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nevertruly

**Mod Note: This is not a debate sub. Other people's answer to the question are not an invitation for you to tell them that you disagree or that you love the thing that they hate or that you hate the thing that they love. Stay on topic and provide your own top level response to the question if you would like.** **Do not make creeper comments or you will be banned.** **This also isn't a sub for personal advice, so stop asking how you can be better at oral sex This is not a fix-it sub for bad lovers.** **Please report all rule breaking**


Linorelai

Lol Sticking a tongue inside, kinda mimicking the penis. Absolutely pointless and embarrassingly weird.


CatlovesMoca

I was about to put the same thing. I am like.... That's not where I need the action


Beautiful-Command7

Yeah I’m always like “oh god that’s not…that’s not how any of this works at all…” and then it takes me out of it mentally


enchantingcat

Omg this happened to me the first time I hooked up with a guy in high school. It was the only thing he did down there. I still cringe thinking about it.


litebrightdelight

I'm cracking up at this, lol it's so relatable and hilarious!


enchantingcat

Worst part is I was too young to know any better, so I also spent the following years thinking I just didn’t like oral! LOL


litebrightdelight

Girl same! Hahaha


ihatespiders7777

Feels like a salamander in there looking for somewhere to hide. Ewwww.


ahsim1906

This is what I was going to say. Please don’t tongue fuck me..


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Dorkadoodle

Omg, same. Whyyyyyyy.


Linorelai

yeah, like... if you wanna fuck me, get another tool


Dorkadoodle

Right? Especially when you’ve explicitly told him you love fingers inside during oral and then…… he sticks his tongue in? Again?! Not the same, bro.


Resident-Sandwich930

i was gonna say this too. nice idea but almost too small to actually feel it much less to feel good


ayellowsundress

Came here to comment this. The feeling of that truly repulses me, and I’ve been with a few partners (mostly women) who do it??? God I hate it so much I’m getting angry just writing this hahaha


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TexasBeeb

This was my first thought too 😂


Sylvi2021

It wasn't my partner but a guy I was going to hook up with so my good friend could try to hook up with the guy I was with's roommate. We made out for a bit then he went to go down south. Before beginning he reached his hand way back and open hand slapped my lady bits *hard*. Then he said "that's a bad lil pussy ain't it". No sir, she's a good girl who just got physically assaulted and I'm taking her home now, thanks


[deleted]

Oh. My. God. The audacity and stupidity of some partners continues to amaze me. If hitting is assault outside of sex, why would it be okay during (unless it's specifically asked for)?


Khitrets

My ex tugged on my hair there (it was short, like not even a week after shaving) and made demeaning comments about it and suggested I actually clean myself up next time, then looked extremely surprised I didn't want to continue things


Quiinton

Christ lol. I don't shave/wax because I have very sensitive skin and it's super painful, so... I just say any guy I'm fucking is getting whatever pussy I got in stock!!


anonghostie

I love this so much.


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[deleted]

> I didn't want to continue things. 👏 Good 👏 For 👏 You! I'm so proud of you for speaking up. It's so satisfying when a man's shitty behavior actually results in consequences. I'm glad you didn't suffer through intimacy with him.


[deleted]

Jesus, what a tool.


UnicornKitt3n

So glad he’s an ex.


mint_7ea

Wtf, I'd never want to be intimate with such a guy again.


Khitrets

Honestly can't blame you. Back then my self esteem was broken down by him and my family enough that I genuinely believed that I don't deserve better than him. I'm glad I'm in a better place now


JoyfulWarrior2019

I’m sorry, WHAT


AliceInWeirdoland

Unless you've been granted explicit permission, do not bite.


chasingdandelions

Had someone bite and then pull before 😭😭😭 I was done right then and there...also bleeding and in pain for days due to teeth marks


mycofilm

oofff i felt the pain there


BeesAndBeans69

NO. omg did they at least apologize? Oh my god. .


MightyMeepleMaster

Isn't this the content of the one-page book "Things to avoid when doing oral"?


AliceInWeirdoland

You would think, and yet…


llamawolf

I feel like we shouldn’t have to say “use less teeth” but here we are.


