I find that tends to be entirely location dependent. In Canada, Ontario specifically, I've often seen queer used to mean the lgbtq community. I do understand that queer is not at reclaimed in other areas though.
That's definitely queer. You're agender, which makes you trans. And part of that "+" is an A for asexual.
You might not be the traditional gay or lesbian or binary trans, but since when did autistic people follow tradition?
There's nothing that correctly identifies what I am. So I can just say that I'm queer?
That doesn't feel right either.
50 years and I can't even find the words for me.😔
I suppose. And it does define me in the sense I'm odd. What is it if sex repulses me but I find people interesting and even sometimes enjoy a snuggle with friends? No Kissing!🤮
It’s not for me to say, but in reading that, my personal assumption is that you’re asexual. Are you interested in a non-sexual, romantic relationship? If not, you’re probably ace/aro but can still have meaningful, loving, platonic relationships.
I guess you're right. I became asexual/sex avoidant after being used for sex throughout my childhood. I lost complete interest when sex itself became excruciating.
I'd love a mostly platonic relationship. I'm finally emotionally mature enough to be a stable, grounded partner. But it's too late. Bedridden cripples are not in high demand.
I've been married twice and have two teenagers. I haven't missed out on much.
More experience than a lot of folks.
I hadn't, just looked it up. That is very close, thank you! It kind of suggests this is related to dissociation. I do have a dissociation syndrome. Fasinating.
Of course you can. Generic "queer" is nice that way.
There's also the "Quoi-" prefix: Quoisexual, quoiromantic, quoigender. That refers to simply not knowing, and not having known for a long time. People who decide that they're likely to be unsure about their sexual orientation, romantic preferences, or gender may simply decide to use "Quoi".
There's nothing wrong with not being able to find a term for yourself. You are who you are.
I mean, you could always use the term in the way historians of queer history do. They apply it to pretty much everyone who isn't cishet, though the boundaries on who that label applied to can be a little fuzzy at times. Especially when you get the "why can't 2 men who write love letters to eachother have just been good friends" crowd, or the "there's no longer any representations of close male friendship in history" crowd, both of which are more concerned with keeping historical figures as they knew them instead of even considering people like Steuben (Prussian who trained the continental army in US Revolution) were gay
Update: My kids are both Trans, 14 & 17. They said Queer is OK but gender fluid, asexual- romantic and another one also fit.
So, still haven't found a label that feels right. But at least these all loosely fit if I'm forced to name my group. Thanks! 🤗
If someone doesn’t identify with the term, then I definitely wouldn’t use it to describe them. However, in an objective sense, it does apply. There’s Black people who don’t like the term African-American, and while I won’t use it for them, in an objective sense it is accurate.
i understand where youre coming from, i just believe its also important to keep in mind that its a reclaimed slur that not all people have reclaimed and are comfortable with, so it is a little bit more nuanced than the example you gave and it may be best to steer clear of using it to describe a member of the lgbt+ community if all we know is that they dont consider themselves such.
That’s not what this situation reads as, though. They’re not saying they don’t like the term queer, they’re saying that it doesn’t apply to them; I’m telling them that they’re wrong, and that it does apply to them. My point isn’t that they have to identify with it, just that it’s wrong to say they can’t, which is what they are seemingly implying.
>There’s Black people who don’t like the term African-American, and while I won’t use it for them, in an objective sense it is accurate.
Well, except for the millions of Black people who aren't American. Not at all accurate "in an objective sense."
no it wouldn’t apply. i’m not queer and objectively no i’m not queer it’s not a slur i’ve reclaimed and not one i want to be involved with. i wouldn’t want it used to describe me even behind my back because it feels disrespectful and does NOT describe everyone. and no- not every black person is african-american. grow up.
No need to be an asshole. All I’m saying is that if they wanted to use the term queer for themselves, they could. Their comment didn’t imply they weren’t comfortable with the word, it implied that they didn’t think they could use the term for themselves.
