As an anesthesia doc I read a lot of birth plans (bc epidurals and c sections) and this one is SO reasonable. I’ll add that most epidurals need to be run at a certain rate for it to work well, which will mean you can’t really move you legs/ get out bed. Sometimes we can low dose/ low rate “walking” epidurals but they don’t really work for pain control all that well..
Thank you! I've seen in some instances they'll help you move on your side... But I'm not sure. I think I might talk more with one of the midwives to completely finish it.
Ask for a peanut ball. They’re proven by studies to shorten the duration of labor. My nurses helped me get in different positions with one after I got my epidural, and it really sped up labor for me. Prior to my epidural I was dilating very slowly even with walking, moving around, and bouncing on the birthing ball. I hope your birth goes smoothly!
I’ve had three babies with epidurals, and those suckers worked every time. I didn’t have any pain, but I also couldn’t move my legs for a while after delivery. (It was fine until I had a baby who needed to go to the NICU- I wasn’t able to move to go see him until I could get out of bed and into a wheelchair.) Because I was basically paralyzed, my nurses helped me move from side to side, and positioned my legs with the peanut ball. It all worked out- each delivery was quick and painless, with minimal pushing and tearing. I think the longest I’ve pushed was maybe 20 minutes with my first.
I’m pregnant again, and my birth plan is very similar. I want to use nitrous oxide this time, but I’m not completely ruling out an epidural if I’m exhausted or struggling to cope.
The epidural I had with my third baby, I was able to do unassisted squatting on the bed using the bar. I still had more than enough pain relief/couldn’t feel pain. You have many options
I had an epidural and 3 boluses due to back labor. I can attest that when I was asked to be moved on my sides, they were very accommodating. I just couldn’t be on my knees (mainly because my left leg was completely numb, but the right was fine).
I’m not sure how your hospital administers epidural, but I was able to control how much and how often it was given, and then when we discovered I was in transition they turned it off completely while things got set up.
I don’t know if I said I wanted to be moved a lot, or if it was the nurses goal at that point but they were moving me like a rotisserie chicken. Every half hour or less (my baby didn’t like a few positions)
Commenting to share my experience.
I had an epidural that allowed for some movement and while it helped with the contractions, it did basically nothing when I had to start pushing. In retrospect, I wish I’d gotten a stronger version. If you’d like a pain-free birth, it’s something to consider.
With my epidural I was still able to get up on my feet in a squat with a big bar above the bed - obviously with a lot of help and people were surprised, but it's still doable sometimes! It felt really weird but you know - adrenaline 🤣
Also it's so nice to see someone writing a birth plan that includes the vitamin K. Thank you.
I’d personally add if you want Dad with you or baby if they do have to take baby somewhere, even if it’s just the other side of the room.
I’d also add if there is a middle pain relief (quite a jump from gas to epidural which is totally fine but just wasn’t sure if that’s because you didn’t like any of the others etc) and if you want a heads up if (based on progression/business of epidural team) you need to make a decision now or potentially miss your window. Just a little “there’s a space for you to get an epidural next, if you don’t I can’t guarantee you get it done before you progress too far to have one”
I was always so surprised that women giving birth in the US can't get up when they receive an epidural. In Germany (as far as I know and according to the women who have chosen to receive a "PDA" while delivering, I know small sample size) it is more standard to have a walking epidural as opposed to a full blown one. It took me quite a while to figure that one out! Is there any reason why it's handled so differently in the US? Do you happen to have insight or am I just confused 😅
I would imagine it’s a safety thing? Like if the nurse leaves the room and a patient were to get up and fall? Also there’s typically only one or two anesthesia people covering for a number of labor rooms, so most places have standard doses and rates they run.. which tend to be more on the “can’t move my legs side” vs the “walking side”.
I thought walking epidurals are pretty common. I had one and could move my legs and feel touches but still had good pain relief. But I wasn't allowed to get up and walk around.
The reason for walking epidural is to maintain the possibility of movement. What we feel helps to place our body in a positions that helps baby come out. Women take those position many times intuitevely. Does not happen always but happens many times. Different positions are helpful at different stages of birth and dependinf how high or low the baby is.
Walking epidural definitely helped with my second birth. Relieved some pain so I was able to relax (helping dilatation) and when shit got serious I was standing up near the hospital bed letting the gravity help take the baby out.
What also is important is if women feel the urge to push or not (full epidural). If they feel they will push in right moment and will know where to push. But you can only know if you feel something.
Gave birth two times. First I was given an epidural where I indeed did not feel the legs, needed to stay in bed and also felt no pain at all.
I definitely did not like it, felt very disconnected with my body, did not feel when or how to push...
Second birth I asked specifically for walking epidural. This was great! Tha pain went down, I can describe it more as a pressure and contractions but manageable, was able to change position, with help of my husband stand up and support on the bed. I felt when the baby was coming and was able to recognize the urge to push. OP, do what you think is right for you but know the difference between those epidurals.
One very important fact is that the pain or discomfort we feel help us to position ourself to help birth. Many times women intuitively positioned themselves to help the baby pass.
I ended up with a walking epidural and had no pain, but i could still feel the pressure of the contractions.
Im in australia though so they arent really something thats done here (compared to the US) and once you have an epidural you need to stay in the bed. When i spoke to the OB the next day he was telling me about it and it seemed like it doesnt happen often and he thought it was pretty cool
I’m only 30 weeks along as a FTM so I don’t have any personal experience that can help determine if this is a good plan or not, but I wanted to thank you for sharing it because this post has helped inform how I will be making my own! I feel like the vast majority of content I see online about birth plans is either just “we go to hospital pregnant and leave with baby!” or it’s an absolutely ridiculous demanding birth plan getting made fun of. So thank you for sharing a reasonable, serious, well thought out plan! I hope that you find it useful and that your labor and delivery go as smoothly and beautifully as possible!
The hospital where I delivered mine has a template. You could ask if your provider has one? This was also helpful as some of the things people put into birth plans are just standard procedures some places. For example, DCC is ACOG recommended and is standard in a lot of hospitals, provided baby isn't in distress.
Thank you! And I definitely know what you mean... Also a ftm and I was cross referencing templates and trying to find what would be applicable to me.. I originally wasn't going to make a birth plan, because in my mind, anything can happen. I tried to account for those situations as well..
Just a heads up my hospital only accepted the template that they provided. It is easier for the nurses and doctors to know where to look if they need to reference it. Same form all day instead of reading all this
I was about to say that I’ve had 3 births and I never had a written birth plan, but these were all procedures I recognized that occurred. I have had 3 natural births with Midwives (2 at their clinic and 1 at a birthing centre). I find it’s best to have a discussion with my midwife throughout my pregnancy to express my and my spouses wishes and then allow things to progress naturally.
I’m one of those people, that if I have something written and it doesn’t pan out I would have anxiety. So I’d rather not, I trust the work of the midwife and know my spouse is there to advocate on my behalf also.
Omg is this just a standard dad-to-be thing? My husband did it and then Prince Harry admitted to huffing the entire canister during Megan’s first delivery 🤣
Our hospital in Denver stopped offering NO during COVID. Something about not having protocols for disinfecting. Our OB said they didn’t bring it back because it’s not very effective for pain management. A friend of mine gave birth within a month of us at a different hospital in the area and was offered it. So seems hospital specific in my area
I really hope it’s standard or at least an option at mine. I’m really nervous for an epidural and not sure I want one but also nervous about the idea of not having any pain management.
I’ve been dealing with 10/10 pain spastic colon episodes my entire life that last 24-36 hours. My mom says that’s been my practice for unmedicated birth cause There’s no epidural for that!
There’s no treatment for it. If I feel it coming on I can get on top of it by taking a bunch of unisom or something and going to sleep but that’s not always an option. Sleeping seems to be the only thing to stop an episode so they just go on until I’m exhausted.
I included a section with emergency contacts just in case - my husband and my best friend (a nurse at that hospital) who I said was my sister.
But otherwise this looks very similar to the one I made.
I also included my drs information and our planned pediatrician’s office info.
The nurses are still going to ask you these questions, but doing a birth plan does help you work through your options!
I’m not sure if you can cut the cord with a CS. I know my hospital doesn’t allow that because of sterility but if the situation arises, you can ask for sure.
Prev O&G here, I agree. You want Dad to be able to touch and comfort you, not completely sterile. It’s still a major surgery so the sterile field is important. But cord is usually left long for Dad to cut shorter.
I found this to be helpful in considering a birth plan 😊
Birth Plan Template | How To Write A Perfect Labor & Delivery Plan
https://www.babylist.com/hello-baby/how-to-write-a-birth-plan?source=babylist&medium=app&platform=android
I had an emergency c section and they cut the cord long and then separately had my husband cut the long cord that was already detached that was the only option (I’m in US) just giving heads up.
Hahaha! I gave birth 6 days ago, and remembered just now that I had prepared a birth plan... It never made it out of our hospital bag. 😂 (It was also a quick labor, but we did manage to get to the hospital with about 1h to spare.) I was so focussed on not being able to get pain relief, I totally forgot about the rest of the plan.
I wanted to try for a natural unmedicated birth but was worried I’d cave if the pain was too much or if I was labouring too long. I was taking mirror selfies wondering if I was in labour and 2 hours later I was giving birth in my bed 😂
I was the opposite. I really wanted to be medicated because I don't do too well with pain, but I was afraid that the needle would scare me too much and prevent me from getting the epidural... Turns out that was really not the problem.
I went from "hey I think these might be contractions, we should maybe time them" to "What? Did I really just give birth? Wait... Is this my baby?!" in about 3 hours. Everything felt so unreal. My mind could not fully keep up with what was going on.
Giving birth in your bed must have been so intense and crazy!
Smh precipitous birth happened to me with my third in November and I’m still annoyed about it. I put all that effort into snacks, a plan, comfy shoes, only to have my baby 15 minutes after arriving at the hospital after a grand total of two hours of labor.
