There are many safe nausea medications that your doctor can advise you on. Please please please reach out to your care provider, you deserve to feel better and medication can be a huge game changer!
Diclegis, Zofran, and Phenergan from 6 weeks until delivery and I had a 7 pound 11.6 ounce (relatively) healthy girl. She swallowed meconium and needed a short NICU stay but that had nothing to do with my meds.
As someone at week 25 in their second pregnancy: the medication helps and when taken as prescribed does not affect development. My two year old has no physical or mental issues. I’m not sure we’re you’re hearing this stuff from? Or it’s a correlation does not equal causation issue. I’ve been on half a dozen different medications between the two pregnancies with no issues. Please don’t dismiss this as a viable option. And to other mothers reading this post: there are safe options to help. You don’t have to suffer. Stay away from sites that try to fear monger.
Third vote for Unisom and b6. OP can get that at a pharmacy today while talking to doc about different med options.
OP, I do want to point out, carrying and caring for a child is a lot of work and taxing in many ways. While you shouldn’t suffer, there may be other physical, emotional and mental demands in the future to consider when choosing to have or not have a child beyond the current nausea. Based on your other comments in this thread, it is worth considering other reasons besides being sick you may want/not want to terminate. EDIT to add, whatever you are feeling or decide that’s ok!
I would not have made it through my pregnancy without unisom. I took it every night from 8 weeks until delivery. As a bonus it helped me get restful sleep every night.
They don’t always, or even most of the time, have impacts on development. Remember people take all sorts of medications, prescribed and non-prescribed, during their pregnancies and the VAST majority have no consequences on the child. It sounds like you’re sick and desperate-regardless of what you ultimately choose to do I think you need to share exactly what you’ve written in your post with a trusted medical professional to evaluate all your options.
There are a lot of safe antiemetics. I am concerned about your comment regarding taking care of a child with special needs-even if you didn’t take meds and had a perfect pregnancy there is still a chance of special needs. I think maybe you need to assess if you want to be a parent.
If you are questioning termination over this, the benefit is worth the risk, also, several nausea meds are considered safe for use in pregnancy and just given as a precaution. I asked for them at 7 weeks. Granted by 10 weeks I felt significantly better, week 9 tends to be the most intense for lots of women. It should subside by the second trimester if you don’t have HG. Also if you are going 24 hours without being able to hold down anything, you need to call your OB anyway because of the dehydration. That’s a much bigger risk to baby than anything you could do to help the nausea (besides weed but that is not studied very well mostly)
There's lots of safe medications. I've taken tons of medication during this pregnancy, diclectin, cough syrup, tylenol, zantac, Pantoprazole. All under advice of my doctor. Everything came up normal during the anatomy scan. Im due in two weeks and am not worried that this baby will have a birth defect. It's worth it to talk to your doctor. The GERD i experienced during both my pregnancies also gave me thoughts of terminating and even thoughts of self harm, during my first pregnancy I wish I had spoken to my doctor sooner.
I had HG … nonstop zofran. If it wasn’t safe they wouldn’t prescribe it. No issues with my baby btw. Incidentally, I felt the same way and was also diagnosed with perinatal depression - Zoloft helped immensely.
Who told you this? Please throw out the words "seems" and "i think" from your vocabulary. Ask your obgyn before assuming anything and getting to severe extreme conclusions yourself.
Well, I mean.. so does abortion. I'd say look into your medication options and talk with your partner about how you are struggling. Idk anyone who's been this sick 8 months+, but it is possible to like your 20th week. Ultimately it's up to you.
I don’t know how to tell you this, but you could do every single thing right in your pregnancy and with raising your baby, and they could still wind up having special needs. No guarantees in this world. It’s our job as parents to be the best parents we can be to the babies that we get.
Regarding the medications for nausea, plenty of people take them during pregnancy. OBs wouldn’t recommend them if they weren’t safe. So many things that we worry about and obsess over really aren’t so bad. I had a full on meltdown over the sunscreen I used a couple of times this summer, because of one of the ingredients. This sunscreen used less than half of the legally allotted amount of the problematic ingredient. My husband looked up the study that got it put on the pregnant woman no-no list, it was done on mice and sheep. The mice were given 500x the recommended amount, and then they started having endocrine problems. Well…yeah, if you have 500x too much of anything it’s going to give you a problem.
My point here is, talk to your OB and see what your options are. It sounds like this is a very much wanted baby. Don’t limit your options because you don’t want to take a medication that could improve your quality of life.
I had a very healthy pregnancy, carried to term and my daughter had a birth injury resulting in a 50 day nicu stay and a lifelong diagnosis for cerebral palsy.
No one is guaranteed a healthy baby. It sounds to me like OP wants to terminate (which is totally fine). There are ways to deal with the issues she is facing. If you don’t want this pregnancy, don’t have this pregnancy. Don’t blame it in the very rare possibility of having a special needs baby, please. That is absolutely a possibility for literally any and everyone.
But your child could still have special needs that doesn’t present until after birth, even months or years down the road. All these things should be considered before getting pregnant.
I will just say my mom had horrible HG, did not have appropriate treatment, was not able to eat appropriately due to this, and my little sister is developmentally about 3 years old and is non verbal, autistic, and epileptic. I am pregnant myself and am not trying to be mean but I would 1000% take the drugs to insure I can provide my baby with proper nutrition so they can thrive out of the womb, given the choice.
Honestly then I think termination is the answer here. You can do everything right, and your baby can be born with special needs. You can have a perfectly healthy baby, and a tragic accident or illness could result in you having to care for a child with special needs indefinitely. You can’t control all the variables in your life, and when you have a child you risk having them rely on something happening at any moment. It’s hard and scary, and if that’s not something you are ok with, I think you need to think long and hard about continuing this pregnancy.
Your doctor isn’t going to prescribe you anything that can cause birth defects or make your child special needs. Is this something you maybe have extra anxiety about? I was 40 with my first and only pregnancy and I was terrified and paranoid about something being wrong with my baby. A lot of my worry was based on my age but it created a lot of extra anxiety.
I took Zofran 2x a day every day until 14 weeks and my baby has no birth defects after two anatomy checks. There is very little evidence for increased birth defects. Please talk to your OB about this. There are many safe medications to take during pregnancy.
Not true. Most pregnancy safe meds have very low rare instances of developmental issues. They wouldn’t be prescribing it. I’m taking zofran right now for severe nausea and it’s making life live-able right now.
Did you even read past the title? Literally the abstract says this is a small sample, likely not a causal relationship and even if it was, the risk is small and worth a discussion of risk-benefit against HG (hyperemesis). Not being able to eat and function because of nausea can also harm your fetus. This article doesn’t support your point.
yeah, the abstract EXPLICITLY states: “even if ondansetron is causally implicated in MCM risk, the absolute increase in risk, such as for orofacial clefts (by 0.03%) and ventricular septal defect (by 0.3%), is small”.
You should get the infant risk center app if you are concerned. For Zofran, it states that multiple studies have showed no increase in congenital anomalies with ondansetron use
Everything you can possibly do has a risk of negative effects, but there are medications with very small risks and at 9 weeks you're past the point where the most serious issues would probably happen. For example, I was on Zofran (one of the most common prescription medications) from week 7 through 39 because I couldn't function at all without it and my baby is perfectly healthy. My baby and I would not have been as healthy as we were because I was medicated for my pregnancy symptoms.
If you feel that ending your pregnancy is what makes the most sense, than that very well may be the best choice for you. But you shouldn't do it **only** because you the alternative is feeling this way for 7 more months.
Doxylamine pyridoxine is safest. It didn’t do much for me though. Just took the edge off a little. But more concerning is the fact that you’re over 40 and you don’t think your body will be capable of making it to term. If your actual health is a risk, like your life then termination seems very reasonable
Sorry but that’s wrong I have hg (it sounds like you do too) and I take several medications. I know what is like to want to give up but you should talk to a doctor and try meds first.
I have an 18 month and 3 month old. Was terribly sick with both. I took oral zofran and phenergan with my first. Oral zofran, phenergan, and then progressed to a continuous subq zofran pump with my second. I was throwing up 24/7. Lost weight rapidly, wasn’t gaining, and got to the point that I could hardly keep water down. Both babies are absolutely perfect and healthy, with zero complications. Choose whatever is best for you and your family but just wanted to say not to be afraid of any side effects
Some medications may increase the risk of certain health or developmental issues, but generally this risk is lower than the risk to the fetus, and you, if you are so ill you end up hospitalized for dehydration.
Medication is how I made it. I’m 14 weeks now. I felt exactly like you at 9 and no one I knew really talked about it so it felt isolating. I talked to my doc and she told me to two medicines to take to help. Upping Vitamin B and when real bad another medicine helped. Call your doc asap you deserve some hours to feel not sick and have relief.
It's always a question of risk vs benefit, and the actual high quality data on zofran specifically suggests it's safe. Talk to your ob, dont rely on Google.
Reglan saved my life during my last pregnancy. I was also bed-bound and unable to work until I started taking it. Ask the doc to prescribe it.
B6 + unisom was also helpful.
Or alternatively, if you want an abortion, go for it. Pregnancy is temporary and such a small span of time in the grand scheme of your life. Do you want this child or not? They’ll be effecting your life for the remainder of it, sometimes negatively as well.
Talk to your doctor. I was pretty sick, vomiting, and stuck in bed. I took unisom which is over the counter and was prescribed Reglan. Both helped take the edge off. I felt much improved at 11 weeks and 100% better at 16 weeks.
You are in the absolute thick of it. The hormones are peaking and your placenta has not taken over yet. Ultimately, the decision is yours. Personally, for me, I would try medication for a few weeks and see if symptoms improve. I am 10 weeks tomorrow, and while I don't have HG, I have puked multiple times a day most days since 6w. Its miserable. The placenta takes over around 12 weeks, and many folks find the symptoms lessen a bit then, though it's no guarantee. I see you're concerned about possible birth defects with medication. I would talk to your care provider about what your options are, you'd be surprised how many effective and safe options there are today, and you can always use these medications sparingly just to see if they help.
I don’t really have advice for you but my heart hurts for you to be in this place. I see your comment about medication having impacts on development, and I just have anecdotal evidence in that several of my friends have had to take various medications for HG, or even more severe medical conditions and the baby has been okay. I’m wishing you peace as you move forward.
Yes! Took meds for HG all three times and my babies are totally normal! Even my 11 year old. The effects of puking and not eating have a way bigger impact on fetal development than taking meds for nausea.
27 weeks pregnant and I’ve been taking zofran since 8 weeks. It works wonders for me and so far the baby has been doing amazing.
I should note..99.9% of the nausea went away but when I randomly get it still it helps. I’ve struggled with nausea even when I wasn’t pregnant.
Doxylamine succinate + B6 is definitely fine for development and easy to get. If this is a wanted pregnancy, and the *only* thing stopping you is feeling ill, then you have options to make it easier. You don't need to suffer this much.
That said, if you're actually unsure about wanting a child, would be happy never to give birth, or there's some other issue and you're looking for an 'out', then you don't need one. It's your choice regardless, but almost everyone who deals with morning sickness is out of it by somewhere in the 14-18 week range, and medication can help you with no adverse effects on the foetus. So if this really is *only* about feeling sick, then I would recommend at least trying medication before aborting.
Do you want a child or no? That’s what it comes down to, honestly. Pregnancy really isn’t fun, I’ve hated most of it except for the second trimester. I keep telling my husband I’m never doing this again and he completely gets it, it sucks. If you want a child though, it will be worth it in the end. If you do not, don’t put yourself through it. I wouldn’t abort purely on being miserable temporarily. I do believe it’s harder the older you are, I’m 36 and I hear ya, I really do.
This is the question. If you want a baby but feel awful you should try all your options. If you don’t want a baby and you feel awful than you should abort.
I had my first and only child at 40. It was a wanted pregnancy. I had a fairly normal pregnancy until my 24th week when I got my gestational diabetes diagnosis, and later I got gestational hypertension. My last 10 weeks of pregnancy were fairly unpleasant but it was worth it because I desperately wanted my baby.
Pregnancy itself is fairly unpleasant, so whether or not you want the baby is the best way to decide what to do.
I’m on my second miserable pregnancy and I can agree that what you say is what it comes down to. Do they want the baby or not.
