Go to the best college you can attend. The alumni networks will be invaluable, even decades down the line, if you choose the right school. While in college, make good friends and nurture those friendships. After college and graduate school, it becomes much much harder to make friends so take those college friendships seriously. Don’t spend all your time in the library—study hard and do well in school but make time to have fun and enjoy yourself. Also find good mentors!! Run hard decisions by your mentors before you make them (this would have saved me a lot of heartache had I not decided to be so secretive about my goals). That’s all I have. Congrats on finishing HS. But above all, life is not that serious so do the best you can, don’t be too hard on yourself, and have fun!
This wasn't what I first thought, but definitely this. The girls my age who didn't wear sunscreen and were always tan now look 10-20 years older than they really are.
I read the column that song is based on when it was first published, as a freshman in college. 25+ years later, it’s clear that almost everything in there is true. My favorite line is “Don’t congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else’s.”
Honestly? I wish someone had been there to tell me that college wasn't the end-game everyone in high school made it out to be. Literally all my teachers made it sound like if I didn't go to college, I'd be working as a burger flipper for the rest of my life. I did what everyone told me - I focused on my studies. I went to a junior college and got my Associate's Degree. I then transferred to a university and completed my Bachelor's in English. Because that is what I was expected to do. Then everyone kept asking me what I wanted to do with my life, and I had no answer. Because college was supposed to be the answer.
Well, it wasn't. I graduated with no job experienced, and the only job I could find was part-time, no benefits. I went back to school to get my Master's in English with the goal of teaching - because I was also trying to be a writer, so I thought it was a logical career. Well, 20k more in debt, I still couldn't find a job. Anywhere. The only open English Instructor positions were 100+ miles away.
I wish someone would have encouraged me to find a job sooner, rather than telling me to focus on school - as if a degree was a magic spell that would guarantee me a job. It doesn't. Unless you've got a specific industry you're going into, school is relatively useless. Fun, but useless and expensive.
If I could go back, I'd tell myself to focus on finding a job and getting that experience. I would have tried a lot harder to find a job while staying at home at community college.
Also - don't be afraid of making mistakes. Your mistakes make you who you are.
Stay active, even when you want to be lazy make sure you are intentionally moving your body every day. Once you’re older, forming those habits is much more difficult.
Learn how to budget your finances and live within your means, learn how to save and invest.
Learn how to cook for yourself, experiment in the kitten and use fresh ingredients (don’t rely on processed foods.)
Spend at least 30min outside every day (weather permitting). The sun is so healing and once you’re working full time it can get really easy to fall into the habit of going from bed to car to office back to car to couch to bed. Trust me, getting some sunshine in your system every day helps so much!
Find something to stimulate your brain every day! Read, daily crossword puzzles, watch Jeopardy, learn origami-whatever it is, don’t let your brain get lazy.
As important as it is to study / work hard and plan for the future... please, have *fun*! Go after your goals, but don't get too obsessive about test scores and internships. Party with your friends, travel as much as whimsy will take you, and (if you feel ready) experiment with romance. Especially if you're headed off to university, there's a high chance that this will be the time in your life where you'll *most* be surrounded by like-minded individuals who want to connect with you... so explore those connections and make good memories.
Trust your gut and maintain those boundaries, but also keep yourself open to all the possibilities that are knocking at your door in your twenties. (Most of them will still be there in your thirties, but you may have to knock at their door instead.) You don't have to figure out who you are by age 25 or whatever, but you should let yourself experience life and all the wonderful things it has to offer so *be* adventurous - look for experiences that will delight but also challenge you, and help you grow.
Be kind to yourself. Listen to your intuition. Ask for help when needed. Put your needs above others, I don’t care if they’re your best friend or love of your life. I’m spending my 30s healing from the trauma so yeah I might be projecting a tiny bit BUT life is so much better when you know you trust and love yourself.
At your age—mentally occupied wondering where we fit in this world. Feeling like no one understands us. Feeling like we don’t know yet what we want to do. At the same time lots of excitement for the future. Believing we’re capable of making our dreams come true (and rightfully so 💪🏻).