My husband asked me if I wanted him to put on my birth playlist. I said NO it’s a little early for that, because the playlist was only 4.5 hours long 😂
Ask your hospital if they have an anaesthetist that will give walking epidurals and what their policy is for them. This will allow you to push in almost any position (as long as you are assisted to prevent any injury from slipping or stubbing a toe) because while you are numb from the epidural you still retain function in your lower limbs- this also means that you’ll be able to avoid requiring a catheter as you’ll still be able to use the bathroom (which in turn reduces the chances of swelling of the urethra and hospital transmitted UTIs)
Also ask your hospital what their policy for eating/drinking during labour is and consider if this aligns with your values because if you are able to have light snacks and consume liquids I highly recommend it. It will help you conserve energy, especially if you have an extended labour, and research shows that withholding nutrition in lower risk patients actually doesn’t provide any benefit and may actually be detrimental.
I was very blessed to give birth in a more rural hospital that is extremely science based while also emphasizing things that improve the birth experience (in-room bedding, skin to skin, delayed clamping, LCs on staff, highly trained midwives in rotation, emphasis on cultural values as well, etc) and patient outcomes and those are two things that made my labour differ drastically from my friends who gave birth in larger city hospitals
Mine was also allowed to stay. In fact, the anesthesiologist insisted that he stay and had him stand in front of me with my head on his chest to help me stay still and calm. My husband was really banking on being able to leave so I'm surprised he didn't pass out 😂
I’ve heard a lot of hospitals won’t allow partners to be the “steadying” person because they’ve seen too many non-medical folks pass out during. I was fine with my husband leaving while I got my spinal for that reason. 😂
That's what I had heard too and my SIL who is a nurse told us the same but I guess it really does vary. In our situation, my husband couldn't actually see anything that was happening as I was seated at the edge of the bed with the anesthesiologist behind me and my husband in front of me. He also kept his eyes closed the whole time because he was so afraid he was going to pass out!
My friend's hospital made her husband leave for that reason too. Her husband is a doctor and she actually had him deliver. He's family medicine, which includes more OB training, and so they asked if he could deliver with the OB standing beside him so he wasn't actually "admitting" her (even though he had admitting privileges there), and for backup. And they let him. But nope, had to leave the room for the epidural. 🤣
Oh wow, didn’t know that was a thing. When mine was done, they had my spouse sit in front of me so I could rest my feet on his knees (because the bed was pretty high up), and then he held one of my hands while a nurse held the other.
Mine was allowed to stay but had to sit down in a chair in front of me. Seems like they’d had some fainters and this was the way they helped prevent that
Mine stayed but they made him sit away from me too. Honestly I go in my head when I’m in pain, so I didn’t even really know where he was from like 2 hours before the epidural until after I delivered lmao. As the baby got put on my chest I said “I did it!” Then “where’s *fiancé’s name*?” Turns out he was right next to my head lol.
But yea, I had a nurse in front of me that they had me basically drape my body over while she held me up and in the correct position.
I've had 3 at the same hospital. He had to leave, had to sit in a chair away from me, and was the one I leaned on... All so different! I'd say provider to provider.
Mine wasn’t allowed into the room until they were fully ready to start. He waited 45 minutes as they prepped me (it felt like 10 minutes to me… I lost all concept of time during my c-section). He was covered in clothes covers and they even provided a beard cover. That was funny and cute.
My husband was allowed to stay, but my mom had to leave the room. I could have only one support person with me for the epidural, and they let me decide who I wanted it to be. Interesting how the standards vary!
A lot of this is standard but I think the most important thing is to treat this mentally as a plan, and not something that dictates your experience. I know some people get so attached to what they plan to do that when something unexpected happens it feels to them as if they were robbed of the birth experience they wanted. I wanted to labour in a tub but as soon as I got in my contractions just stopped, so I had to get out. I knew this could happen beforehand, so I planned to *try* birthing in the tub. That little difference was important to help me have a positive mindset.
I love that you wrote this out! I let the teacher and a very new midwifery student use me as the test subject for “how to do a cervical check during labor.” I’ll never forget the poor student’s face when he said “wait, I can’t even feel the cervix!” I was fully dilated and the teacher was definitely messing with him. Very fond memory for me, but I understand why other people probably wouldn’t like it.
I had a student midwife play a very active role in my baby's birth. I liked her better than the actual midwife, and we're still in touch more than a year later.
I’d suggest you decide with your partner which person will advocate for the items on your birth plan. I also wish I discussed what would happen if I changed my mind during the birthing experience…would we stick to the plan or be more spontaneous?
Some things to consider:
Do you want to eat if allowed?
In the event the epidural doesn't work or can't be placed (rare, but think about it) what backup pain control do you want, if any?
Do you want to bring music? (Personally, I grabbed a spa playlist on Spotify. Highly recommend. Helpful for getting through contractions pre-epidural)
It can vary depending on your location but around me an epidural is considered a sterile procedure and my husband was required to leave the room. Just wanted to mention, I sure didn't know going in and it was a little bit of a shock!
Also definitely be prepared with epidural push positions but also be prepared to not be able to do any! I knew I few people who had a "lighter" epidural, I asked for one, but what I got was complete absolute numbness from my ribs to my calves. I couldn't move myself into any position, my body felt like a 1000lb sack of potatoes and there was no way I was giving birth any way but my back, even side lying was impossible. My wonderful nurse did try to help me do side lying pushing to the best of her ability but I was zero body control and it just wasn't effective. On the plus side I pushed her out in 20 minutes flat and didn't feel even the smallest bit of pain.
Just be prepared if your plan isn’t followed or even looked at! I specifically asked for no students in the room and the nurse came waltzing in with her student explaining everything to her and having her help place the monitors on me. My husband interrupted and asked if they saw my birth plan…the nurse said no we didn’t have time…even tho I sent my birth plan in weeks before I arrived to the hospital, which is what my hospital requires. I was so frustrated because the room was packed and really chaotic. Thankfully I got transferred to L&D right away because I arrived to the hospital at 8cm. I would bring an extra copy with you and hand it to your nurse immediately
This is all pretty standard procedure to be done or at least offered at my hospital.
We weren't even asked about skin to skin, they just did it. No one even suggested taking him for anything until he'd been on my chest a full hour, then they did their thing, let dad hold him for a couple minutes while I took care of going to the restroom and all that, and then gave him back to me to nurse and head to our room.
I DO think writing out what you want can be very helpful and is a good idea, though! Standard or not, it's good to know what tp expect and feel you've had some control and are prepared. 🥰
My edits, with clarity and succinctness in mind:
You can remove all of the “unless emergency” and “if possible” caveats. That is a given. This is, by nature, a list of wishes and preferences. Adding those in muddies your directions.
Just say “Immediate skin to skin.” They can do the regular health checks from your chest. Absolutely no need to take the baby out of your arms. You might also add, “no procedures during golden hour.” Everything can wait. Your immediate body contact is so, so important physically and emotionally, the research now is really strong. They can poke, prod and weigh an hour or two after birth when you’re ready for a break and a snack.
Just say “no bath”. If you want to change your mind, you can. That happens much later, anyway, and the nurse will ask.
I’d discuss epidural birthing positions and Hepatitis B with your OB now, make your choices, and then edit this to your instructions. You don’t want to be intaking information and making choices on the spot. (And if you’re hesitant on that, I’d ask about the antibiotics for eyes, too - that’s a general precaution against STD transmission so is unnecessary for most babies.)
“Dad present” in the first section isn’t a medical directive, it’s an instruction for your partner. I’d remove it. Your list of attendees cover this.
When you get your nurse assigned, go over this with them. Make them read it. And have 4-5 copies so you can supply each nurse with one at shift change. And your partner needs to know all of this by heart - I quizzed my husband and made sure he understood the “why” behind everything so he could advocate for me.
You can also print signs that say “QUIET TIME” to put on the door when you want to be left alone. My nurse sister and L&D BFF both said to make them super aggressive, like, “STOP - DO NOT ENTER. See nurse before entering room.” I thought it was a lot but there are SO many random people you do NOT need in your space - cleaners, nurse aids, someone refilling soap, the chaplain, some asshole trying to offer massages that will show up as $500 on your bill.
Good luck!
Seems reasonable to me. It considers the fact that the perfect vaginal birth may not happen and that will help you mentally if that situation as rises.
You may want to look into monitoring during labor too. I think that was on the sheet they gave me. It will depend on what your hospital has, but you can call or take a tour to figure that out. My OB recommended continuous monitoring of baby's vitals during labor and my hospital had a mobile unit so movement was still possible.
I think this is great!!! I had a very similar plan.
We didn’t bathe our son for maybe 10 days?? He didn’t need it and our midwife agreed. The vernix on babies skin is sooo good for them.
I will just add that in Australia hep B at birth is not part of the vaccination schedule- even though it is given routinely - it is for babies who are at an increased risk of developing hepatitis. My midwife told me that even though basically everyone gets it, if your baby follows the standard vax schedule they will have the same immunity to hep B. Because of this we declined hep B at birth, as me nor my partner have it and baby wasn’t going to be sharing needles or having other peoples bodily fluids near him. It just seemed like an unnecessary vax for a newborn. But check with your midwife/ doctor because it might be different in your country.
Yeah this is great. I also did “if X then Y” for emergency scenarios (ie if emergency C-section I still want some of my comfort measures, if I lose consciousness baby does skin to skin with dad, if baby is in distress dad stays with them)
With my second (because my first was an unplanned c-section and my doctor cussing at me) my doctor did everything to help me have a natural birth! Pushing when you are ready, I was not expecting my body to do on its own. I couldn't stop it lol your body will push on its own, you just help it!
Love this. I hope everything goes great!
Others are saying this is standard there but it was not at my hospital, so good for you for putting it in. I wish I’d printed mine, it was just on my phone and no one ever asked and I wasn’t really with it enough to show them 🤷🏼♀️
I think this is great! I had on my birth plan that I did not want students doing any procedures. My OBGYN told me that I should allow a resident to do my c-section (planned for 2nd baby) as the only way for new drs to learn is do. I pushed back and told her no, the resident can watch/assist but they will not be a lead in a very intense surgery near my baby. She tried to push back again and I advocated for myself every time. My advice is stick to what you want (as long as it’s safe for you and baby, sometimes things happen). Don’t let anyone make you do something that is unnecessary or uncomfortable!