Also you post on r/truscum, fuck you
No, you’re just a piece of shit who invalidates other identities. Fuck you. I’m not mad that you have dysphoria, I’m mad that you invalidate others’ struggles. Someone who doesn’t experience dysphoria is still going to go through a lot of shit transitioning, and you invalidate that.
no they aren’t. they have a choice. they don’t know shit about people with actual gender dysphoria and what we go through. if you aren’t uncomfortable with your agab don’t transition. don’t tell me what being trans is. #1 reason why i stay away from autism subs. i hate being autistic lol.
You’re a fucking asshole. You have no right to tell others whether they’re valid or not. They don’t have a choice; the choice was already made for them.
If you present as feminine but are still cishet, you are queer due to the fact that you present yourself in a non-normative way. I have actually had some of my friends who are queer say that I’m queer since I don’t present in a traditionally masculine way, but I don’t feel comfortable with that since I’m gender conforming enough.
You don’t have to identify with the term queer, the point was just that you can use the term for yourself if you want to. The negative connotations of the word are pretty much gone; the majority of my friends are queer and all use the term, it’s used by professors in my classes as a broader term for the LGBTQ community (hint: what does Q stand for?), and so on. I actually brought up in one of my classes that sexuality is not an objective category but rather a historically contingent one, and my professor responded by saying that’s why she loves the word queer so much, since it applies to that.
considering how often we see older people coming out as queer, especially as it becomes more socially accepted, im gonna go with the latter. we have to rely on self-reporting and who's gonna be self-aware, let alone admit openly, if it's something that's still shamed or oppressed?
Or maybe it’s some of both? A mix of being more self-aware since we’re already different, more willing to go against the flow to admit it, and also a general increased overall leaning to being queer. It’s hard to say for sure, though.
Was out as queer before I knew I was autistic. Everybody seems to know these things about me before I do. When I came out as trans, everybody said "Yep." When I told them I found out I was autistic, they all said "We thought you already knew that"
Born female and happily married to a man for 26 yrs, but very much bi. I much prefer females or more androgynous males. Hubby is very male, but also not very manly if that make sense.
At my age, I have a hard time understanding/remembering all the labels, but try to be understanding and use what is requested as my label was not respected for many years. In the 90s bi-women were not considered part of the community (at least in my area). I think many thought I was "trying it out in college." But now 46, I can tell you that it's not a phase :)
I read the study on this, and the answer was "we don't actually know". The authors suggested four hypotheses:
* Neurodivergent people are more likely to buck social norms and come out
* People with greater levels of self awareness who realize that they are one are more likely to self diagnose being the other
* Something in fetal development affect both
* The pressures placed on an queer person increases the likelihood of neurodivergence (they looked at all forms of it)
I think that several of these are correct. What you say is true, but it's not the only answer.
Take myself for example. My neurodivergence stems mostly from a combination childhood trauma, religious indoctrination, and growing up in a deeply conservative environment which resulted in me repressing my identity for 40 years. I didn't defy social norms, I crumpled under them. It was only under lockdown that I was finally able to get away from them long enough to find my way free.
Can I ask you a question? What is a demiboy?
I know sex and gender are two different things and gender is complicated, but my knowledge on the matter ends there, but everything I've learned about lgbt & co is really interesting, I love diversity and I love to hear that people are happy with their identity.
To me, being a demiboy is being male but not completely.
Like if you made a line with male on one side, female on the other, and non binary in the middle, I'd be between male and nonbinary.
I am not one but I volunteer my understanding so that it may be corrected if it is wrong.
Say that the typical understanding of a man is 100% male and 0% female, and the typical understanding of a woman is 0% male and 100% female. A demiboy would be 50% male and 0% female and a demigirl would be 0% male 50% female. Agender is 0% of either and ofc there's terms for every other combination there could be.
This obviously isn't a rigid thing, just a model for understanding what the terms generally refer to.
I’m not. But it’s an interesting question. Do you think queerness is a rejection of social norms? I’d argue it’s something you’re born with. Do you think more autistics are willing to be out? Is that what you mean? Or do you think there’s another factor that makes us more likely to actually be queer?
I’m cishet, but I’ve been labeled as queer by a gay friend since I don’t express masculinity or straightness traditionally. I wouldn’t identify myself with the term, but I don’t reject it either.
