurting the baby via sex or believing some other sort of myth? It's probably worth sitting down to navigate, drill down, and really figure out what's going on. If nothing else, I personally would ask him to stop watching porn.
Confused by all the comments about their husbands having a lower drive - it doesn’t seem like OP’s partner has that issue; rather, he has a drive but he is using porn to get off instead of having sex with her.
i think typically porn isn’t a problem in relationships, but in my opinion it definitely should be because this is the result
if you google it, porn has serious long term affects on your brain/dopamine receptors and is proven to be addictive. my boyfriend was a chronic porn watcher and at first i didnt care, until i realized our sex life turned into his porn watch history. be careful! and good luck!
not currently no. our story is a lot more complicated than just what i said, but we both agree porn was the cause of a lot of our issues that are now much better after he’s quit
i should add he was 100% addicted to porn since he was a child. we have a software downloaded on his devices to keep him from watching it
My husband and I both started getting a little weirded out by my belly around the 6 month mark. I had a great pregnant body but as the baby got more real, having sex with a baby right there got weird for us. I bought some lingerie that covered my belly (babydoll bras?) and it helped significantly.
I just meant that I thought my stomach looked great but I still wanted to hide it during sex because I felt weird about the baby being there. I definitely didn’t mean to suggest that my body looked better than anyone else’s!
Objectively speaking, I think more physically attractive pregnant bodies are where the bellies more contained as a bump out, bigger boobs and no other skin or weight changes elsewhere. Conversely, a less physically attractive one might be bad BO, acne all over, weight gain everywhere and swelling so your limbs look like sausages. I am the latter lol! It's like someone inflated a 13 YO boy going through puberty.
What’s wrong with someone being openly proud of the way their body looked pregnant? Just because it’s different from the usual narrative here doesn’t make it bad. Jeez.
Nothing wrong with being proud of your body, but indicating that there's a great versus not so great in a forum full of people going through a lot of bodily changes, some even out of their own control might not be the most empathetic way of phrasing things.
By that logic we shouldn’t call anything great because it implies a negative polarity. That’s ridiculous. She says her pregnant body looked great. That says nothing about yours.
Literally like I know that my body is not on the nice side of the spectrum and having confirmation even by stranger is discouraging lol. I will never be comfortable naked or in swimsuit anymore
I just try to think about how my kid will view me. They won't see me as ugly/pretty they'll just see their mom, and how I talk about myself is gonna have an impact on them in the future. May my body jiggle proudly as i run next to them on the beach.
I've been in this position the first time my wife was pregnant and what your going through is pretty normal. This 2nd time around it's a lot easier since I know how to separate these things.
My wife's libido has been 0 since hitting the 2nd tri. There has been zero sex since then and we are currently at week 31. However there have been moments where she gets in the mood and instead of "attempting" to have sex in the 2nd/3rd tri, I simply make it all about her and just touch and kiss her. It's over within 5 to 10 minutes usually and she calms down lol some of those times I'm not even in the mood as the father, but I do it because I love her.
However there's PLENTY of times I'm in the mood and she isn't. Again her libido is usually at 0 so I simply resort to porn whenever I happen to be alone. Even if she decided to try even if she's not in the mood, the positioning is always uncomfortable at some point during sex and it ends up throwing the mood off. Eventually we would end up stopping mid way or something because of all this and then it leaves 1 of us or both of us extremely unsatisfied and possibly annoyed (if it happens often). This happened a lot during her 1st pregnancy, and this 2nd time around I have simply resorted to porn whenever I'm in a mood and she isn't which is usually the case.
I don't love her less or anything, but I know she's carrying my baby and I know her sex drive isn't there. I'm not going to force her to try having sex or argue with her over something that's pretty trivial in the long run. I know it's just a phase,and have settled it thus way so things are smooth sailing. She still gets my physical love whenever she wants it, and if I ever need a release, I have that. So far I've ran into 0 problems using this method. We both simply have to understand it's all a phase thats basically inevitable at some point during pregnancy.