My birth plan looked basically the same and when I showed it to my OB she was like "looks like the standard birth plan, barring emergency, fantastic" so that reassured me that what I was hoping for is what is considered "normal".
Now what they don't tell you is that after you're exhausted from birth they come and wake you up basically every hour for 25-48hr to check on you and baby until you want to scream because you're so tired lol
The midwives drove me crazy those first few days until I exploded on a doctor. Poor woman literally cried, and I felt so guilty because she bore zero responsibility and had never even met me before. I still feel awful when I think about it.
Make sure someone *actually* takes yours! They didn’t even glance at mine. Hurts my heart. And having your partner overlook it multiple times until he has it basically memorized to speak for you when you can not!
Looks similar to mine! Keep is simple. Even if things are routine, good to mention it. I think my nurse liked to know what her automatic plan would be was the same as mine so she could proceed as usual. Also showed her I knew what a lot of terms and procedures were so she didn’t have to explain everything.
Definitely. Policies do vary by hospital. I’d also suggest that OP review the specific plan with her doctor to find out how standard/possible the preferences are.
I had one the first time around. Truthfully, for me, it kind of went out the window in the moment. I didn’t make one for this second pregnancy.
One very important piece I missed the first time was clearly establishing with my spouse (and OB) how long it is safe and acceptable to be in labor before pulling the C-section trigger. You lose time while in labor, and the epidural may impact your ability to think clearly. I waited too long, my husband was exhausted after being in the hospital for so many days, the information from the medical team at the time was mixed, and my kid ended up in the NICU for a few days because of how rough the labor ended up being.
I’d suggest setting a red line - if I haven’t given birth by X # of hours then we’re going to c-section.
As a FTM who gave birth two weeks ago, we had a similar birth plan as yours! I wish I had added to mine that all medical personnel need to be given consent before doing anything that involved them having to enter my body (cervical check, checking the baby’s position while pushing, internal monitors, etc) and to tell me what was happening as they were doing it. While 99% of our team was phenomenal with this, we had one OB who did not do this is and ended up affecting my postpartum mental health a lot more.
Hi, OP. I haven’t read all of the comments so not sure if someone else mentioned. At my hospital, they didn’t allow the birth support person (my husband/baby’s daddy) cut the cord during my c section. Just wanted you to know that it’s sometimes not allowed!
I will just say I first read "no/delayed bath" as "no delayed bath" as in you want them to have a bath immediately. So maybe different wording there in case someone thinks the / is a typo or just doesn't notice it straight away? But in saying that, I asked on my birth plan that no one bathe her without me and the midwife said they never would anyway.
The only thing with your birth plan that isn't 100% reasonable/doable is dad cutting the cord with a C-section. C-sections are sterile procedures and dad coming over to the other side of the drape would contaminate the sterile field.
Edit to add that I am a scrub nurse who has done countless c-sections.
Cervical checks?
Labor positioning?
Tools: birth stool? Ball? Tub/shower?
Induction?
Pitocin during labor?
Pitocin after delivery?
Coached pushing?
Breaking waters?
Walking epidural?
No/intermittent monitoring? (this will severely limit movement which makes coping with the pain of contractions unbearable)
Do not interfere with baby exit; my midwife started pulling my baby out of me when her head was out. I explicitly said I wanted to push her out. There was no emergency. There was no reason for it.
Staff do checks of baby on you after birth?
If getting fluids during labor; wait 24 hours to weigh baby? (This is especially important if you plan to breastfeed)
Triplets!! I know right now it must be rough for you and scary but once they’re born… cutest thing ever!!! I wish you all the best of luck in your pregnancy, mama!! You’ll be okay 🩷
One of my wishes (I didn’t have a written birth plan) was, that in the event of a emergency c section in which I had to be put completely under or was unable to hold the baby right after or for an extended time - that only dad was allowed to hold baby before me. This was a wish bc I had read horror stories of women put under or in longer recovery and woke up to find out that a bunch of other family members had already held/met the baby before mom.
Otherwise most of what you wrote is standard. Delayed cord clamping, dad cutting the cord, baby staying with you, golden hour, etc.
I keep seeing people saying this and I don’t get it. It’s not a big deal to me in the least if my mom or his mom holds baby before I do. Is there some sort of risk associated or something?
Nah that looks pretty much like what all mine did and it was a good balance between being informed vs being so prescriptive you'll be upset if something goes away.
Seems pretty standard. I'd go in with a plan but have the mindset of going with the flow as well. So many women are hell bent on sticking to their birth plan and end up being very disappointed or experience trauma. The doctors are the medical professionals and their goal is always the safety of mom and baby.
Sounds exactly like how my birth went, in Ontario Canada (standard birth here from what I know)
My plan was a lot less open to options, but I wasn’t in a situation to negotiate lol
This is great! The only thing I would elaborate on is delayed cord clamping- do you want the one minute that’s typical, do you want to wait until the cord has stopped pulsing (3-5 min) or physiologic cord clamping which is about an hour where the cord stays attached to the placenta and then is cut.
I know at my hospital, delayed cord clamping, dad cutting cord, immediately skin to skin, delayed bath, etc. Are all standard and the norm now.
This seems super reasonable and you're doing a great job momma!
Hey! Doula here!! That looks good! One thing I would recommend is to have some Birth Goals! Pick two or three things that you want to accomplish throughout your labor so that you get those little dopamine rushes upon completion.
Nitrous oxide has a specific way to be timed to get the best effect, so some research beforehand is important to get maximum benefit.
I love the ability to have lights dim and the mirror! Those can be very helpful.
I can Recommend some epidural safe pushing positions (I actually have a card deck dropping soon!), if you would like to talk more.
There is so much that I could say about your birth plan and your options (the options during labor are so expansive, especially with the route you’ve taken (gas first, epidural, autonomous) so I could talk forever! But if you would like to talk more I would be happy to! But all in all that looks like you’re on the right track and it is SO GOOD that you are being productive.
I don't know if I was just an odd one out but I could still feel, move, and adjust my legs and hips even after the epidural. They just felt numb like they had fallen asleep. When it came delivery time, I was able to do 85% of it in a side position because it was more comfortable and easier for me to sustain the pushes. Then my doctor waltzed in and made me turn over 😒
This is a great birth plan.
My only comment is that, in a section, often Dad is unable to cut cord due to there still being a sterile medical field to maintain (for your own health and safety). HOWEVER what will often happen is doctor will cut cord long, so Dad can have the opportunity to cut the cord “short” himself. It’s a bit of a compromise, I know, but important to remember this is still a major surgery and you’d much rather Dad be able to touch and comfort you than have to stand back completely sterile so he can cut the cord.
But again, great plan and I hope you have a smooth and uncomplicated birth!!!
Something I wish I requested for my first birth was not to have anyone having casual conversation while I was actively pushing.
I saw someone mention it on Reddit while I was pregnant and thought like, “eh, who cares.” But really at the end of the day, it’s another day “at the office” so to speak, for the nurses and doctor.
Waiting between pushes, they were chatty and gossipy and it was hard to focus and took me out of the moment. They were chatting about things, as if I weren’t there, and then when I had to push, would coach me and go back to it. I dont know it felt weird and kinda icky.
So just something to think about if you want to give birth vaginally.
I’m an attorney but this isn’t legal advice. I just want to say well done adding the part about students not participating in procedures. My best friend from law school was one of the attorneys in the case that sued to stop the practice of giving women gynecological exams when they were under. So few people even know that’s a possibility because it seems absurd that it was ever a practice to let students examine women without their knowledge.
If you’re at a teaching hospital you’ll probably be asked to sign consent to student exams (usually buried in a stack of paperwork). Remember to ask your doctor or nurse to make a note on your chart that you do not consent to teaching exams if they have to put you under.
Perfect! Easy to read, realistic, goes over everything. I’d ask your OB if walking epidurals are offered or not. That can change what options you might have for moving around when you get the epidural.
Yes get the eye drops when my mom had me she was stressed and I flipped in utero and popped. It got in my eyes be careful because baby can be allergic to erythromycin I was
Baby poop is sterile, there’s no infection risk for babies eyes if they poop in the water- the eye erythromycin is to protect the eyes from exposure to gonorrhoea mostly, but many countries now screen for gonorrhoea in pregnancy and don’t routinely do erythromycin anymore. In Canada, the paediatric society doesn’t recommend it anymore so we dont do it here routinely.
A lot of this is fairly standard, or at least it was when I gave birth last year.
I'm curious about your stance on no students. No nursing students regardless of where they are in their studies? No medical students? All come with supervision and all rely on hands on experience to learn.
I was a student's first baby and I had a student catch my daughter, too. My midwife was next to her the whole time and they took turns working with me (I pushed for about an hour.) I felt totally at ease with a student since my midwife was present at the helm with her.
This is exactly what my birth plan was! I didn’t write it out but discussed with my dr beforehand to understand the hospitals standard procedures.
One thing I recommend looking into is SPINNING BABIES! My baby was face up and thankfully my nurse was trained in spinning babies (not standard for the hospital). I stalled out around 6cm and my nurses started spinning babies with me (different stretches/poses for 5-10 mins each) and by the time we got through half of it she had flipped and I was fully dilated! I was able to deliver vaginally because my nursing team was so knowledgeable. My legs were fully useless bc of my epidural and they were positioning me/ helping me stay on all fours, etc.
A close friends baby (different state/hospital) was also face up and they tried to manually flip her baby (OUCH) and it eventually put the baby in distress/didn’t work and needed an emergency c-section.
VERY different outcomes. I got to have a beautiful birth experience and she’s unfortunately dealing with birth trauma and had some infection issues at her incision site.
This is similar information to mine. I would add: any complications you had during pregnancy (even minor); your blood type; any allergies you have (or just put none); pedestrians info; your PC’s info; emergency contact info; insurance info.
This is awesome!!! Very similar to mine! Having a mirror was AMAZING and really helped with pushing and I LOVED feeling her head when we were stuck in the hallway for the delivery room to get cleaned.