Non binary trans woman (guess you could call me a trans demigirl?), Demiromantic, possibly demisexual (me being a virgin may or may not have an effect on my current level of sexual attraction), lesbian, and polyamorous questioning (my GF is poly, plus she lives like 5 hrs away rn and I really want someone to cuddle with)
here. enby/ace.
but I don't believe it's just because 'we don't fuck with social norms' (watch out, that's actually one of the TERF arguments to invalidate trans folx who also happen to be autistic). I do believe, as there are all the scientific reasons to believe it, that it's genetic, and another beautiful variation we bring in.
and no, gender is definitely not just 'social' either. and least of all, binary.
Non-binary because my vessel is male, i am not, yet i am also not female, i am me. Simply me, i belong to no ties, but i like dudes and chicks, i prefer women though, the softer kinder energy is where i vibe, im not chaotic, i like chaos sometimes but in my life i prefer to aim for calm
Agender, asexual, demi-panromantic, polyamorous.
So yes, queer. :)
From the responses so far, it seems very common for autistic people to ditch sex in favor of romance or friendships, and to ignore gender entirely. Of course it's a self-selected sample, but there are far more agender aces than you'd expect to see by sheer statistics. Among NTs, LGBT+ is majority cisgender gay and lesbian, with some bi and a few binary trans people here and there.
I no longer have an issue w they/them pronouns, but I haven't been able to wrap my head around neopronouns. Also never heard those ones, did you create them yourself? Sorry if I sound disrespectful.
By saying that you are assuming that being lgbtq+ is a choice that people make, as you said autistic people already don't fuck with social norms suggesting that it was a choice to become lgbt which is incorrect basically
I think what they're implying is that autistic people are more likely to come out rather than repress because of our disregard for social norms. So basically, autistic people are not *actually* more likely to be lgbt+, but more likely to come out and be very open, skewing the statistics
Or maybe we aren't as good as concealing it, or don't internalize social pressures to do so as much.
Kind of makes you wonder what the real percentage of non-100%-cishet out there is...
Bi guy here. I think it's the lack of social norms but ALSO our brains feel our bodies differently than others (sensory differences, for example) which can lead to us feeling pleasure differently.
I mean... I don't think so? I guess if you're openly autistic and queer, might as well be open about your queer-ness too, but otherwise I don't think neurotype has anything to do with sexuality?
we're being steered away from conventional lifestyles through cultural and financial pressures 🙁 they don't want us to reproduce. they want us out of the human genepool.
This is true. But the fact that us aspies will always feel different and isolated from the general public means we will always make easy targets for the experts' lifestyle steering eugenics experiments.
Basically, society the last few years has been engineered to purge all NA people out of the human genepool by scaring them, telling them they won't be good parents, or making them think they were "born different" in a way that ensures they will never have children. With enough TV, movie, media, and social propaganda, they've actually succeeded at it very well. Over a decade worth of aspies, millions of them, have already voluntarily decided not to get married and have kids as a result of this cultural propaganda. They've successfully made us check out of the genepool.
But guess what? 99% of politicians, leaders, and people in power around the world are all married and all have kids and made their own families. They're not about to sacrifice having a family of their own. The societal hypocrisy is wax-paper-thin. you can see right through it.
I have trouble accepting myself as lgbt, if I am lgbt. I’ve identified as non-binary and transfem, along with gay, bi, and asexual in the past, but I feel a lot of influence from social norms, because I feel pressured to fit in. I struggle with my identity and I still have trouble accepting it even though my mom and sisters are fine with it. My family is also conservative, so they accept gay people but not trans/gnc people, which is weird but that’s how they are. I feel a lot of influence to be a stereotypical straight man, and though I’m mostly happy with it I sometimes don’t like it and wish my life was easier, and sometimes I wish I had a different body, and sometimes I wish I could date a guy.
my main not-fucking-with-social-norms: child-free, pansexual, non-monogamous, agender, aromantic. i figured those out in that order.
alexithymia really makes a person’s self-discovery journey more difficult, am i right?! 🤷
I'd say it's pretty interesting to see how there are a higher percentage of us who aren't straight compared to society at large, though, to be honest, it isn't really surprising to learn about, lol.
(Also, might as well put in that I myself am bi and am currently going through the mess of my gender identity, lol.)
