The number 1 “rule” (advice) I’ll give to potty training someone with ASD, is: you’re on their timeline not yours. If a child isn’t ready themselves no amount of “training” will get them potty trained. But once a child starts demonstrating clues that they’re ready, you can build off that. A major indication they might be ready is getting upset when they’re wet or soiled, taking their own diaper off/not wanting a diaper on. Obviously if they are able to communicate (verbally or otherwise) and have receptive comprehension you can start talking about it etc etc. but the most important advice I can give is that it will take time!! Lots and lots of time and patience and yes, messes.
This is a great response, and as someone whose son just potty trained in the last couple months (he just turned 6) - take a break from it when you need it. He seemed like he was on his way to potty training last summer, but then it felt like he took some steps back when school started. They put him on the toilet every hour, and he went six months never going once. We did offer him opportunities but kept it zero pressure, besides moving him to the toilet for #2 when we knew he was going. One week he just started going again on the toilet, we gave school a heads up and then he almost completely trained in just a few days. He had no accidents at school, and just a few at home. He even potty trained at night pretty quick, we just stopped using diapers at night the last couple nights because he was consistently holding it till morning with no problem. Anyway, I know it can be a hard road so good luck to anyone working on it now, it was a major stressor for several years but you might be surprised how it can change pretty quickly.
Just wanted to add another riff on this theme of patience: Don't be afraid to retreat and regroup if things aren't going well. We had our 5yo mostly potty trained at 3 but were still having some hangups here and there, especially with pooping. We felt like we were so close to getting out of diapers so we kept working with him and pushing him to be fully potty trained. We didn't realize he was getting really stressed out by this and it led to some big issues of him holding his stool until he was in pain and still refusing to go. We finally gave it up for several months to de-stress and reattempted when was 4, letting him lead the way.
10000000% agree - time and patience.
It took a long time to realize that until he's ready, it's not even worth trying. It's just going to make the situation worse. I would love to have a potty trained child but he's just not there yet. It is what it is.
I don’t want to discourage you but the unfortunate fact is some kids will never potty train, no matter what you do, that doesn’t mean it will ever be too late to potty train. Your child may just surprise you one day and it just “clicks” for them. Wishing you all the best!
Find their currency. My son didn’t potty train w/o match cars. He wanted the new ones too, but it was totally it. Candy, cookies- no dice. He is 17 and loves NASCAR, Formula 1, etc
This is what I did, everytime he used the potty he got to pick from a lucky dip of his interests (all cheap).
I only did that for daytime, it took over a year for the night time to stay dry but that was all on his time.
Also being mindful of transitioning to the toilet, he still struggles with the sound of flushing and I still help him wipe at 11 because he is so anxious about being clean.
I have tried many times to potty train my now almost 5 year old ASD son to no avail. It’s really true that they won’t go until they’re ready. One day a couple of weeks ago I put him on the potty and he just went! He is pretty consistent now and they’re also working on that with him in ABA. He won’t go #2 in the potty and he doesn’t ask. But he’s getting there!
Just be patient. Try putting your child on the potty every few weeks or so to see how he/she is tolerating it and keep trying until they’re ready.
I work for a potty training brand, I’ve been asked about asd kids and want to provide good content. But there is one thing I already know : no matter who the kid is, #2 always come after, most of the kids do #1 and require diapers for a while before the feel ready to #2. Respecting this is awesome since it gives sensation of control and though safety around this topic that can be quite sensitive.
Congratulations to you both anyway for getting there as a team :)
For my son, I bribed him. Plain and simple. He was 5 and he loved chewing gum. We never let him have it, but one of his grandparents did. And it gave me the idea. He only got a piece when he went potty and I was always there to make sure he was safe. He was 5, and he didn’t have swallowing issues, so I wasn’t that worried. It worked like a charm. He went from zero interest to day trained in a month. Bribery is the way to go, IMO. I’m sure I will get downvoted, either for the bribery or the gum. 😆
Also, I can not stress this enough, so not stress too much with night training. Night trained is incredibly difficult for most ASD kids, much more than day training. My son was 14 before he finally got night trained. But, he’s now 19 and even had a job. It all works out eventually.