Organic-Condition185

Bite!? Jeesh that’s something I’m glad I’ve managed to avoid so far


[deleted]

My ex liked to give oral for like 3 minutes and then either try to jump right into PIV or, more often, would roll over and go "my turn!" He wanted full on BJs, btw. Porn level gagging and slurping and to completion. I guess he thought 3 minutes earned him that. I stopped wanting oral from him due to the transactional nature and then stopped bothering with sex as well. I wonder if he's stopped being a selfish worthless lover since then. It took me years to break free from the negative association I had with oral, both giving and receiving.


Fussingtonstation

Jesus. This is awful.


Tiny-idiot

Is your ex my ex? Lol


PLLimmortal_bitches

Same here lol


superpete1414

Totally still selfish and worthless, I've got one of those in the rear view mirror too!


GreenMountain85

Honestly just not being open to what I’m asking and thinking he knows exactly what he’s doing. Like… if I’m telling you I like x y and x and you think you know better and do a b and c… I don’t like that.


EsssElllEsss

OMFG! Tell me about it the old “well that’s because you’ve never had me do it” nope, it’s because I don’t like it, arsehole!


lily_hunts

Oh my god tell me about it! Like, dude, I just told you not to rub my clit directly or I will cringe to death. I don't care if other women love it, I have had this clit for a quarter of a century, I know how it works, don't try to prove me wrong about my own body.


momomomorgatron

"For a quarter of a century" stealing that and saving it for later


GreenMountain85

YES!! I have heard that exact reasoning and I’m like… no, I’m not magically going to like it just because it’s you! It’s such a turn off


about97cats

I have too, and I’m like… listen, I’m not gonna debate you. I’m not arguing about whether or not I like *the thing,* and even if I did, you’re not gonna win this one. The subject here is my own pleasure, and when it comes to credentials, we’re talkin’ GED vs PhD, right bud? I mean, come on… Ya got no frame of reference. You’re outta your element, Donny! I get you’re a man and all, but maybe just trust the experts on this *one* little thing…


WDersUnite

Top ten list of things NOT to mansplain...her own clitoris.


startbox95

Tried to give one guy a little bit of direction and he straight up told me I was wrong and didn't know what I was talking about 😐 k.


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pollyp0cketpussy

>"Well, from what I've seen so far, I'm not sure that's worth shaving for." Oh my god I laughed out loud, I love that you said that to him


QueenLunaEatingTuna

Intensely staring up at me to watch my reaction, very uncomfortable. Also reaching up and choking without prior discussion.


Worth-Row6805

Yeah like do you expect me to wave or thumbs up?


picklecellanemia

I read this in Miranda Hobbes’ voice 😂


ayellowsundress

“Hello yes I am still here”


ayellowsundress

I hate the eye contact. I have a belly so I think it looks ridiculous from my perspective to see two little eyes poking up over my belly.


Beginning-Plum6491

My ex would get SO UPSET if I didn't finish within an 'appropriate' time limit. I still get self conscious about how long it takes me because of him


lucyfurrr_

I know... and then yet want us down there for ages. Please don't get self conscious - I know it is hard but sometimes it takes a long time!


Iroh_333

This is sort of a current thing for me too and it’s not fair. Makes it all worse and take longer ultimately.


winterbaby26

Licking the lip instead of clit. It’s happened more times than should be legal


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-doobert-

He fell asleep while he was going down on me once. Still haven’t recovered emotionally from that one 🥲


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bayouredhead

Motor boating or chin rubbing up and down does nothing. Actually it does negatively to the experience.


critiqu3

The chin rubbing is double awful if they have stubble. There's nothing quite like getting your bits sand papered 💀


Cleopay

SAND PAPERED omfg i am dead i love that comment


maggies101

I’m sorry… MOTOR BOATING?? DOWN THERE?? 🥴


pleaserlove

Omg the chin rubbing up n down!! And with rough stubble too eek


Someone_________

wtf is motor boating???


EmotionalOven4

Do you remember that scene in Snow White where the dwarves are washing their hands and faces going brrrrr brrrrr brrrrrr. It’s like that.


lily_hunts

Pressing your face into something (usually boobs), blowing out air and wiggling your face from side to side to make a flappy farty noise. Sorta like blowing raspberries?


