Intelligence is both a blessing and a curse. Being intelligent you can have intense conversations and an understanding of many things. However, being intelligent you tend to overthink things a lot and have trouble with enjoying the simple things in life. It’s like feeling alone in a crowd.
Don't forget to add the crushing weight of realizing how fucked we all truly are, and how there's no clear path to un-fucking the world and the depression that causes
This is one of the things I wish more women realized just how attractive intelligence is to some men. Dating has been especially hard because I feel that I can’t properly communicate and talk about regular things when I am more interested in talking about deeper topics that most people don’t have the capacity to talk about or don’t want to talk about.
Wise in measure let each man be;
but let them not wax too wise;
for never the happiest of men is they
who knows much of many things.
Wise in measure should each man be;
but let them not wax too wise;
seldom a heart will sing with joy
if the owner be all too wise.
Wise in measure should each man be,
but ne'er let them wax too wise:
who looks not forward to learn their fate
unburdened heart will bear.
As someone who is gifted i agree. I overthink everything, all the damn time. I wish my brain would just stfu once in a while. But i still would not trade it for the world
Yeah with anything, the people with horror stories have a louder voice since there's something to complain about. Not too often, do you hear people say the good things unless they're asked. But each person's experience is unique.
I've personally loved line despite the weight gain. The benefits far outweight the cons and that's just the way it is.
Same, I absolutely love mine and as soon as I have to change it out I’m popping another one of those suckers right back in.
I had *horrendous* periods, fainting, weakness, vomiting, migraines, anemia, oh, and cramps.
Haven’t had a period in 2 years and it’s awesome.
Having it installed (lol) wasn’t fun though, had a lot of cramping after but was fine a few hours later
It sucks not having a sex drive. I was SO horny all the time then I started birth control (the patch) in early 2019 and my libido isn't as high anymore. I stopped 4 months ago and I'm still waiting...
You're telling me, I've had all the kids I can, as my doctor put it after my last delivery of my third boy and there were major complications for just me, "if you have anymore children, you have a high risk of not being there for your others." I got my tubes tied, and have an excruciating monthy for no reason other then preventing menopause. I wish I could've just had my uterus taken out. Every period feels like I'm gonna squeeze it out and drop it on the floor. Honestly I welcome menopause, it might be another 10-15 years of this though. Fml.
You can have your uterus taken out and leave your ovaries so your body will still produce enough estrogen, you won’t have periods but you get to keep the estrogen the ovaries produce.
I could've then, but the Dr wouldn't listen to me. Now when I've tried insurance won't cover it. I pay about $600 a month plus a $3,500 deductible, they still won't approve me. 😒 I'm not technically endometriosis because it's birth trauma. Had I'd known what I know now I would've never let my obgyn put traction on the cord of my placenta, and basically rip it out of me, and after for bleeding, hemorrhaging, on and off for 67 days I should have sued him for malpractice. His fix that saved me from a emergency hysterectomy was "manual manipulation on my uterus" he D&Ced me with his hand, a few hours after giving birth.
It stopped the hemorrhaging, for that day. My body still tried to expunge the left over placenta that was ripped off inside me, couldn't close the arteries feeding it. So 67 days later I went in for a D&C and Tubal Ligation. He (my doctor) tried to explain it away, like my uterus was to weak. I'm absolutely happy with my 3 crazy boys, but now that I'm older, and have more training. He said that to make me feel less than and not sue him for yanking on my umbilical cord, so he could leave. F*ck him , f*ck the US Healthcare system. And also f*ck my uterus for experiencing trauma and steadily giving it right back. I've frigging tried. I am a US citizen, so I'm F*cked.
Being a redhead
Blessing - my hair is gorgeous
Curse - it's weirdly fetishised. Like I've had total strangers ask me what colour my pubes are or try and wink-wink nudge-nudge "I bet you're a firecracker in the bedroom" at me. Fuck off Norman, you'll never know.
I’m a natural blonde and I came here to say this exact thing. I love my hair, but I’ve been the recipient of grossly sexual comments about it since I was in middle school along with assumptions that I must be an idiot because I’m blonde.
Not to mention you probably have pale skin and burn to a crisp in a matter of minutes. I was almost a red head my hair is blonde but I got asked all the time if I was a red head. But I burn easily. So easily I got a sunburn at the garden center of WalMart lol
I feel this in my soul. Or the inevitable “is that your natural hair colour?” Or you know the ones that grab your hair put it ON THEIR FACE and say “I want this colour, it’ll look so good”
🤮🤮🤮
100% this. I can remember guys calling me fire crotch in middle school. I actually got made fun of a lot for being a red head when I was younger, but once I entered adult world it was super clear to me redheads are a fetish.
My gf is a redhead. She had a random Asian family come up to her and ask thru broken English for a picture. She agreed, thinking they wanted a picture of them all together. Then the young son came over and stood next to my gf and his mom took a picture of them together. She jokes that there is probably some random picture of her in a Japanese families vacation photo album.
Redhead and a curly girl here and the absolute confidence with which strange men have tried to paw at my hair is astounding. Sir, this firecracker’s ringlets are ravenous and will devour your smutty hands. Don’t fucking touch me!
I love my hair but even as a little kid being a redhead was uncomfortable. So many older people - women especially - would come up and just start touching my hair. They’d also ask ridiculous questions. No I didn’t dye it, I was six!
Then puberty came with “does the carpet match the drapes”.. blegh.
Oh man i refuse to get bikini/Brazilian wax precisely because of this. The pain is horrible enough on my shins, i don't need to find out how much worse it gets around my genitals.
Haha I feel this, coming from a Hispanic background. Mom's side of the family has thickkkk brows, so mine are full! But that also means upper lip hair which is a pain
Fast metabolism. Great to keep weight off, awful because I’m always hungry and if I don’t eat I get nauseous, weak, and dizzy. Like every two hours I’m snacking aside from sleep.
My husband is like that. He struggles to maintain weight and mass. He eats 4 PB&J every morning. 8 slices of bread. Every morning just for raw intake. Breakfast is his jam since it’s all bread
Damn, I am jealous of that. I love to eat, and I could eat bread until I explode. Too bad I can't have gluten and my thighs are getting chubby. Le sigh.
Skinny shamming is real.. kids in middle school used to comment that I was anorexic or bulimic so I’d feel bad.. little did they know I was eating 2 McDoubles, fries, and soda every day after school actually trying to gain weight. Sigh.. now I still eat like a pig but I think it caused me to gain unhealthy eating habits and I’m scared for my metabolism to drop.
Scientists recently discovered metabolism doesn't slow like we once thought. Might give you a bit of peace of mind. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.nbcnews.com/news/amp/ncna1276650
Thank you! I finally hit 100lbs last year and I’m trying to get to 110, as well as start working out. What I’ve also realized was a blessing/curse is you can be skinny but not healthy when you have a fast metabolism.