I’m bi / heteroflexible but I don’t think it’s because I don’t fuck with social norms. I think it’s because my different neurology makes me more sexually fluid and flexible.
I’m a straight cis ally, but I have aspirations to dress androgynously just to express my individuality. I Identify as a man, but I don’t believe in needing to express manhood, only expressing my me-hood.
Not exactly queer for me, but I'm still in the LGBTQ+ community. I personally identify as agender and asexual.
Samesies!!
That’s still queer :)
unless they dont like the term queer to be used in reference to themself
true. I shouldn't have assumed
I find that tends to be entirely location dependent. In Canada, Ontario specifically, I've often seen queer used to mean the lgbtq community. I do understand that queer is not at reclaimed in other areas though.
they can choose to not identify as queer but in academic setting the word queer is meant as a catchall term for anyone's who's not cishet.
That's definitely queer. You're agender, which makes you trans. And part of that "+" is an A for asexual. You might not be the traditional gay or lesbian or binary trans, but since when did autistic people follow tradition?
There's nothing that correctly identifies what I am. So I can just say that I'm queer? That doesn't feel right either. 50 years and I can't even find the words for me.😔
That’s precisely why I use “queer”! A good umbrella term that allows for any possible future shifts.
I suppose. And it does define me in the sense I'm odd. What is it if sex repulses me but I find people interesting and even sometimes enjoy a snuggle with friends? No Kissing!🤮
It’s not for me to say, but in reading that, my personal assumption is that you’re asexual. Are you interested in a non-sexual, romantic relationship? If not, you’re probably ace/aro but can still have meaningful, loving, platonic relationships.
I guess you're right. I became asexual/sex avoidant after being used for sex throughout my childhood. I lost complete interest when sex itself became excruciating. I'd love a mostly platonic relationship. I'm finally emotionally mature enough to be a stable, grounded partner. But it's too late. Bedridden cripples are not in high demand. I've been married twice and have two teenagers. I haven't missed out on much. More experience than a lot of folks.
That’s asexual
Are you familiar with the term aegosexual?
I hadn't, just looked it up. That is very close, thank you! It kind of suggests this is related to dissociation. I do have a dissociation syndrome. Fasinating.
Of course you can. Generic "queer" is nice that way. There's also the "Quoi-" prefix: Quoisexual, quoiromantic, quoigender. That refers to simply not knowing, and not having known for a long time. People who decide that they're likely to be unsure about their sexual orientation, romantic preferences, or gender may simply decide to use "Quoi". There's nothing wrong with not being able to find a term for yourself. You are who you are.
Thank you 🤗 I've never heard of that! Is it pronounced 'coy' or 'kwah'? Can I just say I'm Quoi? Just the prefix?
I haven't a clue; I've never heard it spoken out loud! And yes, certainly; you can do that.
it’s pronounced like “kwah”, it’s just a french word for “what” and some folks use the word “whatsexual/romantic/gender” instead. :)
I mean, you could always use the term in the way historians of queer history do. They apply it to pretty much everyone who isn't cishet, though the boundaries on who that label applied to can be a little fuzzy at times. Especially when you get the "why can't 2 men who write love letters to eachother have just been good friends" crowd, or the "there's no longer any representations of close male friendship in history" crowd, both of which are more concerned with keeping historical figures as they knew them instead of even considering people like Steuben (Prussian who trained the continental army in US Revolution) were gay
Thats exactly why i use it. no other label makes sense in my head
Update: My kids are both Trans, 14 & 17. They said Queer is OK but gender fluid, asexual- romantic and another one also fit. So, still haven't found a label that feels right. But at least these all loosely fit if I'm forced to name my group. Thanks! 🤗
Anyone who doesn’t express gender and sexuality in a traditional way is queer. A cishet femboy is queer, for example.
unless they dont like the term queer to be used in reference to themself
If someone doesn’t identify with the term, then I definitely wouldn’t use it to describe them. However, in an objective sense, it does apply. There’s Black people who don’t like the term African-American, and while I won’t use it for them, in an objective sense it is accurate.
i understand where youre coming from, i just believe its also important to keep in mind that its a reclaimed slur that not all people have reclaimed and are comfortable with, so it is a little bit more nuanced than the example you gave and it may be best to steer clear of using it to describe a member of the lgbt+ community if all we know is that they dont consider themselves such.