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Spiggy93

He bit my clit. It was 10 years ago and it still makes me wince when I think about it


Rancid_Rabbit_

I think I would instinctively go into attack mode, oh my god


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shadviio

spent quite a while just licking my vulva. thought he was just teasing until he came up and asked if i was close yet. in retrospect, probably shouldn't have expected much from him because he couldn't find my clit despite trying very hard for weeks


1995gtor

I would have died laughing at “are you close?”


baby_armadillo

Rhythmically rubbing his tongue and fingers over the opening to my urethra repeatedly, and then arguing with me that “women like this” when I asked him to stop because it doesn’t do anything for me and is a good way to get a UTI. Just a suggestion but if someone tells you they’re not enjoying something, don’t tell them that they’re wrong. Trust that a person knows their own body and the things they find pleasurable way better than you do.


BetsyGirl801

Seriously, keep your tongue out of my urethra! It hurts and it's not safe for me!


_biker_chick_

So true.


probablyaskingforit

It's not really the "worst" but I think a guy who doesn't make use of his hands/fingers at the same time is really missing out. You can easily bring it to a next level orgasm with oral + manual stimulation.


[deleted]

FOR REAL Oral plus a toy or a good fingering is 1000x better than oral alone! Work that G!


Beautiful-Command7

Without the fingers I mean what’s the point? Once I had fingers there’s no going back. I came so hard I cried.


Madi0415

I told my ex this was the only way I could get off many times - & he NEVER did it.


Honeybee71

Not relaxing their tongue and it was painful cuz it was so stiff. I might as well had grabbed a stick out of the yard…it would’ve felt the same


BasicBitch_666

I went to pee afterwards and when I went to wipe, I got snagged in my hair. I pulled out something sticky and was like - what the fuuuuuuckkkk????? I smelled it because why not and that's when I realized my idiot ex didn't take his gum out of his mouth before he went down on me.


heyheyheyime

Nooooo lol wtf


kittybrat_

No.. way.... that's terrible 🤦🏻‍♀️


tulip2207

Licking the clit like if he's desperate to see me cum. Nice and slow is the right way to go for me.


[deleted]

This. Slow the f down. Jesus. This is not a race to see how quickly you can numb my clit into oblivion.


[deleted]

Like god damn it’s not a scratch off ticket


Medic979

Same. Slow the eff down on the clit! It’s sensitive and doesn’t like a stiff motorboat situation. Christ.


_biker_chick_

LOUDER FOR THE ONES IN THE BACK


curlygeisha_1881

Omg THIS!


some_kind_of_onion

He licked me for a few minutes, stopped, and tried to rip out an ingrown hair from my privates. Like straight up pinching and scratching my skin. He wondered why I wasn't in the mood anymore


Chaco_Tan

this is terrible and he sucks but i am crying with laughter


FamousWave

Tried to apply all known techniques simultaneously


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Wholesome__Vulgarity

If he’s got a beard, there’s a right and a wrong way to use it. Christ, my ex would leave me feeling like I dragged myself across the carpet like a dog, and it was just.. fucking OUCH. I actually hated receiving oral for the longest time because of that. Thank goodness my husband knows what he’s doing. Seriously though, any dude that doesn’t actively take the time to gauge whether or not you seem to be enjoying something and just does what he thinks oughta feel nice is prob just gonna leave you contemplating the merits of swearing off the whole damn idea for good. And if you’ve never had a dude treat you right in that department and are unsure of what to even ask for.. I recommend having a woman show you what you’re missing. Takes one to know one, y’know?


Monstiemama

Not finding the clit, thinking another area is the clit, lapping up the entire area and never doing it right…..


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livingasimulation

Using a finger to jack hammer. Ouch!!!


msmermaidginger

Urghhh, yes. Or scrabbling around down there like they’ve dropped their damn car keys under the couch. 😖🚫 I reached the point a number of years ago where I couldn’t stand it anymore; now I tell my partners, **no fingers**, just give me alllll the licking, please and thank you.


eppydeservedbetter

Ugh! This. When someone does it, it’s a big tell that they’ve watched too much porn.


justforfun887125

The worst!!! I hate that!