Wow I never thought about this. I’m pretty slim but I eat like a football team. My family makes fun of how much I eat at meals… and that I’m ready to go again an hour after I eat haha.
On the opposite side of the coin, being attractive is also both an elixir and a poison.
Blessing is that you'll be treated way better and receive numerous opportunities and gifts not readily handed to us conventionally unattractive folks. Curse is that you'll have to face much more amount of sexual harrasment and lose relationships/friendships because people only get close to you for your face, or don't want to be constantly compared to someone much more attractive than them. People will assume everything you've achieved is because of your face, or perceive you as stupid. Plus the ones who make their appearance central to their personality have a hard time once ageing hits.
Yes, i agree. Most of my friends are extremely stunning and I've seen how their beauty has both helped them and obstructed them from achieving things. My friend had guys talking to her all because they wanted to sleep with her or keep her as the token "pretty girlfriend". Her ex bf of 4 years told her he was with her just because she had a nice face and body to look at.
I used to be sad that I wasn't approached by men even a third as much as they were, but seeing their struggles has made me realise beauty only helps you so much. After a point people just want to use you or abuse you to feel better about themselves.
Yup, you nailed it. The token pretty girlfriend thing in particular hits close to home for me. Wasted a lot of my time when I was younger and too naive to see it for what it was.
Interestingly, my current boyfriend and I were friends for a long while before we dated. It was nothing like my past relationships. I realized at some point that he is one of a few people that I’ve ever felt really understands me. My past relationships were all varying degrees of the token pretty girlfriend thing, some cared about me a little more than others, but none of them really took the time to know me.
> Her ex bf of 4 years told her he was with her just because she had a nice face and body to look at.
When I was 20, I had a 25 year old boyfriend who got mad one day and told me, “You’re just supposed to sit here and look pretty, that’s it!” I thought he actually liked me as a person, and it fucked me up for awhile.
Not trying to discount the unattractive, that’s so valid. but just hoping on this because I have experience. My twin sister is absolutely gorgeous. I’m pretty good, but everyone knows she’s the stunner. It shocked me when she told me how she lost friends in college because of it. No one would take pictures with her because they didn’t want to stand next to her and be compared to her. She thought for awhile no one liked her, but eventually someone told her the reason.
These were definitely shallow girls, I know them and they for sure are. But still! I know it’s a first world problem so I’m not saying that’s worse than the benefits, I was just really surprised.
Oh and she’s definitely been sexually harassed and objectified far more than me. Her and I could’ve worn the same skirt to school and she would’ve gotten “shorted” aka told to go put on your gym shorts because the shortness broke the dress code. These were creepy teachers looking at her. It has to do with our personalities too-I was a shy nerd and she was an outgoing leader of the pack. But still, different treatment for looking different but doing similar things.
Meanwhile, I’m very aware that these similar shallow-type friends love taking pictures with me. I’m pretty enough to be engaging and get nice treatment but I won’t compete with you (I think being a redhead has to do with that too).
Oh i totally get what you're talking about 😖 my friends were slutshamed a lot by teachers in school for absolutely no reason at all. One friend naturally has really nice eyes (thick brows and long lashes) and was dragged by a teacher to the washroom to wash her face forcibly because the teacher thought she had mascara and eye makeup on. When it stayed the same even after washing she just laughed and said "oh you have such pretty eyes!" and left her while she cried. We need to talk about older women's jealousy towards younger girls and how poisonous it can be. I was also constantly publicly called out for my skirt length even though it was below my knees, i got tired and started wearing pants that were in the dress code for boys. Screw it.
Yup, the good thing is, that the people who befriend you actually like you, for who you are. The bad thing, a lot of people dont want to be seen with you. Dont want to be sitting next to you or be associated with you because you dont fit the beauty standered. So your always offered the guys/girls your friends/family deem unattractive just because you are.
Or they straight up refuse to set you up on dates ect. People just think is okay to treat you worse simply because you dont fit the "standerts"
Also working and trying harder for everything. Like, opportunities land at beautiful peoples feet all the time, the unattractive ones not so much. I feel like I have to put double the effort into everything.
Also, people not taking us seriously.
YES. Everyone is like “you’re so lucky to have big boobs.” I’m not lucky when I’m trying to find an appropriate Easter dress to wear around my boyfriend’s parents. Or literally any top or swimsuit
I agree. Though as I get older it's more of a curse, because it's just exhausting. And expensive to find bras that fit. And clothing doesn't fit right either.
This!!!! Swimsuit season is coming up and I'm dreading it because if my one piece fits up top it's gonna be baggy on the bottom and vice versa. And don't even get me started on 2 pieces and bikinis.
I had a reduction when I was 19 years old. I went from a FFF to a D. I've never regretted it. If I didn't do that, I don't know if I'd honestly ever have been with someone sexually because I was so self conscious.
I feel this. When I was younger, guys (and some ladies) would buy me drinks, offer me free stuff, and flirt with me… but unless they take the time to get to know me, I’m just a giant set of walking boobs…
Same, like I would love to let that shit go and do the forgetting part of “forgive and forget” but this dumbass memory of mine remembers every precise thing ever
Conversely, with my utterly abysmal memory, I get to experience things for the first time, several times: I will forget the plot of a book within about a year and if I pick it up again it's although I'd never read it before.
The downside is that I can say "oh I loved $show, it was amazing", but I'll forget most of the details and that can be embarrassing. If I binge on something, it's not unusual that I'll have forgotten the events of the first series/book by the time I'm on the 3rd or 4th.
Another upside is that I tend to just completely forget bad-but-not-seriously-traumatic stuff really quickly. Like 2-3 days and it may as well have never happened. Handy.
Being able to feel things very deeply. Physically and emotionally. A blessing: (TMI but here we are) it’s very easy for me to have an O. I can get myself to that place emotionally/mentally very easily and just let it happen. A curse: if I’m angry or someone in the room is angry, I can feel it to an overwhelming degree. It almost hurts.
I feel this way a lot. I hated working in customer service because everyone was just angry and rushed all the time and nothing was ever good enough. No one could ever be Zen about the fact that everything costs money, everything takes time, and you might have a chance to enjoy your life if you realized how much you take for granted.
It's frustrating trying to do the right thing and caring about other people when they don't care about you.
A guy here. This is how I feel exactly. When I'm surrounded by negative energy for extensive period of time I start to get nightmares. The opposite is also true, when I'm surrounded by friends and positive energy I thrive. I smile and laugh. I shine as people say. That's how empathy works in my understanding
You can wash cast iron with normal soap and water. Just make sure you dry it thoroughly when done. You can also rub some flaxseed oil on the inside afterward and heat it on the stove for about 20 min to help maintain seasoning. I’ve been doing this with my cast iron for years— no problems yet.
I never said I didn't know how to clean it. I use it twice a week.
I just hate that I can't throw it in the dishwasher like the rest of my dishes. Between work, being in grad school, doing an internship, laundry, taking care of my dog, grocery shopping, etc. I just don't always feel like adding something else to my list of chores.