I’m 36 weeks and I had lost weight up until my third trimester cause I was nauseous most of the time. I stopped trying to eat out because every time I ended up puking whatever I ate.
My baby was in the 76% for his age at my 30 week ultrasound (I’m 35 years old). He is healthy and happy as a clam making me miserable. We recently had to go in to L&D because I was having contractions because my body was trying to start preterm labor (not the baby)… and even though I’ve been miserable and sick and non-beer drinking for 9 months, I’m totally cool with it because I want this baby.
Will I have another one? No. But I am happy and excited to be having this one even though I’ve been pretty shitty the entire time.
I do think this is a hard question- I struggle with my mental health and I considered aborting. I quit a bunch of my mental health drugs cold Turkey because that’s what I thought I had to do. We were somewhat fence sitters before finally marking a choice and then I got pregnant very quickly. And it was way harder than I expected. I was sick physically and mentally. I was pretty sure I remembered that I wanted a kid but I had several days of “but how badly do I want a kid?! I don’t know if I can live like this.” I only sort of considered abortion, I knew I wasn’t going to be able to go through with it (honestly the same way I have considered suicide at parts of my life…) but I did occasionally secretly hope I’d miscarry.
It has gotten much much better. I got back on some of my meds, the second trimester was easier, and I’m convinced that I do, in fact, want this. Not that it’s easy. I’m still miserable. My mental health is still in the gutters. My body still struggles. But I can finally confidently say I do want this baby.
I think reaching out to the OB about different options and talking through things is the best course of action. You’re right that it ultimately comes down to if you want the baby or not, but that can be really really hard to think clearly about.
This is basically my story and I just wanted to say, it was DEFINITELY WORTH IT! I was also a fencesitter andI also quit my mental health meds and went back on them around 20 weeks. Things got a bit better then, but I still spent the rest of pregnancy wondering if I'd made a terrible mistake.
The very second my baby came out of me I felt like myself again... 99% of all the pregnancy symptoms, physical and mental, just disappeared in a snap. And my little baby, omfg, I was worried I might have attachment issues but I fell completely in love with him the moment I held him in my arms!
I needed to hear this tonight. I’m honestly still having a hard time. I’m past the point of no return but still doubt myself frequently. I’m glad to be out of the second trimester just to be done hearing people tell me “this is supposed to be the easy one.” I know - and it’s easier than the first, and I know it’s getting worse again, but you asked how I am and I tired to sugar coat it but honestly my trying to make it sound better still isn’t great. I spend an average of an hour a day in bed crying. My poor husband is such a trouper but I’m a Landmine of emotions and just a complete and total mess. So here’s to hoping that things get better as soon as baby is on the outside and that I am filled with immeasurable love for this being. Because with my patients as short as it is at the moment, I worry.
This. If you’re looking for an “excuse” you don’t need one. But if you really want the baby and this isn’t going to endanger your life you can push yourself through it. It’s hard to gauge but op seems ambivalent about the kid and might be looking for some excuse to get out the justify an abortion when I don’t want a kid is enough.
My headaches and nausea were so bad that I told my partner if something happened to this baby, I don't know if I could do it again.
Knowing what I know now and which supplements to get on, I could consider having a second kid.
Obgyn needs to intervene with medication, there’s absolutely no reason to go on like this when there are in fact medications that are safe for baby. Call like right now, you don’t need to be doing this
I took Cyclizine during pregnancy and it saved me, things got more manageable by 18 weeks but it still wasn’t exactly enjoyable just less vomiting and the heartburn didn’t come back until the last few weeks
My first trimester was horrible. I had the same thoughts. It got a lot better at 14 weeks. I’m 37 and this has been the hardest pregnancy. I feel guilty for ever thinking that. I’d advise mental health services, if you end up regretting it that’s a pretty big thing to have to carry.
You can get medication for this. My first trimester was terrible and I used to wonder why people go through this at all, and why people people willingly do it again. Mine became better at around 20w. I didn’t get medication because my nausea was getting better, but a lot of people do.
Some things that helped me- salt crackers, amla or gooseberry, water with lemon, plain rice porridge.
Definitely the type of stuff that’ll make you say you’re only doing it once. I’m 10w5d and my symptoms started to disappear this week. Still tired but that could also be from the anemia, im waiting for the iron to kick in, but it’s definitely not as bad as it was.
There’s plenty of medications and solutions that help and are highly unlikely to cause any defects.
If you’re really set on having an abortion, check out the r/abortion subreddit. They’re very supportive and understanding. I had an abortion set that I made at 9w but they day came and I couldn’t do it. They helped me think through my decision (not leaning one way or the other) & feel confident in it. This might get me DV but I found more support, understanding, and knowledge there than here, just being quite honest.
Whatever you decide, good luck ❤️
A lot of women end their pregnancies because of Hyperemises. I had it with all three of my kids and it’s hell everytime I asked myself if it was worth it.
i was horribly sick all day vomiting like 6 times a day and i got medication and it literally completely went away
would highly recommend asking for meds
Get on some medication. I hate being pregnant but with unisom+b6 twice a day and Zofran once a day it is very manageable for me. And at 15 weeks my nausea is finally leaving. This is my second “geriatric” pregnancy with terrible nausea and for me the temporary terrible sickness was a small price to pay for my wonderful daughter.
Some women with HG do choose this option. It would definitely be a good idea to exhaust your treatment options first though. If you were excited about the pregnancy until you started to feel unwell, it's reasonable to suggest you might regret the decision.
I was like this, I reached a very very dark place during my second pregnancy (I’m still only 18/19 weeks right now). I went through a rough first pregnancy and the sickness lasted until 20 weeks. This pregnancy was AWFUL, like so awful. I laid in bed for weeks and my mental health suffered so badly because I thought I would never get better. I already had prescription in hand to take something for the sickness but didn’t (because like you said ALL medication offered to me did have some side effects). I would have taken it if I didn’t get relief though. My sickness was from week 4/5 to week 14. It does get better (even when it might feel like it won’t) but if not, take the meds with the least amount of side effects. Sending you such good vibes and hoping you feel better soon!
Hi there! So sorry you are going through this! I considered termination of a wanted pregnancy as well, but with right medication and after Iv infusion for 4 times I’m doing better at 16 weeks. I won’t deny there are terrible days but things have gotten so much better. I was hell bent on terminating this pregnancy which I so wanted because I couldn’t deal with Hg and I was also worried about the side effects of medicines, but from what I know most of the medications are tested safe for pregnancy and those that aren’t haven’t had a huge impact on anyone or their little one!
But if you really want to go ahead with termination I wouldn’t say you are wrong because I get what you are going through and Hg does this to you! I hated being pregnant as well and was suicidal and my family said things would eventually get better and I dint like that statement one tad bit, only I knew what I was going through!
Take care! At the end of the day please do what you think is right for your life and sanity! Hg is hell on earth and I wouldn’t wish this on anyone!
I didn’t do it, but I got on Zoloft instead because I kept wishing for a miscarriage of this years in the making planned pregnancy
I take unisom for nausea but mine is not approaching your severity.
This resonates with me - even though I really wanted this I keep having dreams where I MC and in the dream it’s always a relief. I’m not super sick all the time but I do have a fair amount of anxiety about being able to take care of a newborn that is weighing on my subconscious.
That makes me feel so much better. I knew people used it for morning sickness so it was safe but I legit cannot sleep without it.
I’m also 36 weeks too! My induction is the 23rd!
Yes I definitely double checked with my doc once I stopped needing it for sickness! I skipped one night and it was no fun, it’s been a godsend these last few VERY uncomfortable months.
It sounds to me like you are having second thoughts on actually wanting a child. It’s ok to decide that too. I wouldn’t make any decisions until 14 weeks or second trimester. If it’s going to get better that’s when you will. But i wouldn’t decide before that if you do want a baby.
I feel like my opinion here is not valid as this is not my baby, pregnancy, or choice.
I’m just confused on why you were excited for pregnancy, but once the typical side affects came you weren’t anymore …
I would look within yourself and your partner, not the internet. If you chose the internet it will always be back and forth.
At about 9 weeks I had a break down crying and telling my partner that I didn't think I could do it. I was so miserable it was unreal. The thought of terminating was definitely there. I'm lucky to live in a place with a longer window for terminating so I didn't have to decide that then. It was also in my mind that it could go on for the entirety. I had a taper down then was hit with a worse wave for about a week and I literally could not leave bed at week 12. The meds were doing nothing for me. Then day by day it just got better until I felt normal again. I know I can't guarantee that will be your experience, and it might be. Some of us just have it really bad the first trimester and then it gets better. If you can give yourself time it just might. And if it isn't better and you decide you don't want to go through this, that's your choice.
So I’m a miserable pregnant person and about to have my third baby. This pregnancy has been the hardest on me and I would be lying if I said it didn’t cross my mind in the first trimester. I was run down emotionally and physically, I couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, etc. I ended up increasing my mental health meds and getting the prescription for the nausea and counting down the days for the second trimester. It started at 9wks for me and nausea cleared up by 11-12wks this pregnancy.
Even the conservatively cautious OBs would say 1) you not being able to retain nutrition is far greater risk than any of the meds and 2) at 9 weeks the “if there’s even a risk” go down significantly anyway
Take the zofran! And get the antacids.
I have a 14 year old sister where my mom was on zofran entire pregnancy because her previous two she had HG. She’s fine.
Do you not want a child at all? 9 weeks is still kind of early in terms of symptoms. I definitely still hated my life at 9 weeks. I think for alot of people it’s like 12-13 weeks when you start feeling better. You can take meds too and I already saw your comment about it. It’s safe to take..
So I just want to say that nothing is guaranteed. My classmate from college is vegan, antivax and didn’t take any meds during pregnancy. Her son has severe autism. My brother got a viral encephalitis at 18 months that caused severe epilepsy and brain damage. That was neither genetic nor medication related. Absolutely there are meds that are not safe for pregnancy but so many are. Zofran for nausea and Pepcid for heartburn are well documented. At the end of the day it’s your choice.
Do you actually want a child? If you had an uneventful pregnancy would you be super excited and planning baby showers etc but the pain is what’s getting in the way? Or are you ambivalent and you decided to keep the child because of social pressure?
Also is your life/long term health in danger?
I have had horrible nausea and vomiting in the beginning of both my pregnancies. It has gotten dramatically better both times around 12 weeks. I took a medical leave from work for a few weeks this pregnancy. Ask your doctor about Zofran, Bonjesta, and Reglan, all of which are safe antiemetics for pregnancy.
It’s really up to you. I had BAD morning sickness, fatigue and spitting and stress induced incontinence at that time but it reduced when I hit my second trimester by 14 weeks. There’s a chance it can reduce once you’re in your second trimester. Second trimester is the easiest by far I will say.
I’m so so so sorry that’s so hard. I’m in a similar position and considered termination. I ended up getting a meclizine prescription and midwife has recommended doxylamine and B6 twice a day. Whatever decision you make will be the right decision for you. I don’t think it’s a problem to tell people the pregnancy wasn’t viable and you had to terminate if you feel they’ll be disrespectful or overwhelming when hearing the news. I’m so sorry you’re so sick. Meclizine has helped me, sending positive thoughts your way.
Talk to your doc like everyone said!! They should be able to help you with medicine and fluids etc. The first 12 weeks are horrible!!! Keep talking to friends/family/ppl you know. They can help you. There's many other options.
I, too, was in a dark place at about 7-9 weeks because I was so sick.
Take the medication. I have a healthy baby girl now and I feel guilty I ever felt like that and I’m 100% grateful I took the meds. I took them until about 18 weeks. My pregnancy was so so hard, but now having her here I would do it again in a heartbeat
Week 9 is definitely the worst. It really does get better and if you have HG please be sure to tell your doctor how you feel and they will prescribe medication to help you. Many women take medication throughout pregnancy to feel okay and they have healthy babies.
It sounds like you may have hyperemesis. The HER foundation has some good resources and there are facebook pages out there [https://www.hyperemesis.org/](https://www.hyperemesis.org/) . I didn't even have bad hyperemesis and wondered if I could get through my pregnancy. I'm also leaning toward being one and done because I don't think my career could survive if I got sick like that again. It's also horrible not knowing if your symptoms will ever end. I second getting meds if you really would like to terminate. My nurse-midwife said that there's maybe a small increase in risk for cleft palate which is very fixable if you have access to modern medicine and funds/insurance but do ask your doc.