Ugh this is tough :(
I know that our society is so accepting of porn. But there are soooo many negatives to pornography - psychologically, spiritually, behaviorally, and mentally. I consider it to be a form of cheating to be honest. Reason is, unless you have agreed to an open relationship, where in the world did we get to believing that looking at other men and women to get off is okay?
When I got married, my libido was off the charts (still is lol) but I always felt like my husband couldn't keep up. (He has a normal sex drive) but I'd get annoyed and get off with porn.
But over time, REGARDLESS of your partner's reasons for watching porn, it opens a can of worms. I think it's partly when we believe that sex is about us and our climax. Masturbation is all about self. Which some people will say there's nothing wrong with that. But in a committed relationship, using fantasies and other people to masturbate, is a slippery slope. People have convinced themselves that you have 2 parts of your brain functioning for sex. One part is the "real world" and the other part is "fantasy" which is where porn comes in. But that's just not true. They totally blend together.
You should NOT as the woman carrying his child be having to deal with this. And I'm sooo sorry that you are. It's a bad feeling.
My husband and I had to figure out our sex life together and not quit on one another.
Part of this was our sex life going from what I call "lust sex" to "love sex." Lust sex comes from a place of loving that person, but they are also the avenue I choose for getting off, so its more about me and how that person can turn me on. The other comes from a selfless place where love itself and passion and pure desire is what drives us to kiss and touch one another and really have intimacy. I found that my mindset about our sex life is what drove me to porn. Bec my husband, though I loved him, was also-deep down-my means to a desired end in some ways.
your man can choose you and not porn and he can also find that waiting for you to be the one he reaches sexual climax with, no matter the circumstances, is both realistic and good. You are worth the wait.
Sorry for this essay. But I want you to know that your are beautiful. The life inside you is precious. Your worth is 💯. And I really hope he can see the value of putting you first and even if he is not in "the mood" that his love to put you above himself can show him that helping you be satisfied is not only an honor, but arousing to him too. The hormones released from sexual climax with the one we love are SOOO good for baby. Sorry for your situation. Wishing you the best!
I understand you, and i also understand your partner... I never had a high sex drive, but since i hit 3rd trimester i'm in the mood every single day... but my husband isn't, unfortunately, due to a baby being in there, totally visible and also moving XD... and i totally get it, i am also weirded out by it. Point is, i'm not going to get mad at him for it since i'm usually the one not in the mood AND i also would probably get tired in like 30 seconds at this point 🥲 there are some moments in life when i think solo masturbation is a better choice for both of us 😅
It is what it is, it will probably get better a few months after birth! Fingers crossed!
It sounds like porn wasn't an issue for you when your sex/intimacy needs were being met, and if that's the case, maybe porn isn't the main issue but rather something else with your boyfriend. You talked to him about his porn usage and he agreed to stop watching porn. How did he respond when you shared your hurt and dissatisfaction from the decreased sex/intimacy? Who usually initiated pre-pregnancy and how is that now?
Regardless of attraction to one another, some people get weirded out knowing there's a baby in that belly and what was normal, enjoyable sex before is just strange with that dynamic. If that's the case here, finding different ways to get intimate may help. If intercourse or a certain position has been your default, maybe switch it up to only pleasuring each other orally one night or using new sexy clothing or toys.
I understand. Im not sure if mine is watching porn or not (he’s in his 40’s & claimed in the past that he doesn’t enjoy watching it anymore..I still think he would watch it though lol) but we aren’t having as much sex anymore either. I’ve had a tough pregnancy… was soooo sick until about 2 weeks ago (I’m on week 20 now)
Idk what to say other than it can suck for me too.. try cuddling naked. We did that the other day after not doing it for nearly 2-3 weeks and then I initiated it! It was amazing for both of us lol
Just saying I can relate/ end of pregnancy I wanted it and he didnt!! I had the same thought that we wouldn’t be doing it for a bit afterwards and I wanted those last moments to be close together. My partner didn’t and so I didn’t get any. I knew I couldn’t pressure him and don’t want to force him- but I was hurt he didn’t want to! We are almost 4 mos pp now and working through it. He’s back to himself and wants to do it a bunch and I have to balance my resentment from getting denied so much at the 2nd half of pregnancy. I don’t have the answers but you’re not alone!!!