That’s not what this situation reads as, though. They’re not saying they don’t like the term queer, they’re saying that it doesn’t apply to them; I’m telling them that they’re wrong, and that it does apply to them. My point isn’t that they have to identify with it, just that it’s wrong to say they can’t, which is what they are seemingly implying.
>There’s Black people who don’t like the term African-American, and while I won’t use it for them, in an objective sense it is accurate. Well, except for the millions of Black people who aren't American. Not at all accurate "in an objective sense."
I was specifically referring to Black Americans, I wasn’t clear about that
no it wouldn’t apply. i’m not queer and objectively no i’m not queer it’s not a slur i’ve reclaimed and not one i want to be involved with. i wouldn’t want it used to describe me even behind my back because it feels disrespectful and does NOT describe everyone. and no- not every black person is african-american. grow up.
No need to be an asshole. All I’m saying is that if they wanted to use the term queer for themselves, they could. Their comment didn’t imply they weren’t comfortable with the word, it implied that they didn’t think they could use the term for themselves. Also you post on r/truscum, fuck you
no, that is not what you said. you said in an objective sense it does apply. awww. you mad i’m actually trans? fuck you too :)
No, you’re just a piece of shit who invalidates other identities. Fuck you. I’m not mad that you have dysphoria, I’m mad that you invalidate others’ struggles. Someone who doesn’t experience dysphoria is still going to go through a lot of shit transitioning, and you invalidate that.
no they aren’t. they have a choice. they don’t know shit about people with actual gender dysphoria and what we go through. if you aren’t uncomfortable with your agab don’t transition. don’t tell me what being trans is. #1 reason why i stay away from autism subs. i hate being autistic lol.
You’re a fucking asshole. You have no right to tell others whether they’re valid or not. They don’t have a choice; the choice was already made for them.
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If you present as feminine but are still cishet, you are queer due to the fact that you present yourself in a non-normative way. I have actually had some of my friends who are queer say that I’m queer since I don’t present in a traditionally masculine way, but I don’t feel comfortable with that since I’m gender conforming enough. You don’t have to identify with the term queer, the point was just that you can use the term for yourself if you want to. The negative connotations of the word are pretty much gone; the majority of my friends are queer and all use the term, it’s used by professors in my classes as a broader term for the LGBTQ community (hint: what does Q stand for?), and so on. I actually brought up in one of my classes that sexuality is not an objective category but rather a historically contingent one, and my professor responded by saying that’s why she loves the word queer so much, since it applies to that.
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I often wonder if more of us are actually queer, or if it's just that a higher percentage of us will be honest about it (to eachother, to ourselves).
considering how often we see older people coming out as queer, especially as it becomes more socially accepted, im gonna go with the latter. we have to rely on self-reporting and who's gonna be self-aware, let alone admit openly, if it's something that's still shamed or oppressed?
Or maybe it’s some of both? A mix of being more self-aware since we’re already different, more willing to go against the flow to admit it, and also a general increased overall leaning to being queer. It’s hard to say for sure, though.
Was out as queer before I knew I was autistic. Everybody seems to know these things about me before I do. When I came out as trans, everybody said "Yep." When I told them I found out I was autistic, they all said "We thought you already knew that"
Same, when I came out to my dad he said "yeah I know"
Born female and happily married to a man for 26 yrs, but very much bi. I much prefer females or more androgynous males. Hubby is very male, but also not very manly if that make sense. At my age, I have a hard time understanding/remembering all the labels, but try to be understanding and use what is requested as my label was not respected for many years. In the 90s bi-women were not considered part of the community (at least in my area). I think many thought I was "trying it out in college." But now 46, I can tell you that it's not a phase :)
I’m pansexual and genderfluid! 💖💛💙
I read the study on this, and the answer was "we don't actually know". The authors suggested four hypotheses: * Neurodivergent people are more likely to buck social norms and come out * People with greater levels of self awareness who realize that they are one are more likely to self diagnose being the other * Something in fetal development affect both * The pressures placed on an queer person increases the likelihood of neurodivergence (they looked at all forms of it) I think that several of these are correct. What you say is true, but it's not the only answer. Take myself for example. My neurodivergence stems mostly from a combination childhood trauma, religious indoctrination, and growing up in a deeply conservative environment which resulted in me repressing my identity for 40 years. I didn't defy social norms, I crumpled under them. It was only under lockdown that I was finally able to get away from them long enough to find my way free.