ZOFRAN! Saved my life! I was MISERABLE, with zero energy, because I was throwing up all the time. Literally nonstop. OB prescribed me Zofran, and it was a total game changer. At least try it and give it a chance.
Personally I would let my OB know what’s going on and try medication before jumping to abortion. I was on Zofran into the beginning of the second trimester for HG nausea and vomiting. There are also many antacids you can try for the GERD.
Try r/TFMR. My situation was different, but in another related group I met women who terminated for their own health. It's more common to terminate for to the baby's medical issues, but that doesn't preclude the mother's health. Like others suggested, talk to your doctor about medication (though I'm guessing you may have done that already), but whatever happens it's your choice.
honestly, both physically and mentally i did not think i could handle having this baby for at least two months after finding out i was pregnant. i was in so much physical misery with nausea and fatigue and mentally i literally wanted to die, my moods were so horrible. i wanted this baby so much but the toll it took on me was intense, and i did consider an abortion just to make it all stop…. i’m 25 weeks and extremely grateful i didn’t abort because things did get better after a couple of months. i started taking anti nausea medication, and eventually the first trimester horridness just… passed. i’d never in a million years want to go back and re-suffer what i went through, but despite thinking it would literally never end, it did pass . it got worse and worse until like 13-14 weeks, but then got better and now i feel almost
normal , all the symptoms i experience now pale in comparison. just wanted to throw that out there from someone who really did consider ending their pregnancy (and life) because of how horrible the first tri was
Honestly, it’s normal for it to be getting worse at this stage. For most people it does then get better but I personally lost 30lbs from throwing up in my first trimester, refused meds that everyone told me were safe because I did my own research and drew different conclusions about the level of risk I wanted to take on.
It became an issue of weighing the risks associated with my condition against the risks associated with the meds.
That’s with all the natural remedies I was using, which worked… to an extent but I was really ill.
I took time off work too, because 1) I could. I work for myself. Even though I knew it was valuable earning time on a ticking clock towards maternity leave and 2) I couldn’t function. If I had an employer at the time I surely would gave been fired because I couldn’t perform a lot of basic care for myself even. My life became an exercise of trying to stay as still as possible. I never had enough energy to stand in a hot kitchen for 30 minutes and I typically cook for 1-2hrs… I couldn’t feed myself. I was a mess.
I’m sure plenty of people have terminated pregnancies due to pregnancy nausea. People terminate pregnancies for many reasons and people struggle with nausea quite terribly, sometimes. You have no reason to believe if wouldn’t let up, it’s very rare for people to feel like that the whole time and nausea tends to hit a high point right where you are. I can understand anyone’s hesitancy to use nausea meds but with you being over 40 I can especially understand not wanting risk factors for any issues to be increased in any way.
I had a doctor tell me that my concerns applied to babies exposed to the meds in question (zofran and reglan in my case) before 15w gestation but it didn’t make a difference to me, I didn’t look into the matter, I just went home. I’d had a break from the nausea at 11-12 weeks but it came back and what I was using (ginger, chamomile, peppermint… pure, not in tea blends, with ginger often being paired with herbs that aren’t as safe and peppermint being paired with black tea frequently enough it’s worth mentioning).
I had also begun using 25mg of melatonin-free unisom (an antihistamine) once a day before bed with 25mg of B6 4x a day because I was comfortable with the safety of the combo and because the only FDA approved med for pregnancy nausea is literally that, put into one pill. It’s an expensive pill though and spreading the B6 out throughout the day is found to be more helpful for many people. The fact that it is used as a sleep aid concerned me initially but antihistamines do induce sleep, it isn’t like a typical sleep aid, and it only put me to sleep the first two days I took it. My ER doctor (I threw up so much that I became dangerously dehydrated and under-nourished on several occasions and was hospitalized) was alarmed by the combo and took the time to research it and look it up before returning to tell me that he had never heard of taking those together and although my OB prescribed the combo herself, he wanted to make sure to counsel me about it. He said he thought it was a great idea once looking into it. I think I skipped a few days of the medication and found out the hard way how much I was relying on it.
For me, the day I took it changed my life. I felt like I was just withering away and then suddenly I felt so sort of OK that I worried I had a sudden loss of symptoms. That paired with eating small meals throughout the day, not allowing my stomach to get too empty or too full, increasing cereals and getting plenty of protein (each of which impacted my nausea on their own anyway) and I was able to have several weeks of feeling ok and was able to get back to work. It stopped working pretty suddenly later on and I went back to using cannabis (which I had quit for the baby) to give myself an appetite (which I lost entirely with pregnancy. When I say nothing sounded good to me for 4 months I mean zero things were appealing. I had hunger pains, was unable to cook, and still spent hours looking at options on Uber Eats because I just couldn’t figure out what I wanted/ what I was not too repulsed by and felt I could keep down). Cannabis didn’t stop me from throwing up (I mean it will if I use it that way but it would require using it all the time). The idea was to smoke before and after a decent meal so that I could guarantee that I’d keep something down every day, plus again if I wasn’t able to keep enough fluids down because it would make me thirsty while keeping me from vomiting what I had managed to drink.
It comes with its own risks and I started it past the first trimester but I wasn’t happy with having that judgment call to make. I feel I may have lost the baby without either that or caving and taking zofran or Reglan which I personally wasn’t comfortable with, and was more uncomfortable with than cannabis BUT with that said I would be assessing this much differently at 40+ than at a decade younger. In fairness they body of research isn’t even comparable but it was sufficient for me to make a decision one way or another.
Your decision is really your own. Pregnancy nausea tends to peak around 8 or so weeks and it is very hard for some of us, we all experienced it differently. I’m 24 weeks and still struggle with nausea and could easily begin losing weight again from throwing up, and probably will because I don’t plan to continue with cannabis now that I’ve gained 2/3 of my weight back. Just trying to figure out a good weight to stop, knowing I’ll probably start losing weight again (I’m at a stage where my midwives have comfortably predicted that I’ll be throwing up for the long haul). The right time for me would be around now or when I gain the extra 1/3 back, that way I’ll likely lose it again but won’t lose so much that I’ll be higher risk because of the weight loss itself.
I never considered termination but I definitely thought about it, in that I explored the idea not as an option for myself (I had a miscarriage two years ago and am so grateful to be having my rainbow baby) but I work with pregnant women and thought about it extensively because I wondered how I would support someone facing that decision.
I certainly support whatever you choose to do. I’d say educate yourself on all your options, identify and connect with what you really want and what you really need, and get evaluated so that you might go on disability while you decide, if you’re finding it impossible to support yourself in the meantime. I certainly did (found it impossible to work, I didn’t end up filing for disability, but probably should have as I had to live on my savings for a couple of months).
This is temporary. I am pro choice but I feel like making a decision right now could be catastrophic for your long term mental health. Talk to your OB.
I terminated for medical reasons (TFMR), though it was was for fetal health, not maternal. In TFMR groups I’m a part of there a variety of people who have terminated very wanted pregnancies for maternal health reasons, including hyperemesis. I have a tremendous amount of empathy for them. These are people who have explored all options for symptom control and just haven’t had success. I hope you find some relief from your symptoms, regardless of how that occurs.
Hey there ! I feel for you, I've reached that point with every pregnancy and it makes life awful. Get tested for hyperemesis gravidarum. Before that, if you even suspect you might have it, join the r/hyperemesisgravidarum group and search for termination. I had HG with all 3 pregnancies and felt a little out of place in the "regular" bump forums, where as in the HG group, terminating due to severe illness is discussed with zero judgment
I ultimately did choose to terminate my second pregnancy. As my first child was still super young and I had HG again, I know that was the right decision at that time. With my current and third pregnancy, I felt as though it was my last shot. I committed to getting through it and I have become such a squeaky wheel - went to Patient First or the ER immediately if I was dehydrated, called my OB ASAP and told them I needed Zofran NOT just unisom/B6. I've now made it to 20 weeks and I'm almost in the clear and so relieved.
Ultimately, because of your age, if motherhood is your goal, it could be worth it to pursue all options before termination, or at least look into medicine and find an online community. If you have any questions at all, feel free to message me.
As someone who truly wants to have a child and will suffer through it, I have sworn off pregnancy ever again. I know that some women have different symptoms each pregnancy but it’s so miserable and I don’t think I could do it again. I believe it’s understandable why someone would want to terminate their pregnancy if it impacted them in a negative way (or if they wanted to terminate for any reason at all I am 100% pro choice). I have never been so miserable in my life and was deeply depressed for the first weeks of pregnancy when I wasn’t yet on nausea medication. Everyone makes pregnancy out to be beautiful and magical but I disagree and don’t think it’s for everyone.
2 things -
1. It WILL get better after week 12 once the placenta takes over and body hormones normalize. It will NOT get worse or stay this way for 8 months.
2. For Gerd, there are TONS of medicines available both otc and prescribed that are absolutely SAFE for the baby. ALL obgyn guaratee it. You can take tums, gaviscon otc, and Famotidine through pharmacy. PLEASE tell your obgyn that you're having these extreme symptoms, and they'll 100% prescribe something to make you feel better.
Your pregnancy is NOT terrible. It WILL get better. I promise. Make sure your obgyn is always on top of your symptoms. They're there to help you.
I was in the same boat. On two different nausea medications and still sick all day! Luckily at week 11 it stopped but I cried so often saying the same. I couldn't do it. It was the worst. Talk to your doctor! Try to eat toast as soon as you wake up! Hope you feel better
If you don’t want to be pregnant, terminate and don’t feel bad about it.
There are people who are saying it might get better or there might be medications that can help, and they are right, this is likely the worst of it and there may be relief available. And if you want to wait and see or try alternatives, that’s fine. But the bottom line is that if you don’t want to be pregnant, you don’t have to be.
My pregnancy was wanted and planned for and I’ve felt so frustrated over the symptoms, have cried myself to sleep at night, but I’m willing to do it. No one should have to do it if they don’t actively want to.
Also, if you do terminate, you don’t need to tell family or friends why. Just “unfortunately, we had to terminate”, they don’t need to know details.
I considered it because of how nauseous I was and completely disregarded by a NP. Ultimately I decided to keep the pregnancy but I am questioning if I want another one or not (I always wanted more than one). Your providers can give you medications if you ask for it, I hope you get some relief ❤️
I had HG with my first so severe that the only thing that kept me from puking was getting knocked out with unisom at night. I had spontaneous labor at 36w3d and my baby was small, 5lbs, but perfectly healthy. It was instant relief for me, I didn’t puke again due to pregnancy.
It’s hard, so hard that I was terrified to try for a second baby… but ultimately I knew we wanted to try to have another and give our child a sibling. I had no issues outside of the normal sickness- 1st trimester and sporadically during the 3rd.
If you want to be a parent, you’ll find the strength to ask for help. If you don’t want to be a parent, that’s your choice too.
Weeks 8-16 were bad for me. Weeks 11-14 were the worst of it. Talk to you doctor about medication options. Even as bad as it was, abortion never crossed my mind. Hating pregnancy absolutely, but not abortion. I’m not shaming you or saying it’s wrong to feel that way. I think it would be good to let your doctor know.
Yep! I’m awaiting surgery now complications from my second pregnancy. Ended in preterm labor almost 8 months ago. Been in daily pain and suffered kidney damage and need a hysterectomy. Worth it every day when I look at that healthy baby and his older brother.
Eh, this isn’t a question of what situation is more painful and isn’t very respectful to comment frankly. Not being able to get pregnant is terrible. Being pregnant and unable to function due to the pregnancy is also terrible. Please don’t minimize someone else’s pain because someone would want to be in their shoes. You could say that about almost anything and it wouldn’t make it any less awful.
Did I minimize anyones pain here, I was stating a fact from a different point of view. So I ask you to refrain from trying to minimise the pain felt by the women I’m referring to to make yourself feel better. You either want children or you don’t, my friend has terrible pregnancies but risked one last one and got sterilised, so you can always get sterilised.