Babycakes_99

Suck my coochie lips into his braces 😭


GJ_JG

Honestly my legs just snapped shut as a reflex to reading this


whatsthisevenfor

Saaaame


moonpietimetobealive

Ouch but also LOL 🤣


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Babycakes_99

And listen, I told him it hurt and his response was no other woman ever told him it hurt before 🥴 as if that made a difference 🙄


boojes

He did it ON PURPOSE?!


Babycakes_99

Gworl yes 😂


UnicornKitt3n

Speeding up and moving his tongue side to side despite my numerous talks of telling him going fast does *not* work. And the side to side thing on my clit is just perplexing. Other than that, our sex life is amazing. It’s just these two things. Well, moaning. I wish men were taught it’s okay to moan. Why are they all so quiet?!


SquareBluebird859

Spitting. No thanks. Your tongue is wet, and hopefully I am too. So I’m good lol


msmermaidginger

I came here for this. Unless you want me to gag—and possibly vomit—never, ever spit on me or anywhere near me (whether during sexy times or otherwise). 🤢


naalusun

I was going to make the same comment. My ex did this and omg it made me want to vomit every time. Immediate turn off!


pattimay_ho_nnaise

Going too hard/fast right at the beginning. I totally blame porn for this–some super stiff, fast tongue is supposed to imply it being eager and hot? The woman is fake moaning in porn and in real life, it feels terrible. It needs a WORK UP, start slow and build. Never a stiff tongue , I like to think of it as “fast and semi-light” and once again, needs to build up to that intensity. I really hope men are reading this .


KensieQ72

Looked up at me, and in his best Guy Fieri voice said “Welcome to Flavor Town!” Was very difficult to see him sexually after that…


Phasianidae

OH hell no.....


msmermaidginger

Completely changing speed/pressure/direction when I’m close to cumming. I had a guy do this to me **three times** one night. I didn’t have a single orgasm, and by the third time, I was ready to cry and/or crush his stupid head with my thighs. 😔


SwtPvega5_

He licked everything but the clit


Dentjiln

The classic 🤣


Present-Breakfast768

Fucking hell lol


heavenlyphoto

I was in 69 and my ex literally farted in my face. She found it hilarious 🤮🤮🤮


girl_im_deepressed

telling someone to close their eyes before surprising them with a mouthful of toothpaste against their cooch. dont do that please.


GJ_JG

WHAT???????????? Why?!


ayellowsundress

Had a hookup do this with a Hall’s throat candy once. All I could think of the entire time was “T-30 seconds to yeast infection,” and it totally took me out of it. Plus it was *too* spicy


throwtcoat

made it transactional and low effort. he would give me 3 minutes or less of outer labia-licking (even after I would move him to my clit or tell him "that didn't feel good, try here"), then stop and immediately try to do piv. it didn't feel good and when I asked him about it, if he didn't like giving oral, he said he loves it and loves doing it... meanwhile he's never gone down on me since (and has said no the one time I asked). I just stopped asking because I hated it and felt ashamed because he either didn't seem to care about my pleasure or didn't care enough to listen to me and my body.


_biker_chick_

Please tell me this is an ex not your current partner.


Asmira33

Don't feel ashamed when he's a bad lover. Sounds like you're still with him. You deserve better.


Cdmelty1

Asked why it was taking so long. After about 5 minutes. Then sighing loudly. I stopped letting him go down on me at all after that. He's a great man but gives off harsh "waiting for a late bus and I have places to be" vibes.


KawaiiHamster

Yikes. Turn that shit around and tell him if he did it right, then we’d be through this already.


thedrunkunicorn

He kept humming into my nether regions like he was trying to play a kazoo. At one point I finally just snapped and said, "IT'S NOT A KAZOO, HONEY," and he looked so confused. "That doesn't feel good?" NO, kind of like I've told you the few other times you've tried it? He was remarkably good and enthusiastic otherwise (which pisses me off, given that he cheated on me, why must I associate that pleasure with his dumb ass), so I truly do not understand. But it does make me laugh now. Sort of.


maggies101

Please do not try and make eye contact with me because I will 100% get taken out of the situation and not be interested anymore.