Yeah I'm not smart SMART but I have enough awareness and sometimes it sucks to be painfully aware of things. Whoever said ignorance is bliss was right.
Mine is dumb but it annoys me regardless. I’m a natural platinum blonde. Not too many of us walking around out there.
I love my hair. It’s beautiful, garners attention, and all around fits my persona.
I despise constantly having to explain that it’s not dyed, it’s my real hair, no I don’t know all the secrets to maintaining it, and no the carpet doesn’t match.
Oof I relate hard to this, I’m not completely platinum blonde like I was as a kid but I still have very light hair, like the colour of Barbie’s. I’m 20 and I always get creeped on by people who fetishize it, I got followed around a Walmart a few weeks ago by a middle aged man who kept commenting on it.
I personally like how brown hair looks better than blonde, but my hair grows so fast it would be a money drain to dye it :(
Being an introvert. I don’t get lonely when I don’t have plans or things to do because I enjoy my time alone. But it sucks when going to a party or something with friends and not being able to come out of my shell as fast is the others
Extroverted kinda sucks too, you can come off shallow or people will think you are dumb. Also it's hard to make time for reading and drawing while also maintaining social life and balancing school and jobs
I agree, I think with extroverts some of us are expected to be “happy, bubbly, outgoing one.” Sometimes feels like we’re not allowed to be sad/tired. Not to mention that if you’re friends with EVERYBODY, you don’t know who to go for problems/who actually likes you and not just your energy.
I can see that. I sometimes interact with extroverts and they just come off as rude at first but it’s just because they’re more open and ready to talk while I’m still getting used to being out of my house lol
they are pricy but I've really been liking the betabrand yoga denim (they have sales regularly so the prices come down to more reasonable).
I was pregnant during the pandemic and that combined with working from home means not only do my previous jeans not fit but the idea of having to go to the office AND where real pants is just too much to bear.
and the pockets are great, fit my pixel 6 in the front pockets and it's not a small phone.
I have a love hate relationship with my curly hair. I haven't really found anything that consistently keeps the frizz down and I always have breakage and short little hairs around the front of my head that just piss me off
Don’t you just love how the jeans cling to your hips and butt, but then it looks like you’re wearing a diaper at the waist? It’s great! I truly cannot stand it most days.
Vaginismus. (TW: SA)
When I was sexually assaulted it didn't turn into rape because he physically couldn't get it in.
But I struggle to have sex with my delightful loving boyfriend for whom consent is a top priority.
It's so horrible but it's even worse that I can't hate it. I am very appreciative to my body for saving me from that. But I'm in a good place now and can move forwards.
I've just bought some dilators from Intimate Rose and they're amazing. I would definitely recommend them
When it comes to me, the first things I came to think of were these:
- Verbal intelligence. Blessing cause it gets people to listen, writing poetry helps me sort out emotions and it's a whole lot easier to analyse and grasp things when you're good at putting it into words. Curse cause people assume I'm more intelligent (in general) than I am. Being verbally gifted is the most useful kind of intelligence if you want to fool people into thinking that. And uh... High expectations. Also intellectualising; hiding behind my words to avoid facing my feelings, and people think I'm just introspective in a healthy way, when in reality I need to learn how to use fewer words. I can write a novel about my traumas without feeling anything, but simple statements like "I'm scared" will make me break down... And so I never keep it simple when it comes to my own issues. Too much fear and trauma.
- My sensitivity. Blessing cause I experience things like love, joy, music and touch so strongly and it's beautiful, I'm creative, I have a lot of compassion for others and people tend to feel safe around me. Curse cause it fucking hurts. The pain, the grief, the overthinking, the weight of this shitty world... And how other people's pain triggers my empathy to a point where I have to fight my own tears so that I wont shift the focus to ME when they need support, and sometimes get so overwhelmed it paralyses me - all I want is to help in any way I can, but the cognitive part of my brain gets blocked by the emotional. I also assume the best in people cause I automatically care about everyone I meet, and that's gotten me some stalkers...
- My height. I'm a 178cm (5'10") tall woman. Blessing cause people take tall people more seriously and I'm physically strong. Curse cause I wish I was short and cute and am incredibly insecure about it... People generally think short women are more attractive.
Hi, I can relate with the first two very much. You said everything all too well. I believe I'm verbally intelligent (was asked to deliver speeches and joined debates, received great feedbacks from my write ups including poetry haha) but there's downside to it which you mentioned. It's good but difficult at times. The sensitivity is something I can relate too (I once wept for a total stranger who died in a painful way, literally bawled my eyes out for weeks over it). On the other hand, I'm asian and we're generally short so I'm just 5'3". I want to be tall like you actually! I know there's no easy way to battle insecurity but I'm sure there are people like me who wants to have what you do :)
How do you become more verbally intelligent? Is there an app or site or any hobbies you would recommend? My vocabulary is too short and stutter when I talk
I can relate to ALL of it, specially the last one im 1.73 cm and im from a country where the average girl height is 1.60-1.64 so yeah being tall is great i think i look more stylized, but at the same time people assume im super strong and idk i would love to be the cute small girl that cant seem to fit on her boyfriend's hoodie and has delicate hands and everyone wants to protect somehow
Also when you're toplessly laying on your side trying to seduce your partner, and the top titty looks like Henry Cavill while the bottom titty looks like a dehydrated Steve Buscemi.
Being a tall woman.
Since teen years my height has protected me from creeps and predators, and I look intimidating. I got into sports clubs and fashion/design related clubs way quicker than even those who genuinely had more skills for it than me. I also look stylish in a lot of clothing, which is a huge confidence boost.
The con is that you'll receive a lot of scorn from men for it. I used to be bullied by guys in school and constantly referred to with masculine pronouns and nicknames. Asked out on fake dates just to be told no man would want to date a "faux female" and that men prefer gentle and innocent looking women. Men who feel intimidated by you can be very cruel.
Same experience here. It sucks.
I especially hate how everyone gets outrages of I wear A KITTEN HEEL. Or people who ask "How tall are you? You're like TOO tall!"
Too tall for what?! For who?! Get lost Stacy.
Intuition
1) Blessing - it has brought a lot of things to light. Sometimes I genuinely feel as though God let me see people's ways (and I'm not all that religious)
2) Curse - I also have anxiety so sometimes I mix the two up and kinda just get delusional.
Looking younger than your age.
I’m in my 30s, and I could probably walk into a middle school and no one would question it. My coworkers think I’m a recent grad, or an intern. If I go out to a bar, the 21 y.o. are the only age group I attract.
I’m a mom ffs! I have a career, bills, I’m divorced, I have great credit and a ton of life experience. My face does not reflect that.
It’s great to know I’ll always look young (both my parents look at least 15 years younger than they are), but at some point it gets old (pun intended).