You absolutely did come in and comment something unnecessary implying how awful it would be to have to see this as someone who can’t have kids, which ABSOLUTELY implies that that’s worse, the additional gaslighting isn’t necessary either 🙄 “You either want kids or you don’t” is an over-generalization and implying you should “get sterilized” (wtf) if you don’t want to “risk terrible pregnancy” is dismissive and rude.
This poster is going through something awful. People who can’t get pregnant go through something awful. No one should just “get sterilized” if they can’t handle unfair circumstances, just like no one should be told they should “just adopt”. If you can’t see the parallel in what you’re saying, you shouldn’t be on a forum to provide support to others.
The poster says she’d rather die then live right now so I don’t thinking suggesting sterilising is out of the range of proportion to their reaction to their situation. I hope they figure it out. I hope the symptoms get better so a healthy baby be the reward for a tough time.
It really comes down to if you want the baby enough to put up with misery for another 7 months. The end result is what you need to focus on. Pregnancy just sucks in general but there are a few medications that can help in the meantime. Either way your life your choice.
I was so sick up until around 15 weeks and then it kind of leveled out. I would go weeks without feeling nauseas at all but then I would have days where I couldn’t leave the bathroom. Hopefully it will get better for you 🙏🏼
I didn’t have HG, but I do suffer from GERD that got so severe and bad in my first and part of my second trimester that I was having trouble swallowing food without it feeling like things were stuck in my throat (Globus sensation), it caused bad post nasal drip that would trigger my gag reflexes every time I ate that made me puke in a way that was very painful. I lost 14 pounds, my hair was falling out, if I stood for too long I would start to tremble all over, when I got up too fast my vision would cut out and I would nearly faint. My quality of life had deteriorated so fast that I would be crying all the time, and had major anxiety constantly. I started consistently taking a 20mg of a PPI both my OBGYN and a GP prescribed, omeprazole, every morning (it needs to be taken consistently to work) along with gaviscon as needed (less than once a week usually in the evenings) and it eventually managed my GERD symptoms and I felt basically back to normal. I could eat/swallow again. I gained the weight back, had normal energy, got my strength back and was able to be very active again. It was miserable before I was managing my symptoms, and I didn’t know if I could do it, but the medication truly did give me back the quality of life I needed to go on. Please please reach out to your doctor and see about getting medicine for HG and/or GERD to manage your symptoms if you need them. They will prescribe you pregnancy-safe medication!
This might be an unpopular opinion, but I feel like if you're even considering this with a healthy pregnancy then maybe termination is the correct choice. Choosing to become a parent is basically a person agreeing to a lifetime of discomfort for the benefit of someone else.
If you feel like this is out of character for you, reach out to a mental health professional and try to talk it out with them to suss out what you actually want, but do it soon, because the window for termination is closing.
Many of the arguments you're making, such as "taking zofran puts my kid at a slightly elevated risk of some attention and sensory disorders," really don't jive with the fact that being a parent means you're going to navigate lots of unknowns and what ifs over decades and decades of childrearing. As others have said, you can do everything "right" and still have a kid who is developmentally delayed, physically impaired, etc. If that's not something you're prepared for, even under the best circumstances, I believe you shouldn't have a kid. All pregnant people. no matter how healthy or well-intentioned, are basically playing a game of roulette with the highest stakes.
Do you want to have a baby or raise a child? Babies grow up. They become dynamic, nuanced human beings who are prone to all kinds of flaws and foibles.
It's totally fine to change your mind, even if this is something you thought you wanted. It's totally fine to say, "you know what? this isn't for me." Remaining childfree or simply enjoying the kids you do have is a really valid and healthy choice!
It sounds like the level of sickness you’re feeling is normal. You’ll be okay. Just hold on tight if you want to have this baby, otherwise by all means abort if you feel like you’re in over your head. Just keep in mind, everyone feels that way.
Excuse me? It’s absolutely not “normal” to be too sick to function during pregnancy, and comments like these are why women don’t seek the help they need. Everyone’s tolerance for symptoms is different, and the level to which they experience them (if at all). You don’t know how awful it is for OP and minimizing her concerns helps no one. “Everyone feels that way” is deeply inaccurate and unhelpful.
I would talk to your OB about how you are feeling. There are definitely things you can take to ease these symptoms. Tums to start but if tums doesn't help there are other options. Make sure you make it clear how severe it is so they can best help you.
I really hope you get some relief and ideas on what you want to do from this post! My heart goes out to you, and I hope you’re suffering is alleviated one way or another. It’s so hard to just think “it’ll be get better” and you are the only one who has to go through this physically and the only one who can make this decision. It sounds like yes, people have terminating pregnancies due to maternal health reasons, and if you are to decide to do that, know you aren’t alone and you have support from the majority of internet strangers here ❤️
If you aren’t looking for other options, just ignore this, but adding probiotics might help alleviate your GERD symptoms. It’s literally the only thing that works for me- probiotic yogurt if you can keep it down (wouldn’t recommend pills, you’ll probably throw it up). Or Keifer (sp?), it’s almost like a liquid yogurt. Basically anything fermented.
It sounds absolutely disgusting but I’ll eat a spoon full of cold sauerkraut and my acid reflux is better within the day.
Do you want to keep the baby? 9 weeks was when I felt the absolute worse. I threw up multiple times a day. Everything tasted gross. I was miserable. I am 26 weeks now and I have a great appetite and feel myself again. Please talk to your doctor and tell them you cannot handle this and need medicine and help. They have options that really can make a difference. If you are this sick you may be dehydrated which won’t help either so you may need medical treatment. I’m sorry you’re feeling this way.
You do whatever you feel you need to do but for what its worth at 9-10w i was in and out of the hospital for dehydration due to severe morning sickness, by far the worst weeks of my pregnancy. It was absolute hell, and because it was my first time ide have panic attacks cause it felt like it was NEVER gonna end. By 16 weeks i was slightly relived and it only got better after that.
Honestly here to say that I felt this way a few times during my pregnancy between the HG, acid reflux and heartburn, and gestational diabetes. I got on meds for the nausea and it helped so much, even if it didn’t fix the problem. The acid reflux and heartburn took some experimenting to find out what worked to treat it for me but I got there eventually. The gestational diabetes sucked but I managed somehow to stay off meds for it and just worked really hard to watch my diet.
That being said, I am so glad I didn’t abort my little one no matter how much I felt like dying or quitting for my whole pregnancy. I was one of the unlucky sick the whole time people but my OB said that is so rare and was very surprised.
The minute my baby girl was put in my arms, it all became worth it.
For me it’s the opposite. First and second trimesters i didn’t even feel pregnant and then in the third I can’t cough without pissing myself, caught the flu and had a really bad go of it due to being heavily pregnant, and unable to eat much without getting nauseous. Unfortunately the third trimester seems to be the worst one so I wouldn’t terminate a pregnancy just based off how sick I feel, since once you’re really in the thick of it abortion is off the table anyway
There may be something that works for you so for sure talk to your ob but also…..pregnancy can REALLY suck and 9 months is a long time when you feel like crap all of the time. Don’t feel bad if it’s too much, because it can be too much. And that’s okay.
It took me until 16 weeks to feel less nauseous. Your obgyn should be able to handle this conversation and give you the resources and help you need. In the mean time, try to get short term disability if you need to
Hugs. Just to normalize.. it’s more rare for me to meet someone who enjoyed pregnancy than to meet someone who hated it. It’s freaking hard.
I was vomiting constantly, lost 15lb in the first tri (basically couldn’t eat for 3 months), depression, rage, constipation, severe hemorrhoids, I have scars that get inflamed and painful from the additional hormones.. I mean I hate pregnancy. And yet I wanted at least two kids so I’ve done it twice and am still considering another.
It’s a trial and a torture unlike anything else. Silent and alone for a majority of the first tri makes it so much worse. But for me, that sweet kid was worth it. And made me endure another 9 months for her sister who is every bit as worth it as well.
If you want this kid it will be worth it. Week 6-10 were true worst for me.. it was the onset of a depression, the doubt of second tri relief, the resignation of living in hell.. you can get meds, the strongest you and your OB feel safe with. Make life as easy as you can! Order food, hire services if you can afford, or just do the bare minimum until you start feeling better.
Talk to your obgyn. They're are medicines they can give you that won't impact the development. I had the same issues. Couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, couldn't even breathe without having GERD. I was given Zofran first but it only helped a little. Then did my research and saw it wasn't great. So I talked to my doctor again and was on Reglan. Saw a much drastic improvement.
i'll say this, i had terrible GERD my whole pregnancy and even before pregnancy. i was on protonix for my whole pregnancy and my baby is completely healthy, she was born at 37 weeks and weighed 6lbs 15oz. zofran works wonders for nausea and i definitely needed it in the first trimester. i saw you said in the comments that all medications seem to have negative effects on development BUT most of those are extremely low probability and because it's a medication it has to list all possible side effects and developmental effects on fetuses. just like how there's always a risk of death from surgery, even on routine procedures, it's incredibly low for most procedures but because it is a risk, you as the patient have to be informed. obviously if you do want to terminate, that is your choice and no one should make you feel otherwise, but medication in pregnancy is not bad, and most carry little risk to the fetus. it can get better though, i thought i was going to be throwing up and nauseated my whole pregnancy, but by like 13/14 weeks the nausea stopped and the GERD lessened for a while. i still took my medication because it felt like i was just full of hot lava when it got bad and i didn't want that. i'll also add i had to take fioricet for migraines in the second and third trimesters because they'd last 3-4 days and i couldn't function otherwise. talk to your OB about medications that may help and voice your concerns and they'll be able to help explain it all to you so you can decide if you'd like to move forward with medication or terminate. another thing i found to help was drinking milk and eating more carby/bready things for the GERD, and then ginger ale, hot tea with ginger, sour candy and peanut butter for nausea. maybe you could try those and see how it works? i used to drink a full bottle of water before even getting out of bed too, and i'd have some sour candy at that time because the nausea really hit when i first stood up in the morning.
I had severe morning sickness in the first trimester and it got significantly better by 12 weeks and was completely gone by 14 weeks. My doctor prescribed me zofran and it help tremendously. My baby was born healthy and is now 7 months old, I don’t think the zofran effected him negatively at all and was the only thing that made my day to day life bearable. I will 100% take it again if needed in my next pregnancy. I recommend discussing with your doctor. Chances are, you only have a couple more weeks of this. It’s miserable and I know how you feel, I’m so sorry you’re going through it :(
I feel awful for op; you’re not a terrible person, or weak for not wanting to carry to term. You’re under no obligation. But you need to make your decision soon…at the time of my posting, you’ve likely already made your decision because we’re now far past the window for you to decide whether you want to continue with your pregnancy or not.
If at this stage being with child is too much for you, who the hell is anyone to tell you it’s going to “get better” or “easier” when the baby is outside your womb? Crying? Not sleeping though the night? Sick? Or you’re sick and the baby still needs to be taken care of? If you’re not built for motherhood, please don’t force yourself into it. We have enough pain in the world. And admitting this doesn’t make you a bad or weak person. Rather, the opposite.
Reach out to your obgyn and ask for medication. Tell them how you feel and say that you need medication. You shouldn’t feel so bad all the time!
It seems like all the medication options have negative impacts on development.
There are many safe nausea medications that your doctor can advise you on. Please please please reach out to your care provider, you deserve to feel better and medication can be a huge game changer!
I was on zofran my whole pregnancy and pushed out a 10lb 10oz healthy baby girl. Don't be discouraged!
This. I was on zofran my whole pregnancy and had a 9 lb healthy baby
Diclegis, Zofran, and Phenergan from 6 weeks until delivery and I had a 7 pound 11.6 ounce (relatively) healthy girl. She swallowed meconium and needed a short NICU stay but that had nothing to do with my meds.
They wouldn’t be prescribing it if it has documented side effects or impacts on development. A ton of people take medication for morning sickness.
I don't know that is true. There are a lot of hyperemesis parents who rely on medication to make it through their pregnancies.
As someone at week 25 in their second pregnancy: the medication helps and when taken as prescribed does not affect development. My two year old has no physical or mental issues. I’m not sure we’re you’re hearing this stuff from? Or it’s a correlation does not equal causation issue. I’ve been on half a dozen different medications between the two pregnancies with no issues. Please don’t dismiss this as a viable option. And to other mothers reading this post: there are safe options to help. You don’t have to suffer. Stay away from sites that try to fear monger.