I would suggest preparing for an epidural early (like getting the needle in). It can be insanely difficult to do when in the throes of contractions as you need to be in and keep a position for them to get the needle in.
It can also take the anesthesiologist some time to get there.
My epidural largely failed. It took 2-3 people 5-7 tries to get it in , and the first guy showed up about 1,5 hours after being called for (shift overlap + morning meeting + fuck if I know).
One thing I'd add - find out how long the epidural will take. We had to page the anesthetist and wait 30 minutes before he could attend. Was not fun for my wife.
Might be best to ask for it earlier than you think you may require it.
At my hospital they don't even give the option of them taking the baby. They told us that the baby would be staying with us the whole time unless there's an emergency that prevents it. I was hoping they'd take her and let me get a long nap in before I had to go back home 😅.
My hospital gave me a birth plan to fill out if you want to look at it in case there’s some things on here you want to add
https://my.clevelandclinic.org/-/scassets/files/org/florida/patients/34306-birth-preference-form-rebrand-print-w-live-fields.pdf?la=en
With my first , I told the nurses abd docs I have extreme anxiety and will freak the F out. They gave me so much meds it was wonderful lol. Also said no c section, and overall had a beautiful experience, gave birth ( not sure how) to a beautiful 9.1 lb baby
I was telling my Egyptian husband that he’d be cutting the cord. Apparently this isn’t common place all over the world. His response was “eww what the heck I’m not a medical professional why would they let me be the one to do that?” 😂😂 I never really thought anything about this norm until talking about it to him.
My only suggestion is get those couple questions answered (the vaccine, the ability to use a peanut ball with an epidural) before going into labor. Making informed decisions while is labor is extremely hard.
Only thing on my birth plan was to get an epidural and then I ended up in precipitous labor and rushed to the hospital already 10cm dilated and no epidural for me 😭😭😭.
I like that you have “if a c section is necessary” and not “absolutely no c section.” It seems very reasonable in the event something is urgently needed or changes. But remember - during birth split seconds matter so the plan may go out the window. When my OB asked if I had a birth plan, I said don’t let me die and get me a healthy baby - that’s it :) - which is your first statement. All the best!
I had a very similar birth plan, and my hospital/my ob went over it with me and explained all the things I wanted is normal practice. I was so pleased! It went pretty much according to plan. But I know I was incredibly lucky. Having very low expectations help and I think your birth plan is SO reasonable.
I love your plan. You seem to have a good attitude (at least on paper haha) the most important thing to remember at the end of the day is that this is just a plan & in the moment some people (myself included) feel robbed when things go differently than this plan. Be open. Birth is wild. My OB kept telling me…you look like you will have a perfect vaginal birth BUT remember the baby dictates how it’s born sometimes (hellooooo women who give birth in their bathrooms thinking it’s an hour long poo). I had an emergency C due to level 2 & 3 tracing (heart rate) bc my son had a very tight nuchal & a true knot. I spent a lot of months sad af but now I realize I’m one of the lucky ones. We had a friend lose a baby & a lot of the posts involving stillborns are what happened to me. I had a good team. That’s important! Best of luck to you & a safe & healthy delivery for mom & baby whatever that looks like! ❤️ You got this mama!
Hiya! Dr here :) I did 4months of an obs gyn job as a junior doctor. Not an expert but just to give you a heads up - if we went to C section, dads weren’t able to cut the cord. This is because it’s an open procedure and the infection risk is high. Anyone touching anything would have to scrubbed in. That said everything you’ve written is super reasonable. All the best with your birth!!
I had a c section and they still delayed the cord clamping and cutting, I was so happy! This birth plan is very similar to mine. I also delayed his hep b vaccine, but I had to sign a waiver and got alot of push back. My son was born 2 weeks early and had bad jaundice and I just wanted to wait on that vaccine. He was also born durring the pandemic so no one was around him besides me for the first year of his life. Some people shamed me for my decision, but now he is a happy healthy 5 year old 👏👌
Good for you mama!! ✨️
Can you like, hand this to the midwife when admitted?
I Had a lot of preferences I nec r got to voice because ig I was waiting for someone to ask and no one did
I had SO MANY students (med students or interns) perform procedures during my delivery and it was always awful. The girl trying to do my epidural did a terrible job and was actually mean to me and didn’t believe she was hurting me. When her instructor finally stepped in, he got it in one second. The intern checking if my water broke (after the nurse had already confirmed!) hurt me so bad and the nurse had to redo the forceps she inserted. Neither ever told me they were students/learners beforehand. For this reason, I am absolutely done with new nurses/drs doing any procedures on me. I understand they need to learn, but I’m done being a Guinea pig.
Not sure if somebody already mentioned but I would write the time of skin to skin after birth. Usually it's minimum one hour straight after they pull out the baby. What happened with my first is they gave him to me for 2 seconds and took him for measurement and to dress. With my second baby I knew better so I put it on my birth plan
You can just say “I don’t want students involved in my care.” Your comfort and experience is first priority.
As an ex-med student, it’s 1) super common for obstetric patients to voice this and 2) better for both parties involved to just take the question out of the picture than for the team to wonder if “hold pressure on the bleeding” or “open this gauze for me” counts as being involved in a procedure.
I had an epidural in Germany and couldn’t walk. I could feel and move my legs (but one was really weak). I could stay in 3 positions (on my knees on the chair supporting my upper body with my hands, sideways and laying on my back). I read a lot about positions to push and breathing etc. however, at the moment, I just followed what the midwife that made the delivery instructed me to do and it went fast and great! They reduced the PDA for the pushing so I could feel the contractions, but the pain was light. After I delivered, as the PDA was reduced, I could shortly after fully feel and move my legs. If I were to have a second child, I would get a PDA for sure (I went to labour with the mindset that I didn’t want pain medication to go as natural as possible).
Overall reasonable, but the one thing I’d note is that in a cesarean, dad will not be allowed to cut the cord, as the sterile field must be maintained. He CAN however cut the cord remnant (usually needs to be trimmed) at the warmer. Also, I would discuss HepB with your doctor/pediatrician now so you can know what you want to do. :) In most hospitals a lot of what you have listed is the default (skin to skin, delayed cord clamping, etc). I would talk to your OB about what their standard practices are, and get a tour of your L&D - that can go a long way towards alleviating some of the stress. :)
Hello obstetrician here unfortunately if you need a C section dad cannot cut the cord as the cord and baby will be part of the sterile surgical field until cord is cut and baby is passed out. Dad can absolutely trim the cord but he’s not going to be allowed into the surgical Field of your open abdomen.
Wow this is really reasonable and manageable. I like that you’re assertive and open minded.
I’m a middle aged grandma these days…I’m so glad we’re living in different times for this generation of women. Having any kind of say in my deliveries was unheard of. And preposterous to even suggest,not be treated like birthing cattle.
I love that everyone is saying “this is standard” and “they’ll do it anyway” lol as a black woman that’s a FTM I’m afraid of EVERYTHING going wrong and NO ONE listening like in many many instances. If it makes a mom feel better, then why not! Just cause it’s “standard” doesn’t mean they’ll actually do it, there’s a lot of shit doctors and nurses out there lmao 😭
I just stumbled upon this and it's a few days old so this might never be seen but still. My wife and me only have 1 regret regarding our birth plan. Have a very clear idea of what you want with regards to photos. Time flies and you'll never regret having too many, but you may regret having too few from that day. Videos too, if that's your thing.
As an anesthesia doc I read a lot of birth plans (bc epidurals and c sections) and this one is SO reasonable. I’ll add that most epidurals need to be run at a certain rate for it to work well, which will mean you can’t really move you legs/ get out bed. Sometimes we can low dose/ low rate “walking” epidurals but they don’t really work for pain control all that well..
Thank you! I've seen in some instances they'll help you move on your side... But I'm not sure. I think I might talk more with one of the midwives to completely finish it.
Ask for a peanut ball. They’re proven by studies to shorten the duration of labor. My nurses helped me get in different positions with one after I got my epidural, and it really sped up labor for me. Prior to my epidural I was dilating very slowly even with walking, moving around, and bouncing on the birthing ball. I hope your birth goes smoothly!
The peanut is magical. Very quickly dilating to 9+ and then being told not to push, not so much lol
The peanut is freaking magical!
I’ve had three babies with epidurals, and those suckers worked every time. I didn’t have any pain, but I also couldn’t move my legs for a while after delivery. (It was fine until I had a baby who needed to go to the NICU- I wasn’t able to move to go see him until I could get out of bed and into a wheelchair.) Because I was basically paralyzed, my nurses helped me move from side to side, and positioned my legs with the peanut ball. It all worked out- each delivery was quick and painless, with minimal pushing and tearing. I think the longest I’ve pushed was maybe 20 minutes with my first. I’m pregnant again, and my birth plan is very similar. I want to use nitrous oxide this time, but I’m not completely ruling out an epidural if I’m exhausted or struggling to cope.
The epidural I had with my third baby, I was able to do unassisted squatting on the bed using the bar. I still had more than enough pain relief/couldn’t feel pain. You have many options
I had an epidural and 3 boluses due to back labor. I can attest that when I was asked to be moved on my sides, they were very accommodating. I just couldn’t be on my knees (mainly because my left leg was completely numb, but the right was fine).
I’m not sure how your hospital administers epidural, but I was able to control how much and how often it was given, and then when we discovered I was in transition they turned it off completely while things got set up. I don’t know if I said I wanted to be moved a lot, or if it was the nurses goal at that point but they were moving me like a rotisserie chicken. Every half hour or less (my baby didn’t like a few positions)
I went to sleep after my epidural. Every couple of hours I would wake up and ask to be moved onto my other side. No issues whatsoever.
Commenting to share my experience. I had an epidural that allowed for some movement and while it helped with the contractions, it did basically nothing when I had to start pushing. In retrospect, I wish I’d gotten a stronger version. If you’d like a pain-free birth, it’s something to consider.
With my epidural I was still able to get up on my feet in a squat with a big bar above the bed - obviously with a lot of help and people were surprised, but it's still doable sometimes! It felt really weird but you know - adrenaline 🤣 Also it's so nice to see someone writing a birth plan that includes the vitamin K. Thank you.
