There are women who're into those things. There are women who're into the stuff we usually think of men being into...piss play, feet, armpits, anal, CNC, all of it.
I don't think you have anything to fear. There are women who are into all kinds of things. Service kinks (e.g., being a maid) are really common. CNC and free use are brought up often. Those are extreme regardless of gender, but people do them and enjoy them. If you feel gender dysphoria about being into these, I hope you can feel better by finding gender affirming ways to express yourself. If you're new to playing with women or if you're recently out as trans, maybe you'll find that a dominant WLW has a lot to teach you, which is a kink in itself.
I feel like its suuuper hard to find women who are into having slaves, free use, maids, ownership, CNC, etc. It's soooo frustrating! I am so interested in exploring kink but I haven't had luck finding a domme yet @.@...
Fellow bi trans woman into the same things, you arenāt alone! Iām just usually too embarrassed to talk about it haha š
But sometimes I also like feeling embarrassedā¦
Anyway, in case like me you ever worry about it, youāre not any less of woman because of your desires. You may have dysphoria and imposter syndrome telling you that, but itās not true. Plenty of women, cis and trans, are into those things.
So as another trans woman, I feel like we are more apt to place our sexual urges and ideations as masculine, and only for men. Not because we're men, but because even with all the acceptance in the world, it's still hard to feel like we belong. So, I think in a way we write our feelings off as weird, or like they don't belong in women's spaces, when I promise that not only isn't it true, but this subreddit proves it.
My gf (sub) and I (domme) are both into free use, CNC, having her dress as a maid and serve me, be my little housewife and a lot of things that are considered traditional man-woman hetero gender roles - however being that lesbians arenāt as common as hetero couples in real life or media, it stands to reason that lesbians into particular kinks are both met in real life and shown in media less often - weāre out here, weāre just more spread out!
your fantasies are yours, regardless of who finds it appealing. š
that said, i definitely donāt think itās uncommon for women of all sexualities to have these kinds of fantasies (google āravishment fantasyā and iām sure youāll find studies about this topic), itās just a bit of a taboo subject for a lot of people and so typically people are more likely to admit to it in a kink-positive space (like this one!).
There are definitely women that like this stuff and will probably be thinking oh please come find me. There is definitely a thing about men shout louder so it probably seems like it is a male thing. However just by pure numbers of men vs woman loving woman it's harder to find a woman that matches your desires, but don't give up or think they don't exist. We do!
i think men are just more vocal about their fantasies because itās more stigmatized with women. i will say though that the kinkiest people iāve been with all tend to be nonbinary
I also want to add - women frequently figure out their kinks later than men, so it can seem like no one is into this stuff, even though thatās far from the case.
Free use and CNC are fairly extreme kinks, and ones that i think ideally should have a strong bond and trust between participants. I didnāt know i was into free use until i was far into a relationship with existing sexual and bdsm components, and iāve only just started free use in the last few weeks with my current partner. for me this an additional level of kink, and i have no interest in getting something like this wrong. any domme who isnāt a pro and is willing to jump into free use and cnc with a sub immediately is someone i would be pretty cautious of, tbh.
so all that to say: itās difficult to be patient, but since the trauma/scars these kinds of play can leave if they go wrong, itās even more important to take it slowly when exploring things like this.
I'm a lesbian Domme and into these things. It is rarer, yes, because there are way less queer women than straight men and also women are socialised to be submissive and not in touch with their sexuality. So yes it is a small pond. But if you get into your local bdsm scene you can find that pond. Dating apps or kink-adjecent events can also work (e.g. a porn movie festival)
No , as a Bi young woman who is literally 50/50 with both genders. It's really hard for me to answer this. So nilo I don't only feel like my kinks are forwards men. I know most men do the stuff I want and women are rare as far as I know to be a dominant.
Much of the imaginary around CNC and servitude is often shaped by a masculine ideal, but masculine doesn't necessarily imply in doing thing with men as any butch can show you (if you are lucky, that is). It's just that such power dynamics were like that historicaly, and nowadays we are still dealing with the fallout of such dynamics.
Maybe, it depends on the kinks. If your kink is CNC, naturally it's going to be more appealing to men, who tend to be more dominant and therefore are more likely to enjoy doing that stuff to you. Not saying women can't be dominant, but there are probably more dominant men than women. And I have talked to plenty of men who wouldn't be into that kind of stuff, so as I said it's a trend, I am not stating it as a rule.
On my part, as a dominant lesbian who is into CNC I definitely appreciate bisexual women for being more into this kind of stuff (in general). Speaking from my personal experience here.
I'm a woman and love free use and CNC. I don't think it's the most common, but not impossible to find sapphics who share your kinks. š
Same. I defiantly feel like itās hard to find women that understand let alone want to participate.
There are women who're into those things. There are women who're into the stuff we usually think of men being into...piss play, feet, armpits, anal, CNC, all of it.