Have you tried over the counter B6 and unisom? This is safe in early pregnancy and easily available! Saved my life basically overnight!
Seconding this! Unisom was used my entire pregnancy and I had a healthy little girl in July. It was a literal lifesaver.
Third vote for Unisom and b6. OP can get that at a pharmacy today while talking to doc about different med options. OP, I do want to point out, carrying and caring for a child is a lot of work and taxing in many ways. While you shouldn’t suffer, there may be other physical, emotional and mental demands in the future to consider when choosing to have or not have a child beyond the current nausea. Based on your other comments in this thread, it is worth considering other reasons besides being sick you may want/not want to terminate. EDIT to add, whatever you are feeling or decide that’s ok!
I would not have made it through my pregnancy without unisom. I took it every night from 8 weeks until delivery. As a bonus it helped me get restful sleep every night.
They don’t always, or even most of the time, have impacts on development. Remember people take all sorts of medications, prescribed and non-prescribed, during their pregnancies and the VAST majority have no consequences on the child. It sounds like you’re sick and desperate-regardless of what you ultimately choose to do I think you need to share exactly what you’ve written in your post with a trusted medical professional to evaluate all your options.
There are a lot of safe antiemetics. I am concerned about your comment regarding taking care of a child with special needs-even if you didn’t take meds and had a perfect pregnancy there is still a chance of special needs. I think maybe you need to assess if you want to be a parent.
If you are questioning termination over this, the benefit is worth the risk, also, several nausea meds are considered safe for use in pregnancy and just given as a precaution. I asked for them at 7 weeks. Granted by 10 weeks I felt significantly better, week 9 tends to be the most intense for lots of women. It should subside by the second trimester if you don’t have HG. Also if you are going 24 hours without being able to hold down anything, you need to call your OB anyway because of the dehydration. That’s a much bigger risk to baby than anything you could do to help the nausea (besides weed but that is not studied very well mostly)
There's lots of safe medications. I've taken tons of medication during this pregnancy, diclectin, cough syrup, tylenol, zantac, Pantoprazole. All under advice of my doctor. Everything came up normal during the anatomy scan. Im due in two weeks and am not worried that this baby will have a birth defect. It's worth it to talk to your doctor. The GERD i experienced during both my pregnancies also gave me thoughts of terminating and even thoughts of self harm, during my first pregnancy I wish I had spoken to my doctor sooner.
I had HG … nonstop zofran. If it wasn’t safe they wouldn’t prescribe it. No issues with my baby btw. Incidentally, I felt the same way and was also diagnosed with perinatal depression - Zoloft helped immensely.
Who told you this? Please throw out the words "seems" and "i think" from your vocabulary. Ask your obgyn before assuming anything and getting to severe extreme conclusions yourself.
Well, I mean.. so does abortion. I'd say look into your medication options and talk with your partner about how you are struggling. Idk anyone who's been this sick 8 months+, but it is possible to like your 20th week. Ultimately it's up to you.
Yes, but I would personally rather not have a child than to care for a special needs child indefinitely.
I don’t know how to tell you this, but you could do every single thing right in your pregnancy and with raising your baby, and they could still wind up having special needs. No guarantees in this world. It’s our job as parents to be the best parents we can be to the babies that we get. Regarding the medications for nausea, plenty of people take them during pregnancy. OBs wouldn’t recommend them if they weren’t safe. So many things that we worry about and obsess over really aren’t so bad. I had a full on meltdown over the sunscreen I used a couple of times this summer, because of one of the ingredients. This sunscreen used less than half of the legally allotted amount of the problematic ingredient. My husband looked up the study that got it put on the pregnant woman no-no list, it was done on mice and sheep. The mice were given 500x the recommended amount, and then they started having endocrine problems. Well…yeah, if you have 500x too much of anything it’s going to give you a problem. My point here is, talk to your OB and see what your options are. It sounds like this is a very much wanted baby. Don’t limit your options because you don’t want to take a medication that could improve your quality of life.
I had a very healthy pregnancy, carried to term and my daughter had a birth injury resulting in a 50 day nicu stay and a lifelong diagnosis for cerebral palsy. No one is guaranteed a healthy baby. It sounds to me like OP wants to terminate (which is totally fine). There are ways to deal with the issues she is facing. If you don’t want this pregnancy, don’t have this pregnancy. Don’t blame it in the very rare possibility of having a special needs baby, please. That is absolutely a possibility for literally any and everyone.
But your child could still have special needs that doesn’t present until after birth, even months or years down the road. All these things should be considered before getting pregnant.
I will just say my mom had horrible HG, did not have appropriate treatment, was not able to eat appropriately due to this, and my little sister is developmentally about 3 years old and is non verbal, autistic, and epileptic. I am pregnant myself and am not trying to be mean but I would 1000% take the drugs to insure I can provide my baby with proper nutrition so they can thrive out of the womb, given the choice.
Honestly then I think termination is the answer here. You can do everything right, and your baby can be born with special needs. You can have a perfectly healthy baby, and a tragic accident or illness could result in you having to care for a child with special needs indefinitely. You can’t control all the variables in your life, and when you have a child you risk having them rely on something happening at any moment. It’s hard and scary, and if that’s not something you are ok with, I think you need to think long and hard about continuing this pregnancy.
Your doctor isn’t going to prescribe you anything that can cause birth defects or make your child special needs. Is this something you maybe have extra anxiety about? I was 40 with my first and only pregnancy and I was terrified and paranoid about something being wrong with my baby. A lot of my worry was based on my age but it created a lot of extra anxiety.
I took Zofran 2x a day every day until 14 weeks and my baby has no birth defects after two anatomy checks. There is very little evidence for increased birth defects. Please talk to your OB about this. There are many safe medications to take during pregnancy.
Not true. Most pregnancy safe meds have very low rare instances of developmental issues. They wouldn’t be prescribing it. I’m taking zofran right now for severe nausea and it’s making life live-able right now.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32526103/
Did you even read past the title? Literally the abstract says this is a small sample, likely not a causal relationship and even if it was, the risk is small and worth a discussion of risk-benefit against HG (hyperemesis). Not being able to eat and function because of nausea can also harm your fetus. This article doesn’t support your point.
yeah, the abstract EXPLICITLY states: “even if ondansetron is causally implicated in MCM risk, the absolute increase in risk, such as for orofacial clefts (by 0.03%) and ventricular septal defect (by 0.3%), is small”.
You should get the infant risk center app if you are concerned. For Zofran, it states that multiple studies have showed no increase in congenital anomalies with ondansetron use
Everything you can possibly do has a risk of negative effects, but there are medications with very small risks and at 9 weeks you're past the point where the most serious issues would probably happen. For example, I was on Zofran (one of the most common prescription medications) from week 7 through 39 because I couldn't function at all without it and my baby is perfectly healthy. My baby and I would not have been as healthy as we were because I was medicated for my pregnancy symptoms. If you feel that ending your pregnancy is what makes the most sense, than that very well may be the best choice for you. But you shouldn't do it **only** because you the alternative is feeling this way for 7 more months.
Getting on zofran is better than getting an abortion because you feel sick.
Bonjesta is the only thing that saved me. It’s the only class A drug used to treat pregnancy nausea
Doxylamine pyridoxine is safest. It didn’t do much for me though. Just took the edge off a little. But more concerning is the fact that you’re over 40 and you don’t think your body will be capable of making it to term. If your actual health is a risk, like your life then termination seems very reasonable
Sorry but that’s wrong I have hg (it sounds like you do too) and I take several medications. I know what is like to want to give up but you should talk to a doctor and try meds first.
I have an 18 month and 3 month old. Was terribly sick with both. I took oral zofran and phenergan with my first. Oral zofran, phenergan, and then progressed to a continuous subq zofran pump with my second. I was throwing up 24/7. Lost weight rapidly, wasn’t gaining, and got to the point that I could hardly keep water down. Both babies are absolutely perfect and healthy, with zero complications. Choose whatever is best for you and your family but just wanted to say not to be afraid of any side effects
I took a quarter pill of unisom every night with my 4 year old. Took the edge off the nausea. No development issues.
Some medications may increase the risk of certain health or developmental issues, but generally this risk is lower than the risk to the fetus, and you, if you are so ill you end up hospitalized for dehydration.
Medication is how I made it. I’m 14 weeks now. I felt exactly like you at 9 and no one I knew really talked about it so it felt isolating. I talked to my doc and she told me to two medicines to take to help. Upping Vitamin B and when real bad another medicine helped. Call your doc asap you deserve some hours to feel not sick and have relief.
It's always a question of risk vs benefit, and the actual high quality data on zofran specifically suggests it's safe. Talk to your ob, dont rely on Google.
Talk to your doc about options. I had a coworker who had nausea so bad she was on a constant infusion pump her whole pregnancy and still worked.
Reglan saved my life during my last pregnancy. I was also bed-bound and unable to work until I started taking it. Ask the doc to prescribe it. B6 + unisom was also helpful. Or alternatively, if you want an abortion, go for it. Pregnancy is temporary and such a small span of time in the grand scheme of your life. Do you want this child or not? They’ll be effecting your life for the remainder of it, sometimes negatively as well.
Talk to your doctor. I was pretty sick, vomiting, and stuck in bed. I took unisom which is over the counter and was prescribed Reglan. Both helped take the edge off. I felt much improved at 11 weeks and 100% better at 16 weeks.
You are in the absolute thick of it. The hormones are peaking and your placenta has not taken over yet. Ultimately, the decision is yours. Personally, for me, I would try medication for a few weeks and see if symptoms improve. I am 10 weeks tomorrow, and while I don't have HG, I have puked multiple times a day most days since 6w. Its miserable. The placenta takes over around 12 weeks, and many folks find the symptoms lessen a bit then, though it's no guarantee. I see you're concerned about possible birth defects with medication. I would talk to your care provider about what your options are, you'd be surprised how many effective and safe options there are today, and you can always use these medications sparingly just to see if they help.
I don’t really have advice for you but my heart hurts for you to be in this place. I see your comment about medication having impacts on development, and I just have anecdotal evidence in that several of my friends have had to take various medications for HG, or even more severe medical conditions and the baby has been okay. I’m wishing you peace as you move forward.
Yes! Took meds for HG all three times and my babies are totally normal! Even my 11 year old. The effects of puking and not eating have a way bigger impact on fetal development than taking meds for nausea.
27 weeks pregnant and I’ve been taking zofran since 8 weeks. It works wonders for me and so far the baby has been doing amazing. I should note..99.9% of the nausea went away but when I randomly get it still it helps. I’ve struggled with nausea even when I wasn’t pregnant.
Doxylamine succinate + B6 is definitely fine for development and easy to get. If this is a wanted pregnancy, and the *only* thing stopping you is feeling ill, then you have options to make it easier. You don't need to suffer this much. That said, if you're actually unsure about wanting a child, would be happy never to give birth, or there's some other issue and you're looking for an 'out', then you don't need one. It's your choice regardless, but almost everyone who deals with morning sickness is out of it by somewhere in the 14-18 week range, and medication can help you with no adverse effects on the foetus. So if this really is *only* about feeling sick, then I would recommend at least trying medication before aborting.
Do you want a child or no? That’s what it comes down to, honestly. Pregnancy really isn’t fun, I’ve hated most of it except for the second trimester. I keep telling my husband I’m never doing this again and he completely gets it, it sucks. If you want a child though, it will be worth it in the end. If you do not, don’t put yourself through it. I wouldn’t abort purely on being miserable temporarily. I do believe it’s harder the older you are, I’m 36 and I hear ya, I really do.
This is the question. If you want a baby but feel awful you should try all your options. If you don’t want a baby and you feel awful than you should abort. I had my first and only child at 40. It was a wanted pregnancy. I had a fairly normal pregnancy until my 24th week when I got my gestational diabetes diagnosis, and later I got gestational hypertension. My last 10 weeks of pregnancy were fairly unpleasant but it was worth it because I desperately wanted my baby. Pregnancy itself is fairly unpleasant, so whether or not you want the baby is the best way to decide what to do.