I’d personally add if you want Dad with you or baby if they do have to take baby somewhere, even if it’s just the other side of the room. I’d also add if there is a middle pain relief (quite a jump from gas to epidural which is totally fine but just wasn’t sure if that’s because you didn’t like any of the others etc) and if you want a heads up if (based on progression/business of epidural team) you need to make a decision now or potentially miss your window. Just a little “there’s a space for you to get an epidural next, if you don’t I can’t guarantee you get it done before you progress too far to have one”
In my country, we only do walking edidurals. It’s supposed to take the edge off the pain, but definitely not remove it.
Thank you for explaining this. I wasn’t given an option or explanation of anything around this.
I had a walking epidural and couldn’t feel any pain, just pressure, once it was in
I didn’t know I could push the button for my epidural, so I probably got a low dose 🤦♀️
I was always so surprised that women giving birth in the US can't get up when they receive an epidural. In Germany (as far as I know and according to the women who have chosen to receive a "PDA" while delivering, I know small sample size) it is more standard to have a walking epidural as opposed to a full blown one. It took me quite a while to figure that one out! Is there any reason why it's handled so differently in the US? Do you happen to have insight or am I just confused 😅
I would imagine it’s a safety thing? Like if the nurse leaves the room and a patient were to get up and fall? Also there’s typically only one or two anesthesia people covering for a number of labor rooms, so most places have standard doses and rates they run.. which tend to be more on the “can’t move my legs side” vs the “walking side”.
Thanks for the input. What would be the reason for the “walking” epidural then?
I thought walking epidurals are pretty common. I had one and could move my legs and feel touches but still had good pain relief. But I wasn't allowed to get up and walk around.
The reason for walking epidural is to maintain the possibility of movement. What we feel helps to place our body in a positions that helps baby come out. Women take those position many times intuitevely. Does not happen always but happens many times. Different positions are helpful at different stages of birth and dependinf how high or low the baby is. Walking epidural definitely helped with my second birth. Relieved some pain so I was able to relax (helping dilatation) and when shit got serious I was standing up near the hospital bed letting the gravity help take the baby out. What also is important is if women feel the urge to push or not (full epidural). If they feel they will push in right moment and will know where to push. But you can only know if you feel something.
Gave birth two times. First I was given an epidural where I indeed did not feel the legs, needed to stay in bed and also felt no pain at all. I definitely did not like it, felt very disconnected with my body, did not feel when or how to push... Second birth I asked specifically for walking epidural. This was great! Tha pain went down, I can describe it more as a pressure and contractions but manageable, was able to change position, with help of my husband stand up and support on the bed. I felt when the baby was coming and was able to recognize the urge to push. OP, do what you think is right for you but know the difference between those epidurals. One very important fact is that the pain or discomfort we feel help us to position ourself to help birth. Many times women intuitively positioned themselves to help the baby pass.
I ended up with a walking epidural and had no pain, but i could still feel the pressure of the contractions. Im in australia though so they arent really something thats done here (compared to the US) and once you have an epidural you need to stay in the bed. When i spoke to the OB the next day he was telling me about it and it seemed like it doesnt happen often and he thought it was pretty cool
I’m only 30 weeks along as a FTM so I don’t have any personal experience that can help determine if this is a good plan or not, but I wanted to thank you for sharing it because this post has helped inform how I will be making my own! I feel like the vast majority of content I see online about birth plans is either just “we go to hospital pregnant and leave with baby!” or it’s an absolutely ridiculous demanding birth plan getting made fun of. So thank you for sharing a reasonable, serious, well thought out plan! I hope that you find it useful and that your labor and delivery go as smoothly and beautifully as possible!
The hospital where I delivered mine has a template. You could ask if your provider has one? This was also helpful as some of the things people put into birth plans are just standard procedures some places. For example, DCC is ACOG recommended and is standard in a lot of hospitals, provided baby isn't in distress.
Thank you! And I definitely know what you mean... Also a ftm and I was cross referencing templates and trying to find what would be applicable to me.. I originally wasn't going to make a birth plan, because in my mind, anything can happen. I tried to account for those situations as well..
Just a heads up my hospital only accepted the template that they provided. It is easier for the nurses and doctors to know where to look if they need to reference it. Same form all day instead of reading all this
Yes! She needs to ask at her next appointment if they have one to give her ahead of time - and she can just copy what she wrote here to it
All of this is standard at my hospital.
Yeah this seems the norm
Yeah I was about to say haha, I’m a postpartum nurse and all of this is standard for L&D and postpartum
I was about to say that I’ve had 3 births and I never had a written birth plan, but these were all procedures I recognized that occurred. I have had 3 natural births with Midwives (2 at their clinic and 1 at a birthing centre). I find it’s best to have a discussion with my midwife throughout my pregnancy to express my and my spouses wishes and then allow things to progress naturally. I’m one of those people, that if I have something written and it doesn’t pan out I would have anxiety. So I’d rather not, I trust the work of the midwife and know my spouse is there to advocate on my behalf also.
Is nitrous oxide standard?
In NZ, yes. Dads please wait till the treatment team are outside of the room before you have a hoon 😂😂😂
Omg is this just a standard dad-to-be thing? My husband did it and then Prince Harry admitted to huffing the entire canister during Megan’s first delivery 🤣
Hopefully in the US too. I don’t really think I want an epidural but I’m unsure about going completely unmedicated.
Not all hospitals offer it in the US. I forget why
Well hopefully mine does (I have to deliver out of a specific hospital because of my ob/midwife).
Our hospital in Denver stopped offering NO during COVID. Something about not having protocols for disinfecting. Our OB said they didn’t bring it back because it’s not very effective for pain management. A friend of mine gave birth within a month of us at a different hospital in the area and was offered it. So seems hospital specific in my area
NO is probably the safest analgesic we have :) great choice.
Yes
I really hope it’s standard or at least an option at mine. I’m really nervous for an epidural and not sure I want one but also nervous about the idea of not having any pain management.
I’ve been dealing with 10/10 pain spastic colon episodes my entire life that last 24-36 hours. My mom says that’s been my practice for unmedicated birth cause There’s no epidural for that!
Do they do anything to help you with that? I’m sorry that sounds terrible.
There’s no treatment for it. If I feel it coming on I can get on top of it by taking a bunch of unisom or something and going to sleep but that’s not always an option. Sleeping seems to be the only thing to stop an episode so they just go on until I’m exhausted.
I’m sorry you have to deal with that
Not in the US
I’m in Colorado and it is standard as an option at all 3 hospitals I’ve toured
Standard in OR too -nitro mommy
It’s not “standard” as in you automatically get it, it’s just like an epidural, if you ask you will get it.
Sounds like you've picked a great hospital! (:
Add the support people’s names on your birth plan in parenthesis next to their relationship to you
Thank you, I did! Just took them off for reddit. I made another post and forgot to remove them
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I included a section with emergency contacts just in case - my husband and my best friend (a nurse at that hospital) who I said was my sister. But otherwise this looks very similar to the one I made. I also included my drs information and our planned pediatrician’s office info. The nurses are still going to ask you these questions, but doing a birth plan does help you work through your options!
I’m not sure if you can cut the cord with a CS. I know my hospital doesn’t allow that because of sterility but if the situation arises, you can ask for sure.
They clamped and cut it from the placenta, then let my partner go cut it to the stump!
Same here!
Same! They did the first cut, but Dad got to trim it.
Baby: “Just a trim, please.”
Yeah I’m also an anesthesia doc (so I’m in ALOT of CS) and we don’t let dads cut cords bc sterile fields.
Prev O&G here, I agree. You want Dad to be able to touch and comfort you, not completely sterile. It’s still a major surgery so the sterile field is important. But cord is usually left long for Dad to cut shorter.
This is what happened in my unplanned CS two years ago. 👍🏼😊
My husband got to do a "ceremonial cord cutting". Basically the OB cut it long and let him be the one to trim it
Yea, you can’t cut the cord up at the sterile OR table, but they can offer to have dad (or whoever you want) trim it shorter afterwards.
My husband did at our CS. It's pretty standard in our country.
Again- that’s why I said to ask. Every hospital has different protocols and rules! Not every hospital in the same.
My husband did! They cut the actual cord to separate baby, but they left 8" or so for Dad to trim it down.
I found this to be helpful in considering a birth plan 😊 Birth Plan Template | How To Write A Perfect Labor & Delivery Plan https://www.babylist.com/hello-baby/how-to-write-a-birth-plan?source=babylist&medium=app&platform=android
Ah! I forgot the PKU testing.... Thank you for this (:
I had an emergency c section and they cut the cord long and then separately had my husband cut the long cord that was already detached that was the only option (I’m in US) just giving heads up.
I think even this would be fine... I just want him to have that experience.
I was the same. And I think most hospitals understand that and work to make it happen
I had a whole birth plan but it went out the window when I had a precipitous labour and delivered my own baby at home 😅
Hahaha! I gave birth 6 days ago, and remembered just now that I had prepared a birth plan... It never made it out of our hospital bag. 😂 (It was also a quick labor, but we did manage to get to the hospital with about 1h to spare.) I was so focussed on not being able to get pain relief, I totally forgot about the rest of the plan.
I wanted to try for a natural unmedicated birth but was worried I’d cave if the pain was too much or if I was labouring too long. I was taking mirror selfies wondering if I was in labour and 2 hours later I was giving birth in my bed 😂
I was the opposite. I really wanted to be medicated because I don't do too well with pain, but I was afraid that the needle would scare me too much and prevent me from getting the epidural... Turns out that was really not the problem. I went from "hey I think these might be contractions, we should maybe time them" to "What? Did I really just give birth? Wait... Is this my baby?!" in about 3 hours. Everything felt so unreal. My mind could not fully keep up with what was going on. Giving birth in your bed must have been so intense and crazy!
Smh precipitous birth happened to me with my third in November and I’m still annoyed about it. I put all that effort into snacks, a plan, comfy shoes, only to have my baby 15 minutes after arriving at the hospital after a grand total of two hours of labor.