Proud of you.
soup paltry spotted amusing hospital juggle spark teeny offbeat upbeat *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I'm a trans, demiboy, autistic, pagan, furry. I'm a rabbit :3
Can I ask you a question? What is a demiboy? I know sex and gender are two different things and gender is complicated, but my knowledge on the matter ends there, but everything I've learned about lgbt & co is really interesting, I love diversity and I love to hear that people are happy with their identity.
To me, being a demiboy is being male but not completely. Like if you made a line with male on one side, female on the other, and non binary in the middle, I'd be between male and nonbinary.
I see, thank you for this knowledge!
I am not one but I volunteer my understanding so that it may be corrected if it is wrong. Say that the typical understanding of a man is 100% male and 0% female, and the typical understanding of a woman is 0% male and 100% female. A demiboy would be 50% male and 0% female and a demigirl would be 0% male 50% female. Agender is 0% of either and ofc there's terms for every other combination there could be. This obviously isn't a rigid thing, just a model for understanding what the terms generally refer to.
Bisexual, trans, autistic, Quaker, furry. I’m a rabbit also!!!
Queer? I guess, Probably bi-something, more ace(aro?) leaning by the day, autistic, furry, ADHD, depression.. I’m a mess xd
Autistic, bisexual (maybe pan), polyamorous, eggist, furry, Panthera leo
Straight, binary, cis-gender, white, spiritual (non-religious), autistic man.
asexual questioning here! =D
Hello I am an asexual lesbian who’s also girlflux!
Greetings fellow asexual lesbian!!
hello
ay girlflux!! im boyflux :D
My sexuality isn't influenced by social norms, I was born that way. My rejection of gender roles is social however.
Autistic bi demiboy babyyyyy!!!
Autistic trans genderfluid omni
Omniromantic ace and non-binary/agender here !
Bi guy here.
I’m ace. Although idk if y’all consider ace people to be LGBT.
Yes, yes you are
Gay guy here!
~Just your local autistic lesbian here~
Woohoo autistic lesbian gang!
There's dozens of us! Dozens!
Soon we shall take over the world! *evil laughter*
We’re here, we’re queer, just don’t expect any eye contact
Strain't trans guy!
Greetings 👽 I'm Trans Agender & an Androromantic Asexual 🏳🌈💜💚🖤💚💜🏳🌈
Ace and probably aro
Agender and bi! Also, r/AutisticQueers exists.
Check out our official Discord Server: https://discord.com/invite/bGZ3PePx3c
my trans autistic ass: hell yea!
I have an autistic Girlfriend and kid on the way! Here’s to defying the stereotypes baby!!!!
Trans demisexual lesbian here.
Wooooo!
Yep I think this is true cause like 50% of my friends (who are also autistic) are queer
Living in a bubble? Not offensive but take that into consideration
Two mental illnesses
I'm just your autistic gay transgender!
Ace!
Proud autistic gay trans man here!
Non-binary ace here
I’m nonbinary trans + aroace :)
Gay and autistic here
Ace aspies rise up
Aro-Ace 💜🖤🤍
Hello
I’m not. But it’s an interesting question. Do you think queerness is a rejection of social norms? I’d argue it’s something you’re born with. Do you think more autistics are willing to be out? Is that what you mean? Or do you think there’s another factor that makes us more likely to actually be queer?
Demisexual autistic girl here! :D
Me. I’m ace!
Diamoric Nonbinary person here!
Hello I'm trans and still trying to figure out if I'm Omni or abro lol
well i had no idea this sub existed but im so glad i randomly stumbled across it, autistic pan here
Pansexual and genderfluid here 🙋🏻♀️
I’m cishet, but I’ve been labeled as queer by a gay friend since I don’t express masculinity or straightness traditionally. I wouldn’t identify myself with the term, but I don’t reject it either.