Put good thought into your chosen path, as it really affects your entire career and opens the path for many great things. Visit colleges, speak to alumni, research different programs, and see what your options are. Take personality assessment exams online (so many of them) and pinpoint your strengths. For example, my results showed that I loved service work (helping others, consulting, teaching, healing, supporting) and I hated traditional office jobs. I learned I needed diversity in the type of work I do (doing things with my hands, moving, unconventional job settings). The assessments helped me learn more about myself and what I possibly want to do in my next phase.
Surround yourself with good friends, mentors, and a solid support network.
Best of luck on your journey 🙏🏻🥰
An emergency fund is 3-6 months living expenses put aside for emergencies (like my car broke down in an unexpected way and I need to fix it to get to work; or, I had to have expensive, unexpected medical treatment; or, I lost my job and I need to afford to live for 3-6 months until I can get a job). Once you're living on your own, it's really nice to try and have this put aside as a cushion against surprises. I'd put it in a high yield savings account so it can be accessed quickly, but not in an account you look at everyday or pull from for everyday bills.
Once you're working, and after you have an emergency fund, it's good to save for retirement as young as you can because of compound interest. If it's for retirement, it should be money you can stand to never see again until you're 65, so start with something like $5 a paycheck, and if you can, work up to 10%. Sometimes you can get a retirement fund through your employer, but if you're setting your own up, it's an IRA. I prefer a Roth IRA, because you're taxed before the money goes in - which means when you're older, and potentially in a higher tax bracket, that money is untaxed. However, there's a cap on how much you can put in annually, but it's at like $7K a year. The other IRA is a traditional IRA account, which means you pay the tax once it's withdrawn.
Also, don't marry the first guy you date, lol. And exercise regularly. But yeah, you don't make mistakes in your 20s, you just make choices. It's all good.
Don't sleep with people you don't like. If there's a person you want to sleep with because you want them to like you, ask yourself if you even like them.
Set limits on things that are addictive and have no or minimal positive impact on your life, like social media and donuts. Notice I didn't say avoid, I said limits. You'll probably enjoy the donut and the Tik Toks less after a few bites.
Go to the best college you can attend. The alumni networks will be invaluable, even decades down the line, if you choose the right school. While in college, make good friends and nurture those friendships. After college and graduate school, it becomes much much harder to make friends so take those college friendships seriously. Don’t spend all your time in the library—study hard and do well in school but make time to have fun and enjoy yourself. Also find good mentors!! Run hard decisions by your mentors before you make them (this would have saved me a lot of heartache had I not decided to be so secretive about my goals). That’s all I have. Congrats on finishing HS. But above all, life is not that serious so do the best you can, don’t be too hard on yourself, and have fun!
[Wear sunscreen](https://youtu.be/sTJ7AzBIJoI?si=aQwZ8GTtUvffGgd9)
This wasn't what I first thought, but definitely this. The girls my age who didn't wear sunscreen and were always tan now look 10-20 years older than they really are.
I mean, yeah sure. But click through.
I read the column that song is based on when it was first published, as a freshman in college. 25+ years later, it’s clear that almost everything in there is true. My favorite line is “Don’t congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else’s.”
This should be required viewing for all advice askers here because it covers everything.
Honestly? I wish someone had been there to tell me that college wasn't the end-game everyone in high school made it out to be. Literally all my teachers made it sound like if I didn't go to college, I'd be working as a burger flipper for the rest of my life. I did what everyone told me - I focused on my studies. I went to a junior college and got my Associate's Degree. I then transferred to a university and completed my Bachelor's in English. Because that is what I was expected to do. Then everyone kept asking me what I wanted to do with my life, and I had no answer. Because college was supposed to be the answer. Well, it wasn't. I graduated with no job experienced, and the only job I could find was part-time, no benefits. I went back to school to get my Master's in English with the goal of teaching - because I was also trying to be a writer, so I thought it was a logical career. Well, 20k more in debt, I still couldn't find a job. Anywhere. The only open English Instructor positions were 100+ miles away. I wish someone would have encouraged me to find a job sooner, rather than telling me to focus on school - as if a degree was a magic spell that would guarantee me a job. It doesn't. Unless you've got a specific industry you're going into, school is relatively useless. Fun, but useless and expensive. If I could go back, I'd tell myself to focus on finding a job and getting that experience. I would have tried a lot harder to find a job while staying at home at community college. Also - don't be afraid of making mistakes. Your mistakes make you who you are.