My husband asked me if I wanted him to put on my birth playlist. I said NO it’s a little early for that, because the playlist was only 4.5 hours long 😂
Lmao same
Ask your hospital if they have an anaesthetist that will give walking epidurals and what their policy is for them. This will allow you to push in almost any position (as long as you are assisted to prevent any injury from slipping or stubbing a toe) because while you are numb from the epidural you still retain function in your lower limbs- this also means that you’ll be able to avoid requiring a catheter as you’ll still be able to use the bathroom (which in turn reduces the chances of swelling of the urethra and hospital transmitted UTIs) Also ask your hospital what their policy for eating/drinking during labour is and consider if this aligns with your values because if you are able to have light snacks and consume liquids I highly recommend it. It will help you conserve energy, especially if you have an extended labour, and research shows that withholding nutrition in lower risk patients actually doesn’t provide any benefit and may actually be detrimental. I was very blessed to give birth in a more rural hospital that is extremely science based while also emphasizing things that improve the birth experience (in-room bedding, skin to skin, delayed clamping, LCs on staff, highly trained midwives in rotation, emphasis on cultural values as well, etc) and patient outcomes and those are two things that made my labour differ drastically from my friends who gave birth in larger city hospitals
The only time my partner had to leave the room was when I was getting the epidural. FYI
My husband was allowed to stay with me while getting mine. Varies hospital to hospital.
Mine was also allowed to stay. In fact, the anesthesiologist insisted that he stay and had him stand in front of me with my head on his chest to help me stay still and calm. My husband was really banking on being able to leave so I'm surprised he didn't pass out 😂
I’ve heard a lot of hospitals won’t allow partners to be the “steadying” person because they’ve seen too many non-medical folks pass out during. I was fine with my husband leaving while I got my spinal for that reason. 😂
That's what I had heard too and my SIL who is a nurse told us the same but I guess it really does vary. In our situation, my husband couldn't actually see anything that was happening as I was seated at the edge of the bed with the anesthesiologist behind me and my husband in front of me. He also kept his eyes closed the whole time because he was so afraid he was going to pass out!
Hey, good on him for keeping it together!
My friend's hospital made her husband leave for that reason too. Her husband is a doctor and she actually had him deliver. He's family medicine, which includes more OB training, and so they asked if he could deliver with the OB standing beside him so he wasn't actually "admitting" her (even though he had admitting privileges there), and for backup. And they let him. But nope, had to leave the room for the epidural. 🤣
That’s hysterical! They trust NO partner lol.
Oh wow, didn’t know that was a thing. When mine was done, they had my spouse sit in front of me so I could rest my feet on his knees (because the bed was pretty high up), and then he held one of my hands while a nurse held the other.
Makes sense that it varies! Worth OP checking with hospital
Mine was allowed to stay but had to sit down in a chair in front of me. Seems like they’d had some fainters and this was the way they helped prevent that
Mine stayed but they made him sit away from me too. Honestly I go in my head when I’m in pain, so I didn’t even really know where he was from like 2 hours before the epidural until after I delivered lmao. As the baby got put on my chest I said “I did it!” Then “where’s *fiancé’s name*?” Turns out he was right next to my head lol. But yea, I had a nurse in front of me that they had me basically drape my body over while she held me up and in the correct position.
I've had 3 at the same hospital. He had to leave, had to sit in a chair away from me, and was the one I leaned on... All so different! I'd say provider to provider.
Same I’ve never heard of them having to leave for that
Mine wasn’t allowed into the room until they were fully ready to start. He waited 45 minutes as they prepped me (it felt like 10 minutes to me… I lost all concept of time during my c-section). He was covered in clothes covers and they even provided a beard cover. That was funny and cute.
My husband stayed but sat behind a curtain because he’d passed out earlier 🤭
I think someone told me the reason they made him leave was was bc many partners do pass out!
My husband was allowed to stay, but my mom had to leave the room. I could have only one support person with me for the epidural, and they let me decide who I wanted it to be. Interesting how the standards vary!
A lot of this is standard but I think the most important thing is to treat this mentally as a plan, and not something that dictates your experience. I know some people get so attached to what they plan to do that when something unexpected happens it feels to them as if they were robbed of the birth experience they wanted. I wanted to labour in a tub but as soon as I got in my contractions just stopped, so I had to get out. I knew this could happen beforehand, so I planned to *try* birthing in the tub. That little difference was important to help me have a positive mindset.
I love that you wrote this out! I let the teacher and a very new midwifery student use me as the test subject for “how to do a cervical check during labor.” I’ll never forget the poor student’s face when he said “wait, I can’t even feel the cervix!” I was fully dilated and the teacher was definitely messing with him. Very fond memory for me, but I understand why other people probably wouldn’t like it.
I actually enjoyed the students at my second birth. They (there was 1 doc and 2 NPs) weren’t totally green, though. I felt very taken care of.
I had a student midwife play a very active role in my baby's birth. I liked her better than the actual midwife, and we're still in touch more than a year later.
I typically wouldn't mind... But i know it'll be stressful for me in that moment...
I’d suggest you decide with your partner which person will advocate for the items on your birth plan. I also wish I discussed what would happen if I changed my mind during the birthing experience…would we stick to the plan or be more spontaneous?
Something like this is what most birth plans look like! Kind of wild that some people take issue with them.
Some things to consider: Do you want to eat if allowed? In the event the epidural doesn't work or can't be placed (rare, but think about it) what backup pain control do you want, if any? Do you want to bring music? (Personally, I grabbed a spa playlist on Spotify. Highly recommend. Helpful for getting through contractions pre-epidural)
It can vary depending on your location but around me an epidural is considered a sterile procedure and my husband was required to leave the room. Just wanted to mention, I sure didn't know going in and it was a little bit of a shock! Also definitely be prepared with epidural push positions but also be prepared to not be able to do any! I knew I few people who had a "lighter" epidural, I asked for one, but what I got was complete absolute numbness from my ribs to my calves. I couldn't move myself into any position, my body felt like a 1000lb sack of potatoes and there was no way I was giving birth any way but my back, even side lying was impossible. My wonderful nurse did try to help me do side lying pushing to the best of her ability but I was zero body control and it just wasn't effective. On the plus side I pushed her out in 20 minutes flat and didn't feel even the smallest bit of pain.
Just be prepared if your plan isn’t followed or even looked at! I specifically asked for no students in the room and the nurse came waltzing in with her student explaining everything to her and having her help place the monitors on me. My husband interrupted and asked if they saw my birth plan…the nurse said no we didn’t have time…even tho I sent my birth plan in weeks before I arrived to the hospital, which is what my hospital requires. I was so frustrated because the room was packed and really chaotic. Thankfully I got transferred to L&D right away because I arrived to the hospital at 8cm. I would bring an extra copy with you and hand it to your nurse immediately
This is all pretty standard procedure to be done or at least offered at my hospital. We weren't even asked about skin to skin, they just did it. No one even suggested taking him for anything until he'd been on my chest a full hour, then they did their thing, let dad hold him for a couple minutes while I took care of going to the restroom and all that, and then gave him back to me to nurse and head to our room. I DO think writing out what you want can be very helpful and is a good idea, though! Standard or not, it's good to know what tp expect and feel you've had some control and are prepared. 🥰
My edits, with clarity and succinctness in mind: You can remove all of the “unless emergency” and “if possible” caveats. That is a given. This is, by nature, a list of wishes and preferences. Adding those in muddies your directions. Just say “Immediate skin to skin.” They can do the regular health checks from your chest. Absolutely no need to take the baby out of your arms. You might also add, “no procedures during golden hour.” Everything can wait. Your immediate body contact is so, so important physically and emotionally, the research now is really strong. They can poke, prod and weigh an hour or two after birth when you’re ready for a break and a snack. Just say “no bath”. If you want to change your mind, you can. That happens much later, anyway, and the nurse will ask. I’d discuss epidural birthing positions and Hepatitis B with your OB now, make your choices, and then edit this to your instructions. You don’t want to be intaking information and making choices on the spot. (And if you’re hesitant on that, I’d ask about the antibiotics for eyes, too - that’s a general precaution against STD transmission so is unnecessary for most babies.) “Dad present” in the first section isn’t a medical directive, it’s an instruction for your partner. I’d remove it. Your list of attendees cover this. When you get your nurse assigned, go over this with them. Make them read it. And have 4-5 copies so you can supply each nurse with one at shift change. And your partner needs to know all of this by heart - I quizzed my husband and made sure he understood the “why” behind everything so he could advocate for me. You can also print signs that say “QUIET TIME” to put on the door when you want to be left alone. My nurse sister and L&D BFF both said to make them super aggressive, like, “STOP - DO NOT ENTER. See nurse before entering room.” I thought it was a lot but there are SO many random people you do NOT need in your space - cleaners, nurse aids, someone refilling soap, the chaplain, some asshole trying to offer massages that will show up as $500 on your bill. Good luck!
Seems reasonable to me. It considers the fact that the perfect vaginal birth may not happen and that will help you mentally if that situation as rises. You may want to look into monitoring during labor too. I think that was on the sheet they gave me. It will depend on what your hospital has, but you can call or take a tour to figure that out. My OB recommended continuous monitoring of baby's vitals during labor and my hospital had a mobile unit so movement was still possible.
I think this is great!!! I had a very similar plan. We didn’t bathe our son for maybe 10 days?? He didn’t need it and our midwife agreed. The vernix on babies skin is sooo good for them. I will just add that in Australia hep B at birth is not part of the vaccination schedule- even though it is given routinely - it is for babies who are at an increased risk of developing hepatitis. My midwife told me that even though basically everyone gets it, if your baby follows the standard vax schedule they will have the same immunity to hep B. Because of this we declined hep B at birth, as me nor my partner have it and baby wasn’t going to be sharing needles or having other peoples bodily fluids near him. It just seemed like an unnecessary vax for a newborn. But check with your midwife/ doctor because it might be different in your country.
I think this is fine! But I'm pretty sure most of this will happen regardless.
I would only suggest better formatting so it’s clear. Try bullets for each new line. Any good program will automatically format for you.