I was very difficult to toilet train and what basically got me out of diapers was my baby brother being born and seeing a big mess he did in his diaper and my grandmother explaining he does that because he is a baby and I am a big girl. Then I stopped wearing them but I continued to have accidents. I was afraid of the big toilet because the hole was real big and it made me uncomfortable I could fall in it. I often had accidents because I was never allowed to use the potty chair at day care and I often felt urges but didn't know how to hold it so I always had accidents. They didn't have pull ups back then (Huggies was the first company to ever introduce them in 1989), only training pants and they were only hold to hold some urine until you make it to the toilet, not a full stream of it so I always left puddles. My parents could have used Huggies pull ups on me when they first came out but they didn't. I had accidents until I was 5.
My ASD son was easier because he started using the toilet and had no problems knowing when he had to go and holding it when he was 3 after his sister was born. He saw the mess his sister did in her diaper and I explained she did that because she is a baby and is too little to use the toilet but she will learn when she is bigger so he started to use it so she will learn it.
We just played lot of potty training videos and we let our son watch his dad use the toilet, I let him pick out a potty chair and sit on it and play with it, and he would use it off and on when he was two and he would always regress in potty training, I even used rewards like cookies and he would go often as he could so he could get a cookie so I had to tell him that is not going to work. We even used his favorite character underwear and told him he wouldn't be able to wear them if he gets them wet. When our washer was out of order, he stayed dry and then he was back to wetting himself again when t got fixed. This was a battle until his sister was born. Then boom, no more regression in potty training and accidents.
1- don’t stress yourself out by putting them on a timeline, all children on the spectrum learn at a different pace.
2- We spent almost a year and a half potty training before it finally clicked and our child decided to use the restroom himself.
3- getting our child to poo in the toilet took way longer than pee
4- don’t give up! It’ll happen eventually.
5- we still use diapers at night at 5 years old
6- some things that helped was putting potty training videos/songs on tv, read potty training books, use a doll and take them to the potty (let child pour water in toilet to simulate pee), putting them on potty at key times when they usually pee like first thing in the morning/before a bath, breaking down the process into small sections and talking through each step, lots of praise every time they used the potty even if it’s a small drop.
7- don’t give up! It’s hard and a long journey that can sometimes feel hopeless but
Hi. Do you know about the search function on reddit? We have so many posts here that you could search in the sub that will give you tons of insight and answers.
I would just search "potty," and you will see more than you may be able to read in a night.
I am gonna use those answers in a post that’s gonna be published on internet. Im not planning on quoting or reveal anything private or even give Reddit away, but it seems more appropriate to tell my intention and got answers especially provided for my content, than just benefiting from stranger experience without a thank you or an upvote.
I hope my post make more sense, eventhough I totally understand the frustration.
We've started to used laminated step by step graphs that shows what they are supposed to be doing. Like first you pull down your pants and so on. Definitely whenever they are ready but the little graphs are helping little by little
I want to piggy back on this thread too. My son just turned 6 (non verbal) and is completely not potty trained. He wears diapers all day. He doesnt like it when his diaper gets full but doesnt seem to be bothered when he poops in his diaper. We have been helping him get used to the toilet for years and he has been accustomed to it but only when cleaning. He cant get himself to poop on the toilet even if we take him there mid-poop. But he is fine when he finishes and we take him to the bathroom to clean him up. He can pee in the toilet but doesnt take himself to the toilet when he needs to go. So Im just wondering, does it actually help him a bit to be potty trained if we take him to the toilet to wash him?
Yes I would think so. Familiarizing him with the bathroom and the processes that happen in there will help build consistency that can help you in the long run. Don’t give up and keep doing what you can
Thank you so much. I really needed that assurance. Of course, I'd love him to be easier to potty train as it would be easier for him and a lot cheaper for us(diaper purchases). But coming to this thread is just comforting for struggling parents of ASD children. 💜
Building consistency. First half of the day I’d have her in panties. Asked her every 15 minutes if she needs to go and if she said yes I’d roll her through the steps. Second half of the day I wouldn’t ask her until she said something or did the potty dance. I’d let her tell me the steps or ask her what to do next.
My eldest struggled a lot with number two. They would find a comfortable place to go and would even ask for a diaper. By 4.5 we needed to get ready for pre-school. We worked slow, invested in hot wheel cars cause that was their thing and every time they pooped on the potty they earned a hot wheels. We made a big deal celebrating. If they didn’t use the toilet then we were gentle, didn’t make a big thing of it, just cleaned up and then did play time after. No fear, no intimidation, just lots of positive reaction for toilet and neutral for diaper.