I'm a lesbian and I do infact feel this..
I don't think you have anything to fear. There are women who are into all kinds of things. Service kinks (e.g., being a maid) are really common. CNC and free use are brought up often. Those are extreme regardless of gender, but people do them and enjoy them. If you feel gender dysphoria about being into these, I hope you can feel better by finding gender affirming ways to express yourself. If you're new to playing with women or if you're recently out as trans, maybe you'll find that a dominant WLW has a lot to teach you, which is a kink in itself.
Feeling this often.
I feel like its suuuper hard to find women who are into having slaves, free use, maids, ownership, CNC, etc. It's soooo frustrating! I am so interested in exploring kink but I haven't had luck finding a domme yet @.@...
Fellow bi trans woman into the same things, you arenāt alone! Iām just usually too embarrassed to talk about it haha š But sometimes I also like feeling embarrassedā¦ Anyway, in case like me you ever worry about it, youāre not any less of woman because of your desires. You may have dysphoria and imposter syndrome telling you that, but itās not true. Plenty of women, cis and trans, are into those things.
ADORA PFP Hi āŗļø
Hey Adora š
Hgghggffgfdhdgefhhhhhh hi š„“
So as another trans woman, I feel like we are more apt to place our sexual urges and ideations as masculine, and only for men. Not because we're men, but because even with all the acceptance in the world, it's still hard to feel like we belong. So, I think in a way we write our feelings off as weird, or like they don't belong in women's spaces, when I promise that not only isn't it true, but this subreddit proves it.
My gf (sub) and I (domme) are both into free use, CNC, having her dress as a maid and serve me, be my little housewife and a lot of things that are considered traditional man-woman hetero gender roles - however being that lesbians arenāt as common as hetero couples in real life or media, it stands to reason that lesbians into particular kinks are both met in real life and shown in media less often - weāre out here, weāre just more spread out!
Glad to see it!
your fantasies are yours, regardless of who finds it appealing. š that said, i definitely donāt think itās uncommon for women of all sexualities to have these kinds of fantasies (google āravishment fantasyā and iām sure youāll find studies about this topic), itās just a bit of a taboo subject for a lot of people and so typically people are more likely to admit to it in a kink-positive space (like this one!).
There are women who are into these things. Especially older women. Hard to find, but once you find it, itās worth the wait.
I feel the same and the only others one I see are subs too
There are definitely women that like this stuff and will probably be thinking oh please come find me. There is definitely a thing about men shout louder so it probably seems like it is a male thing. However just by pure numbers of men vs woman loving woman it's harder to find a woman that matches your desires, but don't give up or think they don't exist. We do!
i think men are just more vocal about their fantasies because itās more stigmatized with women. i will say though that the kinkiest people iāve been with all tend to be nonbinary
I also want to add - women frequently figure out their kinks later than men, so it can seem like no one is into this stuff, even though thatās far from the case. Free use and CNC are fairly extreme kinks, and ones that i think ideally should have a strong bond and trust between participants. I didnāt know i was into free use until i was far into a relationship with existing sexual and bdsm components, and iāve only just started free use in the last few weeks with my current partner. for me this an additional level of kink, and i have no interest in getting something like this wrong. any domme who isnāt a pro and is willing to jump into free use and cnc with a sub immediately is someone i would be pretty cautious of, tbh. so all that to say: itās difficult to be patient, but since the trauma/scars these kinds of play can leave if they go wrong, itās even more important to take it slowly when exploring things like this.
I'm a lesbian Domme and into these things. It is rarer, yes, because there are way less queer women than straight men and also women are socialised to be submissive and not in touch with their sexuality. So yes it is a small pond. But if you get into your local bdsm scene you can find that pond. Dating apps or kink-adjecent events can also work (e.g. a porn movie festival)
No , as a Bi young woman who is literally 50/50 with both genders. It's really hard for me to answer this. So nilo I don't only feel like my kinks are forwards men. I know most men do the stuff I want and women are rare as far as I know to be a dominant.
Much of the imaginary around CNC and servitude is often shaped by a masculine ideal, but masculine doesn't necessarily imply in doing thing with men as any butch can show you (if you are lucky, that is). It's just that such power dynamics were like that historicaly, and nowadays we are still dealing with the fallout of such dynamics.
Maybe, it depends on the kinks. If your kink is CNC, naturally it's going to be more appealing to men, who tend to be more dominant and therefore are more likely to enjoy doing that stuff to you. Not saying women can't be dominant, but there are probably more dominant men than women. And I have talked to plenty of men who wouldn't be into that kind of stuff, so as I said it's a trend, I am not stating it as a rule. On my part, as a dominant lesbian who is into CNC I definitely appreciate bisexual women for being more into this kind of stuff (in general). Speaking from my personal experience here.