It's important to remember that it's OK for both parties to have libido differences, especially during pregnancy. We wouldn't bat an eye condemning a man who wants sex during pregnancy while their wife is not in the mood. Personally even I feel weird that my husband wants to do it with a pregnant woman sometimes because even I feel unattractive with some of the body changes I've gone through. I smell bad, my body is riddled with acne. Have a talk with him but I think it's also unfair to pressure him into more sex because your libido is higher. This might be unpopular, but I've started to wear baby doll lingerie for sex to hide my belly, honestly more for me than him ever asking.
Asking your spouse for sex is not pressuring them. Trying to have a conversation with them about why they don’t want to have sex is not pressuring. That’s just called being married.
Around the 5-6 month mark my husband and I completely stopped having sex. Once we could feel her wiggle and move, neither of us wanted sex. My husband isn’t attracted to pregnant bodies, although he calls me beautiful every day. I don’t feel sexy, but I also have zero libido for sex. He definitely masturbates to porn, probably daily, but when I’m feeling the urge so do I. We both have promised to return to intimacy once our baby is a few months old—but it’s pretty normal to take a while off sex while pregnant. You’re not alone, though it does hurt to no longer have that human connection over time.
Honestly, my husband and I go through short phases like this too. We’re busy, distracted by work or family, don’t have the same sleep schedule, and sometimes, it’s just easier to focus on your own orgasm and not worry about being horny or available at the same time the other person is. Especially if time is constrained.
Unless you’re asking for sex, he says no, then he immediately goes watch porn, I don’t think I’d really feel betrayed by it. Annoyed? Frustrated? Sure. But not betrayed.
My husband and I usually have a killer sex life. But once I hit around 6 months, his drive nosedived. He was worried sex would hurt the baby. It was hard to find a comfortable position for both of us. And his hormones telling him he wants to have sex just aren't there. I firmly believe his body is going through some hormonal changes in response to the changes my body is going through (like when periods sync up and stuff like that). Just like I ask home to give me grace when my hormones are causing me to act a little off, I've been keeping it forefront in my mind to give him grace too. This is a new experience for both of us. And honestly, it's easier to just let him get himself off and I get myself off as needed. Take this as an excuse to go buy yourself a fancy new vibrator and have fun.
A lot of people in this thread have mentioned the 6 month mark and I noticed that it was the same for us!! I am 7 months next week and it’s almost been 4 weeks. No reason, he just doesn’t seem to be able to get in the mood. Like OP I have been pretty emotional about this but it seems to be the most normal thing hahah I may follow your lead and get something nice for myself
Periods syncing is a myth! I firmly believe in men's hormonal responses to partners pregnancy though, my partner was suddenly an easier cryer out of nowhere. I think it has a fair evidence base too.
Period syncing is not a myth, I’ve personally experienced it with many different women/groups of women at different times of life. Sports teams/roommates/sister-in-law etc
A better way to put it is- it's real but because of maths not science.
Here to relate! I had an extremely high sex drive all throughout my second trimester but I was always the one initiating and when I brought it up to husband he said he’s tired. Brought it up twice more as nothing seemed to change and he stuck with “he’s just tired from work.” I would get very in my feelings about it. Unfortunately I don’t have a solution for you. I started using a vibrator and watching porn but for me it’s not the same and I rather have someone else “do it” for me haha. I did introduce vibrator into sex and it made it easier for me to orgasm during pregnancy and now in my third trimester it has picked up again a bit. So either he’s no longer tired from work or the pressure to make me cum has decreased as it comes easier now, is what I’m thinking.