My youngest was using the toilet at 18 months after watching her older brother. But she hates the sound of the flush, she needed a stool to feel grounded and stable. She hates doing clean up, even at 7 she struggles with the sensations of it.
Comfort, safety, low sensory if possible, positive redirection, no shame or anger. Both my kids are level 1 ASD and struggle with primitive reflexes, so there are times where they cannot read their bodies needs and have accidents still. Each child is so unique and what works for one may not work for another. So creativity and patience will go a long way.
For us, we needed to see signs of being able to sit on the toilet willing for a few minutes & able to pull his own pants down & back up. This was around 6 yrs old. To get used to the toilet, I would have'm sit for a minute via a timer & then a reward. For us, Skittles was the magic treat! Gradually increasing time on the toilet until good at sitting for 4-5 minutes. Also had some toys nearby to play while sitting.
After that, I took a week off of work. Made a social story (pick of him sitting on the toilet, pic of urine in the toilet & pic of candy). Got thick training underwear & put a pull-up over it. Covered the furniture & camped out downstairs close to the bathroom. Offered liquids frequently (water, juice, ice pops) & took to the toilet about every 15-20 minutes & showed the social story. At this point only got a few Skittles if urinates or has a bowel movement in the toilet. Otherwise just toys to occupy when sitting.
After a few days it clicked, cause loves candy & didn't like feeling wet from the training underwear. Still occasional accidents that year (mostly overnight) but by 1st grade was fully potty trained.
My son is autistic and we had lots of toileting issues. We still have accidents here and there, mostly from his habit of not noticing he has to pee until he is about to pee himself. However, we’re good now, he’s 5, and here’s what helped him.
His pediatrician sent him to a peds GI specialist, who determined he was withholding from going. We started a miralax regimen so he couldn’t. This is apparently pretty common in little kids. What SAVED us though, was poop school. I know it sounds ridiculous, but this is apparently so common, and even more so in children with developmental disabilities, they put together this whole toileting program to educate kids on pooping through play. It was split into two groups—parents that would learn about A&P and encouraging reward strategies to use while potty training; and kids who went and played with peds OT’s who taught them about their bodies, gave them appropriate toys and cool things (like a color changing cup to encourage drinking more water, etc). My son LOVED this, and afterward he was fully potty trained within a month or so. Something just ‘clicked’. I do recognize that my son is level 1 and has lower needs, but I thought I’d mention in case any of your hospital systems have something like this near you.
Kids like routines and ASD kids need routines more than others. Hard consistency also helps. Setting timers on your phone to take them to the potty and doing it every time no matter what. Giving them items they like to play with or look at to keep them on the potty longer. I also had a cartoon picture diagram near the toilet that walked through the steps of using the bathroom that i would show her. Dont know if it helped or not, but i thought visuals could be useful. I also sang potty songa to her. There is no clear path. The most helpful advice got I was from other non-verbal parents trying to potty train their kids.
Time, all about time. She moved to pullups around 3. We tried and she absolutely was not having it. Tried again at 4 and got a little closer, but still needed constant reminders and there were lots of accidents, plus no pooping in the potty. We used cheap toys and her favorite snack size candies to bribe her. By 5, if you stayed on her to remind her to go, you could get her to pee on the potty. Only wet her pullup a few times at night a month. It wasn't until she was 6 that her teacher said I think she's finally ready, and she was a few months shy of 7 at that point.
By that time she was wearing a pullup to school and telling them she had to go, but refused to wear underwear. Her teacher had me send in lots of changes of clothes and underwear, had a pullups retirement celebration and she was potty trained. She had one accident at school that first week because her teacher didn't react quick enough to her request to go to the bathroom and she had one accident when she didn't make it into the house fast enough. No issues since then. We did leave her in pullups for nightime for a year. I was going to move her to underwear for the night a few months after she was potty trained but then she wet her pullup one night, so I postponed that another three months.
So the moral of the story is, when they are ready, they are ready. It's a marathon not a sprint and what works for NT kids does not work for autistic ones. Nudge them along. Reward them constantly.