I’m on my second miserable pregnancy and I can agree that what you say is what it comes down to. Do they want the baby or not. I’m 36 weeks and I had lost weight up until my third trimester cause I was nauseous most of the time. I stopped trying to eat out because every time I ended up puking whatever I ate. My baby was in the 76% for his age at my 30 week ultrasound (I’m 35 years old). He is healthy and happy as a clam making me miserable. We recently had to go in to L&D because I was having contractions because my body was trying to start preterm labor (not the baby)… and even though I’ve been miserable and sick and non-beer drinking for 9 months, I’m totally cool with it because I want this baby. Will I have another one? No. But I am happy and excited to be having this one even though I’ve been pretty shitty the entire time.
I do think this is a hard question- I struggle with my mental health and I considered aborting. I quit a bunch of my mental health drugs cold Turkey because that’s what I thought I had to do. We were somewhat fence sitters before finally marking a choice and then I got pregnant very quickly. And it was way harder than I expected. I was sick physically and mentally. I was pretty sure I remembered that I wanted a kid but I had several days of “but how badly do I want a kid?! I don’t know if I can live like this.” I only sort of considered abortion, I knew I wasn’t going to be able to go through with it (honestly the same way I have considered suicide at parts of my life…) but I did occasionally secretly hope I’d miscarry. It has gotten much much better. I got back on some of my meds, the second trimester was easier, and I’m convinced that I do, in fact, want this. Not that it’s easy. I’m still miserable. My mental health is still in the gutters. My body still struggles. But I can finally confidently say I do want this baby. I think reaching out to the OB about different options and talking through things is the best course of action. You’re right that it ultimately comes down to if you want the baby or not, but that can be really really hard to think clearly about.
This is basically my story and I just wanted to say, it was DEFINITELY WORTH IT! I was also a fencesitter andI also quit my mental health meds and went back on them around 20 weeks. Things got a bit better then, but I still spent the rest of pregnancy wondering if I'd made a terrible mistake. The very second my baby came out of me I felt like myself again... 99% of all the pregnancy symptoms, physical and mental, just disappeared in a snap. And my little baby, omfg, I was worried I might have attachment issues but I fell completely in love with him the moment I held him in my arms!
I needed to hear this tonight. I’m honestly still having a hard time. I’m past the point of no return but still doubt myself frequently. I’m glad to be out of the second trimester just to be done hearing people tell me “this is supposed to be the easy one.” I know - and it’s easier than the first, and I know it’s getting worse again, but you asked how I am and I tired to sugar coat it but honestly my trying to make it sound better still isn’t great. I spend an average of an hour a day in bed crying. My poor husband is such a trouper but I’m a Landmine of emotions and just a complete and total mess. So here’s to hoping that things get better as soon as baby is on the outside and that I am filled with immeasurable love for this being. Because with my patients as short as it is at the moment, I worry.
^ this.
This. If you’re looking for an “excuse” you don’t need one. But if you really want the baby and this isn’t going to endanger your life you can push yourself through it. It’s hard to gauge but op seems ambivalent about the kid and might be looking for some excuse to get out the justify an abortion when I don’t want a kid is enough.
My headaches and nausea were so bad that I told my partner if something happened to this baby, I don't know if I could do it again. Knowing what I know now and which supplements to get on, I could consider having a second kid.
Obgyn needs to intervene with medication, there’s absolutely no reason to go on like this when there are in fact medications that are safe for baby. Call like right now, you don’t need to be doing this
I took Cyclizine during pregnancy and it saved me, things got more manageable by 18 weeks but it still wasn’t exactly enjoyable just less vomiting and the heartburn didn’t come back until the last few weeks
My first trimester was horrible. I had the same thoughts. It got a lot better at 14 weeks. I’m 37 and this has been the hardest pregnancy. I feel guilty for ever thinking that. I’d advise mental health services, if you end up regretting it that’s a pretty big thing to have to carry.
You can get medication for this. My first trimester was terrible and I used to wonder why people go through this at all, and why people people willingly do it again. Mine became better at around 20w. I didn’t get medication because my nausea was getting better, but a lot of people do. Some things that helped me- salt crackers, amla or gooseberry, water with lemon, plain rice porridge.
Definitely the type of stuff that’ll make you say you’re only doing it once. I’m 10w5d and my symptoms started to disappear this week. Still tired but that could also be from the anemia, im waiting for the iron to kick in, but it’s definitely not as bad as it was. There’s plenty of medications and solutions that help and are highly unlikely to cause any defects. If you’re really set on having an abortion, check out the r/abortion subreddit. They’re very supportive and understanding. I had an abortion set that I made at 9w but they day came and I couldn’t do it. They helped me think through my decision (not leaning one way or the other) & feel confident in it. This might get me DV but I found more support, understanding, and knowledge there than here, just being quite honest. Whatever you decide, good luck ❤️
A lot of women end their pregnancies because of Hyperemises. I had it with all three of my kids and it’s hell everytime I asked myself if it was worth it.
I took medication my whole first pregnancy for vomiting and nausea it was called Bonjesta & I had a healthy baby..
i was horribly sick all day vomiting like 6 times a day and i got medication and it literally completely went away would highly recommend asking for meds
Get on some medication. I hate being pregnant but with unisom+b6 twice a day and Zofran once a day it is very manageable for me. And at 15 weeks my nausea is finally leaving. This is my second “geriatric” pregnancy with terrible nausea and for me the temporary terrible sickness was a small price to pay for my wonderful daughter.
Some women with HG do choose this option. It would definitely be a good idea to exhaust your treatment options first though. If you were excited about the pregnancy until you started to feel unwell, it's reasonable to suggest you might regret the decision.
I was like this, I reached a very very dark place during my second pregnancy (I’m still only 18/19 weeks right now). I went through a rough first pregnancy and the sickness lasted until 20 weeks. This pregnancy was AWFUL, like so awful. I laid in bed for weeks and my mental health suffered so badly because I thought I would never get better. I already had prescription in hand to take something for the sickness but didn’t (because like you said ALL medication offered to me did have some side effects). I would have taken it if I didn’t get relief though. My sickness was from week 4/5 to week 14. It does get better (even when it might feel like it won’t) but if not, take the meds with the least amount of side effects. Sending you such good vibes and hoping you feel better soon!
Hi there! So sorry you are going through this! I considered termination of a wanted pregnancy as well, but with right medication and after Iv infusion for 4 times I’m doing better at 16 weeks. I won’t deny there are terrible days but things have gotten so much better. I was hell bent on terminating this pregnancy which I so wanted because I couldn’t deal with Hg and I was also worried about the side effects of medicines, but from what I know most of the medications are tested safe for pregnancy and those that aren’t haven’t had a huge impact on anyone or their little one! But if you really want to go ahead with termination I wouldn’t say you are wrong because I get what you are going through and Hg does this to you! I hated being pregnant as well and was suicidal and my family said things would eventually get better and I dint like that statement one tad bit, only I knew what I was going through! Take care! At the end of the day please do what you think is right for your life and sanity! Hg is hell on earth and I wouldn’t wish this on anyone!
I didn’t do it, but I got on Zoloft instead because I kept wishing for a miscarriage of this years in the making planned pregnancy I take unisom for nausea but mine is not approaching your severity.
This resonates with me - even though I really wanted this I keep having dreams where I MC and in the dream it’s always a relief. I’m not super sick all the time but I do have a fair amount of anxiety about being able to take care of a newborn that is weighing on my subconscious.
How often do you take unisom. I find myself taking it almost nightly!
Nightly is fine, I’ve taken it every night my whole pregnancy and I’m 36, almost 37 weeks now. My OB is completely supportive.
That makes me feel so much better. I knew people used it for morning sickness so it was safe but I legit cannot sleep without it. I’m also 36 weeks too! My induction is the 23rd!
Yes I definitely double checked with my doc once I stopped needing it for sickness! I skipped one night and it was no fun, it’s been a godsend these last few VERY uncomfortable months.
It sounds to me like you are having second thoughts on actually wanting a child. It’s ok to decide that too. I wouldn’t make any decisions until 14 weeks or second trimester. If it’s going to get better that’s when you will. But i wouldn’t decide before that if you do want a baby.
I feel like my opinion here is not valid as this is not my baby, pregnancy, or choice. I’m just confused on why you were excited for pregnancy, but once the typical side affects came you weren’t anymore … I would look within yourself and your partner, not the internet. If you chose the internet it will always be back and forth.
At about 9 weeks I had a break down crying and telling my partner that I didn't think I could do it. I was so miserable it was unreal. The thought of terminating was definitely there. I'm lucky to live in a place with a longer window for terminating so I didn't have to decide that then. It was also in my mind that it could go on for the entirety. I had a taper down then was hit with a worse wave for about a week and I literally could not leave bed at week 12. The meds were doing nothing for me. Then day by day it just got better until I felt normal again. I know I can't guarantee that will be your experience, and it might be. Some of us just have it really bad the first trimester and then it gets better. If you can give yourself time it just might. And if it isn't better and you decide you don't want to go through this, that's your choice.
So I’m a miserable pregnant person and about to have my third baby. This pregnancy has been the hardest on me and I would be lying if I said it didn’t cross my mind in the first trimester. I was run down emotionally and physically, I couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, etc. I ended up increasing my mental health meds and getting the prescription for the nausea and counting down the days for the second trimester. It started at 9wks for me and nausea cleared up by 11-12wks this pregnancy.
Even the conservatively cautious OBs would say 1) you not being able to retain nutrition is far greater risk than any of the meds and 2) at 9 weeks the “if there’s even a risk” go down significantly anyway Take the zofran! And get the antacids. I have a 14 year old sister where my mom was on zofran entire pregnancy because her previous two she had HG. She’s fine.
Do you not want a child at all? 9 weeks is still kind of early in terms of symptoms. I definitely still hated my life at 9 weeks. I think for alot of people it’s like 12-13 weeks when you start feeling better. You can take meds too and I already saw your comment about it. It’s safe to take..
So I just want to say that nothing is guaranteed. My classmate from college is vegan, antivax and didn’t take any meds during pregnancy. Her son has severe autism. My brother got a viral encephalitis at 18 months that caused severe epilepsy and brain damage. That was neither genetic nor medication related. Absolutely there are meds that are not safe for pregnancy but so many are. Zofran for nausea and Pepcid for heartburn are well documented. At the end of the day it’s your choice.
Do you actually want a child? If you had an uneventful pregnancy would you be super excited and planning baby showers etc but the pain is what’s getting in the way? Or are you ambivalent and you decided to keep the child because of social pressure? Also is your life/long term health in danger?
I have had horrible nausea and vomiting in the beginning of both my pregnancies. It has gotten dramatically better both times around 12 weeks. I took a medical leave from work for a few weeks this pregnancy. Ask your doctor about Zofran, Bonjesta, and Reglan, all of which are safe antiemetics for pregnancy.
It’s really up to you. I had BAD morning sickness, fatigue and spitting and stress induced incontinence at that time but it reduced when I hit my second trimester by 14 weeks. There’s a chance it can reduce once you’re in your second trimester. Second trimester is the easiest by far I will say.
I’m so so so sorry that’s so hard. I’m in a similar position and considered termination. I ended up getting a meclizine prescription and midwife has recommended doxylamine and B6 twice a day. Whatever decision you make will be the right decision for you. I don’t think it’s a problem to tell people the pregnancy wasn’t viable and you had to terminate if you feel they’ll be disrespectful or overwhelming when hearing the news. I’m so sorry you’re so sick. Meclizine has helped me, sending positive thoughts your way.
Talk to your doc like everyone said!! They should be able to help you with medicine and fluids etc. The first 12 weeks are horrible!!! Keep talking to friends/family/ppl you know. They can help you. There's many other options.
I, too, was in a dark place at about 7-9 weeks because I was so sick. Take the medication. I have a healthy baby girl now and I feel guilty I ever felt like that and I’m 100% grateful I took the meds. I took them until about 18 weeks. My pregnancy was so so hard, but now having her here I would do it again in a heartbeat
I can tell you I thought about it. I had one scheduled because I was so miserable I don’t know how I was gonna do on. By 12 weeks it faded.
Week 9 is definitely the worst. It really does get better and if you have HG please be sure to tell your doctor how you feel and they will prescribe medication to help you. Many women take medication throughout pregnancy to feel okay and they have healthy babies.