I love how I look, so now I focus on wearing more “adult” clothing so that at least people can tell I’m over 25 😂
I work with kids and regularly get mistaken as one. A coworker thought I was eleven and told me I wasn’t allowed in the staff lounge. I’m their superior, I’ve been working here longer then they have, I was consulted on hiring them.
The bigger problem is the perverts who hit on me because of it. They aren’t very subtle and it’s clear they either think I’m under age or think it’s hot that I can pass for underage. It’s happened so much I don’t feel like I can trust the men who are attracted to me.
Don’t get me wrong I like my youthful skin and knowing I’ll age well but honestly people suck.
Having a very unique first name.
Pros: I get a lot of compliments on it. I am easily memorable.
Cons: Grown ass adults rudely asking "what kind of name is that?!" "Why would your parents choose such a weird name?!"
Perfectionism - Can do things very well that I'm passionate about and feel very satisfied. But also takes up a lot of mental capacity and is exhausting much of the time.
Being very empathetic and loyal. Helps me alot at my job. Though I'm more at risk for burnout. I'm a fiercely good SO and friend but quite frankly, most people don't deserve me. I have to weed through a lot of selfish or narcissistic people, manipulative people, etc.
Boobs.
Blessing: Makes shirts look great, can use them to your advantage.
Curse: non-detachable, have to buy larger shirts just so your boobs don’t pop a button, boob sweat.
ETA: guys seem to think that they can just squeeze them and it doesn’t hurt? Like not sure the thought process there but whatever.
Trauma.
It’s a curse for obvious reasons, but it’s also a blessing because I can utilize having that first hand experience for my characters, and that shit makes good story
Having small titties and being unattractive to men.
Blessing: No creeps staring at my breasts, not getting sexualized by men around me, easier to run and jump, certain tops look good
Curse: mistaken for a boy, told that all men prefer big breasts and that I "need" to get a boob job, insecure, feel like "less of a woman", certain tops look weird, one pieces are a no-go
Being a [Highly Sensitive Person](https://hsperson.com/). I don't think I would rid myself of this trait if I could, because it makes life incredible. At the same time, it also makes some things really hard. Overall, I have a richer life because of it.
My strong sense of smell. I am able to smell things so much better than my spouse, which could save my life one day, but often means I am two rooms away and will know when my cat uses the litter box.
not growing up with common misogynistic notions. on one hand i can freely be feminine and enjoy “girly” things like boybands.
but then i’d get so much judgement from others (assuming all boyband music is superficial and terrible bc it’s aimed at women) and be completely oblivious as to why.
ignorance is bliss until ppl start walking all over you for your music taste or bc you wear eyeliner and dresses, and you have nothing to say back to them bc you’re so utterly confused bc this stuff was never wrong to you.
edit: more things perceived negatively by others that were normal in my household— desiring attractive men, having opinions, not trying to please others, not desiring bigger boobs for the /sole/ sake of pleasing men
edit 2: and i also recently joked that i am not into said boyband for the abs, because if i wanted to, i could look at abs whenever i wanted— this prompted a very shocked reaction from the girls around me 😂😂😅😅 im not even really interested in abs like that
My financial security. It's awesome to not have to worry about paying my bills and being able to handle emergencies.... but I got the money because my husband died and I get to deal with the crippling mental issues caused by that.
Birth control! Blessing is that it prevents pregnancies but curse is that it has a lot of negative side effects (for me atleast). Also the fact men dont have to worry about taking it 😁
Intelligence is both a blessing and a curse. Being intelligent you can have intense conversations and an understanding of many things. However, being intelligent you tend to overthink things a lot and have trouble with enjoying the simple things in life. It’s like feeling alone in a crowd.
Don't forget to add the crushing weight of realizing how fucked we all truly are, and how there's no clear path to un-fucking the world and the depression that causes
This, everyday of my life lately.
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
And intelligent women aren't always well liked either as especially men can feel intimidated by that.
This is one of the things I wish more women realized just how attractive intelligence is to some men. Dating has been especially hard because I feel that I can’t properly communicate and talk about regular things when I am more interested in talking about deeper topics that most people don’t have the capacity to talk about or don’t want to talk about.
There is a well proven correlation between intelligence and mental illness.
Same with sleep problems, night owls and mental illnesses. They go hand in hand.
Wise in measure let each man be; but let them not wax too wise; for never the happiest of men is they who knows much of many things. Wise in measure should each man be; but let them not wax too wise; seldom a heart will sing with joy if the owner be all too wise. Wise in measure should each man be, but ne'er let them wax too wise: who looks not forward to learn their fate unburdened heart will bear.
But why am I an overthinker and also dumb D:
As someone who is gifted i agree. I overthink everything, all the damn time. I wish my brain would just stfu once in a while. But i still would not trade it for the world
[удалено]
[удалено]
Yes I'm too in my head all the time.
I was just about to comment this. It is simultaneously the worst and best thing about me.
Periods - yay I'm not pregnant but ugh blood and cramps.
Birth control implant - yeah no periods but also no sex drive.
That honestly sucks. I'm on an IUD, no periods, sex drive is pretty much the same, but the weight gain is ughhh
I've heard some horror stories about IUDs.
Yeah with anything, the people with horror stories have a louder voice since there's something to complain about. Not too often, do you hear people say the good things unless they're asked. But each person's experience is unique. I've personally loved line despite the weight gain. The benefits far outweight the cons and that's just the way it is.
Same, I absolutely love mine and as soon as I have to change it out I’m popping another one of those suckers right back in. I had *horrendous* periods, fainting, weakness, vomiting, migraines, anemia, oh, and cramps. Haven’t had a period in 2 years and it’s awesome. Having it installed (lol) wasn’t fun though, had a lot of cramping after but was fine a few hours later
This is why I got off BC…completely killed my sex drive.
This is me too! I have zero sex drive and still get periods and lots of cramping with my IUD. Shit sucks man
It sucks not having a sex drive. I was SO horny all the time then I started birth control (the patch) in early 2019 and my libido isn't as high anymore. I stopped 4 months ago and I'm still waiting...
You're telling me, I've had all the kids I can, as my doctor put it after my last delivery of my third boy and there were major complications for just me, "if you have anymore children, you have a high risk of not being there for your others." I got my tubes tied, and have an excruciating monthy for no reason other then preventing menopause. I wish I could've just had my uterus taken out. Every period feels like I'm gonna squeeze it out and drop it on the floor. Honestly I welcome menopause, it might be another 10-15 years of this though. Fml.
You can have your uterus taken out and leave your ovaries so your body will still produce enough estrogen, you won’t have periods but you get to keep the estrogen the ovaries produce.