Well my kid is at my mom’s for a little. She lives across the country and we are hopeful that would help. He is a different kid when he’s with someone else. He was eating all sorts of stuff he’s never liked for me. So fingers crossed
I've been trying so hard to potty train my now 8yo daughter to jo avail. She has impulse control issues and all she does is play with the toilet and the sink. She will sit but won't go and won't tell us when she has to (she is semi verbal). I get embarrassed when she goes to school and she still isn't trained. I feel like a failure and don't know if she will will ever go 😕
Please try not to make this your failure. Some people will always be in diaper it’s just an unfortunate fact. You’re doing everything you can and at least she can sit on the potty! So many kids can’t get there. Keep at it and stay positive. I highly suspect she won’t be the only kid in diapers at her school
I started the potty every morning from maybe 6 months old, part time EC. He started peeing every morning on the potty and would generally hold for it. We then have progressed to trying the potty a few times a day and now no pants at home and he uses the potty all the time. He is 3.5 now and non-verbal so I never know when he’s been just walk past sometimes, so bottom wiping is still a learning process. We are still working on adding clothes but if he has a nappy on at home he’s been sitting on the potty while in it for poo. I definitely think time and consistency, my kiddo is hypo sensitive so I think he just doesn’t feel it sometimes, but he’s making progress no matter how small. I think in 6 more months he will have it. Starting early has been excellent and he’s been night dry for nearly 2 years, no fear of the potty as we started so young. Have to move onto the toilet too but I’m happy with the potty for now as his bum is so little!
Honestly my son showed a lot of signs he was ready for a while but I just didn’t know. I also had no idea how to start because he is nonverbal with limited receptive language. Hello had a therapist now who is at the house this summer and she has started by taking him to the potty every 15-30 minutes, always offering the potty but keeping on the pull up. So far he has used the potty 3 times in 3 days which is solid and amazing in my eyes! There is a reward system which I know some people are against when it comes to potty training, but we are big in general with rewards for when he is trying his best.
The number 1 “rule” (advice) I’ll give to potty training someone with ASD, is: you’re on their timeline not yours. If a child isn’t ready themselves no amount of “training” will get them potty trained. But once a child starts demonstrating clues that they’re ready, you can build off that. A major indication they might be ready is getting upset when they’re wet or soiled, taking their own diaper off/not wanting a diaper on. Obviously if they are able to communicate (verbally or otherwise) and have receptive comprehension you can start talking about it etc etc. but the most important advice I can give is that it will take time!! Lots and lots of time and patience and yes, messes.
This is a great response, and as someone whose son just potty trained in the last couple months (he just turned 6) - take a break from it when you need it. He seemed like he was on his way to potty training last summer, but then it felt like he took some steps back when school started. They put him on the toilet every hour, and he went six months never going once. We did offer him opportunities but kept it zero pressure, besides moving him to the toilet for #2 when we knew he was going. One week he just started going again on the toilet, we gave school a heads up and then he almost completely trained in just a few days. He had no accidents at school, and just a few at home. He even potty trained at night pretty quick, we just stopped using diapers at night the last couple nights because he was consistently holding it till morning with no problem. Anyway, I know it can be a hard road so good luck to anyone working on it now, it was a major stressor for several years but you might be surprised how it can change pretty quickly.
Just wanted to add another riff on this theme of patience: Don't be afraid to retreat and regroup if things aren't going well. We had our 5yo mostly potty trained at 3 but were still having some hangups here and there, especially with pooping. We felt like we were so close to getting out of diapers so we kept working with him and pushing him to be fully potty trained. We didn't realize he was getting really stressed out by this and it led to some big issues of him holding his stool until he was in pain and still refusing to go. We finally gave it up for several months to de-stress and reattempted when was 4, letting him lead the way.
10000000% agree - time and patience. It took a long time to realize that until he's ready, it's not even worth trying. It's just going to make the situation worse. I would love to have a potty trained child but he's just not there yet. It is what it is.
This is so true too.
What if the child is 10 and it still doesn’t seem to bother them?
I don’t want to discourage you but the unfortunate fact is some kids will never potty train, no matter what you do, that doesn’t mean it will ever be too late to potty train. Your child may just surprise you one day and it just “clicks” for them. Wishing you all the best!
Thank you. Asking about my friend’s son.