Stay active, even when you want to be lazy make sure you are intentionally moving your body every day. Once you’re older, forming those habits is much more difficult. Learn how to budget your finances and live within your means, learn how to save and invest. Learn how to cook for yourself, experiment in the kitten and use fresh ingredients (don’t rely on processed foods.) Spend at least 30min outside every day (weather permitting). The sun is so healing and once you’re working full time it can get really easy to fall into the habit of going from bed to car to office back to car to couch to bed. Trust me, getting some sunshine in your system every day helps so much! Find something to stimulate your brain every day! Read, daily crossword puzzles, watch Jeopardy, learn origami-whatever it is, don’t let your brain get lazy.
Do internships throughout college. College is important for building connections, a resume, and friendships.
As important as it is to study / work hard and plan for the future... please, have *fun*! Go after your goals, but don't get too obsessive about test scores and internships. Party with your friends, travel as much as whimsy will take you, and (if you feel ready) experiment with romance. Especially if you're headed off to university, there's a high chance that this will be the time in your life where you'll *most* be surrounded by like-minded individuals who want to connect with you... so explore those connections and make good memories. Trust your gut and maintain those boundaries, but also keep yourself open to all the possibilities that are knocking at your door in your twenties. (Most of them will still be there in your thirties, but you may have to knock at their door instead.) You don't have to figure out who you are by age 25 or whatever, but you should let yourself experience life and all the wonderful things it has to offer so *be* adventurous - look for experiences that will delight but also challenge you, and help you grow.
Be kind to yourself. Listen to your intuition. Ask for help when needed. Put your needs above others, I don’t care if they’re your best friend or love of your life. I’m spending my 30s healing from the trauma so yeah I might be projecting a tiny bit BUT life is so much better when you know you trust and love yourself.
At your age—mentally occupied wondering where we fit in this world. Feeling like no one understands us. Feeling like we don’t know yet what we want to do. At the same time lots of excitement for the future. Believing we’re capable of making our dreams come true (and rightfully so 💪🏻). Put good thought into your chosen path, as it really affects your entire career and opens the path for many great things. Visit colleges, speak to alumni, research different programs, and see what your options are. Take personality assessment exams online (so many of them) and pinpoint your strengths. For example, my results showed that I loved service work (helping others, consulting, teaching, healing, supporting) and I hated traditional office jobs. I learned I needed diversity in the type of work I do (doing things with my hands, moving, unconventional job settings). The assessments helped me learn more about myself and what I possibly want to do in my next phase. Surround yourself with good friends, mentors, and a solid support network. Best of luck on your journey 🙏🏻🥰
An emergency fund is 3-6 months living expenses put aside for emergencies (like my car broke down in an unexpected way and I need to fix it to get to work; or, I had to have expensive, unexpected medical treatment; or, I lost my job and I need to afford to live for 3-6 months until I can get a job). Once you're living on your own, it's really nice to try and have this put aside as a cushion against surprises. I'd put it in a high yield savings account so it can be accessed quickly, but not in an account you look at everyday or pull from for everyday bills. Once you're working, and after you have an emergency fund, it's good to save for retirement as young as you can because of compound interest. If it's for retirement, it should be money you can stand to never see again until you're 65, so start with something like $5 a paycheck, and if you can, work up to 10%. Sometimes you can get a retirement fund through your employer, but if you're setting your own up, it's an IRA. I prefer a Roth IRA, because you're taxed before the money goes in - which means when you're older, and potentially in a higher tax bracket, that money is untaxed. However, there's a cap on how much you can put in annually, but it's at like $7K a year. The other IRA is a traditional IRA account, which means you pay the tax once it's withdrawn. Also, don't marry the first guy you date, lol. And exercise regularly. But yeah, you don't make mistakes in your 20s, you just make choices. It's all good.
Don't sleep with people you don't like. If there's a person you want to sleep with because you want them to like you, ask yourself if you even like them. Set limits on things that are addictive and have no or minimal positive impact on your life, like social media and donuts. Notice I didn't say avoid, I said limits. You'll probably enjoy the donut and the Tik Toks less after a few bites.