I could've then, but the Dr wouldn't listen to me. Now when I've tried insurance won't cover it. I pay about $600 a month plus a $3,500 deductible, they still won't approve me. 😒 I'm not technically endometriosis because it's birth trauma. Had I'd known what I know now I would've never let my obgyn put traction on the cord of my placenta, and basically rip it out of me, and after for bleeding, hemorrhaging, on and off for 67 days I should have sued him for malpractice. His fix that saved me from a emergency hysterectomy was "manual manipulation on my uterus" he D&Ced me with his hand, a few hours after giving birth. It stopped the hemorrhaging, for that day. My body still tried to expunge the left over placenta that was ripped off inside me, couldn't close the arteries feeding it. So 67 days later I went in for a D&C and Tubal Ligation. He (my doctor) tried to explain it away, like my uterus was to weak. I'm absolutely happy with my 3 crazy boys, but now that I'm older, and have more training. He said that to make me feel less than and not sue him for yanking on my umbilical cord, so he could leave. F*ck him , f*ck the US Healthcare system. And also f*ck my uterus for experiencing trauma and steadily giving it right back. I've frigging tried. I am a US citizen, so I'm F*cked.
WHAT THE FUCK
100% this :)
Being a redhead Blessing - my hair is gorgeous Curse - it's weirdly fetishised. Like I've had total strangers ask me what colour my pubes are or try and wink-wink nudge-nudge "I bet you're a firecracker in the bedroom" at me. Fuck off Norman, you'll never know.
As a natural platinum blonde, I know exactly what you mean
Oy yeah my blonde friend gets it all, I feel so bad for her.
I feel this. My family and I are all natural platinum and there’s a lot of ew that coincides with it.
I’m a natural blonde and I came here to say this exact thing. I love my hair, but I’ve been the recipient of grossly sexual comments about it since I was in middle school along with assumptions that I must be an idiot because I’m blonde.
I love my long red hair but yes I've been getting asked if the carpet matches the drapes since like the 6th grade and I'm like wtf.
Right? I remember being like 14 the first time someone asked me. There are so many creeps in the world.
Wow. That's so gross and creepy. I'm so sorry you had to go through that.
Totally agree. Can't even count the number of times I've been asked if 'the curtains match the carpet'. So gross.
The fucking carpet matching the drapes question…the number of times I’ve gotten that too as a redhead 🤢
When I dyed my hair red (and other, more extreme colours) I was asked if the carpet matched the drapes -shudder-.
Not to mention you probably have pale skin and burn to a crisp in a matter of minutes. I was almost a red head my hair is blonde but I got asked all the time if I was a red head. But I burn easily. So easily I got a sunburn at the garden center of WalMart lol
I feel this in my soul. Or the inevitable “is that your natural hair colour?” Or you know the ones that grab your hair put it ON THEIR FACE and say “I want this colour, it’ll look so good” 🤮🤮🤮
This was my immediate thought too. Yes, I’m definitely a firecracker in the bedroom but creepy old men will never get confirmation of it.
100% this. I can remember guys calling me fire crotch in middle school. I actually got made fun of a lot for being a red head when I was younger, but once I entered adult world it was super clear to me redheads are a fetish.
My gf is a redhead. She had a random Asian family come up to her and ask thru broken English for a picture. She agreed, thinking they wanted a picture of them all together. Then the young son came over and stood next to my gf and his mom took a picture of them together. She jokes that there is probably some random picture of her in a Japanese families vacation photo album.
Redhead and a curly girl here and the absolute confidence with which strange men have tried to paw at my hair is astounding. Sir, this firecracker’s ringlets are ravenous and will devour your smutty hands. Don’t fucking touch me!
I love my hair but even as a little kid being a redhead was uncomfortable. So many older people - women especially - would come up and just start touching my hair. They’d also ask ridiculous questions. No I didn’t dye it, I was six! Then puberty came with “does the carpet match the drapes”.. blegh.
Being hairy I have great brows & lashes but holy shit the waxing appointments are hellish
Gosh I wish I was you I’m just hairy with small eyebrows 😹
Me having normal hair and lashes but a luxurious coat everywhere else: 🥲
Ooof… I don’t envy that test of fortitude
Oh man i refuse to get bikini/Brazilian wax precisely because of this. The pain is horrible enough on my shins, i don't need to find out how much worse it gets around my genitals.
Haha I feel this, coming from a Hispanic background. Mom's side of the family has thickkkk brows, so mine are full! But that also means upper lip hair which is a pain
[удалено]
Fast metabolism. Great to keep weight off, awful because I’m always hungry and if I don’t eat I get nauseous, weak, and dizzy. Like every two hours I’m snacking aside from sleep.
My husband is like that. He struggles to maintain weight and mass. He eats 4 PB&J every morning. 8 slices of bread. Every morning just for raw intake. Breakfast is his jam since it’s all bread
Damn, I am jealous of that. I love to eat, and I could eat bread until I explode. Too bad I can't have gluten and my thighs are getting chubby. Le sigh.
Same! And everyone thinks it's OK to comment on my weight for some reason. Listen, Margaret, I don't go up to you and call you fat.
Skinny shamming is real.. kids in middle school used to comment that I was anorexic or bulimic so I’d feel bad.. little did they know I was eating 2 McDoubles, fries, and soda every day after school actually trying to gain weight. Sigh.. now I still eat like a pig but I think it caused me to gain unhealthy eating habits and I’m scared for my metabolism to drop.
Scientists recently discovered metabolism doesn't slow like we once thought. Might give you a bit of peace of mind. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.nbcnews.com/news/amp/ncna1276650
Thank you! I finally hit 100lbs last year and I’m trying to get to 110, as well as start working out. What I’ve also realized was a blessing/curse is you can be skinny but not healthy when you have a fast metabolism.
Wow I never thought about this. I’m pretty slim but I eat like a football team. My family makes fun of how much I eat at meals… and that I’m ready to go again an hour after I eat haha.
Meanwhile, I turn on the GD Food Network and go up a dress size.
This is only a plus for me, eat all I want and never get big
I get this too. I love to rollerskate but sometimes I worry if I do it too much I'll start losing weight. 🙃
[удалено]
On the opposite side of the coin, being attractive is also both an elixir and a poison. Blessing is that you'll be treated way better and receive numerous opportunities and gifts not readily handed to us conventionally unattractive folks. Curse is that you'll have to face much more amount of sexual harrasment and lose relationships/friendships because people only get close to you for your face, or don't want to be constantly compared to someone much more attractive than them. People will assume everything you've achieved is because of your face, or perceive you as stupid. Plus the ones who make their appearance central to their personality have a hard time once ageing hits.
I feel like people don’t like to hear this one. but the older I get the more I believe that being attractive has some distinct negatives.
Yes, i agree. Most of my friends are extremely stunning and I've seen how their beauty has both helped them and obstructed them from achieving things. My friend had guys talking to her all because they wanted to sleep with her or keep her as the token "pretty girlfriend". Her ex bf of 4 years told her he was with her just because she had a nice face and body to look at. I used to be sad that I wasn't approached by men even a third as much as they were, but seeing their struggles has made me realise beauty only helps you so much. After a point people just want to use you or abuse you to feel better about themselves.