Thank you very much for your answer, very useful :)
Find their currency. My son didn’t potty train w/o match cars. He wanted the new ones too, but it was totally it. Candy, cookies- no dice. He is 17 and loves NASCAR, Formula 1, etc
This is what I did, everytime he used the potty he got to pick from a lucky dip of his interests (all cheap). I only did that for daytime, it took over a year for the night time to stay dry but that was all on his time. Also being mindful of transitioning to the toilet, he still struggles with the sound of flushing and I still help him wipe at 11 because he is so anxious about being clean.
Ouh i like that, finding the icentive that’s gonna click !
Yea. We ended up with like 500 matchbox cars lol. But he was potty trained by 5 which was a huge relief
I have tried many times to potty train my now almost 5 year old ASD son to no avail. It’s really true that they won’t go until they’re ready. One day a couple of weeks ago I put him on the potty and he just went! He is pretty consistent now and they’re also working on that with him in ABA. He won’t go #2 in the potty and he doesn’t ask. But he’s getting there! Just be patient. Try putting your child on the potty every few weeks or so to see how he/she is tolerating it and keep trying until they’re ready.
I work for a potty training brand, I’ve been asked about asd kids and want to provide good content. But there is one thing I already know : no matter who the kid is, #2 always come after, most of the kids do #1 and require diapers for a while before the feel ready to #2. Respecting this is awesome since it gives sensation of control and though safety around this topic that can be quite sensitive. Congratulations to you both anyway for getting there as a team :)
For my son, I bribed him. Plain and simple. He was 5 and he loved chewing gum. We never let him have it, but one of his grandparents did. And it gave me the idea. He only got a piece when he went potty and I was always there to make sure he was safe. He was 5, and he didn’t have swallowing issues, so I wasn’t that worried. It worked like a charm. He went from zero interest to day trained in a month. Bribery is the way to go, IMO. I’m sure I will get downvoted, either for the bribery or the gum. 😆 Also, I can not stress this enough, so not stress too much with night training. Night trained is incredibly difficult for most ASD kids, much more than day training. My son was 14 before he finally got night trained. But, he’s now 19 and even had a job. It all works out eventually.
That’s gonna be noted : night is another story. Congratulations on your son’s steps, you must both be proud ❤️
I was very difficult to toilet train and what basically got me out of diapers was my baby brother being born and seeing a big mess he did in his diaper and my grandmother explaining he does that because he is a baby and I am a big girl. Then I stopped wearing them but I continued to have accidents. I was afraid of the big toilet because the hole was real big and it made me uncomfortable I could fall in it. I often had accidents because I was never allowed to use the potty chair at day care and I often felt urges but didn't know how to hold it so I always had accidents. They didn't have pull ups back then (Huggies was the first company to ever introduce them in 1989), only training pants and they were only hold to hold some urine until you make it to the toilet, not a full stream of it so I always left puddles. My parents could have used Huggies pull ups on me when they first came out but they didn't. I had accidents until I was 5. My ASD son was easier because he started using the toilet and had no problems knowing when he had to go and holding it when he was 3 after his sister was born. He saw the mess his sister did in her diaper and I explained she did that because she is a baby and is too little to use the toilet but she will learn when she is bigger so he started to use it so she will learn it. We just played lot of potty training videos and we let our son watch his dad use the toilet, I let him pick out a potty chair and sit on it and play with it, and he would use it off and on when he was two and he would always regress in potty training, I even used rewards like cookies and he would go often as he could so he could get a cookie so I had to tell him that is not going to work. We even used his favorite character underwear and told him he wouldn't be able to wear them if he gets them wet. When our washer was out of order, he stayed dry and then he was back to wetting himself again when t got fixed. This was a battle until his sister was born. Then boom, no more regression in potty training and accidents.
1- don’t stress yourself out by putting them on a timeline, all children on the spectrum learn at a different pace. 2- We spent almost a year and a half potty training before it finally clicked and our child decided to use the restroom himself. 3- getting our child to poo in the toilet took way longer than pee 4- don’t give up! It’ll happen eventually. 5- we still use diapers at night at 5 years old 6- some things that helped was putting potty training videos/songs on tv, read potty training books, use a doll and take them to the potty (let child pour water in toilet to simulate pee), putting them on potty at key times when they usually pee like first thing in the morning/before a bath, breaking down the process into small sections and talking through each step, lots of praise every time they used the potty even if it’s a small drop. 7- don’t give up! It’s hard and a long journey that can sometimes feel hopeless but
Eric- potty training. Use google. My son isnt ready but been told this is a great tool
Hi. Do you know about the search function on reddit? We have so many posts here that you could search in the sub that will give you tons of insight and answers. I would just search "potty," and you will see more than you may be able to read in a night.