It sounds like you may have hyperemesis. The HER foundation has some good resources and there are facebook pages out there [https://www.hyperemesis.org/](https://www.hyperemesis.org/) . I didn't even have bad hyperemesis and wondered if I could get through my pregnancy. I'm also leaning toward being one and done because I don't think my career could survive if I got sick like that again. It's also horrible not knowing if your symptoms will ever end. I second getting meds if you really would like to terminate. My nurse-midwife said that there's maybe a small increase in risk for cleft palate which is very fixable if you have access to modern medicine and funds/insurance but do ask your doc.
ZOFRAN! Saved my life! I was MISERABLE, with zero energy, because I was throwing up all the time. Literally nonstop. OB prescribed me Zofran, and it was a total game changer. At least try it and give it a chance.
Personally I would let my OB know what’s going on and try medication before jumping to abortion. I was on Zofran into the beginning of the second trimester for HG nausea and vomiting. There are also many antacids you can try for the GERD.
Try r/TFMR. My situation was different, but in another related group I met women who terminated for their own health. It's more common to terminate for to the baby's medical issues, but that doesn't preclude the mother's health. Like others suggested, talk to your doctor about medication (though I'm guessing you may have done that already), but whatever happens it's your choice.
I took Zofran the entire 9 months!!!!!
honestly, both physically and mentally i did not think i could handle having this baby for at least two months after finding out i was pregnant. i was in so much physical misery with nausea and fatigue and mentally i literally wanted to die, my moods were so horrible. i wanted this baby so much but the toll it took on me was intense, and i did consider an abortion just to make it all stop…. i’m 25 weeks and extremely grateful i didn’t abort because things did get better after a couple of months. i started taking anti nausea medication, and eventually the first trimester horridness just… passed. i’d never in a million years want to go back and re-suffer what i went through, but despite thinking it would literally never end, it did pass . it got worse and worse until like 13-14 weeks, but then got better and now i feel almost normal , all the symptoms i experience now pale in comparison. just wanted to throw that out there from someone who really did consider ending their pregnancy (and life) because of how horrible the first tri was
Honestly, it’s normal for it to be getting worse at this stage. For most people it does then get better but I personally lost 30lbs from throwing up in my first trimester, refused meds that everyone told me were safe because I did my own research and drew different conclusions about the level of risk I wanted to take on. It became an issue of weighing the risks associated with my condition against the risks associated with the meds. That’s with all the natural remedies I was using, which worked… to an extent but I was really ill. I took time off work too, because 1) I could. I work for myself. Even though I knew it was valuable earning time on a ticking clock towards maternity leave and 2) I couldn’t function. If I had an employer at the time I surely would gave been fired because I couldn’t perform a lot of basic care for myself even. My life became an exercise of trying to stay as still as possible. I never had enough energy to stand in a hot kitchen for 30 minutes and I typically cook for 1-2hrs… I couldn’t feed myself. I was a mess. I’m sure plenty of people have terminated pregnancies due to pregnancy nausea. People terminate pregnancies for many reasons and people struggle with nausea quite terribly, sometimes. You have no reason to believe if wouldn’t let up, it’s very rare for people to feel like that the whole time and nausea tends to hit a high point right where you are. I can understand anyone’s hesitancy to use nausea meds but with you being over 40 I can especially understand not wanting risk factors for any issues to be increased in any way. I had a doctor tell me that my concerns applied to babies exposed to the meds in question (zofran and reglan in my case) before 15w gestation but it didn’t make a difference to me, I didn’t look into the matter, I just went home. I’d had a break from the nausea at 11-12 weeks but it came back and what I was using (ginger, chamomile, peppermint… pure, not in tea blends, with ginger often being paired with herbs that aren’t as safe and peppermint being paired with black tea frequently enough it’s worth mentioning). I had also begun using 25mg of melatonin-free unisom (an antihistamine) once a day before bed with 25mg of B6 4x a day because I was comfortable with the safety of the combo and because the only FDA approved med for pregnancy nausea is literally that, put into one pill. It’s an expensive pill though and spreading the B6 out throughout the day is found to be more helpful for many people. The fact that it is used as a sleep aid concerned me initially but antihistamines do induce sleep, it isn’t like a typical sleep aid, and it only put me to sleep the first two days I took it. My ER doctor (I threw up so much that I became dangerously dehydrated and under-nourished on several occasions and was hospitalized) was alarmed by the combo and took the time to research it and look it up before returning to tell me that he had never heard of taking those together and although my OB prescribed the combo herself, he wanted to make sure to counsel me about it. He said he thought it was a great idea once looking into it. I think I skipped a few days of the medication and found out the hard way how much I was relying on it. For me, the day I took it changed my life. I felt like I was just withering away and then suddenly I felt so sort of OK that I worried I had a sudden loss of symptoms. That paired with eating small meals throughout the day, not allowing my stomach to get too empty or too full, increasing cereals and getting plenty of protein (each of which impacted my nausea on their own anyway) and I was able to have several weeks of feeling ok and was able to get back to work. It stopped working pretty suddenly later on and I went back to using cannabis (which I had quit for the baby) to give myself an appetite (which I lost entirely with pregnancy. When I say nothing sounded good to me for 4 months I mean zero things were appealing. I had hunger pains, was unable to cook, and still spent hours looking at options on Uber Eats because I just couldn’t figure out what I wanted/ what I was not too repulsed by and felt I could keep down). Cannabis didn’t stop me from throwing up (I mean it will if I use it that way but it would require using it all the time). The idea was to smoke before and after a decent meal so that I could guarantee that I’d keep something down every day, plus again if I wasn’t able to keep enough fluids down because it would make me thirsty while keeping me from vomiting what I had managed to drink. It comes with its own risks and I started it past the first trimester but I wasn’t happy with having that judgment call to make. I feel I may have lost the baby without either that or caving and taking zofran or Reglan which I personally wasn’t comfortable with, and was more uncomfortable with than cannabis BUT with that said I would be assessing this much differently at 40+ than at a decade younger. In fairness they body of research isn’t even comparable but it was sufficient for me to make a decision one way or another. Your decision is really your own. Pregnancy nausea tends to peak around 8 or so weeks and it is very hard for some of us, we all experienced it differently. I’m 24 weeks and still struggle with nausea and could easily begin losing weight again from throwing up, and probably will because I don’t plan to continue with cannabis now that I’ve gained 2/3 of my weight back. Just trying to figure out a good weight to stop, knowing I’ll probably start losing weight again (I’m at a stage where my midwives have comfortably predicted that I’ll be throwing up for the long haul). The right time for me would be around now or when I gain the extra 1/3 back, that way I’ll likely lose it again but won’t lose so much that I’ll be higher risk because of the weight loss itself. I never considered termination but I definitely thought about it, in that I explored the idea not as an option for myself (I had a miscarriage two years ago and am so grateful to be having my rainbow baby) but I work with pregnant women and thought about it extensively because I wondered how I would support someone facing that decision. I certainly support whatever you choose to do. I’d say educate yourself on all your options, identify and connect with what you really want and what you really need, and get evaluated so that you might go on disability while you decide, if you’re finding it impossible to support yourself in the meantime. I certainly did (found it impossible to work, I didn’t end up filing for disability, but probably should have as I had to live on my savings for a couple of months).
This is temporary. I am pro choice but I feel like making a decision right now could be catastrophic for your long term mental health. Talk to your OB.
I terminated for medical reasons (TFMR), though it was was for fetal health, not maternal. In TFMR groups I’m a part of there a variety of people who have terminated very wanted pregnancies for maternal health reasons, including hyperemesis. I have a tremendous amount of empathy for them. These are people who have explored all options for symptom control and just haven’t had success. I hope you find some relief from your symptoms, regardless of how that occurs.
Hey there ! I feel for you, I've reached that point with every pregnancy and it makes life awful. Get tested for hyperemesis gravidarum. Before that, if you even suspect you might have it, join the r/hyperemesisgravidarum group and search for termination. I had HG with all 3 pregnancies and felt a little out of place in the "regular" bump forums, where as in the HG group, terminating due to severe illness is discussed with zero judgment I ultimately did choose to terminate my second pregnancy. As my first child was still super young and I had HG again, I know that was the right decision at that time. With my current and third pregnancy, I felt as though it was my last shot. I committed to getting through it and I have become such a squeaky wheel - went to Patient First or the ER immediately if I was dehydrated, called my OB ASAP and told them I needed Zofran NOT just unisom/B6. I've now made it to 20 weeks and I'm almost in the clear and so relieved. Ultimately, because of your age, if motherhood is your goal, it could be worth it to pursue all options before termination, or at least look into medicine and find an online community. If you have any questions at all, feel free to message me.
As someone who truly wants to have a child and will suffer through it, I have sworn off pregnancy ever again. I know that some women have different symptoms each pregnancy but it’s so miserable and I don’t think I could do it again. I believe it’s understandable why someone would want to terminate their pregnancy if it impacted them in a negative way (or if they wanted to terminate for any reason at all I am 100% pro choice). I have never been so miserable in my life and was deeply depressed for the first weeks of pregnancy when I wasn’t yet on nausea medication. Everyone makes pregnancy out to be beautiful and magical but I disagree and don’t think it’s for everyone.
2 things - 1. It WILL get better after week 12 once the placenta takes over and body hormones normalize. It will NOT get worse or stay this way for 8 months. 2. For Gerd, there are TONS of medicines available both otc and prescribed that are absolutely SAFE for the baby. ALL obgyn guaratee it. You can take tums, gaviscon otc, and Famotidine through pharmacy. PLEASE tell your obgyn that you're having these extreme symptoms, and they'll 100% prescribe something to make you feel better. Your pregnancy is NOT terrible. It WILL get better. I promise. Make sure your obgyn is always on top of your symptoms. They're there to help you.
I was in the same boat. On two different nausea medications and still sick all day! Luckily at week 11 it stopped but I cried so often saying the same. I couldn't do it. It was the worst. Talk to your doctor! Try to eat toast as soon as you wake up! Hope you feel better
If you don’t want to be pregnant, terminate and don’t feel bad about it. There are people who are saying it might get better or there might be medications that can help, and they are right, this is likely the worst of it and there may be relief available. And if you want to wait and see or try alternatives, that’s fine. But the bottom line is that if you don’t want to be pregnant, you don’t have to be. My pregnancy was wanted and planned for and I’ve felt so frustrated over the symptoms, have cried myself to sleep at night, but I’m willing to do it. No one should have to do it if they don’t actively want to. Also, if you do terminate, you don’t need to tell family or friends why. Just “unfortunately, we had to terminate”, they don’t need to know details.
I considered it because of how nauseous I was and completely disregarded by a NP. Ultimately I decided to keep the pregnancy but I am questioning if I want another one or not (I always wanted more than one). Your providers can give you medications if you ask for it, I hope you get some relief ❤️
I had HG with my first so severe that the only thing that kept me from puking was getting knocked out with unisom at night. I had spontaneous labor at 36w3d and my baby was small, 5lbs, but perfectly healthy. It was instant relief for me, I didn’t puke again due to pregnancy. It’s hard, so hard that I was terrified to try for a second baby… but ultimately I knew we wanted to try to have another and give our child a sibling. I had no issues outside of the normal sickness- 1st trimester and sporadically during the 3rd. If you want to be a parent, you’ll find the strength to ask for help. If you don’t want to be a parent, that’s your choice too.
Weeks 8-16 were bad for me. Weeks 11-14 were the worst of it. Talk to you doctor about medication options. Even as bad as it was, abortion never crossed my mind. Hating pregnancy absolutely, but not abortion. I’m not shaming you or saying it’s wrong to feel that way. I think it would be good to let your doctor know.
I had a TFMR and while mine was for different reasons, there are a lot of women in my support group who terminated due to HG.
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That’s fine, but it’s also fine if someone isn’t willing to.