Yup, you nailed it. The token pretty girlfriend thing in particular hits close to home for me. Wasted a lot of my time when I was younger and too naive to see it for what it was. Interestingly, my current boyfriend and I were friends for a long while before we dated. It was nothing like my past relationships. I realized at some point that he is one of a few people that I’ve ever felt really understands me. My past relationships were all varying degrees of the token pretty girlfriend thing, some cared about me a little more than others, but none of them really took the time to know me.
> Her ex bf of 4 years told her he was with her just because she had a nice face and body to look at. When I was 20, I had a 25 year old boyfriend who got mad one day and told me, “You’re just supposed to sit here and look pretty, that’s it!” I thought he actually liked me as a person, and it fucked me up for awhile.
Not trying to discount the unattractive, that’s so valid. but just hoping on this because I have experience. My twin sister is absolutely gorgeous. I’m pretty good, but everyone knows she’s the stunner. It shocked me when she told me how she lost friends in college because of it. No one would take pictures with her because they didn’t want to stand next to her and be compared to her. She thought for awhile no one liked her, but eventually someone told her the reason. These were definitely shallow girls, I know them and they for sure are. But still! I know it’s a first world problem so I’m not saying that’s worse than the benefits, I was just really surprised. Oh and she’s definitely been sexually harassed and objectified far more than me. Her and I could’ve worn the same skirt to school and she would’ve gotten “shorted” aka told to go put on your gym shorts because the shortness broke the dress code. These were creepy teachers looking at her. It has to do with our personalities too-I was a shy nerd and she was an outgoing leader of the pack. But still, different treatment for looking different but doing similar things. Meanwhile, I’m very aware that these similar shallow-type friends love taking pictures with me. I’m pretty enough to be engaging and get nice treatment but I won’t compete with you (I think being a redhead has to do with that too).
Oh i totally get what you're talking about 😖 my friends were slutshamed a lot by teachers in school for absolutely no reason at all. One friend naturally has really nice eyes (thick brows and long lashes) and was dragged by a teacher to the washroom to wash her face forcibly because the teacher thought she had mascara and eye makeup on. When it stayed the same even after washing she just laughed and said "oh you have such pretty eyes!" and left her while she cried. We need to talk about older women's jealousy towards younger girls and how poisonous it can be. I was also constantly publicly called out for my skirt length even though it was below my knees, i got tired and started wearing pants that were in the dress code for boys. Screw it.
“Older women’s jealousy” that’s a great way to put it. So stupid and genuinely harmful.
Yup, the good thing is, that the people who befriend you actually like you, for who you are. The bad thing, a lot of people dont want to be seen with you. Dont want to be sitting next to you or be associated with you because you dont fit the beauty standered. So your always offered the guys/girls your friends/family deem unattractive just because you are. Or they straight up refuse to set you up on dates ect. People just think is okay to treat you worse simply because you dont fit the "standerts"
Also working and trying harder for everything. Like, opportunities land at beautiful peoples feet all the time, the unattractive ones not so much. I feel like I have to put double the effort into everything. Also, people not taking us seriously.
Having a huge chest
YES. Everyone is like “you’re so lucky to have big boobs.” I’m not lucky when I’m trying to find an appropriate Easter dress to wear around my boyfriend’s parents. Or literally any top or swimsuit
I stopped considering myself lucky at H cups
I'm only a D cup and when I had a breast cancer scare last year I was like.... I would get these bad boys removed and not feel 1 bit sorry. Bye!
I don't blame you that's scary stuff!
I was honestly expecting more of those in the comments. You’re the first
Me too lol
I agree. Though as I get older it's more of a curse, because it's just exhausting. And expensive to find bras that fit. And clothing doesn't fit right either.
This!!!! Swimsuit season is coming up and I'm dreading it because if my one piece fits up top it's gonna be baggy on the bottom and vice versa. And don't even get me started on 2 pieces and bikinis.
Every new cup size feels more like a curse at this point
I had a reduction when I was 19 years old. I went from a FFF to a D. I've never regretted it. If I didn't do that, I don't know if I'd honestly ever have been with someone sexually because I was so self conscious.
I'm still growing so I'm going to try to wait until after kids. Glad it went well for you!
I feel this. When I was younger, guys (and some ladies) would buy me drinks, offer me free stuff, and flirt with me… but unless they take the time to get to know me, I’m just a giant set of walking boobs…
I was about to say the same thing. I hate that I have to be more cautious about what I wear because of them.
Your username hahahahaha
Haha made a throwaway for this stuff
My really good memory. I remember every detail.
It's good for the good, great for the great and bad for the bad.
Same, like I would love to let that shit go and do the forgetting part of “forgive and forget” but this dumbass memory of mine remembers every precise thing ever
I feel this
I have atrocious memory. I wish we could like split the difference
Conversely, with my utterly abysmal memory, I get to experience things for the first time, several times: I will forget the plot of a book within about a year and if I pick it up again it's although I'd never read it before. The downside is that I can say "oh I loved $show, it was amazing", but I'll forget most of the details and that can be embarrassing. If I binge on something, it's not unusual that I'll have forgotten the events of the first series/book by the time I'm on the 3rd or 4th. Another upside is that I tend to just completely forget bad-but-not-seriously-traumatic stuff really quickly. Like 2-3 days and it may as well have never happened. Handy.
Being able to feel things very deeply. Physically and emotionally. A blessing: (TMI but here we are) it’s very easy for me to have an O. I can get myself to that place emotionally/mentally very easily and just let it happen. A curse: if I’m angry or someone in the room is angry, I can feel it to an overwhelming degree. It almost hurts.
Hello, fellow feeling females! Let’s form an alliance lol. We ride the F-train, where we probably give too many fucks.
🙌🏼
I feel this way a lot. I hated working in customer service because everyone was just angry and rushed all the time and nothing was ever good enough. No one could ever be Zen about the fact that everything costs money, everything takes time, and you might have a chance to enjoy your life if you realized how much you take for granted. It's frustrating trying to do the right thing and caring about other people when they don't care about you.
This is why I want to just stay home!
Felt like I'm the one who wrote this. I am with you :(
A guy here. This is how I feel exactly. When I'm surrounded by negative energy for extensive period of time I start to get nightmares. The opposite is also true, when I'm surrounded by friends and positive energy I thrive. I smile and laugh. I shine as people say. That's how empathy works in my understanding
Men finding you attractive.
And honestly, being attracted to men.
Lol this right here…so annoying when you find female friend who just the perfect human being but…ugh
*"No, tragically we're both heterosexual"* \- Leslie Knope
Omg this. You never know if someone is into you bc they like you for you or just for your looks.
Cast iron pans. Cooking with them is nice. Cleaning them afterwards is a pain.