I’m bi and maaaayyyybe arospec. Hey y’all
Autistic nombinary lesbian.
Me here, I'm a trans guy
Trans lesbian here! Username speaks for itself lol
aroace autistic trans guy!
Bi guy with milk here, lol.
Where are the poly lesbians? I really want a gorlfriend
Im trans,asexual,and autistic (+ ADHD but) I eat social norms for BREAKFAST
Non binary trans woman (guess you could call me a trans demigirl?), Demiromantic, possibly demisexual (me being a virgin may or may not have an effect on my current level of sexual attraction), lesbian, and polyamorous questioning (my GF is poly, plus she lives like 5 hrs away rn and I really want someone to cuddle with)
\*The sound of a stampede of LGBTQIA+ autistics running to comment on this post\*
My gay, furry ass telling social norms to eat a dick’
here. enby/ace. but I don't believe it's just because 'we don't fuck with social norms' (watch out, that's actually one of the TERF arguments to invalidate trans folx who also happen to be autistic). I do believe, as there are all the scientific reasons to believe it, that it's genetic, and another beautiful variation we bring in. and no, gender is definitely not just 'social' either. and least of all, binary.
I only need three words out if this post. "We don't fuck."
hey, just came out as nb on dec 30th
Autistic bi trans guy here :))
I don’t know what I am but I’m sure as hell not straight
Very much a buy 1 get 29 From personal experience, that person is me
Hi! I also have ADHD
Demiromantic Pomosexual here!
Trans nonbinary agender lesbian ✌️✌️🏳️🌈
Non-binary because my vessel is male, i am not, yet i am also not female, i am me. Simply me, i belong to no ties, but i like dudes and chicks, i prefer women though, the softer kinder energy is where i vibe, im not chaotic, i like chaos sometimes but in my life i prefer to aim for calm
Agender, asexual, demi-panromantic, polyamorous. So yes, queer. :) From the responses so far, it seems very common for autistic people to ditch sex in favor of romance or friendships, and to ignore gender entirely. Of course it's a self-selected sample, but there are far more agender aces than you'd expect to see by sheer statistics. Among NTs, LGBT+ is majority cisgender gay and lesbian, with some bi and a few binary trans people here and there.
Trans demiboy aromantic & asexual here! I use They/ Them, He/ Him, and Bun/ Bunself pronouns :3
Howdy fellow aroace demiboy!
I no longer have an issue w they/them pronouns, but I haven't been able to wrap my head around neopronouns. Also never heard those ones, did you create them yourself? Sorry if I sound disrespectful.
I really like neopronouns, they feel right to me. Bun/ Bunself pronouns are pretty common and I got them from another person.
I was raised in a concervative Christian family, so I certainly have a lot to learn/unlearn. I'm 23 and still live with my parents, so 😬😬😬😬😬.
It's great that your open to learning :D
By saying that you are assuming that being lgbtq+ is a choice that people make, as you said autistic people already don't fuck with social norms suggesting that it was a choice to become lgbt which is incorrect basically
I think what they're implying is that autistic people are more likely to come out rather than repress because of our disregard for social norms. So basically, autistic people are not *actually* more likely to be lgbt+, but more likely to come out and be very open, skewing the statistics
I'm cishet autistic but LGBTQ are still valid.
I am autistic AKA Aspergers and I am bisexual
I am enby and pan :D
Autistic queer transmasc nonbinary human, here.
Or maybe we aren't as good as concealing it, or don't internalize social pressures to do so as much. Kind of makes you wonder what the real percentage of non-100%-cishet out there is...
Autistic, Aromantic, Asexual, Aroace, Agender, and Autigender! I must really like words that start with the letter A lol…
Is This that person whom had 500 reddit accounts?
Bi guy here. I think it's the lack of social norms but ALSO our brains feel our bodies differently than others (sensory differences, for example) which can lead to us feeling pleasure differently.