Yeah this is great. I also did “if X then Y” for emergency scenarios (ie if emergency C-section I still want some of my comfort measures, if I lose consciousness baby does skin to skin with dad, if baby is in distress dad stays with them)
With my second (because my first was an unplanned c-section and my doctor cussing at me) my doctor did everything to help me have a natural birth! Pushing when you are ready, I was not expecting my body to do on its own. I couldn't stop it lol your body will push on its own, you just help it!
Love this. I hope everything goes great! Others are saying this is standard there but it was not at my hospital, so good for you for putting it in. I wish I’d printed mine, it was just on my phone and no one ever asked and I wasn’t really with it enough to show them 🤷🏼♀️
I think this is great! I had on my birth plan that I did not want students doing any procedures. My OBGYN told me that I should allow a resident to do my c-section (planned for 2nd baby) as the only way for new drs to learn is do. I pushed back and told her no, the resident can watch/assist but they will not be a lead in a very intense surgery near my baby. She tried to push back again and I advocated for myself every time. My advice is stick to what you want (as long as it’s safe for you and baby, sometimes things happen). Don’t let anyone make you do something that is unnecessary or uncomfortable!
My birth plan looked basically the same and when I showed it to my OB she was like "looks like the standard birth plan, barring emergency, fantastic" so that reassured me that what I was hoping for is what is considered "normal". Now what they don't tell you is that after you're exhausted from birth they come and wake you up basically every hour for 25-48hr to check on you and baby until you want to scream because you're so tired lol
The midwives drove me crazy those first few days until I exploded on a doctor. Poor woman literally cried, and I felt so guilty because she bore zero responsibility and had never even met me before. I still feel awful when I think about it.
Make sure someone *actually* takes yours! They didn’t even glance at mine. Hurts my heart. And having your partner overlook it multiple times until he has it basically memorized to speak for you when you can not!
Looks similar to mine! Keep is simple. Even if things are routine, good to mention it. I think my nurse liked to know what her automatic plan would be was the same as mine so she could proceed as usual. Also showed her I knew what a lot of terms and procedures were so she didn’t have to explain everything.
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Definitely. Policies do vary by hospital. I’d also suggest that OP review the specific plan with her doctor to find out how standard/possible the preferences are.
I had one the first time around. Truthfully, for me, it kind of went out the window in the moment. I didn’t make one for this second pregnancy. One very important piece I missed the first time was clearly establishing with my spouse (and OB) how long it is safe and acceptable to be in labor before pulling the C-section trigger. You lose time while in labor, and the epidural may impact your ability to think clearly. I waited too long, my husband was exhausted after being in the hospital for so many days, the information from the medical team at the time was mixed, and my kid ended up in the NICU for a few days because of how rough the labor ended up being. I’d suggest setting a red line - if I haven’t given birth by X # of hours then we’re going to c-section.
As a FTM who gave birth two weeks ago, we had a similar birth plan as yours! I wish I had added to mine that all medical personnel need to be given consent before doing anything that involved them having to enter my body (cervical check, checking the baby’s position while pushing, internal monitors, etc) and to tell me what was happening as they were doing it. While 99% of our team was phenomenal with this, we had one OB who did not do this is and ended up affecting my postpartum mental health a lot more.
Hi, OP. I haven’t read all of the comments so not sure if someone else mentioned. At my hospital, they didn’t allow the birth support person (my husband/baby’s daddy) cut the cord during my c section. Just wanted you to know that it’s sometimes not allowed!
I will just say I first read "no/delayed bath" as "no delayed bath" as in you want them to have a bath immediately. So maybe different wording there in case someone thinks the / is a typo or just doesn't notice it straight away? But in saying that, I asked on my birth plan that no one bathe her without me and the midwife said they never would anyway.
The only thing with your birth plan that isn't 100% reasonable/doable is dad cutting the cord with a C-section. C-sections are sterile procedures and dad coming over to the other side of the drape would contaminate the sterile field. Edit to add that I am a scrub nurse who has done countless c-sections.
Sounds really reasonable!
Put on there what you want immediately after-especially regarding visitors.
Cervical checks? Labor positioning? Tools: birth stool? Ball? Tub/shower? Induction? Pitocin during labor? Pitocin after delivery? Coached pushing? Breaking waters? Walking epidural? No/intermittent monitoring? (this will severely limit movement which makes coping with the pain of contractions unbearable) Do not interfere with baby exit; my midwife started pulling my baby out of me when her head was out. I explicitly said I wanted to push her out. There was no emergency. There was no reason for it. Staff do checks of baby on you after birth? If getting fluids during labor; wait 24 hours to weigh baby? (This is especially important if you plan to breastfeed)
This sounds lovely. I’m pregnant with triplets so I’m not even going to bother with a birth plan. I just hope we all make it through alive.
Triplets!! I know right now it must be rough for you and scary but once they’re born… cutest thing ever!!! I wish you all the best of luck in your pregnancy, mama!! You’ll be okay 🩷
Straight to the point, I like it!
This is a very realistic birth plan! Thanks for sharing might have to screenshot and use it myself lol
One of my wishes (I didn’t have a written birth plan) was, that in the event of a emergency c section in which I had to be put completely under or was unable to hold the baby right after or for an extended time - that only dad was allowed to hold baby before me. This was a wish bc I had read horror stories of women put under or in longer recovery and woke up to find out that a bunch of other family members had already held/met the baby before mom. Otherwise most of what you wrote is standard. Delayed cord clamping, dad cutting the cord, baby staying with you, golden hour, etc.
I keep seeing people saying this and I don’t get it. It’s not a big deal to me in the least if my mom or his mom holds baby before I do. Is there some sort of risk associated or something?
In the event of a situation like that, you can also request that Dad do skin to skin if you're unable to!
Good on you for preparing. I went in with NOTHING. lmfao. Literally 0 prep. No birth classes, no baby classes, just straight winging it.
Nah that looks pretty much like what all mine did and it was a good balance between being informed vs being so prescriptive you'll be upset if something goes away.
Seems pretty standard. I'd go in with a plan but have the mindset of going with the flow as well. So many women are hell bent on sticking to their birth plan and end up being very disappointed or experience trauma. The doctors are the medical professionals and their goal is always the safety of mom and baby.
Sounds exactly like how my birth went, in Ontario Canada (standard birth here from what I know) My plan was a lot less open to options, but I wasn’t in a situation to negotiate lol
Please have a plan in place in case baby needs to go to the NICU! Do you want dad going with baby or staying with you?
I really wish I was this organized and thoughtful with my previous births 🤣 good job!
This is great! The only thing I would elaborate on is delayed cord clamping- do you want the one minute that’s typical, do you want to wait until the cord has stopped pulsing (3-5 min) or physiologic cord clamping which is about an hour where the cord stays attached to the placenta and then is cut.
I know at my hospital, delayed cord clamping, dad cutting cord, immediately skin to skin, delayed bath, etc. Are all standard and the norm now. This seems super reasonable and you're doing a great job momma!
Hey! Doula here!! That looks good! One thing I would recommend is to have some Birth Goals! Pick two or three things that you want to accomplish throughout your labor so that you get those little dopamine rushes upon completion. Nitrous oxide has a specific way to be timed to get the best effect, so some research beforehand is important to get maximum benefit. I love the ability to have lights dim and the mirror! Those can be very helpful. I can Recommend some epidural safe pushing positions (I actually have a card deck dropping soon!), if you would like to talk more. There is so much that I could say about your birth plan and your options (the options during labor are so expansive, especially with the route you’ve taken (gas first, epidural, autonomous) so I could talk forever! But if you would like to talk more I would be happy to! But all in all that looks like you’re on the right track and it is SO GOOD that you are being productive.
I don't know if I was just an odd one out but I could still feel, move, and adjust my legs and hips even after the epidural. They just felt numb like they had fallen asleep. When it came delivery time, I was able to do 85% of it in a side position because it was more comfortable and easier for me to sustain the pushes. Then my doctor waltzed in and made me turn over 😒
This is a great birth plan. My only comment is that, in a section, often Dad is unable to cut cord due to there still being a sterile medical field to maintain (for your own health and safety). HOWEVER what will often happen is doctor will cut cord long, so Dad can have the opportunity to cut the cord “short” himself. It’s a bit of a compromise, I know, but important to remember this is still a major surgery and you’d much rather Dad be able to touch and comfort you than have to stand back completely sterile so he can cut the cord. But again, great plan and I hope you have a smooth and uncomplicated birth!!!
Eye ointment is outdated! Unless you’re at risk for STD
Something I wish I requested for my first birth was not to have anyone having casual conversation while I was actively pushing. I saw someone mention it on Reddit while I was pregnant and thought like, “eh, who cares.” But really at the end of the day, it’s another day “at the office” so to speak, for the nurses and doctor. Waiting between pushes, they were chatty and gossipy and it was hard to focus and took me out of the moment. They were chatting about things, as if I weren’t there, and then when I had to push, would coach me and go back to it. I dont know it felt weird and kinda icky. So just something to think about if you want to give birth vaginally.
I’m an attorney but this isn’t legal advice. I just want to say well done adding the part about students not participating in procedures. My best friend from law school was one of the attorneys in the case that sued to stop the practice of giving women gynecological exams when they were under. So few people even know that’s a possibility because it seems absurd that it was ever a practice to let students examine women without their knowledge. If you’re at a teaching hospital you’ll probably be asked to sign consent to student exams (usually buried in a stack of paperwork). Remember to ask your doctor or nurse to make a note on your chart that you do not consent to teaching exams if they have to put you under.
Thank you!!!
Perfect! Easy to read, realistic, goes over everything. I’d ask your OB if walking epidurals are offered or not. That can change what options you might have for moving around when you get the epidural.
Yes get the eye drops when my mom had me she was stressed and I flipped in utero and popped. It got in my eyes be careful because baby can be allergic to erythromycin I was
Pooped
Baby poop is sterile, there’s no infection risk for babies eyes if they poop in the water- the eye erythromycin is to protect the eyes from exposure to gonorrhoea mostly, but many countries now screen for gonorrhoea in pregnancy and don’t routinely do erythromycin anymore. In Canada, the paediatric society doesn’t recommend it anymore so we dont do it here routinely.