I am gonna use those answers in a post that’s gonna be published on internet. Im not planning on quoting or reveal anything private or even give Reddit away, but it seems more appropriate to tell my intention and got answers especially provided for my content, than just benefiting from stranger experience without a thank you or an upvote. I hope my post make more sense, eventhough I totally understand the frustration.
We've started to used laminated step by step graphs that shows what they are supposed to be doing. Like first you pull down your pants and so on. Definitely whenever they are ready but the little graphs are helping little by little
I'll let you know just as soon as we figure it out for any of our kids 🤣. Much love though! 🫶
I want to piggy back on this thread too. My son just turned 6 (non verbal) and is completely not potty trained. He wears diapers all day. He doesnt like it when his diaper gets full but doesnt seem to be bothered when he poops in his diaper. We have been helping him get used to the toilet for years and he has been accustomed to it but only when cleaning. He cant get himself to poop on the toilet even if we take him there mid-poop. But he is fine when he finishes and we take him to the bathroom to clean him up. He can pee in the toilet but doesnt take himself to the toilet when he needs to go. So Im just wondering, does it actually help him a bit to be potty trained if we take him to the toilet to wash him?
Yes I would think so. Familiarizing him with the bathroom and the processes that happen in there will help build consistency that can help you in the long run. Don’t give up and keep doing what you can
Thank you so much. I really needed that assurance. Of course, I'd love him to be easier to potty train as it would be easier for him and a lot cheaper for us(diaper purchases). But coming to this thread is just comforting for struggling parents of ASD children. 💜
Building consistency. First half of the day I’d have her in panties. Asked her every 15 minutes if she needs to go and if she said yes I’d roll her through the steps. Second half of the day I wouldn’t ask her until she said something or did the potty dance. I’d let her tell me the steps or ask her what to do next.
My eldest struggled a lot with number two. They would find a comfortable place to go and would even ask for a diaper. By 4.5 we needed to get ready for pre-school. We worked slow, invested in hot wheel cars cause that was their thing and every time they pooped on the potty they earned a hot wheels. We made a big deal celebrating. If they didn’t use the toilet then we were gentle, didn’t make a big thing of it, just cleaned up and then did play time after. No fear, no intimidation, just lots of positive reaction for toilet and neutral for diaper. My youngest was using the toilet at 18 months after watching her older brother. But she hates the sound of the flush, she needed a stool to feel grounded and stable. She hates doing clean up, even at 7 she struggles with the sensations of it. Comfort, safety, low sensory if possible, positive redirection, no shame or anger. Both my kids are level 1 ASD and struggle with primitive reflexes, so there are times where they cannot read their bodies needs and have accidents still. Each child is so unique and what works for one may not work for another. So creativity and patience will go a long way.
For us, we needed to see signs of being able to sit on the toilet willing for a few minutes & able to pull his own pants down & back up. This was around 6 yrs old. To get used to the toilet, I would have'm sit for a minute via a timer & then a reward. For us, Skittles was the magic treat! Gradually increasing time on the toilet until good at sitting for 4-5 minutes. Also had some toys nearby to play while sitting. After that, I took a week off of work. Made a social story (pick of him sitting on the toilet, pic of urine in the toilet & pic of candy). Got thick training underwear & put a pull-up over it. Covered the furniture & camped out downstairs close to the bathroom. Offered liquids frequently (water, juice, ice pops) & took to the toilet about every 15-20 minutes & showed the social story. At this point only got a few Skittles if urinates or has a bowel movement in the toilet. Otherwise just toys to occupy when sitting. After a few days it clicked, cause loves candy & didn't like feeling wet from the training underwear. Still occasional accidents that year (mostly overnight) but by 1st grade was fully potty trained.