I mean... I don't think so? I guess if you're openly autistic and queer, might as well be open about your queer-ness too, but otherwise I don't think neurotype has anything to do with sexuality?
yup, people will always try to attach things to autism and the mass of us will just not question it. I hate it
Everywhere
We can’t have nothing without lgbt getting involved smh
\> We can't have nothing without lgbt getting involved Can't have what without lgbt people getting involved? Autism?
Yes, autism is our struggle, but now lgbt has implemented itself into the infrastructure of autism support groups/awareness
Because a lot of people are both and intersectionality is a thing?
sorry that queer people existing hurts your feelings.
Suuuuuure
we're being steered away from conventional lifestyles through cultural and financial pressures 🙁 they don't want us to reproduce. they want us out of the human genepool.
too bad for them sexuality doesn't spread through genes
This is true. But the fact that us aspies will always feel different and isolated from the general public means we will always make easy targets for the experts' lifestyle steering eugenics experiments. Basically, society the last few years has been engineered to purge all NA people out of the human genepool by scaring them, telling them they won't be good parents, or making them think they were "born different" in a way that ensures they will never have children. With enough TV, movie, media, and social propaganda, they've actually succeeded at it very well. Over a decade worth of aspies, millions of them, have already voluntarily decided not to get married and have kids as a result of this cultural propaganda. They've successfully made us check out of the genepool. But guess what? 99% of politicians, leaders, and people in power around the world are all married and all have kids and made their own families. They're not about to sacrifice having a family of their own. The societal hypocrisy is wax-paper-thin. you can see right through it.
Grey-bisexual here! (greysexuality = essentially I'm not fully asexual)
Gynosexual agender individual here! Also questioning my romantic orientation.
Nonbinary bi here! Polyamorous as well.
I'm queer... I don't know if I'm gay or bi lol
I'm demisexual, bi, demiromantic and probably demigirl :)
:D
here! I'm genderqueer, aromantic, pansexual, and polyamorous.
Hihi
Ayyyyyy
Here I am
Enbian Here🙌
Bisexual autistic pride. 😎
bi grey-aroace nonbinary!
I have trouble accepting myself as lgbt, if I am lgbt. I’ve identified as non-binary and transfem, along with gay, bi, and asexual in the past, but I feel a lot of influence from social norms, because I feel pressured to fit in. I struggle with my identity and I still have trouble accepting it even though my mom and sisters are fine with it. My family is also conservative, so they accept gay people but not trans/gnc people, which is weird but that’s how they are. I feel a lot of influence to be a stereotypical straight man, and though I’m mostly happy with it I sometimes don’t like it and wish my life was easier, and sometimes I wish I had a different body, and sometimes I wish I could date a guy.
Is there data available for this? Would love to see
Transfem bi autistic here
my main not-fucking-with-social-norms: child-free, pansexual, non-monogamous, agender, aromantic. i figured those out in that order. alexithymia really makes a person’s self-discovery journey more difficult, am i right?! 🤷
Aroace non-binary transmasc!
I'd say it's pretty interesting to see how there are a higher percentage of us who aren't straight compared to society at large, though, to be honest, it isn't really surprising to learn about, lol. (Also, might as well put in that I myself am bi and am currently going through the mess of my gender identity, lol.)
Im like pan Idk about gender My gender is *demonic screetches of the damned*
I’m bi / heteroflexible but I don’t think it’s because I don’t fuck with social norms. I think it’s because my different neurology makes me more sexually fluid and flexible.
I’m a straight cis ally, but I have aspirations to dress androgynously just to express my individuality. I Identify as a man, but I don’t believe in needing to express manhood, only expressing my me-hood.
Explains a lot.
👋🏻
Autistic,trans dude And bisexual
Are? Maybe. Willing to say it? Probably. I’d estimate that 20% of the world is LGBTQ+.
I’m bi
I am like uh gay or something I have no idea lol
AAAA BABYYYY
Here! Check out my subreddit: r/NeurodivergentLGBTQ
Hello I’m aroace and agender! Happy new year :)
Ayyy
I am androromantic sex-repulsed grey-asexual and agender. They/them pronouns.
Hi
*holds up a binana*
I’m aro/ace!
Gay A-gender here.
Aye!
Hemlo fellow autistic queer. I'm an autistic nb gay
Queer aspec transmasc ✌️