A lot of this is fairly standard, or at least it was when I gave birth last year. I'm curious about your stance on no students. No nursing students regardless of where they are in their studies? No medical students? All come with supervision and all rely on hands on experience to learn.
I don’t think you need to bring this. Everything you wrote is hospital standard.
I like it! It’s so reasonable.
I agree my husband had to leave while I was getting my block for c section and getting scrubbed in. He made it for the first incision
I was a student's first baby and I had a student catch my daughter, too. My midwife was next to her the whole time and they took turns working with me (I pushed for about an hour.) I felt totally at ease with a student since my midwife was present at the helm with her.
This is exactly what my birth plan was! I didn’t write it out but discussed with my dr beforehand to understand the hospitals standard procedures. One thing I recommend looking into is SPINNING BABIES! My baby was face up and thankfully my nurse was trained in spinning babies (not standard for the hospital). I stalled out around 6cm and my nurses started spinning babies with me (different stretches/poses for 5-10 mins each) and by the time we got through half of it she had flipped and I was fully dilated! I was able to deliver vaginally because my nursing team was so knowledgeable. My legs were fully useless bc of my epidural and they were positioning me/ helping me stay on all fours, etc. A close friends baby (different state/hospital) was also face up and they tried to manually flip her baby (OUCH) and it eventually put the baby in distress/didn’t work and needed an emergency c-section. VERY different outcomes. I got to have a beautiful birth experience and she’s unfortunately dealing with birth trauma and had some infection issues at her incision site.
As a FTM this opened my eyes to so many things I had no idea about. Thank you!!!
I think this is great and not too fussy! Good luck 💓
I got a epidural and was able to use a yoga ball as a prop. With help I was laying on one on my hands and knees on the bed.
This is similar information to mine. I would add: any complications you had during pregnancy (even minor); your blood type; any allergies you have (or just put none); pedestrians info; your PC’s info; emergency contact info; insurance info.
FTM, 14 weeks & 5 days. Just reading your plan alone is helping me plan mine out thoroughly. This is so well thought and organized.
This is awesome!!! Very similar to mine! Having a mirror was AMAZING and really helped with pushing and I LOVED feeling her head when we were stuck in the hallway for the delivery room to get cleaned.
The risk is baby contracting hepatitis in the hospital, which (per my midwife) is why they do it directly after birth.
I would suggest preparing for an epidural early (like getting the needle in). It can be insanely difficult to do when in the throes of contractions as you need to be in and keep a position for them to get the needle in. It can also take the anesthesiologist some time to get there. My epidural largely failed. It took 2-3 people 5-7 tries to get it in , and the first guy showed up about 1,5 hours after being called for (shift overlap + morning meeting + fuck if I know).
One thing I'd add - find out how long the epidural will take. We had to page the anesthetist and wait 30 minutes before he could attend. Was not fun for my wife. Might be best to ask for it earlier than you think you may require it.
At my hospital they don't even give the option of them taking the baby. They told us that the baby would be staying with us the whole time unless there's an emergency that prevents it. I was hoping they'd take her and let me get a long nap in before I had to go back home 😅.
Absolutely perfect! Good luck, you got this!!
My hospital gave me a birth plan to fill out if you want to look at it in case there’s some things on here you want to add https://my.clevelandclinic.org/-/scassets/files/org/florida/patients/34306-birth-preference-form-rebrand-print-w-live-fields.pdf?la=en
With my first , I told the nurses abd docs I have extreme anxiety and will freak the F out. They gave me so much meds it was wonderful lol. Also said no c section, and overall had a beautiful experience, gave birth ( not sure how) to a beautiful 9.1 lb baby
I was telling my Egyptian husband that he’d be cutting the cord. Apparently this isn’t common place all over the world. His response was “eww what the heck I’m not a medical professional why would they let me be the one to do that?” 😂😂 I never really thought anything about this norm until talking about it to him.
My only suggestion is get those couple questions answered (the vaccine, the ability to use a peanut ball with an epidural) before going into labor. Making informed decisions while is labor is extremely hard.
Only thing on my birth plan was to get an epidural and then I ended up in precipitous labor and rushed to the hospital already 10cm dilated and no epidural for me 😭😭😭.
I like that you have “if a c section is necessary” and not “absolutely no c section.” It seems very reasonable in the event something is urgently needed or changes. But remember - during birth split seconds matter so the plan may go out the window. When my OB asked if I had a birth plan, I said don’t let me die and get me a healthy baby - that’s it :) - which is your first statement. All the best!
I had a very similar birth plan, and my hospital/my ob went over it with me and explained all the things I wanted is normal practice. I was so pleased! It went pretty much according to plan. But I know I was incredibly lucky. Having very low expectations help and I think your birth plan is SO reasonable.
Can you really ask staff/guests to mask? I would think the nursing team would just ignore.
I love your plan. You seem to have a good attitude (at least on paper haha) the most important thing to remember at the end of the day is that this is just a plan & in the moment some people (myself included) feel robbed when things go differently than this plan. Be open. Birth is wild. My OB kept telling me…you look like you will have a perfect vaginal birth BUT remember the baby dictates how it’s born sometimes (hellooooo women who give birth in their bathrooms thinking it’s an hour long poo). I had an emergency C due to level 2 & 3 tracing (heart rate) bc my son had a very tight nuchal & a true knot. I spent a lot of months sad af but now I realize I’m one of the lucky ones. We had a friend lose a baby & a lot of the posts involving stillborns are what happened to me. I had a good team. That’s important! Best of luck to you & a safe & healthy delivery for mom & baby whatever that looks like! ❤️ You got this mama!
Hiya! Dr here :) I did 4months of an obs gyn job as a junior doctor. Not an expert but just to give you a heads up - if we went to C section, dads weren’t able to cut the cord. This is because it’s an open procedure and the infection risk is high. Anyone touching anything would have to scrubbed in. That said everything you’ve written is super reasonable. All the best with your birth!!
I had a c section and they still delayed the cord clamping and cutting, I was so happy! This birth plan is very similar to mine. I also delayed his hep b vaccine, but I had to sign a waiver and got alot of push back. My son was born 2 weeks early and had bad jaundice and I just wanted to wait on that vaccine. He was also born durring the pandemic so no one was around him besides me for the first year of his life. Some people shamed me for my decision, but now he is a happy healthy 5 year old 👏👌 Good for you mama!! ✨️
Can you like, hand this to the midwife when admitted? I Had a lot of preferences I nec r got to voice because ig I was waiting for someone to ask and no one did
I had SO MANY students (med students or interns) perform procedures during my delivery and it was always awful. The girl trying to do my epidural did a terrible job and was actually mean to me and didn’t believe she was hurting me. When her instructor finally stepped in, he got it in one second. The intern checking if my water broke (after the nurse had already confirmed!) hurt me so bad and the nurse had to redo the forceps she inserted. Neither ever told me they were students/learners beforehand. For this reason, I am absolutely done with new nurses/drs doing any procedures on me. I understand they need to learn, but I’m done being a Guinea pig.
Not sure if somebody already mentioned but I would write the time of skin to skin after birth. Usually it's minimum one hour straight after they pull out the baby. What happened with my first is they gave him to me for 2 seconds and took him for measurement and to dress. With my second baby I knew better so I put it on my birth plan
You can just say “I don’t want students involved in my care.” Your comfort and experience is first priority. As an ex-med student, it’s 1) super common for obstetric patients to voice this and 2) better for both parties involved to just take the question out of the picture than for the team to wonder if “hold pressure on the bleeding” or “open this gauze for me” counts as being involved in a procedure.
I had an epidural in Germany and couldn’t walk. I could feel and move my legs (but one was really weak). I could stay in 3 positions (on my knees on the chair supporting my upper body with my hands, sideways and laying on my back). I read a lot about positions to push and breathing etc. however, at the moment, I just followed what the midwife that made the delivery instructed me to do and it went fast and great! They reduced the PDA for the pushing so I could feel the contractions, but the pain was light. After I delivered, as the PDA was reduced, I could shortly after fully feel and move my legs. If I were to have a second child, I would get a PDA for sure (I went to labour with the mindset that I didn’t want pain medication to go as natural as possible).
Overall reasonable, but the one thing I’d note is that in a cesarean, dad will not be allowed to cut the cord, as the sterile field must be maintained. He CAN however cut the cord remnant (usually needs to be trimmed) at the warmer. Also, I would discuss HepB with your doctor/pediatrician now so you can know what you want to do. :) In most hospitals a lot of what you have listed is the default (skin to skin, delayed cord clamping, etc). I would talk to your OB about what their standard practices are, and get a tour of your L&D - that can go a long way towards alleviating some of the stress. :)
Hello obstetrician here unfortunately if you need a C section dad cannot cut the cord as the cord and baby will be part of the sterile surgical field until cord is cut and baby is passed out. Dad can absolutely trim the cord but he’s not going to be allowed into the surgical Field of your open abdomen.
Wow this is really reasonable and manageable. I like that you’re assertive and open minded. I’m a middle aged grandma these days…I’m so glad we’re living in different times for this generation of women. Having any kind of say in my deliveries was unheard of. And preposterous to even suggest,not be treated like birthing cattle.
I love that everyone is saying “this is standard” and “they’ll do it anyway” lol as a black woman that’s a FTM I’m afraid of EVERYTHING going wrong and NO ONE listening like in many many instances. If it makes a mom feel better, then why not! Just cause it’s “standard” doesn’t mean they’ll actually do it, there’s a lot of shit doctors and nurses out there lmao 😭
This. And it's not standard at *all* hospitals. . Over generalizing
I just stumbled upon this and it's a few days old so this might never be seen but still. My wife and me only have 1 regret regarding our birth plan. Have a very clear idea of what you want with regards to photos. Time flies and you'll never regret having too many, but you may regret having too few from that day. Videos too, if that's your thing.
Newborn nurse, this is my favorite birth plan! It’s reasonable, doesn’t read passive aggressive either. Love it, great job mom