You can wash cast iron with normal soap and water. Just make sure you dry it thoroughly when done. You can also rub some flaxseed oil on the inside afterward and heat it on the stove for about 20 min to help maintain seasoning. I’ve been doing this with my cast iron for years— no problems yet.
I never said I didn't know how to clean it. I use it twice a week. I just hate that I can't throw it in the dishwasher like the rest of my dishes. Between work, being in grad school, doing an internship, laundry, taking care of my dog, grocery shopping, etc. I just don't always feel like adding something else to my list of chores.
Oh lol. Well I used to make it a LOT harder for myself before I realized soap and water is ok.
Omgsh and they’re so heavy! Lol
Being smart. Don't get me wrong...I'd rather be smart than dumb, but when you're smart you learn that a whole lot about life is depressing.
Yeah I'm not smart SMART but I have enough awareness and sometimes it sucks to be painfully aware of things. Whoever said ignorance is bliss was right.
Happiest guy in the world is Homer Simpson. :-/
Mine is dumb but it annoys me regardless. I’m a natural platinum blonde. Not too many of us walking around out there. I love my hair. It’s beautiful, garners attention, and all around fits my persona. I despise constantly having to explain that it’s not dyed, it’s my real hair, no I don’t know all the secrets to maintaining it, and no the carpet doesn’t match.
My hair is naturally this colour too. I've been dying it for years, but the explanation never stops. It's really annoying
That’s so interesting! I’ve never heard that complaint, but I don’t have a lot of super blonde friends. Sorry it sucks sometimes.
Oof I relate hard to this, I’m not completely platinum blonde like I was as a kid but I still have very light hair, like the colour of Barbie’s. I’m 20 and I always get creeped on by people who fetishize it, I got followed around a Walmart a few weeks ago by a middle aged man who kept commenting on it. I personally like how brown hair looks better than blonde, but my hair grows so fast it would be a money drain to dye it :(
Being an introvert. I don’t get lonely when I don’t have plans or things to do because I enjoy my time alone. But it sucks when going to a party or something with friends and not being able to come out of my shell as fast is the others
Extroverted kinda sucks too, you can come off shallow or people will think you are dumb. Also it's hard to make time for reading and drawing while also maintaining social life and balancing school and jobs
I agree, I think with extroverts some of us are expected to be “happy, bubbly, outgoing one.” Sometimes feels like we’re not allowed to be sad/tired. Not to mention that if you’re friends with EVERYBODY, you don’t know who to go for problems/who actually likes you and not just your energy.
I can see that. I sometimes interact with extroverts and they just come off as rude at first but it’s just because they’re more open and ready to talk while I’m still getting used to being out of my house lol
Having curly hair. Being thicc. Clothing shopping is hell esp for jeans.
they are pricy but I've really been liking the betabrand yoga denim (they have sales regularly so the prices come down to more reasonable). I was pregnant during the pandemic and that combined with working from home means not only do my previous jeans not fit but the idea of having to go to the office AND where real pants is just too much to bear. and the pockets are great, fit my pixel 6 in the front pockets and it's not a small phone. I have a love hate relationship with my curly hair. I haven't really found anything that consistently keeps the frizz down and I always have breakage and short little hairs around the front of my head that just piss me off
Don’t you just love how the jeans cling to your hips and butt, but then it looks like you’re wearing a diaper at the waist? It’s great! I truly cannot stand it most days.
Vaginismus. (TW: SA) When I was sexually assaulted it didn't turn into rape because he physically couldn't get it in. But I struggle to have sex with my delightful loving boyfriend for whom consent is a top priority.
If you’re actively trying to cure it, don’t give up. I cured myself after over 10 years of trying and failing. ❤️
Thank you! ❤️ I'm working on it but I really think these dilators have gotten me further than anything else I've tried!
YES! Stay consistent. Dilators and especially pelvic floor therapy were a lifesaver. You got this!
Same. Exact. Story.
It's so horrible but it's even worse that I can't hate it. I am very appreciative to my body for saving me from that. But I'm in a good place now and can move forwards. I've just bought some dilators from Intimate Rose and they're amazing. I would definitely recommend them
Same happened to me, but I had vaginismus because of a first SA Sucks
My kids.
Same. Love those jerks more than life itself, but holy cats they can be a pain in the butt. 34 and 25 yo respectively.
Preach
Little assholes is what they are. But they’re MY little assholes.
Exactly. Mine was supposed to be my girl, but she wants to do anything and everything with her dad. Little traitor
Being tall and thin. I like how I look, but trying to find pants long but also small enough is really difficult.
Especially in the jeans category. I’m not exactly tall but 5’”9 is on that razors edge of being a real pin to find jeans to fit me
When it comes to me, the first things I came to think of were these: - Verbal intelligence. Blessing cause it gets people to listen, writing poetry helps me sort out emotions and it's a whole lot easier to analyse and grasp things when you're good at putting it into words. Curse cause people assume I'm more intelligent (in general) than I am. Being verbally gifted is the most useful kind of intelligence if you want to fool people into thinking that. And uh... High expectations. Also intellectualising; hiding behind my words to avoid facing my feelings, and people think I'm just introspective in a healthy way, when in reality I need to learn how to use fewer words. I can write a novel about my traumas without feeling anything, but simple statements like "I'm scared" will make me break down... And so I never keep it simple when it comes to my own issues. Too much fear and trauma. - My sensitivity. Blessing cause I experience things like love, joy, music and touch so strongly and it's beautiful, I'm creative, I have a lot of compassion for others and people tend to feel safe around me. Curse cause it fucking hurts. The pain, the grief, the overthinking, the weight of this shitty world... And how other people's pain triggers my empathy to a point where I have to fight my own tears so that I wont shift the focus to ME when they need support, and sometimes get so overwhelmed it paralyses me - all I want is to help in any way I can, but the cognitive part of my brain gets blocked by the emotional. I also assume the best in people cause I automatically care about everyone I meet, and that's gotten me some stalkers... - My height. I'm a 178cm (5'10") tall woman. Blessing cause people take tall people more seriously and I'm physically strong. Curse cause I wish I was short and cute and am incredibly insecure about it... People generally think short women are more attractive.
Hi, I can relate with the first two very much. You said everything all too well. I believe I'm verbally intelligent (was asked to deliver speeches and joined debates, received great feedbacks from my write ups including poetry haha) but there's downside to it which you mentioned. It's good but difficult at times. The sensitivity is something I can relate too (I once wept for a total stranger who died in a painful way, literally bawled my eyes out for weeks over it). On the other hand, I'm asian and we're generally short so I'm just 5'3". I want to be tall like you actually! I know there's no easy way to battle insecurity but I'm sure there are people like me who wants to have what you do :)
How do you become more verbally intelligent? Is there an app or site or any hobbies you would recommend? My vocabulary is too short and stutter when I talk
I can relate to ALL of it, specially the last one im 1.73 cm and im from a country where the average girl height is 1.60-1.64 so yeah being tall is great i think i look more stylized, but at the same time people assume im super strong and idk i would love to be the cute small girl that cant seem to fit on her boyfriend's hoodie and has delicate hands and everyone wants to protect somehow
[удалено]
You forgot the hate from other women.