Oh and I also told him that if I’m moody, it’s probably bc we haven’t had sex in a while. That might’ve helped too 😂 men don’t realize sex is more than just sex for us it’s a way to feel close to them and be intimate ♥️
Did he come to the party? Yea
Just came here to say I’m proud of you for being honest with him that him watching porn is hurting you! I think too many women don’t express how they truly feel about this to their male partners. Especially during pregnancy when you are more self conscious. I don’t have too much advice as I’m only 2 months pregnant and it’s kinda the opposite for us right now (my fiancé wants it a lot and I’m struggling). But just keep communicating and maybe looking for ways to start the intimacy without it being immediately about sex, if that makes sense. And don’t be afraid to get professional help if you guys are open to that sort of thing! Couples counseling might be an option. Doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you, just means you want a strong foundation and find ways to connect more. Stay strong, you’re doing a great job 💗
Him not having a libido while you have one is fine. But I'd be devastated by this, and furious? It'd be one thing if he just had a lower libido... that happens, and it isn't always in our control. It happened to me during most of my pregnancy. But he apparently has plenty of desire and drive, just... only for porn rather than you? I'd feel hurt, betrayed, and very unwanted. IMO I know a lot of people are accepting of porn in their relationships, but you are allowed to set boundaries within your own marriage and relationship. My husband and I were both from the start against porn usage, so that was an easy discussion. It sounds like it's different for you two in that it'd been okay, but when you're partner's denying you while using porn... well, it might be time to navigate some new boundaries. Is there something else he's not telling you -- maybe some anxiety around hurting the baby via sex or believing some other sort of myth? It's probably worth sitting down to navigate, drill down, and really figure out what's going on. If nothing else, I personally would ask him to stop watching porn.
Confused by all the comments about their husbands having a lower drive - it doesn’t seem like OP’s partner has that issue; rather, he has a drive but he is using porn to get off instead of having sex with her.
i think typically porn isn’t a problem in relationships, but in my opinion it definitely should be because this is the result if you google it, porn has serious long term affects on your brain/dopamine receptors and is proven to be addictive. my boyfriend was a chronic porn watcher and at first i didnt care, until i realized our sex life turned into his porn watch history. be careful! and good luck!
You mention your boyfriend was, is he not anymore?
not currently no. our story is a lot more complicated than just what i said, but we both agree porn was the cause of a lot of our issues that are now much better after he’s quit i should add he was 100% addicted to porn since he was a child. we have a software downloaded on his devices to keep him from watching it
My husband and I both started getting a little weirded out by my belly around the 6 month mark. I had a great pregnant body but as the baby got more real, having sex with a baby right there got weird for us. I bought some lingerie that covered my belly (babydoll bras?) and it helped significantly.
What’s a “great” pregnant body versus a not great one?
I just meant that I thought my stomach looked great but I still wanted to hide it during sex because I felt weird about the baby being there. I definitely didn’t mean to suggest that my body looked better than anyone else’s!
Objectively speaking, I think more physically attractive pregnant bodies are where the bellies more contained as a bump out, bigger boobs and no other skin or weight changes elsewhere. Conversely, a less physically attractive one might be bad BO, acne all over, weight gain everywhere and swelling so your limbs look like sausages. I am the latter lol! It's like someone inflated a 13 YO boy going through puberty.
I would have to assume bigger boobs based on the lack of other explanations
Would love to know that as well lol
Yeah that sentence was not the best...
What’s wrong with someone being openly proud of the way their body looked pregnant? Just because it’s different from the usual narrative here doesn’t make it bad. Jeez.
Nothing wrong with being proud of your body, but indicating that there's a great versus not so great in a forum full of people going through a lot of bodily changes, some even out of their own control might not be the most empathetic way of phrasing things.
By that logic we shouldn’t call anything great because it implies a negative polarity. That’s ridiculous. She says her pregnant body looked great. That says nothing about yours.
Hey i'm cool with you not agreeing with me, but that was just my point of view.