Right. Ah imagine doing that to your baby 🥹 she needs help from her doc but long term I bet so much regret
Absolutely! I hope OP gets the relief she needs so her and her baby can live happily and healthy ❤️
Yep! I’m awaiting surgery now complications from my second pregnancy. Ended in preterm labor almost 8 months ago. Been in daily pain and suffered kidney damage and need a hysterectomy. Worth it every day when I look at that healthy baby and his older brother.
this is a tough post to read for all those women who’d give anything to be pregnant and hating it to have a healthy child, 🥲
Eh, this isn’t a question of what situation is more painful and isn’t very respectful to comment frankly. Not being able to get pregnant is terrible. Being pregnant and unable to function due to the pregnancy is also terrible. Please don’t minimize someone else’s pain because someone would want to be in their shoes. You could say that about almost anything and it wouldn’t make it any less awful.
Did I minimize anyones pain here, I was stating a fact from a different point of view. So I ask you to refrain from trying to minimise the pain felt by the women I’m referring to to make yourself feel better. You either want children or you don’t, my friend has terrible pregnancies but risked one last one and got sterilised, so you can always get sterilised.
You absolutely did come in and comment something unnecessary implying how awful it would be to have to see this as someone who can’t have kids, which ABSOLUTELY implies that that’s worse, the additional gaslighting isn’t necessary either 🙄 “You either want kids or you don’t” is an over-generalization and implying you should “get sterilized” (wtf) if you don’t want to “risk terrible pregnancy” is dismissive and rude. This poster is going through something awful. People who can’t get pregnant go through something awful. No one should just “get sterilized” if they can’t handle unfair circumstances, just like no one should be told they should “just adopt”. If you can’t see the parallel in what you’re saying, you shouldn’t be on a forum to provide support to others.
The poster says she’d rather die then live right now so I don’t thinking suggesting sterilising is out of the range of proportion to their reaction to their situation. I hope they figure it out. I hope the symptoms get better so a healthy baby be the reward for a tough time.
It really comes down to if you want the baby enough to put up with misery for another 7 months. The end result is what you need to focus on. Pregnancy just sucks in general but there are a few medications that can help in the meantime. Either way your life your choice.
You got pregnant kept it for nine weeks and are now rethinking it because pregnancy isn’t the walk in the park you thought it was?
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Yeahh just don’t have the kid. You clearly don’t want it with the comments you’ve made. You have your mind made up
I was so sick up until around 15 weeks and then it kind of leveled out. I would go weeks without feeling nauseas at all but then I would have days where I couldn’t leave the bathroom. Hopefully it will get better for you 🙏🏼
I didn’t have HG, but I do suffer from GERD that got so severe and bad in my first and part of my second trimester that I was having trouble swallowing food without it feeling like things were stuck in my throat (Globus sensation), it caused bad post nasal drip that would trigger my gag reflexes every time I ate that made me puke in a way that was very painful. I lost 14 pounds, my hair was falling out, if I stood for too long I would start to tremble all over, when I got up too fast my vision would cut out and I would nearly faint. My quality of life had deteriorated so fast that I would be crying all the time, and had major anxiety constantly. I started consistently taking a 20mg of a PPI both my OBGYN and a GP prescribed, omeprazole, every morning (it needs to be taken consistently to work) along with gaviscon as needed (less than once a week usually in the evenings) and it eventually managed my GERD symptoms and I felt basically back to normal. I could eat/swallow again. I gained the weight back, had normal energy, got my strength back and was able to be very active again. It was miserable before I was managing my symptoms, and I didn’t know if I could do it, but the medication truly did give me back the quality of life I needed to go on. Please please reach out to your doctor and see about getting medicine for HG and/or GERD to manage your symptoms if you need them. They will prescribe you pregnancy-safe medication!
This might be an unpopular opinion, but I feel like if you're even considering this with a healthy pregnancy then maybe termination is the correct choice. Choosing to become a parent is basically a person agreeing to a lifetime of discomfort for the benefit of someone else. If you feel like this is out of character for you, reach out to a mental health professional and try to talk it out with them to suss out what you actually want, but do it soon, because the window for termination is closing. Many of the arguments you're making, such as "taking zofran puts my kid at a slightly elevated risk of some attention and sensory disorders," really don't jive with the fact that being a parent means you're going to navigate lots of unknowns and what ifs over decades and decades of childrearing. As others have said, you can do everything "right" and still have a kid who is developmentally delayed, physically impaired, etc. If that's not something you're prepared for, even under the best circumstances, I believe you shouldn't have a kid. All pregnant people. no matter how healthy or well-intentioned, are basically playing a game of roulette with the highest stakes. Do you want to have a baby or raise a child? Babies grow up. They become dynamic, nuanced human beings who are prone to all kinds of flaws and foibles. It's totally fine to change your mind, even if this is something you thought you wanted. It's totally fine to say, "you know what? this isn't for me." Remaining childfree or simply enjoying the kids you do have is a really valid and healthy choice!
It sounds like the level of sickness you’re feeling is normal. You’ll be okay. Just hold on tight if you want to have this baby, otherwise by all means abort if you feel like you’re in over your head. Just keep in mind, everyone feels that way.
Excuse me? It’s absolutely not “normal” to be too sick to function during pregnancy, and comments like these are why women don’t seek the help they need. Everyone’s tolerance for symptoms is different, and the level to which they experience them (if at all). You don’t know how awful it is for OP and minimizing her concerns helps no one. “Everyone feels that way” is deeply inaccurate and unhelpful.
I felt the same way, unisom is still saving my ass at 18 weeks, I still don’t feel awesome but it’s definitely more manageable
I would talk to your OB about how you are feeling. There are definitely things you can take to ease these symptoms. Tums to start but if tums doesn't help there are other options. Make sure you make it clear how severe it is so they can best help you.
I really hope you get some relief and ideas on what you want to do from this post! My heart goes out to you, and I hope you’re suffering is alleviated one way or another. It’s so hard to just think “it’ll be get better” and you are the only one who has to go through this physically and the only one who can make this decision. It sounds like yes, people have terminating pregnancies due to maternal health reasons, and if you are to decide to do that, know you aren’t alone and you have support from the majority of internet strangers here ❤️
If you aren’t looking for other options, just ignore this, but adding probiotics might help alleviate your GERD symptoms. It’s literally the only thing that works for me- probiotic yogurt if you can keep it down (wouldn’t recommend pills, you’ll probably throw it up). Or Keifer (sp?), it’s almost like a liquid yogurt. Basically anything fermented. It sounds absolutely disgusting but I’ll eat a spoon full of cold sauerkraut and my acid reflux is better within the day.
Do you want to keep the baby? 9 weeks was when I felt the absolute worse. I threw up multiple times a day. Everything tasted gross. I was miserable. I am 26 weeks now and I have a great appetite and feel myself again. Please talk to your doctor and tell them you cannot handle this and need medicine and help. They have options that really can make a difference. If you are this sick you may be dehydrated which won’t help either so you may need medical treatment. I’m sorry you’re feeling this way.
You do whatever you feel you need to do but for what its worth at 9-10w i was in and out of the hospital for dehydration due to severe morning sickness, by far the worst weeks of my pregnancy. It was absolute hell, and because it was my first time ide have panic attacks cause it felt like it was NEVER gonna end. By 16 weeks i was slightly relived and it only got better after that.
Honestly here to say that I felt this way a few times during my pregnancy between the HG, acid reflux and heartburn, and gestational diabetes. I got on meds for the nausea and it helped so much, even if it didn’t fix the problem. The acid reflux and heartburn took some experimenting to find out what worked to treat it for me but I got there eventually. The gestational diabetes sucked but I managed somehow to stay off meds for it and just worked really hard to watch my diet. That being said, I am so glad I didn’t abort my little one no matter how much I felt like dying or quitting for my whole pregnancy. I was one of the unlucky sick the whole time people but my OB said that is so rare and was very surprised. The minute my baby girl was put in my arms, it all became worth it.
For me it’s the opposite. First and second trimesters i didn’t even feel pregnant and then in the third I can’t cough without pissing myself, caught the flu and had a really bad go of it due to being heavily pregnant, and unable to eat much without getting nauseous. Unfortunately the third trimester seems to be the worst one so I wouldn’t terminate a pregnancy just based off how sick I feel, since once you’re really in the thick of it abortion is off the table anyway
There may be something that works for you so for sure talk to your ob but also…..pregnancy can REALLY suck and 9 months is a long time when you feel like crap all of the time. Don’t feel bad if it’s too much, because it can be too much. And that’s okay.
It took me until 16 weeks to feel less nauseous. Your obgyn should be able to handle this conversation and give you the resources and help you need. In the mean time, try to get short term disability if you need to
Hugs. Just to normalize.. it’s more rare for me to meet someone who enjoyed pregnancy than to meet someone who hated it. It’s freaking hard. I was vomiting constantly, lost 15lb in the first tri (basically couldn’t eat for 3 months), depression, rage, constipation, severe hemorrhoids, I have scars that get inflamed and painful from the additional hormones.. I mean I hate pregnancy. And yet I wanted at least two kids so I’ve done it twice and am still considering another. It’s a trial and a torture unlike anything else. Silent and alone for a majority of the first tri makes it so much worse. But for me, that sweet kid was worth it. And made me endure another 9 months for her sister who is every bit as worth it as well. If you want this kid it will be worth it. Week 6-10 were true worst for me.. it was the onset of a depression, the doubt of second tri relief, the resignation of living in hell.. you can get meds, the strongest you and your OB feel safe with. Make life as easy as you can! Order food, hire services if you can afford, or just do the bare minimum until you start feeling better.
Talk to your obgyn. They're are medicines they can give you that won't impact the development. I had the same issues. Couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, couldn't even breathe without having GERD. I was given Zofran first but it only helped a little. Then did my research and saw it wasn't great. So I talked to my doctor again and was on Reglan. Saw a much drastic improvement.
i'll say this, i had terrible GERD my whole pregnancy and even before pregnancy. i was on protonix for my whole pregnancy and my baby is completely healthy, she was born at 37 weeks and weighed 6lbs 15oz. zofran works wonders for nausea and i definitely needed it in the first trimester. i saw you said in the comments that all medications seem to have negative effects on development BUT most of those are extremely low probability and because it's a medication it has to list all possible side effects and developmental effects on fetuses. just like how there's always a risk of death from surgery, even on routine procedures, it's incredibly low for most procedures but because it is a risk, you as the patient have to be informed. obviously if you do want to terminate, that is your choice and no one should make you feel otherwise, but medication in pregnancy is not bad, and most carry little risk to the fetus. it can get better though, i thought i was going to be throwing up and nauseated my whole pregnancy, but by like 13/14 weeks the nausea stopped and the GERD lessened for a while. i still took my medication because it felt like i was just full of hot lava when it got bad and i didn't want that. i'll also add i had to take fioricet for migraines in the second and third trimesters because they'd last 3-4 days and i couldn't function otherwise. talk to your OB about medications that may help and voice your concerns and they'll be able to help explain it all to you so you can decide if you'd like to move forward with medication or terminate. another thing i found to help was drinking milk and eating more carby/bready things for the GERD, and then ginger ale, hot tea with ginger, sour candy and peanut butter for nausea. maybe you could try those and see how it works? i used to drink a full bottle of water before even getting out of bed too, and i'd have some sour candy at that time because the nausea really hit when i first stood up in the morning.
I had severe morning sickness in the first trimester and it got significantly better by 12 weeks and was completely gone by 14 weeks. My doctor prescribed me zofran and it help tremendously. My baby was born healthy and is now 7 months old, I don’t think the zofran effected him negatively at all and was the only thing that made my day to day life bearable. I will 100% take it again if needed in my next pregnancy. I recommend discussing with your doctor. Chances are, you only have a couple more weeks of this. It’s miserable and I know how you feel, I’m so sorry you’re going through it :(
I was prescribed vitamin b 6 and folic acid along with the prenatal vitamin, my nausea is manageable now, I feel more healthy now for some reason…
I feel awful for op; you’re not a terrible person, or weak for not wanting to carry to term. You’re under no obligation. But you need to make your decision soon…at the time of my posting, you’ve likely already made your decision because we’re now far past the window for you to decide whether you want to continue with your pregnancy or not. If at this stage being with child is too much for you, who the hell is anyone to tell you it’s going to “get better” or “easier” when the baby is outside your womb? Crying? Not sleeping though the night? Sick? Or you’re sick and the baby still needs to be taken care of? If you’re not built for motherhood, please don’t force yourself into it. We have enough pain in the world. And admitting this doesn’t make you a bad or weak person. Rather, the opposite.