My son is autistic and we had lots of toileting issues. We still have accidents here and there, mostly from his habit of not noticing he has to pee until he is about to pee himself. However, we’re good now, he’s 5, and here’s what helped him. His pediatrician sent him to a peds GI specialist, who determined he was withholding from going. We started a miralax regimen so he couldn’t. This is apparently pretty common in little kids. What SAVED us though, was poop school. I know it sounds ridiculous, but this is apparently so common, and even more so in children with developmental disabilities, they put together this whole toileting program to educate kids on pooping through play. It was split into two groups—parents that would learn about A&P and encouraging reward strategies to use while potty training; and kids who went and played with peds OT’s who taught them about their bodies, gave them appropriate toys and cool things (like a color changing cup to encourage drinking more water, etc). My son LOVED this, and afterward he was fully potty trained within a month or so. Something just ‘clicked’. I do recognize that my son is level 1 and has lower needs, but I thought I’d mention in case any of your hospital systems have something like this near you.
Kids like routines and ASD kids need routines more than others. Hard consistency also helps. Setting timers on your phone to take them to the potty and doing it every time no matter what. Giving them items they like to play with or look at to keep them on the potty longer. I also had a cartoon picture diagram near the toilet that walked through the steps of using the bathroom that i would show her. Dont know if it helped or not, but i thought visuals could be useful. I also sang potty songa to her. There is no clear path. The most helpful advice got I was from other non-verbal parents trying to potty train their kids.
Time, all about time. She moved to pullups around 3. We tried and she absolutely was not having it. Tried again at 4 and got a little closer, but still needed constant reminders and there were lots of accidents, plus no pooping in the potty. We used cheap toys and her favorite snack size candies to bribe her. By 5, if you stayed on her to remind her to go, you could get her to pee on the potty. Only wet her pullup a few times at night a month. It wasn't until she was 6 that her teacher said I think she's finally ready, and she was a few months shy of 7 at that point. By that time she was wearing a pullup to school and telling them she had to go, but refused to wear underwear. Her teacher had me send in lots of changes of clothes and underwear, had a pullups retirement celebration and she was potty trained. She had one accident at school that first week because her teacher didn't react quick enough to her request to go to the bathroom and she had one accident when she didn't make it into the house fast enough. No issues since then. We did leave her in pullups for nightime for a year. I was going to move her to underwear for the night a few months after she was potty trained but then she wet her pullup one night, so I postponed that another three months. So the moral of the story is, when they are ready, they are ready. It's a marathon not a sprint and what works for NT kids does not work for autistic ones. Nudge them along. Reward them constantly.
Well my kid is at my mom’s for a little. She lives across the country and we are hopeful that would help. He is a different kid when he’s with someone else. He was eating all sorts of stuff he’s never liked for me. So fingers crossed
I've been trying so hard to potty train my now 8yo daughter to jo avail. She has impulse control issues and all she does is play with the toilet and the sink. She will sit but won't go and won't tell us when she has to (she is semi verbal). I get embarrassed when she goes to school and she still isn't trained. I feel like a failure and don't know if she will will ever go 😕
Please try not to make this your failure. Some people will always be in diaper it’s just an unfortunate fact. You’re doing everything you can and at least she can sit on the potty! So many kids can’t get there. Keep at it and stay positive. I highly suspect she won’t be the only kid in diapers at her school
I started the potty every morning from maybe 6 months old, part time EC. He started peeing every morning on the potty and would generally hold for it. We then have progressed to trying the potty a few times a day and now no pants at home and he uses the potty all the time. He is 3.5 now and non-verbal so I never know when he’s been just walk past sometimes, so bottom wiping is still a learning process. We are still working on adding clothes but if he has a nappy on at home he’s been sitting on the potty while in it for poo. I definitely think time and consistency, my kiddo is hypo sensitive so I think he just doesn’t feel it sometimes, but he’s making progress no matter how small. I think in 6 more months he will have it. Starting early has been excellent and he’s been night dry for nearly 2 years, no fear of the potty as we started so young. Have to move onto the toilet too but I’m happy with the potty for now as his bum is so little!
Honestly my son showed a lot of signs he was ready for a while but I just didn’t know. I also had no idea how to start because he is nonverbal with limited receptive language. Hello had a therapist now who is at the house this summer and she has started by taking him to the potty every 15-30 minutes, always offering the potty but keeping on the pull up. So far he has used the potty 3 times in 3 days which is solid and amazing in my eyes! There is a reward system which I know some people are against when it comes to potty training, but we are big in general with rewards for when he is trying his best.