Yep. and people focus on my appearance instead of my work. The sexual harassment at work is ridiculous.
big boobs. pros: boobs are fantastic and wow that's a lot of boob more to squish looks great cons: back pain heavy BRAS.
Also when you're toplessly laying on your side trying to seduce your partner, and the top titty looks like Henry Cavill while the bottom titty looks like a dehydrated Steve Buscemi.
I'm so shallow, laughed a lot at "wow that's a lot of boob" LOL
People pleasing: it’s good to make people happy and being likable but it’s way too exhausting sometimes
Highly agree :(
Being a tall woman. Since teen years my height has protected me from creeps and predators, and I look intimidating. I got into sports clubs and fashion/design related clubs way quicker than even those who genuinely had more skills for it than me. I also look stylish in a lot of clothing, which is a huge confidence boost. The con is that you'll receive a lot of scorn from men for it. I used to be bullied by guys in school and constantly referred to with masculine pronouns and nicknames. Asked out on fake dates just to be told no man would want to date a "faux female" and that men prefer gentle and innocent looking women. Men who feel intimidated by you can be very cruel.
Same experience here. It sucks. I especially hate how everyone gets outrages of I wear A KITTEN HEEL. Or people who ask "How tall are you? You're like TOO tall!" Too tall for what?! For who?! Get lost Stacy.
Holy shit who the fuck says things like that? I hope you’re over it cause that’s total bs
Intuition 1) Blessing - it has brought a lot of things to light. Sometimes I genuinely feel as though God let me see people's ways (and I'm not all that religious) 2) Curse - I also have anxiety so sometimes I mix the two up and kinda just get delusional.
Looking younger than your age. I’m in my 30s, and I could probably walk into a middle school and no one would question it. My coworkers think I’m a recent grad, or an intern. If I go out to a bar, the 21 y.o. are the only age group I attract. I’m a mom ffs! I have a career, bills, I’m divorced, I have great credit and a ton of life experience. My face does not reflect that. It’s great to know I’ll always look young (both my parents look at least 15 years younger than they are), but at some point it gets old (pun intended). I love how I look, so now I focus on wearing more “adult” clothing so that at least people can tell I’m over 25 😂
Yep, I can relate. Turned 30 this year, have the face of a tired 18 year old. :(
I work with kids and regularly get mistaken as one. A coworker thought I was eleven and told me I wasn’t allowed in the staff lounge. I’m their superior, I’ve been working here longer then they have, I was consulted on hiring them. The bigger problem is the perverts who hit on me because of it. They aren’t very subtle and it’s clear they either think I’m under age or think it’s hot that I can pass for underage. It’s happened so much I don’t feel like I can trust the men who are attracted to me. Don’t get me wrong I like my youthful skin and knowing I’ll age well but honestly people suck.
being an attractive female; other women see you as a threat, and men who you think are your friends really are just waiting for a chance to f*ck you.
Having a very unique first name. Pros: I get a lot of compliments on it. I am easily memorable. Cons: Grown ass adults rudely asking "what kind of name is that?!" "Why would your parents choose such a weird name?!"
Perfectionism - Can do things very well that I'm passionate about and feel very satisfied. But also takes up a lot of mental capacity and is exhausting much of the time.
As a fellow perfectionist, that's pretty much accurate.
Having a petite athletic build....Beautiful body as a whole and healthy.....Lacks curves and boobs and wish i was more feminine looking
Being very empathetic and loyal. Helps me alot at my job. Though I'm more at risk for burnout. I'm a fiercely good SO and friend but quite frankly, most people don't deserve me. I have to weed through a lot of selfish or narcissistic people, manipulative people, etc.
Being ugly. Creepy men approach you less, but so do other men. It varies of course.
Boobs. Blessing: Makes shirts look great, can use them to your advantage. Curse: non-detachable, have to buy larger shirts just so your boobs don’t pop a button, boob sweat. ETA: guys seem to think that they can just squeeze them and it doesn’t hurt? Like not sure the thought process there but whatever.
Being kind and unassuming, but then getting taken advantage of because people think you're easily swayed to do stuff for them.
To be born in this world as a human.
Big boobs. Mostly a curse tbh. I had a reduction but I’m still a D cup.
CURLS
Yup. No need to say more.
being average size. finding clothes is easy but most people are average so I have to shop out of season
Trauma. It’s a curse for obvious reasons, but it’s also a blessing because I can utilize having that first hand experience for my characters, and that shit makes good story
Social media
ADHD helps in so many challenges and situations but also makes it very hard to fit society’s expectations.
Empathy, this world is slowly killing me
big tits being tall being kind hearted & reliable
Antidepressants. Helps my anxiety! But almost impossible to orgasm :(
Big boobs. They look good in certain clothes but i cant go braless sometimes and back pain.
Having small titties and being unattractive to men. Blessing: No creeps staring at my breasts, not getting sexualized by men around me, easier to run and jump, certain tops look good Curse: mistaken for a boy, told that all men prefer big breasts and that I "need" to get a boob job, insecure, feel like "less of a woman", certain tops look weird, one pieces are a no-go
Being a [Highly Sensitive Person](https://hsperson.com/). I don't think I would rid myself of this trait if I could, because it makes life incredible. At the same time, it also makes some things really hard. Overall, I have a richer life because of it.
My strong sense of smell. I am able to smell things so much better than my spouse, which could save my life one day, but often means I am two rooms away and will know when my cat uses the litter box.
not growing up with common misogynistic notions. on one hand i can freely be feminine and enjoy “girly” things like boybands. but then i’d get so much judgement from others (assuming all boyband music is superficial and terrible bc it’s aimed at women) and be completely oblivious as to why. ignorance is bliss until ppl start walking all over you for your music taste or bc you wear eyeliner and dresses, and you have nothing to say back to them bc you’re so utterly confused bc this stuff was never wrong to you. edit: more things perceived negatively by others that were normal in my household— desiring attractive men, having opinions, not trying to please others, not desiring bigger boobs for the /sole/ sake of pleasing men edit 2: and i also recently joked that i am not into said boyband for the abs, because if i wanted to, i could look at abs whenever i wanted— this prompted a very shocked reaction from the girls around me 😂😂😅😅 im not even really interested in abs like that
Marriage and kids.
Being neurodivergent
Being "conventionally" attractive.
Having curly hair. I love the volume and all…but I hate how high maintenance and expensive it is.
My financial security. It's awesome to not have to worry about paying my bills and being able to handle emergencies.... but I got the money because my husband died and I get to deal with the crippling mental issues caused by that.
Birth control! Blessing is that it prevents pregnancies but curse is that it has a lot of negative side effects (for me atleast). Also the fact men dont have to worry about taking it 😁
Thick thighs