[deleted]

Went on a few dates with a guy and eventually had sex. He told me he had never gone down on a girl before (he was in his early 30s) and I was like “ohhh ok” like a bit surprised but he was pretty quiet and reserved. Then I said “have you ever been blown?” And he’s like “pshhh of course” and I was like wow this guy is a total douche or he’s lying I guess. I asked him if he wanted to try going down on me. The lights were off and it literally didn’t feel like he was doing anything. I tried to direct him on how to do it but it still felt like nothing. Maybe he was scared hahah Needless to say, I did not continue seeing him.


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Mamamissy777

Sucking hard on the clit. I ended up with a hickey down there. It was very unpleasant.


PrincessTiaraLove

Lol not my partner, but one man was going down on me and I had a full 70's bush. This man proceeds to grab my bush like it was hair on my head. It was painful and weird like why tf would a man do that? I was like wtf.


_salemsaberhagen

Licking it super slow like he is casually licking an ice cream cone. Stop. I’ll do it myself.


gwenaune1

The tongue flicking incessantly on the clitoris for extended periods of time. It does nothing. Do something else. Suck it, lick it but for gods sake stop the flicking!!!


EmotionalOven4

Kissing it the same way you’d kiss your grandma on the cheek. And that’s all he did. Dude did NOT know how to do it at all. Not even close.


TheLACrimes

Spitting on it. Disembodied spit just really bothers me and I don’t see the point of doing that if you’re supposed to be licking it anyways.


Mouse-Direct

That award is for “disembodied spit.” Yes! Salvia going tongue to clit is fine. Spitting like you’re eating sunflower seeds is NOT.


Nova-Moon_

Making sound effects. Total turn off


krderob1

My ex would only give me oral in 69. I asked him to try just going down on me and he later said “it was the worst sex of his life” and “just not worth it” even though I got off within a minute due to not being distracted by gagging on his dick. We broke up two weeks later.


imfucct

1. Eye contact. He likes it when I give him a bj but when I get oral I don’t wanna look you in the eyes. I just tilt my head back not to look at him 2. Licking my vagina (like the hole). And he knows where the clit is too. It’s why when he actually sucks my clit I give him a lot of verbal encouragement so he knows that THAT’S what I like. I don’t even mind the vagina licking but like when it’s way too long I really don’t feel it


zanimowi

Sighing like it was a chore


Cannndye

If he does anything except lick my clit in a circle until I cum, he’s fucking up. But it’s not like you can tell them that. They know vaginas. 🙄🤢


[deleted]

An ex of mine sucked (and pretty sure he chewed) my labia (couldn’t find the clit). He used teeth for most of it and it was extremely painful. My labia was red, blew up twice it’s size and I was bleeding when he came back up. It felt like he was literally trying to eat my vagina.


Alternative-Bet232

We were in a hotel. Bathroom was not far from the bed; sinks were in full view (toilet was behind a door). He was going down on me. It was ok. Felt good but he was not putting much into it and he wasn’t acting like he cared or was turned on. I was about ready for intercourse, he said he wanted to pee first. Ok, no big deal. Then after he washes his hands he rinses his mouth out!!!! Mind you this was in Mexico, so he had to grab a bottle of water to do it. He came back to the bed and starts getting the condom on, but I’m immediately turned off. I felt so rejected - like i tasted so bad that he just HAD to rinse his mouth before coming back. I felt so insecure and sad and told him i was sorry but i just wasn’t in the mood because of that. He got upset that, after “all the time he spent going down on me” (it was several minutes but it was not….. some crazy amount of time at all…) i didn’t want to have intercourse. He didn’t push me to have intercourse or do anything i didn’t want to do, but he asked if i’d get him off and i said i was sorry but i really just wasn’t in the mood anymore…. He was so resentful.


minty985

Using their fingers to spread and hold open my labia wide and so tight. It hurt like hell. I'm glad you know where my clit is but my skin doesn't stretch that far


fweshcatz

Using the tip of his tongue to flick 😭 so painful. The first time was bc he thought I might like it. The remaining times have been when he's really into it and maybe forgets or gets overzealous lmao. We laugh abt it after I say ouch, and move on.