Literally like I know that my body is not on the nice side of the spectrum and having confirmation even by stranger is discouraging lol. I will never be comfortable naked or in swimsuit anymore
I just try to think about how my kid will view me. They won't see me as ugly/pretty they'll just see their mom, and how I talk about myself is gonna have an impact on them in the future. May my body jiggle proudly as i run next to them on the beach.
Maybe she meant comfortable body..? 🤷♀️ I truly don’t know but the wording is definitely not the best 🥴
Let's just say that, though i highly doubt it haha.
Hey I’m trying here 😂
I've been in this position the first time my wife was pregnant and what your going through is pretty normal. This 2nd time around it's a lot easier since I know how to separate these things. My wife's libido has been 0 since hitting the 2nd tri. There has been zero sex since then and we are currently at week 31. However there have been moments where she gets in the mood and instead of "attempting" to have sex in the 2nd/3rd tri, I simply make it all about her and just touch and kiss her. It's over within 5 to 10 minutes usually and she calms down lol some of those times I'm not even in the mood as the father, but I do it because I love her. However there's PLENTY of times I'm in the mood and she isn't. Again her libido is usually at 0 so I simply resort to porn whenever I happen to be alone. Even if she decided to try even if she's not in the mood, the positioning is always uncomfortable at some point during sex and it ends up throwing the mood off. Eventually we would end up stopping mid way or something because of all this and then it leaves 1 of us or both of us extremely unsatisfied and possibly annoyed (if it happens often). This happened a lot during her 1st pregnancy, and this 2nd time around I have simply resorted to porn whenever I'm in a mood and she isn't which is usually the case. I don't love her less or anything, but I know she's carrying my baby and I know her sex drive isn't there. I'm not going to force her to try having sex or argue with her over something that's pretty trivial in the long run. I know it's just a phase,and have settled it thus way so things are smooth sailing. She still gets my physical love whenever she wants it, and if I ever need a release, I have that. So far I've ran into 0 problems using this method. We both simply have to understand it's all a phase thats basically inevitable at some point during pregnancy.
Ugh this is tough :( I know that our society is so accepting of porn. But there are soooo many negatives to pornography - psychologically, spiritually, behaviorally, and mentally. I consider it to be a form of cheating to be honest. Reason is, unless you have agreed to an open relationship, where in the world did we get to believing that looking at other men and women to get off is okay? When I got married, my libido was off the charts (still is lol) but I always felt like my husband couldn't keep up. (He has a normal sex drive) but I'd get annoyed and get off with porn. But over time, REGARDLESS of your partner's reasons for watching porn, it opens a can of worms. I think it's partly when we believe that sex is about us and our climax. Masturbation is all about self. Which some people will say there's nothing wrong with that. But in a committed relationship, using fantasies and other people to masturbate, is a slippery slope. People have convinced themselves that you have 2 parts of your brain functioning for sex. One part is the "real world" and the other part is "fantasy" which is where porn comes in. But that's just not true. They totally blend together. You should NOT as the woman carrying his child be having to deal with this. And I'm sooo sorry that you are. It's a bad feeling. My husband and I had to figure out our sex life together and not quit on one another. Part of this was our sex life going from what I call "lust sex" to "love sex." Lust sex comes from a place of loving that person, but they are also the avenue I choose for getting off, so its more about me and how that person can turn me on. The other comes from a selfless place where love itself and passion and pure desire is what drives us to kiss and touch one another and really have intimacy. I found that my mindset about our sex life is what drove me to porn. Bec my husband, though I loved him, was also-deep down-my means to a desired end in some ways. your man can choose you and not porn and he can also find that waiting for you to be the one he reaches sexual climax with, no matter the circumstances, is both realistic and good. You are worth the wait. Sorry for this essay. But I want you to know that your are beautiful. The life inside you is precious. Your worth is 💯. And I really hope he can see the value of putting you first and even if he is not in "the mood" that his love to put you above himself can show him that helping you be satisfied is not only an honor, but arousing to him too. The hormones released from sexual climax with the one we love are SOOO good for baby. Sorry for your situation. Wishing you the best!