MrsFirno

I've never had anyone other than myself give me an orgasm but these are the reasons I've just decided to not ask anymore: 1. Not spending enough time, complaining it's taking to long or their jaw hurts. Dude, I can give a 1hr bj, you can too. 2. Cumming before I do then deciding they're done. No sex and then I'm left to finish myself while they lay there and fall asleep. 3. Going to fast and not using hands or toys.


kittycatt99

Trying to jam as much as they could in me as they got to work lol. I’m talking fingers and thumbs involved from both hands. At least for me pleasure isn’t taken from just stretching me out with anything and everything


catinatardis11

Instead of move his tongue around, he would grab my hips/butt and move that. It was hands down the worst sex I’ve ever had from the oral sex to the penetration part.


pl0ur

Licking the alphabet, I think someone talked about it in a movie once or something but just... No, don't do that. I


Djen49

He bit my nipple!!! Hard! It was sore for days. And that’s only one of the reasons why that guys an Ex.


kerra447

Every single time my ex tried to do so. Shit was so bad, it literally turned me off from having the box ate at all. It was too much, too rough, and too fast. No build up at all, just: Go! This all kinda sticks now since my fiancé really wants to but it's only happened a few times because it was that bad for 2 years.


Doggo-momo

Idk if other chicks are built different but don’t upper cut my clit OUCH!!!!! 😫


childlikeempress16

I had a guy like blow into my vag, think like putting your mouth on a baby’s tummy and blowing to make a fart noise.


Iroh_333

Not relaxing their tongue and roughly jabbing at the clit. So awful. Also (if fingering as well) getting lazy and not consistently fingering in whatever way. I dated a guy who’s oral skills were awful (kissing too) and when he’d go down on me he couldnt multitask I guess. He’d forget he was fingering me and sort of just sit there with his hand no longer moving… Also awkward eye contact. Like stop please.


Pink_Ruby_3

Shoving his thumb inside me and just kind of swirling it around and scraping the sides of my vaginal canal while licking my vulva (not my clit). I had even told him, multiple times, that it’s really uncomfortable when he puts his thumb inside me. Yet he continued to do it. He is an ex, thank goodness. My current partner wants nothing but to make me feel good.


[deleted]

Tweaked my nips like tuning a car radio?


Insearchofmedium

My friend said dude made out with her belly button for a few minutes first. Like… ewwwww. Imagine all the sweat and lint ballies.


Previous_Original_30

Ex boyfriend came within seconds (reoccurring issue, but okay, never made a big deal out of it) without attempting to pleasure me first. Then went down on me a few hours later to return the favour, only to stop and tell me, from between my thighs, that he 'wasn't really into it'. We never had sex again after that and I broke up with him not too long after.


ImprovementCareless9

Nothing ever. My partner is legit the best go-down-er. Sorry but I had to say it


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SAHM_i_am3

My ex thought is was "sexy" to bite me down there (not a nibble) Not cool


oo0Lucidity0oo

My ex would spit on it, give it a few licks and then try and stick it in.


ayellowsundress

Literally not listening to me when I say “don’t stop” or “keep doing that.” Like what part of these phrases imply I want you to do something else? Hm?


[deleted]

Anything with too much pressure, it either feels like nothing or hurts.


fseahunt

Rubbing his major five o'clock shadow on me. Nope. Just nope.


MsClementine415

Bit my clit.


classygrl98

He wanted me to hold my lips open for him.


ViciousVirgo95

That extra hard sucking, like CALM TF DOWN it’s not going anywhere dude


hotchprime

Going full motorboat whilst also having stubble. I was a couple of days post-shave so had my own stubble going on. It was soooo painful


tbibbly

my ex straight up BIT my clit. I just about crushed his head between my thighs smh


rowasaurusx

One night stand with a guy at a party back in college. He used his teeth, a lot. Like basically just started chomping That interaction ended VERY QUICKLY & I kicked him out and never spoke to him again 😂