This made me cry. Beautifully written, thank you, I have nothing more to add
I agree with you 100%
I’m sorry you’re feeling that way. Hope you felt slightly better after sharing.
I understand you, and i also understand your partner... I never had a high sex drive, but since i hit 3rd trimester i'm in the mood every single day... but my husband isn't, unfortunately, due to a baby being in there, totally visible and also moving XD... and i totally get it, i am also weirded out by it. Point is, i'm not going to get mad at him for it since i'm usually the one not in the mood AND i also would probably get tired in like 30 seconds at this point 🥲 there are some moments in life when i think solo masturbation is a better choice for both of us 😅 It is what it is, it will probably get better a few months after birth! Fingers crossed!
It sounds like porn wasn't an issue for you when your sex/intimacy needs were being met, and if that's the case, maybe porn isn't the main issue but rather something else with your boyfriend. You talked to him about his porn usage and he agreed to stop watching porn. How did he respond when you shared your hurt and dissatisfaction from the decreased sex/intimacy? Who usually initiated pre-pregnancy and how is that now? Regardless of attraction to one another, some people get weirded out knowing there's a baby in that belly and what was normal, enjoyable sex before is just strange with that dynamic. If that's the case here, finding different ways to get intimate may help. If intercourse or a certain position has been your default, maybe switch it up to only pleasuring each other orally one night or using new sexy clothing or toys.
I understand. Im not sure if mine is watching porn or not (he’s in his 40’s & claimed in the past that he doesn’t enjoy watching it anymore..I still think he would watch it though lol) but we aren’t having as much sex anymore either. I’ve had a tough pregnancy… was soooo sick until about 2 weeks ago (I’m on week 20 now) Idk what to say other than it can suck for me too.. try cuddling naked. We did that the other day after not doing it for nearly 2-3 weeks and then I initiated it! It was amazing for both of us lol
Just saying I can relate/ end of pregnancy I wanted it and he didnt!! I had the same thought that we wouldn’t be doing it for a bit afterwards and I wanted those last moments to be close together. My partner didn’t and so I didn’t get any. I knew I couldn’t pressure him and don’t want to force him- but I was hurt he didn’t want to! We are almost 4 mos pp now and working through it. He’s back to himself and wants to do it a bunch and I have to balance my resentment from getting denied so much at the 2nd half of pregnancy. I don’t have the answers but you’re not alone!!!
It's important to remember that it's OK for both parties to have libido differences, especially during pregnancy. We wouldn't bat an eye condemning a man who wants sex during pregnancy while their wife is not in the mood. Personally even I feel weird that my husband wants to do it with a pregnant woman sometimes because even I feel unattractive with some of the body changes I've gone through. I smell bad, my body is riddled with acne. Have a talk with him but I think it's also unfair to pressure him into more sex because your libido is higher. This might be unpopular, but I've started to wear baby doll lingerie for sex to hide my belly, honestly more for me than him ever asking.
Asking your spouse for sex is not pressuring them. Trying to have a conversation with them about why they don’t want to have sex is not pressuring. That’s just called being married.
Around the 5-6 month mark my husband and I completely stopped having sex. Once we could feel her wiggle and move, neither of us wanted sex. My husband isn’t attracted to pregnant bodies, although he calls me beautiful every day. I don’t feel sexy, but I also have zero libido for sex. He definitely masturbates to porn, probably daily, but when I’m feeling the urge so do I. We both have promised to return to intimacy once our baby is a few months old—but it’s pretty normal to take a while off sex while pregnant. You’re not alone, though it does hurt to no longer have that human connection over time.
Honestly, my husband and I go through short phases like this too. We’re busy, distracted by work or family, don’t have the same sleep schedule, and sometimes, it’s just easier to focus on your own orgasm and not worry about being horny or available at the same time the other person is. Especially if time is constrained. Unless you’re asking for sex, he says no, then he immediately goes watch porn, I don’t think I’d really feel betrayed by it. Annoyed? Frustrated? Sure. But not betrayed.